i will soften every edge, hold the world to its best | 2
summary ;; Your burning determination to prove your father wrong and Jake's wish to teach you a lesson both end up in a pyrrhic victory.
PART 1 | PART 3
pairings ;; dad!jake sully x reader, mom!neytiri x reader, sully family x reader
genre ;; pure angst and family feels
notes / explanations ;; im speechlessly overwhelmed at the sheer amount of love you guys showed me these past couple of days. like. literally never had something like this happen to me before. i got too excited to finish this chapter to give back to yall, there was an attempt to proofread but... i hope it's not too bad, please enjoy! as always, if you see any mistakes, im sorry!
The path further into the floating mountains was all the worse to navigate thanks to the lack of light, the only useful guides you had were the faintly flickering bioluminescent lights from the forest deep below. The branches twisting around each other to create a naturally built bridge from mountain to mountain benefited from this, contrasting as a clear obscured line to your eyes against the glow underneath.Â
The easiest part of your journey, in hindsight, was just skipping along this line.Â
You werenât exactly happy about this. Â
The more you left behind, the more you were freaked out that Neteyam or anyone else was onto your intentions already and hot on your trail right this moment. Imagining father making a beeline to you in the air with Bob, a cruel, merciless whistling arrow, made you all jittery and almost puking kind of nervous, pulling at the depths of your stomach.Â
Your rationality told you that it was a half an hour walk to your spot from the tent, and Neteyam would be hurrying the more he thought he wasnât able to catch up with you along the way, so you had around twenty minutes until the whole family was panicking and raising the clan to look for you.Â
Tuk had gone missing once thanks to some hide and seek game with Loâak (sheâd hidden so well and was waiting for her siblings to find her already, blindly sticking to the game for an entire day, not out of stubbornness but childish purity), and this was exactly what had gone down â
the resentful part of you questioned if father thinks of you highly enough to resort to that.Â
If something happened to you, he would maybe urge your brothers to search for you for a while, and drop it then â leaving you to your own devices happily.Â
Maybe.Â
Were you even worth it in his eyes for a search party? You wondered if he cared enough that you disappeared.Â
But that was a stupid, childish thought you knew you fantasized about a lot â perhaps this was why heâd called you immature. This was no mindset for a strong, independent, confident hunter. The thought father was right, even a miniscule bit was bitter on your tongue, worse than what he called black coffee.Â
Disappearing so youâd find out just how much he cared was unfair to mom, for one.Â
She had lost so much in such a short amount of time, the stories she sang poignantly about were hard to listen to without tearing up. Her home. The trees of voices, all the lost ancestors. Her father. Uncle Tsuâtey. Her first ikran, Seze. Loss upon loss you think thereâd be nothing left to give anymore, but sky peopleâs fire was always hungry, always willing to waste more to grow bigger.Â
You wouldnât forgive yourself for making her cry in your pursuit to punish father. Never.Â
You werenât a child.
Just wanted to be one, sometimes.
Wanted father to babytalk you, pet your head longer than a passing touch as he walked away hurriedly to attend to other matters, make beads for your braids the way he always did from pretty stones he found on ponds, carve you little trinkets when you graciously had to give up your toys to Loâak and Kiriâs greed.Â
Your neck piece was all them in fact, heâd see it if he ever paid enough attention, or perhaps it was all insignificant to him, five kids meant countless belongings for each individual child had been passed down from his hands, it would be a miracle for father to recognize you still wore his clumsy creations. But again, it had been too long since heâd even looked at you affectionately, he wouldnât See.Â
Heâd transferred those habits entirely to Neteyam at one point in time.Â
Your older brother would always ruffle Loâakâs hair and tease him the way father used to, comfort him in his own playful way, and even though the younger looked discontent at being babied, you knew he was happy Neteyam was quite literally his shadow to look after him through tough times â including shielding from fatherâs line of fire. In return, he was suffering from being a foil to the older son, you understood the struggle because you were going through the same comparison, you just werenât obsessed with catching and living up to father as much as Loâak did.Â
Win some, lose some, I guess.
Plus, Neteyam was trembling under the massive planet-weight pressure, he had to set the standard, he had to live up to the older brother title. He was becoming more of a father figure to Tuk as days passed and the Oloâeyktan became more transparent from his familyâs life as a dad to five.Â
Besides, Loâak made trouble enough for two people to go around that you felt bad for your big brother, Kiri was thankfully more mellow (despite frequently hanging out together with him and Spider) compared to him that Neteyam could breathe, not having to divide his attention.Â
You were in awe of her about how disconnected she was from all the changing dynamics. She had her own problems you could never understand, more spiritual than your grandmother, and ever the ethereal soul who you thought would disappear into Eywa if flesh wasnât holding her down to Eywaâeveng.
You were the teeniest, tiniest bit jealous of her (and Tuk) holding the softer sides of father, the boys thought he was deliberately softer because they were girls â but you were also a girl, so why werenât you allowed in?  Â
Well, thanks to that, youâd gotten closer with Neteyam and known him better after the whole clan had settled on High Camp, so it wasnât all that bad. You could badmouth father all day long sitting on some rock and make him laugh abashedly, guilty that he was smiling along with the trashing of the fatherâs name he respected so much â it was therapy, as Norm had taught humans frequently sought back on earth. It got you trying some things with Neteyam, becoming more of a companion and ranting buddy for him who he could be honest and open with, so that he didnât have to worry about taking up a larger role in your life to fill fatherâs missing presence. You were concerned about him more than he could be concerned about you.Â
That got you contemplating if father had noticed how comfortable his two oldest children were with each other that it was always Neteyam who he sent after you. A girl could dream, no? For one moment, it wasnât because it was Neteyamâs responsibility, but because father was paying attention to how his kids got along.
The image of him pushed you to be frantically fast to reach your destination as the fear returned with might. If he caught you right now when you had no ikran to prove him wrong, the punishment he was sure to give would be way more humiliating, you at least wanted something in your name to taunt him with if you were going down anyways.Â
A smile crept up your face at imagining him discombobulated and speechless, unable to pick out one thing that you did wrong.Â
The carelessness that came with your speed combined with how dark it was to see where to clutch and put your feet on caused you to slip up countless times when climbing, the sharp rocks scraping the insides of your palms and insides of your forearms, lifting your skin up. What you cared about more than the pain was that the blood was now tracking material for your family to sniff you out â you couldnât exactly wipe the rocks clean, so you carried on with a hammering heart, more afraid of father ruining your perfect moment than whatever ikran that would soon be going straight for your throat.Â
At least you were able to wash the blood off your hands in the waterfall.Â
Downside? You couldnât see shit. With your bare back flushed straight to the wall of rock and your feet feeling out the thin edge, the shrill cry of ikrans and the roaring of water was about to overwhelm your senses too much to pay attention âÂ
and you slipped.Â
The shriek that ripped out of you at the sensation of falling and the drop of your stomach alone almost made you pass out, and for a split second it was a good thing that you wouldnât feel the moment you died, but your body, once again, was one step ahead of you, it twisted in the air the last second and your hands gripped the ledge.Â
The wet rock and your blood made all that your life was hanging on slippery as you dangled into the abyss, swaying with the strong winds at this height.Â
You didnât know if it was the adrenaline or the nervousness, but something made you laugh out loud, and the bubbling laughter continued until you were able to pull yourself up safely at the ikran rookery, finally.Â
Looking around like a fish out of water, how you hadnât cracked your skull open shooting down to the forest below was a total miracle.Â
Youâd made it? Â
No one was there to witness what you just pulled off in total darkness. Your whole body was shaking, and you werenât even chosen by an ikran yet. This was happening. Shit. This was totally happening!Â
Your excited and terrified, âHell yeah!â went unheard apart from your aerial crowd.Â
But.Â
One among them answered your holler with its own that cut into the night like a battle horn. It was the closest one to you that was apparently watching you the whole time, starting to roar at you and twitching on its feet, shadow in the night informing you of its movements.
Youâd seen from Neteyam and Loâakâs iknimayas that you only had a few seconds to pull your shit together until it attacked, this was meant to be dangerous, serious, you could end up as a late night snack to them if things went wrong, but you couldnât stop grinning from ear to ear that it had chosen you.
You were chosen.Â
It wanted you as its rider.Â
If only father could see you now. The sensation of being the one â being special was unmatched. Now you could somehow get the fraction of the high he must have felt as Toruk Makto. Â
The, âLetâs fucking go!â that left you kept echoing into the night as you lunged at it, dodging to the left when it snapped at your head, hooking one arm around the ikranâs slender neck and clamping your legs around it the moment it started thrashing around wildly.Â
You didnât know why father had made a big deal out of it. You formed tsaheylu in no time, breaking Neteyamâs record â and you didnât even have the rope to hoop around its neck and jaw.Â
Firstborn daughter excellence.Â
Confidence restored and triumphing wildly to the pulse of your heart, the flickering smile on your face in wonder turned into a full-fledged smirk. At that moment, nothing mattered. It was just you and your victory. Proving father wrong.Â
Feeling the ikranâs lifeforce through the bond, a shiver went down your back as his beady eye looked up at you, pupil shrinking and expanding rapidly while you both took a minute to catch your breaths after the fierce wrestling.Â
âGotcha,â you panted. âYouâre mine now.â
The adrenaline made everything sparkle and shine, your spirits soaring high and unbothered about literally anything else in the world, and for one glorious moment, lost in the memories of your brothersâ iknimayas boasting with cheers from the clan and sometimes encouraging, sometimes fearful screams of your parents, your spirit sought them out to be soaked in the same pride â forgetting that it was night and nobody was there to celebrate you.Â
You were all alone.Â
The smile dropped from your face and crashed down like paper thin porcelain upon the slightest movement.Â
Right.Â
Youâd forgotten you were doing this out of spite. It snuffed every twinkle of magic away from the previously shimmering milestone of your life.Â
Your ikran felt the crushing disappointment through your connection and chirped at you, almost like an excited sibling pulling on your arm to show you something, weirdly comforting. Momâs ikran was a spitfire, but also nurturing â this one felt different somehow, you felt him bouncing from wall to wall in your head, hyperactive and cheerful.
Flying! He wanted to fly!Â
The first flight sealed the bond, after all.Â
You werenât alone even if none of your family members were here to share the joy â you had your new buddy. And the drop of gravity was thrilling this time, not the terrifying chaos that had your asshole shriveling up as it was when youâd missed your step.Â
The flights with mom were something you looked forward to, drying up in frequency as you aged, youâd missed the wind on your body and the greenery dancing below as you maneuvered in the air â but mom reserved nighttime rides for father only, and after the move to High Camp, the skimpering chance you could get your way if you begged cutely enough was gone too. Youâd never flown at night.Â
The sight was out of this world. The stars leaving a glowing trail above you, the forest pulsing with faint purple, green and blue lights underneath, everything was elevated in beauty because darkness let them shine.Â
You made loops in the air with your ikran, got as high in the air as you could before your breath thinned, and scraped at the tips of trees before shooting up again, all the while laughter youâve never screamed before bubbled out of you.Â
And you were all alone. There was no mom to gleefully taunt your ikran with hers to get both of you dancing in the air. There was no father to watch on with a small smile he was fighting. There was no Neteyam to stop you from dipping too close to the ground, and no Loâak to challenge you to get closer to race with him â no Kiri to complain how all of you were being so childish, how stupid this was all the while she was the worst of you all, instigating all the chaos.Â
No Tuk in your momâs lap whining about you guys leaving her off the fun.Â
Instead, there was the scent of a bogey in the air, snapping you out of the haze of sorrow.
When had you ventured out further into unprotected territory?Â
Linked with your thought process, the ikran stopped advancing forward and started beating his wings downward to stay unmoving, you observed the surroundings to get a better feeling of where you were, and noticed this was around the old shack, artificial lights were gliding between the leaves and branches that obscured your view of just who was roaming the grounds at night, definitely not a natural part of the forestâs flora.   Â
Fatherâs voice materialized in your head, drilled into you and your siblingsâ heads over and over again. If you come across any threat at all, do not engage, fall back and inform me. Got it? You call for me first.
And that split second of being afraid was your death sentence â that father would be so angry at you for your ignorance, amateurism, carelessness and idiocy that he could throw you out of the family for almost leading the demons to base simply by being there that they could figure out what direction youâd come from. That moment of weakness was enough for someone to snipe you out, and get you falling down from your ikran straight into the forest below, the cries of your new friend falling silent on your ears as you did your best to hug giant leaves to cushion your fall to the best of your ability. .Â
 Barely any time was left for you to shake the disorienting motion sickness off, you couldnât even attempt to run into the accepting, protective hands of the forest before whoever just shot at you was onto you, harshly gripping your arms and raising you up.Â
Fatherâs gonna be so mad if he finds out. Shit, I gotta get out of this.Â
But⌠Avatars? In full camo, armored, even. You hadnât heard of this from anybody in camp!
âDamn! Didnât actually think youâd be able to land the shot from all of that tree, man! Up-top!â
Two of them high-fived, you were actually going to be sick.Â
Thumb between his belt and stomach, another Avatar strutted towards you. The saunter and confidence meant that he was their leader. âNow, now⌠What do we have here?â
âA native.â You were being pushed down on your knees, one hand being grabbed and shown like a trophy. Just how many were there? You couldn't calm yourself enough to focus! âFour fingers.â
The speaker this time was a woman. âHow unusual. Those monkeys donât leave their coven at night.âÂ
âWhere were you flying, little bird?â The leader, a sleazy smirk on his face, leaned down to take a good look at you. âLeading away from the nest, perhaps?â
âShe donât understand, Colonel, donât bother. Ya think Sully could ever manage teaching one word of English to those?â
âWatch how she learns in three seconds.â He yanked on your queue so hard you saw white light in this hour of darkness â and when your vision came back, a screen with your fatherâs face was being shoved to your face. âJake Sully. Toruc Mactoe. Where is he?â
You screamed when he pulled with increasing strength, keeping up with the act you didnât understand. And the state of pain and terror massively helped, contributing to you looking frantic and lost, only knowing that you were being zapped to your core.Â
âSeems like I donât need to ask you.â His fingers snapped your head back to get a good look at your earpiece, late to notice you had it on at all because of the dark. âCan directly ask the man himself.âÂ
All you could form to think was, âFatherâs gonna kill me for this. Heâs actually gonna kill me this time.â
You weren't terrified of what the Avatars would do to you. You were afraid of him.
One empty shell from the reloaded machine gun flew away, tinkling hollow when it fell down, and rolled until it stopped in a small pool of water that had formed on the jagged ground of the cave systems. In the scarlet and orange glow of the campfire heâd haphazardly put together right outside of their home out of impatience after Neytiri had basically thrown him out, Jake almost mistook the liquid for blood.Â
An ominous cloud of dread settled on his shoulders, a paranoia every father tended to go through.
âBig Brother, this is Devil Dog. State your status, over.â
Neteyam didnât miss a beat to answer, thankfully. âDevil Dog, this is Big Brother. Iâm still en route to Foxcove, over.â
âHow much longer?â
âTen minutes at best, sir. Over.â
What he wanted to say was how come he hadnât met you halfway, but it was empty talk. No need to stress the boy out. âDevil Dog signing out.â
This girl was half the reason for the wrinkles on his forehead, Jesus Christ. He was basically waiting you out like a father sitting in the dark to ambush his daughter who had snuck out at night, for that single glorious moment of yeah thatâs right, you got caught, after the light would come on to ruin that moment of relief of successfully making it back in.Â
His mate had scolded him to be nice and understanding, a Marine was anything but, the closest he could compromise was not being as mean to you than he had to be. Sassing, âSo how was your Iknimaya?â like he planned was out the window â Neytiri was spot-on to say the girl would simply give the same mean energy right back at him, and that could only mean another erupting volcano of a fight and a good nightâs sleep ruined for him, overthinking where he went wrong and how else he could have salvaged the situation.Â
Heâd just make you tend to the ikrans for a week for some patience practice, cleaning shit for hours on a daily basis would certainly throw the temporary whim of the rite of passage hyperfixation out of your system. The possibility of you shouting you hated him was unavoidable, but Jake had to get his point across, no matter how terribly it nauseated him to hear something like that from his child.Â
It was strange to remember he couldnât care less for what people thought of him in the past. Some shithead he wouldnât give a ratâs ass about hated Jakeâs guts? Good. He was living in their head rent free, it was fun even â Neytiri too, Jake absolutely enjoyed her hating game at first.Â
Being legitimately resented by his very own child, though, was a heartbreak he didnât expect to hurt him the way it did, knocking air off his lungs the first time he heard it. A burning stab right in his heart that wouldnât go away until he had to hear it for himself you hadnât meant any of what you said.
Because that said hate actually stemmed from hurt Jake must have inflicted. Because you could actually despise him, and never allow him to reconnect with you again if he could ever manage to garner the courage to reach out to you â a mightier challenge than hunting Toruk in the sense it actually scared him.  Â
His teenage daughter. Scared him.Â
Jake didnât know what to do about it, he couldnât even show what exactly this made him feel, too ashamed and proud for it in the first place.Â
The growing distance between you and him was an uneasy, frightened bird he tried to shush and calm in his heart in favor of other pressing matters that drilled small holes in the depths of his stomach, and over time, those little holes had fused together to create one big pit with greater gravitational pull than the sun â until Jake didnât know how to stitch them back together anymore.Â
He told himself he would talk to you later, for sure. The morning after every argument, every fight, every jab from you he snapped at he would try to make amends for, definitely.Â
And then he didnât.Â
âWhat is this, are you palulukan ambushing prey? I told you to make up with her, not prepare for hunting.â
Jake shook his head, dropping the machine gun back inside the crate. The warmed metal was some sort of consolation to his nerves. Marine habit. Always felt safer with a gun near. (Or was it the American in him?) âNeytiri,â he acknowledged, bobbing his head. âIâm just passing time.â
âWhat do you think will happen when she comes back and sees you waiting for her like this?â
Ah, like the old times when Jake couldnât do one thing right in her eyes. âYes, maâam,â he said playfully, but with no mirth behind it, closing the crate with a muffled thunk. With nothing to do with them, one elbow went to his knee and the other handâs fingers started a rhythm on the lid heâd just shut.Â
His mateâs hand gingerly came down on his shoulder, kneading the nerves. âJust talk to her, MaâJake.â
âI donât know how to,â he admitted, he covered her fingers on her shoulder with his, and she immediately held his hand back. âDonât know what to even tell her.â He gave an exhale from the deeper, tired parts of his soul, gazing at the path leading away from their tent. âWith Neteyam and Loâak, itâs easy. I tell âem what to do and theyââ
Neytiri took a seat next to him, gathering their hands together. âSuffer just the same.â Jake was about to brush her off, but she didnât relent. âWhat youâre doing is hurting them.â
This now was about all of their children rather than you, specifically. Neytiri was trying to get him to see the bigger picture first before moving to cover what he did wrong with each child of his, they had had this conversation countless times before.Â
Here we go again, Jake thought.
âDoesnât matter if thatâs what it takes to keep them safe.â
âDoes it?â Neytiri leaned in, and calmness washed over him despite the disturbing nature of what she was saying. âDoes it keep them safe? Or push them to act out more, get in worse situations?â
He grimaced. âI have toââ
âYou feel like you have to.â His mate shook their clasped hands, rattling his bones. âI keep my children safe with trust and honesty. Transparence, MaâJake. So that they listen to me when I mean it because they See me. You shut them out.â Her lips bared to show her pearly teeth as she was practically beseeching him. âYou donât get your childrenâs trust by treating them like a squad.â
âThey trust me plenty.â
âThey trust Oloâeyktan. Toruk Makto. What about their father?â
âI make sure theyâre safe.â Neytiri dropped his hands with an agitated snarl, she thought they were back at the beginning again, he couldnât make her truly understand no matter what he did. He poured his heart out through their tsaheylu everytime, but her values and beliefs were wired so differently from his at the end of the day. âI make sure they stay where I want them to stay for their own good.â Jake shook his head, his voice soft, hushed. No force behind it when Neytiri was heated in return. âOne day theyâll understand.â
âThey wonât if you never tell them.â
âTell them what?â Jake asked. âThat Iâm being harsh on them to prepare them for war? You think theyâll take it seriously after this?â
âNaâvi were in war long before you. There will be wars after you. No parent sullied his childâs happiness for the price of becoming a warrior. You still donât get our ways even after all these years.âÂ
âThe sky peopleâs way,â Jake emphasized with his arms. âI have to teach them how they think, what they go through, so they know what theyâll be facing, okay? I canât simply teach them by telling them.â
âYouâre deluding yourself, Jake. Contradicting.â Neytiri was gentle in her cruelty, the flickering flames burned less than her amber eyes. âTuk and Kiri are getting none of this. I know your heart isnât allowing you. Why canât you do the same for your other children?â
Because he had gone too far already with the older three.Â
Trial and error.Â
He couldnât take back the things he did and say back â and quite honestly? Jake was being pulled from all sides to sit down and rethink his parenting. All he thought anymore was how to protect his family, frequent nightmares of losing his children in gruesome ways were haunting his every step.Â
A father protects his children, thatâs what gives him meaning.Â
Jake had his own desperate ways to do so. Â
He opened his mouth to say something back, anything, but was interrupted by the communication line coming on. âDad.âÂ
Jake immediately knew something was wrong, body sitting ramrod straight. If the frantic breathing and barely controlled voice wasnât any indication of it, his eldestâs behavior was. Neteyam didnât slip up in the codenames like Loâak did, dropped all formalities only when he was borderline panicking. Â
âDad. Iâm sorry, dad, sir, I canât find her, dad, Iâve looked everywhere around here, I thought maybe she was hiding underwater, behind rocksâbut I canât, I canâtâ.â
âSlow down.â Jake could barely contain his own panic rising from the state his son was in. The boy wasnât able to see it, but he couldnât stop himself from leaning in as if Neteyam was right in front of him, and started gesturing with his hand. âSlow down, son.â
âDadââ
Jake tsk-ed. âNeteyam, slow. Slow.â
Neytiri took his elbow. âWhat is it?â
He told her to wait with his gaze, and turned his attention back to Neteyam. This could only mean one thing, he was praying to be wrong â needed clarification. âNow tell me calmer. Whatâs going on?â
âSheâs never been here. She never came here in the first place. Thereâs no sign of her. No trace. Iâve tracked.â
Jakeâs instant response was fear. Domineering, ice-cold, cutting fear. Bodily and emotionally both. You were clockwork, similar to him in having unchanging routines and patterns. Angry? Went for a walk. Depressed? No talking to anyone until it passed. Happy? Wanted to go to the forest to spend time with your siblings and always craved sweet fruit. Didnât want to be around anyone? Hid in the little bioluminescent cove with a pond two little mountains away, always. Always. Â
Neytiri sensed this, observing the change of demeanor in him.âMaâJake?â
âOkay, son.â He seized back control. One missing child was enough. âStay right there and donât move. Iâll contact you.â
âYes, sir.â
âJake,â Neytiri hissed finally, at the end of her ropes.
âShe didnât go to the cove,â he said, face icy neutral as always, but his eyes showed dizzying concern. Neytiri put a hand on her mouth as Jake wasted no time in changing channels. âNight Owl, this is Devil Dog. Come in.â He couldnât even wait two seconds before trying again. âNight Owl, what is your status? Where are you?âÂ
Silence.
The more fear dug deeper into his skin, the more his anger and annoyance soared up, his tail was whipping the air erratically, the finger on the earpiece could send the metal right into his brain with how hard he was pressing on it. âI know you can hear me. This is no time for playing games. You know what you did to your brother? Do you know how panicked he was, not being able to find youââÂ
Then Jake remembered what Neytiri advised, he didnât change strategies because she was right next to him to dig his eyes out, but because his heart was picking up its pace by the second. âTell me where you are, Iâll leave you alone, I promise, alright? If youâre somewhere open, get to safety, Iâm only asking this from you. Or elseââ
âDonât.â Neytiri raised a warning finger at him, voice just above a whisper so they could hear their daughter if she decided to cut in. âThreaten her.â
He couldnât stop her from snatching the communication device off of him. âMaâite, itâs mom. Can you talk to me at least?â
His ears twitched at picking up on you responding, not quite making out the words. Â
Jakeâs eyes shut close for a long time as his whole eyebrow line migrated upwards, he physically had to get a few steps between him and the earpiece so the obliviating worry thatâd almost blinded him wouldnât cause him to say something heâd greatly regret later. He could feel himself deflating. A migraine could be coming anytime soon.
You wouldnât even acknowledge his existence but the moment your mother interrupted, you did? Fine. Fine. He didnât care. Jake could live with it. At least you were alive.
A rippling shudder shook him the moment that thought hit him, an image of you lying dead in a ditch, pale blue, flashing in his mind, he had to run a hand down his face.Â
When Jake looked back, irked by the silence, he found Neytiri standing completely stock-still. And all of a sudden, her petrifying glare was on him, ears pinned all the way back, hands gradually starting to tremble.Â
âNeytiri?âÂ
She wordlessly handed him the device, and with a deep frown, Jake put it back in his ear.Â
âHi there Corporal, you hear me? Yeah, I know you do. As much as Iâm charmed by the fatherly love I could give you a big old sloppy wet kiss, we have unfinished business.â
And the ground disappeared right under Jakeâs feet, plunging him into hell itself.
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4, 17, 32, 27
Thanks for asking, Irma!! You're the best đ
4. Do you have any OCs? Do you have a story for them?
Not really ÂŻ\_(ă)_/ÂŻ a lot of my reader characters kind of live as self-inserts/OCs in my headâI'll give them back stories and have headcanons about them and stuff but I try to keep the actual reader-insert characters as vague as I can, especially when it comes to physical descriptions.
17. Past or present tense? Why?
I started writing in past tense when I was first working on Office Romance and switched halfway through. I personally think present tense is more impactful when you're writing reader-insert, and it's also comes way more naturally to me, but I don't mind reading past tense.
27. Do you agree that one shouldn't start a story with a piece of dialogue?
I didn't even know that was a rule, lol. I think if you're writing a book you might want to avoid it just because it might not be the most effective or impactful way to introduce a setting for a story, but it's never bothered me in fanfiction.
32. Do you have a word/expression that you always use in your writing?
oh my gosh, I feel like I'm repeating myself all the time when I write, and then I search for those words in my documents and I've only used them once đŹ I really like the words shudder, damp, and heavy though, so I think those end up in a lot of my writing
Writing Asks đ
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i will soften every edge, hold the world to its best | 1
summary ;; As Jake Sully's oldest daughter, you never see eye to eye with him, always challenging him and pushing his buttons to the limit. What happens when things go too far one day?
[PART 2]
pairings ;; dad!jake sully x reader, mom!neytiri x reader, sully family x reader
genre ;; pure angst and family feels
notes / explanations ;; welcome to the labor of my daddy issues and my very own therapy. this fic is inspired by this one by @layonatanvi and I only wanted to borrow the running away from home to get an ikran idea/prompt! Please excuse my mistakes if you see any.
Thereâs a widespread belief among sky people that every first-born daughter is a direct copy of her father.Â
You listened in on your own father complaining to your mother about this privately one time; according to him, this was why you guys kept banging hammerheads like 'angtsĂŹks.Â
Loâak was his troublemaker, yes, but you were the rebel pain in his ass, wouldnât stop questioning one tiny simple step he made, never took anything seriously when he needed you to be on top of things hundred percent of the time... Even your younger brother knew boundaries after he was given the stink eye, but you hadnât stopped testing him every single goddamn day after the sky people had come back.Â
His youngest son and oldest daughter were nearly identical in the speed they got him seeing red, but the similarities ended there. Loâak would go behind him to cause trouble, and you would do it right to his face, that fearlessness and defiance made you more dangerous than your brother in your fatherâs opinion. Â
His blood pressure skyrocketing was reserved for Loâak and the shenanigans he knew right away the boy was getting into, and you got his explosive anger the moment you would open your mouth to defy him â he couldnât talk to you, a normal conversation even about your motherâs cooking wasnât possible without you being passive-aggressive and things snowballing from there.Â
(âThis is delicious Neytiri, thank you for the food. Sturmbeest?â
âSturmbeest meat ran out like two weeks ago, father. You ask this everyday and mom answers the same everyday.â
Cue him reprimanding you for talking to him like that, you saying maybe he should greenlight a hunt soon to calm his nerves and promptly being sent to your room. It was Neteyam whoâd saved some food for you that night.)
If only you would stop talking back to him and listen for once, heâd said, pacing in the tent with hands on hips like an agitated viperwolf as mother watched on, most likely tired from going through this loop for yet another day. You are the older sister to Loâak, Kiri and Tuk, why canât you be a role model for them like Neteyam is?Â
(Mom had given him the flattest, âShe is at the age for such behavior, MaâJake, weâve talked about this. Let her be.â)
In your defense, he didnât make sense sometimes, what harm was there in wanting him to explain the thought process behind his decisions?
Apparently you simply were prohibited from doing that to the Oloâeyktan.Â
But he was father, he was your family. Why did that have to be disrespect?Â
He wasnât like this before.
A small part of you was aware this was you lashing out because you missed your father â the lighthearted rock in your life, the big shadow protecting you from the heat of the world, who knew how to smile and show his love before all of this. Now he was just the leader of the clan, the weight of the revered Toruk Makto on his shoulders made him a total stranger you didnât recognize.Â
He barely ever called you sweetheart anymore, punishing you for being a brat, most likely. You tried to act like it didnât hurt.Â
But it did. You missed him dearly when he was right in front of you. The rest of the family did, too, they just didnât say it out loud the way you expressed through what you called standing up to him â in reality, it was a statement about the man he had become, father couldnât read between the lines to understand.
Mom did.Â
She would always explain he did it out of love and worry, and his every move had a reason behind it after the scoldings ended. It was as if she saw right through the prickly exterior of her eldest daughter.
Her love wasnât held back like his was, not shared like military MREs at decided moments in a day in between attacks, raids, meetings and duties. Hers were long touches, hugs, kisses on your temple, shared time and hunts together, her letting you ride on her ikran with her, the warmth of a meal and soft smiles; whilst his was randomly asking how you were after training and where youâve been if he caught onto your absence sometimes. He didnât have time for you or your siblings except for Tuktuk these days. Thatâs why you were now a mamaâs girl.
Sooner or later, the breaking point was finally bound to arrive.Â
Yours did after a particularly heated-up fight about your rite of passage. You had had enough of father postponing it when Loâak, younger than you, had already gained his own ikran and gone through uniltaron. He was present in the tent while you were fussing and debating with your immovable mountain of a father only answering with single syllable responses, and his light snickers made you all the more aggressive. He got a strong jab from Kiri after a loud snort. Â
Kiri, you could get. She was built different from the start â got her mount earlier than anybody else, just walked up to it and asked. Besides, the girl wasnât a dick about it like Loâak was.Â
âYou arenât ready yet,â father answered the more you asked him. You thought he'd say a different thing the hundredth time, but he didn't. âYour brother was.â
Loâak puffed his chest at that, desperate for a drop of recognition as always, and you could only roll your eyes. âSo you think Iâm weak? Iâm not strong enough?â
Father sighed at the provocation. âThatâs not what Iâm saying. This and being ready are two different things.â
âHow are they different? If Iâm on top of my training, that means Iâm ready.â
âPhysically ready, and mentally ready are not the same.â
âHow can I not be mentally ready, Iâve already seen what happensââ
âEnough!â He stood up, towering above you and leaning in slightly. Your younger brother had stopped smiling so quickly you almost let a laugh escape you, and father got agitated when he saw that, thinking you were making fun of him. âSome donât return from the dream hunt. Do you understand? The strongest sometimes donât return from that. Your mind needs to be strong.â
âAnd mine isnât?â
He gave a slow exhale through his nose, not actually wanting to say it for some reason. âNo it isnât.â
âWhy?â
There it is. Your signature phrase. âWhy?â
And it made your father look above, asking silently for patience from Eywa as it always did.Â
âMaâite, why donât we take a break, hm? Come walk with me,â your mom interrupted, taking your hand and standing next to you, your four fingers got enveloped in her larger, warmer grip, strong and insistent.Â
âNo, I wanna hear it. What do you think makes me not ready?â
You insinuating that your father was entirely going off his own wrong opinion and not knowing any better set him off. You saw the change from ticked off to borderline on edge, but instead of giving into it, he turned his back on you and went back to cleaning his gun, movements choppy and harsh. âThat immaturity for a start.â
And you hissed at himâactually hissed at him when none of your siblings would ever dare to talk back to him during a lecture.Â
The audible gasps, the holding of breaths, and the slow turn of your fatherâs head looking like he was going through confusion of reality upon being hit on the head had followed. His eyes narrowed and the lines of his eyebrows got gradually lower on his face, his form seemingly expanding in mass from building anger, spine slowly straightening after fully comprehending what you just did.
âIâm way past you giving me attitude missy,â his baritone and low voice was so steady that youâd rather him yell at you like usual, but he was scarily calm, pushing you to raise your chin righteously at him to show you werenât bothered by him none, but your ears betrayed you by cowering flat and taut against your skull. âBut youâre hissing at your father now? Hm? You think this right here is gonna get you the respect you think you deserve?â
âYou donât listen,â you said, ignoring your heart trashing away from how coldly father was to you. âDisrespect,â your fingers quoting in the air resulted only in making him angrier. Neteyam to his right, silent and observant the whole argument, was furiously shaking his head that the beads in his braids were clicking loudly. âis the only way you ever pay attention to anything anymore. See? Look how sharp you are right now. Mission accomplished, I guess.âÂ
âBroâŚâ Loâak, frightened by the wide eyed glare father was giving you, weakly protested, but you knew he would never be able to interfere in the verbal struggle between you and father the way you did to his.Â
âYou will go to your room,â father said between his teeth, âDo not let me see your face. I swear to EywaâNeytiri, get her outta here.â
âDo you ever want to see our faces anymore, father?âÂ
A beat.Â
Mom gasped your name in shock, grabbing your arm this time as if she wanted to drag you away.Â
All his fury froze away immediately. âWhat did you just say?âÂ
You just stared at him.Â
âThatâs enough,â your mother snapped at you, but you didnât hold it against her, she was more worried about what would follow if this went on. âCome on, weâre leaving.â
âOkay.â Father slowly shook his head, the storm brewing right under his skin got you preparing for the impact, and all the kids flinched when he threw the unloaded gun back in the crate. âYou know so much, donât you? Youâre smart, wise. Know better than Tsahik herself. Fine, you get your way. Go.â
You froze. âWhat?â
âYeah, go. Get yourself an ikran.â
âFatherââ
âDonât father me. Go on. Iâm not stopping you. Since youâre so ready and youâll say just about anything to get what you want, who am I to get in your way, huh?âÂ
But you didnât want it to be like this. Iknimaya was supposed to be something exciting, prideful â a ceremony. He was saying it like you were being thrown out. Who was going to paint your face? Be proud of you?Â
âWhy are you just standing there?â He poked your crushed ego further, confident in the fact that you wouldn't set one foot outside of the cave systems at this hour of the day. âDidnât you want this?â
You didnât want this.Â
âDad, itâs the middle of the night,â Kiri said, appalled, not quite believing her ears.Â
âWhat does it matter?â He showed you in mock pride, up and down that you couldnât stop the tears from stinging the corners of your eyes. âMighty hunter here is ready.â
âJake,â your mother warned in such a threatening tone that he stopped and shifted on his feet, almost uneasy.Â
âWhat? If she doesnât want a fatherâs concern Iâm not giving it to her.â
Like you werenât standing right in front of him at all.Â
âJake!â
That was the final straw. You wrenched your arm free from momâs iron grip and screamed, âI hate you!â at the top of your lungs at him before storming off the tent.
His ears flattening was the last thing you paid attention to as everything became a blur because of tears swelling. Yeah, right. You wished you could hurt him, unfortunately he was too much of a wall for that. You bet he was scoffing at your declaration right now.
Your body thought faster than your brain did even when the emotions had you drowning under the current, deciding you were going to sneak off to the ikran rookery tonight. You knew he would send Neteyam after you â him barking, âFollow your sister,â at the boy right after you hid yourself between the rocks surrounding the tent was the confirmation of the hypothesis. He was to make sure you didnât leave High Camp.Â
Everyone in your family knew your favorite hiding spot to cool off, Neteyam of course was heading there automatically, and it was the headstart you needed to get a move on.Â
Fine. You would complete your iknimaya yourself without anybodyâs support, as if these things had any value anymore with how military heâd conditioned the clan to be. You were going to make him eat his words for humiliating you.
The muffled of father drifting off flared up your determination as you soundlessly sneaked off. "Jesus, I've spoiled her too much..."
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i will soften every edge, hold the world to its best | 3
summary ;; Sullys stick together. You learn the hard way what happens when you don't.
PART 2 | PART 4
pairings ;; dad!jake sully x reader, mom!neytiri x reader, sully family x reader
genre ;; pure angst and family feels
notes / explanations ;; descriptions of blood and violence incoming, beware! shout out to the ppl who predicted the stuff in this chapter LMAO
so um... i couldnt tag everybody who asked when i said i would... there's apparently a limit to how many people you can tag. please forgive me đ im not taking any tagging requests anymore since i cant do it. so sorry about that,,,, seriously
also, thank you so much for 1160 followers! i still cant fucking believe it... daddy issues solidarity đ¤đťđ¤đť
âHi there Corporal, you hear me? Yeah, I know you do. As much as Iâm charmed by the fatherly love I could give you a big old sloppy wet kiss, we have unfinished business.â
Rain covered the rustling of clothes and the click-clacks of readjusted weapons as concentrated silence hung in the air, thick and heavy like the morning mist swallowing up the forest.
No answer.Â
What face could your parents be making right now? Heartbeat in your ears, you tried to hide your shame by looking down, but a jerk on your queue set you straight. the avatar holding you digging his gun sharper in your neck.   Â
âWhat, cat got your tongue all of a sudden?â The leaderâs stare found yours. âLet me give you a quick remedy.âÂ
Theyâd linked your device into another for the sound to be relayed outside and the voice detection range could be wider, in other words, they wanted your father to hear what was happening to you. Your braid was yanked as if the one pulling it wanted to snap it right off your skull, no amount of training could stop the scream torn out of you â all the show just for him.Â
The line was deadly still, save for some rustling, crackling static that you could have easily mistaken for hissing.
A ghost of a smile shadowed the manâs face, he extended his rifle to tip your chin up. âGuess weâre gonna have to be louder than that to wake daddy up sweetheart.âÂ
âStop!â Father yelled, the unexpected timing of it made you jump. That earned him a group chuckle from the avatars around you. âStop.â
He talked. He didnât leave you to fend for yourself in this. Thank Eywa!
âThat was fast,â the captor behind you said.Â
âThought youâd have forgotten English by now, playing native.â
â...Quaritch?âÂ
Quaritch. That awful, awful man from the stories your mother killed? Spiderâs father? But⌠But he was dead. How could sky people know how to cheat death?
âIn the flesh.âÂ
Fatherâs voice wavered, youâd think he was scared if you didnât know any better. âThatâs impossible.â
âBack from the grave just for you, Jake.â
âThen Iâll just have to put you right back where you belong.â
The squad of avatars openly laughed at that, boisterous, confident, arrogant.Â
This was Toruk Makto they were openly mocking. None of them would last for one minute in front of him and yetâ
âQuite the teary lovers reunion weâre havinâ here, but you got busy while I was gone, huh?â He looked down at you again, yellow eyes filled with mirth. âI have this tiny bird here we plucked right out of the air. Imagine my surprise to learn sheâs yours. Is this the only one, or you got yourself a litter now?â
Silence again.Â
âWhat do you want?â
âStraight to the point as always.â The smug smile momentarily twitched into an unamused, withheld resentment. This man was nearing the end of his capacity to keep taunting. âI donât think Iâll tell yet. You know I love to be a tease.â
Your ears rotated upwards in treacherous hope at your father's next words. âIf you touch one hair on my daughterâs head I swear to godââ
âYou exchanged your god for this shithole, Jake. Letâs not kid ourselves now.â Any hint of playing around was gone, now, eyes fixated on something on the ground ahead. âYour daughter will be my guest for a while. Think of it as summer vacation. Donât worry, unlike the Naâvi, weâre very hospitable.â His thumb brushed over a button. âUntil next time.â
âFucking bastardââ
With one beep, the call was over. Quaritch was touching the band around his neck this time. âIron Sky, Blue on Actual. We are standing by for extract, over.âÂ
You began to tussle against the avatar behind your back. âNo! No! Let me go!âÂ
âBe advised. We're bringing in a high value prisoner.â
âDadâs really gonna flay her alive this time, I canât wait.â Loâak, positioned just behind the flap of the tent to not be seen from the outside as he peeked with one eyeball just in case, was watching his parents vehemently yell at each other in whispers that started out loud, but got hushed probably to not reach him and his siblings. Aggressive limb gestures were flying in the air, and at one point, his mom had tried to run off somewhere and was forcefully stopped.Â
Dad was currently pacing around like a wild animal with one hand permanently stuck rubbing his face, and mom turned away from him, holding her forehead. âTheyâre really going at it, huh?
Kiri was not amused with his insistence to breach their privacy. âWhatâs so interesting about watching this kind of thing?â
âCatharsis?â He remarked in English, feeling sophisticated. âYou remember Spider talking about it? Purification and emotional cleansing through relief that youâre not going through the horrible tragedy, the character on stage is.âÂ
âYouâre normally so dumb.â Loâak bore his fangs at her matter-of-fact tone of voice. âYour brain only comes back on when itâs about chaos.â
âIâm petty, and what about it?â A tilt of his head to dare Kiri to ask for her point, then his attention was thwarted by an incomprehensible cry from his mother. She was pushing dad from his arms, furious like Loâak had never seen before as the upset man tried to hold her more. âLook at mom and dad breathing fire at each other! You think theyâre discussing how to punish her?â
âStop spying already skxawng, mom will be angry if she sees you. Weâre supposed to be in bed.â
âShut up, Iâm trying to listen here!â His ears were tilting at every angle to make out any words that reached to him as nothing but a cluster of broken sounds. âWhy did they have to go far?âÂ
âBecause they wanted to be away from peeping toms like you?â
âAnd youâre still here too, so?â Loâak gave his sister a meaningful look. âI know you wanna see too.â
âUgh!â Kiri shoved out her tongue at him, eyes dead. âAnd itâs not funny, by the way! They are fighting. Stop being happy about it.â
He knew they were fighting about his older sister, and that sheâd get all the heat and fallout from it the moment she was back. Loâakâs head was full of what he could get out of it, or what to ask her for in return for helping her out in her detention. So satisfying to be the sibling who wasnât in trouble. He should do it more, actually. âIt is funny when itâs not about me.âÂ
âYouâre sick for taking joy in anotherâs suffering.â
âOh, Iâm doomed, then.â Kiri took whatever fat was on his thin arm between her thumb and forefinger, and twisted. Loâak had to blink away the tears that rushed to his eyes, snatching his limb away from the displeased girl and pushing her away in return â he was annoyed at how much that hurt, why was that so damaging for no reason? âYeouch! What the hell?â
âWill it kill you to practice mindfulness once in a while?âÂ
He raised his voiceâs pitch to mock the wobbly, ear-scratching whine of yours, and exaggerated his body movements to match, too. âI hate you!â Â
âGross.â She tried to shove him, he caught her hands in the air, pushing her back and getting the spiteful annoyance of his sister as a result. âDad was actually hurt by that.â Loâakâs eyes could roll down the hills by themselves the way that sounded, but Kiri, as always, was bothered so inexplicably. âI donât like this. I have a bad feeling.â
That bad feeling was the herald of dadâs upcoming cranky ill-temper and what would follow after you inevitably had to come crawling back home with tail between your legs, Neteyam dragging you from the scruff of your neck. Loâak was refusing to sleep so he could enjoy the fight.Â
âMe personally, am over the moon, ikran duty is so gonna be off my hands. For months.â He halted at the idea that just went off in his head, tail swishing with the hype. âI wanna tell Spider. Iâll go get him.â
âAbsolutely not. You sneak off now and theyâll laser-focus all the anger on you!â Kiri was pointing a warning hand at him, but slowly lowered it, one corner of her mouth twitching up. She was holding back amusement. âHey, you know what? Nevermind, you can go. I want you to go. I have to see this.â
âHa-ha.â Loâakâs tail stuttered, losing enthusiasm. âAttempted murder, much?â
âGuys, whatâs going onâŚâ
Upon the unexpected voice that wobbled its way into their conversation, they both looked down to see Tuk gripping her weaved blanket with one hand and dragging it on the floor as she made her way to them, the other rubbing her eyes one by one so sleep dripping from them would fly away.
âSee, you woke her up! What do we do now?â
âYou woke her up by yelling, why is it my fault now?â
âI didnât, youââ
âDid too.â
âDid not.â
âDid too.â
âDid nââ
âGuysâŚâ Tuk pulled on Kiriâs hand, and the foreign object she was clutching the whole time distracted Loâak. It must have dug into the older oneâs skin that she carefully picked it up to inspect. The ear pieces they took off before they went to sleep. This one was Kiriâs. âNeteyamâs calling. You didnât hearâŚâ
Grinning, Loâak snatched it up and skipped backwards and put it in his own ear, ignoring Kiriâs hushed yells to give it back now and the groans about ruining it with his stinky, cheesy earwax. He had to keep bouncing around, the girl was chasing him around the tent. âBro! Tell her sheâs sooo dead. Dadâs literally keeping guard in front of the tentââ
âLoâak, quit it.â Neteyamâs tremulous answer was harsh. Loâakâs smile wavered as he dodged Kiriâs arm and jumped over discarded cups on the floor, knocking over wooden spoons. âI need you to tell me whatâs happening over there.â
âAw, babyâs so scared to come back she needs to make a game plan first?â He laughed, slapping Kiriâs hands away. âIâll only tell if she gives back my karambit knife.â
His older brother sighed, a bit too exasperated.Â
âYeah, Iâm not letting that one go and Iâm also making it your problemââ
âLoâak, she isnât here.â
He stopped dead in his tracks. âWhat?â
âShe isnât here. I couldnât find her.â Kiri bumped into him, unable to stop herself at the right time to hit the brakes due to how abruptly Loâak had stilled. Theyâd almost tumbled over. âDad told me to wait until he contacts her and Iâve been waiting for minutes. Now tell me whatâs going on over there.â
âBro, youâre serious?â
âWhy wouldnât I be serious, skxawng!âÂ
He turned to Kiri in disgusted discomfort, who had damn-near glued her own ear to his to hear better. âForget months, Iâll be free for years. Dadâs not gonna let her take one step off the camp anymore.â
The girl would stomp her foot if she was a couple years younger. âWhatâs this about?â
And Neteyam would shake Loâak from the neck for ignoring him this long while he was fussing. âTell me already youâ!â
âTheyâre having a fight bro.â He leaned better to peep outside the tent. âYeah.â
âShe came back? Why didnât you tell me?â
It was uncommon for Neteyam to completely disregard the previous input heâd been given. Loâak didnât understand this level of anxiety. âAre you having a brain fart? Would we be having this conversation if she was here? Itâs mom and dad who are fighting.â
It wasnât that serious â on the contrary, his sister was quite simple to understand. She didnât want to be found and had changed her place of hiding. End of story. The golden boyâs worrywart nature was keeping him from reasoning.Â
âDonât be a smartass.â Loâak practically felt Neteyamâs want to land a loud smack on his back. âWere they only able to reach her, then? Is that why theyâre fighting?â
âYouâre asking me?ââ
The older boy began to grumble under his breath. âThis is why I called Kiri.â
Said girlâs ears perked up over picking her name from the static-surrounded line. Loâak snorted. âOuch, bro.â
Kiri shook him from the elbow. âMe? What about me?â
âGreat title for your autobiography.â
Kiri raised her arms to give him a beating and Loâak was already bolting away from anywhere near her vicinity. The siblings didnât even take notice of the line with Neteyam going dark as they focused on their own play-scuffle for a while.Â
Until Loâak bumped into someone.
It wasnât Tuk.Â
Shoulders pulled into himself, he turned around torturously freaked out to find dad standing there like a ghost, his tactical vest packed to the brim and gun hanging from his back the way they wore their bows.Â
The blue of his skin had faded into an ashier tone, amber eyes wide and bloodshot, the veins on the normally put together Oloâeyktanâs forehead were bulging, even a socially clueless person would pick up something was seriously wrong. He commanded cold authority of the battlefield simply by the way he stood, immediately triggering Loâak into soldier mode. Â
He took a few steps back, chin hanging low at the lightless, unblinking stare his father pushed down on him. âSir.â
All the sleepiness that had Tuk unresponsive and nodding off through Loâak and Kiriâs push-and-pull was knocked out of her at the sight, she was now unnerved and frightened. âDad?â
The manâs intensity was somehow eased by his youngestâs reaction, but he held back from taking her in his arms like he normally would to comfort her, didnât even care to remark on how they were supposed to be sleeping â how theyâd woken their little sister up, instead focusing on Loâak. âI want you all to listen well. Your mother and I are heading out for a minute and your grandmother will be with you soon â Neteyam is Oscar-Mike to come back here. Stay put and donât go anywhere, understand?â His finger pointed accusingly at him. âDonât cause trouble. Looking at you boy, what Iâm saying here is Marine proof. Iâm at the end of my wits here, donât even think about slipping a tail out of this tent.âÂ
The potent severity of whatever the hell was making him this agitated to the point of a voice so hoarse it was unrecognizable got the wheels in Loâakâs head whirring. âWhatâs happening, dad?â
âOne child!â The thundering shout came down on him with the force of a falling mountain, making Loâak jump out of his skin. âI need one child of mine to listen to me without asking any questions today!â Dadâs voice broke when Tuk whined, he shut his eyes as if he was in physical pain, and flexed his jaw, shaking his head and pulling the girl in from her shoulders to soothe her. Still no direct hugging. âJesus Christ.â
âIâm sorry sir,â Loâak said immediately, distraught by the over-the-top reaction, hands unknowingly curling into fists by his sides. Whenever that sky people word âJesusâ slipped from dad not having any control between the border of his two languages, the boy knew it was demanding gravitas. âI heard you CFB.â
âGood.â He thinned his lips. âKiri, please.â
Loâak frowned at dad basically asking for her to play her brotherâs keeper in Neteyamâs absence in two simple words.
She nodded. âI know dad.â
He caught a glimpse of his mother running in the distance, her fatherâs bow in her hand.Â
Just what was happening? What had you done?Â
Eywa, it had to be sky people.Â
Dad saw the realization in his face. âStay,â he emphasized, one final time before he was also gone with the wind.Â
Loâak wouldnât have obeyed if it wasnât for his grandmother arriving just in time, keeping them busy with a story about the arrival of a wounded ikran with no rider.
You realized the gunshot wound puncturing your upper abdomen was there the whole time when the avatars put first aid and later slapped a rectangular sky people bandage on it that helped clotting or whatever it was called, the pain simply not being there had played a big factor in it with the body running on pure adrenaline.Â
(Crouching close to you, Quaritch had bragged, âWe arenât so bad after all, huh, sweetheart? Itâs called civilization. Your daddy ever taught you about that?â
Civilization, your ass. They needed you. There was nothing well-meaning about what they were doing.
And the nickname had ticked you off, sullying the good memories of father, your head slammed into his nose in full power after a hiss.
âNow my daddy taught me that!â you spat in English as other avatars had tackled you. The man claiming to be Quaritch was smiling as he wiped away the blood trickling down his nose.
What was the point in trying to patch you up if they were going to do this, then?)
You were now a part of an elaborate trap to lure your father in. Bait. The worst position to be in. This was the kind of trouble Loâak would get himself in. It was too late to go back now, the mess youâd gotten yourself into had made itself known.Â
Think, think! How could you get out of this?
Within the unsleeping forestâs nightly noises chirping all around you, a specific call in the air halted your train of thought.Â
It was mom.Â
Your parents were here. But how? How did they know where you were, exactly? Dread and expectation pooled in your heart, coexisting in a nauseating mix.Â
Father must be thinking that you already caused so much trouble, they couldnât know you were also hurt, youâd never hear the end of it.
But there was no time to think, the pain you should have been feeling was ebbing its way into your body, and she was calling in the night to inform you to get ready.
All hell broke loose when the man who held you tight from your queue was shot right from the back of his head with an arrow, collapsing right on top of you.Â
You couldnât get away in time to not be crushed by his dead body and promptly got squished between the mossy soil and him, his gun was hurting you, the wound on your stomach getting in the way of you using your core to push the body off.Â
How many minutes had passed with you struggling to get him off as a hurricane of bullets roared, you didnât know (it hurt, pain was climbing towards the threshold) â mom was able to break free from the weight of a whole AMP suit, as youâd heard as a child, a Naâvi was naturally strong, but you couldnât even crawl out. Panic was a rope tightening around your ribcage as your breathing picked up
All of a sudden, the weight was gone, and the only remaining thing from it was the big gun left from the avatar you found yourself hugging for dear life, eyes wide as saucers. Before you could see whoever had done that, you got hoisted up right back on your feet and tried to run, only to be held tighter and pulled behind the trunk of a tree.
âHey, itâs me, itâs me!â Clumsy, overwrought hands were cupping your cheeks and â and oh, it was your father.Â
You didnât know whether to be afraid or cry from happiness.
Once he was sure you registered it was him by staring intently in your eyes with that edge of the softness youâd missed so much, his hold shifted to your neck and around your shoulders, and he gave you a look-over, checking for any wounds. Too bad what he was searching for was behind the gun you were holding. âAre you hurt?â He shook you when you were too stunned to answer. âAre you hurt at all?â
âNo,â you shook your head automatically, it was weak against the explosions of bullets raining down all around you, but father had picked it up regardless, only focusing on you for the moment.
In the darkness, nobody could see the blood running down your body, that bandage had come out at one point.Â
âOn my mark, weâre gonna run, okay?â He nodded to you, tomahawk axe in hand coated in a dark substance, commanding your full attention. âFollow me. Ready? Ready?â
You werenât ready at all, stomach feeling like it was being stabbed at every heartbeat, but you couldnât tell him that.Â
Instead, you ran like hell, moored by fatherâs taut clutch on your forearm pulling you forward to match his incredible speed dodging roots, bushes and branches.Â
Things stopped moving only when you were enveloped in momâs embrace, consciousness almost flying off from the relief that washed over you. Kisses were peppered along your hairline and forehead, her mumbling your name in gratitude blending with your panting. Tears burned bitter in your eyes, but you couldnât cry, not when father was looking at you like that, chest rising and falling. You instantaneously remembered why you were holding that gun at the intensity he was radiating, tail escaping between your legs and letting mom hold you.Â
At least this way he wasnât able to objurgate you. Â
Over her shoulder, you saw three ikrans instead of two. Heart soaring, you were skipping towards him in pure astonishment in a heartbeat. âHey buddy!â Â
His head lowered down towards you in bird-like movements. In this angle, it looked like he was giving you a razor sharp-toothed big grin.Â
âHe brought us here,â your mother said. The hand you were going to pet the ikran with stopped midway at her dejected tone. âYou have passed Iknimaya, I take it. On your own.â
You didnât know what to say, feeling immense guilt at having made her this disappointed over it. If this was any normal situation, any normal fight at all, you would have shot back with, âWell father told me to do it.â
But you were tired.Â
Your pain threshold was being threatened, and you needed to get to your grandmother before any of your parents saw the situation you were in and this escalated into the worst fight you were going to get into in your entire life.Â
Fatherâs only response was a dead cold, âCâmon, we gotta get outta here.â
He didnât talk to you after that. Not one word.Â
Squatting on an ikranâs back on a flight with an abdominal gunshot wound you were trying to hide was not an option unless you wanted to pass out midair and was looking for a free dive, so you were all but hugging the poor thingâs neck like a monkey, trusting him to follow your parents while you concentrated on mentally fighting to level out the pain.Â
Nonsensical as it was to believe the gun stuck between your ikranâs neck and your stomach was acting as a tampon to lessen the bleeding, you were concerned with how dumb it must have looked to father and mom, how incompetent they must think of you that their daughter didnât even know how to ride right.Â
Got an ikran for nothing.Â
Would they be less proud of you seeing how funny it appeared, nevermind that it was to contain your pain all the while not trying to faint?
But no words were exchanged about it.Â
Father clamping up right after heâd made sure you werenât hurt (yikes) had resulted in this awkward trip succumbing in total silence. They had sandwiched you between them, only necessary space for the ikrans to beat their wings freely left, so close that you could discern the scariest look on father yet, deepening the lines of age in his face while simultaneously expressing his barely contained desire to kill someone.Â
A ticking time bomb.Â
Forget speaking at all, but not only did he never address you until now, he didnât even look in your direction for once. You knew because staring at him for five minutes straight for him to just acknowledge your existence had proven to be unfruitful.Â
And the tears involuntarily streamed down your cheeks with how utterly worthless and alone that made you feel, trapped in this agony you couldnât help but hide because heâd think you didnât deserve to complain after bringing it upon yourself. You would rather bite your tongue and bear the pain than stay dreading his reaction.Â
Yeah, no, he couldnât know.Â
Mom was looking over at you every one minute to make sure you were okay after her ears picked up on your sniffles, arrows of worry shot from her side sinking down your skin every single time, and you hated to make her this way.Â
Your ikran kept comforting you through tsaheylu until you landed.
Father had promptly jumped down, agile and making haste away somewhere, passing you by and giving the cold shoulder. You all but slid off your own ikran, managing to make the gun stay where it should be, as you couldnât help but weakly call out to him for one drop of consolation. âFatherâŚâ
He didnât stop for you, quickening his steps, but his ears twitched, the tail beating the air ferociously halting and lowering before it returned to the previous motions, and those were the only indications that heâd heard it Lima Charlie.
The man just didnât want to talk to you.   Â
And you had to make yourself believe it wasnât the emotional devastation that had you falling down, but the wound sucking out all your energy now that you had gotten to safety.Â
âMaâite?â Mom rushed to you. âMaâite, whatâs wrong? What is it?â
âIâm okay, mom, itâs okay.â You were sitting on the floor, cross-legged. Thank goodness you still had the unbreakable willpower (and not the fear of Eywa put into you by father) to hold your shit together. âIâm okay. Just tired. My knees buckled. Weak, you know?â You swallowed, smiling. âIâm just⌠Just resting.â
Her gaze full of concern studied you, zeroing in on the gun you clung on for dear life against your stomach. Her hands lovingly brushed your hair, gripped your shoulders and elbows even though you were disgustingly clammy all over. It was grounding, anchoring within the ocean of pain washing over you in waves.Â
âOh, why are you sweating so much? Youâre freezing.â You clutched the gun harder in a panic when she grasped it, most likely to put it away. It was the wrong reaction to have, but you werenât exactly in the position to function healthily.Â
Mom, as any other person would, got suspicious from it, her eyes flying up to your owlish ones â blanked out like a frightened animal. âYouâre fine now,â she whispered, thankfully attributing it to how disturbed you must be, still not out of survival mode. âYou are safe, my daughter. Mom is here.â She cupped your cheek, but every touch to your body hurt now, even when it was away from the gaping wound, still gushing blood, trickling down your hips and getting you scared that itâd be discovered once you stood up. âIâm here.â She searched your soul to know just why you were grimacing at her attempts of comforting. âI will take this now, you do not need it anymore.â
You snapped out of the gradually darkening gray haze momâs lulling was laying you down gingerly into. âNo, please donât,â your breathing hitched. She was going to see. She couldnât see. You had to avoid this somehow, as long as you could. Grandmotherâs tent. You would make it, you had to. âIâll⌠Iâll just sit here for a while, okay? I need to just⌠take a small break, and then Iâll⌠Can you go back? Iâll follow later. Father is angry, I donâtââ
âNonsense.â Incredulous and enraged suddenly about something you couldnât put a finger on, and before you could stop her, she tried to haul you up with her by gripping your upper arms â colors exploded behind your eyelids, getting you you to lose consciousness for two seconds, your vision flooding back in a starry kaleidoscope. When momâs voice reached your ears, it was in staccato exclaims your ears were ringing too much to discern. She was shaking you.Â
You werenât able to sit up straight anymore, leaning forward â mom had caught you, utterly confused and panicked at the same time. And then your head was lying on the crook of her elbow resting on her legs sheâd tucked under herself. The moment youâd switched from sitting to straight up lying down was missing from your memories.Â
A baby being cradled. Yes, this is exactly what it was like. Gentle arms surrounded you amidst the pulsating sea of agony.Â
Your body was letting go, but your arms were vices around the gun, still holding that last line. Donât let go. Donât let go. They canât know. Father will be so mad if he learns. ââm okay⌠âst restinââŚâ
When your eyes cleared enough for the surroundings to be only a bit blurry, your mom was looking at the hand sheâd just tried to take away the gun with, caked with your blood that had stained it, out of it and perplexed like she didnât want to believe it.Â
Her gut-wrenchingly stunned numbness sent the misery clawing its way inside into overdrive, pulling your consciousness down to the earth from the clouds it was ascending to. âNot mine,â you forced out, but it came out as begging. Everything was falling apart. The plan was so simple, why couldnât you do anything right? âNot mine. Please. Mom, itâs okay.âÂ
âNoâŚâ Mumbling, she started sharply swaying back and forth, and with one brutally vigorous attack, she ripped the gun away from your arms, and hurled it away â then it was over. Your sob wasnât due to the motion hurting you, it was all entirely for the broken wail of your mother at seeing the bloodied mess, tears spilling from her eyes as she reached down to press down at the pouring liquid. âNo! No! Oh Great Mother! Why did you hide this! Oh, my daughter!âÂ
âNo, mom, Iâm fine, itâs nothing. Not my blood. Not my blood, okay?â You reached up weakly and wiped at her cheeks with trembling fingers, your heart got crushed worse than the pain could beat you down at her grief â lungs constricting. Where was all the air? âIâll get up. Iâll go to grandmother, donât cry. Just resting.â
Frantically looking around, she yelled, âJake!ââ but her voice didnât quite come out, breathy as if sheâd been punched in the ribcage seconds prior.
A heartbeatâs worth of nothingness, after which you were full-on freaking out. Only one thought: Father will be angry.Â
âNo!â You shrieked, and blood swelled in one strong pump against momâs fingers. She looked down at you in anguish, pupils blown wide, arm tightening around you as if you were a flailing bird. âDonât tell him! Donât tell father! Heâll really kill me for thisââ
âNo, no no no,â she shook her head, frenzied, tone cracked from beginning to end. âDo not say that. Donât you ever say thatââ
But you were struggling in her arms, wanting nothing but to crawl away into a hole, no reason registering whatsoever, only instinct. âHeâll be so angry,â you begged, pleading, pink spit bubbling at the corners of your mouth. The sound of gurgling accompanying the words you forced your whole body to form. âYou canât tell him â you canât! He already hates me!â
The more you thrashed around and kicked your legs, the more you bled.
âPlease, Great Mother!â The more mom lost her mind, hissing and howling hysterically, crazed, hugging you tighter and rocking. âJake! Jake! MaâJake!â She put her temple against yours. âNot my daughter, please, EywaâŚâ
Why was she being like this? It wasnât that serious! You were okay!
Delirium claimed you hot as she kept calling his name and her unbreakable hold on you kept you in a cage of a motherâs despair. In your feverish mind, a threat to your life was coming. Weakness spread like wildfire around your body and chipped away at the pain, slowly picking it apart to replace it with drowsiness. âDonât call âim,â you continued to repeat, over and over again. âIâm just taking a break. Donât call him over. Heâs gonna be angry. Heâll hate me. He hates me. Please, mom.â
The sentences slurred together, shortened, wilted away pitifully, your voice died down, tongue deteriorating into only echoing, âHe hates me.â A withered away, old flute.Â
Your ikran was bellowing in the distance and you looked. The torches on cave walls were illuminating him and finally revealing to you his beautiful color scheme.   Â
And then your father was here, falling to his knees right beside you, his glistening wide eyes flying everywhere around your body â tracing all the blood, hands hovering above you as if he didnât know where to start piecing a shattered vase back together.  Â
It was over.
Fully expecting the chastising you were about to receive to shake the floating mountains so bad the enemy would be able to spot you, you began to apologize â pride be damned, this battle be lost, youâd failed anyway. âPlease donât be mad,â you shuddered, meek and unsteady, tunnel vision flickering at the edges only perceiving him. âItâs my faultâIâm sorryâplease donât be angryââ
âStop talking,â he ordered, rough and harsh, eyebrows knitted tightly, and out of breath â probably because of how hard he was trying to hold the anger back. You knew. That had to be it. âDonât speak.â
Ah of course. This was only natural when he had refused to utter a single word at you the whole way, denying you the temporary comfort of a simple glance.Â
Even the hand he pressed down so ruthlessly firm on your stomach it might as well be a boulder pinning you down was meant to be punishment, the whines your unbreathing lungs couldnât stop turned into yowls â you hadnât even noticed your hands were wrapped around fatherâs wrist in an effort to push him away, scratching him, but he only added his other hand on top of the other in return.
âHang on, sweetheart, I got you, please hang on a little longer,â he pleaded, but you were already too far gone, Eywa was cruel to have plugged your ears to the endearment youâd been dying to hear from him for so long, making the last things you were aware father said to you the fact that he didnât even want to hear you talking.Â
And you fulfilled his wish.Â
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â đŚđ˛ đĄđ¨đŽđŹđ đ¨đ đŹđđ¨đ§đ (đđđđ đđđ đđđđđ) â
âIt should not be a luxury, but a right to choose, to fight for the family that you want.â
âI fight... for the family that I have.â
pairing ;; neteyam (20) x reader (21)
synopsis ;; Your right to be a child ended at the ripe age of one with the butchering of your birth family in the Battle of the Hallelujah Mountains, but the newborn daughter of your adopted mother and father was your rebirth as a big sister â suddenly your life had purpose and direction, you were content endlessly doting on Loratirea despite being nothing but unwanted baggage who didnât quite belong, convinced that they were impatient for the day you would finally leave the nest.Â
And leave the nest you did, alright. Â
Originally from the Anurai clan, your family had to seek Uturu from the Omatikaya after relentless raids from the sky people resulted in the passing of your father.Â
He was the only link you had to this family as the one with blood connection to you, and youâre forever grateful to your (step)mother for treating you like another one of hers when youâre already well past the age to find a mate of your own, you wouldnât know what to do if you didnât have your sister and her. They werenât obligated to let a mere orphan in on their love at all in the first place, and you owe it to your remaining family to look after them until theyâre happily integrated and safe in Toruk Maktoâs fortress, and then youâll be able to go back to Bone Sanctuary, finally move on with your life after paying your debt.Â
You take the sign of atokirina flocking around your sister the night you arrive as the period at the end of your resolve. Loratirea is chosen by Eywa as a blessing to the Omaticaya, the Oloâeyktan and his family are beyond thrilled to have her become a part of the clan, the mating between her and the eldest son training to be the next Oloâeyktan is immediately the hot topic amongst people the morning after.Â
Youâll make sure your sweet sister is mated with the perfect man who can make her the happiest Naâvi in the world. Youâre not sure what Eywa is trying to say, but Loratirea will not be burdened by duty, you refuse to let her tread on the path youâre walking on, it may be selfish on your part, but she deserves nothing but the best.Â
The best happens to be Neteyam te Suli Tsyeykâitan, or so they say.Â
And he is at the bottom of your list. That impudent boy will keep away from your sister if he knows whatâs good for him, especially after all the atrocious qualifications heâs listed about what it had to take to be his mate with no room for love in there â the single thing your sister wants most in her life. The way he viewed love, the way he viewed tĂŹmuntxa as nothing but a responsibility to better protect his familyâŚ
No, heâs not worthy of her. Loratirea deserves more than to exist to serve Jakesuliâs immediate family. You will make Neteyam get it before your sister completes her rite of passage. He will back off and find another miserable, unfortunate soul for his cause.
And oh, how he hates you for getting in his way, choking him, surrounding him like ivy the more he tries to move â to free himself.
notes / explanations ;;
â ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE!
â avatar the way of water did not happen and the sully family remained in the forest. neteyam grew up to be extremely pressured and has nothing in his mind but fulfilling his duties, so his decisions revolve around that.
â enemies to lovers, there's plot if you squint and things get messy, heavily based on Bridgerton season 2, neteyam is basically anthony bridgerton and im here to spread the agenda, this is basically neteyam and you bonding over older sibling status and that you are way more similar than you both initially thought!
â PLEASE interact omg this is my first work on this blog dont let me flop đ
COMING SOON ..!
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