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brightlotusmoon · 4 years

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Me, trying to explain how I'm autistic to someone with an autistic kid who thinks he might be autistic so I was trying to be simplistic:

Yes, the scholarly side of autistic advocates have linked it to genetics. Environmental cofactors are still being studied. But it's really just our developing brains rewiring into a more sensory oriented neurotype. Autistics have a lot more sensory neurons all over, it's been found. We're like Linux in a Mac world, to use a popular analogy. And we get quickly overloaded with a deeper synesthetic reaction to both external and internal stimuli, thus the functioning labels given to us are much too arbitrary. Our spectrum isn't a line, it's a Mobius strip. A color wheel. A sundae bar.

Like... my support needs are low for the most part, but that doesn't mean my functioning levels are high. It doesn't mean my autism is mild or slight. It means that neurotypical society sees my autism as "less disruptive" overall.

For example, I headcanon all four Ninja Turtles as autistic in four different ways. We know how unique they each are. And they each display a comorbidity or two, like Mikey's ADHD. I'd say they all have PTSD, just imagine Donnie's though. And Raphael has multiple anxiety disorders, alexithymia, emotional dysregulation. But for years and years, I didn't know those terms fifteen years ago, even ten.

TMNT History Time! Back in the 2000s after the 2003 show came out, Aspergers became noticed and the fandom decided that Donatello had it. Some folks also knew that Michelangelo had undiagnosed ADHD, but ADHD was being demonized at the time and many fans didn't like that Mikey was "the poster boy." And others suspected that Mikey had it but they stereotyped him and exaggerated his loud obnoxious immaturity.

I had just been diagnosed ADHD back then, just before 2003, also with dyscalculia that nobody understood. And I was also a young adult undiagnosed autistic. I'd also been born with what the doctors called 'mild' spastic cerebral palsy that was seen as Not So Bad because I didn't look like a stereotype. And because of all that, I had very strong Feelings about Don and Mike, for me it was a big deal, seeing different parts of myself in both turtles.

History within History! During that time, Autism Speaks was founded and quickly became disliked by the majority of autistic activists as they advertised and cemented the vicious ideas that autism was a terrible burden that made people want to kill their children, that autistic people weren't fully human, in fact 'the least us' and likened to lepers according to the founders of Autism Speaks, that autistic kids weren't full human people unless they had ABA and were physically abused and emotionally gaslit into conforming, even in modern ABA which encourages manipulating autistics into being happy, the core of the ABA therapy concept.

Now, by that point, my mentors had coined terms like 'neurodivergence' to identify individuals versus neurodiversity as a group - they had previously coined 'cousin neurologies' to connect the comorbidities between autism and ADHD and other conditions. Autism Speaks began plagiazing their online essays, editing them to leave out important parts, because the autistic authors talked about being fine the way they were, talking about not needing a cure.

Then, Autism Speaks began promoting eugenics. And afterwards it was decided that Aspergers, which came out of the eugenics programs from WWII, would be merged into the autism spectrum in the USA, which felt right as more research showed how autism was not so much a disability or disorder by itself as it was a whole brainbody wiring down to cellular structure, a collective of traits, skills, syndromes, strengths and weaknesses, which could be disabilities and skill sets alike.

An entire movement within the advocate community began that started looking at fictional characters who could be autistic or ADHD or both. Kids and adults would be able to relate.

And now, fandoms are actively creating original characters with autistic traits, with ADHD, by actual autistic fans or allies who closely research the neurologies. I didn't have anything like that when I was young.

I didn't have the words, not even labels to defend from people who.now roll their eyes claiming "labels are for soup cans" and "we don't do labels" - also, PS, in order to say you don't do labels you first need to be able to know what labels you could have and be able to make a choice in having labels, and I didn't even have that - so I love having such a choice.

And you will have to put up with me writing fiction about autistic ADHD pansexual demisexual characters who are psionic. See, having been born with brain damage and cerebral palsy, I really wanted to be Jean Grey so I could have telekinesis) and I once wrote an unfinished crossover between X-Men and Ninja Turtles where 2003 Mikey gained the power of The Phoenix and later a Supernatural crossover where Mikey and Sam became friends.

TLDR, there's a lot of flavors of being autistic.

#being autistic #actually autistic #autistic community #autistic positivity #autistic experiences #autism and adhd are cousins #autism is my identity #functioning labels are arbitrary bullshit #autism is not hot sauce #autism is not an accessory #aspergers is autism #this is why i argue with autism moms #adhd is exempt from allistic fuckery #fuck aba #i created this tumblr because of michelangelo #tmnt is my hyperfocus #tmnt is my autistic special interest #tmnt is forever changing #michelangelo is my hyperfixation #neuropsychology of michelangelo #michelangelo is adhd and autistic like me #tmnt michelangelo #the neuropsychology of michelangelo #thesis #donatello is autistic obviously but so is michelangelo #donatello the wild scientist #donatello is a precious geek and he adores mikey #i'm married to a mikey and donnie type anyway #self reflection

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