ziggustardust

[ziggustardust]

addicted to nicotine like im addicted 2 the high of my edsheeren disorder 😹

#ed not sheeren

[ziggustardust]

meeting with sketchy men online who give you more reasons to st4rv3>>>

(ive lost my fucking mind)

#tw ed diet #tw ed vent #low cal ed #ed bllog

[ziggustardust]

life is a beautiful thing. i love you. i wish you could let me love you.

[ziggustardust]

IM SO HUNGRYGRYUYF 

#tw ed vent #low cal ed #just ed stuff #disordered eating thoughts #healthy eating

[ziggustardust]

f4sting is sm easier when ur sad omfg i love it and hate it

#eating problems #low cal ed #tw ed vent #poc ed #ed diet #just ed stuff #ed restriction

[ziggustardust]

a few months ago i shared that i have an ed with my best friend. she talked about how she may have a binge disorder. last week she was talking about how close we are. but that sweet moment quickly ended when she said, “…like when we were talking about how we MIGHT have e4ting dis0rders. love us!”. i never knew i had so much hatred in my heart for someone until that moment.

[ziggustardust]

jai guru deva om

[ziggustardust]

you know things are getting bad again when you’re binge watching supersize vs super skinny and getting active on tumblr.

#tw ana stuff #eating problems #low cal ed #tw ed vent #ed restriction #poc ed #obese ed #tw ed relapse #ed tumbr

[ziggustardust]

i’m in love with a dying man. every drag of his cheap cigarette and his vulgarly cheap body soap, reminded me of home. he is home. you should scare me away, but you can’t. i should’ve ran when you told me you were addicted to blow and took methamphetamine. but i didn’t. you can’t scare me away and honestly, that scares me so much. no matter what you do i can’t see anything other than beauty. you’re a dying man in this fairytale and i am nothing but the sand in the wind. i’ve never been much of a religious person but i do pray my dying man finds happiness within himself and everything he does.

[ziggustardust]

when they said, “food is FUEL”, all i can do is laugh in disgust and anger. food is purely just fueling my anxiety and self hatred. feeling dizzy? take three shots of espresso, with a splash of almond milk on ice. feeling nauseous? go to bed. is food really beneficial for me? i wish calories didn’t exist. i wish i spent more time doing the things i loved instead of thinking about food. i wish i was healthy and happy. i can’t continue to live my teenage years like this. i deserve to recover and finally be happy.

#tw ed vent #ed restriction #low cal ed #eating problems

[ziggustardust]

“food is thy enemy!”, i would tell myself. food is thy enemy. food is thy enemy. food is thy enemy. is food really thy enemy or is it my incredibly damaged mindest? god, i hope and pray that i recover.

#tw ed vent #ed restriction #low cal ed #poc ed #eating disoder recovery #it's not as simple as just eating #eating problems

[ziggustardust]

i remember the feelings of accomplishment and satisfaction when i would starve myself. currently, all i feel is sadness and disgust when i starve. the honeymoon phase of an ED doesn’t last long. i thought developing an ED would make my self esteem boost. i thought an ED would make me truly happy. my ED has caused me nothing but a pool of self hatred and depression. please, try and take care of yourselves <3

#eating problems #helpline #eating disoder recovery #tw ed vent #low cal ed #ed restriction #it's not as simple as just eating #ana blog