#maybe ill even do something tn idk i want to write im just! brain is fried!

[lettersformiah]

9:37am, 7 jul

hey bubs. only two days of placement! lets go. in my head its friday but its not and im so sad about it. i was late again hehehe i always am though bc i have no sense of urgency bc its fucking school. only late by like a halfa (or technically an hour if you count acg) but yeah i woke up and was like non and then woke up at like 8:15? but yeah. got the 9:25 bus and the worker people who do the stop and go signs had to stop them so i could cross the road hehehe. they were very very nice. the construction, i learnt, is on a power line. dont know what happened there but hopefully it gets fixed soon. had glimpse of us stuck in ym head this morning so ive just been listening to it on repeat. i keep having to sign in at the office so mrs copley doesnt come for me about being truant hehe but how many times can i go there in a week and press the silly buttons about missing my bus or family or sleeping in. its literally a game to me to just fucking press whatever button i see first. getting out of french next period! or at least half of it because im gonna hang out with hannah. none of my friends know im here but theyve also stopped texting me asking where i am so im glad they are just like eh she will get here when she gets here. i dont know what to say to hannah. what do i talk about. i feel like i cant be as open with her as id liek and i know thats so detrimental but like,, ive never been good at being 100% honest with my counselors and stuff so! idk. maybe i just talk about internals and your parents and you obvs and then?? idk job stuff and my dad? and my sister. i dont know i guess i have a lot to say just as an update to my life. also! sorry for falling asleep last night bubba, i know you werent home and its a bit of a mb. its very very sweet of you to stay on call though bubba. makes me so happy :*] even tho rn joji is making me so sad bro like. :'[ oh! geo is actually due first week term 2 ^^ im happy about that bc then i can do it while i wait around for u to be done with uni. but yeah! the reliever :l told me that she wants as much as she can get from us tomorrow but to have all of it done over the holidays. which is nice for me bc then i can do the excellence stuff and get everything done. im so glad. i love mrs haggart sm hehehe shes a banging teacher fr and i hope i get her next year. bio will um be something. maybe he will say just to get it done by tomorrow which i can do all of it tn. and i can write my english! im so fucking happy with it. like smh and my writing isnt amazing by any means, but i found a nice system and sparknotes is like helping me so much so i owe my grade to them for deadass just giving me quotes and themes. i love the internet bro. imagine if i had to do it all from my own fucking brain. id be so pressed. but yeah! i dont know what the last two texts are gonna be but ill just search around sparknotes for some stuff and just randomly search novels ive read in my life. maybe i will actually do the maze runner, surely its on there yk? my nose is all sniffly bubba >:( the outside is pretty chilly and geo is warm as. the temperature difference being a bitch to my poor poor nose. so dog hehe but yeah! idk bubba. i love you! geo will be over in a second so this was just a teeny update on my morning and all that. i love you sm and thank u for everything. mwahmwhamwahwmah

talk soon

-mads<3

#letters

[angelthingirl333]

i camt be by myself anymore i dont know how i cant stop crying i cry very loud

i have a 20 in my bank and i cant find my bank card and thats the only other thing tht could possibly calm me down at all besides the one im crying over to begin with

but theyrw not here and im all alone and i dont have anyone and i dont know if thwyre coming back

they always disappear on me but this time they said nothing and its 3:34am and i just hope theyre out alone tn doing something and will be back by morning maybe i can last tht long only if i could sleep but idk if i can i have a job wash i mighr do it but then im not gonna sleep again for sure and it will be worse tmrw or maybe worse now

i have a down wash i been using all night if i dont get a good deal on diz im prolly not gonna feel my shot for long or maybe not even at all

i dont know what im gonna do if i wake up and its not to them just getting back to our home

i dont even want to fight

if im not able to get drugs tn im screwed tmrw morning

fuck i better find my fucking bank card

anyways ofcourse by the time im done scream crying for now and writing this post i think i hear someone in the woods but idk

it better be or idk maybe i gotta screamcry again ok bye i try to do anothwr smash hopefully not job bc w and tht bitch dont get along well

ps i dont think anyone likes me at all sometimes

i remember the first time thwy left me and i was on jib in a forest by the river and all i could do was cry and hallucinate them as if they were one n then one of the many other trees or things around me for hours it was the worst

im always all alone without them

i feel like i have no friends

bc everyone out here is their friend first i just feel like their girlfriend n thts my name,, the girlfriend

and no one came to the place so idk if theyre here or went to our neighbours but they’re not even home and idk if they moved our tent i dont even remember if our other tent was there before when we left earlier idk i hate my brain and myself

but at least i can sing and make art

maybe ill post some of my art bc i tried to redraw some of the art i have memory of tht i lost bc i put it all in one book like a scrap book of all my art in a year bc i never rlly drew before n i fuckin lost it all

i prolly have pics of aum of it somewherw i hope fu kkk ));

but the ones i drew recently to try to recreate the originals r like so close to the first ones i drew and they might b better? or at least just havent been rained on and gotten wet and moldy liek multiple times aka too many times to count thanks to winter and rain and condensation and slushy ugly muddy spring :)))

anyways ily if theres anyone here😫🥺😭💕💕

#me #art #angelgirl #angelthingirl #drug warning #drugs mention #babyboy #Spotify