#i dont evne know what im saying anymore i am just so bored | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jockedguy · 5 years

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I wasnt always a Grunt. I never imagined I would be, I dont know how you can ever see somethin like that coming. I wish I had seen it earlier, because of how happy I am now.

All I have tosay is that I am in a crew, I have a Boss and I have a Chief. They give me orders and I do them because thats what Grunts do. Grunts are Crew Property.

Im what most people would call a Redneck. Even though I live in the city, my Boss and my Chief want me to be a sertain way. Its not good for me to make choices, because I always fuck it up. Its way easier to do what Im told.

Its been a slow process but in the last few months Its been goin faster. Now I wear a lot more leather and we branewash every night, wich is important to me because branewashin is good for me. Theres times when I kinda fall back into who I used to be, because I lived it for so long, but Chief and Boss always remind me that aint who I am anymore. People change, its not so wierd that Im who I am now. Its kinda always who I’ve been anyway underneath. Bossn Chief just help bring it out.

I never relax as good as when Im branewashin. I love hearin the leather creakin n shit when Boss puts me in the chanes and the coller. I love gettin a lil tripped out when the spirals come on the big screan. And all the pics, some of em even look like me. Or I look like them or somethin. Ether way, Its good for me.

Ive always liked dogs, but Im not sure why. Maybe cuz I just never liked cats, cuz they were kinda stupid and smelled bad. A good dog is a good frend, he always hangs out with you and licks your face and rolls around and is a good time. Thats what Im kinda like to my Boss n Chief as a Grunt, cuz Grunts is crew property. Im loyal as fuck and Ill fuck anyone up who trys to fuck with Boss or Chief. Like a dog too. I got a big ass wolf tatted on my arm an hes howlin, it looks badass. I got it cuz Boss told me to get it. Boss knows best.

Someday Boss tells me we wont be in the city anymore, itll be on big land probably in the South and ill work the land. Boss sez its okay that Im more like his employee. He marryed me because its the best way to own me. Theres even a contract that makes me like legaly owned by Boss n Chief. I signed it but I dont remember much about it cuz the words were really fuckin big and I got bored plus Chief said just sign it Grunt so i signed it Grunt and he wacked me on the head and said now he had to make a new one becuz I had to sign my REAL name but i forgot i had one.

Oh yea its Critter, I said when I remembered.

Boss and Chief laughed alot, then Boss took out my wallet from my pants and showed me my drivers ID and it said TUCKER JOHN PRICE.

So thats the name Im suposed to sign on the thing, Chief sez, and I think I get it, but now we gotta wait til he gets a new contract made up.

This is why I gotta dont think for myself, because like Boss n Chief say, its bad for me. I dont think, Boss n Chief think for me.

Slowly the way I think is changeing too. Every once in awhile Ill get a good brite flash of the way Im should be thinkin, slow n simple. Sometimes Ill realize that I wasnt even thinkin at all for a long time, jus kinda zonin out. Sometimes I wake up and Im all in leather and Im watchin the pics go by, all the spirals n shit. Sometimes Ieven think I see myself in those pics, but its goes by so fast that I cant tell.

Sometimes I dream Im in the yard, Im in the future, I feel the sun beatin down on my back and I see I got a shovel in my hand, Im doin some yardwork. I know my trailer aint too far away, and I know I got a shit ton of Coors Lite in the mini frige out there. Theres a piece of wood with the words CRITTERS PLACE painted on it that I did, hangin over the door. The Big House is behind me, and the Branewashin Room is downstairs, with the big screans and the chair with all the yellow straps and chanes. I can still taste the powedery pill that Boss gave me to eat before I sat down in it and can still feel the leather hood that he put over my face on my face now.

Soon we are goin to the South to see Chief. Chief sees me evry day tho, becauze they put a camera in my room. Crew Property gets wached by the higherups. I gotta do good cuz they allways wachin. Chief sez that when I get there Im gonna get more ink. Boss been sayin that he wants me to get a noes ring. That Im a Tattooed Low Life Leather Lovin Freak Dirty Fuckin Redneck, and I should act like it more, act like it better. He sez that if I dont shape up, Im gonna be wearin that muzzle alot more.

Sumtimes it feels a lil wierd, but I gotta remember that im a Grunt, im Crew Property. Even if I feel like maybe once bfore I was Smart or sumthin, even then I wasnt as Smart as Boss n Chief. Definly not now. Im such a good grunt that I even feel like I need to be punnished allot becuz of how often I let myself think im Smart like Boss n Chief. Cant see that on the camra so I gotta say it out loud.

Chief sez my believes will change eventualy. He sez Ive come so far. Boss sez Im a new person. I just know im Grunt, im Crew Property. I dont make choses cuz it hurts my brane. Thats why I need branewashin so that my brane can stop hurtin cuz I gotta think durin the day. I beleve what Chief sez and what Boss sez becuz they havent ben rong yet. Im sure Ill change evn more to what they want becuz Im a Grunt and Im Crew Property, and soon itll be on a contract as soon as I dont fuck it up on the paper.

#jockedguystories

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