#i've said this before and i'll say it again. this track is so fuckin gay | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

elistransblahg · 5 years

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1 year on T!

And boy do I have some updates! Early disclaimer for some medical terminology some trans guys may not be comfortable with.

So my dose was raised last week to two pumps of 200mg/2ml compounded cream. I am now on what is generally considered a full dose of testosterone. I don't regret taking it slow, but I'm ready to speed it up a bit!

Before we get to the physical bit, we're gonna talk about the mental stuff.

My anger issues have essentially died since starting T. I feel like my life has meaning and that I have stuff to look forward to and as a whole I'm just a much happier person. That being said, dysphoria is still a little bitch. My need for top surgery is growing and my means to get there is not (although I do know what surgeon I want). I'm so far detached from my chestnuts that even seeing other people's is dysphoria-inducing. Bottom dysphoria is also a thing now. I definitely want a packer, I'm not just debating on it anymore.

Despite that though, I'm overall a happier and more laid-back person than I used to be.

On to physical stuff! Same as always, top to bottom. Another disclaimer for those who may not be comfortable with medical terminology. I apologize for the photo quality, it's cold in my house and I'm very sleepy lmao

My hairline has definitely changed, though it's still not at all concerning. It's made more obvious by my widow's peak, which is less obvious here because my roots are coming in lol

As you can also slightly see in this, my eyebrows haven't really changed but I do have a lil bit of facial hair coming in! It's just... very blond. It's very there, but very blond. I have three long hairs under my chin and a little mustache goin on. I tried to take a better picture of it but alas, the lighting in my house won't let me.

Little comparison for facial structure, again sorry for the sleepy. Anyway... I don't feel I've changed too much since day one, changed the side I part my hair on but... correct me if I'm wrong loooool

Voice! So! I posted a quick song a little while ago and that's how my singing voice sounds now. I was never comfortable posting my singing anywhere but I'm getting there! I will be posting a couple videos of me talking later. Its bizarre to me that my singing voice has changed so much more drastically than my speaking voice. When I listen to my own voice now, whether just talking or singing, I'm actually pretty happy with how far I've come. I like how it sounds. On its own, I feel like my voice passes pretty well as a stereotypical gay man's. I'm gonna keep training it and hope it drops more c:

I have noticed no change in shoulders. I'm starting to work out though so here's hoping.

No difference in chestnuts since the last update, but since this is the one year update I'm gonna say stuff anyway. Before starting testosterone I wasn't one to bind very often because of health concerns, so I can safely say that my chest sags and no longer has any kind of self-support. I do bind regularly now as I'm starting to pass to the general public, and it honestly has not changed the shape of my chest further. My chest has always been pretty insensitive to any kind of touch, but surprisingly enough it's even more so now.

My arms are hairier (though I had monkey arms to begin with) and some months ago I had bumps all over em where more hair was growing in. Those have, for the most part, healed. The hair is blond. I'm a redhead. Why is everything blond.

I don't have any chest hair, but I do have a slight happy trail. No other hair on my stomach though.

Hips! They've lost a little bit of their shape but I was/am a very curvy person and I can only hope T will fix that.

Disclaimer for bottom talk! No pictures, don't worry!

Every time I say this and every time it's worse. The ass hair. The fuckin ass hair is real. And real fuckin annoying.

As for the front end... My clit is still growing. It looks like a lil penis. It's cute. No I will not be sharing pictures. Don't ask. I'm tired of it.

My vagina still discharges and cleans itself and all that. A lot of guys report being dry after being on T for a while, but as of yet I don't have that issue. Can't speak for the sex stuff though since I don't do that.

Okay! End bottom talk!

On to legs!

They match my arms! Very, very hairy (I didn't actually have much hair on my legs pre-t) and very, very blond (it's like my appendages don't know I'm a redhead)! Had bumps on them too while more hair was growing in, and that's also healed.

I've gone up half a shoe size since starting T. Have not gotten any taller. Did not expect to lmao.

I have started dieting and lost 20 pounds in the past four or five months. I'm so good at keeping track loooool

I'm starting weight training, so hopefully that'll help with my shape and with losing weight.

If there is something I missed or something you want to know about my experience with taking testosterone, shoot me an ask and I'll answer when I can. I don't update this blog much but I am on every day c:

Okay, I think that's it! I'm going to bed! Goodnight!

#ftm #transgender #hrt #testosterone #ftm hrt #long post

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