#fasten bra straps and remove dentures

[sohannabarberaesque]

Guaranteed to be the sort of back road giving your "meddling-kids-and-dog" types the proverbial creeps overnights:

#hanna barbera #photo headcannon #meddling kids and dogs #back roads #dirt roads #fasten bra straps and remove dentures #scooby doo #the funky phantom #goober and the ghost chasers #clue club #hannabarberaforever

[sohannabarberaesque]

Meanwhile, approaching a rather grotty-looking stretch of road in the country

[Wherein we find the van of Beegle Beagle and his oversized simian compadre, The Great Grape Ape, stopping a little cautiously while--]

BEEGLE BEAGLE, reading the sign: "Mininum Maintenance Road--Travel At Your Own Risk" [clearing a lump in his throat, then--] "Remove Dentures and Fasten Bra Straps"?!! [With a mild sense of frustration] I just cannot--CANNOT--believe what our roads are being reduced to! And you thought such a caveat wouldn't happen here!

THE GREAT GRAPE APE: That's putting it mildly! Grape Ape! Grape Ape!

BEEGLE BEAGLE, still with some mild frustration: Which makes you wonder, purple pal ...

[We can hear a snatch of "40 Miles of Bad Road" playing in the background]

#vignette #hanna barbera #the great grape ape #beegle beagle #country roads #fasten bra straps and remove dentures #40 miles of bad road #hannabarberaforever

[sohannabarberaesque]

Meanwhile, with The Banana Splits in their Banana Buggies on a scramble over some Mininum Maintenance Road somewhere "out in the country"

BINGO, taking notice of the sign indicating that said road was a Mininum Maintenance such: "Remove Dentures and Fasten Bra Straps"--now honestly, who would consider such a notion, to begin with?

SNORKY: [Incessant and incredible honking]

DROOPER, interpreting for Snorky: What Snorky was just saying just now was that such was bound to be likely for such roads moving forward ... even if it may sound rather silly, to begin with!

FLEEGLE: So what are we waiting for, Splits? Let's make a run for it, turn it loose even!

DROOPER: Still, do you remember that time when Coors Light had "Turn it Loose!" as an ad campaign, with the Spanish version translating back as "Suffer diarrhea"?

[Laughter breaks out amongst the Splits]

FLEEGLE: Seriously--LET'S MAKE A RUN FOR IT!!

[Engines revved up, the whole underway, replete with the usual clouds of dust and--well, let imagination suffice to complete the whole. Let's just hope the farmers aren't offended by all the ensuing dust and loud antics in the process.]

#vignette #hanna barbera #the banana splits #banana buggies #mininum maintenance road #remove dentures and fasten bra straps #off road #turn it loose #hannabarberaforever

[sohannabarberaesque]

Meanwhile, with the Hair Bears' legendary Invisible Motorcycle "out in the country" somewhere--

[And it turns out our motley trio of ursine cut-ups comes across a sign at the start of a relatively obscure gravel road now considered one of the Mininum Maintenance Sort, and we find--]

SQUARE BEAR, noticing the appendage at the bottom of the aforementioned sign: "Remove Dentures and Fasten Bra Straps" ... and you wonder why that would be?

BUBI BEAR, inevitably getting ahead of himself as per usual in the circumstances: And who could just imagine the clyde when the woman's bra straps aren't fastened beforehand heading into this--

[Square Bear puts his forepaw over Bubi's mouth, sensing that he might be taking things a bit too far and borderline vulgar.]

SQUARE BEAR, rather doltish like: What exactly was Bubi saying?

HAIR BEAR: Look, since this is an Invisible Motorcycle, I don't think there should be an issue with the road ahead being rough, to begin with!

SQUARE BEAR: Well, invisible or not, let's go for it anyway ...

#vignette #hanna barbera #hair bear bunch #the invisible motorcycle #mininum maintenance roads #remove dentures and fasten bra straps #40 miles of bad road #hannabarberaforever

[sohannabarberaesque]

So we find The Mystery Machine somewhere on a desolate country road and--

[Our Crew finds a sign just as the road in question begins--]

VELMA DINKLEY, reading said sign in her somewhat stentorian sort of tone: "Mininum Maintenance Road--Travel At Your Own Risk--Remove Dentures and Fasten Bra Straps."

FREDDIE JONES and DAPHNE BLAKE: [Stunned gasp, followed by their repeating that "Remove Dentures and Fasten Bra Straps" bit incredulously]

SCOOBY-DOO: "Rrrove rentures rnd rasten rra rraps"?

NORVILLE "SHAGGY" ROGERS, munching away on some multi-grain tortilla chips: Heh, like, I don't think we have much of a mystery to begin with here, come to think of it!

DAPHNE BLAKE, getting her quarter in: The point of which is well worth seconding ... after all, with fewer farmers likely using such roads to begin with, is it not obvious to cut back on maintenance to a bare mininum?

VELMA DINKLEY, with obvious sarcasm: Enough so as to prompt such a warning as "Remove Dentures and Fasten Bra Straps" in the process....

#vignette #hanna barbera #scooby doo #mininum maintenance road #remove dentures and fasten bra straps #hannabarberaforever