#the English major realisation only happened today and I am incredibly embarassed about it

[keekry]

Crushes I have had, but never really talked about.

1. This waitress in a Korean desert shop. BTS was playing in the background, I was like 14 and newly inducted into rainbow antics, and she was really, really pretty

2. A boy I would see in the lift every morning. I was maybe 10? He played the cello I think, and was very polite.

3. Three girls in the same friend group, one after the other. This was extremely embarrassing on multiple counts for different reasons each time. I just had lunch with two of them after maybe 6 years and we get along like a house on fire. I think I have a thing for English majors.

4. A very cute boy I met, once again, in a lift. He was also an English major. (I cover my face) He told me the horrible cat my friend had drawn on my arm was cute and I was kind of smitten with his voice. I never saw him again but I think about him sometimes. Nice hands.

5. Shiro, from Voltron. Please do not comment on this.

6. My gay awakening! I almost never talk about this, because she reacted pretty badly when she found out, and homophobia was alive and well in my high school, but she was cool as fuck. Got me into writing and drawing so you can blame her for my 3AM thoughts.

(I say reacted badly but it wasn’t hostile or anything. My friend group was just very misinformed.)

7. A guy who came up to me after I gave my thesis presentation, shy as fuck and adorably charmed by my (quite intense) gesticulations about queer retellings of folklore. I confess I didn’t really have a crush on him but I do think of him fondly. Baby boy. Deep deep voiced baby boy.

#I will regret this in the morning #maybe #anyway enjoy the lore #I love making lists #the English major realisation only happened today and I am incredibly embarassed about it #staying far far away from the English department #(we have class on the same floor😔) #writing #personal