#this is v late i know skdjfkwjfwf

[michellejackson]

Would you be so kind as to fall in love with me?

Fandom: Druck

Pairing: Fatou Jallow/Kieu My Vu

Wordcount: 2580

Kieu My's POV throughout the week

You can also read it on ao3 :)

Kieu My couldn’t focus. She knew the teacher was talking and she was aware of her friend beside her trying to get her attention, but all she could think of was how bad she had fucked up with Fatou. She kept replaying last Friday’s events in her head, Constantine kept pestering her about potential hookups, and she played along as she so often did. But then, then he brought up Fatou. Kieu My wasn’t stupid. She knew what Constantine thought of Nora’s new friends, and honestly, she couldn’t be bothered with the pettiness that took over him every time she or her friends were brought up. She didn’t want any conflict, and she would not sit and listen to him talk more shit about Fatou. “It was just a stupid New Year’s kiss”. It wasn’t, and god, would she regret saying it was. Fatou, of course, had heard.

The words still echoed in her head, “crazy how I couldn’t see how fake you are, Kieu My.” She was stuck to her seat and couldn’t move, stunned. But then she thought, she wasn’t wrong, was she? Watching her walk away, Kieu My did nothing.

After a long silence the first sound that pierced the air was Constantine’s laughter. Kieu My just looked after Fatou. She could feel Finn and Ismail’s eyes closing in on her, but she only had eyes for the girl, trying to make her turn around with a mere look. Shit. “Wow, who does she think she is huh? Delusional chick actually thought you were into her? Crazy.” And yeah, that was it. She tore her gaze from Fatou and instead glared at Constantin, “grow the fuck up” she spat, and then she left. She had no more tolerance for him that day.

Or the day after, or the next one. Turns out her tolerance for Constantin’s bullshit just straight up left the building and never come back. Which is why his constant effort to get her attention in this class was just about to make her scream. She wasn’t pulled out of her thinking before she heard the teacher calling out Fatou’s name.

“-Fatou, what about the topic ‘planetary orbit’ for you? Together with…”

She looked around, no one was eager to volunteer. She looked at Fatou who looked just about done with this class. What if Kieu My just… before she knows it her hand is up in the air and the teacher notices straight away, no going back now. “Kieu My!” She summons enough courage to take a look behind her, at Fatou, but looks down straight away when she sees that she’s already staring back. Her face heats up and she tries her hardest to look unbothered. Crap, why did she do that? Did she just force a person that didn’t want anything to do with her into a group project? She internally facepalms.

“Kieu My, what the fuck, you know I suck at psychics, we agreed to team up!” Constantin was aggressively whispering at her from her right side. Kieu My rolled her eyes, “you agreed to team up, maybe you can do your own work for once.” She knew she’d never hear the end of this, but right now, she didn’t care.

When the class is over, she doesn’t know what to do with herself. Should she bolt as soon as possible or stay and try to talk to Fatou? Should she wait for Fatou to come to her? She starts packing her bag as slow as possible, praying that Fatou will come and talk to her, instead of vise versa. She does. “What was that?”

Kieu My looks up, stricken with the sternness of her voice. She didn’t know what it was she expected, but confrontation wasn’t something she had prepared herself for. Looking at Fatou, Kieu My can’t help but admire how beautiful she is, even when she looks down on her, figurately and literally, and at the moment she does both. Kieu My understands why she’s mad, but Kieu My will fix this. She’s determent to.

Realizing she spent way too much time looking at Fatou’s lips, she panics. What did she ask again? “uhm …” Oh yeah, she asked why. Why is it that every time she exchanges words with Fatou, her brain seems to malfunction? Also how does she say that she wants to spend every single minute out of her day with Fatou, without sounding like a creep?

“I thought I’m quite good in physics, and you’re rather not, so …” She curses herself. Maybe it would’ve been better to sound like a creep. Fatou rolls her eyes, Kieu My wants to roll out of this universe.

As soon as the words tumbled out of her mouth, she wished she could take them back, this was no way to win over the girl she had continuously let down while pining for from afar. Kieu My knew that Fatou had been struggling in this class, the girl always had her attention, but not only was her comment making it blatantly obvious that she was watching her like a creep, but it also clearly struck a chord.

“What do you want?”

Kieu My just looked at her, wishing it was obvious to Fatou. Wishing it was obvious to herself. What did she want? She wanted for this to be easy, she wanted for her friends to understand her better, for them to be less assholes, she wanted for Fatou to not look at her this way, as if she was the worst kind of person. But then again, maybe she was.

“I want to help you” and she does. She wants to help Fatou with anything she needs, or anything she doesn’t need. She just wants to be near her.

“Why can’t you just say what you really want for once?” Now she just looks frustrated, and Kieu My can’t even blame her. Fatou looks at her, but Kieu My can’t look her in the eyes. The teacher eventually ends their conversation and Kieu My is once again stuck watching her walk away. But it was fine, she would text Fatou later, they would meet up for the project and she would get to explain herself. Everything would be fine.

---

Everything was not fine. It had been 23 hours since Kieu My texted Fatou, and there was no sign of any type of answer from her. Lying in bed, Kieu My threw a pillow over her head and screamed. She deserved this, she knows that, but it doesn’t make the situation any better. She threw the pillow over to the end of her bed and looked at the unanswered messages she already sent, they were simple, she asked if Fatou had unmatched her on tinder (which totally was a rhetorical question, she knew she had. Damn cat gif) and apologized for hijacking her project. Or… apologize maybe isn’t the right word, shit. Maybe she should’ve apologized first. Why is this so hard?

She had already sent four messages, she can’t send any more right? It would look too desperate. Fingers hovering over the keyboard she came to a realization; she was that desperate. So she tries again, this time asking a question, hoping that would make it easier to answer. - Just wanted to ask how we're going to do this physics project - When do you want to meet? Maybe on Friday?

The texts all go unanswered. Sitting at school with Ismail, she can’t help but check WhatsApp. Every damn minute. Maybe she lost her phone? No, that’s not right, Kieu My has religiously been checking her insta, her phone is clearly working. Maybe she just hasn’t had the time to check? Maybe her notifications are off? Maybe she just doesn’t want anything to do with her… At this point she’s just frustrated with herself; how did she get to this point? She hoped this wasn’t what Fatou was feeling when Kieu My had let her messages go unanswered while stressing over what to do.

Ismail keeps pointing their phone in her face, laughing at a joke she’s not yet in on. After a while she gets annoyed. Maybe it’s a combination of lack of sleep, not being able to stop thinking about the girl that is currently ghosting her and last, but not least, Ismail not being able to stop pushing their phone up her face. She snaps.

“Ismail, what the fuck.”

Their smile drops and they lay their phone on the table. “Well, someone’s in a mood.” Rolling her eyes, Kieu My looks at her phone again. She can feel Ismail’s eyes on her. She looks up from her phone to locks eyes with them, now entering a staring contest as Ismail tries to work out what’s up with her. It takes minutes before Ismail opens their mouth again.

“Is this about Fatou?”

This surprises her, she starts blinking, seemingly losing the contest. “What?” was she that obvious? No… She hasn’t talked about Fatou to any of her friends, not even Zoe, how could any of them know? None of them had any reason to. All they knew was that they kissed on New Year’s, and she dismissed that in front of all of them, in front of Fatou herself. That’s literally the reason she’s stuck in this situation in the first place. She’d been so careful. What did she do wrong? Ismail smiles.

“You know, I always thought you were hard to read regarding your crushes, because you never like, looked longingly at anyone. You never stressed about any of the guys you talked to, and you always looked so at ease with them, bored, but at ease.”

Kieu My looked down at her phone, trying to find something to say, but Ismail beat her to it, “you’ve zooned out so much lately, and do you know what the common factor is every single time? It’s Fatou. You’re always looking in her direction. Every single time. You even smile a little.”

She looks up at Ismail, they’ve really noticed all that?

“You long for Fatou, Kieu My.”

She was at a loss for words. There was no use in denying it, Ismail looked to have her all figured out. She felt exposed, uncomfortable. They didn’t really talk about stuff like that, any of them. Not Zoe, not Finn, and certainly not Constantin. What made Ismail start now? Should she just brush it off?

“Also, the other day when she called you out in the schoolyard you looked like a kicked puppy, honestly it was devastating.” This took her out of her trance, she laughed, and Ismail laughed with her. “God, I really screwed that up.” Ismail looked at her with sympathy, something they rarely show. “What happened?” they asked, and so Kieu My went on to tell someone about Fatou for the first time. She felt liberated for once, and Ismail confirmed a theory Kieu My had long contemplated; that she had royally fucked up.

---

Later that day she decided to text Fatou yet again. What was it that Fatou asked her again? What she really wants? Kieu My closed her eyes and debated whether this was a good idea or not. Summoning the courage, she sent off two texts, but the most important and honest one being,

“Somehow I have to think about you all the time.”

That’s the truth. No matter how hard Kieu My tries, she can’t get Fatou out of her head. That’s the truth she had spent so long trying to avoid. This was the last message she would send she decided. If Fatou didn’t want to hear from her anymore, she wouldn’t push. She would ask the teacher for a new subject partner and she’d bother Fatou no more. That’s the least she could do.

---

The next day she didn’t see a trace of Fatou, which in Kieu My’s mind was good, she wasn’t sure if she could handle public confrontation again. It would be better if they were somewhere alone, somewhere they could talk about everything, away from school. Yeah, maybe she was a little anxious, but confessing to the girl of your dreams could do that to you. The thought of being rejected after being vulnerable could do that to you.

“Hey, Stranger!” Zoe raced from behind her, making Kieu My jump. “God, Zoe! You scared me!” Zoe just looked at her knowingly, “stuck in your head again, huh?”. Kieu My knew that Zoe knew that something was up with her, and she also knew that it was really starting to unnerve the girl. She had kept pestering her about it, but Kieu My just brushed it off every time, it seemed she did that a lot.

They walked together towards the school, the silence between them was strangling her. After talking with Ismail yesterday, she’d tried to figure out the best way to tell Zoe too, after opening up she realized that not talking about her feelings was actually taking a toll on her. Zoe was her best friend; she really should’ve told her a long time ago. Kieu My stopped walking.

“I kissed Fatou!”

Her outburst made Zoe stop too and look back at her. She smiled her usual smile, “yes I know, Constantin told me about your ‘stupid New Year’s kiss’” she brushed it off. Zoe didn’t get it. Kieu My tried to find the best way to phrase it.

“No, you don’t understand, I like kissed her-kissed her. Like I didn’t feel like doing anything else. I-” she closed her eyes, not sure of what Zoe’s reaction would be, “-it wasn’t just a stupid kiss, I really like her, and I’ve liked her for a while,” she opened her eyes to look anywhere but at Zoe. “I think about her all the time, it’s exhausting, and it’s so STUPID, because I fucked up and now, she doesn’t want anything to do with me.” Her eyes were getting wet, but no tears were spilling. “And… and I was scared to tell you, because… I don’t know, because I haven’t really felt this about anyone before, and I don’t like to talk about my feelings!” her words were all messed up and rolling out in one go, she wasn’t sure if she was even making sense at this point.

She finally looked at Zoe. The girl was grinning, so bright as to compete with the sun. She stretched out her arms as if she were to hug her and squealed, “Q! you have a crush!” Kieu My wasn’t sure what reaction she expected, but Zoe’s excitement was catching her off guard. She welcomed the hug though. She needed that. “It doesn’t matter, she won’t really talk to me, and I can’t blame her.” Zoe pulled away and scoffed, “girlie! Honestly, don’t even sweat it, I’m here now! C’mon, catch me up on everything!” So she did, and she felt much better.

Kieu My hung out with Zoe the rest of the day, feeling better every second. Even though Zoe kept telling her how bad she was at flirting, the smile never left her face. Kieu My felt content now, if Fatou decided to give her a second chance there would be nothing holding her back. Except maybe her flirting and overall hopelessness with girls.

Kieu My didn’t even notice the message on her phone until she got home.

It was from Fatou.

“Tomorrow half past three at my place”

Kieu My let out the biggest breath, and smiled.

#this is v late i know skdjfkwjfwf #have mercy #kieutou #kieu my vu #fatou jallow #druck #druck fic #fanfic