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cecilspeaks · 7 years
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113 - Niecelet
Gooooooood eevening, fine citizens. I’m your late night host this week, here to keep you company after sundownn.
Welcome to Night Vale!
As you regular listeners already know, I took over the night shifts this week, because I’ve been spending my days with a very special house guest. Well, more like one and a half house guests. My favorite cousin Sabina is visiting, and she’s 7 months pregnant with what will be my second ever niece. Well, my first ever niece once removed. First ever niece once removed? That takes too long, let’s do – “niecelet”.
My sister’s daughter Janice is a teenager. It’s been so long since I’ve had a new baby in my family so, if you hear a certain knowing, avuncular quality in my voice, it’s because you are listening to an expecting uncle. I’m already getting some of those leather patches sewed onto the elbows of my windbreaker.
All week, Sabina and I have been reading baby books, and I am a veritable expert at this point. A baby at 7 months is as big as an eggplant. She can already get the hiccups and déjà-baby-vu, and has a fully developed sense of comedic timing. I’m holding an eggplant with me here in this studio to practice supporting her neck. Also to make sure I have something to eat when I get home. Sabina’s cleaned out the fridge pretty thoroughly.
Back at my place, Sabina’s been keeping the radio on 24/7, so the niecelet will know the owner of this dulcet baritone already loves her very much. Hello, almost-niece!
Doing all this reading together, it seems crazy to learn just how vulnerable we are, when we first enter the world. Did you know that a newborn doesn’t even have kneecaps yet? That it has a hole in the top of its skull, which must be taped shut so the newborn does not escape through it during the night? It’s amazing any of us survive to the shaming ceremonies at all!
Speaking of rites of passage, the annual Night Vale Science Fair is scheduled for this Monday night. Every fourth grader is expected to report to the Rec Center for a fun-filled evening of free programs and live demonstrations. Organizers say the kiddos will have a chance to make a 1:1 scale volcano, that spews real ash and molten igneous rock. They’ll learn how a pile of pennies can be transformed into a battery, simply by taking those pennies to Walgreens and exchanging them for a pack of Duracell double A’s. They’ll learn about about centripetal force by pouring a bucket full of water, and then filling out a worksheet on centripetal force. They’ll plant a bean sprout in a Styrofoam cup that won’t disintegrate until their grandchildren have set off on exploratory missions to find another planet that can support bean sprouts.
Hmm, what else might be on the Community Calendar this week, you ask? Well, let me work at my own pace over here, OK pal? Like all jobs worth doing, this one takes focus and patience. You can’t just rush through it. As my optometrist says, “measure twice, cut once, then do the left eye.” So I guess that’s really measure four times total and cut two times, but I had an astigmatism so I ended up just sticking with contacts anyway.
Sooo.. [papers rustling] let’s see here. [clears throat] M-h-h-h-hmm, this week’s events. On Tuesday night, head over to the Band Shell to hear a set from Ouroboros, the rock band that only plays covers of their own songs. Wednesday, Ablution in Fresca to celebrate the start of the Andorran New Year. Thursday is Thirsty Thursday. Consume no liquids. You’re gonna get real thirsty! Friday has been indefinitely delayed by weather at O’Hare, and is now pleading with a United representative for a hotel voucher to avoid sleeping in a plastic chair in Concourse C.
Early morning on Saturday, we are in for a rare astronomical treat. The Earth will fully eclipse the Sun, blotting out its light completely, so that only a ring of wispy blue remains visible against the blackness. Now this eclipse will not be observable on Earth, of course, and to our knowledge there is no planet on which this phenomenon could be observed. There’s just nothing on that particular vector in space, but at 4:13 AM on Saturday morning, the total eclipse will occur, and that blue corona will shine softly in the dark, like a delicate smoke ring. And that dim blue halo will represent the entirety of us. Our dramas, dreams, and disappointments. The first ride without the training wheels. Our 8th grade dances. Our double Windsors and our veils, our sleepless nights in waiting rooms. Our rush hour commuters, our dozing through recitals til the one we love goes on. Our crying in the car as the one we love leaves home. Just that thin filament of blue, on which we wage our peace.
The on Sunday, tacos and gun safety with Three-eyed Bill at First Methodist.
Stay tuned, savvy listeners, for in a moment I’ll be sharing Night Vale’s third quarter economic development report. To my knowledge, we’ve never had an economic development report before for any quarter, but the press release looked official, and we all know that new municipal arms of government form all the time. Arms that then pull back to be reabsorbed by the government shoulder from which they sprouted.
But before crunching those numbers, a quick message from today’s sponsor. Equinox Gym. At Equinox, we focus on the whole body. Particularly, the soft and vulnerable parts of that body. Stop by our windowless complex today to meet with a dietician about this month’s promotion, the Zima cleanse. Or for even faster results, nothing torches calories like our calorie torch. Also, new members this week to Equinox receive 60 days of free access to our popular Judgment Spa. This has been a word from our sponsor.
[booming voice] Now to business news. Whoa! Did that sound unusually powerful to you? Ooh, I sorta took myself by surprise there, like I grew a suit or something! [chuckles] [clears throat] The Night Vale Economic Development Board, or NV-ec-dev-B for short and cumbersome, sent a press release at the closing bell of the Night Vale stock exchange. The bulletin said that futures are down, way down. Although the recent past is trading briskly. In response to declining levels of interests, NV-ec-dev-B plans to incentivize consumer spending. At the start of tomorrow’s business day, they’ll launch an abject prompt campaign of xenophobia, branded as nationalism, branded as civic bride, branded as a 2008 F150 Ford truck with satellite radio, air conditioned seats, and a heavy-duty hitch to haul away whatever it is you’re trying to hide.
So make plans this weekend to head out towards the used car lot with your hands in the air and your checkbook in your mouth, to meet with a sales person about financing options. You might be surprised by how few years of indentured servitude can you get you behind the wheel of a Ford truck.
You know what cars make me think of? Well, Carlos. I guess, but everything makes me think of Carlos. And his name is an anagram of “Lo cars”. He’s out of town at Erlenmeyer Flask Con this week, and I miss something fierce! But what I was going to say is that the thought of buying a car reminds me of my niecelet! It’s extraordinary to think that she’ll be a teenager some day, getting her driver’s permit, then her license, then her crossbow - going through all of these phases we all pass through. It’s like there’s a future attached to her already. Inside Sabina, there’s a baby, and seated inside the baby there’s the toddler. And within her are the blueprints for the girl. And soon, she’ll be out here learning to play the sitar and considering vegetarianism, then voting and buying lottery tickets. Well, those are the same thing really. And I’ll get to bear witness to this blooming life. Some day, she might even decide to have a niece of her own.
[tearily] Oh, OK. Um, something is in young Cecil’s eye over here. Ooh! Hang tight, team, I’m just gonna run out and grab a bunch of tissues from the supply closet to remove this bothersome… [key turns in lock, falls down] OK, listeners, I must admit I’m in a state of concerned agitation here. When I tried to open the door of the studio, the handle – came off in my hand and and and and when I went to reinsert it, I found that the hole was (tamped) full of soft hot tar, which cannot be up to code. So now I find myself in a small, soundproof, airtight room with a doorless handle in my left hand and a handle-less door before me. I’m uh… Huh… I’m- I’m I’m uncertain of just how to proceed, uh, I can’t imagine there’s more than a few hours’ worth of oxygen in here, even if the studio’s potted fern works double duty on converting the carbon dioxide.
Oh man and of course, I left my phone in my jeans in the other room, you know, after I changed into my professional radio hosting unitard. I, OK, I need some time to assess the situation.
I’ll leave you to the weather.
[Weather: "If We Live" by Disparition]
OK. OK, OK, alright calm down, calm down Cecil, calm down, and you can beat this. be like the patient viper who does not strike until his prey is upon him. [sharp exhale] Be like the praying mantis whose head is a guitar pick. Keep your heart rate low and your focus steady, and good God, sit down, man. Save your strength. Breathe deep enough to get the air inside your brain and think. What would an uncle do?
Hmmm. Hummmmmmmm. [getting faster and higher] Hmmmmmmmmmmm, hmmmmmmmmmmm-hmmmmmmmmmmmm… Oh! OK, I’ve got it. Easy, I just need one of you to come and open the door. [chuckles] OK, here I am behaving like I’m alone, but of course I’m not alone, ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, I’ve got all of Night Vale listening. Ooh, that is a relief! Come to think of it, I imagine hundreds of you may be on your way already, and I can’t have the whole town rushing over all at once. That would cause traffic jams, hysteria, straightline winds gusting up to 60 knots. [laughs] If you’re on your way, just shoot quick flare into the sky, so that everybody knows you’re the one on the way. M-more importantly so that I know you’re on the way.
You guys, it’s like 8 PM, you’re not all in your PJ’s yet. Just need one person to make the trip. It’s like an 8-minute drive from your apartment, come on! Is… Is no one listening? I mean, the memo from management at the last all-staff meeting did mention low late night ratings but – this is not low, this is talking into a tin can on string whose other end is tied to a fire hydrant at the bottom of the sea, this is utter futility, this is falling in the woods and no one’s there to hear you. This is not seeing the Cecil for the trees, this is – Kafka meets Becket and tells him to talk to the hand. This is – stop, full stop. Cecil. [deep breath] This indignation does me no good at all. Just burns through my oxygen supply, which is running low already. This rate, I’ll never survive until the morning commuters tune in. Just think, Cecil. Think like an uncle.
Ooh. That’s it! There is at least one person listening. Babies never sleep thru the night, right? So you, niecelet, you should be able to hear me. Tho I imagine the sound of my voice may be muffled by the blankets on the guest bed and Sabina’s abdominal muscles. Alright, niecelet, I need you. We’ve got to find a way to wake up Sabina. I need you to kick, brace your little elbows on the soft wall behind you and really kick! Aim for a spot under the ribs, that roof of bone above you. And again. [pants rhythmically] Kick! Good, again! [pants rhythmically] Kick! Good, again! Now give it everything you’ve got this time! Sabina, wake up! This is an emergency! Wake u-
Oh. The station phone is ringing. God I forgot we even had this. uh caller, you’re on the air.
Sabina: Hey, Cecil. The baby was keeping me up and I turned on the station and-
Cecil: Sabina! Oh, thank God you’re awake! No, no it’s not a shtick, listen. I am trapped in the studio and I just need someone to open the door from the outs-
Sabina: Oh OK, I’ll be right there. But I’m starving, I may stop by Subway for a mashed potato and Nutella sandwich.
Cecil: No, please come now! We’ve got snacks in the breakroom pantry.. I think. I’ll set you up with some (gorb and gevilta) fish.
Sabina: Alright. Hey, did you know that there’s a faceless old woman living in your home? She keeps trying to put lotion on my belly, while I’m sleeping.
Cecil: Yeah, she does that. Listen, my spare office keys are by the lucky cat. See you soon, and thank you Sabina!
Sabina: Hey, enough with the lotion, lady!
Ooooohh. And thank you, niecelet! At negative two months old, you’ve already saved a life! And somehow I get the feeling mine might be just the first of many. If you need bailing out of a tight spot some day, you know who to call. I’m the baritone you can count on any time, kid, day or night shift.
Ahhh, man! I can’t wait for that door to open so I can get a lungful of fresh air. Oh, it’s funny how small a room can feel when you’re not allowed to leave. Oh, sorry I [chuckles] forgot who I was talking to for a second. Well, as soon as you’re out here breathing air yourself, I’m getting you a pair of cleats and a pair of baby shinguards and a baby cape, too. I can’t wait to meet you, little hero of a niecelet! But first, I’m making your mother some midnight eggplant parmesan.
Stay tuned next for the sounds of a door opening, a rush of oxygen-rich air, and a wheezing celebration of an overworked respiratory system. Aany second now. Aaaany second. Aaaaaanyyyy secondd.
[long silence]
Today’s proverb: Follow your heart. You need it. Where did it ever learn to walk? 
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Our God is an awesome god, much better than that ridiculous god that Desert Bluffs has.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 32nd week today (Monday 13th April 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 31: A Blinking Light Up On The Mountain.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 53 to 59)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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aare-babatunde · 4 years
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“Obasanjo: The Enemy Within”, delivered by Adeyinka Grandson on the 18th January 2018
Being transcript of the lecture, “Obasanjo: The Enemy Within”, delivered by Adeyinka Grandson on the 18th January 2018:
1. The many atrocities of Obasanjo against the Yoruba nation and her citizenry:
2. On 29 July 1975, the military regime of Yakubu Gowon was overthrown and replaced by another military regime headed by Murtala Mohammed who was killed on February 13, 1976.
3. On February 13, 1976, Obasanjo was imposed by the Hausa/Fulani as a military Head of State and ruled Nigeria for almost four years.
4. In 1976, Obasanjo wanted television and radio stations for the Hausa/Fulani and began with a takeover of the Yoruba’s Western Nigerian Government Broadcasting Corporation (WNTV), and turned it into the Nigerian Television Authority (NTA), and the Federal Radio Corporation of Nigeria (FRCN).
5. In September 1976, Obasanjo introduced the Universal Primary Education (UPE), to bring the Yoruba nation at par with the Hausa/Fulani nation educationally with the takeover of all the Yoruba teacher training colleges and established secondary schools side by side with all primary schools, including privately owned High Schools across Yorubaland and began to change the curriculum under his central government’s Universal Primary Education Programme (UPE), which affected the Yoruba education negatively till date.
6. In 1976, Obasanjo, as part of bringing the Hausa/Fulani nation at par with the Yoruba nation educationally, ensured that the University of Ife (now Obafemi Awolowo University), belonging to the governments of the Yoruba people, was taken over by the Federal Government, through the NUC reconstituted Decree No. 1 of 1976.
7. In 1976, Obasanjo nationalized the Liberty Stadium, Ibadan (now Obafemi Awolowo Stadium), among others belonging to the governments of the Yoruba people, was similarly taken over by the Nigerian Military authorities, under Obasanjo.
8. In 1976, the Yoruba Western Nigeria Marketing Board, which was particularly promoting cocoa farmers, was abolished by Obasanjo.
9. In 1976, Obasanjo, sought to increase Hausa/Fulani local food production by reducing that of the Yoruba nation, and thus dabbled extensively into the Yoruba Agriculture farm settlements, took them over at random under his fraudulent Operation Feed the Nation programme. The Yoruba people never dependent on the North for food, but since Obasanjo took away the Yoruba’s farm settlements through his fraudulent Operation Feed the Nation programme, Yorubaland has relied on the North for its food.
10. In 1977, Fela’s compound Kalakuta Republic, housed his family, band members, and a recording studio. It had a free health clinic. The compound was burned to the ground on February 18, 1977 after an assault by a thousand armed Hausa/Fulani’s soldiers on the instruction of Obasanjo.
11. In 1978, Fela’s mother Funmilayo Ransome-Kuti was thrown from a third-floor window of Fela’s Kalakuta Republic house, when it was stormed by armed Hausa/Fulani’s military personnel sent there by Obasanjo. Fela’s mother lapsed into a coma in February of that year, and died on 13 April 1978, as a result of her injuries.
12. On 29th of March 1978, Obasanjo, made the Land Use Act an integral part of the constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. The Land Use Act, which reads: “All the rights formerly vested in the holder in respect of the excess of the land shall in the commencement of this Act be extinguished and the excess of the land shall be taken over by the State and Federal Government and administered as provided in this Act.” The Land Use Act was promulgated into law to essentially take the Yoruba’s ports and waterways away from the control of the Yoruba people and into the hands of the Hausa/Fulani. The act altered the existing land laws in Yorubaland by removing families and chiefs from the trusteeship of the land and replaced them with the Federal and State governments, thus constituting the greatest clog in the wheel of housing development in Yorubaland.
13. In 1979, Obasanjo openly boasted of how he rigged Alhaji Shehu Shagari, a Fulani against Chief Obafemi Awolowo, a Yoruba in the 1979 presidential elections while serving as a military Head of State.
14. It should be mentioned that the Fulani decorated Obasanjo as the Head of State, but the real power behind the throne was a Fulani Lieutenant Colonel who was catapulted overnight to Brigadier General in the person of Shehu Yar’Adua.
15. Obasanjo forced Major General Olutoye, now Oba of Idoani to retire. His offense was telling Obasanjo to co-opt minority groups into the Federal Government who have been neglected. Obasanjo went and told Yar Adua, called General Olutoye to say what he told him in the presence of Yar’Adua. The man repeated it and he was retired the next day.
16. In 1967, when Brigadier Banjo invaded former Midwest, and reached Ore, he sent messages to Obasanjo, through Professor Soyinka. Banjo didn’t want to enter Yorubaland just like that. Obasanjo revealed what Soyinka told him to General Gowon. Professor Soyinka was detained to spend over two years in detention.
17. In 1991, the Lagos State population was 4.4 million. The old Kano State population, that’s (Kano and Jigawa), in 1991 was 4.2 million. Lagos State has the highest population, then in 1991. But in 2006, Lagos State population increased from 4.4 million to 9.4 million, whilst that of the old Kano State, increased from 4.2 million to 15.5m (Kano 9.8m and Jigawa 5.6m). The census of 2006 was conducted under Obasanjo.
18. In 1993, Obasanjo stated that Abiola wasn’t our Messiah.
19. In 1998, Obasanjo agreed in principle with the Hausa/Fulani to have Abiola, the winner of the 1993 presidential election murdered by the Fulani. He was thereafter appointed as President of Nigeria in 1999 by the Fulani.
20. On 26 November 1999, Obasanjo gave an instruction to the Police that anyone who calls himself OPC should be arrested and if he doesn’t agree should be shot on sight. Many Yoruba youths lost their lives as a consequence of such a barbarous order on young Yoruba people.
21. In 2000, Obasanjo frustrated the Lagos State independent power projects and caused the project to be either poorly operational or yet to be fully come alive after gulping billions of Naira.
22. As President, Obasanjo stopped the 4th Mainland Bridge by refusing to give the necessary country guarantee to secure a world bank loan.
23. During his administration as President, Obasanjo awarded Kano to Bornu Road, an 8 lanes road of 600km; Kaduna to Abuja Road, a 4 lanes road of 200km; while Lagos-Ibadan Expressway, Ilorin to Akure Road, combined are not upto 500km, and Kogi to Lagos road of 350km were left undone.
24. In 2004, Obasanjo as President of Nigeria, withheld the Lagos state local government funds, following the creation of 37 new local government development areas (LCDAs), in Lagos State. The Supreme Court ruled that the creation of the council was in order, but Obasanjo withheld the Lagos fund. This contributed to the slow rate of development in Lagos.
25. According to Lam Adesina, the former Governor of Oyo State, in an interview with a PUNCH correspondence, Obasanjo and Atiku murdered Chief Bola Ige.
26. Obasanjo was the man who rigged sickly Yar’Adua, a Fulani, President of Nigeria in 2007.
27. On the instructions of Obasanjo, former UK Foreign Secretary, Mr William Hague, consulted for the APC on how to implicate President Jonathan over the 200 Chibok school girls.
28. In 2015, Obasanjo nominated Buhari for President and as the APC navigator, enlisted the support of President Obama, Senator John McCain and Senator Hillary Clinton to undermine Jonathan’s administration in favour of a Fulani President of Nigeria.
29. Obasanjo worked with the United States, the United Kingdom and France to make sure Buhari, a Fulani, was rigged as President of Nigeria in 2015.
30. The horrible half Igbo and half Yoruba man is working very hard to make Sule Lamido, yet another Fulani the President of Nigeria in 2019.
31. Obasanjo is NOT a Yoruba person. He was born in Yorubaland and carries Yoruba tribal mark. However, his paternity is not Yoruba. It has been proved and confirmed that Obasanjo’s father was an Igbo man, a colonial police officer who served in Abeokuta. The origin of his mother is, however, Yoruba.
32. If Obasanjo were to be a white in America, for going against the collective interests of the white Americans, he would have since been decimated. If he were to be an English in Britain and doing everything against the collective interests of the English people in Britain, he would also have been decimated. Simply because the young Yoruba have not fully grasped the concept of self-preservation, they are still treating Obasanjo with unmerited respect.
33. Yorubaland could have been great, but Obasanjo has stunned our growth.
34. For God and the Yoruba Country, now is the time for the Yoruba youth to treat Obasanjo appropriately.
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Perhaps you noticed something strange yesterday, and perhaps you have forgotten it.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 33rd week today (Monday 11th May 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 33: Cassette.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 73 to 82)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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A lonely heart. A wandering eye. An empty stomach. A shoulder to cry on. This is what makes us us.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 32nd week today (Monday 4th May 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 32: Yellow Helicopters.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 62 to 70)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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Our black suns move erratically, like drunken bees, and each of them stings. Now more than ever we are full of blood and honey.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 30th week today (Monday 30th March 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 29: Subway.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 33 to 40)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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Does it even matter how many living things you touched today, or where they all even are now?
Welcome to Night Vale
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 29th week today (Monday 16th March 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 28: Summer Reading Program.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 24 to 30)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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It takes heart. It takes guts. It also takes cash. It just needs your payment immediately.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 31st week today (Monday 6th April 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 30: Dana.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 43 to 50)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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Mountains. Endless mountains. Peak after barren peak. And what lies restless in the shadowed valleys? I cannot say. I cannot say. 
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 28th week today (Monday 9th March 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 27: First Date.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 13 to 21)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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We report only the real, the semi-real, and the verifiably unreal.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 23rd week today (Monday 3rd February 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 23: Eternal Scouts.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | Mostly Void, Partially Stars (Pages 229 to 235)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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The sun has risen. You are awake. This symmetry is not without meaning.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 25th week today (Monday 10th February 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 24: The Mayor.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | Mostly Void, Partially Stars (Pages 238 to 245)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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Hang a map of a place you’ll never go on your living room wall. Draw new streets. Tear off bodies of water. Wait for news crews to arrive.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 22nd week today (Monday 20th January 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 21: A Memory of Europe.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | Mostly Void, Partially Stars (Pages 208 to 216)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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Trumpets playing soft jazz from out of the dark desert distance. They come tomorrow. It is too late for us.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 27th week today (Monday 2nd March 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 26: Faceless Old Woman.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe (Page 3 to 10)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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“You’ll be safe here,” says a whisper behind you.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 21st week today (Monday 13th Jaunary 2020). Welcome to a shiny new decade, listeners.
We will be listening to Episode 20: Poetry Week.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | Mostly Void, Partially Stars (Pages 194 to 205)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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A friendly desert community, where the sun is still hot, the moon still beautiful, and mysterious lights still pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 26th week today (Monday 17th February 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 25: One Year Later.
Happy new Night Vale year, listeners.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | Mostly Void, Partially Stars (Pages 248 to 255)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
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There’s a thin, semantic line separating weird and beautiful, and that line is covered in jellyfish.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Night Vale Rerun, a book club for a podcast about a friendly desert community, starts its 23rd week today (Monday 27th January 2020).
We will be listening to Episode 22: The Whispering Forest.
Enjoy the podcast at your own pace; we will be listening and discussing the episode for the entire week commencing from the above date. So, there’s absolutely no rush.
Chat about the latest episodes with fellow fans; we have a specific channel for those gods folks who manage to stay up-to-date with the show to discuss theories, conspiracies, and strange non-reality between the two. When joining in, be sure to use |spoiler| tags to avoid accidentally spoiling others. If you’re not all caught up, make sure to mute the channel to avoid potential spoiler-y notifications.
Let others know where you are with the story; a role system has been implemented to show where you are with your listening and (maybe literal) consumption of WNTV-associated media! Claim your Scout rank to mark which year you have listened to up to, in addition to your Summer Reading Survivor / Opera Attendee roles if you have read all the novels / listened to the live shows.
For the listeners: iTunes | YouTube | Podbay | Your podcast app of choice
For the readers: Transcript from cecilspeaks | Mostly Void, Partially Stars (Pages 219 to 226)
And last, but not least, join the Night Vale Rerun Discord!
Image sources: x, x, x, x
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