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Disuphere (An AU Fosters family fic) Chapter 40

CHAPTER 40

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Missing: 2 years, 6 months and 23 days

“I wrote about you in school today. No real stuff. I say you’re my cousin and we hang out,” Josh said as he pressed his back to the other side of the pole. Jacob’s chains dug in. It really smelled Down Here. Josh was shocked that He hadn’t let Jacob shower yet.

Jacob wanted to not talk today. His eyes were blank. His face was purple from a bruise. The rest of him was hurt bad, too. He didn’t even want to eat today. But he was listening.

Because when Josh taught him how to write a word with his leg, Jacob started moving his under the towel.

Josh spelled Mom and Mama and Mariana and even Brandon, just for practice. In the distance, Josh thought he heard a car drive up. He hurried to get rid of the towel. To get Jacob looking like he had when Josh found him.

Even though he was glad Jacob was getting better at disappearing, Josh didn’t like to do the tape and the hood when he was like that.

“Bro? Are you in there? It’s Josh. I gotta do this,” he whispered urgently. “I love you. Stay alive, okay?”

The voice was faint, but it was there:

“Okay.”

Tape.

Hood.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Missing: 2 years, 7 months and 14 days

When Josh asked about when Jacob was going to get to go to school, He laughed. Then, He backhanded Josh so hard that he flew across the room.

“You must think I’m an idiot…” He sneered. “Like I’d risk sending you two dumbasses to the same school. I mean, I get why nobody notices you, but that one’s still got the face and the eyes. Hasn’t lost the pathetic look yet. Nope. He’s on the pole until I decide otherwise. Now get your ass over here. You gotta give me something to pay me back for your total stupidity.”

Josh stood and let it happen. The living room was different. Josh focused on the wall. On Cookie Land, where he hadn’t needed to go nearly as much since Jacob got here.

He went to work late, but He did go, which meant Josh could sneak down and check on Jacob. He smuggled down some Pop-Tarts and grape soda this time. (Always better to go with leftovers from his own lunch than to raise suspicion by having extra food go missing around The House.)

Josh fed Jacob Pop-Tarts and soda, even though Jacob said he didn’t want them.

“You do, too, want them. You can’t stay alive without food.”

“Why bother?” Jacob asked. “I’m never getting out of here.”

“Listen, I never told you this...but my mom...she’s a cop,” Josh said seriously.

“Really?” Jacob asked, a little interested, finally.

“If anybody can find us, she can,” Josh said firmly. “And plus? He literally just told me this. He’s afraid people will recognize you.”

“Great, so I’m in more danger....” Jacob mumbled.

“No. He’s afraid. He says all the time being afraid makes us dumber, right? So, all we have to do is wait.”

“For what?” Jacob asked, a little curious.

“For Him to make a mistake.”

Monday, May 10, 2010

Missing: 2 years, 8 months and 3 days

“What day is it?” Jacob asked, as soon as the tape was off. It was a thing he did now that he was feeling a little better about life. (The idea of Him making a mistake had made Jacob’s eyes seem brighter.)

“May 10th, 2010,” Josh reported. (Jacob liked it when he included the year.)

“My birthday,” Jacob breathed.

“No way…” Josh said, shocked, feeding Jacob bites of his peanut butter sandwich. “Mine’s next week.”

Jacob inhaled the rest of the sandwich, and looked confused. “I thought your birthday was in March? He took you to that stupid movie, right?”

“That’s my fake birthday. The one He gave me. My real one’s May 17th. You’re turning twelve, too?”

“I’m twelve today,” Jacob said, stunned. Glancing down at the dirty towel covering him and the chains, he shook his head. “I’m twelve and I’m stuck here.”

“Well, then we have to celebrate. We know He’s not gonna do anything special. Nothing you actually want, anyway. Hold on. I got an idea!”

“Stay alive!” Jacob called at Josh’s back. “Josh! Stay alive!”

Josh couldn’t help it. He grinned. “Not yet, but yeah, of course. Stay-alive-love-you-bro. Now do you want your present or not?’

“I’ll get in trouble. He won’t let me keep anything.”

“Dude. He’s not gonna take it away. He’s not gonna see it. We’re gonna eat it before that happens.”

Before Jacob could protest again, Josh booked it upstairs and looked in the cupboard, where he knew all His secret snacks were. There were so many, there was no way He would miss the twin chocolate Hostess cupcakes. Josh crammed the package in his shirt pocket and closed the box and the cupboard. Then he gave The House a careful once-over before going back downstairs.

“Happy birthday,” Josh said, whipping the cupcakes out of his shirt.

Jacob’s eyes lit up for real.

“Not exactly birthday cake, but…” Josh apologized, unwrapping the first cake and offering it for Jacob to eat.

“No…” Jacob’s words were muffled as he tried to talk around the chocolate. “It counts! I say it counts!”

Josh offered the other, and to his surprise, Jacob shook his head. He was getting to look sick-skinny, not in the position to turn down food.

“No. We share. That one’s yours. For your birthday. I can’t get you a present so...” he nodded.

Josh blinked. He had gotten to go to a movie. Had popcorn. A soda. It wasn’t a movie he’d liked and it definitely wasn’t with a person he liked but it was so much more than one cupcake chained in a basement.

“I had a birthday already....” Josh argued.

“Yeah, but that was your fake birthday. This is for your real birthday,” Jacob said, certain.

So even though he felt awful about it, Josh ate the cupcake. And he thought. When the cupcake was gone (in two seconds), Josh asked:

“If you could have anything for your birthday, what would you want?” (Josh had given Jacob what Josh thought he’d wanted, but the truth was, he really didn’t know what Jacob wanted.)

Jacob thought for a while. “I’d want to get a message to my mom,” he said, finally.

Josh pulled a pen and a notebook (Science - He would never look there) out of his backpack and opened to a blank page in the back:

“What would you say?” Josh asked seriously. “I’ll write it down and keep it safe. Then, when He makes His mistake, I’ll give it back to you, so you can give it to her.”

Jacob swallowed. A tear escaped and then another. He really did feel stuff super deep.

When he started to speak, Josh was ready. He wrote:

Dear Mom,

It’s me. How are you? I miss you a lot and I think about you every day. I think the day might be coming soon when I can go home. My friend, Josh, is helping me write this letter, so that’s why the handwriting looks different. Josh also keeps asking me how to spell words because he says he wants it to really look like I wrote it and you know I am a good speller. Anyway, I want you to know I’m doing okay. Josh is here, so I’m not alone. He looks out for me. So, please don’t worry. I love you more than anything ever.

Your son,

“Isaac?” Josh asked.

“Yeah. That’s my real name.”

“Oh.” Josh said.

“What’s yours?”

(Cold. Click. Black.)

“Josh?” Jacob was calling. “I said it’s okay. You don’t have to tell me.”

“He’ll shoot me if I say it again,” Josh admitted, his voice blank and heavy.

“Then don’t,” Jacob insisted.

Josh breathed. Tried to focus. To come back from whatever level he was on. But being Down Here was so hard. The smell alone made him want to gag. He was surprised Jacob could stand it.

He met Josh’s eyes with a steely determination. “If I don’t get out of here...I need you to give that letter to my mom.”

“We both will get out,” Josh said fiercely.

“Okay but if I don’t. Promise me you’ll do it. Please, Josh. You’re the only one who can.” (Josh hated to even think it, but He was right. Jacob had those eyes. Eyes that made you agree. That made you act.)

“Yeah, okay, I promise. But no matter what? If I get out, you’ll get out. And if you get out, I’ll get out,” Josh said. “No matter what happens, we’ll be with each other.”

Jacob nodded. “Hey, He seemed a little weird today. Maybe you should leave early? Just to be safe? And take the wrapper.”

“Right,” Josh shoved it in his shirt pocket. He hesitated at the towel. “The least He could do is let you wear some damn clothes…”

“Doesn’t matter,” Jacob lifted his chin. (He doesn’t think he’s strong, Josh thought, but he is. Stronger than me.)

“Hey. Keep an eye out for that mistake, okay? I love you, bro.” Josh held the tape in his hand an extra second. They weren’t done. “I’m so sorry I keep doing this, but I don’t want Him to see anything different. To hurt you worse.”

“I get it. Love you, too, bro. Thanks for my birthday.”

Josh nodded, swallowing a lump in his throat. “Stay alive?” he asked.

“Stay alive,” Jacob echoed, his eyes shining.

Tape.

Hood.

Lights out.

No keys.

No boots.

But He came home twenty minutes later - four hours early - with a stomachache.

It was a good thing Josh listened.

#fic: disuphere #fosters fic

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