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realfuurikuuri · 5 years

Text

For Fox Sake

MMHOPH Missing Arm! AU fic Chapter 2

WC: 2,888

AN: Again, made using the MissingArm!AU created by @spookylovesboba And it’s now on Ao3 if any of y’alls want so read it there. I reccomend you do becuase chapter 1 had some editing issues that were fixed. Writing this chapter was fun. I like Rufus and Reggie. They force things to be less about fights and more about words. A song rec for this chapter would be Won’t Get Fooled Again - The Who (the cultured among you will notice that it’s also the theme song to CSI: Miami). Will tamble in tags some more. AO3 Link

Mao Mao sat on a bench, nursing a cup of coffee that had started to become tepid. Adorabat and Badgerclops were there with him. They weren’t doing much either. They tapped away on their games without a care in the world. He thinks it was called Mini-mons, or something. Mao Mao would have reminded them that they were on patrol if the day wasn’t so slow. The only thing he did was give Pigguns another driving ticket, which he does every day, so it wasn’t anything but routine at this point.

In his boredom, Mao Mao’s mind began to wander. The first of which being Jǐngtì. He probably went back to meet up with Tanya. Hopefully, she could give the kid the talk Mao Mao couldn’t. The next thought that passed his mind was the valley itself. It was a strange place. He knew that it was guarded by the Ruby Pure Heart. Did the thing have to do with the sweetipies? They were strange creatures. Despite their age, they all seemed like children. Destructive, naive, gullible, children. Even the ones who he assumed were older were still flagrantly immature. Snugglemane and Camille being prime examples.

“Hey, Badgerclops,” he said.

“What do you want Daddy Issues I’m doing -Oh C’mon not Dirtmon,” he said, tapping buttons on the game even harder.

“You think the Ruby Pure Heart has something to do with the sweetipies?”

“Elaborate.”

“I mean do you think it has to do with why they’re all so… immature… and feral?”

“Nah, dude I think that was just the barrier thingy. No problems; no need to learn, right?”

“I suppose that makes sense.”

“You need to find something to do. You always get so questiony when you’re antsy.”

“I would if there was something to do.”

“Play Mini-mons with us?”

“No.”

“Then go find some sweetiepies or something. All they do is commit crimes, to be honest. Shouldn’t Puggin’s be speeding around now?”

He couldn’t say Badgerclops was wrong about that. Mao Mao got up and threw away his coffee. “No he gets his daily ticket at 4:00, but you have a point. I’ll see you around.”

“Okay dude I’ll be… losing to this child. Get me a pie if you’re going to the bakery.”

Mao Mao almost told him to go get it himself when he sighed and decided to go along with it.

* * *

Rufus could barely believe his luck. He sat at the table watching Muffin stack all sorts of valuables on the table. Golden coins, priceless gems, paintings, and a menagerie of riches that would fit a king. He was eyeing a golden watch on this ugly little mouse’s wrist, searching his head for a con, when the thing walked up to him. He was eyeing a golden watch on this ugly little mouse’s wrist, searching his head for a con, when the thing walked up to him. Somehow Reggie managed to pull a scam out of nowhere that the creature actually believed.

Just an hour ago he was looking for yet another town to go to where his face was unknown to run another scam, only to find a surprise kingdom that wasn’t on any maps. Even better than that was that everyone here was dumb as bricks! Rufus kicked back to watch more savings be put on the table when a strange cat walked in. To be fair, the black cat only looked strange relative to the technicolor weirdos.

“Can I get another Everyberry...” The cat’s voice died out as it caught sight of Rufus Regg and the stack of treasures.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed,” Muffins, what are you doing?”

“Well, I was making some pies when these two nice gentlemen come in. They looked like the wanted to talk to me, so I go up to them and it turns out their distant relatives who are looking to set up a branch of the company here. They just need some investment to set up shop, and well you don’t say no to family,” Muffin said.

“You're savings,” he did a double-take looking at the stack of treasures before shaking it off,” that… comes later. Muffin, right now you need to stop giving them their money.”

Rufus began to wonder if things were starting to sour.

“Why not help family?”

“Muffins you are a yellow mouse. That is a raccoon and fox.”

“And?”

The cat looked like he was about to strangle the mouse when he took a deep breath,” listen, they aren’t your family. They’re scam artists taking your money.”

“A preposterous claim, under what authority do you have to make those allegations,” Rufus asked with all the feigned bravado he could muster.

“The crown’s.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“I’m the sheriff.”

* * *

Mao Mao watched the fox’s eyes go wide as he forced himself to wear a smile. “Ahhh, I see. Well, you must be a busy person, as are we, so you must understand if we have to cut this engagement short. We have places to be you know.”

“You’re both under arrest.”

“Run!”

Rufus quickly grabbed his companion and bolted out the door.

Mao Mao checked his watch. It was 3:50. If he did this quick he should be able to give Pigguns his ticket. After giving them a fair head start before he crashed through the storefront to give chase. It was pretty disappointing, to be honest. The grifters weren’t particularly fast or smart. They made the horrible choice to run right to the kingdom gates. Mao Mao knew twenty different shortcuts that could have put him ahead of them, but he didn’t need to use any of them. He checked his watch; It was 3:58. Mao Mao picked up the pace, closing in on them at blinding speed.

He drew his sword and leaped forward. He screeched to a halt at the last intersection. Instead of giving chase, he rested his arm on Geraldine, and began to write on his notepad.

“Ha-Ha! Yes! We did it Regg. We’re free! We’re-”

Rufus learned why the sheriff stopped when Slim-Pigguns careened down the road. Mao Mao calmy stuck yet another ticket onto Pigguns’ car as it zoomed by, and waited. When the smoke cleared the fox was kneeling next to his roadkill companion. Unfortunate that it didn’t hit both.

What a great day! He captured the scammers and gave Pigguns his ticket all at once. Whoever said a “ bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”could go get fucked. For once in his life, Mao Mao was feeling proud of himself. That and his little joke must’ve been why he laughed. He laughed, and he did it quite loudly.

Slowly, Sweetipies began to crowd around, murmuring amongst themselves.

The sweetipies pushed past Mao Mao, crowding around the raccoon. “Poor thing, who did this to you?”

A wicked glint ignited in the foxe’s eye,” it was the sheriff. He did this.”

“Oh my god, you think anyone is actually going to believe... that.”

The mob turned to face Mao Mao, moving like a single angry creature.

“What a monster,” a sweetiepie said

“I knew he’d lose it eventually,” said another.

“Oh, come on! You can’t actually believe him!”

“What a horrid man.”

The crowd began to close in on Mao Mao.

“That’s preposterous. I would never do something like that… without reason, at least. Either way, you can’t just believe a couple of strangers right?”

“I knew we shouldn’t have made him sheriff.”

“Woah, woah, woah, that’s enough,” Badgerclops said over is police siren hand to get through the crowd.

“What on earth happened here?”

“The sheriff attacked this innocent man.”

He and Adorabat looked over to the Reggie then back to Mao Mao.

“You seriously can’t believe them,” he said.

Adorabat sucked air in through her teeth,” Badgerclops, should I tell him?”

“Now. Now let’s not make assumptions,” Badgerclops said before immediately huddling down and speaking in a whisper. “What the fuck, dude? I know I already have bags packed, but geez.”

“I didn't do it! It was Slim Pigguns who did this!”

“Can you prove it,” the fox choked out.

“Prove it?” Mao Mao marched through the crowd, grabbing, shoving and tossing Sweetipies out of the way, grabbing the fox by the collar. “Of course, I can prove it. Its what happened!”

“Could you prove it in a court of law?”

“Sure!”

“Then we will. I sue the Pure Heart Valley Sheriff’s Department.”

“What,” Mao Mao, Badgerclops and Adorabat screamed in unison.

“No. In fact, we’ll sue the Pure Heart Valley itself. We’ll sure for everything it owns.”

Mao Mao and the three of them quickly formed a team-planning hug. “He can’t actually sue the entire valley for everything it owns, can he,” Adorabat asked.

“Don’t ask me. Ask Mao Mao.”

“Well… they might. The article that relates to suits against the kingdom doesn’t exactly put a limit on what can be demanded.”

“Don’t worry Daddy Issues. I already got our bags packed and-”

“We are not running!”

“Why not, I don’t really wanna be here when you lose the case.”

“I won’t lose the case because I didn’t hurt him.”

“You sure,” they asked.

“Yes, I’m sure. He got run over by Slim Pigguns. I didn't hurt him. Why is that so hard to believe?”

“Because that would be ridiculously on-brand for you. It's not an ‘if’ but ‘when’. I already have bags packed for when it happens.”

“You have what now?”

“Nothing. Anyways, if you want to challenge them then we go to court,” Badgerclops said.

“I’ll handle the case and you... try not to be yourself. Or at least don’t be yourself in front of the sweetipies.”

“What?”

“Oh! Oh! Oh! What do I do,” Adorabat asked.

“You’ll be his PR,” Badgerclops explained.

“Yay!”

Mao Mao began to consider if it was time to use those emergency packs.

* * *

Mao Mao didn’t know if the sweetipies had any foresight or common sense. Rufus could literally sue the valley for everything it owns, and for some reason, the sweetipies were taking Rufus’ side. The fact that Snugglemane was in control of the proceedings was the shit icing on top of the shit cake. Mao Mao tapped his fingers against the table. The court was taking too long to start. The jury was seated and the spectators mumbled amongst themselves. Snugglemane fiddled with the white wig he was wearing over his usual one. Rufus and Reggie weren’t here yet. Badgerclops wasn’t present either. Only Adorabat was here, which wouldn’t be much help since she’s his “PR” and a child.

Everyone turned when the doors opened. Rufus rolled his friend in on a stretcher. Despite the obvious greed in his eyes, Mao Mao could see genuine concern for his friend. Granted, that didn't stop him from wanting to see the fox on a stretcher as well.

“Oh good, the prosecution is finally here. Let's get this thing started,” the king said banging his gavel.

“But my defense isn’t here yet,” Mao Mao objected.

Adorabat took the stage. “Don’t worry,” she said,” I got this.”

“Aren’t you like... Six?”

“Seven, actually.”

Snugglemane considered it for a moment before banging his gavel. “Good enough for me. The Prosecution has the stand.”

Rufus stepped up. Mao Mao thought it was weird for Rufus to be speaking for himself, then again it's not like the valley has any lawyers.

Rufus cleared his throat, speaking in a pained voice,” Thank you, your… Honor? Majesty?”

“Call me both.”

“Alright, you're Honorific Majesty.”

The king giggled; the sheriff rolled his eyes.

“As you all know,” he began,” I had come to the Pure Heart Valley to visit a relative. Muffin, a distant cousin of mine-”

“Oh, c’mon. You are a fox. Muffin is literally a yellow mouse,” Mao Mao interrupted.

“Silence,” the king demanded with his gavel. “The prosecution has the floor.”

“As I was saying. I came to the valley because I’d come across some financial troubles. I’ve been trying to start a business of mine. A newspaper in fact. Everything was going smoothly till that brigand appeared.”

The crowd hissed and booed at Mao Mao. The king didn’t bother to stop that interruption.

“This foul creature chased me all the way through town. When he finally caught up with me. He proceeded to do… this to my friend.”

The crowd winced and ooed in sympathy for that awful fox.

“A heartbreaking tale,” the King sniffled. “Does the defense have anything they want to say?”

“Yes,” Adorabat said.

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“Then speak your piece.”

“Um.. line?”

Mao Mao pinched the bridge of his nose.

* * *

Mao Mao did not expect much from a defense set up by a seven-year-old, but by god, it was somehow worse. Adorabat was naive and easy to manipulate. Rufus found it easy to set up leading questions.

“Do you think the sheriff is responsible for his actions?”

“Ehm… yes?”

“Is he one of those hateful people willing to attack others?”

“I suppose.”

“Does his tendency to attack first without asking questions often bring others to harm?”

“King, I object,” Mao Mao interrupted.

“Say the full titles.”

Mao Mao swallowed his fury. “I object to his questions, your Honorific Majesty.”

“On what grounds?”

“Well, the fact that they’re all loaded questions and Adorabat actually being a seven-year-old toddler.”

“That’s no grounds for an objection. You elected her to be your defense of your own accord. It conflicts with no rules or laws.”

“Laws here make no sense, though. The fact that you’re suing an entire county for everything it owns is proof enough.”

Rufus and Mao Mao began to argue more and more. Snugglemane pounded his gavel demanding order, but no one listened. Things just got louder and louder, wilder and wilder until Rufus and Mao Mao were grappling on the floor of the courtroom.

“I’ll tear your eye out you armless bastard,” Rufus yelled.

“I’d like to see a corpse try,” he responded.

They only calmed down when the guards pried them apart When the guards finally pried them apart they were both left beaten and bloody. Mao Mao punched Rufus in the stomach; Rufus bashed him in the nose, along with the countless bumps and bruises they shared. Although, Rufus was definitely worse for wear. His left arm was twisted in all the wrong ways. Mao Mao couldn’t even feel proud of that. His head was throbbing and there was this awful hum.

No the hum wasn’t in his head. More heads began to turn when the noise got louder and louder. It was a hum, that grew into a rumble; a rumble so loud he courtroom began to shake. It sounded like a car… no, it was a car. Mao Mao quickly shook himself free of the guards, grabbing Adorabat as the wall caved in with a mighty crash.

Mao Mao waved the smoke away, clutching Adorabat to his chest. “You alright,” he asked.

“I’m fine,” she coughed out.

Despite the damage, no one seemed to be hurt. Pinky was laughing maniacally, so the sweetipies were fine, the king peeked his head from behind the podium, and unfortunately, the grifters were still alive. Despite the car belonging to Slim Pigguns Badgerclops stepped out first. He took a few tentative steps before he threw up his lunch. Slim Pigguns stepped out more concerned for his car than anything else.

“What is the meaning of this,” the king growled.

“Well… god damn… that was horrifying,” Badgerclops heaved in between breaths,” I have proof that… Mao Mao didn’t… do it.”

“What’s the proof?”

“Witness... testimony. I call to the stand… Slim Pigguns!”

The fox’s eyes went wide.

“Hm?” Pigguns poked his head up, not even paying attention to the court.

“Mr.Pigguns, could you tell us what happened when you ran over the raccoon?”

“Yeah. I was going for my daily drive, when I got near the gate I felt a bump.”

“And you didn’t stop?”

Pigguns just shrugged,” it happens.”

“This is just testimony! Can you prove he was even there,” Rufus objected.

“I still have the sticker Mao Mao gave me.”

“That’s a speeding ticket,” Mao Mao added from the back.

Rufus began to sweat. Nm “Do you have any physical evidence?”

“Does the fender with your face still dented into it count?”

“I’ve been meaning to buff that out,” Pigguns mumbled.

Everyone turned to face Rufus. He pulled at his collar. His calm, collected demeanor beginning to give way to panic.

“Does the prosecution have anything to say,” the king asked.

Rufus balled his hands into fist before sinking low,”... no, your honor.”

“Say it right.”

“Just give us the verdict, already.”

“So rude,” the King banged his gavel,” I deem the defendants not guilty of assault and declare that the prosecution be jailed upon charges false accusations and wasting the courts time. The defendant's punishment shall be to clean up this mess.”

“What, why?”

“Because you’re all rude. So very rude.”

“Could you at least take me to jail first,” Rufus asked.

“I’m not going to put you in jail,” Mao Mao said.

“What?”

“I am, however, going to put you in the hospital.”

Mao Mao pounced at him when Bagderclops grabbed him out the air,” as I said. It's not a matter of ‘if’ but ‘when’.”

#Adorabat #Mao Mao #Badgerclops #Rufus #Reggie #Mmhoph #Fanfic #MissingArm!AU #Rambling begins:#Rufus and Reggie are interesting characters #Despite seeming like the typical scummy villains #Rufus actually cares of Reggie's wellbeing #That combined with their lack of actual physical skill #makes them no threat in a direct confrentation #its the way Rufus lies and manipulates his way around things that makes him dangerous

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fullmetalscullyy · 5 years

Note

Omg fluff #14!!! Aaaaaa ty ❤

this ended up running out of control but i couldn’t be happier with the results these two are such dORKS in this au and i won’t apologise for it uwu

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

“Am Iyour lock screen?” “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

“Roycould you get that?” Riza called from the bathroom. There was no answer.Huffing in frustration she quickly rinsed the shampoo from her hair. This callwas important, one she had been waiting on all morning and afternoon. Theminute she had stepped in the shower, her phone rang. Typical.

“Roy!”

He better not be asleep, Riza thought to herself. He had aknack of falling asleep any time, any place, and she had just left him fiveminutes ago to go shower to prepare for her night out with Rebecca Catalina.Ringing her hair out hurriedly, she called his name again, desperate for ananswer. She contemplated grabbing a towel to answer it herself.

Roystarted on the couch, his body jerking at the rude awakening. Towards the endof his dream there had been an incessant ringing and buzzing in his ear, tryingto disturb his peace.

“Roy!” Riza tried one last time, lettingher irritation show.

“What?”he yelled back, irritated. His eyes closed of their own accord, fighting thesleep which had a tight hold on him.

“Thephone!”

“Whatabout it?” he groaned, cracking an eye open to glare at the offending piece oftechnology. It was so loud. It wasunnecessary.

“ForGod’s sake, answer it!”

Roysighed and blindly felt for her phone and slid to answer, not even bothering tolook at who was calling. Riza had mentioned something about an important callbut for the life of him he couldn’t remember who it was that would be callingher.

“Hello?”he asked, voice thick with sleep, trying not to sound too rude towards theperson who had disrupted his slumber.

Beforehe heard the other person’s answer, the phone was plucked from his grasp. Waterdripped on his hand and down his arm. Confused, Roy craned his neck to look upat Riza who was standing beside him in nothing but a towel.

Now he was awake.

Afterthe whole fiasco with Dickhead Dan, Riza had moved into his apartment fairlyquickly. It started off by her just stealing the odd hoodie. Then she claimedspace in the bathroom for her toothbrush with the excuse that the majority ofthe meals he cooked contained far too many onions and far too much garlic – heliked them both, so sue him. The rest was history and now it was two yearslater.

The besttwo years of Roy’s life, if he was being perfectly honest.

Sleepcontinued to hold its grip on him, and his eyes drifted closed as Rizacontinued to talk. He listened to the sound of it, letting her guide him backto unconsciousness. He found comfort in everything she did and listening to hervoice was no different. Within a few seconds he felt himself losing his grip onreality once more.

Thephone hit him square on the chest. Roy grunted in pain, eyes blearily makingtheir way open once more.

“Letme rest, woman,” he grumbled.

“Thanksfor answering the phone for me like I asked,” she bit back, but there wasamusement in her tone. She had re-entered the living room, clothed and towellingher hair dry. Roy yawned loudly, stretching on the couch after sitting up. Coolair brushed over his now exposed abdomen and he shivered.

“Listen…”He found he had no answer to give her. It was Saturday afternoon, so it wasn’tlike he’d had a tiring day at work. Perhaps it was their night time activities makinghim more lethargic during the day, but there was no way in hell he was going toput a stop to that.

“Yes?”she asked sweetly, sitting next to him. She pecked his cheek with a grin, herdemeanour changing since she answered the phone. Perhaps she had noticed justhow tired he was. Not that he was trying – or able – to hide it.

“Whywas it so important?” he asked, changing the course of the conversation. “Iknow I asked already,” he added quickly to dispel any comment about hisinability to pay attention. He would have been able to concentrate if Rizahadn’t woken him up at six – still, she was unable to sleep past six in themorning – with a temptation whispered in his ear that was so great, Roy wasawake within a second.

Riza’sface softened. “It was my grandfather. He’s in town tomorrow and asked if wecould possible meet up for lunch. I haven’t seen him in over twenty years so…This is going to be special. I didn’t want to miss his call because I have noway of returning it.”

“Surelyyou could call him back?”

Sheshook her head. “He works very high up in the government and was calling fromwork. There’s no way to take an incoming call in his office.”

“NowI see why you wanted me to answer it,” he stated the obvious.

Onecorner of Riza’s mouth quirked upwards. “I just…” She clasped her handstogether, crossing her legs as she stared down at them. She was fully facingRoy now, her wet hair swept over one shoulder. “It’s been so long and he’s theonly family I have left. I didn’t want to mess it up.”

Roygrasped her hand, giving it a squeeze. “You won’t,” he reassured her, stiflinganother yawn.

“Howare you so tired today?” she asked suddenly, still amused.

“Someone woke me up too early thismorning.” He shot her a pointed look.

Rizalooked unashamed. “I didn’t hear you complaining. In fact, you did theopposite,” she grinned.

“Veryfunny,” he replied sarcastically, narrowing his eyes at her when she stuck hertongue out at him.

“Isit so wrong to rest my eyes for two seconds?” he asked, leaning back andclosing them once more. He crossed his ankles, stretching his legs out as hesat on the couch, clasping his hands on his stomach.

“Twoseconds?” he heard her reply. “No. An hour and a half? On a Saturday afternoon?When we’re both off work?” She was still grinning so he couldn’t be in too muchtrouble. “Yes.”

Hecracked one eye open. “I –” He had no further answer to give because yes, thatsounded like him. Riza laughed at his expression and Roy couldn’t stop himselffrom grinning at the sound.

“Anyway,I’m going to get ready, then you can sleep in peace. Rebecca will kill me ifI’m late.”

“RizaHawkeye? Late for anything in her life ever? You’re having a laugh.”

“Well,actually…” Roy cracked an eye open again, noticing the change in her tone. Ithad become more subdued, bordering on worried. He turned his head, opening botheyes, taking in her slightly fearful expression. She offered no furtherexplanation, instead her eyes flitted left and right before dropping to thefloor, her shoulders hunching slightly.

“Riza?”he asked, concerned, sitting up. “What is it? What’s wrong?” He hadn’t seen herlike this since…

Well,since the night he had punched Dickhead Dan in the face.

“I… Iam… late.”

“Forwhat?” Roy asked after a pause, his brain not slotting the pieces into place.When her head lifted and he saw her face, it still didn’t click.

“You know,”she urged, shifting her weight from foot to foot. “I’m late.”

Suddenly,everything became crystal clear. His stomach didn’t just drop, it torpedoed allthe way into the centre of the earth, leaving him gaping at his girlfriend inhis living room without it.

Hestuttered, his brain trying to formulate anythingto say to her.

Late…Late. As in… Pregna…

“Roy,I’m kidding.”

AsRiza broke out into barking laughter he threw the couch pillow at her as hardas he could. “Not funny!” he yelled to her retreating form. She was stillcackling away as he heard the bathroom door close.

“Maybenot to you,” she giggled.

Grumbling,he lay back on the cushions, trying to calm his racing heart.

“Pregnant,”he muttered under his breath, stifling the feeling of fear that came with thatword. Of course, that was ultimately the end game, however he was much tooyoung and unprepared to deal with something like a child right now. Most wouldargue he was a child himself, and that it was a good thing Riza had come alongwhen she did “to take care of him”. Of course, Catalina had laughed heartily atthat.

Speakingof, Riza’s phone – which had slid off his chest when Roy sat up – was face upand the screen lit up with a notification of a text from Catalina. What reallydrew his attention was the photo on the lock screen. All thought of herprevious cruel joke was cast aside, and his face softened.

Itwas taken by Riza when they were on holiday in Aerugo. He was on the beach, thesea in front of him as he looked to the left, sunglasses on his face. He hadn’tbeen too far away when she took it, but far enough so his whole body and backfit the length of her screen.

Hehad been pulling dumb poses simply because it had made Riza laugh while shesnapped away. This one, however, had been a quiet moment after all thehilarity. He’d thought Riza was dozing on the sun lounger and had just spent aquiet moment admiring the sea before him, the sun turning the surface todiamonds. He distinctly remembered thinking how lucky he was to be in thissituation with the woman he loved. Come to think of it, he had stood andreturned to the sun loungers to find a sleeping Riza.

Hadshe been faking it? he wondered,scandalised.

Vainly,he thought just how good his shirtless back looked, however what reallydominated his thoughts was the fact that Riza had chosen that photo inparticular to set as her lock screen. He chuckled. Someone liked what they saw,and that worked wonders for his ego.

“Am Iyour lock screen?” he asked when she entered the room again, holding up thephone and feeling too pleased with himself when her cheeks turned bright red.It was adorable but at the same time karma was a bitch and it was her turn tobe the butt of a joke.

“Youweren’t supposed to see that,” she muttered, trying to snatch the phone out ofhis hands. Roy, of course, leapt up from the couch and held it above his head.They were the same height so he didn’t doubt she would be able to reach it. Themethod she would use to attempt to retrieve her phone, Roy was unsure. It begunto buzz in his hand, the screen lighting up with an incoming call and a pictureof Catalina. “Give it back,” she demanded.

“Ah,ah,” he tutted, holding it even further away from her grabbing hands. “Why thisone in particular?” he teased as he grinned. “And how long has it been thatone? I thought it was that photo of us both in Creta.”

“It is,” she stressed, still trying in vainto retrieve her phone and end the embarrassment. Roy wouldn’t let that happen,however. He was having too much fun.

“Thisone isn’t from Creta.”

“Thank you Captain Obvious. It’s aslideshow,” she elaborated, sighing exasperatedly and rolling her eyes. “I justnever expected you to see that one in particular.”

“Likewhat you see that much?” he asked, waggling his eyebrows. Riza huffed inresponse, her cheeks turning a shade of pink. Roy just laughed at her expense.That, however, only made her more irritated. It couldn’t have been that badthough, because Roy could see the smile threatening to break through on herface. “Karma is a bitch, Riza Hawkeye, and it’s time you learned that.”

“Roy,”she scolded, trying again to reach for her phone, but her amusement leakedthrough. “Give me it. You know how she gets when you don’t answer her calls.”

“Exactly,”he grinned. “And I don’t have to deal with it all night, but you do.”

Itwas an unexpected course of action Riza used, but one Roy appreciated for itscreativity. She stepped onto his couch and leapt onto his back, clinging to itlike a monkey. Roy half laughed, half grunted, disbelief taking over so shecould effortlessly pluck the phone from his flailing hand and slid to answer,not moving from the spot on his back.

“Hey,Rebecca,” she greeted warmly, unconcerned she was still hanging onto him. Royhad been bent over at the waist by her weight and was now standing, back flat,and arms outstretched to keep Riza balanced on his back so she didn’t fall.Riza remained in place, apparently very comfortable, just chilling out on hisback.

“Riza,”he said pointedly, indicating she should get off.

Sheignored him.

“Oh,nothing. He’s just pouting because I won something.”

“That makes a change,” Roy heard hersarcastic reply. Instead of pouting, his brow furrowed.

“Youdidn’t win,” he grumbled quietly,still talking towards the floor. He tried to straighten but Riza dug herfingers into his ribs. Roy jerked and laughed loudly, protesting. He shuffledbackwards, trying to escape her fingers as they continued to dig into his ribs,but it was to no avail. It was an effort to keep her from falling off. Hegripped the back’s of her thighs, stopping her from crashing into the coffee tableand banging her head.

“What’s going on over there?” Catalinaasked.

“Justice,”Riza replied simply. Roy could hearthe wicked grin in her voice. Sure enough, he craned his neck around and saw iton her face.

“You’remean,” he pouted, sticking his bottom lip out.

“Shouldn’thave tried to steal my phone,” she shrugged.

“Do I need to call back at a later time or?Do you guys need a room for a few minutes?”

Rizasnickered. “No, we don’t. I think I’ve put Roy off that for a few weeks,” shegiggled.

Hehuffed and used all his strength to stand up straight, his back protestingpainfully as Riza wrapped one arm across his chest and her legs wrapped aroundhis waist, cementing her place against him like a spider monkey. In any othercircumstance Roy would be thoroughly enjoying this, but it was true, Riza had put him off any kind of activity inthe bedroom after her joke –

Oh,who was he kidding, he was absolutely enjoying the feeling of Riza’s bodypressed against his back as she continued to talk to Catalina as if nothing wasamiss.

Roygrunted as he shifted, trying to ease the pain in his legs. His thighs werebeginning to burn. Instead of climbing down likea normal person, Riza just shifted her grip as she continued to speak.

“Riza,” he tried again.

“Yeah,just a minute. I’m comfy.”

Shesnickered when she felt him freeze.

“That’sit,” he muttered, shrugging his shoulders to try and shift her grip. Of course,Riza just gripped tighter. Trying another tactic, he turned towards the couchand bent low and bucked, tickling her behind the knees to loosen her grip onhim. He tried to flip her over his head, and it worked. She shrieked, piercinghis eardrum with the volume. It’s a wonder Roy didn’t hear Catalina protestthrough the earpiece.

Roystraightened, staring down at a dishevelled Riza on his couch, staring back upat him as she laughed and felt something different from pride at his expertlyhatched plan stir inside him.

“It’sa wonder Catalina didn’t comment on that.”

“Shehung up ages ago.”

“What?”he asked in disbelief, breathing hard after his escape attempt, hands movingfrom his hips to falling loose by his sides.

“Yeah,I just wanted to see what you would do,” Riza replied, her own chest rising andfalling as she breathed hard. There was a glint in her eye, showing her mischievousstreak.

Roy’sown eyes flashed. He gripped her hand tightly, pulling her up rapidly so shestumbled, bumping into his chest as the air around them shifted. He smirked. Hecouldn’t imagine his life without her now, especially with all the shenanigansand laughter Riza brought with her. Even from day one, before they weretogether, they had always joked around like this. Being the third wheels, theyhad to find some way to entertain themselves and that mostly involved dumb shitthat left them in fits of giggles.

Helifted her up by the waist so thistime she had her legs wrapped around his waist from the front. Roy begun thewalk towards their bedroom as he eyed her hungrily with desire.

“Wait,”Riza laughed. “Rebecca will be here in half an hour.”

Royglanced at the clock then shrugged. “We’ve got time.”

Thebedroom door banged loudly behind them as Riza laughed. However, it was sooncut off when Roy pressed his lips against her, turning her laughter into moans.

#royai #royai fic #royai fanfic #ruikosakuragi #ask #fic request #writing prompts #emma writes #hold my hand

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jxffhxrdy · 4 years

Text

Raw 5/11/2020

Hey guys! Back again with opinions (that you didn’t ask for) on Monday Night Raw tonight- 5/11/2020. So let’s get into it! Again, I am not related to WWE in any way so what I say is not bible.

So, first of all, let’s get the most important thing out of the way. BECKY LYNCH IS PREGNANT Y’ALL!! Lowkey, kinda saw this coming? One, I think we’re about to see a lot of quarantine babies popping up haha. Second, the way they said she had a “big announcement”- what else could it have been? Huge congrats to her and Seth. I know she’ll be a great mom.

Alright, on with the rest of the show!

♡Asuka is now the RAW Womens Champion!

Duh. She was going to get it whether she fought Becky or not. Am I happy about that? Meh. I wanted it to go to Nia Jax, but Asuka is very talented and well deserving, so kudos. She has a bajillion wins under her belt- let’s get her an elimination chamber match too! I really liked how they did the pass off though. I thought it was super cute, very professionally done, and I didn’t feel like it “wasted” the briefcase. I was semi-hoping for Becky to hand over the belt and Asuka to hand the briefcase to someone else, but I’ll take what we got and keep my mouth shut. Looking forward to Asuka’s first feud (which is probably Shayna and will probably give us a Backlash match). Cute nod to Kairi too, glad WWE remembers she exists.

♡Angel Garza vs. Austin Theory vs. Akiri Tozawa?

Okay, so we all knew the download of Zelina’s clique was coming, but my question is- where did Tozawa come from? Who was he supposed to be fighting? Was his main opponent Garza? They were all in the ring at different times, then there was a poorly timed commercial break and I’m just all so confused. I’m kinda intrigued about how they are going to split up the group, but in no way excited for Garza and Theory. Frankly, I just don’t care. I think they got pushed up from NXT way too quickly, Theory especially. If one of them gets Andrade’s belt... let’s just say there will be some unhappy tweets sent out from me. Just when we thought this match was done....

♡Andrade (c) vs. Drew McIntyre (c) (MVP)

A champion versus champion match! And on the first show after a PPV! We love to see it. Andrade is very talented and I can definitely see him moving off midcard (even though he has the title, he’s still midcard y’all) and doing awesome things. Anything Drew McIntyre touches is gold. You could put him in a match with just about anyone and he’d make it great. He is such a talented performer, so passionate with every kick, punch, and promo and I just adore him. I don’t know a single person who thinks he is undeserving of his title (and if you do think he’s undeserving... who hurt you). I don’t really know why Drew got involved in the weird Zelina Clique fight in the first place, but I’m not complaining. I think they’re just getting some heat off of Drew before his next big feud. Regardless, my MVP of the night. Unlike the actual MVP, who sucked. Buttttt anyway...

♡Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross (c) vs. The IIconics

YES. BRING BACK A GOOD TAG TEAM, THANK YOU WWE. Are the IIconics annoying? Yes. But they’re supposed to be. That’s the whole point of their characters. Regardless of that, they are a legit tag team and they do amazing work together. They have fantastic chemistry that isn’t forced- like Bliss/Cross. The match was great, I love an IIconics win, and I’m hoping they’re the ones to dethrone the current champs. Still annoyed by Alexa Bliss, sue me.

♡Whatever the hell the MVP match was

I cannot stand this. Truthfully. I don’t even care much to write about it. The only one I give a shit about here is R-Truth and even sometimes I think he’s too much (like tonight). He needs to be focused on the 24-7 title and kicking Gronk’s ass and MVP needs to just... go away. And take Bobby Lashley with him. Ever since the whole tire bit a few weeks ago, Bobby Lashley is a full joke. I don’t want him in a title picture or doing anything besides dumb backstage shit. Also- Lana should’ve been let go instead of Rusev after that promo. Woof. Please, just take them away.

♡Aleister Black/Rey Mysterio vs. Seth Rollins/Murphy

Woof. This match. Okay, for one, kinda sucks they didn’t make Aleister Black and Rey Mysterio undead, because that would’ve been rad. But second roof makes sense. I just like undead storylines. So Black and Mysterio come out all cute and what not, then we get to Seth/Murphy. I have NO idea what they’re doing with Seth’s character, not even a slight clue. I thought he was all like this because he’s a new dad? But nah, I think this is like some AJ Styles PTSD thing. I honestly couldn’t even tell you about how the fighting was, because of how locked on I was to Seth. The second Seth got involved I went from 0 to 60. Seth is just an amazing performer and my jaw was on the floor. Like Drew, everything he touches is golden.The thing that I think got me here (in a good way) was the eye thing with Mysterio. My heart fucking d r o p p e d. I know it’s rumored that Mysterio is on his way out and I just know it’s going to end with him unmasking. The second I saw blood, I knew they were going to have to take his mask off. They cannot and they should not have Mysterio unmask and retire in an empty show. They need to hold off and let him retire in front of a sold out show. This man has had a golden career, he’s a future hall of famer, and needs that respect. I thought this match was well done by both sides, loved the Black/Mysterio friendship, and the new tension between Rollins/Murphy. Great. Good showing.

♡Shayna Baszler vs. Natalya

What is with WWE and giving Natalya losing matches? She’s so much better than that. That queen is a Hart, damn it, but you know Vince believes that Bret screwed Bret, so I guess Vince screwed Natalya is on the table now. I know they’re setting up Baszler to be Asuka’s first feud, it’s a tad obvious, but I hated that this fight came because of motherhood? Like what the hell was that. You could’ve done Baszler believing she had to fight her way through the female Raw roster to prove herself or something like that. But Motherhood is a tad soap opera- and we already got that with the Rollins fight. Snooze.

♡Edge vs. Orton Standoff

Alright, so I want to give this its own little section because I have a lot of feelings. This is obviously a rating grab. The Edge/Orton thing died at Wrestlemania with that hour long match. It felt like a really good finish and was good for both performers. Then they announce “Edge is going to chase the Viper”, which is just... overkill. It’s because they feel they have no one else on their card big enough to feud with one of them? Which is crap! Feed Edge to Drew! Give Orton a match with Seth to avenge his old buddy Mysterio. Just stop overputting these two legends together like this because it will truly never end. If Orton wins the next match, then Edge can just turn around and say “well I’m not done either!” and it will drag. I was so hoping for a friends ending, but... ugh. I love both of these performers, but I hate dead end circle feuds.

♡General Thoughts

-What the fuck was that Lana promo and why did it suck so bad?

-First match announced for Backlash 2020: Edge vs. Orton in a “regular wrestling match” whatever that means. Will probably be the main event or one of them.

-Brand vs. Brand match next week with Drew McIntyre and King Corbin. Love this. Love both of these performers, I think they’re going to do some great stuff together. Corbin is most likely getting his ass beat, but I hope this is a forward to giving Corbin the Intercontinental title. I just need it off Sami Zayn.

-Goddamn, I love Drew McIntyre.

-We didn’t have a single roll-up finish all night! God bless America.

-Seriously, what the fuck was that Lana promo?

Anyway, hope you all have a great night and I will see everyone on Wednesday for AEW and Friday for Smackdown!

#raw #monday night raw #wwe raw #mythoughts

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