em1el

[em1el]

Hey happy Pride Month everybody!

#pride #I took the world's longest hiatus but I've decided I'm Back

[em1el]

I did it!!

#this is simpler

[em1el]

i’ve had the same url for years and years but...

what if I... changed it...

#to something that's not a dumb inside joke from when I was like 14

[em1el]

I was sitting quietly and concentrating but I kept getting distracted by a very specific train of thought which was “what if Middle Earth was just a particularly large college campus”

and then out of the obscure depths of my subconscious came the phrase “It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your dorm” and that was the point where I started laughing uncontrollably and there was no way to go back

[em1el]

I think I drew this weird alien Too Cute... dang... my curse...

facts about This Weird Alien:

doesn’t have a name yet (I am picky it has to be a good one)

kind of a scrawny nerd by weird alien standards but humans think it’s cute, it thinks humans are cute because they are so small and their hair is funny and they sure squeak a lot

comes from a warm arid planet where they climb around on the dry knurly trees and take dust baths, is not happy that the spaceship has a water shower instead

trained as a pilot for large transport ships and small shuttles but would really rather be speeding nowhere in particular in the space equivalent of a motorcycle built out of trash

Extremely Jumpy

can sleep anywhere and anytime; will put something in the toaster, go to sleep in a chair at the kitchen table, and SCREAM when the toaster goes off (see above)

two thumbs on each hand

those ears can basically swivel around in any direction like a couple of satellite dishes

honestly I meant for this to be more like “appealingly humanoid but can definitely open its mouth, bare its enormous teeth and let out a great howling roar” but like... clearly once I think something is cute I can’t do it any other way.

#drawing #digital #manga studio 5 #Aliens #getting sincerely invested in doodled characters #featureless gray void of artistic laziness #the Finished Level of this one is very inconsistent

[em1el]

I showed this drawing to someone at work and said “Have you seen the video of the bird that dances like this?” and realized immediately in the ensuing horrified laughter that this is one of those questions where the only possible answers are “omg yes” and “what the HELL is that?”

She had not seen the video of the Bird that Dances Like This, but I can assure you she has now.

#jorbtales #bad drawings #i didn't think this through

[em1el]

looks like it’s time to bring this one back

HAPPY STRESSFUL DEMOCRACY DAY EVERYONE.

I am tired of thinking about this election and hope it ends soon and in a good way.

#four years ago my hair was a lot shorter and i did not think that politics could get any worse and yet here we are

[em1el]

I’m doing a display of origami books at work so I got out of control and made my First Kusudama, it’s tinier than I intended (palm-sized) because I am a cheapo and tried not to use too much of the nice paper, but it is so pretty, so small and so pretty

#origami #kusudama #i made this #jorbtales

[em1el]

Inktober #2 is: Tiny Scully 

#Inktober #x files #drawing #Fanart? Fanart. #i drew so many scullies before i got it right #i drew this scully RIGHT ON TOP OF another scully and of course this is the one i liked

[em1el]

Happy Inktober everybody, here is my dog Willa, she is a lithe and deerlike being with the personality of a screaming eight-year-old kleptomaniac.

#Inktober #drawing #dog #doodle time #nondigital #before anybody asks about the red part: it's a crayola marker i found in a drawer at work

[em1el]

last night’s dream:

I was inside a greenhouse, up on a strange attic-platform in the peak of the roof, looking through a lot of big cardboard boxes of old papers, some of which were very entertaining but I no longer remember what exactly they were.

Some little kids climbed up - two young girls who come into the library a lot, plus two identical duplicates of the older girl. “Who’s in here?” one of them called out.

For a reason now lost to me, I replied, “It’s me, a lion.”

The older girl looked at me, thoughtfully. “Do all lions have hair like that?” Let’s take a moment to note that my hair is very long and very straight, and it does one thing and that is point directly downward regardless of what I do with it.

“No,” I said. “But some of them do.” I indicated one of the strange duplicate girls, who had her hair curled up into a solid, boxy pompadour. “Some lions probably have hair like that.”

#dreams

[em1el]

cinnamon bunzah

#food #i made this #i had some problems but they are very pretty

[em1el]

Assorted small draws from the slow times at work, featuring:

a mermaid

tiny anubis

the Prince of Birds

???ORB???

#drawing #doodle time #nondigital #jorbtales

[em1el]

@evangelinegarreau showed up in my dream looking like this

additional bonus rendition:

#drawing #dreams #featureless gray void of artistic laziness #yeah it's a melodica and she continued to hoot at me intermittently throughout the dream

[em1el]

i haven’t been on here in about a hundred years but here are some updates:

I got a job at a library

immediately, the only full-time person at the library had to go to the hospital and couldn’t work for three months, requiring everybody else to work extra time for several weeks. She’s back now and things are back to normal.

I interviewed for but did not get a slightly better-paying job at the same library (I am not mad about this, because as it turns out, not getting a job is much less unpleasant when you already have a job! also I had only been working there for three months so it was not surprising)

I bought my mom’s old car for three thousand dollars (oh god) so she could buy a better car

we found three extremely small kittens in our yard and my cousin had to take them to the humane society to find a foster family for them

A lot of Weird Squash have appeared in our garden, entirely of their own volition, many pumpkins et cetera. Stay tuned until october for further updates.

I told my dad I would knit him a pair of kilt socks but they have taken me longer than I ever imagined and I have undone and redone more of this one finally finished sock than possibly anything else I have ever made. Stay tuned for me to finish these, eventually, please. probably in october.

I continued 2016′s theme of “giving myself weird stupid minor injuries” by attempting to move an air conditioner with my mom, not properly working out a plan of action in advance, and inadvertently resting the sharp grating of the back side of the air conditioner on my hand, leaving a big swath of shallow, straight cuts all over my palm and fingertips - not serious or particularly painful, but gross and strangely geometric

(previous Small Stupid Injuries included: finger incident due to improper handling of very sharp spoon-carving knife, finger incident due to somebody trying to talk to me while I was slicing bread, inter-finger incident due to me putting my hand through a cloud of steam coming out of a kettle)

It got so hot that my mom and I went to see the Ghostbusters movie just to have something to do in an air conditioned building

It turns out there is an indoor rock climbing gym near me and I went with my friend and climbed some rocks!!

I finally found a pair of sneakers I actually like

I just watered my jade plant and a moth flew out and scared me

#story of my life

[em1el]

i dreamed i met Donald Trump and instead of cufflinks his sleeves were held together with binder clips

#dreams

[em1el]

Hahaha oh god I can’t believe the Firealpaca Autosave Post has become the number one way that people find my blog, this is my legacy now.

That said, I do thoroughly endorse any gentle insulting of minor demons you might get up to, let me know how that goes

I just briefly forgot the word “demon” so I said “hellsprite” instead and I think I’ve stumbled upon the funniest and most insulting thing you could possibly call a demon