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thebigdeepcheatsy · 4 years

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Here’s an ancient fanfic I’ve been saving on my iPhone for years!

Flick's Revenge

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I Guess Even Love Has it's Problems

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The sun slowly crawled up the pale blue sky. The last star vanished with no trace. Flowers took their time opening, sending spurts of bright colour scattered across Hyrule Field. It was ten years after Link's adventure in Termina. A sharp whinny filled the air. Link gently kicked Epona in the sides, holding loosely on to the reins. "Thats great, Epona! 'K, how 'bout a trot?" Tightenig his grip and shortening the reins, Link grabbed the neck-band and kicked Epona sharply.

They raced through the trees, branches and leaves smacking Link's face. It made it difficult but Link somehow managed to rise up and down with Epona. As he sped across a wooden bridge, sharp hooves clacking, Link vaguely saw a figure with a shock of green hair as they sped into a canter. Link stopped at the end, and tied up Epona. Then he reached his destination: Kokiri Village.

Saria ran straight for him. Laughing, Link swung her high into the air, whirling her around. Then he tickled her in all her ticklish spots. Saria flicked a green strand into Link's eye.

"Take that!"

"Oooh come here!!" They spent all morning playing, and at 5 to 12 the Kokiri gathered around him, begging him to stay. Link laughed, patting a girl on the head. "Nah sorry, kids. I'm having lunch with someone." They were immensely disappointed, but Link faithfully promised to visit soon, and they cheered up. Link pulled out the Ocarina of Time, and played the Requiem of Spirit.

"Link! Hi! You arrived by ocarina, I see!"

"Hey Nabooru!" Link smiled as he drew nearer her.

"Hey--I got a table set up in that room there. I'll just be a mo putting starters on, 'K." As she left, Link thought once more about how beautiful she was. So fiery. So independent. Link loved her sooo much. As she returned, Link desperately tried to NOT cry out: "I love you!!" but he failed. The Spirit Temple was silent. The usual soft music hummed quietly in the background, and Nabooru just stood, and stared. Then Link dumbly held out his arms. Nabooru giggled uneasily, like laughing at a joke made up by someone with a poor sense of humour. She walked towards him slowly, arms out. She looked a lot like Frankenstein and that kind of worried Link but his love for her was too great, to be afraid.

They dumbly hugged each other. Then Link gazed into her yellow eyes, and touched her lips softy with his own. They finished all three courses in silence, but when Link arrived at Lon Lon Ranch to get some eggs, he leapt up with joy as he told Malon. "...It was just sooo wonderful! She's like...like...heck, she's as pretty as Zelda!"

"Despite her nose." spat Malon acidly, who loved Link more than anything else.

"Ah her nose! The centre of ALL her beauty!"

'YUCK!' thought Malon. But to Link she said: "Really? You have an ODD way of looking at things, Link..." Malon fluttered her eyelashes at him, hoping to catch his attention of HER beauty, but he was babbling on SO much about his dear, sweet, GORGEOUS Nabooru, that she decided to ruin their relationship, but how?

~5 Months Later~

Nabooru squeezed Rauru's hand. Rauru patted her gently on the shoulder, as he led her up the aisle. The Requiem of Spirit was being sung by the monks, who usually sang the Song of Time. Link stared at Nabooru. She was wearing a pure white veil over her mouth, and her long, red hair hung loose. She was wearing a skanty white top with a triforce embroidered on the top. Her trousers were slightly different, they were a little slimmer, with a triforce sewn onto the seat of them. She wore golden shoes instead, and her belt was a PURE huge rupee. She was wearing her usual white gloves and heavy jewellery.

Link's mouth hung open. She looked AMAZING!! Link looked pretty good, too. White tunic and cap. With gold silk hose and shirt. His belt was highly polished brown leather with a gold triforce buckle. And, lastly, his boots were bright red (again with gold triforce buckles) and his gauntlets were the Golden Gauntlets.

Nabooru smiled shyly. The wedding was wonderful. But Malon sat, in her black mourning clothes, glaring all the way through. After the wedding, Nabooru took Link to Gerudo Fortress, his new home. They entered Room 500, Nabooru's 'flat'. It had a bedroom, a kitchen/Dining room, and a bathroom. Link nodded at all Nabooru's stolen riches, though most of it was passed down through her family lines, and she had promised not to steal anymore. "Breakfast is served at 8:00--9:00. If you miss it, theres a perfectly good kitchen here." Link nodded and grinned, and they got into bed...

"Link, I keep getting sick in the morning!". Link looked up from cooking lunch.

"What should we do, Nab?"

"Call the docter! Quick, for godesses sake!!" Link nodded and sped out the door, down the stairs, and rushed into the docter's room. Rita--the docter--looked up and smiled. "Yes, sir?"

"Rita! *splutter* Oh Rita--Come QUICK! *Gasp* It..it's *Pant* Nabby!" Rita grinned from ear to ear.

"Uh-huh? 'K, let's see our leader. hmm...I wonder...?"

Link had to wait outside while Rita inspected Nabooru. It was AGONY. The waiting was, anyway. Rita's grin was even WIDER when she came out. "Link--your wife wants to give you the good news, I think." Link entered, sweating slightly, heart pounding. He smiled shakily. "Y...yes, love?"

"Link, how would you like to be a father?"

"A...a father? Uh, yeah! I'd love to! Those sweet li'l Kokiri--they're sooo brill!"

"Well, congrats, Link--'cause I'm pregnant!"

"Really? Wow. That's great, Nab!"

~9 Months Later~

"Rita! Rita, Nabooru's water broke!!"

"Really? Let's go!!"

Nabooru went into labour about half past four, and the baby came out quarter past nine AM. When it was finally over, Link gazed at his baby. She was just like a gerudo--except for three things. 1. Pointed ears. 2. Blue eyes. And 3. Link's nose.

"What'll we call her?"

"Saloolu."

Malon now knew that she could NEVER have Link, and Talon was bugging her to marry.

"C'mon Mal, I wan' ya t'be safe, hon."

"So?"

"So ah'm yer father an' ya gotta obey me."

"Tough."

But eventually she married a young man named Tirong. And soon they had a son named Mirong. In time Saloolu and Mirong grew up. Saloolu was 21, and Mirong was a year younger. One sunny day Saloolu was walking with her parents (who, like Malon, were in their early forties, and were still quite active. They met Mirong, and immediately the two young adults fell in love. Nabooru winked at Link and they left Saloolu with Mirong. "See ya, Salli!" they called. "He'll be a nice friend for you!"

"Hi..." Blushed Saloolu. She wasn't that used to men outside her family, being a gerudo.

"Hey..." said Mirong.

"So..."

"Princess of the gerudos, eh?"

"Kinda."

"I'm Mirong."

"I..."

"Saloolu?"

"Ummm...yeah."

"MIRONG!!" called a new, sharp female voice. They turned around. There was Malon, hands on hips.

"Hi, mum! Hey--this girl is--"

"A no good gerudo!!"

"Hey, she's p...part Hylian...too.."

"Get to the ranch--NOW! And you." Malon turned to the startled Saloolu. "Shoo! And if I see you NEAR Mirong..." She left the rest unsaid.

Mirong stared sadly at the night sky. Grounded. The moon and stars seemed to smile at him. EVERYTHING reminded him of Saloolu. Especially Saloolu, standing below his window...SALOOLU????!!!!???? He looked down. There she was, beckoning him with a long, painted nail. He nodded, and climbed down. When he reached her, they hugged. "S...sorry about my...mum."

"It's OK."

"Still...I'm sorry."

"Y...y'know...I've been kissed by mum on the forehead by mum, and on the cheek by dad...but..."

"S...same with my parents..."

"I...I've never..."

"Not my first...my first...

"PROPER kiss..."

"We could..." Mirong looked at her...They pursed their lips...Slowly they pressed them together...They stood there together for a minute or two, before breaking away...

"Thanks, Mirong..." They joined hands and walked down to lake Hylia. The night sky was reflected in the clear, glassy lake. Special night flowers--Feldas--started to open. The flowers were pink, purple or blue. Princess Zelda's favourite colours. Mirong picked a blue one, and gave it to Saloolu. Saloolu smiled at him, staring at the starry night. Suddenly a hand fell on her shoulder. Startled, Saloolu looked up. There was Malon, glowering at her. She shoved poor Saloolu into the lake, snatching her Felda. She then grabbed Mirong, and gave him a sound beating. Both verbally and physically. Saloolu thrashed wildly in the water. She was about to give up when a strong man in a Zora tunic lifted her into his arms.

"Dad..." Nabooru worriedly wrapped a red blanket around her. Rita came running forward, saying something. Everything was so hazy...

"...she's...she's DEAD!"

"Link, don't worry. I'm a PROFFESONAL docter! See, listen to her breathing."

"Rita...she's r...right Link..."

"Hey, you're worried too!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!"

"D...da...dad...m...mum..."

"Saloolu!"

"She's safe! Oh Link she's SAFE!!"

"See, fine. Goodbye."

"P...please don't argue..." Saloolu was close to tears.

"Hey, shush, darling. You're OK."

"What happened?"

"W...well..." Link frowned as he listened.

"I knew it..."

"Knew what, Link?"

"Nabooru--she hates us and our daughter. She's JEALOUS of you!"

"Oh my..." Suddenly a fire arrow flew into the room. Saloolu stared. The place was alight!

"Nabooru--get Salli outta here! The chamber of Sages! I'll get the gerudo kids out. The nursery maids'll help me. And the gerudo's will stop the fire. GO!" crying, Nabooru took Saloolu to the chamber of sages.

All the sages were there--Zelda on the triforce symbol. "Nabooru--Malon's gone mad!" Zelda said. "Her love has become hatred and she'll do ANYTHING to kill everyone who likes you and your family!!"

"She's already killed Link--my son" sobbed Darunia.

"And my dad!" cried Ruto. "Along with half the Zoras. Me and some others only just escaped!"

"She set Kokiri village alight." whimpered Saria.

"And gerudo fortress." said Saloolu.

"And part of Hyrule castle market town." sighed Impa.

"And..." began Zelda gravely "she opened the evil realm." The chamber was silent. Saria whimpered.

"Daddy'll have t'kill Ganondorf again."

"That won't be easy..."

"Then I'LL do it!" Everyone stared, astonished. Zelda smiled.

"In a dream I saw you and Mirong sealing Malon and Ganondorf in the evil realm. I'll get Mirong and Link." When they appeared, Zelda explained.

"Are...are you sure?"

"Yes Mirong."

"Then I'll do it."

Malon and Ganondorf were cackling, sending Lighting bolts hurtling towards Lake Hylia.

"Hold it, mum!!"

"Mirong!"

"We're here to stop you!" said Saloolu coldly.

"AHAHAHAHAHAAA! Hey Malon, let's teach 'em a lesson, yeah?"

"'K. SUMMON KOUME AND KOTAKE!!"

The witches appeared, circling around Saloolu and Mirong's heads. The two gripped thier swords, thrashing the women and deflecting their attacks. They combined, 'excellent' thought Saloolu 'easier to pick off!!' That was certainly true! Then Ganondorf created a giant Red Chu-chu! They'd never seen one before, and they hacked helplessly at the pink goo. Then Mirong had an idea. He hacked through the disgusting gunge, and reached the heart. He equipped the Biggoron's sword, and slashed away at it. The chu-chu exploded. Disgusting! Then Ganondorf became Ganon and morphed with Malon!!

"What on Hyrule!!" It sent radioactive Lon Lon milk at them! The battle was awful! Their weapons did NOTHING!! Then Saloolu realized what she had to do. She had taken the Golden Gauntlets. So she put them on, grabbed a chunk of the ranch wall, said a prayer to bless it and...WHAM!

"NOW!!" boomed Mirong, and the sages sealed the two in the evil realm with a big explosion. It was beautiful. Saloolu smiled weakly. The people who died couldn't be raised, but all the damage was repaired. The sages and Lonk matierialized. Mirong was bent over Saloolu's body. She wasn't breathing. Slowly, with tears in his eyes, he bent down and kissed her lips. A great hole in the sky appeared and sent down a red light, a blue one and a green one. It filled Mirong, who passed some on to Saloolu, raising her!! They hugged, and a fortnight later, they married! And had twins. Sirong and Taloolu.

One night Mirong was gazing at the stars, and he sighed. "I guess even love has it's problems..."

~The End~

#The Legend of Zelda #Fanfic #So Bad It’s Good #Long Post

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mavda · 7 years

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Melted

Ch.1 | Ch.2 | Ch.3 | Ch.4 | Ch.5 | Ch.6 | Ch.7 | Ch.8 | Ch.9 | Ch.10 | Ch.11 | Ch. 12 |

Ch.13: Auru Po’hra

To his credit, Auru didn't even flinch.

"Greetings to you, too, Dotour."

"How dare you bring this filthy son of a baba to the council!" bellowed Dotour.

William brought his hands up in surrender, "He was one of the King's most trusted advisors, Dotour, and he has come back to work for the Crown. How was I supposed to not let him come?"

"By not letting him come, you idiot."

"Well, since I am here already, why don't you let me stay as a hearer-"

"You can't just come whenever you want and do as you so damn please."

Aside from Lady Ria, everyone had their eyes open in surprise. Kafei tried to make eye contact with Tela, but she was fixated on Auru.

"Go away before I call th-"

"Sir Auru, may I know why you have come?"

"Princess..." tried Dotour.

"As William said, I have come to offer my services-"

"He left, your Highness," Dotour was trembling in anger, "he left our King back when your mother died, you must know that."

Zelda nodded, "So I was taught, yes. Anything to say, Sir Auru?"

"That it is true. I left because I couldn't stand another second more inside this Castle, and I left your father grieving and with a small daughter in the hands of our responsible Doto-"

"How dare y-"

"Sir Dotour, please let him finish," Zelda nodded to Auru to keep on talking.

"And I have come to see if I can be of help to our current sovereign. That is all."

Dotour muttered under his breath. Zelda pondered for a second.

"We can let him stay as a hearer, Princess. If anything he can give us precious insight-" William tried to smile to the other members, make them agree.

"Are we going to let anyone who was once helpful to the Crown to come back and enjoy privileges?" Lady Ria had scorn on her face.

"According to the law, yes, we should. Every councilpeople that has, in one way or another, helped the Kingdom deserves at least to be treated as a guest of honor upon retirement."

"He did not retire, though, Lady Tela," growled Dotour.

"But his achievements surely supersede that, he was the one who fixed our import taxes and made the blueprints for the roads we now enjoy."

Auru looked surprised, William snickered.

"Yeah, everyone knows that, it's in the textbooks," William sat on his chair, "Princess, as always, the last say is yours."

Zelda frowned, "I don't see why we shouldn't let him stay."

Dotour looked as if he had been sucker punched throughout the meeting.

At least nobody brought up Link's name again.

Dotour had tried, with witty remarks, clever comebacks and even two or three threats, to wake people up from Auru's dumbning aura. But as always, Auru smiled and people believed him. He had arrived, and as soon as people heard his name they would let him do what he wanted.

As always.

Dotour had tried to remind her Majesty that Auru was not a friend, but all she did was hear him out and assure him that she would be cautious.

Dotou went to Lady Ria to unwind, they had to protect the Princess. They had to.

William led Auru through the hallways, he told the man about the princess' favorite flowers, about her life since Auru had left, William gestured towards a patch in the gardens.

"That is her Majesty's favorite place, full of green, smells nice, and it's hidden from prying eyes."

Auru took note of the place, "Think she will let me stay?"

William shrugged, "Whatever the case, I tried," he gave Auru a knowing look, "I helped you. Also, you have a present for her now, she'll appreciate that."

Auru patted the package inside his clothes, "You want me to stay, I assume?"

"You were capable enough back in the King's council, you'll be able to at least give us good insight."

Auru snickered, "Capable enough?"

"Yes, I mean, you never fixed the succession issue, nor the noble mentality, you didn't handle the Bread famine," William raised an eyebrow, "and you had everything in your power to curb it. You couldn't stand up against the King, and you ended up leaving Dotour to clean the mess. So, yeah, kind of capable."

"I'll have to go read about you, so I can smear your mistakes in your face, too."

William bowed his head, "Please do."

The guards eyed them from afar.

"For what is worth, I appreciate your help."

William laughed, "Please, I don't need your gratitude. We work with favors. You owe me one."

William stopped walking, "I hope you stay, Sir Auru."

William left with an energetic pace.

"Son of a baba," breathed Auru.

The guards let him in after giving him a glare full of hate.

Princess Zelda was sitting with the Sun at her back, her hair shone and the light made her face look darker, more menacing. Auru coughed in his hand, and she raised her head, her eyes still glued to her papers.

"Sir Auru," she greeted after a quick glance.

"You Highness."

She finished signing a document and gave him her full attention.

"It is a pleasure to finally meet you, Sir Auru."

"You honor me, your Highness."

Silence filled the room, Auru waited for Zelda to speak, but she had a blank face and gave no sign of moving.

Auru coughed. She was, without a doubt, his friend's daughter. Only a glare and he was shifting uncomfortably, like he had done something wrong.

"William is a really charming man."

Zelda snickered, "That would be an understatement, Sir Auru. He is conniving, audacious and fearless."

"He gave me a present for me to give you."

Zelda softened, "Please take a seat, Sir Auru, forgive my rudeness."

Auru did as told, "You sure resemble your father."

Zelda looked surprised, and then softened, "Thank you, Sir Auru."

Auru looked at her. She was beautiful, her face didn't resemble her father much, but her stance and poise spoke louder. She was waiting for him to talk. He fixed his clothes, tried to give the movement a nonchalant feel, tried not to show how nervous he was.

"As you know, Link asked me to assist you. I could have done it from behind the scenes, but I thought that I could be more useful by being sneaker, and helping you with others not knowing."

"I must admit, I was pretty shocked to know that Auru Po'hra was coming here. I was even more surprised to see you barging in a councilmeeting."

Auru wondered whether she was proud or pissed. Her face remained impassive.

"I hope you'll find my approach the right choice."

"We'll have to see."

Auru frowned, he was here as a friend.

"I mean no offense, your Majesty, but your attitude is quite..."

Zelda held his gaze, "The only thing I know of you is that you left the King, my father, back when he was facing an uprising that claimed my mother's life. I think not kicking you out of the councilmeeting upon barging in is quite a leeway."

"... I came here because Link asked me to-"

"And I appreciate the fact he asked you all to come assist me, I do. But I can't, in good concious, give you things I yet fail to think you deserve. Link asked me to trust you, and I have, I will, but please... you must know how things work here."

Auru patted his clothes, took a package out, "I guess I'll put myself to work then. Though, as you know, this is William's effort, not mine."

Auru let the package in her Majesty's table. Zelda moved her hand, gingerly touched the bundle.

"Letters?"

"I have to assume, looking at the uproar mere letters have causes, that you don't usually send letters to eligible men."

Zelda didn't answer, she was opening the package. They were from Link. She looked up, Auru was smiling.

"What...?"

"They were being retained by some noble William wouldn't give me the name of."

Zelda remembered her father and closed her eyes. She was in control.

"Could you please add to that?"

"Well, for what I've heard, nobody had ever seen you treat a man with such respect and worry. If what they've told me is true, everyone had assumed you would wait till you were in your late twenties to find someone as a consort, everyone relied on that. So, you arrived with a handsome, fearsome, young man and they all lost their minds. You are the future of Hyrule, you are the future of everyone, they fear a nobody will make it crumble."

Zelda thinned her lips.

"And you know this because?"

"William," he gave as an answer, "also Shad, and Ashei, and my own research."

Zelda looked up. Remembered the way her father would talk about his friend. The picture that stood on his bedside table.

"Do you have any advise for me, Sir Auru?"

Auru looked down, to his own hands.

"Are you asking as a ruler or as the daughter of a friend?"

"Both."

"I would advise the ruler to think this through, who is this young man, what can he add to your rule? You have suitors from the noblest of houses, a union with them would be more suitable..."

Zelda untied the package, there were two letters.

"But as the daughter of a friend, and as a friend to the man in question, I would beg of you to never let him go, be it as a supporter or something else."

Zelda opened the first letter. Auru saw a disarray of letters sitting behind her.

"Are those for him, too?"

Zelda puckered her lips, "Yes, I mean, maybe. They will be held in transit so I rather have them with me. I also... I don't know if it's the best to make him come and let him go through... through whatever they'll make him go through. I don't even know if he wants to keep in touch..."

"You have letters from him right in your hands."

She touched the letters. He had told her to never doubt him, she shouldn't.

She opened the first one, Rauru had the sense of looking away and give her a resemblance of privacy.

It read,

'Thanks for sending me back. I needed it. Are you doing alright? Please tell me if you need anything.

PD. You owe me the west wing, I guess.

Link'

Zelda didn't even wait to read the second letter. She felt her heart jump. She was smiling.

Auru felt his heart clench.

"Well," started Zelda, "I guess I'll have to go find a postman."

Auru thought for a second, "Well, if you would like, I actually have a better method."

Zelda gave him a quizzical look.

"You do know about messenger hawks, right?"

And before him, right after being doubted to his very core, Princess Zelda of Hyrule gave him a shocked expression before laughing and giving him a bright smile. And Auru wanted nothing more than to see it again.

"Also, and against what everyone thinks, I'm not trying to marry him."

"Yes, your Majesty."

#the legend of zelda #twilight princess #fanfic #zelink #melted #ch. 13

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