#okay GOODNIGHTGOODNIGHT

[warmthpdf]

if i don’t write down all my thoughts about surviving this summer sometime soon i think i will explode !

#'surviving' to begin with feels like such a strong word to apply to this summer but survival is SO intensely woven into how i've been living #how ive been living these past few months has been based around just surviving the next hour the next day the next week #and not being sure if i was able to do that or if doing that was worth it #for the first time in years i didnt wanna wake up. but for the first time in years i also wanted to live authentically and unabashedly #theres a lot i want to say about that? probably not all of it on tumblr. i feel like im already sharing way too much #but my point is that despite nothing life altering or world shattering or something that could be 'big trauma' this was something i survived #and i want to feel a little proud of that #and i think to be proud of that i have to put that into words and really really look at it as if this was someone else #to feel validated in my own survival i have to ?? view it as if its someone else. bc i think im the one exception to deserving to heal ig #but it helps to put things in perspective #im rly holding back a lot of feelings rn i think and i need an outlettttt #gonna journal tomorrow night i think #sleepover on monday. a lot of feelings about that :') first day back at college on wednesday. seeing the big group of friends on friday #things are happening and im trying to hold my life in my hands again and say its enough to keep living for #mine #thats all ! its 4am nini #sorry my tags are so. like this lmaooooo i forget other people might actually SEE what i post #im not a writer by any means but ppl on my uquiz have said my writing is very nice :') so thats been encouraging me to ramble more i think #okay GOODNIGHTGOODNIGHT

[alliluyevas]

@goodnightgoodnight asked: Stannis, Sansa, and Sandor

STANNIS

First impression: okay so the first chapter of A Clash Of Kings was the first part of ASOIAF that I read, it was a friend’s copy that she was reading and I picked it up when she didn’t have it and I just got sucked into it…the prologue with Cressen and Mel and Davos and the relationship between the Baratheon brothers and STANNIS everything about Stannis as a character and the whole situation was incredibly compelling to me. So I finished that chapter which was like a whole saga in of itself and then my friend wanted her book back and about a year later I started watching the show and then I read the books and the rest is history.

Impression now: my grumpy and melancholic son and still the best king Westeros has available

Favorite moment: honestly like any moment when he shows emotional vulnerability I instantly start crying…when he’s angsting over Renly giving him a peach…

Idea for a story: any Stannis + Shireen interaction

Unpopular opinion: Stannis is the best option for king and a deserving person and deeply sympathetic character

Favorite relationship: Stannis and his brothers or Stannis and Davos depending on what sort of pain I’m looking for…bittersweet heavy on the bitter or the sweet

Favorite headcanon: autistic Stannis ftw (and autistic     Shireen!!)

SANSA

 First impression: she’s so pretty lmao…and then instantly feeling for her as a Vulnerable And Traumatized Girl

Impression now: my love…the most wonderful…also honestly if I had to place a bet she’s the character I’d bet money on surviving the series I just KNOW thematically and spiritually that she will

Favorite moment: when she comforts the other women during the siege of Kings’ Landing honestly like even though she’s so tired and scared she PULLS IT TOGETHER TO HELP EVERYONE ELSE SHE IS TRULY THE BEST…an icon

Idea for a story: Sansa and Sandor and Jaime and Brienne all interacting…my faves…and so much potential

Unpopular opinion: Sansa is wonderful and deserves all the good things

Favorite relationship: hehe SanSan

Favorite headcanon: Sansa is also bi tbh

SANDOR

First impression: I honestly didn’t think much of him until his Horrible Childhood Trauma Backstory and his relationship with Sansa started to develop and then I mcfreaking lost it

Impression now: my large and emotional son, he’s trying his best

Favorite moment: when he tells Sansa about what Gregor did to him and he opens up to her and she shows compassion and love to him even though he scared her previously…I die one thousand times…also on a side note FUCK the show for giving Sandor’s Traumatic Background Reveal to Littlefinger it cheapened it SO much WHY would y’all not let him tell his own story it was such a powerful moment between him and Sansa

Idea for a story: anything with teenage immediately post-rebellion Jaime and Sandor interacting

 Unpopular opinion: I think it’s kind of disrespectful for people (in the fandom) to call him “The Hound” all the time like…it’s not as bad as when people call Tyrion the Imp but it’s still kind of a pet peeve…it’s like, totally disregarding the impact of his story and that he has a name and isn’t an animal (even though he loves animals). Also I feel like people give him a lot of shit for saying that Bran would be better off dead after his accident and I think that’s coming from internalized ableism and self-loathing more than anything, like people hold him and Jaime almost equally accountable for saying that and their context is completely different.

Favorite relationship: Take A Wild Guess

Favorite headcanon: Sandor has never been kissed