#they'll all go up on ao3 when i feel like im done

[imsodishy]

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It gets worse after the move. Partly because he is actually angry more than he ever was before, but he’s also exhausted and stressed all the time. He's been at the end of his rope for weeks on end by the time they actually leave California in the rear view, and he doesn’t see that situation improving any time soon. 

First day at school he sticks with silence as much as he can manage. It’s mysterious and aloof, and it works well enough in podunk Hawkins, Indiana that bottom feeders swarm to him. He feeds them canned smiles and cheesy winks, over chewed pabulum about what California is like, and they gobble it up happily like it’s a banquet feast. In return they fill up all the silence with gossip he doesn’t care about while he tries to find his fucking footing. 

He literally says nothing to Harrington at the Halloween party. He’s heard all about King Steve. More than enough to run some lines in preparation for this exact moment. He gets one look at that face though and knows he’s way too drunk to risk saying anything, even with the preparation. Too risky. No idea what he'll say or what it'll sound like under the influence of cheap beer and those Bambi eyes. 

Of course Harrington also stands there with nothing to say, which does undeniably make it weirder. Tommy H. at least does the one thing he's good for, which is running his fucking mouth. 

All in all Billy is grateful that it doesn’t last long. Harrington’s prissy little girlfriend is in a snit and he runs off to handle her. Billy gets too drunk to bother tracking that shit, but, apparently it doesn’t go well because the school is a buzz the next day. King Steve got the brush off sounds like. 

Now, in gym class, Harrington’s playing like shit two days running, which is annoying. Billy wants to play, and Harrington probably could if he wasn't flopping around like puppet with no strings on him. He needs direction on the court, but the Coach here is asleep at the wheel, just keeps shouting, "Hustle!" at seemingly random intervals. Also annoying. 

Billy talks shit on the court, because that’s what you’re supposed to do. But Harrington won’t pick up his end of the stick. 

Finally he can't take it anymore. After he trips Harrington up, yet again, Billy plants himself over him, offers a hand but doesn't pull him up just yet. 

"You were moving your feet," he says, "Plant them next time. Draw a charge." 

Billy hears it. Before Harrington's brow even has a chance to furrow, Billy can hear himself; he doesn’t sound helpful, he doesn't sound friendly. Missed the mark by a mile. He wasn't planning on saying anything, it was a spur of the moment thing, he didn't have a chance to prep the line, he’s still a little hungover, and Indiana is the fucking pits. So it's absolutely no surprise that Billy sounds mean. 

No surprise to Billy anyway. Steve on the other hand looks perplexed. 

Billy, obviously, panics, and shoves Harrington back down. Which definitely doesn’t help at all. 

Should have kept his fucking mouth shut. 

He tries to do some damage control in the shower, to mixed results he would say. Tommy keeps chirping, which isn’t helping Billy's frustration levels at all. Still, words of encouragement after a girl blows you off, that should be easy. He doesn’t nail it though, not if Harrington’s glare is anything to go off of. Fuck know’s why Billy turns off his shower. Just a weird impulse he couldn’t stamp down. 

Billy spends the night obsessing over it all. Playing back the scenes until the film burns in his brain. 

#there's a part 3 in the works too??? who am i? #they'll all go up on ao3 when i feel like im done #billy hargrove #autistic billy hargrove #dishy writes #act like it fic

[courtney-deserved-better]

Emoji fanfic ask

❌🛒🥺⛔️

⛔ Do you have a fic you started, but scrapped?

ohoho, so many. ive posted excerpts from a few on ao3, such as the gwourtney tdwt rewrite that i scrapped & the trent comes back to tdwt instead of duncan au that i only wrote one chapter for. the rest are locked away in my files and seldom looked at.

there's a fic for a new season back on the island that takes place a year or so after tdrr with all new challenges that i gave up on after like two and a half chapters (nemma was the main couple for that one to give you a sense of how long ago i wrote it lol).

there's a tdas fic from alejandro noah courtney and gwen's povs (guess what the main ships are...) that i planned out extensively and then started writing for that i haven't worked on in years, probably because the actual writing of it didn't seem nearly as good as the planning did.

there's a really old gwent & nemma fic that i think was an au of the black friday musical? idk what i was thinking. it was bad. it was nonsensical and it was bad.

and then there was this whole high school au that mostly focused on the theatre department and was absolutely based on my high school that was a hyperspecific flavor of weird (us students described it as a combination of a summer camp and a cult so uh... i guess that isn't too far off from tdi).

there was also a post tdrr season i planned out that took place on a cruise ship and contestants competed in trios? i read the one and only chapter i wrote for that and apparently alejandro had a younger sister named marcela who is honestly kind of an icon lol i should bring her back for a different fic or something.

and pretty much assume that for every season of total drama, i had at least one rewrite planned that i eventually abandoned. honestly it's sort of a long term goal of mine to write my own version of every season of td. i've got tdwt with slippery slopes, tdrr with amicus curiae, and eventually tdi with the courtney time travel au. we'll see how long that takes lmao it's already been over a year and i'm like 40% done at the most.

❌ What's a trope you will never write?

probably any kind of soulmate au. i just don't like the idea of a romance that's so predestined that there isn't any real development between the characters. i like to read and write feelings growing organically, and when the characters instantly lock eyes and have this automatic deep connection it just feels very artificial to me. that's not to say that all soulmate aus are like that, and there's actually one or two (non td) that i enjoy and regularly reread.

but i think to write a soulmate au i would need a very strong plot revolving around soulmarks and whatnot and i would rather just have the plot without the soulmates. i feel like the concept of soulmates implies that there's only one person a character can have a meaningful relationship with and once they find that person the relationship will be perfect.

i like reading/writing about the struggles that come with making the choice to be with someone you love without any certainty that they'll be your perfect person forever. the fact that you don't have that certainty but choose to stay and foster a relationship and have that hope for a bright future together makes it a lot more meaningful to me. i also feel like soulmate aus tend to prioritize romance much higher than friendship and those are two kinds of relationships that i like to place on equal ground in my writing.

im not trying to say that all soulmate aus are bad, or that ppl shouldn't enjoy them. they can absolutely be some people's jam and if it makes you happy then go for it! there are definitely tropes i like that other people don't for valid reasons and that's all okay.

thanks for the ask!

#ask #anon #ask game