#look i was trying to write some canonverse stuff that got dark as fuck immediately so enjoy some jewish content where everyone doesn't die

[rotzaprachim]

the vaguely fleabag-inspired awkward jewish dramedy of my dreams au

Well, Jyn may have had a list of methods to ruin her estranged father’s second marriage, but punching her boss’s shmuck of a husband during the rehearsal dinner sure wasn’t one of them.

And neither was shagging the rabbi.

#you think this is a romance au but actually what it's about is jyn starting to process her grief over saw in a communal fashion by showing #up to make minyan for the kaddish. that's what it's about. #jyn erso #cassian andor #rebelcaptain #jyn thirty seconds into her dad's rehearsal dinner *uh i have to go to the bathroom* flash forward to facebook stalking RABBI ANDOR #MARRIED?????? #look i was trying to write some canonverse stuff that got dark as fuck immediately so enjoy some jewish content where everyone doesn't die #immediately #but unironically it got into some super meta territory for me that's super interesting in regards to like.. the difficulties and #complexities of FORMING and PRESERVING jewish community in the present when it always feels like a fight. always is a form of rebellion #really. jyn's a secular ashkenazi jew who doesn't want much to do with the /structures/ of community #.... understandably so with so many things about uh the conservatism of many aspects of british orthodoxy and their impact in the uk .... #and cassian's like not all of us have the priviledge of that really. sometimes you have to form new communities and it's hard #ask questions and it's hard. work actively to reform sephardi community here within these structures we've inherited #ANYWAY the other thing that happens is that jyn punches perrin just like so so hard. so hard #rebelcaptain au

[kinkymagnus]

Twi YouTube AU?? 👀

dlgjk ok i dont have a coherent au idea i just like the idea of like. 

alec being this confident youtuber man who does all sorts of shit, like funny vlogs and maybe some sketches with his siblings or some lets plays or something, idk, he’s just a popular youtuber like, idk, fuckin markiplier or something, you know, kinda does a lot of stuff. maybe some fashion/interior design shit? idk? but like. he’s pretty popular and if there’s any list on tumblr that’s like “some queer creators you should try watching” he’s always up there because he’s pretty open about being gay. maybe at first he wasn’t in the earlier youtube days but he had a pretty emotional coming out video and everyone was like “holy shit” 

meanwhile magnus is like, a quietly popular youtuber, you know? kind of a niche audience, but with decent numbers. he does a lot of things, like vlogs about being trans. like, oh my god. magnus documenting his transition? would that even be a thing? wait oh my god is this mundane au, or is this canon? because twi magnus who’s actually a warlock with a youtube channel would be hilarious but maybe not a good idea. you know what? how about a mix. he’s mortal and was born in modern times and all, he’s like the same age as alec–idk why but i’m thinking he’s like a few weeks older or a month or two older than alec and alec jokingly teases him about being old–but he like…. still has magic, because why the fuck not. actually, you know what? fuck it? it’s an au where magic is just openly a thing. not even necessarily canonverse magic, just. some people have magic. magnus does little tutorials and shit, he has a real talent for it and he’s actually really powerful but he hides that. (possible plotline: some paparazzi discover he’s like, a level ten mage, and it’s a scale from 1-10 and 8 is the most powerful u get most of the time, there’s been a few really famous 9s and there’s been one 10 ever and that was fucking merlin. you feel. because why not. idek fuck.) anyway he has little diy make your own magical charms and weaving enchantment and safe summoning circles and tips for writing magical contracts and shit like that. he’s this cute little nerd but he’s like incredibly knowledgeable and he knows how to teach it in a way that’s understandable and accessible? and he answers questions in really clear ways, and he does amazing demonstrations that look so cool people accuse him of editing but he’s just That Good. and he’s like, actually a really well-published wizard/magic scientist, he invented the fucking portal, but probably under a pseudonym because he doesn’t really want the attention. (his last name is fell in honor of his mentor. yes. although if he does multiple ones he may or may not also use loss, santiago, rollins, etc.) anyway he’s just so fucking good, he has all these videos explaining magical theory in pretty easy to understand ways (maybe going from really simple to like “i understand the basics here and am ready for the technical terms but need an overview” videos you know. 

also he doesn’t just do magic videos, because i said so. also maybe some blogs, and like. because i want to. some fashion/makeup tips. and it’s weirdly endearing because it’s not something you’d expect since he doesn’t wear makeup that often–although a) there are def gifsets of his full makeup looks on tumblr, and b) when he does occasionally decide to wear lipstick or eyeshadow or whatever, most of his fans are like omg yes!! u look cute! also headcanon: twi magnus wears less makeup in general but he still indulges in nail polish. mostly dark/muted colors on his fingers, but bright silly colors on his toes. NAYWAYWYA

also magnus bane is his chosen name because he wanted something cool and wizardy sounding and undeniably masculine. 

also he’s so fucking sweet like look his videos are pretty popular because they’re just handy but he’s not exactly like, a super popular celebrity or anything, you know? but when he does meet fans he’s so incredibly sweet and he does selfies and he’s very appreciative of his followers? he’s so genuine? 

and alec is way more popular–not that he’s not kind and appreciative of his followers. it’s just the thing is, magnus and alec are totally opposite sides of youtube. alec is friendly charismatic completely non-magical youtuber, he plays video games with his sister and like, does vlogs and reaction videos and shit you know. magnus is out here with educational tutorials and excited rambles about magical theory. (i feel like sometimes he accidentally starts doing groundbreaking research for a video and forgets to like, publish it first, and people are like wait what the fuck holy shit) 

but then they fucking meet. 

and a) they’re Instantly smitten. b) this will eventually result in the weirdest collab ever. 

like NO ONE would expect magnus bane, tarot reader and tutorial on magic diy and shit, occasionally does makeup videos and little vlogs and talks about Issues sometimes, to collab with typical hot vlogger gamer man alec lightwood. but it happens, and somehow it’s the best fucking thing ever.

i’m not sure how their channels collide. maybe alec plays a game involving magic and magnus talks about all the ways it’s right/wrong but it ends up just being bantering and giggling and magnus may or may not end up leaning into him on the couch their sitting on and giggling as he makes a stupid joke with the character in the game and immediately everyone’s like…… we ship it

not that i support irl shipping but u know how it goes, everyones like “damn they’re cute” and they’re both openly queer so there’s that. i mean, still not cool, but you know

but really tho they keep doing collabs after that and become actual friends and both start kind of….. doing things for each other’s channel? magnus does a thing like “interview with someone who knows nothing about magic” and we just see a total mundane take on magic and honestly it’s really interesting for both of them, we have more “magnus, who’s an Old Soul and despite having a youtube channel is actually not that great with technology, raphael does all the editing, tries to play video games and kinda fails at it but he gets the hang of some of them”?? he likes puzzle games and mariokart, he does NOT like super smash bros because “THE CHARACTER NEVER DOES WHAT I WANT IT TO ALEXANDER” “you’re just jealous bc i beat ur ass” “you wanna play mariokart again, lightwood?!” 

magnus does a tarot reading for alec, alec does a vlog with him just like “day in the life of alec lol :P” and there’s moments where he just comes up behind magnus like “hey what’s up” and magnus, who’s in rumpled home clothing, sees the camera and chuckles and kinda half heartedly waves it away, and the audience loses their mind at how cute he looks lkdhjgfh

they just become actual good friends, you know? it’s weird bc you wouldn’t think it would work but it really, really does

also on of alec’s fans at some point tries to make a transphobic crack at magnus during a livestream and alec goes OFF on his ass and it’s trending for the next week, the clip goes viral, it’s like “HIMBO GOES OFF ON HATERS FOR BEING TRANSPHOBIC TO HIS FRIEND/POSSIBLE LOVER?” and alec apologizes to magnus for all the attention it brought them but magnus is like “it’s okay, we can use this” and they end up using the hype to do one of those charity livestreams youtubers do and all the proceeds go to something like mermaids or the trevor project, you feel? they’re like “suck it transphobes look at all this money you got trans ppl” khjfgh

ok but eventually they do get together, not on camera, and while it’s slow at first and kind of secret (from the internet, not from friends and family) they’re also not super subtle. they know they’re not, but they’re just sort of like “it’s no one’s business, we’ll announce it when we’re ready”

and honestly tho they love each other so much

also i’ve just decided it’s not uncommon for strong magic-users, even like, level 4 or 5 and up, to have marks, so while his cat eyes are usually glamoured maybe he showed them after a q&a or in a vlog or something? and there are like. lots of gifsets of this, okay, and like, lots of thirst comments. which are like, this weird mix of slightly uncomfortable, really flattering/validating, and embarrassing (in a good and bad way). anyway, magnus has cat eyes in this au, because i fucking said so.

ANYWAY back to their relationship, they’re in love

how did they meet? maybe at a con they bumped into each other, or a totally random fan was like “y’all should do a collab” and everyone was like “what”

or maybe a mutual friend and fellow youtuber, meliorn, who is a nonbinary youtuber who fucking has a sword don’t question me, introduces them? 

idk. but when they meet they hit it off instantly and flirt and end up getting coffee and they don’t date for a while (maybe mutual pining/misunderstandings like “oh he doesn’t like me like that, but it’s okay, we can still be friends :)” or something lkfgjhfgh) but eventually they end up getting together

how? no idea. let me think about it.

idk why but im thinking they’re filming at magnus’s apartment and they’re on his couch and just. late night. they’ve finished up filming but they’re still bantering and maybe playing some video game like mariokart or watching a movie together and just. magnus is leaned all the way into alec, just snuggled up and pressed close against him, alec ends up putting an arm around him, and alec cracks a joke or teases him and magnus sits up a bit to like, poke his chest or flick his nose (you know what i mean? like in an otp person a shifts, still kinda sitting in their lap, and is like [playfully hits shoulder or boops nose or something] and now they’re making eye contact and person b ends up pulling them into a soft kiss???) anyway THEY MAKE EYE CONTACT AND ALEC PULLS HIM INTO A SOFT KISS and alec almost pulls away when he realizes what he’s done but magnus makes this soft little happy noise and leans into him, kissing back, and they just end up kissing for a bit and when they break apart alec is just looking up at him with breathless wonder and magnus is looking down at him with that same soft reverence and alec blurts out something like “you’re magical” and magnus just loses it and he’s giggling and leaning against alec’s chest and alec starts laughing too and magnus can feel the vibrations in his chest and it’s just so nice and pleasant and wonderful and they may or may not end up making out 

they have to talk about it in the morning when they end up falling asleep together in magnus’s bed, cuddled close, but they find, to both of their delights, they both want to date and be in a serious relationship and it’s so fucking good ok 

they go to dinner and the transition from friendship to romance is a little awkward but so worth it, especially when they realize HEY IT’S BOTH YOU DONT STOP BEING FRIENDS WHEN YOU DATE. i mean like, they didn’t not know that, but it’s like, idk how to explain you know they’re kinda like “are we doing this right” and then they’re like “fuck doing it right we can keep cuddling on the couch and giggling and bantering over stupid shit and watching dumb movies and kicking each others asses in video games it doesn’t matter we just also kiss and have dinner more often and sleep together and also we may or may not be in love” 

also they’re That Couple. they’re like straight to the honeymoon, they’re domestic from the first week. magnus is casually doing magic around the house (imagine: he just dyes his hair on a whim and grows it out a little bit and alec is like “i love u no matter how u style ur hair and stuff, and like, ur usual look is so fuckin cute and handsome, but also I Love This.”) but like he’s like (casually summons small ball of light to read book at night) (casually makes alec little protective charms–side note alec def makes him some of these too, but he asks magnus’s old mentor, ragnor, and two of his friends that can do magic, catarina and dot, to enchant it, since he can’t himself, and having magic woven by people who care about him will make it stronger. oh mhyhogfd) and just like. magic used to be something he mostly kept to himself (this def has something to do with his parents–his mom, who he thinks killed herself because of his eyes/magic, his birth dad who’s a powerful sorcerer–level 9, actually, and they think magnus is level 8 for a long time–who was an abusive fuckstick) and then he started doing youtube and it was a kinda show, a gift, something to share, but still not really something he just used openly in front of people he cared about (other than his close friends, since most of them do magic too anyway) but with alec it’s so easy to do that casually?? it’s so easy to just feel comfortable and safe????? yes

anyway they do eventually “come out” as boyfriends, maybe something short and sweet like just. a tweet of magnus sleeping curled up on alec’s chest and he’s like “god i love my boyfriend

they were already not subtle but now that they’re not hiding it they’re so fucking blatantly in love tbh. they do one of those boyfriend tag videos and it’s fucking adorable, at high request they do some couples games kind of videos, like the newlywed game and fuck marry kill (mostly on alec’s channel but magnus has a few, too) and it’s just HIGH QUALITY FUCKING CONTENT

also originally i was just thinking something along the lines of “in canon verse, twi alec is instagram famous/famous on social media and he gets cute tarot boyfriend and is like look at my cute boyfriend and then magnus’s small insta account mostly for his business gets a fuck ton of new followers and alec’s gets a considerable amount too” and now i’m imagining everyone from their respective audiences first thirst-following the other, then actually getting invested 

but really tho they’re the internet’s hottest couple for a while it’s great

for some reason i’m picturing them doing a live tour now, with like, accessible tickets and magnus does magic live on stage and idek what else they’d do tbh but it’d be fun as fuck

anyway this au got away from me

me: i dont have any real coherent ideas

also me: [vomits a 2,500+ word ESSAY] 

#malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #shadowhunters #twi #twi malec #trans magnus #long post #youtube au