#idk maybe hes dictating them but i feel like id recognise his voice more

[mcl38]

new lando article just dropped! its fun that hes not following a strict schedule, writing (or dictating - jury’s still out) this column before the singapore gp means this is less of a race report and more of a fun update of his life. it also means that he spends a decent portion of it talking about pissing his pants (hypothetical, never happened). make of that what you will. anyways as always i am reminding you not to subscribe to the telegraph or even give them ad money by visiting their website, because i will be posting every single article in full as soon as it drops. u can find them all under the hashtag ‘lando’s columns’. this one (as always) will be under the cut, enjoy the read!

[photo of lando looking at some telemetry, jose and will blurry on either side of him. he’s wearing the black singapore fireproofs] 

Imagine a street circuit like Monaco where one little mistake can put you in the wall. Now add speed. Marina Bay may not be the fastest street circuit in the world. But it’s bumpy. And hot – 30C plus and over 90 per cent humidity, meaning a tropical downpour is never far from turning the track into an ice rink.

Yep, for overall toll on the body and all-round intensity, I would say Singapore is right up there as the toughest race on the calendar. It’s not as hard on your neck or your core as, say, Miami. But it’s just so energy-sapping. So intense under those lights.

I have actually only ever raced here once, in my rookie season back in 2019. So I’m by no means an expert. But I well remember just how draining it was. Literally. You have to drink so much before the race that you begin it 2 per cent heavier than normal. Then you sweat so much during the race you not only lose that 2 per cent but at least another 2 per cent on top of that.

It’s brutal. Taking on so much fluid, and constantly topping up the levels, leads me to a question we’re sometimes asked as F1 drivers: do we ever pee in our race suits?

I can honestly tell you I never have. I love my race crew too much to do that to them! I wouldn’t be surprised if it has happened in the past, though. 

[photo of the special livery MCL36 looking soooo sexy in pink guys i love this car so much u dont get it]

Sometimes, particularly in a race which involves a safety car, we can be out there for well over two hours. I was absolutely desperate for a wee at the end of the last race at Monza for instance. But I haven’t yet been so desperate that I’ve just gone in my race suit.

Most of the time, you are so focused on the race itself you don’t actually notice that you need to go. It’s only when you finish, or like I say, when a safety car comes out, that you sometimes realise how desperate you are.

To be honest, in Singapore pretty much all of the fluid you take on is secreted out through sweat. It is so hot inside your suit and helmet that one driver said he used to put a woman's sanitary towel inside his helmet to try to soak up the sweat while he was racing, so that it wouldn’t drip into his eyes.

I have never gone that far, but I do prepare a little differently for the race at Marina Bay. I train on an indoor bike wearing extra layers of clothes: a hoodie, a jacket, a hat. It’s horrible but it makes a big difference when you come here. I even have a couple of electric heaters which I put in the room with me while I’m cycling to try to get me really cooking.

The other thing I’m going to do this weekend, and which I don’t do anywhere else, is drive with a drinks bottle. 

Generally I don’t tend to drink during a race. It’s just not something I’ve ever felt the need to do. I think Barcelona in May this year, when I had tonsillitis and needed to keep drinking on every lap to stop myself from going downhill, was the only other occasion I’ve needed a drinks bottle. But as I say, taking on fluids in Singapore is just a non-negotiable so I have asked my mechanics to put one in the car for me. 

I’m looking forward to the weekend though. I’m feeling good and ready to go. I arrived out here quite early this week and I feel as if I’ve acclimatised pretty well. I’m a night-owl anyway so staying on European time is not a problem for me. It’s what I would choose to do. I’ve also had a lot of fun this week with my new toy: a digital camera which I bought out here on the recommendation of my photographer (who is now very jealous of it).

[photo of beloved with his face covered by a digital camera. this camera has been the bane of my existence and also a source of constant entertainment, much like this column. much like lando himself]

I’ve had a lot of fun exploring Singapore and experimenting with what it can do. I’m not very good with it yet, but I’m really enjoying it.

I just love documenting my life to be honest. I’d have someone with me documenting it all if I could stand for that person to be following me around all the time. Which I cannot. Hence why I’ve got myself a camera I suppose! I just like to look back and record cool things. My summer golf trip for instance. It would have been really cool to have a digital record of that. I like to throw myself into new things generally. 

You might notice that I’m wearing a slightly different helmet this weekend. It’s actually one inspired by Master Chief’s helmet from the Halo games to celebrate my esports team announcing we’re joining the Halo Championship Series [HSC] partner programme.  Quadrant, my team, is something I’m very excited about. So far Halo is our only esports title, but we have big plans to grow the Quadrant brand and expand into other titles. Watch this space! 

For the next few weeks, all my focus is on Formula One. I finished P7 here in 2019. I’d love to go better this weekend. It will not be easy at the toughest race in the world. But we’ll give it everything. Now, where’s my drinks bottle?

#lando norris #formula 1 #f1 #lando's columns #i do genuinely think he wrote at least parts of this #i think the 'literally.' is such a written stylistic choice #as well as the awkward construction in 'i well remember'. it sounds like lando #and the exclamation marks around the end #idk maybe hes dictating them but i feel like id recognise his voice more #anyways enjoy him talking abt his new hobby / nico rosberg pad-gate / piss / halo #also reiterating yet again the thing i once claimed in a post (that he doesnt use a drinks bottle) and got absolutely rinsed for #whatever im not bitter (is) #lando