writingawaymylife

[writingawaymylife]

@icyblogs imagining eventually he brings up turning himself into a Ghoul and the reader almost shutting it down. They want to spend forever with him, but the pain and suffering? The risk that his body can't handle the process and dies, and reader has to lose him just after they got him back?

And he does continue to treat them so delicately - because despite what you've had to become, he will always see you as his beautiful, gentle partner. He can watch you cave a man's skull in with a crowbar and still hold you that night like nothing has changed since pre-war. He has seen the strength you are capable of, but it just isn't even a thought in his mind that you've become something that deserves anything less than the most delicate and loving of touches. He sees you as you are now, scarred skin and all, but it's impossible for him to not see you as you were. He's incapable of it.

Thinking of writing more Ghoul!reader x Simon because despite the angst these two would be so soft and loving and caring but also the most bad ass and terrifying mother fuckers on the wasteland

#aerins thoughts #to have someone see you as you are and acknowledge how mucn youve changed #but still see *you* and be happy to take it all because #no matter what #they just want you

[writingawaymylife]

Thinking of writing more Ghoul!reader x Simon because despite the angst these two would be so soft and loving and caring but also the most bad ass and terrifying mother fuckers on the wasteland

#just thinking about how simon would have to relearn so much about reader #how he would see a dangerous and violent side of them he never wanted them to discover they had #how reader would be so ashamed and shy the first time simon sees them brutally kill someone without hesitation #even though it was for self defense #how they are basically an old person with years of experience but simon is *so young* and practically untouched by the wasteland #the near reversal of their mindsets from this world to the one before #but how simon is still so soft and loving to reader despite everything #still holds them like theyre a china globe #aerins thoughts #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader

[writingawaymylife]

A/N: so I read @icyblogs fic about Ghoul!Simon and I was so inspired, and suddenly, this idea had me in a chokhold. I was so tired last night I couldn't write it, but literally, the moment I got up, I was writing this out on my phone. I did a quick read through and tried to find any mistakes, so I hope it's smooth, but I did write this in a hour, lol

Synopsis: Simon has spent two years trying to survive after a rude awakening to the new world. Losing everyone close to you is an experience he never wanted to suffer through again. Navigating the world alongside that grief doesn't make it any easier. It seems, however, that the world has finally decided to give him some mercy.

Word count: 1,800+

Warnings: swears, angst, hurt/comfort, mentions of a severed hand and violence, please tell me if I missed anything

Simon had been stuck in some facility when the bombs fell. Some test. It's not like he wanted to stay in there, but they were testing out something related to the effects of cryogenic stasis on the human body (especially those who had peak body performance), and the week long study "just happened" to take place a few days before the bombs dropped. He had been told that if he took part in this, that him and his partner would be safe in a vault, but now he's waking up, and it's been over 200 years and everything is destroyed. He is mourning everything. The loss of his friends, his life, and you. Sweet you.

Waking up to this world bring so much grief that he nearly loses him mind, but he pushes through. Everyone that he ever loved and who ever loved him would want that. You would never forgive him for giving up. So, he eventually just falls into a life of survival. Odd jobs here and there, traveling. He often thinks back to who he used to be and his life, but he forces himself to focus on what is in front of him. Keeping himself afloat through the continuation of everything he'd known from before the Great War.

He's at a small town in the middle of nowhere yet again. Nursing a few shit wounds and an ever shittier whiskey as he tries to shake off some of the stress of the day. Raiders had taken up in an abandoned factory near the town, and he'd been hired to clear it out. Simple job for him really, yet even being out in the wasteland for a while now, he still finds himself missing his team. The companionship and the way they all worked together like awell-oiled machine. He tries not to think about how lonely it makes him, but some things just aren't so easily forgotten.

The bar is pretty full, much to his surprise, and the knowledge that he has found himself in yet another town where half the population begins getting drunk by 5 pm is putting him on edge to a certain extent. He's seen how easily people begin to pull out their weapons at the slightest provocation. So he keeps himself in the corner of the bar with his back to the wall, his rifle leaning against the table at an immediate grabbing distance as his eyes do idle surveys of the room It's unlikely that anything will turn sour, he knows that, but the past two years out here have only further emphasized all those years in the military; and he isn't keen to just let it all go for moment of lazy relaxation.

Then he hears something. It's drowned out by the other conversations filling up the space, but it rings something in his head, a small little echo of what once was. Leaning into that feeling shouldn't be so easily humored, he knows this, but beyond the veil of gravel and radio static there's something so familiar. A melody he hasn't heard in so long, one he can't help but soak in and embrace. His eyes are trying to find the source, weaving through the crowds, before they land on the weathered, spike shouldered, leather jacket of a Ghoul. He can't see their face, but something about the curves of their body looks so intimately familiar that he finds his hand shaking as it grips the glass. Inklings of recognition fire through his synapses, forcing him to stay on their back. They're talking to a man beside them, nodding along and shrugging before they're speaking again, and Simon feels like he's going fucking insane. The knowledge of that voice, that same intonation, forcefully summoned to the forefront of his mind.

Then the ghoul turns their face.

Everything comes to such an aggressive halt he nearly wheezes. His eyes never leaving their face, scarred and worn and-

You.

You're sitting there two hundred years after the end of the world in some leather jacket and vest, a rifle strapped to your back and two pistols in your waist holster. There's a severed hand on the table between you and the person, marred and glinting with a few rings, and the man you're talking to nods approvingly at it. Giving you a swift pat on the arm before handing over a rather comfortable looking pouch of caps. Then the man says something, and you're laughing, and yes, it's different and rough and age worn, but he would know it bloody deaf.

Simon can't move. He's thinking about all the years you've been out here. The pain, suffering, the ghoulification process that he has heard stories of, the things you must have done to keep yourself from going insane. His eyes are honed in on the pouch of caps, and he knows that you've had to become strong in a way that he wasn't there to help you through. While you fought through two centuries of destroyed civilization and were shown the worst of humanity, he had been safe and tucked away in a vault. It wasn't his fault. Not entirely. That doesn't stop the mind-numbing guilt that has come back and multiplied twofold. Nor the anger he's feeling that is mixing with that nauseated realization that everything he did, all he had sacrificed, had been for nothing. He had left you for months on end while the world was falling apart, and you didn't even get the one reason behind all of that.

Every reeling thought has that flight response he hadn't had in so long flaring, but he can't move, can't look away. He keeps looking at you and the way you talk and hold yourself, the similarities shifted through years of experiences. You still gesticulate but it's more toned down, arms staying relaxed where they rest on your thigh and the bar as your fingers dance in the air with whatever you're saying. That little smile you still do is on your face, but he can see how the light in your eyes has changed. Not gone, but as if it has taken on a different filter, colours being more highlighted than the ones that once were.

There's a slightest twitch where your brows once were before your looking around the bar, and he doesn't have time to look away, to hide his face and the shame he believes it will bring before you're looking at him. Eyes snapping to his and your body freezing in place. The man beside you is continuing on, but you aren't paying attention anymore. Your head is tilting. A furrow on your lips as you scan his face while he is unable to leave your eyes. He can see the slow build of shock and pain as recognition kicks in full force. Leather and spike clad shoulders almost shaking as you grip at the room temperature beer you were drinking. He expects horror next. Hatred. You had begged him to stay with you before, your pleas ignored from his desperation to keep you safe. The man stops talking, following your gaze and landing on Simon, but whatever he says next is ignored.

You're almost stumbling out of your chair as you land your feet on the worn bar floorboards, boots planting themselves firmly for a moment like you're hesitating. Eyes scanning and rescanning his face like you don't really believe what's in front of you. Then something clicks in your eyes and you're fucking barreling towards him. For a moment he expects you to try and kill him, and he wouldnt have even tried to stop you. He would have let you press the barrel of your gun into his forehead and paint the wall and tables with his blood and brain matter. But there isn't an ounce of aggression in your eyes as you roughly push past a couple of customers in the way, only such bone deep desperation and begging, suffering hope. Other customers are looking at you with shock at the suddenness of your actons. like you've suddenly gone feral as all conversation comes to a jagged stop. But no one moves, too interested to see what they probably hope to be an entertaining fight after a rather quiet evening.

When you get to him, you are stopping so quickly you collapse to your knees in front of him. Sucking in air like you didn't run twenty feet but miles, eyes pleading and shining with tears as one of your hands rests on the rough wooden floor like it's an anchor. The few nails you have are digging into the rotting spots, most definitely shoving splinters into the thick skin of your fingertips. The other hovers in the space between you two, fingers twitching as you seem to struggle between keeping them open, or pressing them against your fist to avoid giving into the desire physical contact he can see so plainly in your features. It falls back down to your lap for a moment. Neither of you are saying a thing in the dead silent bar as you give him such a begging look, his eyes start to burn.

Such heartbreak and fear and grief should never grace your face. It shatters him, dismantling him to his base atoms and burning away at his skin and organs. You're almost struggling to breath while Simon can't even remember how to when something finally breaks down within you. Your quivering hand reaches up again, cautiously, fearfully almost, to cup his jaw as you look at him like he's some mirage of shade and water after years in the desert.

Your voice croaks, the gravel in it emphasized by your scarred and aged vocal cords as you say his name likes he's your god. Bowed before an alter and finally being graced with the presence of a deity you've spent your life worshipping. "Simon?"

It's like he's been splashed with cold water, jolting him from where he sits as he leans forwards and practically scoops you up onto his lap. The other people are ignored, their stares insignificant as he wraps his arm around your waist and dig that hand into the soft leather there, his other hand coming up to the back of your head. He's pressing your forehead into his as you settle on his lap. Its like he can finally breath, that bone crushing weight leaving his chest as he sink into so many different emotions they become static, unimportant now that he has you in his arms and can feel your body and weight. Ragged breaths match your own as your arms tangled around the other, and he can feel the solid muscle and sinew under your thinning skin as you hold him so tightly. Like you're trying to fold him into you, make him a permanent part of your worn and weary body so he never leaves.

He vows than that he'll never leave you. Never go without that touch that hasn't changed despite the stark difference in your hands. Whatever happens now doesn't matter as long as he's with you, and he'll spend the rest of his days making you know that.

#simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #fallout #modern warfare #this was fun but i really should get back to me other fics now lmfao

[writingawaymylife]

So... along with my Cooper Ghoul and Sole Survivor fic, I'm also messing around with an Uncharted/141 crossover. Would anyone be interested in something like that? I was thinking of rolling out a chapter a week or smthn once I got at least half of it written out, though I know it'd probably be a pretty niche interest.

#uncharted #modern warfare #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #aerins thoughts #ive been doing so much research and literally bubble thought breakdowns #ive got most of the beginning established (just trying to most of it down now) #its pretty fun to write so im not too pressed it there isnt any interest for it #but if anyone does want to read it im totally up for posting it

[writingawaymylife]

I am crawling out of my hole, holding a fallout fic, walking onto my blog like it's a wasteland itself.

I have found another Ghoul that I vibe with. The Hancock girl (gender neutral) in me has been awakened. The fallout show is amazing, and I am frothing at the mouth about it.

#i have given up on trying to pressure myself into writing constantly on here #well #i did a few years ago lol #so ill drop this and *maybe* a second part and then i will be gone #poof #aerins thoughts #fallout series #the ghoul #trying my hardest to not flood the game tags because that shit pisses me off #cooper howard

[writingawaymylife]

ONLY THE SKULL!?

#im screaming crying throwing up #ugh i just want to SEE IT #fallout spoilers #aerins thoughts #yes i have come out of hibernation for this #i actually enjoyed the show a lot

[writingawaymylife]

it's hilarious how if you do any amount of research into life or death melee combat the prevailing themes that emerge are that

you're gonna get tired very quickly

tired leads to injured, injured leads to tired, tired leads to—

you're not gonna be as composed as you expect

humans are more fragile than you think and also more durable than you think. both are true and neither stop them from dying of an infection later (DO NOT GET BITTEN)

DO NOT GET STABBED (generally good life advice)

DO GET A SPEAR

knights are faster than you think

#writing tips

[writingawaymylife]

what companies who sell you anti aging stuff don't want you to know is that if you're chill about aging, your perception of attractiveness changes as you get older. there is no "wall" where you suddenly become ugly and unfuckable because in my experience what actually happens is you get into your thirties and suddenly realize that people in their thirties are hot as fuck and the "flaws" that the beauty industry wants you to panic about are a feature not a bug, and based on the std statistics in nursing homes I don't really expect that trajectory to change.

[writingawaymylife]

Final sketches for my December SAD ( sketch a day) challenge 🙏

[writingawaymylife]

Chin up. I know the night just got a little darker, but it won't last forever.

Happy Valentine's day!

#i think about this grandpa #a relatively healthy amount #my one bi oc sweating bullets when he meets this old detective man #my one lol #like they are not all blatant fruits

[writingawaymylife]

babby

[writingawaymylife]

Hey yall! In the spirit of having a safe and stress-free April Fools day, today I've curated a list of 18 different relatively harmless pranks that you can pull on your friends today! I thought of all of these myself, so please enjoy! :o)

1: You can send them a message saying something like "Hey! I bet you thought this notification was gonna be an april fools joke, but in reality, I just wanted to let you know that I love and appreciate you, and that I hope you have a nice day!"

2: Obtain a small, but noticeably out-of-place object (rubber duck, kazoo, etc.) and leave it somewhere you know your friend will see it, just to confuse them a little bit. Optionally, you could attach a little message to the object, letting them know it was you :)

3: Understandably, hiding your friend's belongings can be very distressing for them. Instead, hide one of your own belongings and ask them to help you look! Let them find the object. For bonus points, leave a kind message attached to the object for them to find.

4: Just simply hand them a random object. Don't hide whatever is in your hands, make it clear what you're handing them. Just ask them "hey, can you hold this for a sec?" and when they take it, just walk away.

5: Underneath everything they post on social media that day, leave a reply saying something along the lines of "I love and appreciate you" or some other nice thing. Do not stop. Be relentless.

6: Stop them when you're walking near/past each other. pretend to pull a hair/fuzzy/etc out of their hair, off their shirt, etc. Do this slightly more frequently that it normally happens. Don't make a huge deal out of it. Admit it if pressed or at the end of the day.

7: To expand on the previous one, you could instead pretend to pull a fuzzy/hair/etc off of them... and then pretend to eat it.

8: Leave out pieces of their favorite candy or other small, packaged snack in any place you believe they'll run into it throughout the day.

9: Order a pizza with them. Make the pizza half something they like, half something you like. When it gets here, pretend to get huffy about the toppings being on the wrong sides. (X should be on the left, Y should be on the right, etc.)

10: Spontaneously pretend that you have lost something. When your friend asks what you lost & if they can help you search, point at them, sigh in relief, and say something along the lines of "oh good, you're right there, I thought I'd lost my whole world."

11: Tell them that you're going to the store to get something mundane and uninteresting. Instead, go out and purchase your friend a surprise gift. This can be an object, food, anything. Pray they don't ask you to pick something up for them.

12: Take a photo of yourself and print it out. tape up behind a door that you know they will close, such as their bedroom door or a bathroom door. For bonus points, leave a nice message with it.

13: Hang a worm on a string or other silly item from the blades of their ceiling fan. Don't tie them on too well, make sure they're easy to remove.

14: Every time they sneeze, cough, or anything like that, pretend to be disproportionately worried about them. Use this as an excuse to do nice things for them throughout the day.

15: Gearing up to go out somewhere with them? ask if you can borrow one of their shoes. That's right, only one.

16: Ask them if they can leave you alone in the kitchen for a while. Make it clear that you are preparing an April Fools prank for them. The prank is, instead of making anything weird, you just made completely normal food for them. Comply with their requests for proof.

17: Make a paper sign that says something incredibly nice, like "I appreciate you." Keep it with you. Whenever your friend looks away from you, try to quietly extract the sign and show it off in their general direction. Try not to get caught until the end of the night.

18: Ending our list, you could show this list to your friend, and then make them put together the first letter of each prank that I've just listed for you.

I hope you all have a nice, safe, and stress-free April Fools Day!

;o)

[writingawaymylife]

i accidentally napped and had a dream (nightmare?) where a new update for stardew valley released where everything was the same except on a random day in year 3 Evelyn would just straight up die. There was a whole cutscene that started in her house where she collapsed, and then transitioned over to the hospital where Harvey gave George and Alex the worst news of their lives. However, they got to speak to her where she said something along the lines of "Yoba will protect me, and I am sure he will let me watch over you."

Alex and George would not talk to the player for more than a few words for a full season after this event. George would spend most of his time in the bedroom, so if you had less than 2 hearts with him, you could barely ever speak to him.

And Alex... oh my god, poor Alex. If you were married to him during this event, he just stayed in bed all day. Otherwise, if single, he would just stand on the beach most of the time, staring off into the ocean. If you tried to interact with him, it would just say "Alex is grieving... Better leave him be."

There was also other NPC dialogue like mayor Lewis saying "I haven't seen the community in this state of mourning since your grandfather passed..."

there was also a glitch where you could make Evelyn live forever and there were entire guides for the "immortal Evelyn glitch" that got patched out in the next update. If you tried to perform the glitch after the patch, mr. Qi would tell you that "hey, it happens to all of us. We can't prevent it, and neither can you, no matter how hard you try."

[writingawaymylife]

god gives the most fuckable mutuals to the most faraway soldiers or whatever the saying is

[writingawaymylife]

reblog this and boop the person you're reblogged it from

[writingawaymylife]

"who knows what they still do on tumblr"

us:

[writingawaymylife]

when your art program’s closing message hits you straight in the heart and makes you stop and contemplate the state of it all