thesilentonek

[thesilentonek]

#choices #no regrets #black tumblr

[thesilentonek]

I love a “talk to me, what’s wrong” type of person

[thesilentonek]

[thesilentonek]

[thesilentonek]

It’s been awhile since I’ve shown my face and my lips look so juicy 😏

#black tumblr #naturalhair #black is beautiful #melanin #black women #black beauty

[thesilentonek]

How to Meditate

Assume a comfortable position with your body. The most recommended posture for meditation is seated cross-legged. This is because it balances support for the body and wakefulness for the mind. However, you can lie down, be seated in a chair, or adopt another similar posture. The main emphasis for meditation posture is that it allows you to focus your attention on the meditation without getting distracted by the body.

Close your eyes and breathe naturally. 

Focus your attention on the space directly ahead of you and slightly upwards as the spot between your eyebrows. In sanskrit, the word for meditation is ‘dhyana’ and it essentially means ‘to pay attention to.’ There are many meditation techniques around but what they all depend on is the application of attention. Here, you want to be gentle with your attention. Do not strain your eyes but be relaxed and attentive. If looking between your eyebrows is a strain, try aiming toward the tip of your nose instead.

Do not deliberately imagine or think about anything. Remain composed, relaxed, and attentive to the space between your eyebrows. The purpose of meditation is silence and stillness. However, there is a difference between actively thinking and “having” thoughts. Here the instruction is to refrain from actively thinking. This does not mean thoughts should be suppressed from arising. In meditation, your attention can be focused and relaxed and without thought. Then a thought might arise out of nowhere. This doesn’t mean something bad or wrong happened. You do not need to push the thought away in order to “preserve” or “get to” inner silence. If you do not follow the thought by thinking about it, then it will leave the way it came. If you do follow the thought and find yourself engaged in a train of thoughts, gently bring your attention back to the spot between your eyes and refocus with a calm breath. In this way, you free your mind from the compulsion to chew needlessly on phenomena appearing in your consciousness. 

Set a timer. Do not get up until the timer sounds. Along with thoughts, many feelings may get churned up during meditation. Some of those feelings may be angry, anxious, energetic, or restless. Do not allow them to control you. If you simply remain seated and attentive with eyes closed, you will be victorious over any thought or feeling that arises. It takes more doing to quit a meditation than to see it through to its end.

Common Issues

My thoughts just don’t stop. They can even get more out of control. What am I doing wrong? For your whole life, and perhaps others before it, your mind has acquired many habits and imprints. When you sit for meditation, those mental phenomena begin to enter your conscious awareness. That is how they “leave” or are “dissolved.” This doesn’t mean you forget important things or knowledge but rather the limits you have unknowingly placed on your perceptions are being released. At first, this can be overwhelming. It is not a sign of something wrong, it just requires you to apply sustained effort in the meditation practice.

How can I stop my thoughts? All you can do is rest your attention and refrain from deliberate thinking. Be patient with your mind and reign in your attention as often as necessary when you find yourself lost in thought. Once rested and focused, your attention simply witnesses whatever thoughts appear. They will settle into silence in their own time. Moments of silence and contentment will occur and deepen. 

When meditating, I keep having an emotional experience of pain, sadness, obsession, anger, jealousy, etc. How can I make it go away? Like thoughts, these emotions are also imprints in consciousness that you have been carrying with you unknowingly. Your body is physically activating pathways associated with experiences that are not actually happening. In meditation, those pathways are allowed to burn themselves out. You cannot push them away or escape from them. All you can do is give them the space to be there. Like watching a thief, you bear witness to them so as to no longer lose perspective to them. They too will dissipate in time.

My body parts go numb when I sit for so long. What can I do? It’s fine to stretch out and massage your limbs if necessary during meditation. Try to keep your eyes closed and attention focused when you do. 

I feel sleepy when I try to meditate. Why does this happen? When the mind is not being actively engaged, it can be in the habit of going to sleep. Whenever you feel sleepy during meditation, get up and splash some water on your face and go back to the meditation. If you haven’t been getting enough sleep then forget the meditation and take a nap or go to bed early. 

Can I focus on my breath or something else instead of the space between my eyebrows? Meditation’s key is application of attention. Attention can be applied to the flow of breath, an image, or a mantra. However, as you practice, your awareness will settle down into increasing silence and stillness. Using the space between your eyes is a silent and still point of focus. Whereas using the breath is a moving point of focus. This has its own benefits and use too. Having practiced several forms of meditation, I like to recommend this way since it worked for me best. That said, feel free to explore in order to find what works for you. Whatever you decide, I would suggest practicing that technique for six weeks to get an appropriate sense of its value.  LY

[thesilentonek]

Self-Awareness Questions

Self-awareness is having an accurate picture of how you tend to think, feel, act and react. It’s knowing what your strengths and weaknesses are, and knowing exactly what you want from your life. Also, it’s assessing how well you relate and interact with people you encounter in your daily life. This is crucial if you want to succeed.

The questions below can help to deepen your self-understanding and self-awareness.

1. Would you rate yourself as happy or unhappy? What has the greatest impact on your happiness?

2. Are there any areas of your life where you feel you are out of control?

3. Do you prefer a tidy, organised environment or a chaotic, disorganised environment?

4. Are you more attracted to something if you know it is forbidden?

5. Are you motivated, or demotivated, by competition?

6. Are you a leader or a follower?

7. Do you find it easier to do things for others than to do things or yourself?

8. Do you have clear boundaries or do people walk all over you?

9. Are you a morning or a night person?

10. Does being around people energise you or wear you out?

11. Do you prefer to be in the spotlight or the background?

12. If you could change one thing in your life, what would that one thing be?

[thesilentonek]

Learn to say “can you love me a bit harder today? It’s a rough day” and then explain how you want to be loved harder.

Learn to say “I could use some support. Are you able to provide some? This is how you can support me -“

Learn to say “I feel lonely. Are you able to keep me company?”

Learn to say “I’m feeling overwhelmed. Can I talk to you about it?”

Do this instead of dropping hints or expecting someone to be able to read you. What may be obvious to you isn’t necessarily obvious to someone else. You’re often hurting your own feelings by not communicating your needs and just hoping people meet them anyways.

I know this is easier said than done. We often drop hints because we feel ashamed or bad about asking for help. But the truth is, for most of our loved ones, us hinting at things is exhausting. It can also set them up for failure because they don’t know your expectations. Sometimes they miss hints but sometimes they ignore them because it’s more draining when they aren’t asked directly. It’s very likely your loved one would appreciate you being direct.

People often want to support and help you, but a lot of them like to be told how they can do that.

[thesilentonek]

Hi yogi, hoping you are well. Also asking for your insight: how do you know when you're not with the right person? Or if a relationship has run its course?

The short answer is that there is no way to know.

No one can tell you who the right person might be for you, or even if you are best suited for monogamy versus other forms of relationships. That's on your own introspection and self-understanding. And it comes with experience. How can you know if you don't have the experience? The idea of something can be very different from the reality.

So I can't speak to that for you. But I can give some perspectives on the nature of romantic relationships.

My first girlfriend was in 3rd or 4th grade--and I went to an all boy school. I think that goes to show that I guess relationships are just in my karma lol. I've never been the kind of single guy who just plays the field, hooks up, and has fun. That sounds nice but for me I seem to be more into forming connections that blossom into relationships.

I've had a lot of girlfriends between grade school and now. Each one of those relationships has taught me something about myself, about what I want (or don't want!) in a partner, and about how I can better support and love my partner.

So to come back to your question, there are obvious ways to know when a relationship has gone bad, of course. If someone is treating you like shit, did something horrible to ruin the relationship, or some other big red flag then it's obviously very clear.

But sometimes it's not so clear.

I've been in a relationship in which I have truly and deeply loved my partner. And I excused repetitive, emotionally abusive behavior because I thought she would grow out of it. Or some other excuses I made for them.

I'm in a different relationship now and it's crazy how it's opened my eyes in comparison. I can give some of my own perspective about it.

Keep in mind there can be exceptions to these and that every relationship is different. However, I have observed these not only in my own relationships but in those long-lasting relationships around me.

1. You're on the same team.

It's okay to have disagreements and to have emotions come out during those disagreements. But the focus should feel like it's you and them versus the disagreement. Not you versus them. How can you join forces and work together to eliminate the issue and help each other come to a place of feeling at ease about?

2. You learn how to make each other happy.

We all have simple things that make us happy. A back massage, flowers, surprise snacks, remembering certain things, a favorite beverage, and so on. If you love someone, you do tend to make note of these things. While the happiness of your partner is not your explicit responsibility, love comes with the urge to brighten their life. It is good if you feel this way toward them and if they feel this way toward you.

3. There is sincere and clear communication.

Even if you've been with someone for a long time, neither of you are mind readers. There must be communication for there to be harmony. If two musicians are playing together but can't hear each other, you can be damn sure it'll be a discordant mess.

4. There is space for support.

Life can have shit moments and times. So many of our own old wounds may come up and also events external to the relationship may cause us suffering. Tears, despair, fear, and so on. It is important that there is space for this to be supported together. This requires two things. The first is that whomever is upset does not take it out or unjustly blame their partner, or use these upset feelings as a lens through which to judge or distort their partner or your relationship. The second is that the partner doesn't get squeamish about the emotion and can be there to hug, to listen, to love.

A side note that I saw as a joke in a meme but is actually high yield: When your partner is upset, ask "Are we in problem-solving mode or support mode?"

As someone who likes to be helpful and uses insight as a love language, I have definitely pissed a girlfriend off before because I've tried to help when she was upset about something rather than just supporting her through the emotional moment.

So all of those above are things that when put together will make some good fundamental elements for a working relationship. And they are all reasonable. If you want those things and your partner will not or cannot, you can move on feeling that it may be sad and unfortunate and painful but also knowing that it's necessary.

I can't tell you what's in your own heart, as I've said. If by "run its course" you mean, "no longer want to be in a relationship together" then that's more to do with your own heart.

To better know your own feelings, and to be free from them distorting your perception, I high recommend a daily meditation practice.

I hope this was at least a little helpful!

LY

[thesilentonek]

GUYS!!!!! I DID IT!! I PUT THE PIECES TOGETHER, AND I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT MANIFESTING IS AND HOW TO DO IT NOW!!!!!!!

Ehem. Sorry. I'm very excited at the moment. Without further Ado, here is my epiphany from today!! As always, these are just my personal opinions, so take what resonates and leave the rest ❤️

The 4D is one part of reality. That is to say, imagination is an entire half of our experience. The other half of our experience is, of course, the physical reality, or 3D. This makes up one portion of US; I call it our awareness, and it is also called our consciousness. The other part of us is the part that remembers everything, known as the subconscious mind in the community.

The subconscious mind is often referred to as the creator of our reality, and in reality the subconscious mind is just as much a part of us as our imagination and our actual physical reality. Basically, the subconscious is our god state, higher self, etc. When we access it directly, we get into the void state, where we are pure consciousness, with no awareness.

So okay, we are consciousness and the subconscious, but what does that MEAN? The answer is so simple, and it's something repeated time and time again: you create your reality ENTIRELY. Every single thing (and this includes bad things like trauma, more on that in a sec) is created by your mind, because you aren't just awareness, you are also reality itself. The subconscious mind is everything and nothing (the void). It remembers everything but sees nothing, instead it reflects what happens in your mind onto the outside experience. Meanwhile, the conscious mind is the one that feeds the subconscious its information; it is the part that actually thinks. This is why changing your thoughts or your imagination or affirming or scripting WORKS. It's because you are BOTH the creator AND the creation.

Basically, our perception of reality and our perception of our thoughts is one part of us as a whole being. The other half of us is reality itself, every single possibility, waiting for us to tell us what is true so it can create that experience. That is why we can manifest. It also explains eiypo, because everyone and everything IS you: reality is literally created by your thoughts.

Okay, now onto explain why bad things aren't your fault, but first we need to understand that our mind tries to protect us from fully realizing our potential. Even as babies we were master manifestors, and as children we are better at manifesting because we have less limiting beliefs, so our mind needs to create barriers to protect us, because otherwise we would create our realities and possibly get hurt. Also, what child is ready to realize the responsibility that comes with this?

So, the mind plays a clever little trick on us, and separates our conscious and our subconscious minds, thus creating the effect of reality being your thoughts filtered by your EGO, which is basically you but without the knowledge that you are literally the creator of everything.

The good news is, you can TOTALLY bypass this whole thing by purposely affirming and ignoring what your senses are telling you. The subconscious mind is separated from your awareness, so it only has your neuron pathways to go by (basically the pathways created by your consistent thoughts), and it takes the information from those pathways and converts it into reality. Most of the time, reality is fixed, because most people don't know that they can control it, but once you find out how to, you can create these same pathways by just believing in something.

I like to refer to reality as being an elaborate scheme by your brain to make you not realize you're a god lmao.

So basically, until you learn to control it, this process of manifestation is controlled by the ego, and not by you directly. Because of this, you manifested/ created your trauma, along with everything else, but it is NEVER your fault that bad things happen until you FULLY realize your highest self, at which point you will have total control over your reality.

So how do you realize your highest self? It's really easy really! Just think how you normally do AS YOUR GOD SELF. Know that you have everything you want, because you are EVERY possibility, reality, circumstance, person, etc. Everything is you, everything comes from you, and nothing will ever stop that, so use it wisely.

Did I explain this well enough? It's kinda all over the place but I REALLY hope it makes sense because this is literally my thoughts in the god state. Good luck everyone!!

[thesilentonek]

The "fixed reality" state/ victim mindset and how to surpass it

Since my god state experience, I have realized that the way that we think is entirely backwards, and I'd like to help as many people as possible fix their mindset. The purpose of this post is to explain the fixed reality state, also known as the victim mindset, and how to surpass that state.

What is a state? A state is just a state of mind. Easy enough right? The fixed reality state is a state of mind where you believe that reality is fixed/ set in stone. This is the state that we are taught to be in, we believe that we are controlled by the events that happen to us and we are formed by our experiences. This is for our own safety, the mind would not be able to handle knowing that we create reality when we are younger, and so it develops a view of reality that states that we are at the mercy of reality.

What it feels like to be in this state:

You believe that you're lying to yourself when you say your affirmations

You believe that certain things are true and certain things are untrue, and that nothing can change that

You believe that things happen TO you

You believe you have to work hard to get what you want

You believe that society is set in stone and will always be the same (in your lifetime, at least)

You believe that time exists

Etc.

We have all been in this mindset, we all know what it feels like, and we all have to learn to surpass this way of thinking to fully realize our potential.

The way to surpass this mindset is to fully allow yourself to realize that everything comes from you. When I say fully allow, I mean don't think of it on a surface level. Don't just say it as an affirmation and be done with it! Really THINK about the idea that everything is you and your thoughts pushed out onto reality.

The 4D, or imagination, is 100% as real to our experience as the 3D reality that we are in right now, and in fact, it is the key to creating our entire reality. All you have to do to manifest is believe/ assume that you will get what you want. You can do this in many ways, but once you KNOW that it's yours, once you won't be surprised if you get it, THAT'S when it'll come to you (consistently anyways, I'm sure you don't have to be in this state to manifest things, but I'm talking about fully realizing that you can manifest everything).

What this state feels like (to me):

I know that I will receive my desires

I know that I create reality as a whole

I am not worried about the 3D AT ALL

I know that nothing is set in stone and everything can change instantly

I know that things happen BECAUSE of me

I don't feel the need to affirm, all I need to do is decide I have something, and then it is mine in my mind

I know it is easy and simple to get what I want

I believe that time is a construct and that it flows through and around me, but it does not define me

I can fully change my mind Instantly. It's so strange to feel my brain changing the way it thinks but it's fast and easy now!

I'm sure this state feels a little different for everyone, and that's okay! We are all our own little universes, after all, and we all think differently about different things, for sure!

I definitely hope this helps to explain it more for everyone!!

[thesilentonek]

The Law and her laws

★ Your subconscious mind does not have eyes. She only manifests what YOU think about. She doesn’t know about what’s happening in your 3D unless you start thinking about it.

★ Your subconscious instantly absorbs affirmations like a sponge. With only one affirmation it’s already done in your 4D. With persistence it materialises in your 3D.

★ 4D is the only conformation you need because the 3D always changes itself to match 4D

★ You affirm to remind yourself that your desire already is yours

★ Manifesting is about changing your mindset and thought pattern and NOT seeing something new in your 3D

★ The things you hear and see in your 3D that contradict your manifestation don’t exist in your 4D. Therefore they aren’t real or relevant because 3D will only materialise whats in your 4D and will get rid of the things that contradict your assumptions. WITH PERSISTENCE.

Persisting means not giving up and being consistent.

★ Your subconscious believes that you’ve experienced what you visualise

★ What you focus on manifests

★ You can manifest whatever you want. Logic doesn’t exist.

★ You can change your past and your future.

★ I’ll update this when new aspects of the law pop up in my head. These are the only things that came to my mind when i thought about the rules of the law but honestly i think this is it?

[thesilentonek]

YOU ALL NEED TO READ THIS!!!!

cr. too @/lawofcam on twitter (i love her <3)

[thesilentonek]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[thesilentonek]

Relationship Truths We Often Forget

1. All successful relationships require some work. They don’t just happen, or maintain themselves. They exist and thrive when the parties involved take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their minds and hearts. Open communication and honesty is the key.

2. Most of the time you get what you put in. If you want love, give love. If you want friends, be friendly. If you’d like to feel understood, try being more understanding. It’s a simple practice that works.

3. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot in someone’s life. Never force someone to make a space in their life for you. If they know your worth, they will create time and space for you.

4. There is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some will test you; some will teach you; some will threaten you; some will use you. Others will heal you, and help you see your strengths, and help you to discover your authentic self.

5. We all change, and that’s okay. Our needs change with time. When someone says, “You’ve changed,” it’s not always a bad thing. Sometimes it just means you stopped living your life their way. Don’t apologize for it. Instead, be open and sincere, explain how you feel, and keep doing what you know in your heart is right.

6. Forgiving others helps YOU. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the answer. It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.

7. You can’t change people; they can only change themselves. Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by example. If there’s a specific behavior someone you love has that you’re hoping disappears over time, it probably won’t. If you really need them to change something, be honest and put all the cards on the table so this person knows what you need them to do.

8. Heated arguments are a waste of time. The less time you spend arguing with the people who hurt you, the more time you’ll have to love the people who love you. And if you happen to find yourself arguing with someone you love, don’t let your anger get the best of you. Give yourself some time to calm down and then gently discuss the situation.

9. You are better off without some people. When you have to start compromising yourself and your morals for the people around you, it’s probably time to change the people around you. If someone continuously mistreats you or pushes you in the wrong direction, have enough respect for yourself to walk away from them. It may hurt for a little while, but it’ll be ok. You’ll be ok, and far better off in the long run.

10. Small gestures of kindness go a long way. Honor your important relationships in some way every chance you get.

Source: http://www.marcandangel.com/2012/02/08/12-relationship-truths-we-often-forget/

[thesilentonek]

Where are the black tumblr users that are still active on here at? please REBLOG

[thesilentonek]

Emoji spell to attract financial abundance through the use of your natural gifts and talents so that you can live a financially free life. You deserve it. And you will have it. It's inevitable.

💡🎨🧷💲✏️📖🎤💰🎬✨🔮💲💡🎨🧷💰✏️📖🎤💲🎬✨🔮

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