#the art is gonna give me intrusive thoughts about cannibalism | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cruelonlytobekindarchived · 7 years

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A META ON CANNIBALISM + ALANA BECAUSE I DON’T TALK ABOUT IT ENOUGH HAVEN’T TALKED ABOUT IT IN A META EXERCISE

In a fantastically backwards coping mechanism, Alana’s frequent obsessive thought process revolves around cannibalism/can get pretty dark by way of cannibalism along the lines of intimacy and the way she thinks about it/can get pretty grotesque when linked with her anger or negative emotions.

Alana spent thirteen years indirectly consuming human flesh. And while it wasn’t on a steady constancy because I refuse to subscribe to the bullshit NBC canon that he perpetually feeds everyone/eats human being because otherwise he would have a severe degenerative brain disease and so would she, it was regularly enough, as she discovers after he’s exposed for it. Thirteen years of finding out you ate people is enough to scar you mentally in a phenomenally artful underbelly of a way that’s a little worse than finding out you were eating fish sticks when you thought you were eating chicken fingers as a child.

Namely, in an attempt to cope, Alana’s brain entirely absorbed the mentality of the power dynamic cannibalism represents. It’s a dominant act, cannibalization-- a way of proving superiority over the prey. And since Alana’s entire agency was completely subverted by being gaslighted, manipulated, probably psychotropically drugged, and overall abused, it would only make sense that her brain scrambled to grab power from her abuser in exactly the way he had considered powerful.

I’m not saying she’d fucking eat Hannibal Lecter, but I am saying she’d fucking eat Hannibal Lecter.

Intimacy, too, is a power act. Something obsessively dwelt on for her, something always thought about. Sex can’t be something she considers safe when for thirteen years in a casual on and off--

(I’m interrupting myself in this meta to remind you all that this & this give me some really uncomfortable dubcon vibes I didn’t notice but shout-out to @mxdam for making me realize this line and drawing my NOW OBSESSIVE ATTENTION TO IT)

--she then discovered that sex had been a manipulative act. Ergo, all sex after Hannibal, even if only on a physiological level, is an act of dominance or a power-play. Unconsciously, primal instincts always lead into more primal instincts for her, and in direct route to cannibalism as an act of dominance, this means that sex sometimes blurs with the concept. This is much more prominent in her male than her female or nonbinary sexual relationships, as Alana correlates masculinity with dominance unconsciously due to prior negative experiences and thanks a lot, Hannibal.

This means, sometimes, sex is gonna be a little wobbly where intrusive thoughts are concerned, and she’s gonna think about eating you, probably, even if only for a hot second.

(Free indirect discourse is kind of drilled into my writing inherently. For gross Easter eggs on this in a sexual connotation please see here, where @vcspertiilio probably assumes Bruce Wayne wouldn’t ever have someone thinking about literally eating him in bed.)

She much prefers (she does laugh about what a joke her life is that she can say ‘prefers’ when it comes to intrusive thoughts about cannibalism) the ones spurred by negativity. It can be a flash of something out of anger, or a flicker of something out of jealousy or brief possessiveness. To eat someone is to intake or ingest them. They become intrinsically YOURS, they can be no one else’s. So sometimes, when it gets really violent or bad in her thought process--

YOU GUESSED IT, SHE’S GONNA THINK ABOUT EATING YOU.

She is completely aware of how wrong this is and how disturbed it is, but she’s completely aware of it and would NEVER act on it. In fact, she should probably tell someone about it FOR FUCK’S SAKE, but she’s so ashamed and so afraid of how her thoughts have changed--

If you can get it out of her, honestly, I’ll give you one of my kidneys.

(BONUS: THE ONE WHERE ALANA’S AN HONEST BUT SICK FUCK)

#cannibalism /#rape mention /#LANAFACT.#[kat where have you been? you say #you have been so inactive for so many days #well friends i reply #i have a ton of grad school work but instead i'm writing about cannibalism.]

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