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superman86to99 · 8 months

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Action Comics #699 (May 1994)

"THE BATTLE FOR METROPOLIS" STARTS HERE! Well, not here here, since most of the issue is actually just the setup for the battle itself, but this still counts as the first part of the storyline that will reshape the City of Tomorrow forever (in comic book terms, so "for a few months").

We start with Lex Luthor Jr. being interviewed on a panel-style TV show that conveniently recaps all the relevant plot points: Lex Jr. is at war with Project Cadmus because he blames them for the virus that's killing all the clones in Metropolis (including Lex Jr. himself, because he's actually Lex Sr. in a clone body). The Underworld clones living in Metropolis' sewers also blame Cadmus for their malaise and have been voicing their displeasure by breaking Cadmus shit all over the city, using big '90s-type weapons Lex secretly provided.

During the interview, Lex points out that Metropolis' so-called protector hasn't been terribly helpful during the current crisis, but that's because Superman's been occupied dealing with his power issues -- as in, his superpowers going out of whack, not that his landlord cut off his electricity or something. Fortunately, Superman managed to get rid of his excess powers last issue by just letting the Parasite absorb them (which turned the Parasite into a big-ass monster, but that's a problem for another storyline).

After recovering from his fight with the (now-missing) Parasite and confirming with Professor Hamilton that his powers are completely back to normal, Superman catches up with Lois Lane, who recently lost her job due to Lex's h4xx0r skillz. Talking to Lois, Superman finally learns the shocking truth about Lex Luthor Jr. = Lex Luthor Sr., and he also finally connects the dots between the clones of Metropolis getting sick and Lex suddenly looking old and frail.

When Superman goes to confront Lex, he sees that a kinkily dressed-Supergirl is about to kill him and has to stop her (see the Supergirl miniseries for more details on how the heck that happened).

Once Supergirl leaves, Superman goes after her, apparently forgetting what he came to LexCorp for (or deciding to give poor Lex a break, given his frail state). Lex's faithful medical team, Drs. Kelley and Packard, end up putting him in a "hyperbaric chamber"/big healing tube and chopper him to his private yacht so he can recover.

Meanwhile, the city is being evacuated and things are tense between the various groups that are supposed to protect it. A fight is about to break out between members of Team Luthor, the Special Crimes Unit, and Project Cadmus, when some nasty Underworlders suddenly emerge from the ground and attack the Cadmus guys. Superman drops by to reason with the Underworlders, and they actually seem to be listening to him... until Lex, from the safety of his yacht, remotely fires one of those sci-fi guns he gave the Underworlders, and all hell breaks loose. OK, now we can say the battle has started. TO BE CONTINUED!

Plotline-Watch:

We get an appearance from Jimmy Olsen's mom AND Bibbo in the same page?! Oh boy. Unfortunately, Jimmy himself appears too (along with Ron Troupe, both riding Bibbo's bike straight into the danger zone). Interesting that Jimmy has an Uncle Fred and Aunt Lynn in the city, yet he still ended up living in his car for a while. Is there a a deleted scene where he asked if he could crash with them and they just laughed for ten minutes?

Lex publicly blames Cadmus for destroying his private homes all over the world, but those who read the Supergirl mini know that was actually S-Girl subtly letting him know she's breaking up with him. Incidentally, in Supergirl #4, she actually throws Lex through his office's window and Superman rescues him, but in this issue, Superman arrives before she can throw him. Continuity error... or an anomaly caused by a certain time crisis looming in the horizon?!

When Superman is having his check-up with Professor Hamilton, he notices Hamilton seems distraught -- Hambone claims it's because of the chaos going on in the city, but I think it's clearly because Superman didn't even comment on the fact that he just dyed his hair brown at some point since his last appearance.

What with the city being under martial law and all, Perry White moves the Planet's city room to the newspaper's printing plant on the edge of town, and thinks to himself: "I've endured fires, blackouts, and riots, but I've never been forced to evacuate my own city room... until now." He might be talking about the fires, blackouts, and riots that happened during and around the "Blackout" storyline, when Metropolis was going through a Lex-triggered economic crisis.

Incidentally, Perry also seems to notice for the first time that all of the Planet's computer equipment was made by his biggest enemy's company, so he asks to see a test run of anything that's printed from now on. Don Sparrow says: "Interesting that Perry White, no longer a reporter, is the first to have the notion of checking the presses while investigating the wacky headlines Lois was purportedly creating. Lois and Clark are both intrepid newshounds, and neither of them thought of that? I suppose Clark was busy being enormous at the time."

Mayor Berkowitz, usually a level-headed chap, sides with Luthor and says on TV that Cadmus is intentionally creating all that chaos as revenge for that time he and Lex didn't let them steal Superman's corpse (during "Funeral for a Friend"). Surely this means Lex will finally forgive Berkowitz for having him arrested way back in The Man of Steel #4, right? (Spoilers: haha, no.)

I mentioned in our post about Man of Steel #33 that the nonchalant way in which Lois told Superman about Lex Jr. being a clone kinda bugged me. It was so nonchalant, in fact, that Superman didn't even seem to remember that bit of information in this issue, since he exclaims "What?!" when Lois mentions it again. Or maybe he thinks Lex Jr. being a clone was predictable but it's the part about him having Lex Sr.'s brain that took him by surprise? Either way, I'm actually glad we got a do-over on that moment, even if it still wasn't as dramatic as I would have hoped for.

Patreon-Watch:

This post was published today and not in like three months thanks to the Superman '86 to '99 Patreon gang, Aaron, Chris “Ace” Hendrix, britneyspearsatemyshorts, Patrick D. Ryall, Bheki Latha, Mark Syp, Ryan Bush, Raphael Fischer, Kit, Sam, and Bol. You rule!

You know who also rules? Don Sparrow, who has more commentary on this issue after the jump...

Art-Watch (by @donsparrow):

We start off with the cover, and it’s a very blocky, Kirby-like pose, of Superman fast-walking into gunfire. I love the one eye in shadow, which gives the pose an intimidating and mysterious air we’re not used to seeing with Superman. As always, Guice’s Superman seems to have the longest Tarzan locks (at least until Stuart Immonen joins the team) and that’s true here.

Inside the issue we get extremely '90s guest artwork by Norman Felchle and James Pascoe, and while it’s not my cup of tea, he is remarkably consistent throughout. Felchle would go on to do storyboard work for Pixar, Netflix, Marvel and others, so hopefully he isn’t sweating the criticism from a never-was like myself! The opening splash page is a good example of the 90’s style “extreme” stylization, as we see a computer-generated Lex Junior with a big old curly tress blocking his eye.

The length of this stylization changes panel to panel. We get more extreme linework a page later as Perry White’s disapproving expression makes his forehead look like cracking clay. [Max: Are we sure this isn't Darkseid posing as Perry as part of some nefarious plan?] After this argument, we get our first look at Superman himself, and it’s not bad overall—the S-shield is consistent throughout, and his wavy hair is well rendered. One of the main things that bug me about this art style (apart from when he attempts regular clothing, but we’ll get to that) is that every male character has an identical nose, particularly from the front view. Once I noticed it, I couldn’t stop seeing it. [Max: Dang, can't unsee it either.]

A few pages later, as Superman trails the Parasite underground, we get an example of Felchle’s penchant for perhaps-unnecessary detail. Rather than the gritty cement he has at the top of the panel, the Metropolis sewer is drawn to have been made up of European cobblestone, which is both pleasing to look at, and an unlikely building material, especially some 20 feet below the ground. Felchle does excel at motion—there’s a great image of Superman flying away from Professor Hamilton’s apartment.

It’s followed immediately, however, by the strange physics of Lois Lane dislodging a cathode ray television set with a couch pillow! The following page is the best example in the book of Felchle’s aforementioned weakest point—drawing regular humans in regular human fabric. Lois’ green sweater clings in such an unnatural and revealing way to her body that it appears to be made of cellophane (there was a similar instance earlier in the book when a beat cop’s uniform appeared to have been painted on, and again in a few pages on poor old silver-haired Sarah Olsen). [Max: To be fair, Byrne did establish early on that Mrs. Olsen is actually pretty young and attractive, but her hair greyed prematurely.] Sadly for the industry, this kind of cheap fan service depiction of women would become the norm rather than the exception in the decade to come, but in this era, it is a real deviation from the naturalistic look we’ve gotten used to.

A few pages later we get a tiny glimpse into the concurrently running Supergirl mini-series, where Superman talks Supergirl out of taking her vengeance on Lex Jr. too far. This whole scene is a little blasé for my tastes, as the stuff Supergirl describes (attempted murder, cloning experiments) is as bad or worse than the stuff Lex Jr. has been pulling on Lois. As Guardian looks for the Underworlders, we get still more of Felchle’s unique brickwork, this time above ground, at least. Lastly, we get a pretty lean and mean Superman on the final couple of pages as the Underworlder/Cadmus conflict becomes a shooting war. The three-fingered mutant firing on Superman recalls a couple Byrne panels, starting with flesh-suit Metallo getting (temporarily) blown away by S.W.A.T team members in Superman #1, and also Superman getting shot at by Bloodsport a few issues later in Superman #4.

STRAY OBSERVATIONS:

There’s just a ton of stories going on here, perhaps too many to comfortably deal with in a single issue. We have the abrupt end of the Super-giant storyline (with no sighting of the Parasite that Superman crashed to Earth with), the who-cares war between Cadmus and the Underworlders [Max: I care, Don! I care!!], the Lois-bonkers headline storyline, the Lex-is-dying storyline, and then even a glimpse at Supergirl’s mini-series. It’s no wonder this issue feels quite long, but also incomplete.

It’s nice to see a little more of the Daily Planet’s operations, but the introduction to plant manager Jeff (no last name) and Jane (no last name) are so quick, and staged so distantly, we really get no sense of them as people. [Max: Jane Stewart, Don! Big fan of Jane Stewart, who appears for all of three panels. I don't know if she ever shows up again, but I'm giving her a tag on the blog anyway.]

Without saying too much, they’re certainly telegraphing who the mole in Lex’s organization is. Whenever this character appears in this issue they’re either admonishing Lex, or revealing details of Lex’s life to underlings. The reveal they’re setting up for really doesn’t feel so shocking after all this. [Max: Is it Vekko? I bet it's Vekko.]

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superman86to99 · 3 months

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Action Comics #700 (June 1994)

"THE BATTLE FALL OF METROPOLIS"! Metropolis falls, quite literally! But, on the bright side, so does Lex Luthor, because Lois Lane finally busts his ass after 700 issues (give or take).

This super-sized anniversary issue starts with Lois recapping all the dirt she's dug up on "Lex Luthor Jr." during the past several months, including the fact that he's actually the original, supposedly dead Lex Luthor in a clone body. Lex tried to have Lois discredited by planting wacky headlines with her byline at the Daily Planet's computers and framing her for financial crimes (on top of blowing up her apartment), but now she finally has hard evidence of his crimes thanks to her informant at LexCorp, only known as "Deep Quote." (Is this the first reference to Linda Lovelace's oeuvre in a Superman story? Comics and/or porno historians, sound off in the comments.)

Despite having been fired from the Planet (see: "wacky headlines" above), Lois manages to present her evidence in front of Commissioner Henderson, Perry White, and Planet owner Franklin Stern... who still thinks this cloning business sounds like "science fiction." That's a weird thing to say when you live in the DC Universe. Hell, there's a whole government agency devoted to cloning just outside Metropolis! Or maybe I should say there was, because, right when Stern is about to apologize to Lois, everyone hears a massive explosion coming from Project Cadmus' direction -- as seen last issue, some of Lex's armored henchmen just dropped a goddamn mountain on Cadmus while fighting Superman and Superboy.

Superboy, who was all laughs last issue but seems to be taking his friends' apparent deaths much harder now, wants to look for survivors, but Superman again tells him there's no point, because "there's no one alive in Cadmus that needs our help anymore." Instead, they go look for the Lex-Men who caused this whole mess so they can bring them to justice. They're soon joined by Supergirl, who takes every opportunity she can get to destroy LexCorp property since breaking up with Lex himself in her recent miniseries (and that was before she found out he's actually a creepy old guy in a young body).

Meanwhile, Lex (whose clone body is rapidly deteriorating) is hiding in his yacht with his most faithful cronies, his scientific aide Dr. Sydney Happersen and his long-time physician Dr. Gretchen Kelley, the same woman who pretended to be his "mother" for the Lex Jr. ruse. Since Lex is gonna be here for a while, Dr. Kelley volunteers to go to the city and pick up some meds for him. Lex thinks that's a great idea... until he sees Kelley on TV, spilling the beans on his whole operation to Lois. That's right, Kelley was "Deep Quote" all along! Which was pretty obvious if you've been paying attention, but then again Lex has a long history of rejecting the obvious.

Kelley also spilled the beans on Lex's location to Superman, who suddenly bursts into the yacht to nab him once and for all. But Lex has an ace that he's been hiding up his sleeve for a long-ass time: a slew of "sonic torpedoes" reverse engineered from tech left behind by the alien invaders from DC's 1988 Invasion! crossover, which he hid somewhere under Metropolis in case he ever felt like pulverizing the city. Lex, who thinks he'll die any moment, seems perfectly willing to take millions with him -- until Superman asks him if he really wants the people of Metropolis, "his" city, to remember him as the guy who blew the whole place up. The "American Hitler," as Superman puts it.

Lex, who got into this whole mess in the first place because he wanted people to love him more than Superman, breaks down and agrees not to launch the torpedoes.

And then, for the first time in his life... Dr. Happersen disobeys Lex Luthor's wishes. Too bad those wishes were "let's not destroy a city."

After years of quietly taking abuse from Lex, Happersen finally snaps and launches those torpedoes. Lex tries to stop him by shooting at him with the death laser in his iron lung (of course Lex Luthor has a death laser in his iron lung), but it's too late. The torpedoes are activated, meaning that the city is as cooked as Happersen himself, who dies in Superman's arms seconds later.

Superman asks Luthor where the torpedoes are buried, but Lex, who looks genuinely distraught, honestly doesn't know. He always let Happersen handle little details like that.

Before Superman can even reach Metropolis, one of the torpedoes has already hit the WGBS building. He gets there right in time to race against the torpedo headed for the Daily Planet... but, as you might have guessed from this issue's cover, the torpedo wins the race.

If the city hadn't been evacuated a few issues ago due to the Underworlders' terrorist attacks, everyone in the Planet's staff would be dead now (thanks, ugly sewer mutant terrorists!). Superman does manage to prevent Lois, Ron Troupe, and, unfortunately, Jimmy Olsen from getting rolled over by the Planet's iconic globe after the building collapses, but only by destroying what's left of it. Perry White is following the action from the Planet's temp offices outside the city, and he looks about as emotionally devastated as he did in the issue when his son died.

Meanwhile, the other underground torpedoes are doing their best to turn Metropolis' skyline into a flat line. The only major building spared is the one belonging to Clark Kent's old employer, Newstime Magazine, but only because its owner happens to be a demonic entity with torpedo-deflecting powers, Lord Satanus. To his credit, Satanus does plant an idea in Superman's mind for how to stop the rest of the torpedoes: digging a big ditch all across Metropolis to intercept them (thanks, demonic entity posing as media magnate!).

As Superman, Superboy, and Supergirl stop most of the torpedoes, Satanus helps them out by redirecting the remaining ones to a more deserving target: LexCorp's giant L-shaped building, which is now shaped like a bunch of rubble.

With the torpedo problem solved, Luthor is finally arrested and exposed to the citizens of Metropolis as a no-goodnik, as Superman begins the long task of rebuilding the city by putting the Daily Planet globe back together. Yes, Metropolis is in pretty bad shape, and even Superman himself seems discouraged for a moment, but as Lois correctly points out: hey, at least it ain't Coast City!

Creator-Watch:

This issue marks the end of Roger Stern's distinguished run as Action Comics writer, which began exactly 100 issues ago... sort of, since he started writing Action when it was a weekly series and Superman only got two pages per issue. When John Byrne suddenly left the Superman books some months after that, in late 1988, Stern was an obvious choice to replace him, given his closeness to Byrne, his ample talents, and, well, the fact that he was already there.

Since then, Stern became one of the main architects of the over-arching storyline that made this era in Superman comics so special. His role as the Super-Squad's resident "continuity cop" enriched these comics tremendously. For instance, according to Dan Jurgens, it was Stern's idea to bring back an obscure character called Hank Henshaw as the Cyborg Superman instead of creating a new baddie for "Reign of the Supermen," which is the sort of thing that makes digging through hundreds of backissues worth it. Stern also wrote the bulk of the years-long Eradicator saga, Supergirl's evolution from lump of goo to proper hero, and, of course, Lex Luthor's long, strange journey leading to this issue (more on that later).

It's hard to imagine our beloved '86-'99 period without Roger Stern. Good thing he'll be back before too long, albeit in a reduced capacity...

Character-Watch:

With this issue, we a bid adieu to doctors Sydney Happersen and Gretchen Kelley, two of the most memorable characters ever to serve as Luthor's lackeys. Both were introduced in Byrne's Superman #2 (1987), and it's interesting that both were instantly portrayed as somewhat sympathetic: Happersen doesn't want to remove the kryptonite from Metallo's chest because he thinks it'd kill him (and looks shocked when Luthor pulls it out anyway), and Kelley is the one that warns Lex about Lana Lang's bizarre allergy to truth serum.

(Probably didn't help that they had a serious mold problem in that room.)

It's also interesting that Kelley was the only lackey on a first-name basis with Lex, hinting at the backstory that was revealed in Action #660: she was a small-town doctor until a young Lex swept her off her feet and turned her into his lover, only to ditch her for someone with larger boobs. Kelley became an alcoholic and ended up in jail, ruining her medical career, until Lex came to "reclaim" her and gave her a permanent job. I'm guessing the "old lovers" bit was added mainly to make the Lex Jr. story seem plausible, but it also helps explain why someone like her would stick with Lex for so long. She was clearly still in love with him, and the Lex Jr. ruse allowed her to imagine an alternate life where they were more than just employer and employee. I always like this bit from Action #676, before readers found out Lex Jr. was Lex Sr.:

In the Lex Jr. storyline, Kelley wasn't just lying to the world; she was lying to herself. Until she just couldn't lie anymore, I guess.

As for Happersen, he never had a backstory, but he didn't really need one. He was the prototypical meek henchman who'd do anything for his boss despite being treated like trash, which is why I found his breakdown at the end both logical and satisfying. Kelley and Happersen will each get a couple of flashback appearances after this issue, but they've been completely ignored by every revamp and reboot since. As much as I like them, I'm completely okay with that because their stories are over, and that's such a rare thing in comics.

Plotline-Watch:

The big subplot in this issue is Lana Lang's wedding to Pete Ross, which she said she wanted to hold "as soon as possible" after encountering Bizarro (and confirming that she's absolutely over Clark) in Action #697. Lois, Clark, and Supergirl are a bit busy to attend, but Ma and Pa Kent are there and even lend Lana their farmhouse for the ceremony. Other than Pa watching the chaos in Metropolis on TV, these scenes are completely disconnected from the rest of the issue, and I suspect they're only here for two reasons: 1) to tease readers with "Someone's getting married!" in the preview blurbs (remember that Lois and Clark had been engaged for a few years by now), and 2) to give Superman legends Curt Swan and Murphy Anderson some work. That last part makes the scenes worth it, in my opinion, especially since we even get a peek at how Swan would draw the Super-Mullet when Lana is thinking back on everything she's gone through with Clark.

The "we've had buildings dropped on us" scene Lana remembers is from Action #644, and the one who dropped the building was actually Supergirl/Matrix when she was suffering from Eradicator-triggered insanity. The "I've been kidnapped" issue, meanwhile, is Byrne's classic Superman #2, which leads us to...

Intentionally or not, there's a good numbers of parallels between this issue and the aforementioned Superman #2: Lana's most tragic moment and Lana's happiest moment; Happersen and Kelley's introduction and their exit; Superman angrily bursting into Lex's office and triumphantly bursting into his yacht; Lex getting away with it and Lex getting arrested. But the most significant connection is the fact that Superman #2 was the first time Lex put on his kryptonite ring, which is what sets off the long chain of events leading to this issue: him getting cancer (Action #600), faking his own death (Action #660), moving his brain to a younger body (revealed in Action #678), being infected with a clone-only disease (circa Man of Steel #31), and ending up as a sick, raving lunatic in an iron lung outfitted with death lasers.

What's definitely intentional, knowing Stern, is the fact that Lex's last stand happens in the Sea Queen, the same luxury yacht where he first met Superman (The Man of Steel #4). Both issues end with Lex getting arrested, but presumably he'll be behind bars for longer than two hours this time -- or maybe not, since the last time we see Luthor, he's thinking that "there are cards I've yet to play!" We'll find out what he means in Action #701.

While Lois is presenting her evidence against Lex, we learn that she first came into contact with Dr. Kelley/"Deep Quote" at the end of the "Bizarro's World" storyline, right after she learned of Lex Jr.'s sickness/shocking baldness (Superman #88). Unsurprisingly, Lex didn't like Lois seeing him like that and ordered Happersen to capture her, but Kelley helped her escape and they hit it off.

When exactly did Kelley decide to turn on Lex? A flashback suggests that it happened during the Supergirl miniseries, where she has an uncharacteristic outburst towards Lex for the way he "uses" Supergirl even though she loves him. We didn't even comment on that scene at the time, but now it seems pretty obvious that, even though Kelley does care for Supergirl, she was actually talking about herself.

Deep cut: at one point, Superman tries to find Lex by taking a Lex-Man's helmet to Professor Hamilton, who says that he recognizes this technology from the armor Lex once trapped poor Jose "Gangbuster" Delgado in, forcing him to act as a remote-controlled bodyguard (Adventures #451). Hamilton's efforts go nowhere, but I appreciate being reminded of Jose's most delightfully bizarre misadventure ever. Miss that dude and his horrible luck.

I also appreciate the shout out to Invasion!, and I wonder if Stern was planning Lex's sonic torpedo gambit from way back in Superman #28, which includes a scene in which Pentagon officials give Lex access to the alien weapons recovered in Australia. I also wonder if Lex thought to himself, "Hmmm, Australia... seems like a nice place to pretend to be from if I ever clone myself a new body."

Something that doesn't pay off is the implication that Colin Thornton/Lord Satanus would become a major villain now that Luthor is (temporarily) out of the picture. He'll pop up here and there, but something tells me that if Stern had stayed on Action, he would have made sure Satanus factored more heavily in big storylines going forward (or even just one big storyline).

Patreon-Watch:

This post ended up being double-sized like the issue itself, so this time we owe double-thanks to our patrons Aaron, Chris “Ace” Hendrix, britneyspearsatemyshorts, Patrick D. Ryall, Bheki Latha, Mark Syp, Ryan Bush, Raphael Fischer, Kit, Sam, Bol, and Gaetano Barreca, for helping us take the time to write it. Double-thanks! Join them at https://www.patreon.com/superman86to99

And believe it or not, we have even more to say about this issue, so don't miss Don Sparrow's section after the jump...

Art-Watch (by @donsparrow):

We begin with the cover, and it’s something of a strange one for such a huge numbered issue. Jackson Guice rightly recognizes that the destruction of the Daily Planet is the most arresting image within the story, so that’s what he highlights, Raiders of the Lost Ark-style, but it’s a bit hard to know what to focus on here. It’s not the best figure drawing of Lois Lane, with her hands in a claw like shape, but she’s still front and centre. The other possible area of focus is on the Daily Planet globe itself, which then boasts an uncomfortably spread-eagle Superman trying to stop its roll. But, I give points to Guice for going with a moment from within the story, and not just a generic “this is an anniversary issue” type cover, like we often see. Plus the cross streets of Jurgens/Grummett/Bog/Kitson on the street sign is a fun find.

Inside, we’re greeted immediately with a full splash of a satisfied Lois. Guice’s Lois has always looked photo-referenced to me, for better or worse. In this case, I think Guice is a little let down by the colourist, who extends the pinkness of Lois’ bottom lip all the way to the corner of her mouth which turns her smile into more of a smirk than I think the inks on their own intend.

On page 6 we get another version of Guice’s rubble pits—not a strength for him as much as someone like Tom Grummett, who was born to draw rubble (And everything else!) as the edges of the pit always look a little sharp to me.

Superboy’s rage at the destruction of Cadmus is well-observed—and Superboy looks very much like the youth he is—he can sometimes be drawn like a small adult, instead of having softer, teenaged features, but Guice does a good job on this page. Supergirl’s coy expression as she lets the libidinous Superboy down gently on page 14 is a funny drawing, and a great character moment in all the action, to boot.

It may just be novelty, or nostalgia, but the quieter moments back in Smallville, as Lana Lang prepares for her wedding ceremony, are my favorite pages. Curt Swan’s gentle, naturalistic lines are a nice counterpoint to the hectic pace of the fall of Metropolis.

The entire page of Lois revealing Lex Junior’s crimes to a live television audience is all well drawn—there’s an urgency in Lois’ posture to the camera that feels very real as you read it. This, followed up shortly by Lex’s horror at Dr. Kelley’s betrayal is another great piece of drawing. Then, on the very next page, Superman Kool-Aid-Man-ing his way through Lex’s hideaway is maybe the best single image of Superman in the book.

There’s a cute tribute to former Super-teamster, Jerry Ordway, as Peggy (who shares her first name with Jerry Ordway’s real life wife) plays De Koven and Scott’s “Oh Promise Me” not on a Steinway piano, as she might have on our Earth, but rather a “Jordway” piano. If the lyrics we see sound familiar, it could be because this same wedding song appeared in numerous film and TV weddings, including All in the Family, Mama’s Family and, for you Canadian readers, the Sullivan-produced Anne of Green Gables: The Sequel, during Diana’s wedding. I do wonder if Revered Brewster was supposed to look like Ordway—his hairstyle is similar, though Brewster is a little heavier set than Ordway.

Back to the “action” of Action #700, pages 33-35 all make great use of a diagonal panel layout, to maximize the space as Superman gives chase to the missiles, which unfortunately find their target, the Daily Planet. Perry White’s shattered expression as he watches the place he loves fall apart is particularly haunting.

The effect of Collin Thornton’s demonic helmet overlaid his human form is a great visual. Lastly, for those of us old enough to remember the attacks of 9-11, there’s an eerie prescience to these images of tangled debris and smoking skylines.

On the whole, the events here—Luthor going full villain, Metropolis being reduced to rubble—seem fitting in scale for a nice big round issue number like 700. But, given how relatively quickly these changes are undone in the issues to come, it also feels symbolic of the post-Death-and-Return era of comics—just trying status-quo changing “events” and trying to recapture the buzz they stumbled into with the death storyline.

SPEEDING BULLETS:

There’s a funny in-joke during Lois’ phone call with Superman, as editor Mike Carlin slips in a warning to Tom Grummett about an issue being late. Though Grummett is not normally known for lateness, at this time he is drawing both Superboy and Robin comics monthly, so he can be forgiven for the odd slip.

Jonathan Kent railing at the television in response to Lex’s seeming impunity feels completely modern to me, reading it in 2024. Honestly, couldn’t you see certain political factions of today defending Lex’s actions, had they been perpetrated by the de facto leader of their party?

How do we feel about Lex not being quite villainous enough to blow up Metropolis? Does it feel like a cop-out, or would it have put Lex into a level of villainy the writers didn’t want to go to? Story-wise, I have to admit, it feels strange that the disasters seen on the cover and throughout bear the fingerprints of Sidney Happersen, and not Lex Luthor, the greatest criminal mind of our age. [Max: I like it! Lex is evil, but he does seem to love Metropolis in his way, and he wouldn't spend so much time on philanthropic ventures if he didn't need people's adoration on some level. I think this is an interesting conundrum Stern put him in, and having Happersen do what Lex couldn't is a clever way to make sure the issue didn't end in a big anti-climax.]

GODWATCH: As with many a Roger Stern script, religious references abound in this issue, particularly during the wedding scenes, where the newlywedded Lana and Pete certainly seem devout. The unabashed love the Kents show for Lana is very moving throughout. [Max: There's also Lex saying "God forgive me" when he admits he doesn't know how to stop the torpedoes, which is a scene that's always stuck with me. THAT'S his real punishment: not jail, but actually experiencing guilt for a moment.]

As this entire issue is a study in contrasts, we jump from a country church wedding to a demonic character named LORD SATANUS giving Superman the firebreak idea that saves the city! There’s something very funny about that.

Does Collin Thornton know that Clark Kent is Superman? It doesn't seem like he does, but with his array of observational powers, you’d think he’d have figured it out. [Max: I'm sure there's something somewhere that contradicts it, but I like the idea of Thornton offering Clark that editor job years ago because he knew his conscience had been compromised by the Eradicator and he wanted a superpowered pawn to use against Blaze.]

Do you agree with Supergirl, that Dr. Kelley is someone to be admired, or given mercy? Sure, she helped bring down Lex in his latest evil, but she went along with so much, for so long, she’s hardly heroic, is she? [Max: I assume that by "I hope the courts are merciful," Supergirl means "I hope they give her prison library access and not the electric chair." I do feel sorry for Kelley, but she definitely deserves to go to jail for a long time for all those other horrible crimes she didn't prevent, starting with Lana's torture.]

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superman86to99 · 1 year

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Adventures of Superman #511 (April 1994)

Superman returns to Metropolis after the events of "Bizarro's World" and finds that... there's no Metropolis. It's completely gone. Did someone pull a Coast City on it? Is Brainiac back to his Pre-Crisis city-stealing ways? Superman flies down to take a closer look at the nothignness, only for the buildings to suddenly re-appear right in front of him, making him clumsily crash into one. And right in front of some hot ‘90s babes, too. How embarrassing.

Turns out Metropolis wasn't gone: Superman's powers are so out of control (as seen in recent months) that he didn't realize his X-Ray vision was making him see through the entire city. Superman tries to rescue the people falling off that building with the old "air cushion" trick, but he ends up creating a mini-tornado and injures more people. When Maggie Sawyer and the Special Crimes Unit show up to find out who's been going around destroying buildings and injuring pedestrians, Superman volunteers to be arrested for everyone’s safety, but Maggie is like "eh, let's just pretend this didn't happen... this time."

She does encourage Superman to go get his condition checked out by a specialist ASAP (which, come to think of it, he should have done weeks ago). Superman goes to Professor Hamilton, who determines that his internal solar battery has gone out of whack and is making him absorb too much energy after being exposed to some sort of kryptonite-like substance. And when was the last time Superman encountered kryptonite? At the end of "Reign of the Supermen," when a big blast of it passed through the Eradicator first and instantly gave Superman his powers back. "A bit of foreshadowing," as the Professor says.

According to Hamilton, Superman's powers will keep increasing until his body can't contain them anymore and, I guess, explode. The Professor does suggest a possible solution: taking Superman's excess energy and giving it to those sick Underworld clones who have been dying off all over Metropolis (as part of that OTHER long-ass storyline we've been seeing recently). Superman likes the idea but decides that a massive government agency would be better equipped to make it happen than some ex-con in a run down building (sorry, Hambone), so he flies over to Project Cadmus to tell them about it.

Like two minutes after Superman arrives at Cadmus, the place is attacked by some Underworlders who believe Cadmus created the illness that's killing them. Superman and the Guardian team up to stop the clones, but it isn't a terribly long fight, since the Underworlders are dropping off like flies. Very big flies.

Meanwhile, we find out that LexCorp is currently being attacked by OTHER clones and Lex Luthor Jr. is trapped inside. Lex sends a televised message blaming Cadmus for the attack and promising to "deal" with them "once and for all." In other words: WAR. TO BE CONTINUED!

Plotline-Watch:

Of course, those clones attacking LexCorp weren't sent by Cadmus, they were sent by the mad scientist living UNDER Cadmus, Dabney Donovan. Earlier in the issue, Dabney snooped into a heated Zoom call between Lex Jr. and Cadmus' Director Westfield where the latter refused to join forces to cure the Clone Plague, because he thinks Lex would just steal their tech. Lex indignantly accuses Westfield of putting lives at stake (meaning HIS life specifically, since he secretly lives in a clone body). Dabney worries that Lex might attack Cadmus and thus endanger his own operation, so he... attacks Lex and makes it look like it was Cadmus? They don't call him "mad" for nothing.

Westfield's comment about Kryptonian DNA is obviously a reference to Cadmus' troubles attempting to clone Superman after his death, which resulted in them giving up and creating Superboy. Incidentally, Superman asks Guardian how Superboy is doing, given the whole “clones dying” thing (the Newsboy Legion kids are in pretty bad shape), and Guardian just says he's "been through a lot lately." In other words: buy his solo series if you want to know if he's dying too, kids!

Back to Lex, he instructs Dr. Happersen (still wearing bandages over his head after Bizarro burned him) to contact the Underworlders, presumably with nefarious purposes. In the same scene, we learn that Lex has a virus in LexCorp computers that alerts him to any mention of his name. And guess who happens to be using a LexCorp computer to write an article about how Lex murdered his personal trainer?

We've been following Lois Lane's investigation into the Sasha Green murder for a while, but I'm a little confused about the "father" part above. Does that mean Lois knows Lex Jr. is Lex Sr.? When did she find out? Did she put two and two together after learning clones are getting sick and seeing Lex all frail last issue?

Don Sparrow points out: "As far as I know, this issue's billboard is the first appearance of Whitty Banter, the David Letterman of the DCU. It's a confusing look, though, as he seems to be a blonde, musclebound Billy Batson lookalike, with John Lennon glasses, so apart from having a talk show, he doesn’t greatly resemble any real world hosts. (A quick look into it indicates Banter’s first in-person appearance is a few years later, in Superman #117. He also appears in Man of Steel #67, where the Letterman connection is made more explicit, though Banter’s face doesn’t appear in either issue.)” As we pointed out on Twitter, there was also a reference to Whitty in the letters page for Adventures #511, in answer to a letter praising his real life counterpart, colorist Glenn Whitmore.

Patreon-Watch:

This post was sneak peek’d at patreon.com/superman86to99 earlier this month! Shout out to patrons Aaron, Chris “Ace” Hendrix, britneyspearsatemyshorts, Patrick D. Ryall, Bheki Latha, Mark Syp, Ryan Bush, Raphael Fischer, Kit, Sam, and Bol; we are the Dabney Donovans leeching off of your Cadmus. We’ve been slacking on the exclusive Patreon material lately (other than the sneak peeks) but we hope to have more to show you in the next year, including more Elseworlds reviews and out-of-continuity stuff.

But right now: more Don Sparrow, under the jump!

Art-Watch (by @donsparrow):

We start with the cover, and it’s a very good one, with a grim Superman and Guardian ready for battle. Perhaps a little generic, and lacking in background, but it’s just a great drawing of the protectors of Metropolis, even if it doesn’t give much of a hint to the actual story. Inside the book we are greeted almost immediately by the real reason people check in on this blog each and every week: wall to wall ass. Superman crashes through a skyscraper Zack Snyder style while a diverse group of sunbathers look on. This is fairly racy for a code book from 1994, so it’s worth a mention.

I love Barry Kitson’s art (even if the Jim Lee-style hatching is a bit overpowering at this time) so it’s a challenge to narrow down outstanding panels, because it’s all pretty great. But the drawing of Maggie Sawyer in full tactical gear is a highlight, as her boots, body suit, and armour all appear to have a different surface texture. Great stuff. There is lots of laboratory scenes in this issue, from Professor Hamilton’s studio apartment to Project Cadmus, and all the technical equipment and wires look appropriately high-tech.

As the only action scene (Superman and Guardian battle a dying and apparently nameless Underworlder) unfolds, the image of Guardian shielding himself from an energy blast is well drawn and well coloured.

That scene is as close to we get to excitement in this story, which was definitely one of the less eventful issues I can remember. It moves the ongoing “B” stories (Superman is overpowered, Lois is investigating Sasha Green, the clones are all dying) without having much of an “A” story. Still there’s always forward motion in this era, setting up for the next big thing.

STRAY OBSERVATIONS:

The idea that Lex is monitoring Lois Lane, and is in turn being monitored by Dabney Donovan is a trippy one, especially if we add in the layer that we, as readers are monitoring them all. One small detail I’d like to highlight here is that Dabney Donovan refers to himself while he monologues, which is quite helpful to new readers, who might be thinking, “who is this guy, and why isn’t he fighting a blue hedgehog?”

Speaking of DCU analogues, apparently one of their daytime dramas is called Secret Hospital which sounds a lot more exclusive than our General Hospital.

I do love that for all his many sins, Lex II is about to be brought down by journalism, rather than superheroic fisticuffs.

The attacking Underworlder (if he got named, I missed it) seems like a riff on the Incredible Hulk, referring to the Cadmus agents he’s fighting as “puny soldiers”.

Slightly amusing to me that the Underworlder attacker refers to Newsboys and Superboy as “dogs on a leash”, when Cadmus once had their own strike team flat out called the Bloodhounds (who are currently chilling with Doctor Stratos in the “never seen again” lounge). [Max: Actually, someone let us know recently that Doctor Stratos DID appear again in a Roger Stern Superman novel in the 2000s, to my shock... What if the Bloodhounds also have a novel we never learned of? Or an entire YA book series? It’s possible.]

#superman #karl kesel #barry kitson #james pascoe #whitty banter #maggie sawyer #special crimes unit #paul westfield #project cadmus #dabney donovan #sydney happersen #sasha green #emil hamilton #guardian #newsboy legion #underworlders #clone plague #wall to wall ass #rip nameless underworlder

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