#secret forbidden jirving bonus lore | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

irvingcoded · 10 months

Photo

to stop it or to touch it... (redone as all text instead 🙏)

this makes their "first & last" scenes together direct inverses to each other bc ON-SCREEN their 1st scene together is jirv walking in on hickey&gibson, & chronologically obviously the murder is their "last" moment (making the flashback we get afterward both their 1st "moment" together AND also chronologically their last scene).

but w/ this in mind it's also an inverse bc we're seeing irving finally face his fears: hickey, literally; & temptation / gay desire, subtextually. the script identifies the moment jirv confronts hickey abt "abusing" gibson as "probably the bravest thing he's ever done" (!) which we will translate here as: morally he wants to do the right thing, bc 1) well he's not a BAD person, but also 2) he sees it as his moral xtian spiritual duty now to follow it through since gibson's come to him abt it directly, VS he does not LITERALLY want to address "what happened" or have to actually confront the situation head-on at all bc hickey scawes him 🥺 & not just as self-recognition thru the other (derogatory) anymore, where hickey stands for someone who can / will unapologetically act on his desires, & basically go thru life happily and godlessly comfortable w/ who he is (we love irony <3) etc etc that whole xtian thing abt pride being one of the worst sins; but now also jirv better understands the SEVERITY!! of hickey's wickedness too, in that not ONLY does he seem kinda lazy & (vaguely) manipulative / cunning & etc etc but now jirv's ALSO just been given reason to believe hickey's abusive & predatory sexually as well as morally, gibson was DEVIOUSLY SEDUCED (honest mistake! it could happen to anyone!!) and has now allegedly been threatened / blackmailed into it ever since

( aka i don't think it's rly a stretch to say jirv is projecting his own fears onto gibson: the obvious worst case scenario of what COULD happen (even to him!!!!!) were he ever to act on Those Temptations™ + in addition to gibson's testimony of abuse extortion etc basically just a situation where he is innocent PLUS also he seems repentant 🥺🥺 so yes ofc jirv will empathize w/ that narrative... yes sodomy is always wrong BUT since it's MORE hickey's fault for seducing & taking advantage of him can gibson truly be blamed or held accountable here for any of it... plus he's sorry... so it's still not ok, but. it's ok. like it's not but yes it is... )

BUT I DIGRESS back to the bravest thing jirv's ever done: so defined here as telling hickey to cut that out and go get a real hobby (whew, done!) but NOT actually intervening (even tho he interrupted) at the time of discovery; vs "RUNNING UP BOTH TO STOP IT AND TO TOUCH IT" which ...... ok HEAR ME OUT (& if it pleases the court your honor) SHOULD also be translated as both him facing his fear of hickey et al (perhaps emboldened by the ALMOST hero moment situation of it all) AND metaphorically, he's facing his fear of... ahem, just finally taking the risk and going for it (nonsexual) (but also absolutely sexual)

which does actually sort of bring things full circle for them on both levels (textual vs unspoken / subtextual) bc if we take the "site of what is potentially fucking" of it all to its logical conclusion, "stopping it" is gonna be his default, regular brain level reaction, it's the This Seems Kinda Bad I'm Gonna Be So Brave And Actually Get Involved This Time, so then "touching it" becomes...... well it's sort of a tactic acknowledgement, right? of this whole unspoken half of the dynamic, aka if we DO interpret the murder-by-stabbing as a metaphor for penetration / fucking (which i mean... ‘tis) then we must consider and accept the implications of what ELSE irving is finally acknowledging to himself more than even hickey here, however still unspoken and probably mostly unintentional; it's not actually a yes, because well. a murder metaphor doesn't rly track for "yes," but at this moment (probably) more like "maybe" or at least "not a no." with hickey's answer seeming to be... on one hand: i do see you, and i'm even going to do you a final kindness by giving you what you want :) (on the text level meaning kind of a quick, "heroic" death at least) but he’s giving threat and malice too w/ the covered mouth, the distorted, corrupted singing, the degradation (via post-mortem mutilation) with literal emasculation... etc etc i mean this part is pretty straightforward.

& i think there's for sure a deliberate lack of closure here, because hickey wants irving to die confused, he's choosing chaos by murdering him w/out answering any of the questions irving (or anyone) might have abt the endgame here, about WHY, hello??? & in doing so refusing to clearly answer the unspoken "what are we" (altho ofc his actions are answer enough!)

anyway, in conclusion... we’ve known 💖 and why did he act it this way 💖💖

#🍓#john irving #the terror #the terror amc #A Post About The Terror #secret forbidden jirving bonus lore #jirv posting #hickving #feeling normal having SUCH a normal one today hbu #edited to be slightly less chaotic i think (hope)#also revised here n there to be more coherent than i originally was at 3am 🤪

54 notes · View notes