#like poetry slams except people read excerpts from their old diaries

[polaroidcats]

that is SO COOL that 13 yr old did that with your diaries. I'm jealous! are there any particular insights you get from reading what past you had to say? and/or teenage wisdom that we grown ups could use a reminder of?

hehehe thank you!! I love that diary so much, you have to imagine 13 year old me who was not like other girls (spoiler: yeah she was), who had just read sophie's world by jostein gaarder and thought herself a great philosopher (good for her), listening to "Conversations with my 13 year old self" by Pink on repeat (thought I was SO CLEVER with that), slowly transcribing all her old diaries into a new one, making sure that her comments are in a different pen colour (purple) to the original diary text (blue-black fountain pen ink) and that all the entries from the different diaries were in chronological order.

some of my favorite things are:

the whole first page is just me complaining about not finding the purple pen I wanted to use originally, so I had to use another purple pen, and then I go on about how I really should clean my room more often.

the next page is me finding the pen and actually starting the first letter to myself, telling me to ONLY READ THIS WHEN YOU'RE GROWN UP and explaining how I wanted to document what I was like at 13 in case I ever look back and wonder why I was the way I was or what I thought about certain things. I remember feeling so different at 13 than I had at 11 or 12 and being scared of change and of losing the way I felt at the time so I had this very strong urge to write down all my thoughts. This was also definitely influenced by sophie's world, bc the author talks about how children are the best philosophers and how we lose that ability as we grow up if we're not careful.

Even now, I keep going back to that diary every few years to add a little letter to future me in the back, so now I have a collection of letters from 13, and then 18-now, I love reading through it!

11 year old me lied about her "first kiss" (peck on the cheek at spin the bottle), and wrote a different guy's name who technically was my "second kiss" (peck on BOTH CHEEKS PLUS A HUG at spin the bottle.. that game ESCALATED QUICKLY and 11 yo me stopped playing when we got to the kiss on the mouth round haha bless her). 13 year old me called 11yo me out but still wrote a wrong guy's name LOL

13 year old me talks about what a boy-crazy partygirl 12 year old me (went to 2 boy-girl parties in one (1!) year!!) was and how NOW AT THE VERY MATURE AGE OF 13 I don't care about parties anymore (I stopped being friends with the cool kids and wasn't invited to any parties anymore) and I READ BOOKS ABOUT PHILOSOPHY NOW AND SPEND ALL MY TIME THINKING ABOUT PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTIONS. (13 yo me truly was a philisopher, but also the queerness and alienation from my peers was showing and I was compensating in an aggressive not like other girls kinda way)

#ask #ramblings #about me #hehehe thanks for sending me this #idk if this is a thing in other places (it should be bc its so fun) but where i live there are sometimes diary slams #like poetry slams except people read excerpts from their old diaries #and one of my friends is always trying to get me to sign up for one with that diary hahah #maybe one day #jamesunderwater