violin-wizardess

[violin-wizardess]

THE NATIONAL MUSEUM OF BRAZIL.

That’s what we’ve lost. 200 years of our Natural History, Archaeology and Ethnology.

[violin-wizardess]

Forsaken Lore From Before The Storm

Before The Storm by Christie Golden came out this week. Within the book are a few gems of lore about Forsaken and how they function. The info below is from the book, and does not contain major spoilers. Even so, spoilers are within the content below, you are warned.

This is an amusing bit, page 178 about the physical status of Forsaken. “There was a rumble of appreciation for the acknowledgement. With other races, it would be applause and stamping of feet. The Forsaken, however, had learned it wasn’t wise to unduly wear our their appendages prematurely with such gestures. Clapping was terrible for the hands.”

Per the book the Dark Lady’s formal title as used by Blightcaller to announce her presence, page 178: “Queen Sylvanas Windrunner, warchief of the Horde and beloved Dark Lady of the Forsaken, has arrived.“ 

There is a section in the book about Forsaken, and rot. Page 177, "Those who drew breath doubtless would have difficulty doing so in this room; Parqual was well aware that although some of the Forsaken had dried out rather than decayed, most of their numbers had been raised while they rotted, and the smell could not be a pleasant one.”

Page 179 there is a proposal for the fighting in Arthai to pause fighting for 1 day so that the undead and reunite with friend and families who are still alive. The plan is favored among the Forsaken. There is a narrative about one of the forsaken having anxiety about meeting up with a loved one and what they might think of him.”If his heart could still beat, it would be racing with excitement.” - “But Sylvanas, apparently unaware of how profoundly her words affected him and others, continued.” The Forsaken ask for and are given permission by Sylvanas to touch the living at the meeting, but only if the living permit it. Exchanges of trinkets is also permitted.

Page 222 Calia and Faol oversee the gathering of Forsaken and living.

Page 230 - The forsaken at the meeting make efforts to not be as horrifying to the living. At the meeting an undead by the name of Annie is handing out sachets of flowers, and scarves to other undead. To help them hide missing lower jaws, and help mask their foul rotten smell. 

Page 233 Sylvanas rode out to meet  Anduin alone, and unarmed on skeletal horse back. Departing she presents her undefended back to him.

Page 245 - The reunion among the Forsaken and living has many touching moments. “After the first few reintroduction, things flowed much more smoothly and swiftly. Not all the reunions were as joyful and easy as others, but they were talking. Forsaken and human were talking.” - “There is such a thing as a new beginning, she thought. For all of us.” -Calia.

Page 248 “People thought that because Forsaken flesh was dead, it was limited in what it could communicate. Nothing could be further from the truth. A myriad of expressions crossed Parqual’s face: joy, love, fear, hope.”

Page 248: “Forsaken came in all stages of death: freshly slain, partially rotting, almost mummified.”

Not all of the meetings between the Forsaken and their living families go well, there is a number of cases of rejection. A living mother not accepting her undead daughter is one case.

Page 252 Anduin smiles and waves from across the field toward the end of the meeting. Putting his hand over his heart and bowing….to Vellcinda Benton, the Prime Governor of the Desolate Council. Sylvanas sees this.

Page 254 on Calia surviving the fall of Lordaeron, “He watched Calia, who had hidden in a ditch for two days while enraged mindless creatures swarmed and searched above her,” Calia walks through the meeting of living and undead and blesses them alike.

Page 256 Calia’s thoughts on the meeting “This is how it should be. The people of Lordaeron haven’t been free to be who or what they wish to be. For this moment, they are.”

Page 257 Light heals Forsaken, “It came, bathing him in its warm, gold-white glow. Parqual grimaces; the Holy Light healed Forsaken, but it was not pleasant for them.”

Page 258 Sylvanas did not know that Calia was attending until the meeting was under way and at an end.

(SPOILER) Page 259 Calia feels for her people, and wants to help them. “You are my people, and I want to help you,” Calia pleaded. “I only came to observe, to begin to get to know the Forsaken of Lordaeron.”

Page 259 the Forsaken no longer regard Lordaeron as Lordaeron, it is the Undercity to them.

Page 263 the Forsaken at the meeting were unarmed.

Calia still regards the Forsaken as her people, page 264.

Page 265 and others - Dark Ranger arrows are effective at killing Forsaken.

(SPOILER)Page 265 & 266 The living family members go so far as to try and shield their Forsaken family members with their own bodies. The Forsaken do so as well, trying to protect their living family members.

(SPOILER) Page 276: Anduin has the murdered Forsaken buried. “He brought with them the carvers of tombstones and the diggers of graves. The people of Lordaeron - of the Undercity - would not be left to rot, forgotten in a damp green field.”

(SPOILER) The Light and Shadow are both used to Ress Calia.

#i miss wow #i miss my forsaken characters #but are they fucking up sylvanna #not going back

[violin-wizardess]

#so what are your plans after college? #what do you plan to work on? #no #NO

[violin-wizardess]

if you’re reading this

a lump sum of money is on the way to you

[violin-wizardess]

Sylvia Ritter

[violin-wizardess]

—Can the word “handsome” be used for Lolita girls? —Definitely! >>> https://www.lolitawardrobe.com/c/ouji-lolita_0364

#if i marry someone someday i'll be dressed in the first one #all of them are pretty asf #love love love the black one

[violin-wizardess]

This is your reminder to make sure you took your meds today.

#important #go take your meds

[violin-wizardess]

As a portuguese person I can tell you that THIS IS NOT TRUE. I'm not paying this, and I have never before seen these "packs" on my country. We pay for an internet server and that's it (generally it's a service with tv and phone and internet and, eventually, cellphones, covering internet service on them too).

Also, we do not have Telco. Never seen it before, it sure ain't ours. And we don't pay in dollars. We pay in Euro. We still are European. So, no, nope, this is not from Portugal, nor what internet service in Portugal is like.

It's good, great, that you fight for net neutrality and to avoid things like these, but please, check your facts on other countries.

I repeat, THIS IS NOT TRUE, this is not from Portugal nor what internet servers are like in Portugal. We have not lost internet neutrality yet.

Thank you.

This is what Portugal’s “Internet packages” look like, now that Net Neutrality has ended over there.

Do you really want your cable company to do this to you? All those extra expenses will add up over time, you know. Not only that, but said cable company will become able to limit what you see on the Internet, stifling free speech as they wish.

We cannot let this happen. Join with me in the fight to protect Net Neutrality: https://www.battleforthenet.com/

#internet neutrality #internet #portugal #check your facts #this is not true #and here's to hope it will never be

[violin-wizardess]

he prefers the trombone, but ladies dig the violin

(re-upload because Fuck It™ [and because i forgot something that probably wasn’t very important but was bothering me])

[violin-wizardess]

When you finally find the energy to do stuff

[violin-wizardess]

Tumblr is shit for artists but I’m really bullheaded and I don’t want to move

[violin-wizardess]

who just sent me money “for being perfect”

[violin-wizardess]

Hellboy is a Good Friend

B.P.R.D. “Hollow Earth” Story by Mike Mignola, Christopher Golden & Tom Sniegoski Pencils by Ryan Sook Inks by Ryan Sook & Curtis Arnold Colors by Dave Stewart Letters by Clem Robins

[violin-wizardess]

“i’m sad i wasn’t born in the era of -” bitch do it! if you like love letters, write them! if you like poodle skirts, wear them! society is imploding as we watch on in abject horror! do whatever you want!

[violin-wizardess]

Okay, time to sit down and write some more for you, the eventual reader, in hopes that you will not do what I did. Because I do not desire for anyone to go through what I went.

So, remember all the times I said I was a violinist (or attempting to be one), and my life was playing the violin? Well, it didn't stop being the truth, but it might stop one day. I said I was tired and depressed and hopeless. Thinking I had reached rock bottom. Well, each day goes by and I just discover new dimensions of "bottom". It feels like an abyss that I just keep descending, but I can never say I am at my lowest. Life seems to ear and take that as a challenge.

I just wanted to be good enough. Play music and have someone say they like it, have people listening and enjoying, not me as a player, but the music as something that generates feeling. Art. So I kept going, even though I started late, even though nobody gave anything for me, even though all I heard was that I sucked and that I had no talent and didn't study enough, and I was going to just fail. At it. At life. At everything.

I had depression. I went to psychologists and therapists and psychiatrits. I was diagnosed and medicated, and survived, hanging on by a thread, a hope. That I would make it to college, that I would find friends and things would get better. And for a brief, vague moment, when I got in my town's college, after failing the other two better ones, it seemed I had made it. I was out of medication, I was going to be fine...

At the first time things went wrong, I thought it was my fault. I wasn't studying enough, I wasn't really ready for it. My teacher, a big important talented person, was not impressed, and quick to tell me that I should just quit and go work in a retail job. It sucked, but I swallowed tears and kept going. A semester of it, trying to take things lightly, because I got in with the wrong foot (bureaucracy problems). Next year, next two semesters, it would be the real deal. Or so I thought.

Second year, first and second semester, it was almost hell. No matter what I did, or how hard I tried, nothing was right. It could start okay, good, doing things reasonably well, but then,when exams got closer, everything would just go out the window and gone with the wind. I sucked again. I wasn't good, I was never good, I ws going to fail. My teacher just pointed out that everything was wrong and I was an idiot. When I tried to ask what was wrong and how to solve it, the answer was that it had already been said in the beginning and then it was just generically everything, shove shoulders, and it's everything. I got frustrated. I was also frightenedof everything. Going to class started being some sort of mental torture. I was panicking before every class day. I had gastritis because of it. I couldn't even sleep right. But everyone else was fine. All the other students were happy, thriving, confident, and playing beautifully. So the problem was clearly with me, right? Frustrated, once I stated that things sounded better at home, and that I was trying the hardest I could, and it couldn't all be wrong. Oh, boy, what did I do... The next two or three classes teacher proceded to give me a mental beating on how I thought I was doing great and was better than everyone else, when I was just a pile of shit. Ooooh, she thinks she plays anything good. Then, we had to have classes alltogether, when I was supposed to have other classes in college (and I nearly failed one because of that), to proced and drag my face in the mud right in front of everyone. And I took it. Thinking that they were right.

But when they said they were there to help me, they never did. They excluded me from every plan and dinner out. Not that I would go, I don't have money to go, but they couldn't even let me study with them. And yet, look at us, so open and friendly and helpful, and I was the anti-social.

Until this last month, beginning of third semester. One colleague, one of those I speaked the most and trusted a bit, came to tell me to think about changing professors. Because everyone saw that I was being humiliated and beaten to a pulp, without ever getting better. I was just being steped on, repeatedly. I, that said that no one would ever hurt me and shove me down, I was letting that happen by someone who I was giving my trust to help me. I felt like sinking. It was that evident. And it was also because I am what I am: not pretty, not a girl with long and perfect hair, and pretty face with beautiful eyes, like every other girl there. I am non-binary, and ugly. Someone non deserving of equal treatment and respect, apparently.

I changed teachers. I gave up on big important talented person.

But this also means that it finally happened. I failed. This is the end, before it even started. After this, I can never have even a half of a career playing the violin. All doors are closed. I can never be a violinist.

They will never let me become one. And I don't have any talent. It was just work, with a bit of luck. I had good grades and good auditions in the conservatory, but now it means nothing and is no more. I am not like them, and that makes me unfit. I can't even think like them. I don't like to step on others, and this is all a big competition.

Which is kind of ironic, actually. They always tell you, in Arts and Music, that you have to feel and be original. That you must be yourself, and think outside the box. But the truth is that you have to play the game by the strict rules imposed. You cannot be yourself. You can't be other that a cis beautiful long haired girl, or the cis young fit men. You can't dress diferently, act diferently, be diferent. You can only play the game and loose it. And I lost.

I tried to keep instagramming about my violin life, trying to set small goals and show some bits of it. Today, I asked if I should try and record myself playing more often. You know the answer. No. I don't play not even well enough for it. Go practice, go make something else.

And the truth is, that deep down... I hate them all. Save one or two people who have not done anything to hurt me, I just hate them all and I hope they just go away and disappear.

I have nothing to live for right now. I lived to play music, and try to make it right.

My parents think I'm useless, because I can't find a damn job. I still have two more years of college. I don't really know what to do right now.

So, my advice is, don't be like me. Unless you are really sure and great at it, and have already won contests by the age of 18 years old, don't go be a professional musician. Just an amateur. And know that you have to play the game of life by their rules, and that outside of the internet the queers and gays and lesbians and assexuals and non-binary and trans and all of you beautiful people who don't fit their box, you will still have to struggle for even an ounce of respect. I'm sorry. I'm sorry it is that way. But don't ever, never, let yourself be humiliated and steped on by anyone, be them your boyfriend, girlfriend, parent, relative or teacher or boss. Don't let yourself arrive to that. Don't let anyone hurt you.

#sorry i needed to just write this all #sorry i needed to vent #i am a bit hurt and sad right now #this is about art and music and toxic environments in it #and about people #be strong you guys

[violin-wizardess]

No, but you must understand, I would love to meet the ones who would play it in 40 minutes...

There has to be coffee involved somewhere.

[violin-wizardess]

Reblog if you're a roleplayer with social anxiety!

This could mean you struggle with interacting with other roleplayers in the community, or get anxiety over simple interactions with others.