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nanami-says · 3 years
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Part V (2/3): chapters 58~60
Chapter 58
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[About Sukuna’s fingers resonating with one another]
"The ones that possess an immense presence. The ones that are hiding. The ones that are already taken in by cursed spirits."
⇒ "1) The ones with too big presences. 2) The ones holding their breath. 3) The ones already absorbed by cursed spirits."
I added the numbers for explanation purposes, see below. 
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"One of Sukuna's fingers was hidden by a cursed spirit. When Itadori consumed the finger in June, it released its cursed energy"
⇒ "The Sukuna fingers that had been absorbed were holding back their power [while] inside cursed spirits. Then they unleashed their cursed energy with Itadori's incarnation [of Sukuna] in June serving as a trigger."
Whelp. On top of extremely simplifying the explanation, they mixed up the kind of Sukuna finger involved here - it was very explicitly stated in the text that it was number 3) "absorbed" (assimilated) fingers, and not 2) "hiding" fingers. 
I guess saying that Itadori consumed the finger isn't wrong plot wise but it's actually referred to (here and many times more in the manga) as "incarnation"! The same word also gets used for the death painting brothers.
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[Megumi remembering a conversation with Gojou] 
"I was surprised you asked me to train you"
⇒ "It's rare for you to ask me for a practice, Megumi"
"To train you" wasn't wrong but Gojou saying "it's rare" here points to it either happening occasionally or having happened in the past and I'm not sure "I was surprised" quite conveys that. 
"Are you feeling pressure because of Yuji's growth?"
⇒ "Did you get impatient after getting surpassed by Yuuji?"
Gojou actually says that Yuuji has surpassed Megumi here! Quite a different nuance from just "Yuji's growth".
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"Megumi, your skill and potential are probably higher than Yuji's. All that’s left is the mental aspect"
⇒ “You know, Megumi, I think that both your real ability and potential are in no way inferior to Yuuji's. (...)"
Emphasis mine because pray tell, how does one reach the conclusion that "don't lose out to"/"aren't inferior to" equals to "are probably higher". “Skill” was fine btw but I’d probably go with “mindset” for the last line, personally.
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[Gojou explaining why he thinks Megumi doesn’t know how to make a serious effort giving the baseball game as an example]
“Why did you bunt? You sacrificed yourself so that Nobara could advance. Well, good for you"
⇒ "Why did you make a sacrifice bunt? Did you want to advance Nobara to the next base even if it meant you'd be out yourself? That's commendable"
The nuance for the last line was just different - the word used there usually is just used as praise, either genuine or ironic but imo “good for you” has a different meaning. Also he says “out”  but it’s written as “death” (although that is sometimes the case in baseball as well.)
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“But no matter how many allies you have around you, you'll always die alone"
⇒ “(...) when you die, you’re alone”
I tried to phrase it a bit closer to the original because I feel like the nuance may just be different for this line but can’t quite put a finger on the how.
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[Gojou to Megumi]
"To die and then win, and dying victoriously are two completely different things, Megumi"
⇒ "To win by dying and to win even if you die are completely different, Megumi"
Emphasis by Gege. Ngl, I had no clue what the English was trying to say here… This is most likely what the line actually meant.
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[Megumi regaining his consciousness after he blacked out from getting hit] 
 "How long was I out? Was my divine dog destroyed? No, my technique's finished"
Actually "my technique got undone". Putting it as "has finished" is imo both unclear and misleading. Similar situation as in ch. 1 (refer to part I).
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[Lead-up to Megumi using a domain expansion for the first time]
"A jujutsu sorcerer's growth never comes easy"
⇒ "The growth curve of a sorcerer isn’t always gentle"
Mostly, the line was more intricate in the original but also the grammatical construction used here that they mistranslated as "never" actually means "not always [necessarily]” instead.
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"Here we go!!"
Not really incorrect but it's kinda generic and I guess something like "I'm gonna do it!" is closer nuance wise. 
"With a firm base, skill and imagination, a person can change thanks to the slightest of events"
⇒ "A firm foundation, a handful of sense, and imagination. Then, [even] with a most insignificant opportunity, a person will change"
A pity they simplified "a handful of sense" into just "skill" here. Overall not really incorrect but I wanted to propose something that imo better conveys the original wording and vibe.
“Area expansion”
…”area”? What? Obviously this is actually “domain expansion”. I just don’t have words.
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“Think bigger! My technique’s interpretation!”
First sentence actually referred to the second one, so it’s actually something like “Expand it!! The technique’s interpretation!!”
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[Megumi to the cursed spirit after his shikigami deals it a finishing blow]
"Divine dog's claws even hurt it...You were no match!"
"(...) So something like piercing through you when you're not even paying attention was easy"
Less excitement, more dismissiveness, I’d say? Also, for the divine dog it’s actually specified that it’s “divine dog (totality)” and not just simply “divine dog”. The term appeared before in ch. 47.
Chapter 59
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[Megumi talking about what he considers the basic rule for human interactions in a flashback to his middle school years]
"Basically, you shouldn't cross any line that violates another person's dignity. You should acknowledge each other's mutual existence. That's the rule. You ignored it and fed your stupid ego"
⇒ "In short, it's drawing a line in order not to jeopardise one another's dignity; [it’s] a process through which both parties can coexist. That's what the "rule" is”. You broke it, throwing your weight around and forcing everyone to walk on eggshells around you”
For the first sentence, Megumi says “it’s drawing a line”, so the nuance here was probably closer to “creating boundaries” rather than “crossing boundaries” like in the official English release. For the second sentence, the original literally says “the process through which one another’s existence is achieved”, so rather than acknowledging each other’s existence the sentiment is probably closer to live and let live? For the last sentence, they once again simplified it to the barest bones.
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"I'll definitely tell Ikezawa and everyone today that we're not their lapdogs"
“You got this, Aida!”
"But we might be the next punching bags, so don't go overboard!"
Should be “Ikezawa and others'' and definitely “that I’m not their errand boy” for the smallest boy’s first line. If all of them were already being treated as errand boys like the way using the plural form here implies, the other student’s reply wouldn’t make sense.
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[After Tsumiki sees Megumi has beaten up delinquents once again]
“You said you wouldn’t pick fights anymore”
“You’re not my mom”
⇒ (...) “Don’t act like you’re my guardian”
Imo the distinction is significant because there’s a possibility that Tsumiki as the older of the two probably did feel responsible for Megumi to an extent and acted accordingly, as if she was his guardian. 
Also, he doesn’t actually say “mom” - this is not the first time where the official English release opts for a gendered phrase where the original uses a neutral form. (Like making Yuuji say his grandpa was like a dad to him when he actually said parent all the way back in ch. 2.) 
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[Megumi’s thoughts from back in the middle school]
"I hate bad guys with no brains and zero emotional capability. Walking around feeling proud. Disgusting."
⇒ "I hate bad people. The way they act like they’re superior, with their complete lack of imagination or sensitivity. Disgusting”
I guess I really dislike the way they worded it here, especially the “no brains” part since Megumi wasn’t really talking about intellect or smarts here but about imagination (and sensitivity), which he literally describes as being akin to "vacant lot", "empty lot", "raw land”, which is much more evocative.
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"I hate goody-goodies forgiving bad people, justifying mercy. Makes me wanna puke"
⇒ "I hate good people. The way they forgive such bad people and perceive that act of forgiveness as something noble. They make me sick"
Mhm, way to just simplify the heck out of the whole line. I’m extra bothered by their use of “goody-goodies” here since this is yet another appearance of a rather formal word for “good person” (善人/zennin) in the original and which I’ve observed to be a very important part of the world-building in jjk. I discuss it at length in various previous installments, with notable examples including: ch. 9 (Megumi about Yuuji and about the kind of people he wants to save - part I), ch. 31 (Nanami and Yuuji’s conversation in the aftermath of the Junpei incident - part III 2/2), ch. 36 (Panda about Yuuji - part IV 2/5).
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“Tsumiki, you’re a perfect example of a good person.”
See, the word he uses here to describe Tsumiki is the same as in the line above (善人) but because back then it got translated as “goody-goodies”, you’d never guess it since the vibes are just that different.
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[Megumi reminiscing about meeting Gojou for the first time]
"In the first grade, my dad and Tsumiki's mom got married and separated just as quickly"
⇒ "When I was in the first grade of elementary school my father and Tsumiki’s mother, our respective single parents, got together and disappeared into thin air"
The original doesn’t mention marriage OR separation. Heck, especially for the second one, it doesn’t even come close to mentioning it?? I have no clue where they got this from. 
What I put as “got together” can also be translated as “to have a liaison with (a man or a woman)” (among others). Since Tsumiki’s surname is also “Fushiguro” in middle school, it’s possible that they were actually married and many Japanese fans seem to think that as well but it’s not explicitly stated, at least not here, so those are most likely speculations. 
As for mysterious “separation”, the word used here actually means "disappearance (of people intentionally concealing their whereabouts); unexplained disappearance", so imo the whole section means their parents got together and at some point both disappeared. As we learn at one point in the manga Touji first and Tsumiki’s mum sometime later. 
(Btw, one fan scanlation used “evaporation” here instead and while this is another possible translation of the word in question, imo from the context it’s clear that the intended meaning was the “unexplained disappearance” instead.)
Lastly, Megumi uses kind of formal expressions when referring to both his own dad and Tsumiki’s mum, which imo is indicative of the emotional distance.
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[Tiny Megumi about teenager Gojou]
"A weirdo with white hair said"
⇒ "A suspicious man with white hair"
Needless to say, he doesn't actually call Gojou a weirdo.
[Gojou about Touji] 
"But he's a loser that just works for me. He left the family and had you."
⇒ "He's enough of a good-for-nothing to take aback even me. Basically, he left home and then had you."
Emphasis mine. Again, I literally have no clue where they got the translation they went with for this. “Works for me” - just what?? (Btw, one of the fan scans available for this had the latter part of this line mistakenly imply that Gojou had Megumi leave his house. The bit definitely referred to Touji leaving the Zen’in family.)
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"You're something your dad used against the Zen'in family. His trump card"
⇒ “You’re something your father kept as his strongest card against the Zen’in family”
A bit of a different nuance than “your dad used” suggests.
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"The divorce money makes sense now. I was sold to this Zen'in family"
⇒ "The mystery behind the funds for their disappearance got solved. Apparently, I was sold to this Zen’in family or something"
Again, the word for “divorce” doesn’t make an appearance ANYWHERE in this chapter, least of all this page. ...How. 
Once again - fan scans had this as money that also evaporated but neither it nor the official English release make sense, considering the line is followed up by “I was sold” as the explanation. So yeah, imo the first sentence definitely referred to the money Megumi considered necessary for Touji (and co’s) disappearance.
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[Gojou referring to Touji basically selling Megumi off]
"Sucks, doesn't it?"
"Yeah, it's annoying. Especially your attitude."
⇒ “It pisses you off, doesn’t it”
“Yeah, it does piss me off. Especially that lack of delicacy of yours”
I mentioned it multiple times but imo repetition in the original text tends to be done on purpose and as a device and imo this was another example where this was the case. Megumi borrows Gojou’s words here. (Which mean “to be irritated, “to be angry” and not “it sucks”.)
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[Megumi continuing about Gojou]
"But that annoying guy wrote off the situation with the Zen'in family. He made a promise that we would work as sorcerers in the future. We would be collateral and receive financial support from Jujutsu High in exchange."
⇒"This man pisses me off, but it was him who cancelled the deal with the Zen'in family, and made it so we would receive financial support from the technical college with me working as a sorcerer in the future [serving] as collateral for it”
I don’t know why they’d translate it as “we would work” here since who the “we” would be supposed to even entail other than Megumi himself? Surely not Tsumiki. Or Gojou. Also, putting the next bit as “we would be collateral” makes it sound kind of dehumanising to me, ngl, whereas Megumi was talking about his labour here.
Also, the same phrase for “pisses off” as above got used once again, which makes it three times in a row, so imo that was definitely a deliberate stylistic choice on Gege’s part.
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“Jujutsu sorcerers. How stupid.
⇒ "Sorcerers, what even. How nonsensical"
Just proposing an alternate wording.
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[Megumi about the curse Tsumiki got hit by]
"All we knew was that we didn't know anything. Tsumiki still sleeps."
The word used to describe Tsumiki’s state literally means “became bedridden”, which imo heavily implies she fell into a coma. “Still sleeps” is most likely a misunderstanding on the translator’s part since the word sounds like it’d mean that (but it doesn’t.)
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[Megumi about Tsumiki]
"Always smiling and saying nice things"
⇒ “Always smiling and spouting lip service”
Another case where the translator seems to have translated the word based on the way it’s written as opposed to checking the actual meaning. (The “nice things” phrase.)
"It's not a bad thing to not forgive people. Megumi, that's your way of showing kindness."
⇒ “Not being able to forgive people isn’t a bad thing. That’s your kindness, Megumi”
It wasn’t just “not to forgive” but “not being able to forgive”! Which imo would imply the next line’s nuance was something similar to Tsumiki considering Megumi’s inability to forgive people to be something that stems from his kindness (e.g. because he can’t stand seeing injustice).
"Even spinning my short-comings in a positive light."
⇒ “She would affirm even my nature"
Imo this line was more of Tsumiki accepting Megumi as he is or at least that’s what the line says - makes sense with what I proposed for the line above too. Translating it the way they did in the official release kind of feels like overinterpreting.
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"But even she would get upset when I hurt somebody. I was annoyed by the hypocrisy"
⇒ "But even such Tsumiki would get genuinely angry (...). I would get annoyed thinking she was a stickler to the rules and a hypocrite"
Emphasis mine. The phrase that the translators seem to have skipped here and I translated as "stickler to the rules" literally means "to play it safe", "to avoid trouble at all cost". 
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"Yeah, I know. I was immature. I'm sorry so please wake up already"
“I’m sorry, I was a brat. I’ll apologise so just wake up already, stupid older sister”
Just a different nuance and tone for the whole line.
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"All I did was get rid of the Yasohachi bridge curse. My sister's sleeping curse is a separate matter."
⇒ "This Yasohachi bridge curse was probably only overlapping with it, and the curse that caused Tsumiki to fall into a coma probably hasn't been lifted"
The official English release makes it sound like sleeping (or more correctly, the coma) was the nature of the curse that Tsumiki was put under, whereas imo the original indicates it just as its effect, which is an important distinction.
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“As for the finger and Itadori…”
⇒ “What should I tell Itadori about the finger...”
The “tell”, “say” is only implied here but it’s pretty clear from the context that was the meaning. Also, he explicitly says “to Itadori” here.
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[After the Yasohachi bridge curse got defeated by Megumi who then retrieved the Sukuna finger from it] 
"All of sudden I feel a presence. Did the finger get out of the barrier? Whoever took out the finger bearer is quite formidable."
⇒ “The huge presence that appeared all of sudden... Did Sukuna's finger get out of the barrier? If it was a sorcerer that exorcised the finger's host, they must be quite good......."
Emphasis mine on bits that got cut out in the official release. Because Esou was facing off Nobara, he probably assumed it’s likely there may be other sorcerers present and imo that’s what this line also suggests.
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"Even so... The finger... Even if they fought against a special-grade and won, They more than likely didn't come out of it unscathed. I hope they're okay."
Just to clarify that the word used for “they” in the original indicates the speaker knows the people in question, so those were Nobara’s thoughts here.
 Chapter 60
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[Esou to Yuuji and Nobara after he activates his wing king technique]
“Start running and turn your backs to me”
“Run. With your backs turned to me” would fit better nuance and mood wise. (Esou didn’t want to show his back to anyone so now he’s’ forcing them to show theirs.)
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[Nobara to Yuuji after he scooped her up because she couldn’t run as fast as he could]
“I got your back”
“Okay”
“Okay” isn’t incorrect per se but the word has the nuance of “I’m counting on you”.
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[Nobara to Yuuji after he speeded through the forest while carrying her, allowing them to escape from Esou's technique]
"Well done, you deserve some praise"
“Yeah, yeah”
“Just kidding. Thanks!”
⇒ "You have my praise." (...)
Actually a set phrase! Spoken from a rather elevated/superior POV, which is why Nobara later reiterates that she’s genuinely thankful. Also, I probably would just go with a period for “Thanks”, imo nuance wise it didn’t require an exclamation mark and it’s not there in the original either.
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[Esou after Yuuji gets splashed with Kechizu’s blood]
"There's no need to worry. My younger brother's blood isn't the same quality as mine"
Actually "doesn't have the same properties like mine”.
"You wouldn't even die from mine unless you were drowned in it."
Much closer to something like "unless you were to bathe your whole body in it".
"But it does hurt like hell"
⇒ "But it does hurt to death"
Not really wrong meaning wise but in the original it was “to death” instead of “like hell”, which combined with a previous line was probably a wordplay. "You won't die but it does hurt to death"
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[Esou explaining how his and Kechizu’s shared technique works]
"If you take in one of our brother's blood and if one brother activates a technique"
Idk if it's clear here but it most likely doesn't matter which brother does which (could even be the same one). Also, definitely should’ve been “the” or “this” for technique, since Esou has just stated on the same page he’s now going to start laying out how a specific technique of he and his brother’s functions.  
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[Esou replying to Yuuji]
"Yes, the result is essentially poison. Our technique is 'decomposition'"
Should be “but what our technique is, is actually ‘decomposition’” nuance wise.
"It's activated now. In reality they'll be dead faster than that”
⇒ “Done with technique disclosure, so in reality (...)”
Emphasis mine. You know, the rule in jujutsu where if you explain your technique to your opponent, it gets a buff? “Activation” is just wrong here. 
While it’s not phrased as such, the phenomenon is first explained in ch. 20 during Nanami’s explanation to Yuuji (refer to part II 2/2). It also gets mentioned by name later in the manga but oftentimes the official release would either skip it or word it completely differently so it’s hard to tell, like in ch. 51, when Hanami realises Toudou has lied to him (part IV 5/5). 
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[The history of how cursed wombs came to be]
"[In the beginning of the Meiji era] there was a girl with special genetic makeup who bore a cursed-spirit child"
Actually “with an idiosyncrasy that allowed her to get pregnant with the child of a cursed spirit”! Imo an important distinction since it’s not certain whether her first child that gets discussed here was born prematurely or not and the following pregnancies were all aborted.
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"A child born of mixed blood - both cursed spirit and human.”
Skipped “grotesque child” at the end.
“It was a mysterious pregnancy. She would be ostracized by family and friends.”
⇒ "Starting from a pregnancy she had no recollection of, [followed by] the oppression from her kith and kin, it made her go insane"
This latter part of this section is filled to the brim with complicated language so I’m not entirely sure but I think this might’ve been the intended meaning of the line. The official translators were probably struggling with the vocabulary too, so they cut out some stuff entirely, to be precise - the go insane part. It’s the bit I’m not certain about myself but I scoured Japanese dictionaries and that’s the meaning that seemed to be the best fit among the options.  
Anyway, to reiterate - the bit about the pregnancy actually says that the girl herself didn’t even know (couldn’t remember) how it came to be. The part about the relatives doesn’t mention friends, it’s actually a set phrase that means “one's relatives by blood and marriage (in blood and law); one's kith and kin” - I went here with the latter since it’s shorter and fits the overall vibe of the line.
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“She would hold the corpse of the child and flee to a temple in the mountains. The temple was run by jujutsu sorcerers. However, her luck had run out."
⇒ “(...) However, this was when her luck run out”
Other than the nuance in the last line, this isn’t mistranslated but the whole section just flowed differently in the original and felt less disjointed.
Also! One of the scanlations I’ve seen had it misspelled as “Noshitori” but the evil sorcerer’s name is actually “Kamo Noritoshi” (and yes, it’s the same as the young Kamo but the “toshi” is written with different characters).
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"The child born from a cursed spirit and human would become a prisoner of intellectual curiosity"
⇒ "His [Kamo Noritoshi's] intellectual curiosity would be taken captive by children born between a cursed spirit and a human"
Very much the other way around. It's very clear in the original that the subject of the sentence was Kamo's intellectual curiosity and not the child.
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"Death painting wombs: numbers 1-3. Cursed objects worthy of special grade."
Closer to "cursed objects powerful enough to be classified as special grade"
"Did cursed energy originate from a mother's hatred? No..."
It's specified here as "did their cursed energy" instead (emphasis mine), and the question is actually left unanswered......................................................... So yeah, congrats on getting rid of this very intended ambiguity. It's something like "or was it maybe--"
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[About cursed wombs]
"For 150 years, with only the notion of one another's existence, they would survive, sealed away"
⇒ "For 150 years, they endured the seal, relying only on one another's existence"
"The notion" just doesn't capture the sentiment of the line at all, which imo is most likely the follow-up to the narrator's musings about the origin of the death painting's immense cursed energy. (See above.)
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"We're siding with that cursed spirit."
Actually "siding with them", read as "them" but written as "the cursed spirits" - probably plural as the original literally says "the side of the cursed spirits", so it possibly means cursed spirits as a whole as well, aside of Mahito and co specifically. Remember, the brothers are actually half-humans too. I explain in depth the “written as but read as” device in part IV 4/5 (ch. 48, Toudou’s “my friend” phenomenon).
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"The future that the cursed spirits have painted is more suited for us. But that's it. Forget about what we owe for our freedom"
Not incorrect per se but Chousou actually says “forget the debt we owe them of our incarnation”, which would make it yet another instance where the official English release has cut out the term entirely. (Emphasis mine.)
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[Nobara after stating that a technique that assures a win as long as it hits an opponent is indeed powerful]
"I'm a bad match for you!!"
Actually “the worst match [possible]” - more confidence in the line! 
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[Nobara to the death painting brothers after using Resonance on herself thus redirecting their attack back at them]
"Let's play a game of chicken, shall we?"
The actual wording is “contest of endurance”, I’m not entirely sure if the two have the same connotation.
[part v (3/3)]
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nanami-says · 3 years
Text
Part III (1/2): chapters 19-25
Vs. Mahito Arc
Chapter 19 (aka why this blog exists)
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J:”Yeah, we know that. But we flatter her because she looks easy.”
⇒ ”And the three of them know it as well. But they flatter you exaggeratedly anyway because they think you’ll let them do you”
Actually Junpei’s lines.
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J:”I can’t believe people like that go to my school.”
Not incorrect, I just want to point out that Junpei didn’t just say “people”, the word he used is “race” (人種), which implies he doesn’t see them as the same kind of human he is.
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J:”Was it that guy who did it? There’s no way a person could do that! If he did it, he must not be human.”
⇒ “Was it that person just now? No, would such a thing be even possible for a human being? And if it was, would they really be a ‘human being’?”
Overall correct but the flow was different. Mind you, 人 can be translated both as “person” and “human being” (among others) depending on the context. Imo this captures the nuance better but YMMV!
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N:”I’m here to identify the truth and uphold the law. There was a time when I thought the society had the same goals”
⇒ ”Adapting to the facts [in front of you] and managing yourself accordingly. That’s who I am. There was a time where I mistakenly believed society operated on the same basis.”
This was really hard to translate, especially since the phrase Nanami uses here is rather formal language. I actually checked the official anime subtitles for this one and they went with “I adhere to the facts and judge on that basis”, which I guess is close enough? I’d probably go with it as well if not for the fact that he doesn’t just say 律する but 己を律する (己/onore = I/me in humble language).
Seems like the exact meaning of the phrase is difficult to understand even for Japanese people - there are whole articles out there breaking down the meaning and giving examples of how to implement it in life 8D Anyway, the simplest explanation is “to control yourself”, with further nuance of “enforcing rules on yourself in order to achieve a goal”, “restricting your desires and impulses by your own will” etc.
Thanks a lot, Gege.
Btw, Ino, who respects Nanami greatly and considers him a mentor, actually uses the same phrase, word for word, in ch. 95! (事実に即し、己を律する) That’s how important it is. Also, continuity!
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Y:”Let’s do it!”
N:”There’s no need to get excited”
⇒ Y:“Let’s go all out!!”
 N:”No, if moderate’s enough, let’s just do it moderately”
They both used descriptors for just what kind of intensity they should approach the mission with. Imo, an important distinction because after they learn the full extent of the situation, Nanami takes back his words from this moment and agrees with Yuuji, going as far as to use the same words Yuuji did here.
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N:”I wonder what others would think hearing you say that”
⇒ “I’m sure the others wouldn’t want to hear that from you [of all people]”
So not so much “don’t be rude” as “dude, you’re the weirdest of them all”. Emphasis mine.
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N:”What I learned at Jujutsu High is that jujutsu sorcerers are idiots” 
& “What I realized while at the office is that work is idiotic”
He actually says “shit” both times lol. If it was just the humour that suffered here, it still wouldn’t be too awful but unfortunately it’s not just that. The “sorcerers are shit” line gets recalled when Nanami’s facing death, trapped in Mahito’s domain, which makes it pretty damn important. It gets translated yet differently by the official release then, too, which further damages continuity I believe Gege intended for this.
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”So I took the lesser of two evils. Nothing more, nothing less”
⇒ “If both are shit, then I just chose the one I’m more cut out for. That’s all as far as the reason for my coming back is concerned.”
I mean, if we realllllly insist on watering down everything that Nanami says (as JJK translators apparently did), then the basic meaning was conveyed but the original wording and nuance was closer to what I proposed.
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N:”Prove to me that you can be useful in spite of the demon Sukuna inside of you”
⇒ “Give your best to prove that you’re useful despite carrying the bomb that Sukuna is.”
Considering how 2 pages later Nanami tells Yuuji that he’s not the one Yuuji should be proving himself to, it’d have been weird if this is actually what he’d said, wouldn’t it. But Nanami’s nothing if not reasonable, so that wasn’t the case.
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Y:”I’m weak and useless. I’ve been hearing a lot of that these days”
⇒ “That I’m weak and useless... I’ve been realising that to a painful extent these days”
“I’ve been hearing it” would imply that someone was actually saying it either to Yuuji himself or to others which he was aware of. (I mean, other than Sukuna.) The original wording doesn’t really hold such connotation.
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N:”If you think you’re in trouble, let me know”
Y:”Have some faith in me, will ya? Just a little.”
N:”It’s not about faith.(...)”
Y:”A child? I’d rather be underestimated”.
⇒ N:“If you decide you cannot win, please call me.”
Y:”Aren’t you underestimating me too much?”
N:”This is not about ‘underestimating’ or ‘not underestimating’.(...)
Y:”[Even] being underestimated would’ve been better over being treated like a kid.”
I guess the translators wanted to avoid saying “underestimate” 3 times in a row? Albeit that’s what the original does.
More importantly though!!
N:”I’m an adult and you’re a child. I have the obligation to look after you”
⇒ “(...) It’s my obligation to prioritise you over myself.”
Quite a different nuance, right. Not just “I have to look after you” but “your well-being [life] takes priority over my own”.
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N:”Experiencing these little losses is what helps people grow into adults”
⇒ “It’s the accumulation of such small despairs that turns people into adults”
Not that wildly different but despairs (hopelessnesses) >>> losses, y/y. Also “helps” made it sound more positive when it’s both a poignant and at the same time dry statement.
Chapter 20
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N:”There are techniques that aren’t affected if revealed to certain enemies”
Those two feel more like separate examples to me. I.e. that there are techniques that aren’t affected if revealed, and there are some enemies that you can afford to reveal your technique to. Could apply simultaneously but don’t necessarily have to, if that makes sense?
“There is a merit to revealing one’s hand and the rules it initiates. You can make your technique even more effective.”
⇒ “It has its merits too. The ‘binding’ of ‘revealing one’s hand’ amplifies the effectiveness of your technique.”
Wild lost “binding” appears! Like I indicated before, it’s the lack of consistency to translating terms that are consistent in the original, that has negatively affected the fans’ ability to understand the basics of jjk techniques and world-building.
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[Explaining Yuuji’s divergent fist]
GJ:”But it’s a lot easier said than done for anyone else.”
⇒ “It’s not something that can be easily done on purpose”
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N:”His physical strength is superhuman. The impact of his hit doesn’t have incredibly strong energy, but it’s still about 20% more than a normal sorcerer. That means his delayed hit comes from his main source of cursed energy. It must be quite annoying for those on the receiving end. Such potential. If he’s able to go out all and combine his full physical strength with a cursed technique…”
⇒ “(...) The initial impact contains little cursed energy but it still achieves 120% of an average sorcerer. And then the actual cursed energy hits with a delay. For those on the receiving end it must be more unpleasant than one could imagine. And he’s got potential for growth, too. If he becomes able to add 100% of cursed energy to a 100% body…”
Uhh, this was a tricky one because on the first read it doesn’t seem that terribly wrong but when you read the original carefully, you realise this and that got lost in translation. My version should be closer to the original meaning.
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I:”We’re going to have to ask the murderer about the technique”
⇒ “That’s just something that you can’t know unless you ask the offender about their technique”
Obviously Ieiri wasn’t suggesting to literally ask the murderer.
“However there’s evidence the brain stems were modified. Their consciousness were also modified to create a state of confusion”
⇒ (...) This was probably done to create a disturbance of consciousness... a state of mental confusion”
Slightly different nuance for this one.
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Y:”For me, the gravity of death is the same regardless. This isn’t right!”
First sentence is mostly correct but it should’ve been “the gravity of death of another person” (emphasis mine).
Second sentence sounds too mild for what is actually Yuuji being super mad specifically about the way those people were killed? The phrase he uses means something like "This is just in way too poor taste”, “way too vulgar” etc. I guess if you went for a less literal translation, you could say “just too disgusting”/”revolting”.
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N:”This matter won’t be taken care of so easily. Let’s do it”
⇒ “Looks like ‘moderately’ won’t be enough here. Let’s go all out.”
This is the instance of Nanami retracting his words and backing Yuuji up by borrowing his own words that I mentioned earlier!
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M:”Jujutsu sorcerers brand such entities as “special grade potential spirits” and fear them as much as powerful curses. The fact that they categorize them as such really shows their shallowness”
⇒ “Jujutsu sorcerers register them as “special grade potential apparitions” and remain on alert against them [on alert for their appearance]. The same applies to powerful unidentified curses. That they categorise them as ‘potential apparitions’ just shows how little they truly see.”
It’s not that sorcerers fear them per se but that they (most likely) monitor them and are on guard against them. When followed up by the “what people truly genuinely fear are natural disasters [forces of nature]” conversation, it becomes clear that what Mahito scorns sorcerers for is their short-sightedness for thinking all powerful curses must be born out of people’s imagination, ~urban legends~ etc.
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[Junpei asking what Mahito was born from]
M:”Thanks to the hatred spewed between people I was born”
⇒ “I’m a curse born out of the fear and hatred people harbour towards [other] people"
or even
“I’m a curse born out of people hating and fearing people”
Again a quite different nuance. They really shouldn’t have edited “fear” out.
Chapter 21
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J:’Don’t you think that whoever first said, ‘The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference’ must be rotting in hell? There’s no way hating people is better than feeling indifferent towards them.”
⇒ “(...) There’s no way that approaching others with evil intentions is better than not interacting [with them] at all”
The first sentence is mostly fine although the original doesn’t include the “is not hate” bit, it only says “the opposite of love is indifference”. The second part is quite different. After all, hating doesn’t necessarily imply there’s any action taken.
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“Complicating simple things for the sake of meaning is such a Japanese thing to do”
⇒ “Japanese sure love it - complicating simple answers and gloating in it”
I didn’t like the “for the sake of meaning” bit, imo it’s over-interpreting.
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J:”Indifference. That’s what humans should strive for.”
M:”Sounds more like revenge”
J:“Are you saying that I got it all mixed up?”
Junpei’s first line here is fine although interestingly enough he puts it as “a virtue humans should strive for”. Then it’s
⇒ M:“And yet you wish for revenge”
J:”Are you trying to say I’m contradicting myself?”
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M:”In this world, only I understand the soul’s composition. I can even transmogrify living beings. Emotions come from the soul. It’s too simplistic to call it ‘heart’. People overthink the things they can’t see. (...)”
⇒ “In this world I’m the only one who understands the soul’s composition. After all, I change the shape of living beings by touching it. Emotions are products of the metabolism of the soul. It’s altogether too mechanical [of a process] to call it a heart. People assign too much value to things invisible to the eye.(...)”
Last one is literally “consider ‘special’ way too much”, simpler wording than what I went with but I tried to make it more legible.
The “metabolism of the soul” phrase is especially vital because Junpei throws it at Yuuji almost word for word when confronted by him at the school after his mother’s death.
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More philosophy lessons from Mahito-sensei \o/
“Don’t limit yourself to just being indifferent. There’s no reason to live by such a restricting philosophy.”
⇒ “Don’t allow yourself to be shackled by the ideal called ‘indifference’. There’s no need for there to be consistency in one’s way of life.”
Mahito actually takes the “is ‘consistency’ necessary” stance a few times in the manga, including when he and Getou squabble about the relationship between the body and the soul in Shibuya. A pity about the mistranslation here.
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“I support everything you represent, Junpei”
⇒ “I’ll affirm your everything, Junpei”
Imo the act of supporting and the act of affirming while similar aren’t one and the same, hence the change.
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N:”Either come alone, or risk bringing Itadori with me. I chose the former, nothing more. He’s still a child, after all.”
⇒ “The risk of venturing [into the enemy’s territory] alone, or the risk of bringing Itadori-kun with me. I simply chose the former. He’s still a child, after all.”
Idk, I feel like cutting out “the risk” from the first option makes Nanami sound more callous? Like Yuuji’s a liability and going by himself is a sounder option. Whereas, it was actually him weighing two risks against each other and deciding that potentially endangering Yuuji is the one he can afford less.
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[After Yuuji asks why he doesn’t know important jujutsu related stuff.]
I:”Because Gojou’s your mentor.” ⇒ “it’s because Gojou’s ...”
He actually uses a lovely adjective to describe Gojou, which can mean a plethora of things, including: irresponsible, sloppy, lazy, unreliable, careless, perfunctory etc. etc.
Ichiji? Not a member of Gojou Satoru Fanclub.
Y:”This feels like a bad plan”
⇒ “This feels so staged, I don’t like it.”
Lit. “play [perform, read] one's own work”. I think what Yuuji might’ve meant here was that the plan felt dishonest? Second sentence could also be “I don’t feel up for it.”
Chapter 22
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M:”Was that some kind of cursed technique?”
N:”What do you mean by ‘some kind’? I don’t appreciate questions that are left open to interpretation”
⇒ “(...) I hate abstract questions that put the whole burden on the other person”
Lit. “that leave it to others”. Other than Nanami being more straightforward with “hate”/”dislike”, I think this was him expressing he doesn’t like people who don’t even try to think for themselves and immediately demand answers from others instead.
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“It would be silly to not assume a connection(...)”
⇒ “It would be more unnatural not to assume a connection(...)”
Different wording (unnatural instead of silly), which imo affects Nanami’s characterisation.
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M:”The shape of the body will always be dependent on the shape of the soul”
This sounds a bit too passive and generic? Closer to “The shape of the body gets pulled along by the shape of the soul”, which is literally what Mahito’s technique does.
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I’m heavily paraphrasing but!
magazine raw scans: ”it's 6:30 PM now and I started working at 11 AM, so I'm going to finish by 7PM no matter what”
official English release:”it's 5:30 PM now and I started at 10, gotta finish by 6”
The time change is so random, I wonder if Gege simply changed it themselves for the volume release. Maybe to bring it closer to the common office job times? Typical Japanese work day at the office begins at 9AM and lasts 8h + 1h break (completely unpaid but compulsory). I guess if Nanami skipped the break then working 10AM-6PM would make it exactly 8h?
The biggest mystery of jjk.
Chapter 23
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M:”Even if sorcerers can protect their bodies using cursed energy, they can’t protect their souls”
⇒ “Even if sorcerers can protect their bodies using cursed energy, they [just] aren’t used to protecting their souls”.
So it’s not that they “can’t” as in “are incapable of” and more that there’s never been the need, so they never learned how and aren’t used to doing it. As proven by Yuuji later it’s not impossible.
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M:”Overtime? He restricts himself based on time! He was limiting his power until now!”
⇒ “Overtime work? A ‘biding’ based on time! He was suppressing his power by himself until now!”
Another instance where “binding” as a term makes its appearance (it even uses quotation marks) but wasn’t properly denoted by the translators.
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M:”A large-scale attack, and he doesn’t care if he gets hit while doing it!”
⇒ “A large-scale attack [done] with the resolve of [potentially] getting killed along with me!”.
The phrase Mahito uses here is 相打ち, lit. “killing [hitting] each other at the same time”. Also, “doesn’t care” and “is prepared/has the resolve” are quite different, aren’t they.
Chapter 24
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J:”The way a perfectionist is willing to lay everything out there is beautifully portrayed”
⇒ ”The change in emotions [leading up] to a perfectionist abandoning everything is properly portrayed here”
I’m including this because knowing Gege, it’s not just simple movie talk, and it’s actually foreshadowing Yuuji’s future fate or something 8D
I can’t decide if it’s “abandon” (also “throw out of the window”) or “sacrifice” because the word used can mean either. I’m leaving that to everyone’s interpretation.
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“Like I thought, that sorcerer’s nuts!”
⇒ “He doesn’t look it but he sure does reckless things, that sorcerer”
How does "he doesn't look it but (...)" even become "like I thought (...)"? He was laughing at and enjoying the contrast between Nanami's appearance/attitude and his actions/fighting.
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M:”My cursed energy is also controlled by my will”
⇒ “The spending of cursed energy too is among things I can supply by myself.”
I’m not entirely sure because it’s a tricky one, so take this one with a grain of salt. But the official release is definitely missing “spending/expenditure” and Mahito isn’t talking about using/manipulating his cursed energy in general but “the amount of cursed energy spent”.
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“Mr. Irresponsible Gojou” ⇒  “Devil-may-care Gojou-san”
“Mr. Mature Nanami” ⇒ “The adult of [all] adults Nanami-san”/”the adult above all adults”
I just really enjoy Ichiji and his little epithets, I guess.
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J:”Have you ever killed anyone?”
⇒ “Have you ever killed a human being/another human?”
Just putting it out there because imo there's a distinction between “anyone” and “a human being”. Especially considering how much of this arc was questioning what being a human means.
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Y:”Um… I mean, the choice to kill will definitely find its way to me”
⇒ "How to put it... once I've killed someone, "killing" would become one of the possible options [to take] in my life".
Maybe the nuance was there in the official release too and I just didn't pick up on it but to me the former makes it sound more like he’s saying "I may still have to kill one day". Whereas the original seems to hold the connotation that if you do something once - even if it’s something as horrible as killing another human being - it becomes easier to do it again in the future because it's a choice you've made before, it's not untouchable anymore.
Chapter 25
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[Yuuji expressing his regret over Nanami choosing to go fight Mahito alone.]
"Am I in your way, Nanamin?”
⇒ “Am I a burden [to you], Nanamin?”
A different nuance for this line.
“’My friend died but I wasn’t there because I’m a child.’ I wouldn't do that to you. That said"
⇒ "’My comrade died. But I wasn’t there. Why? Because I am a child.’ I would hate something like that" [to be put in such a position]
And this is just pure mistranslation. The whole “my comrade died but I wasn’t there because I’m a child” line is actually Yuuji painting a possible scenario (he does it with short sentences but the speech is overall polite). What they translated as “that said” was actually a follow-up to that scenario and could be translated as “something like that”.
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N:”Being a child is not a bad thing”
⇒ “Being a child is in no way a crime”
I wanted to point this out since the original word’s most common meaning is actually “sin”, which is significantly heavier than just “not a bad thing”. Could also go with a milder “is not something to feel guilty about” here I guess.
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G:”How’s the curtain coming along?”
M:”Can’t get in, can get out. This only applies to humans with weak cursed energy.”
⇒ G:”What’s the effect of the ‘curtain’?”
M:“Can't get out from the inside, can get in from the outside. (...)”
Literally the opposite for the curtain’s effect. Emphasis is Gege’s, too! Also Getou’s question was actually about how exactly the curtain in question would work, and not just how it was coming along.
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M:”We’ll make them fight and force Yuji Itadori to make a binding vow in Sukuna’s favor”
Just to reiterate, whenever “binding vow” appears, it’s actually just “binding”.
[to part iii (2/2)]
[to part iii (2/2)]
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nanami-says · 3 years
Text
Part IV (3/5): Chapters 40~44
 Chapter 40
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[Mai to Miwa]
“Maki? She’s worthless”
She actually calls her “just a small fry” here. Which imo is more dismissive than just outright derogatory like in the official release.
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“An iai technique huh? That’s strange. I have the advantage in terms of reach. She’s probably looking to disarm my cursed tool and create an opening.”
⇒”An iai [technique], huh? On top of that there seems to be some trick to it. With our difference in reach… rather than myself, she’s probably looking(...)”
Not mistranslated per se other than the “there seems to be a trick to it” line, which imo shouldn’t have been simplified to just “that’s strange”. But the original showed Maki’s thought process better.
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“She broke it with her leg? Why is she negating her reach advantage.”
⇒ ”She broke it?? With her thigh?? You’re getting rid of your reach advantage here??”
Again, the meaning was all there but some of the characterisation was lost. Miwa sounded so frantic and full of disbelief here, haha.
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[After Mei states that Maki should get promoted at least 2 ranks ASAP]
“I agree but her family seems to be getting in the way”
⇒ “I think so too, but you know, the Zen’ins keep getting in the way. It stinks, right”
More casual speech overall in the original, also Gojou’s more colourful language got a cut again.
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MM:“Heh… I don’t understand connections not based on money” 
G:“And you’ll always be a cheapskate.”
I get why they went with “cheapskate” here, as the word Gojou originally uses would be accurately translated as “miser”, which’s the kind of word most people would have to check in the dictionary. (I know I had to.) Nevertheless it’s interesting to me how Gojou basically alternates between super casual speech and much less common terms like this one. He seems to like wordplays in general?
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“Anyway, I can’t help but notice the video feed around Yuji seems to be a little inconsistent”
⇒ “Leaving that aside, the video around Yuuji keeps on cutting off for a while now, no?”
Again, meaning is there, the characterisation - sort of I suppose? But he was being more casual/straight to the point in the original.
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[In reply to Gojou’s question whose side she’s on]
“Whose side? I’m on the side with money, of course. There’s no value in something that can’t be bought since you can’t exchange it for money.”
“Which side? I’m an ally of money, of course. Because there’s no value in things that cannot be exchanged for money. For you see, it cannot be exchanged for money."
I know it sounds like she’s repeating herself but that’s because she actually is. She’s literally saying that there’s no value in something that can’t be turned into money PRECISELY BECAUSE it can’t be turned into money lol. Also, imo “on the side with money” kind of muddled the nuance a bit. Other possible translations for "exchange" include "replace", ”turn into”.
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Gojou in reply to above.
“I wonder how much!”
Actually closer to, “[I wonder] how much did you pile up”. The actual phrase is just “just how much did (...) pile up/stock”, so you have to supply the subject by yourself.
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“I’m not sure what you guys have planned but Yuji’s different now”
⇒ “I don’t know what you’re scheming but Yuuji won’t be killed so easily anymore”
Again, the basic meaning is there but a lot of subtler nuance got lost.
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(jp)
[Explanation on how the school can tell which side exorcised which curses during the competition]
“Talismans are placed on curses released in the area. When a curse is exorcised, the corresponding talisman also disappears. Using cursed energy, we’ve made arrangements for the following -- exorcisms made by the Tokyo school will be indicated with a red flame, while Kyoto’s will be blue. Maki is also participating, so we’ve made sure her exorcisms are marked red as well.”
When I read this for the first time in English, I found this explanation rather unclear. No wonder I did, as it omits vital details such as the original mentioning "recording cursed energy in advance" which imo seems to be pointing to them registering samples of all students' energy.
And then the Maki line adds that since Maki is there too, exorcisms performed by UNRECORDED forces will be marked red as well. And that's why later on the teachers weren't able to immediately discern whether the sudden destruction of curses was done by an outsider or not.
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“All those one-on-ones. Did they forget the main objective?”
⇒“(...) Everyone’s waaay too disinterested in the game.”
“Main objective” sounds kinda formal and imo that wasn’t the nuance for the line.
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[Nobara to Nishimiya]
“Got down here, you stupid witch!!”
Actually “you shitty witch”. Nanami would be proud ;;
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“How dare you hit my sacred face.”
I like their take on this but it’s hilarious in the original because the word she uses literally means “your countenance”, as in you’d normally use it to respectfully refer to someone else’s face, definitely not about your own. And then she adds a “go-” prefix, which further ups the level of reverence haha. 
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“A scar on the face can be a good thing for guys. But not for girls.”
Not really a mistranslation, but I love the original wording with its juxtaposition of a scar on the face being likened to an "order" for a man and a "blemish"/"defect" for a woman. It adds so much more depth to the line.
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[Nishimiya after she points out how unfair the jujutsu world is towards women compared to men]
“And Mai has to deal with even more discrimination than that”
Actually something closer to ”irrationality”, “unreasonableness”, “unfairness”, “derision”. Discrimination was the translators’ interpretation of that, I suppose.
Chapter 41
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[About Inumaki’s technique]
“Cursed speech is words with spirit. Essentially, it’s infusing sound with cursed energy”
...They translated it the other way around (“the spirit of words”) in ch. 33… Needless to say, this is still the same technique and still the very same term being used. I’d be leaning towards the more commonly used translation of “the spirit of language”.
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“However if you’re not sure it’s coming… you’ll be in a constant state of unease. Protecting your head is difficult as it is”
⇒ “On the other hand, if you don’t know if it’s coming or not, you’re constantly distracted. Even though protecting the inside of my head is already something I’m not used to doing”
Not really mistranslated but I wanted to propose an alternate translation, especially for the second part.
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“Inheriting the Zen’in family cursed technique is reserved for the privileged. Every other jujutsu sorcerer starts at a level much further below. And even within their family, some women aren’t treated equally.”
⇒ “Unless you inherit the Zen'in family's cursed technique, you start out as a sorcerer from a losing position. And for women, some of them are not even allowed to stand on that starting line"
Just an overall different meaning for the whole fragment. After all, it’s not like you can control who will inherit what technique, even if you’re from one of the three big families. Also it was about women being discriminated on a more fundamental level.
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“Can someone who thinks that curse Yuji is an ally really understand?”
⇒ “How about you try thinking hard with that head of yours that can even mistake [that] curse for a comrade?”
Written with “Itadori-kun”, read as “[the] curse” - there’s no reason for Nishimiya to call him “Yuji”. Also she actually says 仲間/nakama here, which, as I stated before, I personally prefer to translate as “comrade” in the context of jjk. The official release seems to alternate between “ally” and “friend”, which are rather distant terms imo. I’m not sure either what’s their basis for when they go with “ally” because they also used it when Gojou was talking about raising a future generation of strong and bright comrades in ch. 11 (refer to part II).
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[Nobara in response to above]
“Does that mean we have to forgive the unfortunate no matter the circumstances? And if someone is blessed with a fortunate life, do they deserve to be ridiculed?”
⇒ ”So if someone’s unfortunate, they’re free to do whatever they want? Then what? If in turn a person is [more] fortunate, you’re not gonna be satisfied unless you can talk behind their back?”
In the original Nobara speaks in shorter sentences and uses rather simple language, which imo really conveys how angry she is about Nishimiya’s words. It wasn’t really a philosophical conversation. 
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“Have any of you ever stopped to consider the person behind the curse you’ve condemned?”
⇒ “And have you people even thought what kind of a person the idiot that you’re trying to curse [from now] is?”
Not “condemn as a curse” but “that you people are cursing”! Huge distinction imo.
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“What do I care about whether someone’s perfect or if something’s fair? Is your life just a job?”
⇒ “Are you obliged to stand up to [things like] ‘perfection’ or ‘unfairness’? (...)”
Lit. “where’s the obligation to live up to”. Emphasis mine! Nobara wasn’t saying she doesn’t care whether someone is perfect or not, imo the nuance was more that there’s no need to force yourself to try and meet people’s expectations/standards. 
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“Boys versus girls? Give me a break! Just shut the hell up! I love dressing up and being beautiful! I love being strong!”
⇒ “Boys this, girls that? I don’t give a damn! Just do it all by yourselves if you wish! I love myself who dresses up beautifully! I love myself who [always] strives to be strong!”
I know fandom loves the “I love being beautiful! I love being strong” line - it definitely is short and impactful! But I actually really like the nuance that “strive to be/remain strong” has because it implies Nobara’s constantly putting in effort to improve herself and get stronger. Also the nuance of “I love myself who’s all those things [and more]” (emphasis mine) rather than simply “I love being those things”/“I love the act of”, even though to an English speaker the former may sound a bit awkward. 
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[Mai saying she can’t contact Mechamaru after his fight]
“It’s not a good sign if he was forced to use his finishing move and this is the end result.”
⇒ “If it’s like that [that we can’t contact him] despite him being forced into a corner to the point of having to use his finishing move, then he’s probably lost”
This was Mai speculating Mechamaru has most likely lost if they can’t contact him despite him having used his special move.
“I need you”
⇒ “If you’re not here, we’re in trouble”
Rather than Mai needing her personally, this was her reiterating Nishimiya’s importance to the team. (Same phrasing as in ch. 35.)
Chapter 42
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[About Maki and her family]
Y:“But why wouldn’t they want someone so strong?”
N:“They don’t wanna accept someone they’ve already rejected. They’re stupid that way”
⇒Y: “Wouldn’t a jujutsu family welcome a strong sorcerer with open arms?”
N:“(...) Because they’re stupid/idiots.”
Slightly more informative for Yuuji’s line in the original imo. Let’s not forget that Yuuji’s still super new to the jujutsu world, so he’s not really familiar with its inner workings. Imo this line had such a nuance.
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“So we have to win this event. You better put your life on the line!”
Not incorrect as much as it's just so much funnier in the original because she tells him to put enough effort to die one more time lol (emphasis mine).
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[Maki to Tokyo team, telling them to focus on the competition rather trying to make her look good]
“Don't’ worry about me”
⇒ “Don’t think about unnecessary stuff”
Imo this showed Maki’s personality better.
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[Mai to Maki, in her head]
“You thought you could get the jump on me? While keeping your distance as well?”
⇒ “So what if you’re in my blind spot. Aren’t you dumb to put distance between us”
This was more about it being advantageous for Mai, a gun being her weapon, if Maki gets farther away from her.
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“I knew it! Maki has something I don’t”
⇒ “I knew it… Maki has a talent I don’t have”
How a single exclamation mark can completely change the meaning of a whole line. Yes, it is “I knew it” but as in “I understood it”, “I felt it”. It’s not some revelation about the fight itself, it’s the beginning to Mai’s retrospection about herself and Maki and their approaches to life that follows after. Also, it literally says “talent” there, not to mention the line gets repeated word for word at the end of the same chapter for emphasis before the conclusion is given to Mai’s musings. (Gege seems to like this particular trick a lot, huh?)
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”Did you hear about the daughter of the Ougi?"
Hmm, I tried googling the phrase with “Ougi” in it just to check if it can have some hidden meaning but found out even Japanese fans weren’t sure about the exact meaning of the word. Probably a name, either of a person or of a place.
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[Mai thinking about Maki]
“You were always so carefree. I hated it. You just kept moving fearlessly forward into the future”
⇒ “I hated how you were always boldly pushing your way towards the future as if you had no worries/unease”
Imo a slightly different nuance for this line (which’s just a single sentence). “I hated how” could also be “I hated you for” and other translations for “pushing your way to” include “plunging forward”, “pushing on”. 
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(jp)
[About Mai’s cursed technique]
“Unlike creating an object inside a domain, objects created with cursed technique: construction will not disappear after the spell is finished. However, an immense amount of cursed energy is used, which has a harsh effect on the body”
⇒ “Unlike materialisation of an innate domain within the barrier that occurs in ‘domain expansion’, objects once created with Construction Technique will not disappear even after the technique has finished. That’s why(...)”
Ever wondered why domain and domain expansion related stuff is impossible to understand? Well, here’s why. They only left “inside a domain” out of the whole explanation... “Materialisation” was actually “realisation” but I thought the former would be easier to understand. Also it literally says only “realisation of an innate domain” but imo it could be also interpreted as “inner domain and things within in”.
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(jp)
“Maki has something I don’t. Kinda like Mechamaru’s Heavenly Restriction but the opposite. You were supposed to be born with a cursed technique but you traded that in for superhuman physical abilities. This skill was shunned by the Zen’in family. And it’s an ability I don’t have.”
⇒ “Maki has a talent I don’t have. (...) A talent which didn’t get appreciated in the Zen’in family and which I didn’t possess”
Like I pointed out earlier, this is the conclusion to Mai’s retrospection about herself and Maki and some of its effect was, in the original, achieved by repeating the line about Maki’s talent that Mai didn’t have, and by further expanding on it here.
Chapter 43
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[About Kamo’s attack]
“A trace of blood on the arrow fletching. Like I thought, Kamo’s technique defies physics”
⇒  "The physics defying trajectory [of the arrow] was because of Kamo-san's cursed technique after all"
More informative in the original, I’d say. The arrows themselves are (and look) normal, hence double the wham i suppose?
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[Megumi about Kamo’s Blood Manipulation Technique]
“The ability to control whatever touches his blood”
⇒ "The ability to control his own blood and whatever is stained with it" 
Why would they skip the "the blood itself" bit…
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[Kamo about Megumi’s Ten Shadows Technique”
“A cursed technique passed down in the Zen’in family”
Just to be clear, it’s actually specified here that it’s “one of the techniques”.
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[Kamo about his technique]
“I can manipulate blood beyond its form or motion”
Once again sounds a bit like a more general explanation. “To manipulate blood means (...)”.
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[After Megumi calls him out on doping]
“Very good. Although I don’t appreciate the negative connotation”
⇒ “But I’d prefer if you stopped with the vulgar phrasing”
Simpler, more direct language here.
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[After Maki’s taken off with Miwa’s sword in tow]
“Mai’s sister is gone. Well, that makes sense. I’m useless without my sword”
⇒ “Mai’s older sister has gone somewhere. Well, it was a correct call as I can’t fight without my sword”
The phrase used here that got translated as “I’m useless” while can indeed mean something similar has the nuance of “to not be useful [in battle]” . So although it’s not incorrect per se, I’m not sure if I’d go with “useless” myself, especially because it comes with tandem with “correct call”/”good decision” wording.  She DOES literally say she’s useless later on though.
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“We’re a little disorganized after all”
Not incorrect per se but imo the original line might’ve had the nuance of “we’re not monolithic [as an organisation]”.
“Use this scent and whistle to control it. If you can, make it kill Itadori”
⇒ “This scent and whistle were used to train him [this cursed spirit]. If a chance arises, use it well and kill Itadori”
I’m not sure if this can be interpreted as it being JUST the curse itself that’ll do all the work.
Chapter 44
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“- Why does everyone torment mother?
 - Because she’s a broken mistress”
Closer to “dissolute”, I think. Also the word used for “mistress” can also mean “concubine” and “kept woman” but it’s apparently also an old expression for “close female servant”. It’s hard to say which it could have been without more context but it’d actually make a lot of sense if it was the last one, especially given the fact how Kamo is one of the olden jujutsu families, and very traditional at that. 
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“Then why do you favour me? Why did you deceive me into becoming a heir”
⇒ “(...)Then why did you take me in and lie about me being a heir”
I may be wrong but it doesn’t sound like they deceived Kamo himself but rather, everyone else. The word used also means “falsify”. “Favour” here is the same word as for “patronage”, btw.
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“Then as the heir to the head of the Kamo family(...)”
It’s just “the next head” here, possibly an allusion to his plans for /after/ he becomes the clan head.
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[After Kamo praises his growth as a sorcerer]
“Why are you acting all familiar with me?’
⇒ “What’s with this sense of comradeship you keep on showing?”
Not incorrect per se but I found the phrase he used interesting. Also means “fellowship”.
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“I intend to kill Yuji Itadori”
“By principal Gakuganji’s order?”
“No, this is my decision.”
⇒ (...) “No, this is my personal/individual judgement.”
Emphasis Gege’s. The word does mean “decision” as well but imo “judgement” (as in “call”) fits better here.
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“As a member of the Kamo and the big three families, I believe it is the right decision. You should also understand it. (I must play the part of the heir to the Kamo family)”
⇒ “(...) I consider it a correct call. It’s something you should be able to understand as well. (I must conduct myself as is appropriate for the heir of the Kamo family)
Lit. “think it’s(...)” for the first bit. Imo “you should also understand” could imply that Kamo’s trying to convince Megumi here but in the original it’s more him appealing to the common understanding he feels must already exist between them because of their similar positions within their respective families. Also, wording his inner thoughts as “must play the part” was imo giving off a wrong impression. 
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Cont. from above
“You and I are the same”
Not wrong but the original has the connotation of “the same kind”.
“He’s saying some scary stuff”
Skipped “all of sudden" here.
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(jp)
“(I’ve never thought of myself as doing the right thing.) Actually, I’m sorry. I don’t care if I’m right or wrong. I only believe in my conscience. I will follow my conscience and save people. If you disagree with that then, let’s agree to curse each other.”
⇒ ”(...) No, I’m sorry, that is incorrect. It’s just that I believe/have faith in my own conscience. I will help/save people the way my conscience tells me. So if you’ve denied that, then there’s nothing left but to curse each other.”
Again, like in ch. 9 (refer to part I), the nuance here was actually that Megumi will save people BASED on his conscience. Here it’s literally “I will save people according to my conscience” (emphasis mine), which imo heavily implies that he will choose which people to save, as had already been indicated in ch. 9 as well. This is a huge distinction from the way he’s been (mis)portrayed in the official release as just wanting to save people because that’s what his conscience says or because he thinks that’s the right thing to do. (That’s Yuuji). Also, the way they phrased it as basically “let’s agree to disagree” was imo way too mild.  And it wasn’t just “if you disagree” but “if you contradict/negate/renounce”.
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“A shikigami! It was still around?!”
Not sure but given the context it might’ve meant “so he still had some left” instead.
Cont. on next page
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“He used a wounded shikigami as a decoy!”
⇒ “He used a shikigami at the verge of being called off as a decoy!” 
“This uses too much cursed energy, so I can only summon it once”
⇒ “This eats a lot of cursed energy so I can only summon it solo”
Lit. “a shikigami before the release/dissolution” for the first one. Coupled with Megumi’s reply, which was “as a stand alone” instead of “only once”, imo the whole thing meant that Megumi called the frog off intentionally.
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[Megumi about the elephant shikigami]
“It only recently surrendered to me.”
⇒ “I’ve only exorcised it very recently”
Seems like they confused “to exorcise” (調伏)  for “to surrender” (降伏)...The word he uses here is the former, it also means “to unwish”!
Btw, “surrender” is actually used later in the manga when Getou’s curse manipulation is discussed in the Gojou’s Past arc (ch. 73).. So to me there definitely seems to be a distinction between those two terms and which techniques they apply to.
[to part iv (4/5)]
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nanami-says · 3 years
Text
Part IV (4/5): chapters 45~49
Chapter 45
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[About talismans put on curses released for students to hunt during the group event]
“But even when exorcised with non-registered energy, it’ll burn red”
Not incorrect here, just pointing this bit out since it was mistranslated in the original explanation by Ichiji in ch. 40. (They kind of skipped the info about pre-registering cursed energy altogether.)
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U:“It must be an outsider. Maybe an intruder?”
M:“Does that mean Master Tengen’s protective barrier isn’t working?”
G:“Intruder or not, this is an unexpected situation”
⇒ U:“Somewhere from the outside… Do you mean an intruder?”
[Mei Mei’s line]
G:“Whether it’s [someone] from the outside or from the inside, it doesn’t change that fact that those are unforeseen circumstances”.
Utahime was more asking and not actually stating anything here. Could go with “outsider” too but I wanted to capture the nuance of her still musing here better. As for Gakuganji, he wasn’t actually reiterating the line about “intruder” but “from the outside”! I.e. that it doesn’t matter if they came from the outside (of the barrier, I’m assuming), or from the inside. 
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[Gojou talking about the curtain]
“We’ll just rip it apart once it’s complete”
⇒ “So all you have to do is just rip it apart after it’s gone down”
Not wrong but Gojou sounded cockier here haha.
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“In exchange for denying Satoru Gojo entrance, it gives everyone else free access”
⇒ “This is a [protective] barrier that, in exchange for denying ‘Gojou Satoru’ entrance, allows ‘everyone else’ besides that to enter and leave freely”
The original included more technical information, like Gojou calling it a “barrier” (結界/kekkai) even though normally the term used is “curtain” (帳/tobari). I’m not really sure on the specifics but, for example, the Jujutsu High is protected by Master Tengen’s “barrier” and when sorcerers want to conceal their fights from civilians they use a “curtain”. 
Also, the original has “Gojou Satoru” and “everyone else” put in quotation marks so imo they should’ve signaled that somehow in the official English release as well.
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“Why is there a cursed spirit here?”
Actually specifies “at Jujutsu High”.
“And whose curtain is that?”
“It’s probably coming from whomever is working with the cursed spirit”
Again, Megumi actually specifies that it’s “the curse user working(...)”.
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[After Megumi interprets Inumaki’s riceball language with Kamo present]
“You can understand what he’s saying?”
“Does that matter right now? It might use expansion on us. We need to contact Gojo-sensei”
Megumi only says “domain” here (and it’s put in quotation marks again to show it’s a term) and not “domain expansion”. Also, he sounds more dismissive because the first line is closer to, “Something like that doesn’t matter right now, does it”.
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[About Hanami’s speech] 
“What the-- I can understand the meaning behind the noises it makes”
⇒ “What’s that-- Even though I don’t get what it’s saying from the sound, I can still understand the meaning”
Not incorrect, just wanted to propose something closer to the original wording.
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“The forest, the sea, the sky… They’re crying from the tragedies they’ve withstood. We can no longer live in peace with humans”
⇒ (...) They’re crying how they cannot bear any more. Continued coexistence with humans is no longer possible.”
Imo the “can no longer coexist” referred to the forest, sky etc. Also just a slightly different nuance for the whole line, I suppose.
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“They know that there are humans who care for the planet. But how useful is mere compassion?”
Hanami doesn’t really call it “mere compassion”, just “that compassion”, or, literally, “kindness”, “affection”.
Chapter 46
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“We’ll have Inumaki stop it so we can keep some distance between us after we attack. We gotta do this if we’re gonna have a chance of getting out of the curtain. We need to find the principals.”
⇒ “Have Inumaki stop it, then we attack, and gain distance. Through a repeat of this, we’ll aim to get outside of the curtain and regroup with the principals”
Not incorrect per se but it sounded more like Kamo just describing their strategy to me. 
Cont. on the next page.
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“But how long can we keep this up. Inumaki’s cursed speech is losing effect. We can’t get in touch with the teachers either. It may even figure out a way to counter cursed speech.”
⇒ “But we don’t know when the current equilibrium will crumble. The effectiveness of cursed speech is bad as it is and we can’t even try and get in touch with the teachers. If he realises how to counter cursed speech, then it’s over.”
Lots of nuance lost here. First off, Kamo seems to have been talking about cursed speech’s low effectiveness in general, rather than referring to Inumaki getting weaker. And the line about the teachers actually said they “don’t even have a chance/space to contact” rather than that they’d already tried and failed.
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“Finding Todo is a priority. Even Miwa would do at this point.”
⇒ “I’d like to join up with Todo, or at the very least Miwa, as soon as possible but....”
“Even Miwa” makes it sound like Kamo doesn’t really value her but he’s actually ranking her quite high, as she seems to be his next option after Toudou.
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”The cursed speech he used wasn’t particularly strong, but his throat gave out. The enemy is that much stronger”
⇒ “Even though he wasn’t using a powerful spirit of language, Inumaki-senpai’s throat still got crushed. The difference in levels is just that huge”
When speaking about Inumaki here, Megumi actually didn’t refer to “cursed speech”, i.e. the technique, but “kotodama”, which’s what the technique uses, its main component, you could say. (“The spirit of language”, please refer to ch. 33 part IV (1/5). Also, as the phrase used in the last sentence is literally “higher rank”, imo it wasn’t so much about difference in pure strength by itself, as difference in levels (which will obviously also translate to difference in strength).
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“You can’t cut me with such sword”
He literally calls it “this blunt sword” here. 
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“Its eye branches are its weak point”
Closer to, “are more fragile/brittle than the rest [of him]”.
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[Maki about the new weapon she just switched to]
“But using this doesn’t feel right”
Actually “is vexing” or even “disgusting”, “revolting” etc., as, you know, it’s a weapon that used to belong to Getou, who once almost killed her. (Vol. 0)
Chapter 47
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[About Maki’s special grade weapon]
“Indeed, that is not bad”
Actually “this is a good one”, a different nuance.
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“Jujutsu sorcerers are interesting. And so emotional too. Every time one of their allies gets hurt, they leave new openings.”
⇒ “[It seems] jujutsu sorcerers are exceptionally compassionate.(...)”
What they translated as “interesting” was actually a descriptor for “compassionate”, which too imo is different from just “emotional”. All the possible translations given by the dictionary I checked are adverbs (highly, extremely, outstandingly, unusually, remarkably, exceptionally etc.), so imo, despite of how it was spaced in the original, it was intended as a single sentence.
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[After Hanami explains how the bud that’s gotten lodged in Megumi’s body works]
“How nice of you to explain! You’re planning on killing me anyway, right?”
“I hear it’s more effective once explained”
This bit is interesting because while it’d been stated before that explaining a technique can lend it more power, Hanami is actually talking about speed here. I guess you could argue regarding the actual differences between speed vs. effectiveness but he did only say that “it'll work faster” this way.
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[Hanami praising Maki]
“You have some nice moves”
Actually just “you can move well”, which imo has a slightly different nuance.
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“I need to use everything I’ve got! Even if I get ripped apart”
⇒ “{Got to] Muster all of my cursed energy, even if it means my stomach/guts will rip!”
“I get ripped apart” sounds more drastic than the original imo.
Cont. onto. 
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“I choose who I save, unlike the others. I’m bearing the least burden. That’s why it’s inexcusable that I be the first to go down!”
⇒ “I’m not like the others. I choose the people to protect. I’m not [the one] bearing the most burden. That’s why (...)”
Again some of the nuance of the original seems to have been altered imo. I’m not 100% sure re the line about bearing burden but I think the meaning was probably closer to what I suggested. I am sure that he said “people to protect” and not “people to save” here, though. 
Chapter 48
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[Nishimiya about Toudou]
“If nothing else, you’re strong”
The phrase used here actually means “redeeming feature”. So you know, in Nishimiya’s eyes Toudou may suck overall but being strong is his only saving grace.
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[Toudou to Megumi about Yuuji seeming different]
“You see it too. He’s beginning to spread his wings. He must find his own way. That is where he stands now.”
⇒ “So you’ve realised it too. When a person is beginning to spread their wings, it’s unforgiven for others to interfere. Itadori is in such a state right now”
Toudou was speaking rather loftily here, so maybe that’s why they seem to have gotten it slightly wrong but imo phrasing it as “must find his own way” didn’t really capture the original nuance of “it’s unforgiven for anyone else to so much as touch them”, which is what the second part of the sentence literally says. So it’s less emphasis on what Yuuji himself must do and more on what others aren’t allowed to do.
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[Hanami after judging Toudou as weaker than himself]
“But he’s got a strong presence.”
⇒ “But this mysterious brazenness…”
Could also go with “impudence”, “shamelessness”, “boldness” etc. here haha.
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[Hanami about Yuuji]
“You’re smart to close the distance. [I’ll commend you for that]
⇒ "You don't rush in recklessly. (...)"
...Literally the opposite meaning for this one. Hanami was commenting on Yuuji having attacked from the distance first.
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“More agile than the girl! But his strength is disappointing”
⇒ “His instantaneous force surpasses the girl from before! (...)”
The word also means “explosiveness”, “explosive power”, so imo it pointed to Yuuji being able to unleash a lot of power in a short amount of time (although the actual output still fell short in Hanami’s opinion). Idk why they made it “agile” instead...
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“Anger is a valuable trigger for a jujutsu sorcerer. There’ve been instances where people have been put on their heels after provoking an inferior opponent. The opposite is not good either. Mishandling cursed energy when angered, wastes your skills, and the fight will end in defeat.”
⇒ “‘Anger’ is an important trigger for jujutsu sorcerers. There are times when you can be beaten by a lower rank just because you’ve angered your opponent. Of course, the opposite is true as well. There are also times when you lose, because you became unable to draw out your true strength, with your cursed energy disrupted by anger”
They seem to have conveyed the nuance of Toudou’s lines here being a broader explanation this time but a lot of nuance has been lost nevertheless. Most importantly: “there are times” and not “there have’ve been instances”, this would be a different grammatical construction if the latter was the case; “the opposite is not good either” is just off; “wastes your skills” was imo unclear, it was closer to “can’t unleash your true power”.
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“Your friend Fushiguro is hurt. And worst of all, our bonding time as best friends got interrupted, so I understand better than anyone why you would lose your cool.”
⇒ “Your friend got hurt, and worst of all, the honeymoon with me, your best friend, got interrupted as well. So I can understand rea~~~~~lly well why you’d be boiling with rage”
Once again Toudou using a much more poetic/lofty language in the original was flattened down in the official English release. (“Are boiling with rage” becoming “lose control”, freaking “honeymoon” - and yes, he actually used that word lol - becoming “bonding time”.)
More importantly though, there have been several cases before, when I mentioned that something is written one way but read differently, but didn’t go into the details. (For example, Sukuna’s way of referring to Megumi and Nobara in chapter 7 (refer to part I), or Nobara speaking about the Kyoto principal in ch. 37 (part IV 2/5). This is where I finally explain this phenomenon a bit more in-depth, using Toudou, who’s probably the best example.
If you've ever studied Japanese, you're probably familiar with furigana used over/beside kanji characters to indicate pronunciation. For example, the word “shin’yuu” which means best friend, would be written in kanji 親友, and then have しんゆう written over it in hiragana. Here, the actual word and the way it’s read match.
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But in manga it's a fairly common practice to use furigana to provide an alternate reading. So you have 1) the actual text and 2) the reading.
  1) can sometimes supply additional information as well (e.g. written as “technique” but pronounced as “talent”) but mostly it’s included to provide context and specify something to the reader that the characters would be naturally aware of, and 2) is what the character is actually saying out loud in the scene.
So in this scene Toudou doesn’t really say Fushiguro’s name out loud and only calls him “[your] friend/comrade", because it’d be obvious to Yuuji from the context whom he means here.
The same also applies most of the time when Toudou addresses Yuuji, like in the line that got translated as “Itadori, my friend”. In this case, the text is “Itadori” (to indicate to the reader that Toudou truly addresses him here) but what he is saying out loud here is “my friend”, which, btw, is actually said in English even in the original. So he’s literally calling him “mai furendo” here, haha. (In general, Toudou seems to opt for English equivalents quite frequently in the manga.)
Whelp, this ended up very long but basically, whenever I say that “it’s written like XX, but he actually says YY”, this is what I mean!
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“But that anger is not for you. Suppress it for now”
⇒ “But that anger is too much for you. (...)”
Not 100% sure but this is probably closer to the original meaning. Also I just found the English translation really vague/unclear. 
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“Any more distractions?” 
“Nope”
⇒ ”Did they disappear? Distractions"
“Yeah, not a single cloud [left]”
Aww, this isn’t incorrect but the wording in the original is just so lovely.
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“Thank you so much. My best friend - Todo”
⇒ “(...), best friend!”
What I said for Toudou re text vs. pronounciation, except now it’s spreading, down to gratuitous English. 
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“For those who have experienced black flash, as compared to those who have not, their understanding of the essence of cursed energy is immeasurable.
⇒ “(...) the gap between their distance to the core of cursed energy is like heaven and earth”
Not incorrect but I really like the ring and the descriptiveness of the original wording.
Chapter 49
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“You got to taste a sample of your cursed energy”
⇒ “You’ve grasped the ‘taste’ of cursed energy”
Imo not Yuuji’s own but cursed energy as a whole, as in that Yuuji has glimpsed what cursed energy truly is.
Extended cooking metaphor cont. onto the next page
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“Until now, it’s like you’ve been putting ingredients that you’re not familiar with into a pot and cooking haphazardly”
Not incorrect per se but the original wording for the line about ingredients is “ingredients you never tasted yourself” and imo there’s a distinction.
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“But with black flash, you’ve gained the ingredient that is cursed energy. As a chef, or in this case, a jujutsu sorcerer, you’re on a different level than you were just three seconds ago”
⇒ “But now through ‘black flash’ you’ve grasped the ‘taste’ of the ingredient that is cursed energy. As a chef, you’re now standing in a completely different dimension than the you from 3 seconds ago”
It wasn’t the “ingredient” (cursed energy) itself that was emphasised here but the ingredient’s “taste” (essence of cursed energy). Also Toudou is actually extrapolating on what he said on the previous page and he even reiterates  his line from there (that mistakenly got translated as “you got to taste a sample of your cursed energy”). Overall, the text on those two pages just flowed better originally and wasn’t as disjointed. Also, this was another instance of text (jujutsu sorcerer) vs. pronunciation (chef)!
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“Congratulations brother. You will be strong”
Closer to “you will be able to grow strong”. Also, re “brother” - it’s written as "super best/close friend” and spoken out loud as “brother” and again, it’s actually pronounced in English (“brazaa”). Heck, Toudou also actually says “congratulations” in English too haha.
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[After Hanami has healed his own limb]
“It can heal itself?!”
“Cursed spirits are made from cursed energy”
Actually specifies that it’s the “bodies of cursed spirits” here.
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“But its cursed energy is undoubtedly weakened. If we get its head, then it’s game over.”
⇒ “But it [healing] will infallibly/certainly shave its cursed energy. And if you crush its head, it’s game over”
Again, imo a more general explanation on how self-healing works for cursed spirits.
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“I need to try a little harder”
⇒ “It seems it’ll be better to get serious to an extent”
Just to make sure that the nuance here is that Hanami had been holding back before. 
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“What a heavy hit! It’s not quite as heavy as the black flash hit from earlier. However, individually they have enough power to hurt me”
⇒ “Heavy! Not to the extent of the previous black flash hit but each [hit] has enough power to deal damage to me with certainty”
Imo the official release was a bit unclear, so I tried to tweak the wording. Especially the “individually” bit - imo it was intended to mean “each”. In other words, the two’s attacks, while not as powerful as black flash, are still potent enough to actually hurt Hanami with each respective hit.
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[After Hanami dissolves his technique and Yuuji and Toudou's footing disappears]
“Our footing! We underestimated it! With this amount of mass I thought it was manipulating physical branches with its cursed energy. But it’s the embodiment of cursed energy! It made the illusion real with just its cursed energy. That’s a special grade for you!”
⇒ ”(...) We let our guards down! (...) Everything was materialised and manifested just with his cursed energy!! (...)”
Like in the instance above, imo the way the official release translated it was really unclear, especially the line about “making illusion real”, which actually was just “manifest”. (Again, “materialisation” is actually “realisation” but I used the former to make it easier to understand.)
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(jp)
“You should be more true to yourself, Hanami”
“I’m not trying to be anything else”
“I’m not saying you’re lying. I know why you fight. But as long as we’re fighting, why not try to enjoy it?”
⇒ ”Hanami, you know, you should be more honest”
“I don’t think I’m pretending”
“It’s not like I’m calling you a liar or anything and I know what’s the objective you fight for. But I think you should try to enjoy the process - the present called ‘fight’ - more”
The meaning was there but I wanted to propose something closer to the original wording because it’s interesting to me how Mahito switches between very simple phrases and more complicated thought processes (like here he explicitly compares “objective”/”goal” and “the process”).
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[After Hanami asks whether Mahito enjoys fighting]
“The pleasure I feel while fighting didn’t motivate me much until recently”
⇒ “It’s not until recently that the joy, that the pleasure, I feel at the height of a fight have become my motive”
So it’s not like they didn’t motive him much but that they only recently became his motive/incentive to fight!! Quite a significant distinction imo.
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“Before I realised, all the deceit, cheating and killing left me satiated. Just like humans eat, sleep and rape, curses manifest instinctive behaviors as well”
⇒ “When I realised - deceit, tricking, killing - I’ve already been filled/satisfied without being aware of it. The same way humans eat, sleep and transgress/violate - for curses those are probably their instincts”
Not 100% sure about the first sentence but it’s something similar. Emphasis mine for the second sentence. In other words, it’s precisely deceit, tricking and killing that Mahito sees as curses’ instincts. Also the word that they translated as “rape” does indeed mean that as well, but imo it could’ve just as well been pointing to one of its more broader meanings, like “to violate” or “commit [crimes]”.
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“We might have gained reasoning, but that doesn’t mean we should deny our impulses”
Imo “reason” instead of “reasoning” and “fight against our instincts” (since the same word gets used) instead of “deny our impulses”. Especially since they translate it as “reason” in the next panel.
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“A spirit is blend of impulse and reason”
⇒ “A soul is a blend of instinct and reason”
Emphasis mine. I genuinely have no clue why the official release suddenly translated it differently here... Everywhere else they’d also gone with  “soul” whenever the word appeared before, which, needless to say, happened in almost every other instance of Mahito talking about his technique and/or philosophy. 
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“You all right, brother?”
“No problem!”
“There you go!” ⇒ “Splendid!”
Also means “excellent”, another example where in the original Toudou is using a lofty expression and which sadly got a cut in the official release. He’s so proud of everything that Yuuji does, okay. :”( The first two are fine. 
[to part iv (5/5)]
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