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#upstairs is loud and no privacy and everytime i sit in view of anyone
soldier-poet-king · 1 year
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God FORBID I want to take up space OUTSIDE of my 100 sq ft basement bedroom-prison, in this house, where I LIVE
#franposting#everytime im like oh ok living here isnt the absolute worst#shit like this happens#for fucks sake all I wanted was to set up bro 2 small weight bench in the downstairs bathroom#WHICH IS THE SAME SQUARE FOOTAGE AS MY ACTUAL BEDROOM#its HUGE and doesnt have yknow a bed desk dresser etc#and no one uses the downstairs bathroom except me and my dad#but NOOOO my mother is insanelt controlling and it makes visual clutter and she refuses to treat her actual obsessiveness#so i was given the option of the garage (cold dark spiders and we dont have an interior entrance qnd also its full of my dads shit)#or laundry/storage room (cold unfinished full of spiders and dust which im ALLERGIC TO#and also it doesnt have a door or a lock and i would straight up rather lift with the gym bros#than in view of my family#the gym bros are LESS judgemental#y do u think i do all my physio excercises in the bathroom or bedroom behind a locked door#i dont want to be PERCEIVED by my family#god forbid i try to exist outside my room prison#cant use the downstairs lounge bc allergic to upholstery#upstairs is loud and no privacy and everytime i sit in view of anyone#and also theres just no space????? plus my mother is always watching hallmark movies at volume 500#ITS A VERY SMALL BUNGALOW WITH TOO MANY PPL#but also i cant afford to move out in the GTA and thats where the jobs are wnd where my job is#and im not moving in with randos and have no friends in the area needing roomates#literally fucking kill me#everydya i miss my shoebox apartment. it was so#so so small and lonely but it was safe and private and mine and i was allowed to exist without judgement and rules#im not an exquisitely unwell suciidal teej anymore but i still feel like im losing parts of myself#theyre dying and im never going to be whole and it just keeps shrinking and shrinking#and i KNOW im weird and have odd needs for my living situation to keep me mentally sane#and its selfish and whiny of me to want very specific kind of roomate and not strangers in this economy#or to just live alone
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stay--satan · 6 years
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Rose in Red: CHAPTER 1
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This story is loosely based in DC Cinematic Universe before the Batman vs Superman events
Before aliens, super villains groups, kids with super powers, there was a family. They weren’t blood related, but it was his family Until one clown ended all and now they were strangers. One is supposed to be dead, the other one living another life and the last trying to live up by his own name. Five years ago a clown teared his family apart. Bruce learned five years ago that maybe his rules weren’t the thing that made him a better man. Maybe vengeance was all that he had left.
SUMMARY
CHAPTER 1 - Looking back
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The man could touch the silence that took over the house. A house once he was so happy and proud. The house where he once thought about raising his children and their children after that.
"BOYS!" He screams with the running in the upstairs hall. The oldest puts his head in the stairs "May I know why you are not ready?" "He's talking to Sophie Smith" the other one said behind the man caughting by surprise "Who's this?" "Dick's girfriend" the boy gives a devilish smile and out of nowhere there is a baseball ball hitting in his stomach. Grunting loudly from the pain he makes his way to uptairs so he could fight back, but is pushed back by his father "No, the only reason you're going up there is to put some pants. God Jason, where are your pants" "I was eating and I didn't want them dirty" he says guilty letting go of his embrace and run back to his room "RICHARD, HELP YOUR BROTHER WITH HIS TIE" "Why am I the one to do it?" Dick whine from his room. Bruce sighs massaging his temples "Because you're both late and Alfred is sick so he can't help you... Also because I said so!" he says the last part a little louder. God he missed Alfred.
Bruce walks in the destroyed home, it's so different then what it used to be. The walls now are covered in criminal's graffiti from the invasion, it had a awful mold smell and it was dark than ever did before. He wonders if it's not because he was alone there. The house never liked to be empty,
"Guys. Living room, now!" The two boys ran their way to the room finding a very interested Alfred and concern Bruce, still dressed as Batman but without the cowl. Dick's the first one to notice something different about him. He sees a girl behind him, not much younger than him with his 16 years. "Everyone, this is Rose." Bruce pushes the girl by the shoulders so she can come forward "She... Something bad happened to her family, so now we're gonna be her family." Jason's expression for the first time isn't angrish. He feels the heaten taking over his cheeks as she timidly smiles to them.
He walks towards where once used to be the kids room. Luckily or not, those were the least demaged places in the house. He first goes to Dick's, opening the door so carefully as he was still there in his privacy. Bruce could see all clearly now, like it was ten years ago. His boy with loud music in his ears while training with a punch bag. He never liked to train in the cave saying it was 'too dark' for him. So he did the basics in his room with the view to outside.
"Do you want to talk about it?" "I thought I said to leave me alone" the boy looks back to his window. Bruce walks to him sitting right beside him "Look, I get it. You're feeling misplaced" "I went away for a few months to help my team and you already find a replacement" he grunts still not looking the man in the eyes "Richard, the situation with Jason is complicated." "Always is" "But I'm not replacing anyone okay?" the boy still acts like he wasn't there. Bruce sighs straighting himself "You found your place, Dick. You can't lie to me and say that you don't miss your team and rather be here. You are now part of something bigger of your own" Dick moves his head staring the floor "And Jason, he is... He is lost. And he really admired you and all your work okay? I just want to give him this part of your life that you had. Not only the Robin situation, but feeling part of something. And if you wanna leave to be a full time part of your team like Barbara did, you'll always be welcome to my home and the family, son." Dick looks at Bruce with such caring words he never heard before, placing the angrish face with a hug to his father.
Now, he looks at the red door in front of him half destroyed. Bruce licks his lips before coming in taking a good look in the dameged. This time, it wasn't the criminals that did it, but the owner of the room. He walks in the next purple and black room, still with marks from ripped posters. He feels now the most organized room of the house now were the most mess. With broken windows and kicked door, he could still hear the scream from that night. But yet, he tried to push that memory a little bit longer remembering another one.
"Why you don't wanna go?" "Because it's a ridiculous captalist event that rich people have so they can press their money in other rich's face" Rosa cross her arm staring at the car's window. Bruce had picked her up from school and saw a group of girls making fun for not having a date to the Debutante Ball. He knew she got the invitation because he got one too "Plus it's pointless the whole idea of 'introducing women to society' as if this will give us some respect" she grunts again Rose was oficially Bruce Wayne's first daughter. She was the only one out of the two boys who accepted Bruce's request to a legal adoption changing her last name and call him a father. She had the nerves of the Batman and the stubborness of Bruce. "Look, I get it. It's embarrassing." he starts "But when I was young, my mother took me when I was 8." she looks at him respectufully. Everytime he talked to her about his parents, she would drop any atitude down to listen. "And as every 8 year old boy, I was bored to pretty much everything. But she still insisted." he smiles remembering "So she putted me in a fancy suit and took me by her arm. And I didn't understand the point of all of this. I saw girls with underage drinking, some heavy action between couples and I thought it was so stupid to pull out a stunt like that I mean, it was a party with a huge excuse to teenagers to do what they couldn't do back in home. But then, they start to annouce the girls and their fathers. And I looked at them, tearing up, clapping loudly and proudly. But they hadn't no idea what was going on behind the curtains. But my mother knew, she was one of them before and she was still there, tearing up and clapping loudly to each girl. I didn't understand why until I was your age and came to one with this girl, Rachel." he gives a corner smile remembering her again "And I was in another view than when I was 8, you know? I was the one who walked down stairs with a girl in my arm feeling like the biggest boy in the place. It wasn't until the dance starts that I realised that the party wasn't about having formal interactions and expansive drinking. It was a celebration for their kids, and for themselves. It was to be able to gush over them about how proud they are and how far they come. Do you understand?"
Rose nodds to him quietly "So as your father, I would very much like to be there for you this day. No one beside us knows your story, but I do. And I want to clap loudly and proudly of how much I am proud to where you are today."
Back in the present, Bruce kneels on the floor finding her necklace on the floor. The same one he gave her as Debutante present. He puts in his pocket taking one last look before heading to the last one, the big red door.
"I thought you would be leaving with Dick?" he says to the boy sitting on his bed reading. He stopped saying brother a while ago since their fight about him not being his father or any of them their brother. It took a while to Bruce get used to, but he was right. His parents were alive, he just didn't want any contact with them and rather stay with Bruce. Also the world's great detective wasn't that dumb. He had noticed stuff "You sure you don't wanna go with me and Rose? We won't be out long" He sees the boy stops reading and stares his bed thinking before shaking his head. Bruce make his way out before hearing Jason call. "Yes?" "Do you ever... Do you ever wanted something you know it's wrong but you don't know what to do to get over it?" Jason talked really low so no one could hear them. Bruce closes the door behind him walking towards to the kid. "What do you mean?" "Like, like when you had that drinking problem. You knew it was bad and disgusting, but eventually you got over it... How did you do it?" Bruce let's out a deep breath before facing the 17 year old teenager again "Are you talking about something physical or feelings?" Jason only stared at him knewing what he meant "Jason, you're not disgusting because of this." "How could I not?" "She's not your sister" "But I live with her! And now I... I-I can't stop thinking about her" "Jason, look at me." he pushs the boy over the shoulders "Since she came in, I see the way you act around her. You might only be realising that now, but I've been longer before you did. Why do you think I made sure you both knew your place in this family?" the boy kept quiet while hearing the old man's words "If there's anything I learned over the years is that family isn't just blood related or nicknames. It's about ties. You're my family Jason because I trust you with my eyes closed and I love you. You're family to her because you both trust each other and are bond to always have each other's back. Not because I adopted her or put you under my wing, but because of trust. But I need to know if you are willing to face this and telling her the same" "Yes, Bruce" "Good, then put your suit. We're leaving in 20 minutes"
"I knew I would found you here, Sir" Bruce turns around to see Alfred grinning to him "I had to come back here" "I know sir, I'm not the one to judge" Bruce takes another look in the room fill with graffitis. But they were different from the others downstairs "I called her for you sir, she is on her way" "Did you tell her?" "No, I believe is not my place..." Bruce sighed taking a looking to the red wall "I am afraid she won't recover from this" "Master Wayne, if I may... Miss Wayne had enough in her life. Her feelings might be shattered, but this is the right thing to do. For the first time in my life, I believe that you made a wise decision. There will be consequences, but it'll be a start" Bruces looks at Alfred finally agreeing. He stares at the wall with his huge symbol painted in red written THINK He had think and the truth was way worse than he expected. "You know how Miss Wayne is about Master Todd. She'll come to her senses sooner than Master Dick."
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