#y'know whispers by halsey? that's fucking it. that's IT

[therapy-talk]

Not sure what this is. I'm having a lot of thoughts and this probably doesn't capture anything that makes any sense but I do think I have to put it down somewhere and this is. Well.

FUCK what's it about the idea of burning everything down, fucking up good things, that is so tempting. Like. I don't know it's like I have the urge to hurt sometimes, to break friendships

Idk. I was gonna say "maybe it's just this specific friendship and maybe I deluded myself and it was never good or healthy," which, maybe I'm right, maybe it isn't. But I know it's not just this. It's also A, and E, a while back. It's me pulling back, or them pulling back and me not fighting it because... what? I'm not worth it? I'm hurting them anyways and when they finally see it and they're right to act on it?

Again, probably. I don't think I ever learned how to love without (self)destruction. I'm probably too clingy, and dependent. I'm not good at feeling things and/or being alone so I cling and I look to others to idk. Feel things for me? Tell me what to do? To model myself after instead of finding out who I am? Which, god, I must be exhausting to be around. (And still they keep me around. Even if we only talk in group settings anymore, they do keep me around and like. I can't figure out why they would.)

Keep thinking about a while back when our group was talking about the time when E and I first got close just before she joined this friend group, even further back, and they confessed they saw me as "a puppy just following her around and withdrawing from them" and ouch. That hurt because looking back I can see how true that is. That I was so terrified of being alone in classes, or in general, and she was the only one with all the same ones as I had. That I did the same thing with Y in elementary school. Which I probably did with Ace as well before that without realizing.

Idk. Maybe that's why I feel like withdrawing and isolating every once in a while. That I feel like I'm doing it again and that just not having any contact will somehow. Idk. Fix it? Am I hoping they'll come back and realize I'm worth it? That they still like me?

I'm not terrified of being alone as much, now, I think. Maybe that's delusional. Maybe I still am. I do think it's inevitable though. I'll end up alone again and again and maybe mom was right, no one will ever help you and you'll have to do it all alone and take care of yourself. Maybe she meant me in particular instead of like. People in general.

Maybe it's me being so convinced I'm unloveable that withdrawing and telling myself I don't mind is me trying to control the hurt. That in going "ok so I won't initiate conversation anymore," I'm saying "I don't care if they don't want me anymore, because in this way it's my choice to give them the choice and they can't say my behavior pushed them away" which is probably also bullshit in that not putting energy into a friendship probably DOES push them away.

Like. What's the deal with feeling like this? I just want to start a fight. Like a big shouting match "I DON'T CARE AND YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST WALK AWAY" fight. An "I HATE YOU—I'm gonna say the most hurtful things I don't even mean so you'll leave me alone" fight. A "this isn't even fucking about you but I don't know how to deal with all this fucking pain and I'm scared I'll hurt you with it so please just leave before I ruin you" fight. Like that will somehow fix it. Like that will stop me from feeling so fucking empty. I feel so fucking empty and alone. I want something to fucking BREAK. I want something else than this "it should feel good and i should feel loved because I have this close-knit group of friends for 10 years now but I don't, I don't feel it right now they're probably lying they'll be glad once I'm gone" loop that keeps going through my head.

I want to be able to fucking ask for help. To tell them "I don't feel loved right now. I have this fucking pain I'm dealing with that I don't know how to talk about and I need comfort." To tell them "my love language is touch, I think, and no one's giving me big warm bone-crushing hugs anymore."

(Fuck I think that's it fuck fuck fuck)

Maybe I should just get used to that. I know and respect that my uni friend group isn't a huggy friend group, and I should just accept that my other friend group is very huggy but like. That'll vary too. That my parents won't hug me like I'm fucking 5 anymore, because I'm not fucking 5 anymore. That I should grow up and be fine without comforting touch. That maybe I'll find someone along the way to fill this fucking hole.

#this is SO unhealthy i know i know don't even bother #i just. i don't even know what i want. do i want to be completely alone so i'm the only one who can hurt myself? #anyways. my mom's not giving me big hugs anymore for a while now. my friend who sometimes does probably won't anymore #that's me interpreting something she said today wrong probably. that's me being selfish. that's me not knowing context #can't help but feel like she thinks i'm. idk. a creep? #idk hugs never last as long as I wish they would. i always feel like something gets torn out of my chest when people let go before im ready #i can't cling on. i know that. but idk i just want to feel. grounded? held? loved? #so just pushing people away seems easier so then i don't have to worry about this. then there's no one to cling to and hurt #and then they can't hurt me either by pulling away either physically or emotionally #even my cat isn't a cuddly cat and shies away from touch #GOD sorry i feel fucking empty #y'know whispers by halsey? that's fucking it. that's IT #therapy talks #now i gotta be social and watch a film with my mom n sibling when i just want to cry

[topofmythighs]

Hey love! That tiktok kiss prompt is too cute. Can I request the hello kiss with s9 Dean, she/her pronouns? Thanks so much! X

thank you for sending a request my way!

prompt list to request from is here

the troubles of lovin’

dean winchester x fem!reader

rundown: the mark of cain fucks dean up, reader is desperate to feel like her dean is back because the one she’s holding onto isn’t the one she promised forever to

warning: canon level gore, maybe angst?, fluff

word count: 1,542

important notes: fuck the darkness, fuck that whole plot line, i hate her no matter what. so yeah, i skip over some Pretty Important Plot Stuff but that is simply not my domain! we jazz it up around here, baby! also, EW petnames, amiright? winnie for "winchester" and tiggs for tigger because winnie the pooh is cute ok moving on enjoy

my masterlist

loving dean with the mark of cain is a borderline impossible feat.

when you first started dating, you agreed to stay with him on the promise that if he ever killed people, you would leave. you didn’t want anything to do with being a hunter, but your love for dean was too strong, making you incapable of staying away from him.

and dean never enjoyed killing people. monsters, sure, but never people. but dean with the mark isn’t your dean. it squeezes your lungs and rips apart your heart to know that you’re in love with a killer, a demon - dean, but not dean.

sam has been as supportive as he can be for you as you figure everything out with dean, and you try to reciprocate it, but it’s exhausting. everything is mentally and physically and emotionally exhausting, and it takes everything in you not to run away from the bunker and never look back for the winchesters.

but you know deep down that your dean is still there. he’s feeling guilty, he’s feeling angry, he’s feeling remorseful, and this is the assumption that makes you stick around.

when sam and dean arrive back from a hunt, their clothes are blood stained and eyes heavy.

“what happened?” you ask, getting up promptly from the library table.

“hi,” sam says, exasperated. he shrugs his coat off and allows his duffle bag fall to the floor, wrapping you in a tight hug. you hug back confused but grateful for the contact, seeing dean slip into the hallway without a word. 

“what happened, sammy?” you ask quietly, pulling back to look into his eyes. they’re shiny, tears threatening to spill over.

“dean’s not okay,” he whispers, lip quivering. “there were so many people, dead.”

when you usher sam to the library table, he begins to tell you about it all. claire’s abduction by some randy guy who tries to use her to pay off his debt, sam, cass, and dean saving her, then dean mercilessly slaying bodies - human bodies - without a hint of remorse afterwards. 

sam begs you, holding his hands in yours, to convince dean to get rid of the mark, even to give it to sam himself. you shake your head to this.

sam's eyes are glossy and red, and his face is illuminated by the lights around the library. "please, fix my brother."

you squeeze his hands one last time and kiss the top of his head. "lemme make you a tea, then get some rest, sammy. we'll figure this out."

you make two mugs of camomile tea, one black for dean, and one with a hint of almond milk for sam. you bring sam's tea to his room and place it on his nightstand for him to have after his shower, and you bring dean's tea to him in his room.

even though you and dean had been together for so many years, he insisted that you have your own room in the bunker.

"you need your, y'know, girl space," dean commented, putting boxes of your things into a separate room.

you scoffed, "oh please. that's just your excuse to decorate your room with guns and deer heads."

he winked at you, "you're smart, sweetheart."

you yearned for your dean to come back. your hands were shakey, but you knocked on his bedroom door.

"yeah?" his voice gruff and raspy.

"hi winnie," you said as sweet as possible. "i brought you a tea."

he turns his head to look at you standing in the doorway, the distance between you two eliciting a small pull on his heart.

you notice his stiff and poor posture as he sits on his brown duvet-ed bed. his hair has clearly been ruffled by his hands.

he smiles small at you. "thanks, tiggs."

you shrug with a tiny smirk, making your way over to him, setting his tea on his wooden nightstand as you did for sam, and sitting next to him. "is this okay?"

he nods, and you rest your head on his left shoulder. it was hard to love dean with the mark because of his actions, but it was harder to stop loving him because the outside was still your dean. his shoulder was still hard but warm, his chest still rose and fell at a calming pace, and he still smelled like musk, campfires, and vanilla cigars.

"sammy tell you about today?" he asks, voice still gritty.

you nod against his shoulder and gently take his hand from his thigh. "yeah, he did, winnie."

"i'm so sorry, tiggs," dean says, and you swear you can hear some kind of underlying guilt. he squeezes your hand tight.

"i know, dean. i don't want to say it's okay, but i'm not angry with you," you whisper. you fear that the conversation will evoke emotions that are too strong for you to handle, so you suggest he tries his tea before it gets too cold. he nods to this and drinks his tea, making a comment about how the heat of it almost makes him feel normal again.

"promise me something," you begin, moving your head to try and gain his attention from his peripheral vision. he looks at you, green eyes dull and full of ache. "when this shit is over, as soon as it's over, we get rid of that fucking thing. i don't care who you give it to, i want my dean back."

his pulls you into his chest, silently agreeing. he knows that he doesn't have the right words or the courage to promise you something like that verbally, so he opts for comforting you in any way he can.

before it gets better, it gets worse. dean is murdered, brought back to life, but not human life - demon life. rowena double-crosses the winchesters, and everything is shit. but with some negotiation, time, and begging, the witch removes the mark from dean.

it's a frigid october evening when rowena removes the mark. you had fallen asleep in dean's bed, the memory foam squeezing into your sides and creating just the right amount of tension to feel like you were being held. you were dressed in just underwear and a flannel of dean's that you took from his laundry bin a few days ago. you felt chills roam your body, wishing dean was with you. sleeping had been hard recently, and nightmares have wracked your brain, so when you heard a shrill scream, you just thought it was a dream. a rough call of your name from sam woke you up, and you twisted out of the memory foam cave as fast as possible, pulling your jeans over your legs as you run out of the bedroom to the library.

"what is happening?!" you yell, seeing an eery white light loom from dean's arm, a satisfied looking rowena, and an emotional sam.

"you're welcome, darling," the witch comments, eliciting an even more confused look from you.

"rowena, uh," sam starts, sniffling. "she, uh, the mark. it's gone."

your head whips around to dean, who looks to be in pain, but you run over to him quickly and wrap your arms around his neck. "my winnie," you whisper, tears falling.

"hi baby," he whispers back, wrapping his arms around you. you hear rowena guide sam to the kitchen, and then it's just you and dean. he stands up, stilling holding you, and squeezes harder when he feels your tears making his shirt wet. "tiggs, c'mon, it's okay now."

after what felt like forever apart, it was you and your dean again. you felt your heart swell, knowing that everything was finally okay. "please kiss me," you say, looking up at dean with doe eyes.

he smiles at you, cupping your neck with his palms, fingers pressing into your cheeks. he kisses you deeply, enjoying the first kiss the two of you have shared in a while. his lips are rough against yours, but it's nothing to complain about. you're just glad you get to tangle yourself around him, scents mixing together and bodies warm.

dean’s large hands grab at your hips, lifting you off the ground, letting you wrap your legs around him. your grip on him is still tight as you kiss, one arm wrapped around his shoulder and your other hand cupping his face. this felt like your first kiss all over again, and your heart feels like it’s finally healing.

when you pull away to look into his eyes, dean smiles at you, hugging you tight and spinning you around while kissing your head. you giggle loud and tell him to cut it out, and he laughs before he kisses you again.

“got my girl back,” he says when he pulls back. “missed you so much.”

“missed you more than anything, dean. i’m so glad you’re okay.”

you and dean spend the rest of the night in his room cuddled up together on his comfy bed. you’re watching one of the middle harry potter movies, but focusing more on holding each other. you’re nervous dean will slip out of your fingers, so you sleep with his shirt balled up in your hands and on top of him.

loving dean without the mark of cain was a borderline inherit trait.

#sam winchester imagine #sam winchester x oc #sam winchester x y/n #dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #sam winchester #sam winchester x gender neutral reader #sam winchester x reader #sam x you #baby sam has my heart #dean winchester x gender neutral reader #dean x you #sam and dean #dean winchester x you #supernatural fic #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester x female!reader

[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs: 4.28.2007 & 4.29.2017

the songs that debuted on the billboard chart this week and ten years ago this week.

4.28.2007

67) "Thnks fr th Mmrs," Fall Out Boy

The song has everything that's missing from "This Ain't a Scene." It's about something that is a thing, it's coherently put together, it has maybe the best chorus Fall Out Boy ever wrote (don't hold me to that), it's actually clever and not just trying hard to be clever (though it is trying very, very hard), and it has that breakdown, that "I only think in the form of crunching numbers" over the acoustic guitar that gets me every single time. This is the song that put me on the path to liking Fall Out Boy again after a couple of disappointing years. It’s what helped me accept that the adorable young boys of Take This to Your Grave were gone, but the confident snarklords had much to offer.

74) "Summer Love," Justin Timberlake

"Ridin' in the drop top/With the top down/Saw you switchin' lanes girl." "So chillin' in the front seat/In the back seat/I'm drivin', cruisin'/Fast lane, switchin' lanes." Which horrible line about switching lanes is from this 2007 hit, and which is from Rebecca Black's "Friday," the song everyone hated? What does switchin' lanes even mean in this context? No I'm not going to pay attention to the rest of this song, the rest of it probably sucks also as well, I wanna harp on this first line. Like how do you know a girl is sexy from the way she merges on the highway? Or are you in the club? If you're in the club, how on earth are you in a drop top with the top down, like what would that be a metaphor for? I can see how switchin' lanes would be the girl flirting with all sorts of boys, but what on earth is your drop top. Are you shirtless? Are you wearing an open leather jacket? I don't, ugh, all of your songs are bad, literally your entire catalogue infuriates me.

75) "The Story," Brandi Carlile

is there a better moment in music than when this song plugs in. that's a serious question. how many moments in other songs are better than "i climbed across the mountain tops/SWAM ALL ACROSS THE OCEAN BLUE." Like that was such a miracle the first time I heard it, it sounds like this sort of pretty song I might usually skip but stuck with for some reason, and then it goes absolutely insane, like first those drums come in and it's like, "Oh, this is more plugged in than I anticipated!" AND THEN WE'RE ON A ROCKET INTO THE FUCKING SUN. This is the only alt-country song that turns all the way up, and it has never stopped being a miracle.

84) "Earth Intruders," Bjork

/smiles politely /sorts gently into the 'not for me' pile there, there, dear sweet. you and i both know your home is not with me.

86) "Que Hiceste," Jennifer Lopez

Yo! So, the Jennifer Lopez Spanish-language track was dope as hell, which I didn't see coming. A thread through 2017 has been how dope the Latin pop songs are, and this is everything I want, something over-dramatic that I don't 100% understand but is funky enough to get into. It kind of tracks why it took me this long to hear it, I think the public was over J.Lo in 2007 and probably treated her Spanish-language album like a joke, but y'know what, I was wrong to not take her seriously, and my world is better with this song in it. Hey. Hey, everyone. It’s me, the man with music opinions, saying he likes a J.Lo song more than a Bjork song. Please give my opinions credence.

91) "Umbrella," Rihanna ft./Jay-Z

This is a towering achievement worthy of the onslaught of thinkpieces about its lasting impact sure to pop up on your favorite culture websites over the next couple of weeks. This is also the worst Jay-Z verse. At least the verse on "Monster" is stupid enough to be memorable. What even is that thing at the top of the song? How come I couldn't find an upload that cut his part out? It's literally at the beginning of the song and adds nothing, Jay-Z doesn't even ad-lib at all for the rest of the song, you could remove that and miss nothing. I'm focusing on the negative when this is one of the best pop songs there ever was. (It won't be #1 on the Top 20 because SAD INDIE SONGS YOU GUYZ, but it'll be at the forefront of the pop game.) Bless whoever heard this song and thought it should go to the girl who made "Pon de Replay," who heard "Pon de Replay" and heard the ability to carry this track home.

94) "I'm Throwed," Paul Wall ft./Jermaine Dupri

All these mid-aughts Houston rap singles have been way better than I expected. Also, I can't tell if "I'm a sharpshooter like Steve Kerr" was an outdated boast in 2007, or if it only seems outdated because Steve Kerr is a notable head coach in the National Basketball Association. Kerr was GM of the Suns in '07, wasn't he? Like I get his name rhymes, but you've gotta be able to name a more current basketball player than Steve Kerr, dude. Steve Novak was on the Rockets that season, literally his only NBA skill was the three, maybe try to squeeze him in there?

100) "It's Me Bitches," Swizz Beatz

it's disappointing that swizz beatz gave this beat to himself, but it's also perfectly understandable that no one else wanted to try to handle it. also if anyone wanted to hear the opposite of "Lady Marmalade," the remix features lil' wayne, r. kelly, and jadakiss, it features wayne and r. doing jamaican accents, and it starts with the words "voulez-vous couchez avec moi bitches." literally, the opposite of "Lady Marmalade."

The in-progress Top 20 for 2007: 20) “Kiss the G 20) "Que Hiciste," by Jennifer Lopez (4.28.2007) 19) "When I See U," by Fantasia (4.21.2007) 18) "Movin' On," by Elliott Yamin (3.17.2007) 17) "U + Ur Hand," by P!nk (1.13.2007) 16) "Doe Boy Fresh," by Three 6 Mafia ft./Chamillionaire (1.20.2007) 15) "Breath," by Breaking Benjamin (4.14.2007) 14) "Stolen," by Dashboard Confessional (4.21.2007) 13) "Beautiful Liar," by Beyonce & Shakira (3.31.2007) 12) "Cupid's Chokehold," by Gym Class Heroes ft./Patrick Stump (1.13.2007) 11) "The River," by Good Charlotte ft./M. Shadows & Synyster Gates (2.10.2007) 10) "Say OK," by Vanessa Hudgens (2.17.2007) 9) "Alyssa Lies," by Jason Michael Carroll (1.13.2007) 8) "Get Buck," by Young Buck (4.14.2007) 7) "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going," by Jennifer Hudson (1.13.2007) 6) "Thnks fr th Mmrs," by Fall Out Boy (4.28.2007) 5) "Candyman," by Christina Aguilera (1.13.2007) 4) "Because of You," by Ne-Yo (3.17.2007) 3) "Umbrella," by Rihanna ft./Jay-Z (4.28.2007) 2) "Dashboard," by Modest Mouse (2.17.2007) 1) "The Story," by Brandi Carlile (4.28.2007) I think we all understand that “Kiss the Girl” is the Top 20, and that there is no reason to bother reviewing 2007 after last week, as “Kiss the Girl” was perfect.

4.29.2017

4) "Sign of the Times," by Harry Styles

...I can't deny that this is an ambitious song, and I cannot deny that it is focused in its ambition. If forced to make the choice, I would take this over ZAYN mumbling any day of the week. But you also made me listen to five and a half minutes of some misguided nonsense. This feels like a song you can sell once you've proven you can deliver the basics. This is the eleventh track of the rock opera you get to make once you have established enough credibility to sell a rock opera, the dark night of the soul a track or two before the climax of your career’s defining work, and it doesn't work as the first post-boy-band single. I can't believe this exists. Think of all the people who had to listen to this and sign off on it. "Yeah, a five-and-a-half minute epic ballad, that'll get the kids talking. That'll launch this kid into the stratosphere!" And, well, #4! hey! alright!, but fucking Liam could have a top-ten single tomorrow if he dropped a new track, #4 means nothing. I salute the ambition. I find nothing to applaud anywhere else.

50) "Now or Never," by Halsey

it's going to sound weird to critique halsey for lacking a sense of urgency on this song when that "hit the sin" song had ALL THE URGENCY but like as pleasant as it was to hear her whisper over a beat that bleeped and blooped agreeably, this song is called "now or never?" like this is the only time i've heard a halsey song where she seemed calm. maybe i just don't know what i want out of a halsey song. maybe this is Great and i'm just committed to not seeing what's Great in here. but like of all the songs to not overdramatize, you pick the one with an ultimatum! help me figure you out, dawg!

74) "Unforgettable," by French Montana ft./Swae Lee

This was fine! I have a thousand nitpicks -- ft./Swae Lee? FT./?! He was the entire song! -- but they, more than usual, add up to nothing here, because I enjoyed myself! Not the best song, not a song painting outside any lines, a song that'll prolly sound dated in 10 years (ah yes, 2017, when we revived dancehall for some reason), but a four minute ride through a nice part of Music Town!

79) "Everyday We Lit," by YFN Lucci ft./PnB Rock

The YouTube description informs the this is off the album Get the Nut, and my entire opinion of this song is colored by the fact of its origin. Fuck this. Like I know I'm supposed to judge the song and nothing else, but that album title tells me more about who this person is than anything on this world possibly could. And since we're talking about song-related ephemera, we've got dudes in rap videos wearing Toon Squad jerseys. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I kind of wish he'd take this more seriously. You're on this song about how awesome life is, but life's not so awesome that you can't participate in irony? I don't get this choice you have made.

89) "Cake," by Flo Rida & 99 Percent

this is just a two and a half minute party jam about fucking. bless this song. no frills, nothing overly complicated, ya just start it up, there's maybe half a metaphor and a fuckton of "whoa-ohs" and we're done. flo rida is the reigning king of trash pop rap, and i would listen to this 40 times before i ever listened to more life again.

92) "Bar at the End of the World," by Kenny Chesney

This sounds like it was designed to be the soundtrack to your CVS shopping experience. CVS might be too urban for this song. This sounds like it's going to be the song that plays every single time you walk into a gas station in a rural area for the rest of your life. They delivered this to every convenience store out in the sticks, they assessed their primary music delivery system and dropped off the cassette or the CD or maybe they had to hex the radio, but this song has been delivered, and the proprietors know the drill. You will be on your way up north for a cousin's wedding, fill up the tank and maybe get a Cherry Coke and some Twizzlers, still got a bit of a drive ahead of you and hey what the hell it's a vacation have some sugar, and you will hear this song, because it is the only song you can hear. You'll hear precisely 71 seconds and won't mind or notice any of it, meaning the song will have done its job.

97) "Weak," by AJR

So this is an anthem about saying "fuck it" and making bad choices, which sounds like it'd be right up my alley? But I don't dig it, and I'm trying to nail down what I don't like about it. Something about this track irks me, and I'm like one word away from figuring out what that is. It's not the fact it kind of reminds me of "Love in This Club," though that doesn't help. Maybe it's just too precious? It's like the first draft of a Fun. song, the outline of where a song could go before they add specific details about the relationship and what makes giving into it such a bad idea. I don't leave this song knowing anything about these dudes, other than the fact they want desperately for other people to like them. Cloying. Cloying! That's the ticket! They want very badly for you to feel sympathy for their plight, but they don't want to be too honest about themselves, lest you find something unrelatable. It’s a song about a damaged person by people who aren’t open about their own damage.

99) "If I Told You," by Darius Rucker

this how you do me shane mcnally. this was the one thing i was looking forward to, and it's this. whatever. it's fine. what a dumb week.

100) "Flatliner," by Cole Swindell ft./Dierks Bentley

maybe it's not the chillest thing to praise flo rida for making garbage pop/rap but chide these yutzes for making what is basically the same song, but

The Top 20 for this week is the same as the Top 20 was last week because 2017 didn’t even fucking try. 20) "Tin Man," by Miranda Lambert (4.22) 19) "Everyday," by Ariana Grande ft./Future (3.4) 18) "Everybody," by Logic (4.22) 17) "Guys My Age," by Hey Violet (2.11) 16) "Heatstroke," by Calvin Harris ft./Young Thug, Pharrell Williams & Ariana Grande (4.22) 15) "Yeah Boy," Kelsea Ballerini (3.4) 14) "You Look Good," by Lady Antebellum (4.22) 13) "Selfish," by Future ft./Rihanna (3.18) 12) "Slide," by Calvin Harris ft./Frank Ocean & Migos (3.18) 11) "Now & Later," by Sage the Gemini (2.25) 10) "It Ain't Me," by Kygo x Selena Gomez (3.4) 9) "Craving You," by Thomas Rhett ft./Maren Morris (4.22) 8) "That's What I Like," by Bruno Mars (3.4) 7) "The Heart Part 4," by Kendrick Lamar (4.15) 6) "Chanel," by Frank Ocean ft./A$AP Rocky (4.1) 5) "Run Up," by Major Lazer ft./PARTYNEXTDOOR & Nicki Minaj (2.18) 4) "Green Light," by Lorde (3.18) 3) "Despacito," by Luis Fonsi ft./Daddy Yankee (2.4) 2) "Issues," by Julia Michaels (2.11) 1) "iSpy," by KYLE ft./Lil Yachty (1.14) Hey: “Issues” is #12 on the real chart this week! That’s cool!

Who won? hahahahahhahahahahahaha 2007: 3 2017: 2 Though, hey, at least this week didn’t have as much Chainsmokers as I feared! That tally still doesn’t really reflect how badly 2007 is outpacing 2017, though. The 2007 Top 20 is officially nuts, like, “U + Ur Hand” at #17? But it might remain static through next week, that 2007 Top 20, 2007 looks to be leaving the door wide open with next week’s offerings. Do I think 2017 can notch another empty victory? TOTALLY, DUDE. (Foreshadowing.)