things have been a little easier on us lately since it's christmas break but i can't help but feel a bit of doubt
i've been noticing that sometimes i just kinda..... forget i'm a system in a way y'know?
things get super quiet for a long time and i front for most of that time (at least, i think i do, unless someone else fronts when i'm not aware)
i worry sometimes that i've just fooled myself into thinking i'm a system or something... our alters reassure me that we actually are a system but i can't help but doubt y'know!!
i feel like i'm losing my mind here because for some reason it feels like my alters only show up whenever i remember, or something. or maybe i never noticed when they do show up
but i know my experiences are real. they have to be. i feel the differences every time i take a backseat and we feel the differences bodily whenever specific alters front. i feel a little disoriented and blurry as i'm typing this
but i just
i dunno anymore. am i making any sense at all. sorry if this is weird and unnatural
Diamond Doves are named due to the white specks on their wings, which resemble tiny diamonds - though they are not iridescent or 'sparkly'. They are one of Australia's smallest pigeons along with the Peaceful Dove, and are occasionally kept as pets.
here’s the closeted furries “hey man… can u bum me a cig” and “the one uncle nobody invites to the family reunion but SOMEONE keeps telling him where it is anyways”
if you want an idea of what john is like, imagine hau from pokemon sumo
ALSO the ppl who kept asking me for trans thomas art, HERE he’s trans in this au (;
autistic anger issues are So Much. i have my temper more under control now in that i rly dont yell/lash out anymore but i do regularly boil inside with incandescent uncontainable rage over something inconsequential and then it evaporates in the span of ten minutes. incomparable
ok since i see apparently a lot of people are moving here from twitter, i thought i’d make one of my own “what should/shouldn’t be done here” posts since these are things a lot of people seem to forget:
this automated train is provided for the security and convenience of the black mesa research facility personnel.
the time is 8:47 am. current topside temperature is 93 degrees, with an estimated high of 105.
the black mesa compound is maintained at a pleasant 68 degrees at all times.
this train is inbound from level 3 dormitories to sector c test labs and control facilities. if your intended destination is a high security area beyond sector c, you will need to return to the central transit hub in area 9 and board a high security train.
if you have not yet submitted your identity to the retinal clearance system, you must report to black mesa personnel for processing before you will be permitted into the high security branch of the transit system.
due to the high toxicity of material routinely handled in the black mesa compound, no smoking, eating, or drinking are permitted within the black mesa transit system.
please keep your limbs inside the train at all times. do not attempt to open the doors until the train has come to a complete halt at the station platform.
in the event of an emergency, passengers are to remain seated and await further instruction. if it is necessary to exit the train, disabled personnel should be evacuated first. please stay away from electrified rails and proceed to an emergency station until assistance arrives.
a reminder that the black mesa hazard course decathlon will commence this evening at 1900 hours in the level 3 facility. the semi-finals for high security personnel will be announced in a separate secure access transmission. remember, more lives than your own may depend on your fitness.
do you have a friend or relative who would make a valuable addition to the black mesa team? immediate openings are available in the areas of: materials handling and low-clearance security. please contact black mesa personnel for further information.
if you have an associate with a background in the areas of: theoretical physics, biotechnology, or other high-tech disciplines, please contact our civilian recruitment division. the black mesa research facility is an equal opportunity employer.
a reminder to all black mesa personnel: regular radiation and biohazard screenings are a requirement of continued employment in the black mesa research facility. missing a scheduled urinalysis or radiation checkup is grounds for immediate termination. if you feel you have been exposed to radioactive or other hazardous materials in the course of your duties, contact your radiation safety officer immediately. work safe, work smart. your future depends on it.
please stand back from the automated door and wait for the security officer to verify your identity. before exiting the train, be sure to check your area for personal belongings. thank you, and have a very safe and productive day.