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starshine-selfships · 3 years

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1, 10, 11, and 12 for the ask game ? 😺🙏💟

Hi hi hi!! You're getting long answers to these bc any excuse to talk about this man makes me go crazy stupid 🙌🙌🙌💕

1) What's a Hot Take you have about your f/o?

HE👏IS👏NEURODIVERGENT!! I'm specifically talking adhd, but he checks a lot of boxes for something more ambiguous too. I'm actually rewriting my adhd sh.aiapouf post and I'm gonna put it here too, but the cut time version IS: noticeable hyperfixations/special interests in music and the monarchy, practically no empathy + has difficulty understanding the emotions of others, fast thinking + thinks a LOT, almost weirdly analytical + book smart with little to no interpersonal skills, extreme emotions all over the board, like there's a LOT here and it explains like 80% of why he's Like That 😤

10) How did you feel when you realized "oh of course I had to like That Character"?

Okay I have a lot to say on this one djnfkffk please bear with me as I write a whole novel

✌U_U ✌

Honestly,, , I wasn't happy LMAOOO, around the time I watched the anime for the first time i was actually still pretty into j.jba and unfortunately was really into dio U_U

I was fascinated by pouf as soon as I saw him in the opening, lots of neat ant designs and then this butterfly man?? I need to know everything about him 👀 His intro with the rainbows in the wings, the fairy chimes, the solo violin, all had me like 👁👁 Sir I Am Going To Study You Like The Insect You Are, and then I saw him actually play the violin and was sold lmao. He was funny as far as comic relief went and then? The giant improv ballet breakdown and antagonistic turn drew me in further and then I was invested in a no going back sorta way as soon as he went chibi for the first time, just watching the chaos of the entire scene with this ridiculous huge grin dhjdkxkf every single thing he did was in the extremes and it was like watching a train de-rail in real time, I saw him face down in the dirt at the end of the arc and didn't even feel anything, he was just so WILD

So I finish h.xh not too long after that and texted a friend and was like hmmm. I need to watch j.jba to return to my roots and also to forget that I think I might've accidentally given myself a lil crush on the butterfly man 😳 idk if that return ever happened but I DO remember being frustrated with how pretty he is,, I didn't really wanna shift hyperfixations at the time and also didn't know if it was attraction or gender envy bc. what I would give to simultaneously look so fem and so masc 👁 either way it was a 3 month struggle of "oh no oh my god I wanna kiss a bug so bad?? 😞" and then I caved at midnight in a denny's and was like okay. fine. I'm gay for a bug, I really really like him but *i* don't have to like that 😤

I did, in fact, proceed to like it, enough to make an entire separate blog for him. It was a slow progression of "I mean, I'd share a ballroom dance with him, like a waltz maybe", "hmm okay he's funny but whatever", "oh uh. he uh. I mean he's neat, a lot of people didn't like him but I just think he's an interesting character 😳" and. and then I finally caved and I never stopped talking sjdkfkf though to be fair, I was already talking about him a LOT on my main, I just decided that maybe it would be nice to have a space to just. contain 90% of my poufposting LMAOOO

Final note on this, but I think what really got me is how many characters are in this series and yet I gravitated towards the one no one could stand 😞✌ though to be fair the hatred for him has definitely gone down compared to what I can remember from a few years ago; absolutely does not change the fact that He Is The Way He Is, but I saw the war crimes, malice, potentially treason, and I won't name it but it's by far the most uncomfortable thing to sit through in the arc, I saw ALL of that and still went hmmmm yes I want that one U_U true love huh

11) Do you think it's better to have copious amounts of content for your f/o, even with the risk of finding a lot of ship art, or better to have a lot less?

The art situation with him is strange bc there's a decent enough to be notable amount of art of him captioned with some variation of "I hated him but he had a really cool character design", but it's still content. Surprisingly, I actually don't track the tag for him but take a look at it anyways almost every day and there's maybe one new thing there like once a week, minimal content bc so many people just didn't like him, which is fair!! But also, he was definitely there as a prominent character, I'd just like to see more of him U_U I would put more art here but I'm too conscious of the art ops seeing my bs over here jdkdkfkk

There actually are a handful of ship art drawings of him, which astounds me bc this man wasn't there to make friends, not even with his own siblings :/, but the errant art of him with morel or kite is honestly pretty cute, please just let this man be happy, I love to see him smile 🥺

12) Aren't you tired of being nice? This is an excuse to rant.

He wasn't the worst guard!! All three had reasons for doing what they did and arguably, pouf's motives were the most complex. Yes he did some pretty awful things, but he considered them to be the right thing to do without a doubt in his mind, all his actions were selfish in that they were based off his own feelings, but he did things ultimately for the king, so his actions also had an edge of selflessness to them as well. He was just. so much more than annoying and while his character development wasn't positive, it was still some pretty astounding growth; as an antagonist, he's also fairly plausible 👀 sometimes people just are manipulative, sometimes feelings do get the better of you, pouf just has all those factors amped up to 11 at all times so they're magnified. I have. a lot of thoughts on him, he interests me very much 😞👀🤔👀

#i am saying so much!! he is very meaningful to me!!#he resonates with me on a weirdly intimate level and while i still don't totally know how to take that #i suppose it's pretty neat nonetheless; i have MANY thoughts about him and i love being able to share them lmao #ty for the ask!!!! ❤💕#lovebug #asks

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 4 years

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tuesday again

heartaches by the number AND troubles by the score this week, i have vague plans for an All Friend Recs edition but don’t have my shit together enough for that this week. so,

reading bouncing off many things. this Autostraddle article about being queer in Boston is clicking with me in a specific way. unfortunately i don’t have the words to articulate that right now, but it is real weird to be gay in this state. i go to umass, which is in central mass, but i’ve spent enough time in Boston to know i don’t want to live there.

listening Phenom, Thao and the Get Down Stay Down. this is a music video entirely contained & choreographed within a zoom call. these three lines, mwah, delicious

First of the secondary class class class You know I don't trust you what's the catch catch catch Don't you fucking touch me I will gnash gnash gash

youtube

watching the tv series Taboo, on Hulu. i cannot with any sort of good conscience recommend this to anyone bc it is a hot fuckin mess. it’s a lot, and almost always in a bad way. however, tom hardy is at his feral best and seems like he had a tremendous amount of fun with it. i like a lot of things that are objectively garbage but i don’t often talk about em in these posts bc i am generally talking with some depth about my experience with a piece of media, and there isn’t a lot to talk about here. it isn’t very good, i’m just thirsty on main for tom hardy and i don’t have the decision making capabilities to find another tv show i can only sort of pay attention to while i knit.

playing i’m reaching the end of my time with Fallout 4, i think. i have two hundred and twenty seven hours in it on steam, with a save time sitting somewhere around two hundred ten bc the fuckin thing crashes so often. something interesting and bad has happened where it takes a minute and a half to load a transition between spaces/fast travel, and i have no mods and haven’t fucked with console commands except to remove a boat from where i wanted to put a water purifier, and that doesn’t....seem like it would be related to this problem but who the fuck knows.

i have made very little progress in the actual main storyline bc i don’t find it all that interesting. i will probably go back and finish the Far Harbor dlc, and all i’ve got to do is commit some war crimes in Nuka-Cola World to finish that one up, but i don’t....care any more. this may be the depression? not sure. many of the Fallout games commit the same sins (none of em has a good portrayal of disability/mental health, named characters who are not white are few and far between, the worldbuilding is shaky at best) but this is the one with the worst writing i think.

making sock. ripped out the heel on this one three times maybe i’ll get it right this time if i put on a podcast and just Focus.

#tuesday again no problem #tuesday again

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cheekbites-moved · 6 years

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ok so i watched love simon for the first time last night & i was too tired to make a ‘final thoughts’ post then, so here it is now! lol

obviously this is gonna be long as hell so im putting it under a read more for ur convenience lmfao

im actually gonna start with what i didnt like bc it was just one thing.

obviously, if uve seen the movie (as many ppl hated this too), or read my liveblogging posts, u know what it is lol

ill be honest, as a gay person, im incredibly biased towards simon. ill admit that. that being said, how his friends treated him after he got outed was fucking disgusting.

here’s the thing: the actions simon did that his friends got upset over were motivated by the threat of him being outed. now, if this movie was just some fluffy, fantastical movie, the threat would just be ppl knowing he’s gay and that’s it. no repercussions, just ppl gaining the knowledge that he’s not straight. not that big a deal.

however, since this movie tries its best to be accurate and realistic to things, it’s not that simple in the movie, and it’s not the simple in real life.

the risk of being outed is not just ‘ppl knowing ur gay’ and that’s it.

the risk of being outed involves the risk of getting bullied (which does happen in the movie, twice. once to ethan on screen, once to simon after he comes out.), getting abandoned by ur friends (which also does happen in the movie), getting expelled from school or fired from ur job if either of them find out & are lgbtphobic, getting kicked out of ur house if ur parents/whoever u live w find out & theyre lgbtphobic, and, at worst, it can come with the risk of getting beaten or even killed.

and no, this isnt me blowing this up to be more serious than it should be. bc unfortunately, in the world we live in, these things can happen as a result of someone being lgbt, whether they came out themselves or were outed by someone else.

the worst thing simon did was hurt his friends’ feelings a bit.

he didnt notice leah’s feelings for him (which. why would he? he’s not interested in her, or any girl for that matter, so obviously he’s not looking for the signs of interest. why would he notice that, and why was it his responsibility to know anyway??). he tried to set nick up with her because he genuinely thought she had feelings for nick, and that’s the main reason why he didn’t realize that she liked him.

yes, part of the motive was trying to get nick out the way so he could set abby up with martin, but ffs. let me reiterate that his life, and potential future, were on the line. having the possibility of all the aforementioned things potentially happening to him should make his actions at least understandable.

like falling for someone that doesnt like u back bc theyre not attracted to ur gender (which like.. hello. gay ppl fucking experience that shit all the time too & we have to learn to deal w it.), or being put in a game of matchmaker bc ur friend was trying to save their own fucking life is rly not that big a deal compared to said friend’s situation of trying to save their own fucking life.

one situation hurts, but can eventually be healed from (which clearly they do in the movie since abby and nick got together anyway in spite of simon’s actions, and leah’s fine). the other situation has the chance of resulting in a fucking future/life being ruined or taken. i think that one is much more fucking important.

all in all, i just wish they wouldve fucking apologized. bc they screamed at him after he got outed.

abby saw how fucking terrified he was when he came out to her, but she’s not gonna have a single ounce of sympathy when he was outed to the entire school against his will?? like what the fuck!

also wish they wouldve stood up for him when he got bullied. they just sat there with guilty expressions, but none of them did anything. it was really rough to watch.

as much as all this seriously pissed me off, though, especially as a person who has been outed against my will so all of simon’s heartache as a result rly resonated with me..

i appreciate that they put that shit in.

bc u know what unfortunately that is how cishet ppl react sometimes. guilting u for being lgbt, guilting u for not coming out to them despite knowing how scary it can be, etc etc etc.

and getting apologizes from cishet ppl for that kinda shit is rare. so, as much as i was annoyed that they didnt apologize, that is unfortunately realistic. as much as i wish they wouldve stood up for him, that was also unfortunately realistic. so im still glad it’s in there even if it did piss me off.

simon’s speech to martin was nice at least, and i hope that it taught some cishet ppl that have outed ppl, or threatened to out ppl, or wanted to out ppl, why u just dont fucking do that shit.

woo now that that’s outta my system lmfao onto all the good stuff! in bullet list form bc theres a l o t lmfao

the soundtrack ESP for the emotional moments wOw

‘i wanna dance with somebody’ gay musical addition

simon’s subtle annoyed looks whenever straight nonsense™ happens

simon’s terrible attempts at being straight

simon’s extremely subtle, but still noticeable if ur lgbt, panic whenever the potential chance of him being outed/discovered arises

the dog

simon’s parents’ speeches to him after he comes out to them

seriously as gay, nb person w lgbtphobic parents that shit meant a lot to hear.

the fact that this is not only a mainstream lgbt rom-com, but also a mainstream movie abt a gay kid learning to love himself and be confident with himself and his sexuality

simon’s journey to being able to proudly proclaim that he’s gay.

the speech he has near the end is so fucking powerful bc we see him struggle throughout the movie to say it.

first he cant say it at all, then he can only say it quietly, but by the end of the movie, he’s proclaiming to the entire school, loud and proud, that yes. he is gay. and he’s not going to feel wrong for that anymore.

i feel like that entire journey is one that can really resonate with a lot of ppl, including myself. so im so fucking happy that this movie included that progression, and ended it with him having such an exuberant amount of confidence. it was honestly really beautiful, and im glad i got to witness it.

simon practicing pickup lines in the mirror

“hey barack its me jacques”

abby trying to teach simon how to flirt

simon googling “how to dress like a gay guy”

simon not having martin’s bullshit and telling him off for how fucked up blackmailing him was from the start, but especially his speech about how important/personal coming out is to ppl and how shitty it was that he took that away from him

MRS ALBRIGHT IN GENERAL BUT ESPECIALLY HER ICONICALLY STICKING UP FOR SIMON IN THE CAFETERIA I STAN HER SO HARD!!

ethan in general, but especially his speech to simon in the office, and super especially the line “one gay’s a snnooze, two’s a hilarious hate crime”

like i seriously appreciate how real this movie is. and it doesnt have lines like this, or plots like the blackmailing/outing just for drama.

it’s to show that this is how being lgbt can be sometimes, this shit rly happens. and i just rly appreciated seeing all that in a way that didnt even try to pull any punches. it was so clear they seriously cared abt making this an accurate movie, and that meant a lot

GETTING TO SEE TWO BOYS KISSING ON SCREEN MULTIPLE TIMES, AND NOT JUST THAT, BUT GETTING TO SEE THEM GET A HAPPY ENDING!!!!!

i seriously cried for like 20 minutes starting from when bram showed up at the ferris wheel to well after the credits had ended.

i cannot even begin to express how fucking incredible it was to get to see two boys kissing, getting cheered on, and getting to be happy.

especially in the scene where simon picks up everyone, and leah moves so bram can get in the front seat and he kisses simon when he gets in. IT WAS SO SWEET.. AND BEAUTIFUL I LOVED/APPRECIATED IT SO MUCH IT MEANT SOOOO FUCKING MUCH TO ME GOSH

my thoughts of the movie can be boiled down to this: im so fucking happy this movie exists.

im so fucking happy that a movie abt a gay kid learning to be confident in his sexuality, falling in love and getting to have a happy ending with his boyfriend exists.

ive never cried more at a movie than i did at this movie, and ive especially never cried harder out of sheer happiness for a movie.

knowing that this movie was in theaters, and that gay kids/teens have a movie that lets them know early on that not only is gonna be ok, but they do have a chance at a happy ending, and they deserve it, was so goddamn amazing.

this movie is so, so important. and im so happy that it, and the book its based off of, exist.

and it’s a prime example of why representation matters so much. it was so fucking amazing to see myself, as a gay person, represented so well, so thoughtfully, so respectfully.

i just... i love this movie so much. and im so glad it exists. and im so happy i finally got to see it.

i hope it inspires more movies/stories like it to be made.

i hope that it results in lgbt stories being happy, uplifting stories.

i hope that it results in lgbt characters getting to be the main characters.

i hope it results in coming out stories being about the lgbt characters, and not how them coming out affects the cishet characters around them.

and i hope it results in less tragic endings for lgbt characters, and more happy endings for lgbt characters.

for a long time, a future where we get the stories just mentioned has seemed bleak. but this movie changed that. and im excited for the road i hope it’s started us on.

#long post//#text heavy//#gotta fight the urge to rewatch it a million times now tbh tktjrkjrtj #potentially new fav movie? or at least fav live action movie #aaa im just. i love!! sm!!! bless...#luna watches love simon #homophobia mention//

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