#i probably should have refrained from re-reading huge chunks of all of them

[o0o-chibaken-o0o]

Hello love, could you rec me your favourite 8th year fics on ao3?

Hello yourself! YES, I can absolutely do this and honestly I feel like I’ve been waiting for this moment my entire life. I am OBSESSED with 8th year fics and I hope I can recommend at least a few you haven’t read already! :)

*warning*: This is an Extremely Long List. It is in literally no order because I love all of these fics so much it is as if they are my own children and I couldn’t possibly rank them

Unexpected Consequences by Lauren3210 (39K)- Harry was going back to school. He was going to play Quidditch, sleep in lessons, hang out with his friends, and generally just enjoy being a kid for a change. And he was also going to do it while being bonded with Malfoy, because apparently life was just going to continue throwing curveballs at him. Harry didn’t know why he expected anything different.This is one of the first fics I ever read and I still remember it clearly; it was THAT good! As an alternative to Azkaban, Draco is allowed to attend Hogwarts provided he agrees to a bond with Harry that makes him to do whatever Harry says. Naturally, once the feelings start this causes a lot of worrying and angst and klsfhd it’s just really really good! Also did I mention they share a private room? I know I can’t be the only one who lives for that.

Right Hand Red by lumosed_quill (73K)- Harry felt Malfoy’s breath on his lips as they came together over the bottle, hands firmly planted on the floor as though they each needed their familiar soil, refusing to cross into enemy territory. Except that Malfoy no longer felt like his enemy. Malfoy felt inevitable.Another of the first ever fics I read (and reread!) and MAN IS IT FUCKING AMAZING. The lust starts right from the beginning and there are *lots* of party games and a secret relationship and sweet moments and teaching of patronus charms and *sigh* I just want to go read it again right now!

Lumos by birdsofshore (41.5K)- Harry never expected to spend eighth year listening to Draco Malfoy wanking.FABULOUS fic in which they are roommates and then Draco wanks and then Harry wanks and then Draco and Harry wank at the same time, and then there are feelings!! A thousand times yes.

Strange Bathfellows by Bixgirl1 (27.5K)- It started with a bath. Or a potions accident. Or maybe it started before that, but who can tell anymore.Featuring: Uncomfortable wanking, more comfortable wanking, mutual wanking, bath sharing, inappropriate betting, secret shagging, those secrets at Hogwarts that everyone knows, and oblivious Harry who knows one thing: he’s falling in love.Harry and Draco being forced to share a bath is everything I never knew I needed until I was blessed enough to find this fic. @bixgirl1 has MANY truly ✨FABULOUS✨ eighth year fics (for example Instruction for a Misplaced Slytherin (8.5K) in which Draco teaches Harry about sex and In Evidence of Magical Theory (43.5K), which features forced bonding) and you should definitely read them all, but Strange Bathfellows remains my favorite! :)

He Was He and I Was Bunny by bryoneybrynn (37.5K)- The war is over and “eighth year” is about to begin at Hogwarts. But for Harry and Draco, nothing is quite the same. Harry’s looking for an escape, Draco’s looking for a friend. Does a little black bunny hold the answers for both of our boys?This fic combines two of my favorite tropes: eighth year and animagus transformations! And just… Harry is a freaking bunny??? A bunny who Draco pets and loves and OMG I’m melting just thinking about it.

Tug-O-Want by dysonrules (16.5K)- Harry is back at Hogwarts minding his own business when he finds himself magically drawn to Draco Malfoy. Over and over again.*Something* is making Harry feel a tug that keeps leading him to Draco and I don’t want to spoil anything but honestly isn’t that enough for you to be already hooked???

Don’t Think Twice (series) by firethesound (all together 28.5K)- Harry was just trying to get away for a while. He didn’t mean to get trapped in the Prefect’s Bath with Draco Malfoy.Were you perhaps interested in some porn, anon? Because this series is INCREDIBLY hot! Harry, under the invisibility cloak, finds himself trapped with Draco, who is doing some very interesting and compelling things to himself with a very interesting and compelling object. Unfortunately, the series is incomplete and last updated in 2014 but (and keep in mind I usually can’t stand reading WIPs) it’s totally worth the read anyway because PORN guys, PORN

How to Handle an Enemy and Turnabout is Fair Play by who_la_hoop  (18.5K)- Everyone knows that it’s no fun playing truth or dare with a Slytherin. But add a little Veritaserum, a scheming duo of Slytherin girls and surprising things can be revealed. Particularly about the fine line between love and hate…MORE PORN, and honestly some of the hottest I’ve ever read (and quite kinky!). I remember exactly where I was the moment I realized that I probably should have saved this one for when I was not in such a very public place. And as a bonus (ha), there’s plot too!! It is just oh-so-delicious! And the sequel is just as good! Again though, the series is not technically complete. But while I would be overjoyed to see another sequel someday, the two works stand well on their own and shouldn’t leave you unsatisfied at all! (Also I just reread them both while making this list because I couldn’t stop myself and they’re also super funny???? And just? great????)Also I should note that who_la_hoop is one of my all-time favorite writers and I already mentioned Written on the Heart (in which Draco has a soul mark with Harry’s name) in my angst-with-a-happy-ending list. It is also eighth year! And there are more great eighth year fics by her, read them allllll!

At the End of the Day by sara_holmes (7.5K)- No brooms, a distinct lack of balls, no comprehension of the offside rule and a Malfoy who apparently has magic feet. Harry never knew this stupid game could be so much fun.This is a short, really lovely fic that stands out to me because of its plot being so different from that of most eighth-year fics! In a good way though, because who doesn’t love a bit of Harry watching Draco be really really good at football?? Shirts vs skins anybody? ;)Also I already recced Mental by sara_holmes in my slow-burn rec list, but it absolutely deserves mention here too because it is one of my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE eighth year fics of all time! Also Get Some (link to google drive) which is not on AO3, but which IS absolutely fucking brilliant! Harry is drawn to Draco because he’s the only one after the war who refuses to put up with Harry’s shit.

Let Me Be Your Voice by Queenie_Mab (47.5K)- As the hero of the revolution, Harry leads the wizarding world in its efforts to rebuild; but first old wounds must be tended, rifts caused by hate mended, and his history with Draco Malfoy seems like the perfect place to start.This fic is great. First Harry finds a very *ahem* interesting use for Draco’s wand. And then when they get to school Draco isn’t talking for some reason (ooo intrigue!), and Harry is Very Concerned. Plenty of UST, some hurt/comfort, some kink, just really great!

Don’t mind if I keep your tie (and your heart, babe) by Ingi (21.5K)- The Eighth year common room has a parrot in it, courtesy of McGonagall and her mad search for interhouse bonding.Most of the time, it’s just there, until one day it repeats “Potter has a damn fine arse.” And the Slytherins know exactly who the parrot’s mimicking…Draco is not amused.All of the eighth years are sharing a common room with a literal parrot. Need I really say more?

Good Company by Greenflares (8K)- With Hermione and Ron always together, Harry’s return to Hogwarts to complete his education isn’t exactly fun. Somehow, it’s his unlikely friendship with Malfoy that keeps him sane.This fic is pretty short, but something about it made me absolutely fall in love and fangirl all over it for days! I wanted to read it again immediately upon finishing! For some inexplicable reason it also gave me this sense of nostalgia for High School and falling in love as a teenager, which I was alllll about. Definitely read this one if you haven’t.

Love Comes Tumbling by taradiane (22K)- ‘Harry’s thoughts were of how much he would have done differently with Malfoy over the years, and of Dumbledore’s final words to the other boy … “It is my mercy, and not yours, that matters now.” Maybe, Harry wondered, he could find some mercy, too, and give Malfoy the second chance that Dumbledore had believed him worthy of.’Basically Draco is being ostracized, and Harry notices and wants to help. Ron and especially Hermione are not very understanding, but Harry doesn’t let that stop him from befriending Draco! There is some angst, and slow-burn, and the Room of Requirement and coming out and…just yes!

1,000 Points From Gryffindor by blithelybonny (25K)- The story of how Harry Potter single-handedly lost Gryffindor the House Cup while attempting to have a “normal” year at Hogwarts. Featuring Harry’s suspicious nature turned up to eleven again, a new DADA teacher who is so not here for Harry’s fame, multiple detentions, Slytherins being sneaky, Hufflepuffs being sneakier, and the mystery of Draco Malfoy’s hoodie because seriously Hermione who gave that to him and is he wearing it just to torment me? This is ridiculous!AAGH DRACO MALFOY IS WEARING A HUFFLEPUFF HOODIE???!?!? Does this idea intrigue you as much as it does Harry?? Don’t you just NEED to know WHY?? If you want to solve this particular mystery you’ll just have to read this amazing fic!

In Your Arms, Rests My World by loveglowsinthedark (24K)- Harry presses his mouth to Malfoy’s forehead; he wants to tell him that he’ll never leave, that he wouldn’t dream of it.“You make me feel safe, Potter” Malfoy whispers. “You keep me safe.”UGH THIS FIC! I honestly should have recced this one on the heavy angst with a happy ending list because it is SO ANGSTY there is the middle and I HATED IT and I HATE @l0vegl0wsinthedark FOR DOING IT TO ME (read: amazing, beautifully written fic with tons of feels and I was SO SO invested and I loved it so much; go read it ASAP so you can cry with me). Tip: while reading, keep in mind that there is a super fluffy short sequel that will soothe all of your pain! Warning for rape (not h/d).

The Owl Who Came for Christmas by dracogotgame (17.5K)- Draco has a debt to pay off, no matter what Potter thinks. And he has a Very Good Idea to go along with it. Things don’t go as planned.OMGGGG Draco is an animagus and guess what he becomes?! Srsly, guess!!! Okay, I’ll tell you. An OWL, a lovely fucking OWL who delivers very sweet presents to Harry and eilwryudksj it’s just so cute and lovely and sweet!!

Also I just want to recommend every single eighth-year fic by Faithwood, who is in my opinion the queen of fluff (and often fluffy smut)! If you sort eighth-year HD fics by kudos on AO3, hers make up about half of the front page so OBVIOUSLY they are all required reading! 

And lastly(!!) idk if this violates some sort of etiquette, but I thought I’d mention that I myself have written three fics, and they are all eighth year! Unbearable is really short and fluffy and about Draco being dared to kiss Harry, All You Want for Christmas is Me features Draco wearing nothing but a big red ribbon, and His Little Something is basically a bunch of Harry failing to resist slutty Draco and me indulging my HUGE (heh) love of size kink. And…I think they’re…good? I hope? Read them and let me know?? ;D

Wow this became SO LONG and yet there are still about a billion other eighth year fics that I could rec! But I’ll stop here and keep this list mildly readable :D ENJOY!! 😁😁😁

#omg this took me literally five hours to make #i probably should have refrained from re-reading huge chunks of all of them #but can you blame me? #they're all just so good! #rec list #drarry #drarry recs #drarry fanfic #hogwarts eighth year #eighth year drarry #chibarecs

[longsightmyth]

Myth reads The Riddle, Chapter 1

Alrighty, folks. I can’t to a direct book-to-book comparison (there are seven ToG novels not including The Assassin’s Blade, which is a collection of five prequel novellas, and only five Pellinor books including the prequel novel) so I made a spreadsheet to figure out what should be read with what. The Riddle gets to be compared to Crown of Midnight, Heir of Fire, and a not insignificant amount of Queen of Shadows. The Crow gets the rest of Queen of Shadows, the entirety of Empire of Storms (Hem doesn’t deserve that but them’s the breaks), and a good chunk of Tower of Dawn. The Singing has the rest of Tower of Dawn and all of Kingdom of Ash, for which it has my sincere apologies.

The Bone Queen is going to be compared to The Assassin’s Blade on the premise that they are both prequels and that at some point I could use a break from doing anywhere from 40-90 pages at a time of ToG. I may do those two directly after The Riddle so I can have the aforementioned break.

I COULD, of course, read two books for every Pellinor book except the Bone Queen, which would still be read only with The Assassin’s Blade, but a, I didn’t think of that until I was already done with my spreadsheet, and b, that would involve reading exactly 1.628 pages (Tower of Dawn and Kingdom of Ash) with The Singing, which is 444 pages. As various friends correctly pointed out, that sounds torturous (and comes out to about 4 pages of ToG for 1 page of The Singing). After that discussion, I decided my spreadsheet should not be in vain.

Here we go.

The Riddle, being the second of the Books of Pellinor

Chapter 1

The Riddle

Do not twine garlands of myrtle for my forehead Nor pluck sweet roses to adorn me Make me a crown of somber violets For I am dying

The sweet lips of the maidens of Busk And the flashing feet of dancing goatherds Will never again quicken my desire For I am dying

Come to me merciful Meripon In your ebony chariot drawn by swallows From the dim halls beyond the Gates For I am dying

I kiss the peaks of Lamedon with my eyes And the white arms of the passionate sea Which loves this beautiful island that I love For I am dying

Thus begins the first chapter of the first section of The Riddle, called Thorold.

Yikes.

Maerad has a dream vision of a lot of armies marching through a desert, and not even a cool natural desert. Something about it feels bad and poisoned. She freaks out and falls…

Maerad woke, gasping for breath, and sat bolt upright. This was an unwise thing to do, as she was sleeping in a hammock slung below the deck of a small fishing smack called the White Owl. The hammock swung dangerously and then, as she flailed for balance in the pitch dark, tipped her out onto the floor. Still trapped in her dream, Maerad screamed, putting out her hands to break her fall, and hit the wooden floorboards.

Cadvan of course rushes to check on her. Maerad says she had a bad dream and apologizes if she cried out. Cadvan jokes that it sounded like there was a hull on the boat and asks if it was a regular nightmare or a foredream. Maerad says definitely foredream, definitely horrible, also she is not a fan of boats because she gets seasick.

Foredreams, in Maerad’s experience, we always horrible.

Cadvan, when Maerad tells him about it, says it definitely sounds like the place the Nameless One started out from when he marshalled his armies to bring about the Great Silence. Maerad asks hopefully if maybe she’s just seeing the past, and Cadvan says there’s always the possibility but he doesn’t think so in this case, because Cadvan is a negative nancy.

Maerad gives us some ‘last time on’ info while she and Cadvan consider the implications, including that Turbansk, Saliman’s Bard school and where he and Hem went, are going to have it rough.

“...even that vast force is only one piece in the great strategem the Nameless One is now unleashing. And you, Maerad, are as significant to him as that huge army. Maybe more so. Everything turns on you.”

Maerad bowed her head, oppressed beyond measure by Cadvan’s words. On me? she thought bitterly. And yet she knew it was true.

Cadvan, I don’t mean to criticize, but you seem to forget a lot that Maerad is a teenager who was pretty recently yoinked from slavery. Maybe, like. Chill for a second on the whole ‘the fate of the world is on Your Shoulders Alone’ thing? (It’s a different matter from how I feel that in ToG the books have forgotten that Celaena is a teenager pretty recently yoinked from slavery. If I fail to mention this in the comparison yell at me in the notes and I’ll talk about it)

More ‘last time on’ but I don’t mean it as a criticism: it manages to be couched into Maerad’s thoughts about Cadvan and her Foretold-ness, and honestly I feel like more books should have some ‘last time on’ thoughts when they’re sequels. If nothing else it would remind the authors themselves what happened in the last book.

Naming no names, re: sequel consistency (oh we’ll get to that)

They’re two days out from Busk, and Maerad, at a loss for anything else to do, offers to keep watch so Owan or Cadvan can nap, since they’re the only two who really know how to sail. They would have taught Maerad, but Cadvan has a magic wind still going, which makes teaching difficult, and when it’s not going he’s asleep and Owan is busy actually, you know. Sailing.

Maerad had already witnessed Cadvan’s powers of endurance, but his stubborn will impressed her anew: his face was haggard and his mouth grim, but he moved the with alertness of a well-rested man.

So many jokes I could make. I will refrain.

Maerad sees something in the water and alerts the other two. Cadvan tries to make them go faster but whatever it is keeps up.

It’s an ondril, which are usually pretty benign sea serpents. This one is big, they’ve already gotten out of whatever territory onril would normally defend, and they can’t see to outrun it.

Welp, says Cadvan (lightly paraphrased), guess we’re gonna have to fight. Let’s charge it.

Owan cocked his head and thought briefly. “Aye, easily enough, if you put more breeze in the sails,” he said. “Think you that’s a good idea?”

“I don’t,” Maerad said. “I think it’s mad.”

“We may be able to wrest the initiative,” said Cadvan. He looked at Maerad and smiled with a sudden sweetness that illuminated and transformed his somber face. “Come, Maerad. It is far better to put away fear than to be driven by it. You know that.”

Yes, I know that, Maerad thought sardonically. But I’m tired of having to be brave when really I’m so terrified I scarce know what to do.

He lets his wind die, has Owan turn them around, and whips of an opposite direction wind to charge the ondril. Maerad isn’t pleased but readies her sword and magic. Cadvan magically fastens Owan to the boat so he won’t get thrown out and gives age-old fighting advice: go for the eyes.

They do.

Anyway they have a battle, Maerad hits it with fire (some of which glances off), they run, the ondril pursues, both Maerad and Cadvan go for the remaining eye when it catches up, and they finally manage to escape. The men congratulate each other and Maerad.

Maerad looked away over the sea, feeling nothing but a vast emptiness. She had no sense of triumph, nor even relief. All she felt was a returning wisp of nausea. The only good thing about being frightened half to death, she thought, is that it makes me forget all about being seasick.

End chapter.

Throne of Glass

Are y’all ready for Crown of Midnight? I bet you aren’t!

Confession: this is the one I remember least, so we’re going on a journey together basically. I hope that comforts you as it has failed to comfort me. Anyway. Chapters 1-6 (and the first 51 pages) of CoM, here we come. (I also have to remind people that if I didn’t enjoy this on some level I wouldn’t be doing it: no one is forcing me. I’m just being dramatic)

Also can we discuss how I actually LIKE Crown of Midnight as a title, even if it’s pretty irrelevant to this book? Just saying.

We start with part 1, titled ‘The King’s Champion’ which is a departure from the first book, which was separated only by chapters. All subsequent books follow this format for reasons I don’t entirely understand, but we can talk about that in the comparison section, probably in more than one of these chapter/section comparisons.

Chapter 1!

Celaena sneaks into a house in a storm with many s words describing movement. She’s concealed in a black mask and hood, which is not a good way not to attract notice. Human-shaped splotches of solid black aren’t exactly blending in with the shadows (you’d want lots of different shades of brown and grey and black and yes even red, especially if there’s a lot of brick around. Fun fact: red is one of the first colors to register as grey to human eyes in the dark) and not exactly great for blending in with the crowd (unless that’s a new fashion in Rifthold?). She might have done better to disguise herself as a servant once she was in the house, or even to get in the house.

To give Celaena her due, she is trying to make An Impression on the dude she’s supposed to assassinate so he’ll take her seriously. To harp on my own pet peeve, making everyone around him less competent to make Celaena seem more badass is not the way to make a badass character (“the [servant] girl hadn’t noticed [Celaena’s] wet footprints on the floorboards,” really? She has to clean those floors. That girl is going to notice when they’re dirty).

We are two paragraphs into this book.

Anyway. I might also have to start counting uses of the word ‘wraith’.

Celaena notes that Lord Nirall’s wife is pretty and wonders what these nobles have done for the king to want them dead. Remind me to talk about Celaena’s weird compassion for high ranking Adarlan citizens vs everyone else in the world in the comparison.

She crept to the edge of the bed. It wasn’t her place to ask questions. Her job was to obey. Her freedom depended on it. With each step toward Lord Nirall, she ran through the plan again.

Her sword slid out of its sheath with barely a whine. She took a shuddering breath, bracing herself for what would come next.

Lord Nirall’s eyes flew open just as the King’s Champion raised her sword over her head.

Chapter 2!

Celaena’s walking down the hall to the king’s council chamber. I personally would have my assassin report to me in my study barring some really specific circumstances but I am but a young girl unschooled in the ways of politics and murder.

Also Rifthold is spelled Rift-hold for some reason. I assume it’s just a formatting error or typo.

Celaena bows to the king, notes Chaol and Dorian, and removes her hood when the king tells her to rise, which just makes these guards even more incompetent. You’re letting a hooded chick with a bloody sack just walk into the council chamber?

Wait why does the council chamber have the glass throne. Does the king just have multiple glass thrones? The glass throne has been mentioned all of once and it already has more impact in the book NOT named after it. Anyway.

Celaena produces a head (mauled unrecognizably) and seal ring, and then when the king asks about the guy’s wife she hauls a “slender, pale hand” wearing a wedding ring from the sack, saying that the wife is chained to the remains of her husband at the bottom of the sea. Dorian looks sick and Celaena decides she should give him credit for not throwing up.

The king says fine, and tells her that her next assignment is to root out and get rid of a growing rebel movement.

“There are several people on my list of suspected traitors, but I will only give you one name at a time. This castle is crawling with spies.”

Well that’s stupid on a scale rarely seen. You aren’t going to hand her a physical list, after all, that would be -

Chaol stiffened at [the comment about spies], but the king waved his hand and the captain approached her, his face still blank as he extended a piece of paper to Celaena.

- exactly what you’re doing. Okay.

Keeping her features neutral, she looked at the paper. On it was a single name: Archer Finn.

Celaena actually knows him - he trained for a bit with her, because he’s a courtesan and needed to be able to defend himself from his clients’ jealous husbands, apparently. No gay people in Rifthold, no siree. Celaena had a crush on him back in the day and she hasn’t seen him in several years.

“...she’d never thought him capable of something like this. He’d been handsome and kind and jovial, not a traitor to the crown so dangerous that the king would want him dead.”

Sounds like a perfect spy tbh.

Somehow despite Archer being a famous and highly sought-after courtesan, the king thinks it’s salacious that Celaena might know who he is. Then the king gives her a month to kill Archer or he’ll reconsider her position. When she’s killed Archer she’ll get the next name on the list.

Surely there isn’t an actual physical list somewhere of everyone the king considers a traitor. Surely he at least has it in code. Surely his spymaster has different bits of info kept different places or with different people. Surely he has a spymaster?

Leave me my hopes and dreams.

She had avoided the politics of the kingdoms - especially their rebel forces - for so many years, and now she was in the thick of it. Wonderful.

Ah. Sorry to mention this, but…

“We kill corrupt officials and adulterous spouses; we make it quick and clean…”

Maas, Sarah J.. The Assassin's Blade: The Throne of Glass Novellas (Throne Of Glass Series) (p. 41). Bloomsbury Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Killing corrupt politicians is not avoiding politics. I’m just saying.

The king tells her that her payment for killing Nirall is in her chambers. She pulls a salary and gets bonuses? Sweet gig. Aside from, you know, the murder.

She leaves the throne room, keeping the piece of paper with Archer’s name on it because this is Celaena we’re talking about, and we swap to Dorian’s PoV.

He’s worried because Celaena is killing people and not dressing up anymore and starts to think that maybe she just manipulated him into getting her the position of King’s Champion, which would make sense except for the fact that he pulled her out of the salt mines having never knowingly met her (and she doesn’t know they’ve met either: it’s a prequel thing) for the express purpose of making her King’s Champion, no seduction required.

Also, she’s an assassin who kills people for money. I am always surprised at how characters, knowing that fact, are surprised when she talks about killing people for money.

Dorian couldn’t bring himself to finish the thought. He’d visit her - tomorrow, perhaps. Just to see if there was a chance he was wrong.

But he couldn’t help wondering if he’d ever meant anything to Celaena at all.

Back to Celaena’s PoV!

She goes to the sewers to dump the body parts and Chaol follows her. She wonders why everyone seems shocked that she’s willing to murder people, which is the first and possibly only time Celaena considers that as far as I can recall.

Chaol gets mad at her for being unwilling to share her murder details because for some reason that links in to missing her? I guess bonding over working for the apparently murderous conquering dictator is one way to strengthen a relationship.

They hug because she realizes he was worried about her and we are reminded that Celaena is warm for Chaol’s form. He says she smells really bad. She complains that she wasn’t allowed to shower before going to see the king, which I will acknowledge is a fair thing to be peeved about.

Chaol walks her to her room and agrees to come back for dinner, after which Celaena gets fussed over by Philippa in summary and then ruminates on how she hadn’t actually killed Niral and his unnamed wife or the named first target (Sir Carlin). Apparently there are sick-houses that dump lots of bodies, so Celaena stole a couple that looked like the victims and slashed them up a little. Celaena thinks about how the pale and slender hand had come from a girl “barely past her first bleed” which marks the beginning of the interesting relationship these books have with menstrual cycles and somehow knowing if someone has them or not.

She tries to think of how she can fake Archer’s death and draws a blank because he’s so well-known (but somehow it was surprising that she knew who he was back in the throne room?), then that she still can’t believe he’s a rebel, then that she can’t think of what else the king could conquer unless he’s looking at the other continents.

There were other continents, of course. Other continents with wealthy kingdoms - like Wendlyn, that faraway land across the sea.

Celaena’s mother was literally from Wendlyn. It irks me that the book pretends she has no idea about the country.

Celaena thinks that if the king finds out what she’s up to he’ll destroy her.

Chapter 3!

Celaena has a nightmare where Cain and the ridderak chase her through the secret tunnels. Cain almost catches her and…

He whispered her name, her true name, and she screamed as he -

When the book acknowledges Celaena’s Super Secret Long Lost Heritage and when it doesn’t has never quite made sense to me, but here we are.

She wakes up, cuddles her dog, and goes back to sleep.

The next morning Celaena and Nehemia play fetch with Fleetfoot the dog who hates everyone and everything but Celaena per the text. Celaena considers that Nehemia is a spy but the king definitely can’t know about her or he wouldn’t trust Celaena to be his Champion.

Fleetfoot is apparently abnormally large, as a sidenote.

Nehemia wants Celaena to tell her anything Celaena figures out about the king’s plans, because Nehemia is a reasonably competent spy in enemy territory using every advantage. Celaena promises to do so but thinks that she won’t, actually, because the king promised if she worked against him he would murder Chaol, Nehemia, and Nehemia’s family one by one in that order, which is really the wrong order to go in if you’re an evil king bent on bending a mostly morally incompetent assassin to your will. You kill somebody just close enough to prove you’re serious first. You don’t give up your hostage grown princess or loyal captain of the guard until other options have exhausted themselves. The hostage crown princess keeps an entire country at bay. The loyal captain of the guard is a, loyal, and b, captain of the guard. Those are the people you get rid of when you’re just Over It. You won’t have anybody left to bargain with after you kill the people Celaena actually cares about.

Look if you’re going to write evil, calculating characters, make them evil and calculating. Moving on.

If Nehemia talked more about the rebels, [Celaena] didn’t know how much more of it she could take. Yes, she wanted to be free of the king - both as his Champion and as a child of a conquered nation - but she wanted nothing to do with whatever plots were brewing in Rifthold, and whatever desperate hope the rebels still savored. To stand against the king would be nothing but folly. They’d all be destroyed.

Nehemia talks about Calaculla, which is supposed to be a work camp even harsher than Endovier and reserved almost entirely for citizens of Eyllwe, and says that the king won’t meet with her to discuss the conditions there.

“Apparently, he’s too busy finding people for you to kill.”

Get her.

Nehemia calls Celaena Elentiya, which if you have forgotten means ‘spirit that could not be broken’ in the language of Eyllwe and which you might have REPRESSED that Nehemia gave to Celaena, possibly in a fairytale hope that if you name something you influence the nature of it.

Sorry, Nehemia. You tried.

Anyway she does that while demanding when they can actually act.

But when Celaena said nothing, when she promised nothing, just as she always did when Nehemia spoke about these things, the princess dropped the stick on the ground quietly and walked back to the castle.

Celaena thinks about how she has to go meet Chaol for a run in a few minutes and she’s going to go hang out in Rifthold afterwards.

After all, the king had given her a month, and despite her own questions for Archer, she wanted to get off the castle grounds for a bit. She had blood money to burn.

Chapter 4!

We start with Chaol’s PoV. He and Celaena are doing their morning run and it’s cold. He looks over at her.

Noticing his stare, she flashed him a grin, those stunning turquoise eyes filled with light.

I just wanted it noted for the record exactly how noticeable her family eyes (from her Wendlyn side) storied in song and legend are.

They tease each other and run faster. Chaol thinks about Cain and how he killed him and asks Celaena how often she thinks about the people she’s killed. She drags him to a stop and says he shouldn’t pass judgment on her before breakfast. In the book it’s not bantery, it just sounds that way in summary.

Chaol assures her he wasn’t judging, and when she asks if this is about Cain he says yes. Celaena launches into a speech about never forgetting the people she’s killed, which would be a lot more moving if we knew anything about the people she killed or if she actually, like, remembered them in her PoV. we don’t even know who the guy she killed when she was in the single digits (mentioned in ToG) was. This is what I mean by these books telling instead of showing. We’re in Celaena’s head for most of these books. We should know more things.

Celaena assures Chaol that what he did wasn’t dishonorable and that she’ll never forget he saved her. Chaol reflects silently that he doesn’t know who he’d chose if it came down to Celaena vs the king, which, uh. Really dude?

They run some more.

Celaena’s PoV!

They’re walking back to the palace through the gardens. It’s still really cold.There are lots of women out to ogle Chaol as he removes all his layers but his shirt. Celaena is irritated. Chaol offers to help her with surveillance on Archer, she says she doesn’t need help, and they run into Dorian and a blond young man.

Blond dude is Roland. He makes Celaena nervous, which I’m not actually going to make fun of. Sometimes dudes just give off unspecified Bad Vibes. Dorian introduces them.

They still used her alias whenever she couldn’t avoid running into members of the court, though most everyone knew to some degree that she was not in the palace for administrative nonsense or politics.

Administrative.

Nonsense.

Fine whatever.

Roland didn’t expect the King’s Champion to be so lovely, apparently. He’s here to take a position on the king’s council. Chaol gets grouchy. Roland ogles Celaena. Dorian breaks up the party.

Dorian’s PoV!

Roland comments that Celaena/Lillian is an unexpected choice even with the competition. Dorian hates him and remembers that time Chaol punched Roland in the face and knocked Roland unconscious. He says Roland deserved it but does not explain why, though apparently he deserved it enough that the entire court took Chaol’s side.

Roland asks some more questions. Dorian gives no answers and thinks about how Meah (where Roland is from) is a prosperous coastal city with no army and no political power, which makes me question everything. Also I wish the throwaway comment early about Celaena ‘killing’ a dude in Meah linked into Roland somehow, but that would mean this was a different book.

Celaena’s PoV!

Her salary as King’s Champion was considerable, and Celaena spent every last copper of it.

Where does all your money come from later if you spend it all? I guess we’ll talk more about that in Queen of Shadows.

She returns to her room to find Dorian waiting for her. They banter, mentioning Dorian’s flocks of ladies.

Actually, the thought of Dorian with other women made her want to shatter a window, but it wouldn’t be fair to let him know that.

Yikes.

Celaena says she has to head back out into Rifthold.

Dorian took a step closer, exposing his palms to her. “Do you want me to fight for you? Is that it?”

“No,” she said quietly. “I just want you to leave me alone.”

His eyes flickered with the words left unsaid. Celaena stared at him, unmoving, until he silently left.

Alone in the foyer, Celaena clenched and unclenched her fists, suddenly disgusted with all of the pretty packages on the table.

In a weird way, I think this might be one of the most telling passages about Celaena. When Nehemia tries to talk about helping people, Celaena goes shopping. When she reiterates to Dorian that she doesn’t want to date him, that is when she can’t stomach shopping.

It’s just interesting to me, is all.

Chapter 5!

Up on a rooftop reindeer paw, down jumps good old Celaena Sardothien.

Ahem.

On a rooftop in a very fashionable and respectable part of Rifthold, Celaena crouched in the shadow of a chimney and frowned into the chill wind gusting off the Avery.

She’s waiting for Archer to leave his current appointment. She remembers Sam Cortland and vague events from the prequel novellas, but not in any helpful manner. When Archer exits (apparently after two hours instead of the one his previous appointments took).

While she was in no hurry to seek out the truth behind her own capture and Sam’s death, and while she was fairly certain the king had to be wrong about Archer, part of her wondered whether whatever truth she uncovered about this rebel movement and the king’s plans would destroy her, too.

And not just destroy her - but also everything she’d grown to care about.

Later, Celaena and Chaol are chilling in his room (she notes that it’s one room with a bathroom, not the suite that she has). Celaena is studying Archer info. Chaol is presumably doing captain of the guard business, which should involve a lot of writing and accounting so at least that’s happening. Good for you, book.

Celaena learns that Wesley (Arobynn’s bodyguard) killed the crime lord who killed Sam. Arobynn apparently killed Wesley right afterwards.

Celaena ruminates on how Arobynn betrayed her and…

How much she’d make him suffer - and bleed for it.

Chaol asks why she cares, and she explains about Sam and being captured.

“I failed him,” she said. “In every way that counted, I failed him.”

Another long silence, then a sigh. “Not in one way,” Chaol said. “I bet he would have wanted you to survive - to live. So you didn’t fail him, not in that regard.”

I feel like it’s moments like these where my extreme disgust and disappointment in the way Celaena is handled as a character gets in the way. This would normally be a sentiment I’d be down with. It’s not terribly written. I just can’t make myself believe that Celaena really gave a damn about Sam.

It’s a problem.

Chaol opens up about his own romantic past, in which Roland stole his ladylove away and whisked her off to Meah, never to be seen again. I want to be clear that it wasn’t a kidnapping, it was Roland sleeping with Chaol’s girlfriend.

Look. Not to be all ‘ladies can’t make their own choices’ but I gotta say if the cousin of the current murderous dictatorial king was like ‘sleep with me’ I probably would out of fear for my own safety. The situation might not have been like that, but it kinda seems like that.

They banter. Chaol goes to walk Celaena back to her rooms and she asks if he’d do the same for Dorian or if he only does it for women. He doesn’t reeeaaally answer and walks her back.

Celaena tells him that if Lithaen (a wink and a nod towards Celaena’s secret identity in Queen of Glass) chose Roland over Chaol then Lithaen is ‘the greatest fool who ever lived.’

Please see above, re: consent being debateable.

Celaena is also grateful that Lithaen is gone.

Midnight! Celaena heads for the library, being unable to sleep. She plans to grab a book and hightail it back to her room unless there are still some fires lit in the library and I’d ask why she wasn’t reading one of the eighty zillion books she apparently bought earlier but I have been in the frame of mind where nothing you have works for your brain. It’s like with some people and clothes? But with books.

With the chill tonight, it was no surprise to see someone completely concealed by a black cloak, hood drawn over the face. But something about the figure standing between the open library doors made some ancient, primal part of her send a warning pulse so strong that she didn’t take another step.

It’s a librarian come to keep her away from the books. They know what’s going to happen when she brings her dog into the library and they know about those times when she was a kid and they figure out that she’s easily spooked by people in black cloaks.

I’m kidding. It’s creepy and evil and the Eye of Elena starts glowing to ward it off. Celaena closes her eyes.

When she opened her eyes, the amulet was dark, and the hooded creature was gone.

Not a trace, not even the sound of footsteps.

Celaena didn’t go into the library. Oh, no. She just walked quickly back to her rooms with as much dignity as she could muster. Though she kept telling herself that she had imagined it all, that it was some hallucination from too many hours awake, Celaena couldn’t stop hearing that cursed word again and again.

Plans.

Honestly I feel like that chapter should have just ended on ‘Celaena didn’t go into the library.’ It’s kind of funny but still conveys that the creature freaked her out.

Chapter 6!

Celaena is still walking back to her rooms in this chapter. I feel like that could have been better worded last chapter. She’s trying to rationalize still: reading is out of fashion, so maybe somebody was indulging in the middle of the night so nobody made fun of them.

Also it’s a lunar eclipse tonight.

Celaena decides to go see Elena in her tomb and sets off down the secret passageway. Celaena has scars from the Ridderak bite (“a ring of white scars punctured her palm and encircled her thumb”) that I don’t believe were mentioned before or are ever mentioned again. I could be wrong.

She reaches to open the door to the tomb and a bronze doorknocker shaped like a skull asks her if she’s going to knock. She freaks out and says the door knocker can’t really be talking because that would mean magic.

It was impossible - it should be impossible. Magic was gone, vanished from the land ten years ago, before it had even been outlawed by the king.

“Everything in the world is magic. Thank you ever so kindly for stating the obvious.”

She calmed her reeling mind long enough to say, “But magic doesn’t work anymore.”

“New magic doesn’t. But the king cannot erase old spells made with older powers - like the Wyrdmarks. Those ancient spells still hold; especially ones that imbue life.”

What the fuck ever, y’all. I give up on figuring out the magic vanished from the world stuff. Really it only vanished from this particular continent, too, you learn later. Does that mean it’s really only a forcefield? Does that mean water stops magic? Does the amount matter? Would a river stop magic? If you’re on a boat in Erilea, can you do spells?

No answer. Well, I live in hope, as the priest said to the princess (thank you Tamora Pierce for that saying, which I have used since I was seven)

The door knocker is annoying. Celaena is annoying. Their banter is annoying. I think reading 50 pages of this at a time is messing with whatever objectivity I was clinging to. Moving on.

Apparently King Brannon (first king of Terrasen, Elena’s father, hot fae dude with fire powers) put the door knocker there to watch Elena’s tomb. I have to ask what the door knocker’s powers are aside from speech, but I know I will receive no answer.

The door knocker (whose name we have now learned is Mort) says that her name is the funniest thing he’s heard in centuries.

Apparently Elena is recharging after helping Celaena and won’t be back for a while. Mort says he has a message from her to Celaena though. Celaena decides to put that off and examines the tomb more thoroughly.

There’s a sword of truth, wyrdmarks on the walls, and Gavin Havilliard’s armor but no sign of Elena’s. The lunar eclipse puts the tomb almost entirely in darkness and Celaena agrees to hear what Elena has to say.

Mort cleared his throat, and then said in a voice that sounded eerily like the queen’s, “ ‘If I could leave you in peace, I would. But you have lived your life aware that you will never escape certain burdens. Whether you like it or not, you are bound to the fate of this world. As the King’s Champion, you are now in a position of power, and you can make a difference in the lives of many.’ ” Celaena’s stomach turned over.

“Cain and the ridderak were just the beginning of the threat to Erilea,” Mort said, the words echoing around the tomb. “There is a far deadlier power poised to devour the world.”

“And I have to find it, I suppose?”

“Yes. There will be clues to lead you to it. Signs you must follow. Refusing to kill the king’s targets is only the first and smallest step.”

Celaena has the usual ‘why should I bother helping other people because my life sucked’ discussion with Mort, who does the wise old mentor parts right down to “you don’t mean that.”

Mort just glowered at her. “You’re that selfish? That cowardly? Why did you come down here tonight, Celaena? To help us all? Or just to help yourself? Elena told me about you—about your past.”

“Shut your rutting face,” she snapped, and stormed up the stairs.

End chapter 6.

Comparison

Accidental parallels ahoy! Neither Maerad nor Celaena want their destinies. Both are told the fate of the world hinges on them.

Of course, The Riddle has Maerad keep it on the down low and ponder things herself even as she keeps moving forward because she has had a crappy life, and she doesn’t want other people to have a crappy life. We also know who Maerad is and why she’s important to the grand scheme of things, while ToG is taking its sweet time confirming what seemed to me on first read incredibly obvious. I remember being confused when it was a reveal and flipping back through. That’s just the kind of book ToG is. Of course she’s a long lost princess. Of course she is.

I just wish the book didn’t pretend it was going to be a surprise.

We also have Maerad remembering the last book and some key points and having an action scene almost right off the bat. Celaena, the action murder heroine, has yet to have a fight six chapters in.If you took away Maerad’s experiences, she wouldn’t be the same character. If you took away Celaena’s, she would still be doing exactly what the plot says she should be doing, because nothing has formed or been formed by Celaena.

If that makes sense.

Stats

The Riddle

Pages: 18

Fragments: 14

Em-Dashes: 14

Ellipses: 6

ToG

Pages: 51

Fragments: 110

Em-Dashes: 116

Ellipses: 48

#myth reads #myth reads the books of pellinor #myth reads the riddle #myth rags on throne of glass

[ginnyzero]

Completely Harmless Ch. 58

Completely Harmless An SSO SilverGlade Re-imagining Story (Or Fix it Fan Salt fic) By Ginny O.

When Lily and her friends wanted to buy horses and were directed to the Silverglade Manor and its myriad of problems, they didn’t expect to start a revolution. They were just a bunch a stable girls. Completely harmless. Right?

A/N: Things are only canon if I say they’re canon. Pre-Saving the Moorland Stables compliant for the most part. Posted in its entirety on my website. Posted in 2000 to 4000 word bits here. Rated T for Swearing Word Count 177,577

Chapter Fifty-Eight The Compass to the Rift of the Pink Hell

From Valedale, they took the transport to the Wolf Hall Inn and rode to Guardian’s Dale.

“You’ve got the keystone.” Evergray coughed by the remnants of the fifth statue.

Lily kept it on her lap. “Why do you think a keystone will work to open this gate, anyways?”

“Didn’t you read the inscription?” Evergray pointed at it with his staff.

“It’s not in any language I recognize.”

Evergray shifted on his feet. “Sorry. I forgot you don’t read Pandorian. Allow me.” He squared his shoulders. “Guardians of Pandoria’s fate return to us one day. Four will open up the gate, the fifth will lead the way.”

“Pandoria’s fate, not Jorvik’s.” Lily tilted her head.

“I believe in the fifth statue there was a keystone. We replace the keystone and have the four soul horses, we can open up the gate.”

“Okay, so, you travel to Pandoria through these rips in the fragile world finding them by your compass.”

“You remember correctly.” Evergray nodded and coughed. “The boundaries between this world and Pandoria is insubstantial. In fact, it is more like a sponge full of holes. Things slip through all the time.” Evergray coughed again. “Rifts happen when there is a massive boundary failure. Things aren’t always so dramatic. Lost socks in the wash. Missing homework. They might have slipped into Pandoria.”

“Déjà vu,” Lily said. “They’re glitches in the matrix.”

“In my twenty years of exploring, I’ve seen more things than lost homework and lonely socks. Cars. Whole ships. The entire canned goods aisle of a grocery store, the shelves still stocked. I’ve heard rumors of an entire island ripped from our world to theirs.”

“Crazy and a bit surreal, go on,” Linda said.

“In order to get to a specific point without a keystone, you need my compass, the Celestial Wayfinder. It can find those tiny holes where it’s possible to pass through. Remember, time and space don’t operate the same way there as they do here. Finding the right rift without a corresponding energy signature is like finding a needle in an infinite number of haystacks.”

“Thus, the keystone,” Lily said. “And I do hope it’s the correct keystone.”

“With that keystone, we can use the compass to find the needle in the haystack that is Jorvik.” Evergray gestured. “I can match the energy reading to my charts and tune the Celestial Wayfinder and we can find the correct area.” Evergray sat on the stone step and pulled out a chart.

Not quite willing to trust him with the keystone, Lily dismounted. She brought it over to him and unwrapped it.

“Hmm, the rift’s specific location exists on a spectrum of possibility. Very complicated quantum magic goes into determining where it is. Shall I show you the math?”

“I’m sixteen. We’re into trigonometry. This sounds more like calculus.”

“No.”

“No,” Lily said.

Linda sat on the other side and adjusted her glasses to watch him work.

Evergray muttered and ran his finger along the chart listings. It appeared he was doing the complicated math in his head. It took him some time. Alex got bored and wandered around the dale examining the statues better.

Evergray spoke instead of mumbling having come to his conclusion. “Very well, I believe that the rift shall open soon in the Mirror Marsh to the south west of here. We should ride there and I can calibrate it better to pinpoint the precise location and predict where the rift will be before it opens.”

“Do we look like we have anything else better to do?” Lily wrapped the stone and held it out to Linda. “I’m not sure how the fragments will react to this.”

“Poorly probably,” Linda said.

They mounted and Evergray got on the back of Lily’s horse. “I heard you used the Sun Fragment and Star Fragment to great advantage in Hillcrest.”

“Did you also hear I passed out?” Lily said. “So, let’s not have to do that anytime soon.”

Evergray hummed.

They let him off and road around helping him calibrate the compass. It would be faster with them on horseback than he could do on foot.

The compass pointed off to one of the furthest islands to the east of the Marsh. Letting him back up behind her on Nimbus, they rode over jumping between island to island. Once there, Evergray hopped off Nimbus.

“What you’re looking for is a sample of pure Pandorium. It will be deep pink in color like the keystone you already have. Rifts like this are very unstable and will be open for only a brief period of time. At least in this dimension. Due to the space time dilation between our world and Pandoria, you should have about five minutes on the other side to find what you need.”

“Five minutes,” Lily stared at him.

“In a world we’ve never been to.” Alex gestured. “This is Anne’s thing. Not ours!”

“Then I suggest you be quick about it.”

“No time to sight see.” Lily wrinkled her nose.

“This isn’t a rescue.” Evergray shook his staff and put one hand on his hip. “If you do see Anne or Lisa, don’t dilly dally around. Find the Pandorium and return. Before the portal closes and you’re stuck in Pandoria forever.”

“Like Lisa.” Linda nodded. “Got it.”

“Should we all go?” Lily asked.

“No.” Evergray shook his head. “Lily alone should go. You don’t have the time to split up and get lost. No time to argue, there’s the rift.”

A line of sparkling magenta energy hovered in the middle of the air in front of them. Lily urged Nimbus forward. The line widened and turned into a circular swirl of magic. “I’ll be back, five minutes,” she said to them and Nimbus walked through the portal.

At first it was black, and then, it was a strange place, dark with stone walkways broken apart and hovering in midair.

“No time, no time,” Lily muttered.

Nimbus settled his wings closer to his back, in his ‘true’ form now that they were in Pandoria. “Let’s go then,” he said and took off running. He jumped gaps and skidded around corners.

There was another portal at the end of the broken stones.

Nimbus didn’t stop jumping through it.

They landed in a land of pink and purple with bits of orange.

“Pink hell,” Lily said. “Check.”

Small and huge mushrooms dominated the space, vying with crystal shards.

Lily rode up to the nearest. “Is that Pandorium?”

“Hell if I know.”

Lily found a broken off chunk. “Looks close enough. Though this is too small if I’m remembering correctly.” Maybe she should have brought a hammer and chisel. She wasn’t prepared.

The ground was like purple fungus almost with purple grass. In places it was purple stone rippling like water. It was a surreal space.

Lily was ever mindful of the time as she rode around looking for different chunks of Pandorium. Too brittle, wrong something, it didn’t feel right. The right piece ended up being in a grove of the purple glowing willow like trees.

“Should have known.” She tucked it into her bag.

Nimbus turned on his heels. “We’ve wasted too much time,” he ran back flexing his wings to skim over jumps and down back to the portal. They ran back up the broken stone causeway and through the other portal.

Nimbus’ sides heaved.

“Lily!” Linda gasped.

“I’ve got one.” Lily pulled it out of her saddlebag.

“Just in time, there goes the rift,” Evergray said. He frowned. “Well, that’s odd.”

“What’s odd?”

“It didn’t shut up properly. I think it took off somewhere else. Maybe you will be able to find it again.”

“I don’t think I want to,” Lily said. “So much pink, hurts my eyes.” She blinked hard.

“This one is perfect.” Evergray examined the stone in her hand.

“Good.” Lily refrained from rolling her eyes. Because she wasn’t going back if it wasn’t perfect. “Now, we must head back to the Stonecutter’s Vault and see if Magnus remembers how to make them.” Lily tucked it away.

“I’m sure he’ll be insulted you thought he forgot.” Linda smiled.

“Perhaps, I shall come with you,” Evergray said. “It’s been ages since I’ve seen Magnus.”

The three girls looked at each other.

“I’m not touching that with a ten foot pole,” Alex said.

“Nope,” Lily added. She offered Evergray a hand up.

Linda shook her head.

Evergray took it. “I don’t know what you’re going on about.”

“You said yourself that the Valley of the Hidden Dinosaur had been cut off for over a century.”

“Ah, but I know my away around Pandoria.” Evergray smiled.

Lily didn’t dare look over her shoulder at him. “Like we said, we aren’t touching it.”

They left the Mirror Marsh and headed to the Wolf Hall Inn. Hopefully there would be less people, and less questions.

--

The ghost of Magnus Steiner seemed confused. “You have returned. What is this gift you have brought me?”

“If you’d heard me all the way out.” Lily raised a brow at him.

“Did something happen to the keystone that I gave you already?” Magnus tucked is hands into the arms of his robe.

Linda unwrapped it.

“What we need,” Lily said cradling the raw Pandorium in one arm so she could gesture at the keystone, “is a close to duplicate keystone to that one as possible. This piece of Pandorium is from the exact same area as that one.”

“I am confused. There’s no need for two keystones. Besides, it would take decades to teach you the mastery of runic forging.” Magnus sniffed.

“Magnus!” Evergray said brightly.

“Hell’s bells, is that you Evergray?”

“In the flesh,” Evergray coughed. “You haven’t aged a day.”

“You, on the other hand, look absolutely ghastly,” Magnus said with far too much relish.

Alex groaned.

Lily looked up at the ceiling.

Linda rolled her eyes.

“These are my protégés.” Evergray gestured. “I know you taught me runic forging.”

“Can’t be done.” Magnus shook his head. “They know too little and you can’t carve. Not with your body in that state. What have you done to yourself old friend?”

“Ah, too much travelling in Pandoria.”

“I warned you.”

“So you did,” Evergray agreed amiably enough. “Perhaps another, there is one I know of,” he trailed off. “He could be convinced, I believe.”

“Conrad,” Lily said, her lips parting. “He will not and does not and downright refuses to follow directions.” She turned to Magnus. “I’m assuming there’s some foundational knowledge that we need to know.”

“It takes decades,” Magnus said again.

“We don’t have decades. We might not have ten days.” Alex waved her arms. “Justin is under his control and Lisa and Anne prisoners in Pandoria.”

“Evergray.” Magnus’ shade strengthened. “Is this true? Are two of the Soul Riders prisoners in Pandoria?”

“Yes.” Evergray nodded and coughed. “Lily has a plan to get them out.”

Lily’s brow furrowed. “Wait, how did you know that this keystone,” she gestured at Linda again, “is the right keystone? Especially since there’s more than one hidden in this Vault. And don’t deny there isn’t. There are more hidden doors I’m sure you control, Magnus. You don’t create a vault for one thing and you said keystones already.”

Evergray coughed and it was the cough of his sickness rather than the need to clear his throat.

Linda fiddled in her pockets and passed him a throat lozenge.

“Thank you, it probably won’t help.” Evergray popped it into his mouth. “You didn’t hear that part, hmm.”

“Avalon said something,” Lily’s brow furrowed. She switched arms with the Pandorium.

“The druids know approximately where Anne is being held in Pandoria and he happened to mention it. Once I decoded the code in the Pandoria Codex. It was simple enough.”

“And they’re doing nothing!” Alex shouted.

“They think she’s too deep in order to get out safely,” Evergray fiddled with his staff. “They don’t want to risk the two Soul Riders they have left.”

“They want someone expendable,” Lily concluded. “This person they’re waiting for. I bet until she proved herself, she’d be expendable. I like this Fripp less and less.”

“It’d be a test,” Evergray said.

“Fripp is a rodent,” Magnus said with distaste. “What is your plan?”

“Justin is being held on an oil rig near the Golden Bay along with his horse Saga, and Concorde. The oil rig has a gate that can create a stable portal to Pandoria. Alex can take a keystone and rig it into the gate.”

Alex nodded and cracked her knuckles.

“We use that gate to escape with Justin into Pandoria near where Anne is being held and hopefully Lisa has made it through. The keystone has too much energy and is unstable. The gate will explode making it impossible for them to follow us until they get to another gate if they have one. Hopefully no, but I bet the oil rigs are fairly cookie cutter.” Lily stopped. Did they have cookie cutters in the 13th century? She changed her words. “Err, the same. Then, Evergray and Linda along with the Soul Horses use the Guardian’s Dale gateway and the keystone to open another portal for us to get out of Pandoria. Hopefully with Justin, Anne, and Lisa in tow.”

“Extremely dangerous. Could have catastrophic consequences if it goes wrong,” Magnus said floating up and down.

“Look, I’ve got a row boat that can carry me along with two things, and a chicken, a fox, and a bag of grain. You take the fox over with the grain, take the grain back and get the chicken, you’re set. That’s the riddle.” Lily waved her hand about. “Now, what do I need to do in order to forge a keystone that doesn’t take decades? At least we aren’t trying to facet the dang thing.”

Magnus chuckled. “And why not?”

“Because that takes a grind stone, not a hammer and chisel which is what I’m assuming carving runes is going to use.” Lily shifted her weight to one hip. She glanced at Linda. “And before you ask, there is a jeweler at the Flea Market.”

Linda grinned.

Magnus considered. “Does this Conrad know how to make horse shoes?”

“That’s what he mostly makes since he won’t follow directions, plans, or blueprints,” Lily muttered.

“Then go learn to make horse shoes and then I will show you runic forging. Learning to forge the horse shoes will show you how much force and pressure you need to apply and teach you how to swing a hammer properly.”

“Stiff wrist,” Lily said. “More in the shoulder than the elbow.”

Magnus didn’t say anything.

“Right. We’ll be off. Hopefully we’ll have at least one keystone to return to you. Since, the other one we plan on having go kablooey,” Lily said lightly. “Thank you for your time. I’ll be back when Conrad finishes with me.”

They took their leave, Evergray and Magnus bidding each other a jovial good bye. They pretended not to overhear Magnus’ word of caution to Evergray about taking Soul Riders, of all people, as protégés given his exile. Evergray didn’t seem to care.

They got back into the snow, putting the keystone and the pandorium in Linda’s saddlebags.

“Moorland,” Lily said. “Well, shit.”

FOR THE ACCOMPANYING IMAGES PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE MY WATERMARK AND CONTACT INFORMATION. THANK YOU. I get it. Some of you might get excited and want to see this stuff in the game, especially the clothes, tack, and pets. However, the only way I want to see this in the game is if I get paid for it. If I see it in the game and I’m not paid for it, there will be hell to pay. You think I’m salty. I’d be angry. Personally, I’m not going to send this info to SSO. If you do, leave my contact information there! Don’t give them any excuses to steal.

Now, I’ll know you haven’t read this note if you leave me comments about how ‘salty’ I am about the game and if I hate it so much I should do something else. I am doing something else. It’s called Mystic Riders MMORPG Project. Mystic Riders however is a very baby phase game. You can check out our plans on the game dev blog. (Skills, Factions, Professions, Crafting, Mini-Games, 25+ horse breeds!) If you know anyone who would be interested and has money or contacts about game making, direct them to the blog.

#star stable #star stable online #sso #fan fic #jorvik reimagined #star stable salt #completely harmless #silverglade reimagined #many nods to ruth westside

[chrismurman]

How Do You Know When To Step Away?

There aren’t many people from college I keep up with anymore. Just a few close buddies that I spent almost every day of life with for a few years. After graduation, we would call often, even do group calls to laugh at each other. Then when one of us would get engaged or have a kid, we’d trek to their hood for some fellowship.

Now, there’s a group text where we share what’s going on when something needs to be shared, coordinate a rare meetup, or make fun of each other’s teams during the NFL season.

When we were in each other’s lives in our 20s, we spent a ton of energy around hanging out. There was a huge return on the investment because I have lifelong friends that would come bail me out at the drop of a hat if I asked.

I think.

To spend that much time on them now would be much more work for very little return. We have significant others, kids, pets, jobs, and lives to lead in other cities. If we finally did a weekend trip somewhere it would be much more expensive than drinking cheap beer at the lake in college. And the morning after now would be much more painful.

What I’m describing is an aspect of the law of diminishing returns. [1] It’s a fairly simple concept and refers to a point at which the level of profits or benefits gained is less than the amount of money or energy invested. At some point in time of my relationship with these gents, we all realized it wasn’t going to be like it was.

The same could be said for the time we spend coaching our teams, programs, and leaders today.

It’s a harsh thing to communicate. The minute I meet a new group of people to partner with on the road to agility I’m trying to put myself out of a job. That means I have to immediately prepare them for the day I won’t be around. I rarely have the exact date in mind when I say this, but we all know it’s true.

My time with teams will at some point need to come to an end.

In the beginning, everyone has hope (or less skepticism than usual) for a better way of working. They haven’t gotten tired of the sound of my voice. My analogies and cliches are new. I might even bring treats to the initial kick off. That never lasts though, and they will eventually have their fill.

Which led me to explore the concept of understanding when you’ve reached that tipping point and how to best handle that transition.

Just as a caveat, this may not apply to all of you. You may be a full-time employee assigned to a team or group of teams. You may have contract lengths to adhere to as a consultant. Or you just may like the area you are working in. I’ll add something at the end for those of you as well.

Avoid the awkward with better up front expectations.

One of the most important parts of my job is sitting down with leadership early on to establish our working agreement. This includes several items, depending on the engagement. Most importantly, I want to know what they think I should accomplish and how to handle it if I disagree with some their assessment after onboarding.

Often, the objective includes phrases like, “teach us this framework, then step us through a few iterations.” It could be to assist them with a re-org as they build agile teams from scratch. I might even be fortunate enough to teach leadership some things about viewing our work differently before moving to teams.

The struggle is by the time I show up most clients are chomping at the bit for me to get started and want to breeze past the initial working agreement. There are several reasons for this, which probably merit a post on just this topic. Just know you can’t push past this.

Defining the endpoint may be difficult, but establishing the end point is key. I’ve often been sitting in leadership meetings with this awkward feeling. Everybody is asking me how things are going. Discussion centers around the topic of how do we know if we are accomplishing our goals. If I had done a better job of establishing expectations earlier in the process, I would be better equipped to handle this discussion.

You won’t know if it’s time to push the baby birds out of the nest on unless you know where you want them to go. If you want to read more on this, Jason Little’s book is a great place to start.

They need me to step back from them, but they may need to step away from you too.

Let’s say you’ve established a great working agreement with leadership, including healthy outcomes for the team or program. Then comes the actual execution. Even the most experienced coach can struggle to accomplish tasks with some groups. The more entrenched the culture and frozen middle, the harder the transformation can be.

Often, the task is too much for a single person.

What I often hear from colleagues (and myself) will be to blame the other side for the challenges. “They’re just not ready for transformation,” is the common refrain. All of that might be true, but what I’ve had to learn the hard way is the team’s problem might be staring me back in the mirror.

As a guide through the buzzword of transformation, all I have is tools and a few quirky stories to tell teams. I do not have a magic wand.

When I notice that teams aren’t responding to me like they used to, I try not to lie to myself. There could be a personality conflict with me, a difference in approach. Maybe I made a scrum master feel disregarded, or a project manager marginalized. It could be the just won’t want to play along. Regardless, the best thing I can do in this situation is own my part in things.

If it comes to a point where they would respond to someone else, made its best to be honest with leadership. Its hard doing that, but if we really care about their journey then we should create the best environment. One that doesn’t include me for the moment.

Involve them with identifying the tipping point.

Change plans are a necessary evil with my work, one that I’m not very good at. It could be my lack of training in the area of Organizational Change Management practices. Or I’m stubborn and just want to tell funny stories in workshops instead. Either way, plans help everyone feel better about the work we do.

What I find disconcerting is the propensity to hide them subconsciously instead of just make them as visible as our product backlogs. Just like a well written epic, I find writing the objectives with leadership on cards and decomposing them in front of the team a healthy practice.

If everyone is walking the wall of transformation just like our other boards, everyone comes to the realization at the same time that we are reaching our tipping point of diminishing returns.

Another awesome tool I’ve had the chance to participate in is transformation demos. Just like the working software version, we want to iterate our way through the process of change and show our work along the way. I’ve seen leadership benefit from breaking up the work into smaller chunks and having a conversation about how the work is going.

By seeing transformation in smaller chunks, it’s easier to see when we are getting close to our definition of done.

What if you want or need to keep going?

For all the reasons I described earlier, and many more, you might not have an opportunity to fire yourself. You would like to find a way to stick around, but you can see all the tell tale signs mentioned above. What should you do?

First off, have an open and honest with leadership and acknowledge where you are. If you’ve been stepping everyone through the process, it will seem more natural to want to help evolve your role or swap things up.

You can also stay put but shift into more of a mentor with your area of work. Find ways to elevate others into your position. The learning you gain as a mentor far will pair with your first hand experience.

Also, explore more areas of transformation in your program or team. While it may seem like you’re trying to squeeze blood out of a turnip at first, people are usually up for coming up with more ways they want to change things up. Add to your transformation backlog just like you would a product backlog.

Regardless of how close you are to the tipping point, just know that it’s coming. And it’s okay to reach the point of diminishing returns of your coaching. The more proactive you can be as you near it, the more prepared you will be for the next stage of change.

And yours.

Yes, I did a lot of research into the law. It is commonly used by economists to describe that if I increase the amount of energy I spend on something I will get less in return. That would apply somewhat differently to this article, but it can apply loosely. Dont come at me with your pitchforks, Internet.

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