#editing my tags to ad more bc i dont want to make another postabout this

[thecherrygod]

i am. making a mistake

#my posts #im. very depressed. in a bad state. and also ill and unsure if im actually becoming feverish. and its midnight #i. am struggling emotionally and with a class and with motivation and i guess im also underwhelmed #like i have. shit to do. and things id rather be doing. im doing none im just sitting there feeling useless #i. just told a classmate i didnt start my assignment at all yet not even read the material #and he said it makes sense you were a bit sick im sure youll feel better and be able to do it #and i told him that hes wrong bc i would have been able to at least read the material before getting sick #and that if i was doing okay i would still be in the same situation #i. i dont. think i should be having this conversation with him #i dont. know why im doing this. i want to kms #i mean he has talked to me once when he was struggling he broke the mental illness barrier but i dont think i should be passing it either #i feel like i should stop saying whatever the fuck i am saying idk why i started idk if its too late for that #editing my tags to ad more bc i dont want to make another postabout this #yes i made a mistake. idk how to reply without going further into the conversation #'you could do what you told me and do the text to speech thing you sometimes do when you struggle to focus' my guy. my man. i cant #idk what to tell him that isnt an 'i cant even start that i can only open the documents i cant do more than that' i made a mistake #idk how to lie my way out of this idk how to just say 'yeah i should do that' or something and thats it #i mean i guess i do want to have someone to tell them how im actually doing but i dont. think its the right thing to do #also i want to throw up and cry and die and if i knew where our thermometers were id check my temperature #yeah my brain is barely working so since i feel my options are actually answer or ask him to forget i asked #i am asking him to forget i asked #i do feel awful and stupid but i dont think actually replying is good and i dont have another way to do so