#like just not being from america doesn’t make u an automatically better person?? ur not idk. cooler by default?? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

explcsivcs · 5 years

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––––– ( jacob elordi, cismale, he/him ) i just saw CASEY O'NEILL walking down the street’s of provincetown the other day playing WATCH ME by JADEN out loud. rumor has it that the TWENTY-TWO year old is +CHARISMATIC, but can also be -RECKLESS — overall they’re a CRIMSON. they remind me of THE SOUND OF A REVVING CAR ENGINE, BOTTLE ROCKETS AT MIDNIGHT, NEUTRAL COLOR SCHEMES, and EMPTY MOVIE THEATERS. –– it’s your local idiot, here with a new child! he’s a mess, but aren’t they all ?? like this or whatevaaaa and i’ll come to u for PLOTS !

BACKGROUND.

casey boiiii was born in london to a couple’a rich folk. dad, sean, is the ceo of a massive pharmaceutical company, and mom, emma, is from old money but spends most of her time bein’ a lil socialite and doing heavy charity work. they were good for a long long time. like casey grew up wanting for nothing, attending elite private schools and just all around living The Dream™

his dad is stern and driven by logic and money. if it were up to him, he woulda been working 24/7 and leaving his son in the hands of a nanny until he was old enough to inherit the company lmao. his mama is the one who really ... held the family together. she stayed home with case, she made sure sean regularly spent time with the family. queen of holidays and sunday dinners. casey was absolutely a mama’s boy

all was well! until casey turned 12 and his mom fell terminally ill. she passed away within like six months of her diagnosis and yessir this is.. when shit hit the fan. sean became absolutely miserable and threw himself into work, thus throwing casey into the hands of house staff. he was rarely ever home and really... kind of just stopped dad duties and wallowed in his own grief.

casey tried desperately to get his dad’s attention back. he was making stellar grades, perfect grades even. he was in sports year around, and he was fucking good at them esp lacrosse. he ... fuckin learned to cook in hopes of taking after his mom and being able to keep sunday dinners going. he joined student council and even faked an interest in business. lil dude grew the fuck up at such a young age. and it! didn’t! work!

when he ... got into high school ... he got frustrated with his situation and started leaning into his unresolved anger because let me tell you he was ... pissed. about all of it. this is when he fell into the wrong crowd. he made friends who were rowdy and rude and violent, and he found that the most fervent things he felt was when he was doing something wrong. he ,.... dabbled in vandalism but also really started to get in trouble for fighting akdjfh

and it worked. his dad was halfway paying attention, being called into school after school as casey was suspended and occasionally even expelled for.. fighting. .. he was woken up in the middle of the night when casey was escorted home for being too drunk at a party or for getting caught street racing. every time they saw each other, his dad was screaming at him, but at least he was seeing him ya know??

casey really got into a lot of trouble when he got his license and began street racing. the adrenaline from racing kinda.... solved all of his problems?? like it dulled the anger and numbed the pain while also ... bringing him all the excitement and joy ya know.

when he was sixteen he uhhh got kicked outta the last private school in london that would take him for shitty attendance and fighting. the same week, he completely totaled his car, damn near killing himself in the process, by racing in a new housing development and uhhhh literally taking out an unfinished house (it’s ok all that was standing was like the wooden support beams aight) BUT it was either... spendin time in a juvenile detention center...... or being shipped off to stay with someone else and hopefully start over

so that’s what happened! good old sean o’neill said “nope” and sent his son to live with his brother in a tiny town in a tiny state in america. that’s right bois... when he was seventeen, case moved from london to provincetown. casey kinda saw this as... his dad giving up on him and got... angrier. but it’s better than prison so!

he was kind of... a brat when he got to provincetown. didn’t want to be there. didn’t want to be anywhere really. just broody and mad all the time. participated in sports solely to get some of the angry energy out but didn’t do much else. he’s really only a part of snackpack because his cousin (hiiiii bronny) is.... and he loves her tons so he was obligated to at least be civil to her friends

he ,... got his grades on track, for the most part... and stopped fighting, for the most part. but this dumb bitch can’t stop doing reckless shit. like i’m surprised he still has a license bc the number of speeding tickets is borderline not livable.

he never really felt like he... fit... in provincetown. he still doesn’t really know where he fits in the grand scheme of life. his grades and his dad’s bank account were the only reason he got into a decent college. he went for business, bc that’s all his dad would pay for, and his heart just wasn’t fuckin’ in it at all. he graduated in may but has no fuckin idea what he wants to do. at this rate though, if he keeps fucking around, he’s going to end up being :) a nothing :) just like good old dad expects :)

PERSONALITY.

very dude bro. like you look at him and you’re like ‘idk if i wanna fuck with that’ bc he is large and stupid confident ... sometimes arrogant. definitely one of those cocky smirk lookin, backwards hat wearin, lemme take u out types of assholes idk like he’s not broody ya know.

he doesn’t really initiate conversation. like he’s not one for small talk, kinda thinks its a lil bit of a waste of time. he’s not unapproachable.. he just values good, interesting conversation

think ... jess mariano from gilmore girls, ronan lynch from trc, and a lil sprinkle of brian o’conner from fast and furious kAJSDAHFA

his moral compass is outta whack ok! like life is not black and white in his mind. everything is grey

very clever boy. consciously makes bad decisions, but he’s clever as fuck. quick witted. he doesn’t look it but... ya boy is smart. just doesn’t fuckin’ apply himself

charming! but like ... into the woods charming, not cinderella charming. charming with an ulterior motive. charming to get what he wants. very rarely charming just for the hell of makin someone feel nice. selfish lil shit

fearless as hell, always down for adventure and a good time

a lot nicer to his close friends than he is to everyone else like akdfhas sorry @ everyone who isn’t in the snack pack ur automatically a lil bit worse in his mind

a massive flaw of his is that he truly doesn’t know how to handle his own emotions,. he’s become a pro at repressing them. even when they’re good . feelings, he has a hard time showing it?? that’s why he... acts out dude. he’s pissed

would die for his lil cuzzo y’all should know this now to prepare urself

fiercely loyal to his people

still luvs to fsu when he has the chance,,... loves a good adrenaline rush

surprisingly good at cheering people up. not great at comforting them! he’s workin’ on that... but he is good turning that frown upside down!

literally just needs someone to kick his ass.

PLOTS IDEAS.

a best friend... obvi. someone he clicked with as soon as he moved to ptown

frenemies bro... like they rag on each other all the time, they’re always competitive as hell, but in the end... they’ve got each other’s back type of frenemies

i have a plot in mind based on billie eilish’s ‘i love you’ that could be interesting aksdjfh specifically the ‘say you were tyrna make me laugh, and nothing has to change today you didn’t mean to say i love you’ line lol angsty

a mom friend! someone to kinda... keep an eye on him

partners in crime bro the kinda person that just..... when they’re together it’s next level . and borderline dangerous because they just continue to hype each other up and play off of each other

a bit of a hookup .. situation like kajsdf basically the type of shit you see in friends with benefits and no strings attached before they catch feelings. smth like a fling idk

college roommatesr

flirtationships or just generally flirty frienships those are s ofun

exes and unrequited loves and slowburns y’all know i’m a slut for that shit

ok that’s all!! this is so shitty lmao aksjfh ok like this and i’ll come to u for plotzzzzzz

#snackpackintro

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kayvsworld · 7 years

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Could u convince be not to hate Steve 'Hypocrite' Rogers? I'm really trying not to hate him but whnever I think about anything to do with him I just get even angrier at him. MCU Steve is a repentless fuck up and I wanna know what u have to say about him? U don't seem like u hate him and u also love Tony so I figure u probably see stuff I'm not seeing and I wanna know what ;u; (mostly so I can stomach stony fics to widen my range of reading material) :p

steve rogers is a stubborn emotionally-constipated asshole. i also love him very very much. here are some post-cacw thoughts on why i still love him:

flawed characters are good, and the only reason we expect Perfection from This Particular Human Character is bc other people (and…the narrative….) put him on a pedestal. I can’t be mad at him for doing what he thought was the right thing, because as a fan of tony stark, i know that sometimes things that seem like a good idea at the time are maybe actually not always that great

issue: banking on the fact that your rich genius teammate and his team of lawyers will still get you and your friend out of a bad situation After you let him know that the friend in question murdered his parents a week before christmas and that you’ve lived in his house and looked him in the eye while Knowing Abt This for several goddamn years is uh. a v scary situation and potentially a bad plan for 19 reasons. prioritize the people you know are ride or die & cut ur losses

some people are emotionally constipated assholes who do their best and fail miserably,,,,To Cope™

ok but seriously have you ever had 6.3 billion Terrible Things happen to you in rapid succession, and then One More Thing comes along (to take away the only remaining thing in your life you can control and the only semblance of normalcy you have left) and you just. dig your heels in automatically and go “absolutely fucking not”

like i will personally bet you 5 canadian dollars that steve has been crossing his arms and glaring at the tv for months like “listen what else do they want us to do. we’re helping. we’re the good guys. they Have To See That we’re good people and we’re doing our best and we saved the world Come On if we just wait…maybe…….it will…..Be Fine without us having to do anything? maybe?”

he’s been fighting to keep People™ safe for a While and it’s Apparently still not enough and he is probably tired and bitter and frustrated. also, last time he was working for/with a third party they turned out to be nazis and while i get that that 100% isn’t the same as a UN Panel (noT THE SAME, STEVEN) at some point you have to take a quote out of context, plant urself like a stubborn asshole tree, and say “actually no fuck you please just let me do the only thing that is giving my life meaning right now in a way that doesn’t make me feel trapped and afraid for myself and my team”

peggy (steve’s last connection to his life before waking up in the future) had just died, and bucky (steve’s surprise Actual last connection to his life before waking up in the future) has been having a Hell Time and is being targeted. sometimes when you find out your best friend has been brainwashed and tortured for 70 years, your bullshit meter maxes out and you (steve rogers, “fight me” personified) want to give the finger to anyone who wants to do absolutely else to that person. yes, getting him help was an option (the other option being some kind of prison?) but also, it still would have been someone else making that choice for bucky, and at some point yelling “can you please just leave him alone” with ur fists becomes a default reaction

as someone who regularly avoids things when i should really deal with them, i 100% believe that there is a large part of steve that genuinely thought he was protecting tony. sure, he was protecting himself and bucky, too, and he admits that openly, but i can buy that steve had been sitting on the couch for months listening to tony talk about Processing His Grief Through Technology and screaming internally like “would it truly and genuinely make it easier on this guy to know that his parents were brutally murdered by my friend and i’ve known abt it for 2 years when he’s still this messed up over it already oh my god”

the problems i have with a lot of steve’s choices really just come down to the film not giving him room to put up a legit argument. a lot of it was banking on me assuming that captain america & the team were correct bc they’re cap & the team in a captain america movie? if they had given steve a speech instead of a shitty letter, i’m sure i would have initially understood his side a lot better

some people are emotionally constipated assholes who do their best and fail miserably,,,,To Cope™ Part 2: The Letter

steve is not great at feelings. steve is not great at processing and expressing his feelings in a healthy way. steve is an all-or-nothing prickly bitch (see: every film he’s been in) and taking these excellent canon facts into account, i do actually genuinely believe that this dude forced himself to sit down while in hiding to write 12 different drafts of this letter by hand in cursive and eventually ended up with the monstrosity tony received

he can’t apologize for the accords situation, because he doesn’t think he’s wrong, so he can only apologize for hurting tony. “i’m not sorry for what i did but i’m sorry that it hurt you” is a shitty thing to read and say but i guess at least,,,he,,,was honest? steven why didn’t you get a friend to proofread this letter

by saying that the avengers are more tony’s family than his, he probably thinks he’s acknowledging that tony cares about them and was doing what he thought was best. im personally for my own sanity choosing to believe that.

“i’ve never really fit in” aka “okay i definitely didn’t talk enough about where i was coming from at all for the past few…..years….and this was the only draft that included my ‘i’ve been lowkey struggling’ admission and didn’t sound vaguely pathetic or directly mention my friend who involuntarily murdered your parents”

this entire thing is actually imo a fairly decent “listen i know things are really messy right now and i hurt you and we’re both still upset, but here’s some effort on my part. if you ever need anything, here’s how you can contact me & i promise i will still drop everything to come help you with what you need” gesture considering the situation & time frame

anyway, steve for sure messed up with his approach to this and put a lot of people in danger, but as someone who is a fan of tony stark i have to take The Context into consideration and also understand that sometimes people do questionable things even while having the best intentions. it was a really rough situation and i think mr evans did a great job of showing steve emotionally shutting down and struggling for the past few films? i can see where he was coming from from an emotional standpoint, & bc of these and 130 other reach-y reasons including me just enjoying him as a person, i forgive him. it’s 2:30am this is so long oh my god

#kayvswords #L O N G P O S T #long post #holy shit i'm sorry i just have a lot of feelings abt steve???#seibir

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littlespoonevan · 7 years

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U TAGGED THAT PIC OF TARJEI AND HENRIK AS MODEL AU AND NOW I NEED U TO WRITE IT PLS ALSO I LOVE ALL UR WRITING THANK

anon said:You can’t just put something like model au in my head and NOT write it!!!!

anon said:EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AUEVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU EVAK MODEL AU!!!!!!!! 👀👀👀👀👀👀

skajdfshjsdfh the picture everyone is referring to is this one. lmao please enjoy some unresolved sexual tension in the name of advertising jeans ;)

Isak shows up to his shoot with two minutes to spareand Eskild blustering along half a step behind him, insisting it’s fine, we’re not late, Isak. Ingeneral, with life, Isak can admit he’s not the most punctual person – he likeshis bed far too much – but when it comes to work he likes to be on time. He doesn’twant to fall into that awful stereotype of the bitchy model who makes everyonewait on him or gives unreasonable demands.

He’s chill.That’s why he gets hired – besides his appearance – people like working withhim because he isn’t fussy and generally makes life easier for everyone on setby being that way. It helps that Eskild only ever gets him gigs that Isak is100% comfortable shooting and that Eskild is always willing to step in and bethe bad guy on set whenever anything inappropriate happens. He’ll pull Isak fromshoots without so much as a backward glance at the awful director orphotographer or campaign manager when something happens to make himuncomfortable.

See, Isak appreciates Eskild, he does, he just doesn’t appreciate the factthat Eskild made them get on the wrong tram today and now Isak is sweatingthrough his t-shirt and showing up to set with a flushed face.

The photographer and another boy are the only peoplein the room when Isak and Eskild crash through the door and they both look upfrom the camera in shock at Isak’s admittedly loud entrance.

Isak grinds to a halt, huffing out a breath, andattempting to cross the room at a more sedate pace. “Halla, Mikael,” he greetsin a rush, extending his hand to the photographer. “Sorry to keep you waiting.”He’s worked with Mikael before so he knows he probably doesn’t care but hestill feels bad.

Mikael waves a hand before hopping out of his chairto shake Isak’s. “It’s cool, man. You’re like, one minute late.”

“That’s my fault,” Eskild says, stepping neatly aroundIsak to clasp Mikael’s hand. “Got on the wrong tram.”

Mikael laughs. “You’d think we’d figure it outeventually after living in Oslo all our lives, huh? But you’re good, don’tworry. We’ve got plenty of time before we need to start so I’ll get one of thehandlers to show you to your dressing room and send hair and makeup in afteryou’ve showered.”

Well, good to know the sweat stains have officiallyseeped through his shirt now.

Isak winces but nods. “Thank you.”

Mikael offers him a good-natured grin before his eyessuddenly widen as if he’s just remembered something. “Oh shit, sorry. Isak,meet your partner for the day.” Mikael whirls around, gesturing to the boybehind him. “This is Even.”

Isak had been so distracted by making sure Mikaelwasn’t angry at him he hadn’t even bothered to take in the other person in theroom. But fuck, he wishes he had.

The boy’s fucking stunning. Taller than Isak, thoughnot by much, with swooping blonde hair and bright blue eyes and the dreamiest smile Isak has possibly everbeen on the receiving end of. He’s so busy drinking in Even’s appearance ittakes a second for Mikael’s words to register.

Partner?!

Isak knew this was a partner shoot. However Eskildnever specified it was a male/malepartner shoot. It’s not like Isak’s averse to the idea – that’s kind of theopposite of the problem – but he’s just become so used to a partner shootmeaning having some leggy girl draped over him while he pretends to think she’sthe sexiest human being alive.

He’s pretty sure he’s just laid eyes on the sexiesthuman being alive. And he’s definitely not a girl.

God, he’s so fucked.

Even steps forward, darting around Mikael andoffering him a hand. “Halla! Isak, right?”

Isak takes his hand, repressing the squeak he almostlets out as Even’s hand presses against his palm, and nods his head. “Yeah,nice to meet you.”

“I better let you two get ready,” Mikael says, makingIsak jump and abruptly drop Even’s hand.

Isak is ushered into a dressing room and as soon asthe door is closed behind them, he rounds on Eskild. “You didn’t tell me mypartner would be male!”

Eskild gives him an unimpressed look, crossing hisarms over his chest. “Isak, you’re gay. What do you care?”

“Exactly!” he screeches shrilly, throwing his handsup in exasperation.

Eskild’s expression turns appraising as a calculatingsmile slowly spreads across his face. “Wait, are you attracted to him?”

Isak lets out a noise somewhere between indignationand agreement, gesturing wildly at the door. “You saw him! What do you think?!”

Eskild is positively beaming now as he tilts hishead. “Oh, Isak.”

“Shut up. This isn’t helping. You could’ve at least warned me.” He slumps down in the chairin front of the vanity, propping his elbows on his knees and burying his facein his hands.

“Oh relax, would you?” Eskild tuts. “You’re aprofessional, Isak. You can last one shoot before jumping the boy’s bones. Justask him out for a drink after you’re done.”

Isak makes a noise akin to that of a dying cat,ignoring the unsympathetic pat Eskild gives his shoulder.

“Go shower, baby gay,” Eskild tells him. “I’ll cometo collect you when hair and makeup are done.”

With that, Eskild slips out the door again, leavingIsak to have his existential crisis in peace.

Just over an hour later Isak is being led back on setwith freshly fluffed curls and concealer covering his blemishes, feelinggoosebumps erupt across his torso from the chill in the room. They’readvertising jeans so naturally they’resupposed to be shirtless. Isak had considered the fact inconsequential until herealised Even would also beshirtless.

Even is already chatting with Mikael when Isakarrives, and his knees almost give out when he takes in the expanse of Even’ssmooth chest, dotted with moles and lightly defined. The fact that his jeanslook like they’re painted on doesn’t help either.

He’s not going to survive this shoot.

Mikael looks up as he approaches, giving him a thumb’sup. “You look great, dude! Come over here; I was just giving Even a rundown ofthe shoot.”

Isak takes a few tentative steps closer, leaving agenerous amount of space between himself and Even – though he can still feelthe heat coming off Even’s body.

“So, we’re gonna keep it pretty simple,” Mikael tellsthem. “We want it to be sensual, sexy, but also intimate, you know? Sex sellsand everything but we can definitely add a little meaning to it.”

Isak nods, swallowing hard at Even’s enthusiastic, “Sure.”

“Okay, so we’ll do standing shots for now. If there’sanything you’re not comfortable with just shout out but other than that, dowhat feels natural.”

Mikael directs them to their marks and they have afew minutes while the camera is being set up where they’re just standing acrossfrom one another, only half a metre apart, and Isak can feel his heart ratepicking up under Even’s curious gaze.

“I’ve seen some of your work before,” Even says aftera beat of silence that they both spend rocking on their heels, startling Isakand making his eyes go wide. “You’re really talented.”

“Thanks,” Isak replies, dumbfounded. “I- I haven’tseen you around much.” Because he would definitely remember that face.

Even offers him an amused grin, huffing out a littlelaugh. “I’ve actually been studying in America for the past year so I starteddoing work over there to help with rent money. I haven’t been back in Oslo longand Mikael’s a friend so he hooked me up with this gig.”

“That was nice of him,” Isak says timidly, feelinghis cheeks heat when Even’s smile brightens.

“Mm,” he hums in agreement, eyes sparkling like Isak’sawkwardness is endlessly endearing.

Isak scrambles for something to say but Mikael callsthem to attention before he can come up with anything.

“Okay, let’s start it off simple,” he says. “Even,could you put your hands on Isak’s waist? Like you’re pulling him in? Isak,could you put your right hand on Even’s neck? Put your left wherever feelscomfortable, it won’t be in shot anyway. Just stand a little bit closer for meguys and we’re good to go.”

They move automatically and Isak tries to put himselfin his professional, detached frame of mind but as soon as Even’s hands fit tohis waist he feels his mouth go dry. He dutifully puts his right hand over Even’sneck, feeling his pulse point flutter under his palm and places his left onEven’s shoulder, figuring that’s the safest option. They’re close enough nowthat their chests are almost touching and Isak can feel the phantom brush ofEven’s stomach against his own every time he breathes.

“Great!” Mikael calls but Isak can’t look away fromEven long enough to look at him. “Alright, relax your stances a bit and lookinto each other’s eyes. Remember we’re going for sensual but intimate!”

Wetting his lips, Isak lifts his gaze from Even’scollarbones to Even’s eyes and feels his breath catch in his throat. Even’seyes are smouldering and Isak is pretty sure the way his own mouth parts at thesight isn’t on purpose. He doesn’t realise he’s leaning forward until a straystrand of hair that’s come loose from Even’s quiff brushes against hisforehead. He freezes at the touch and, through hooded eyes, just about catchesthe way Even’s lips twitch.

“That looks awesome, guys!” Mikael calls and Isakfinally becomes aware of the clicking of the camera once again. Honestly, hehadn’t heard it over the blood rushing in his ears.

“Alright, Even could you move forward? Maybe put aleg between Isak’s? Isak, could you widen your stance a little?”

Isak obediently moves his feet to standshoulder-width apart and tries not to burst into flames when Even’s leg slowlypresses between his own, thigh just barely brushing Isak’s crotch. Isak bitesthe inside of his cheek to stop himself from reacting.

“Sick,” Mikael declares once they hold the positionand Isak tries desperately to focus on the sound of camera clicking. “Can youlean in again like you were before? Even, maybe move your hand to cup Isak’scheek? Like you’re about to kiss.”

Jesus fucking christ is Mikael trying to kill Isak?!

“Isak, feel free to move your hands too; whateverfeels right!”

Isak barely hears Mikael’s words over Even’s fingersslowly trailing across his jaw, palm fitting to Isak’s jaw as their foreheadsconnect. Isak’s throat bobs and he moves his hands, sliding his fingers intoEven’s hair, and he can’t tell if the shaky intake of breath he hears from Evenis real or imagined.

Their noses brush and their lips part and fuck, Isak knows they’re not going to kiss but itsure as hell feels like it.

It’s agony –to remain still, not to close the distance. His mouth is like sandpaper and hisfingers keep tightening in Even’s hair. Jesus christ, what does this even haveto do with selling jeans?

The rest of the shoot passes by in much the samefashion and when Mikael moves to stand next to them, instructing Even to crowdIsak against the white wall behind them so they’re pressed flush together, Isakvery nearly passes out. Or gets a boner. It’s a tossup between the two, really.

They don’t talk while they shoot – honestly, Isakdoesn’t think he can speak now anyway – and he spends the entire timeperfecting the art of looking at Even without really looking at him. He doeswonder idly though, if Even is naturally this warm or if his skin is justflushed from the shoot. And that’s athought he probably shouldn’t entertain.

It’s almost the end of the shoot. Isak is stillpressed against the wall, one leg hitched over Even’s waist, their hipsperfectly aligned with Even’s hands in his hair and on his waist. His own handsare still buried in Even’s hair and their lips are so close Isak is secondsaway from saying fuck it and kissinghim like he’s been dying to all afternoon.

Even inhales a ragged breath and Isak feels his heartthump heavily in his chest at the thought that this is having the same effecton Even as it is on him.

Their eyes flicker to each other and his breathcatches in a tiny gasp when he sees the way Even’s bright blue eyes have beenalmost swallowed up by his dilated pupils. His gaze flicks down to Even’s mouthand in the same moment he notices Even’s eyes doing the same. Fuck, they’regoing to kiss. They can just say it was part of the shoot.

They’re going to kiss. They’re going to-

“And that’s a wrap!” Mikael exclaims, making themboth jump so hard their foreheads bump. “Shit, we got so much good material.You guys have insane chemistry.”

Mikael trails away from them when he doesn’t get aresponse, turning instead to his assistant photographer to examine the photoson the camera.

Isak’s leg had dropped from Even’s hip when Mikaelspoke but their hands are still twisted up in each other and when they slowlylook back to each other Isak has to remind himself to breathe.

He opens his mouth to say something but Even beatshim to it.

“Go for a drink with me later?” he asks in a rush,eyes wide like he didn’t expect himself to say that.

A disbelieving laugh is punched out of Isak’s chestand he nods, uttering a breathless, “Yeah.”

Even grins, shoulders slumping in relief and lookingendearingly awkward as he glances off to the side. “We should probably um- getchanged or-“

Isak doesn’t let him finish his sentence, using thehands still in Even’s hair to reel him in and crush their mouths together.After a moment’s surprise, Even responds enthusiastically, pressing Isak morefirmly back against the wall and squeezing his hips. Isak feels like all hisnerve-endings are on fire and it’s only the knowledge that they’re not alone inthe room that makes him rip his mouth away from Even’s after a searing moment.

“I couldn’t have waited ‘til tonight to do that,”Isak admits with a huff.

Even had been staring at him from the moment theyseparated but the incredulous smile that spreads onto his face at Isak’s wordsis something else.

They look at each other for a moment, grinningstupidly, and this is the last thing Isak expected to happen when he showed upfor the shoot today.

They’re brought back to reality with two peoplepointedly clearing their throats. Their heads snap to the side at the same timeand Isak finds Eskild and Mikael watching them with a mixture of incredulityand amusement.

After a beat of silence, Mikael turns to Even. “Iasked you to do this shoot to get you a job, not a date.”

Even pauses before looking back to Isak with playfulgrin. When his gaze returns to Mikael he sniffs. “Please, Mikael. I got that myself.”

(He ends up getting more than just a date.)

#evak #isak valtersen #even bech næsheim #skam #my fics #nahidontknowman #asks

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fragiilexa · 7 years

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1 - 10

identity ask………oh shit ACCEPTING

1. if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

Hm, well I guess this is three questions omg but I’ll just go down the line. If they wanted to really understand me they’d have to read the Bible, which I know is saying a lot in one thing. But the reason I am the way I am is because of the things I’ve learned from that book and I would not be who I am without it. Of course I actually haven’t been able to read the whole thing yet but I take a lot of who I am from it & it’s just something that’s shaped me as a person? Oh but also I really don’t read books much anymore, but if I had to give another one it would be The Last Song? Maybe? ( The book is better than the movie, even tho I like the movie, the books better ) It just talks a lot about forgiveness & stuff and it was a lesson I really needed to learn at the time I read it & also am still learning. OH and also Crazy Love by Francis Chan, which is like a christian book, but it’s also had a huge impact on me, okay but onto watchin’.

Okay this is hard because there isn’t one full thing you could watch where the whole thing has impacted me. But there are a lot of movies I’ve learned from, ( and also since this doesn’t say specifically movies ) there are also a few speeches that I’ve really learned from ( and people would probably be able to understand me better if they watched them. But I can’t name those right now? But, I’d have to say, like, not as a whole, but Dr. Who, at least some specific episodes. Uh, Captain America?? The Help? There are more but I have a hard time naming movies/shows.

Okay and then music, fricken music, okay I could put so so so so many songs down, songs are like the soul of my life & help make me, me BUT I’m just going to give you ONE because if I didn’t this would go on forever and TWO it’s kind of my theme song but I Was Here, by the queen Beyonce. Is like, hands down my favorite *what makes me, me* song. I could name a lot more. I could make a 24 hour long playlist. But I won’t bc that would take forever.

2. have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who?

Yes, There have been a few and most of them are not on anymore but, Kae I think I can solidly say we think very similarly on just, like, how to develop muses, how to work out characters and how REAL they’re supposed to be, you know? Characters can, and should have flaws and no one has tons of perfect relationships. Real life is messy & writing should reflect that & I think we are just hella synced with that message & feeling and she’s just lovely so yeah @spookylip is bae & we think alike ( obviously bc we took those selfies that matched wITHOUT EVEN KNOWING ) we are #one

3. list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with.

Girl Meets World: Riley Matthews.Glee: Tina Cohen - Chang.Marvel: Captain America, Steve Rogers.Hamilton: Eliza or Peggy SchyulerDisney: HeiHei ( no just kidding ) Moana, Princess Anna, Rapunzel,Harry Potter: Newt ScamanderStar Wars: FinnMy Little Pony: ( don’t u dare judge ) FlutterShyTwilight: Alice Cullen

4. do you like your name? is there another name you think would fit you better?

Okay so I used to not like my name so much ‘cause it was really bland & there were a lot of other girls named rebecca when I was in school, then people started calling me rachel so it was like ‘my name is totally forgettable’ ( or i was i dunno ) but over the past few years I’ve started to love it, though someone ruINED the meaning of it for me *side eyes that kinky anon* but I don’t really care & I love my name now, just, never ever call me becky or I will murder u in ur sleep. :))))

5. do you think of yourself as a human being or a human doing? do you identify yourself by the things you do?

I was slightly confused reading this but I re-read it & now I get it. I think at the moment, or for the longest time I’ve been a human being, like, there are just no opportunities right now for me to be doing what others my age are, or even younger than me. Not only that but I have to work on a lot of anxieties of mine, but that being said I don’t think I’m doing nothing. What I’m doing is small, yeah, but I try to do the best I can with what I have & I have a lot of faith that things happen for a reason & right now I’m keeping things going in my family & trying to better myself, no matter how many downsides that has, sort of. & I do Identify myself by the things I do, mostly because in doing something you have the opportunity to help someone. I try to do the right things, sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t but it’s a daily thing, y’know?

6. are you religious/spiritual?

Yah. You can see that with some of my answers but I am, though I know right now a lot of people assume that if you’re religious ( especially christian, on this site at least ) that it automatically means you’re this, this & this *insert any form of ism or phobic term* but that’s really not how it works. We’re all sinners & no matter what that still doesn’t change the way God feels about us ( no matter what, we, as humans think is sin, or sinful ) I could go on a lot about this topic, honestly it’s a big part of who I am. But personally, I love God, I have a personal relationship with him that I try to work on daily & grow with him daily, my God is all loving and I just wished more people my age, or at least people on here knew that?? I dunno, there’s just so much rhetoric surrounding Christianity & most of it is wrong & I just??? Mmmm I’m getting off topic but yes! I am! It’s like a huge part of what keeps me going, I love Jesus.

7. do you care about your ethnicity?

YES. Oh my Gosh yeah, okay well I’m white, lmao, but where I come from is still like, really important to me. It used to not be. I actually used to be kind of… not ashamed but embarrassed when my Mom did really dutch things. Like, ok backing up, My grandpa moved here from the Netherlands when he was in his early teens around the time that the holocaust happened, though I couldn’t give you the exact date because I’m hella forgetful but he came with his parents and he met my Grandma and u know the deal it goes down the line. But anyways I used to like, not like the things that came with being dutch, like, I just thought it was all stupid & silly, like clogs & doilies & stupid little things like my great grandma & grandpa always used to use forks & knives with everything because it was a custom where they came from & like, it’s all small things but over the years I’ve just learned to be really proud of where my family came from? My Grandpa went through a lot to come here, he saw a lot of things he never talked about and I didn’t know him well because I was young when he died but I just really love embracing my heritage there & stuff.

Like I’m white yes, and I’m basically a ‘mystery white’ ‘cause my dad is a mutt & my mom isn’t fully dutch either. I’m one of those 10% Irish 25% Hungarian 50% Dutch & 15% other type of whites, but??? I’m still proud of all of it?? Like I love learning about where I came from & who I am & I think everyone should be proud of all parts of their ethnicity. As Matthew Montgomery said: “ Love all your percentages. “

8. what musical artists have you most felt connected to over your lifetime?

shiT fam, this is getting so long & it’s gonna get longer, okay let me just do like… two, tha two tops…

Demi Lovato: Obviously, I mean… obviously She is one of the people I look up to most and I don’t know where I would be if I never had her & her music in my life. She’s taught me so much about strength and confidence and overcoming something when it looks like it will be impossible. She’s helpped me grow into someone who cares & wants to learn & help others and I just admire her so much for what she’s done, for herself, for others and for never giving up when she could have. Not to mention the ballads that have helped me through really hard times, or the speeches she’s given that remind me I’m strong & capable

Taylor Swift: *que everyone groaning who’s reading* anYWAYS I can’t even honestly write down or explain how many times that Taylor and her music has helped me when I felt like I wanted to give up, or how many times I have cried listening to songs that should not have resonated with me but did. She’s helped me to realize not only that I am important but that no matter what, despite what people may do to me, or make me feel that I’m still important and worth working on. She’s also shown me what goofing off can do to make you feel better, how not giving a shit has helped me move on from past relationships and how being unapologetically ME is okay

In fact, I feel like Demi’s taught me those things too. But they’ve both done it in different ways, which I think shows how beautiful loving yourself can be. Because you don’t have to love yourself how another person loves themselves. You have to figure out your own, unique way to view yourself & believe in yourself & love yourself & I think that’s just really beautiful. Now, they both hate each other ( or at least severely dislike one another ) but I just feel like they’ve both done so much for me and I don’t think I could thank either of them enough for showing me strength, beauty, confidence and love in the way they have. It’s insane how much of an impact people can have but they have. I could go on but I woont I promise.

9. are you an artist?

YES I am, though my skill can be debated I love drawing when I’m in the mood & painting & jst everything that has to do with art.

10. do you have a creed?

I don’t know if this means religious, or… otherwise… but I mean, technically I’m a baptist christian ( i think? not sure anymore ) but like, I am Christian, I feel like, sadly, the beliefs I hold are a bit left leaning & less erm, strict? When it comes to how I interpret the bible, where as a my family is different, I think? I don’t know, but I just try to follow the teachings of Jesus & his disciples. “ Love others as I have loved you - John 15:12 “ I do go by other teachings but I think that’s the top of my list. Jesus loves us unconditionally, he died for us, lived for us, and rose again so we didn’t have to burn up in hell for eternity. The least I can do is show everyone the same kind of unconditional love he’s showed me throughout my life & make sure people know that though we do sin & are inherently bad at heart, he still loves us despite our downfalls and doubt. I don’t know if that really answers this question but I had to look up creed & this is the best answer I came up with SO, thank u for sending this in and I love u

#THIS GOT SO LONG OOPS #BUT THANK U BLESS U I LOVE MEMES #smilerpc #⌘ ||▷ тalĸ тo мe вaвy ▹▹ ( ▨ ' answered by me. )

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