nebjamin

[nebjamin]

master post of dogs celebrating passover

#happy passover #passover #pesach #dogs

[nebjamin]

#cat #cats #catposting #cute cats #cute cat #funny

[nebjamin]

D-DID SOMEONE SAY ROYAL GUARD?????

RAAAAAAAAAAAGGHHHH

#dmc #dmc posting #dmc shitpost #devil may cry #devil may shitpost #dmc5 #dmc dante

[nebjamin]

#all-time classic DMC post #if you can’t get into Dante dancing don’t talk to me #dmc shitpost #devil may cry #dmc5

[nebjamin]

having thoughts about a media that my friends aren’t into and thus would need the context of to understand my- AAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAH NOT THE HAWK WOUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

#none of my irl friends play the same games I obsess over #No how much I try to convince them #so now I have to rant to mys- OH MY GOD IT’S THE HAWK HOW DID IT FIND ME #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH

[nebjamin]

Does no one else find it odd that there’s a huge event happening in the sky and we’re not allowed to even look at it without our government-prescribed black censorship glasses that show absolutely nothing unless they’re looking directly at this aforementioned event? What is NASA hiding up there? Aliens???

#LOOK INTO THE SUN #LOOK INTO THE ECLIPSE #DON’T LET THE GOVERNMENT STOP YOU #WHAT IS JOE BIDEN HIDING #solar eclipse #satire

[nebjamin]

boop

Boop!

#boop

[nebjamin]

Does anyone want to listen to me rant about Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney? Because I have some thoughts.

#I LOVED the first AA Trilogy and TGAA 1 and 2 #so I KNOW they can do better than this #there were such cool moments #but the execution was so off #and Turnabout Succession was so flawed as a finale #I know nothing will compare to Bridge to the Turnabout from AA3 #well except for maybe the TGAA finale #but COME ON #that finale was not earned #and klavier? cool character but what happened to being upset when you lose? #What happened to the amazing writing for Edgeworth #Von Karma #and Godot? #Why does Apollo (and the player by extension) need to be babied for the entire game? #Why does everything feel so unsatisfying? #Someone please listen to me I need to rant #Ace Attorney #apollo justice #apollo justice: ace attorney #ajaa #ajaa spoilers

[nebjamin]

#would it be funny or stupid to start calling people poop goblins and wank suckers #you’re such a poop goblin bro #what a wank sucker #yeah it’s funny

[nebjamin]

God I fucking hate Olaf the snowman so fucking much holy shit. Holy shit, every frame he's in, every scene, every gif, every jpeg, he's got this painfully vacant, stupid as shit, fuckass look on his stupid lumpy face. Absolutely no part of his ugly as sin piece of shit character design is endearing. His stupid fucking legs? Who the hell makes a snowman with legs. His dumb flaily fucking twig arms? His shitty, lumpy bastard head? The three thousand percent unnecessary dumbass shitass fucking SNOW BUCK TOOTH that no snowman has EVER FUCKING HAD IN tHE HISTORY OF GOD'S GREEN FUCKING EARTH? God, I hate him. I hate him so much. So FUCKING much. Every time I see a stuffed toy Olaf or an Olaf gif or a shitty goddamn commercial, it ignites my primal rage response and I'm overcome by the need to punt this shitty little homunculus into the fucking sun. "Bhurr blur, I'm Olaf the fuckshit snow fucker, I like warm hugs". Fuck you. Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you. You look like Tow Mater summoned a patronus. Your dumb fucking twig hair makes your whole shitty head look like a hairy skin tag. I hate your dumb fucking lumpy carrot nose and your stupid, empty googly eyes and your over-the-top goofy ass upbeat asshole personality. Any scene he's sad it invokes all the wrath and fury of a spoiled child having a meltdown over a chocolate bar in a w*lmart checkout line. And I know its irrational. That's the worst part. I know he's just a shitty fucking side character in a stupid fucking children's movie, I know it doesn't matter, I know I shouldn't care. But that's part of the problem. The part where no matter the might and fury of my hatred, the locus of my homicidal intent is alltogether inconsequential. I find myself laying awake in the dark in the early hours of the morning consumed by the spirit of Wrath itself, all the force and might of a flaming hurricane directed at a bottle of piss in a ditch by the highway. The absurdity of it all burns me to my core. What better things could this energy be directed towards? And yet my disdain for this stupid, useless, insubstantial failure of endearing character design utterly eclipses the intrigue of all other pursuits. I hate him. I hate him on a level of my mind reserved for the worst of the world's array of sinners, and I can't even begin to justify it. Shitstick the snow dick is, for all intents and purposes, the animated corpse of all of humanity's saccharine pretenses- every condescending, passive-aggressive statement of meaningless upper middle class suburban drama distilled into a single, hateable form. The fucking. Fuck. I have no words. There is no cuss or epithet in any language that can encapsulate the height of the emotions I am experiencing. God, I hate him so much. I hate him so, so fucking much. I want to light his ugly little dumpster body on fire. I want to graphically beat him to death with his own stupid fucking nose. I want to punch him to death. You know that weird feeling you get, when you see a picture of something so cute you find yourself overcome with the bizarre, inexplicable urge to squeeze it? It's EXACTLY like that, except instead of cuteness it's disgust. The wordless knowledge that his existence as a fictional work is evidence of all the failures of mankind. I find myself possessed by the will of a Holy Angel gone rogue with the belief that God has made a mistake, and I alone must correct it. This is the trial by which Samael himself fell from grace. This wild, meaningless rage. A thousand blades of shining steel cast with inhuman force in the direction of a plastic grocery bag floating on a breeze. What horrors must I have committed in a past life to be plagued by this torment now? I must Unmake this fictional snowman

#the sheer amount of passion #I love this type of post so much #This makes me want to be a better writer #olaf

[nebjamin]

Is that the fucking yakuza font

#I know this is a very obscure fan base intersection but I can’t not talk about this #what would a Dallon boss fight even be #it would have a banger boss theme I can tell you that much #yakuza #like a dragon #like a dragon infinite wealth #yakuza shitpost #kazuma kiryu #video games #idkhow #I don’t know how but they found me #gloom division #dallon weekes

[nebjamin]

i hope death is like being carried to your bedroom when you were a child & fell asleep on the couch during a family party. i hope you can hear the laughter from the next room

#you can’t just emotionally destroy me at 2 pm on a weekday like that #persona 3 spoilers #persona 3 #persona 3 reload

[nebjamin]

#me when that one player cancels for the third week in a row #dnd #dm problems

[nebjamin]

i love when characters don't get to die

#kazuma kiryu #kiryu kazuma #yakuza #like a dragon

[nebjamin]

It just hit midnight here so we are officially 1 week left of no gloom division

#I’ve listened to that preview of DOWNSIDE more times than I want to admit #and the three songs we have are all amazing #my expectations are through the roof #and now it’s only a week away!!!!!!! #gloom division #idkhow #i don't know how but they found me

[nebjamin]

the dm experience of getting messages from your player's saying, "what if we did this fucked up thing to my guy?" and my immediate reaction being, "babes I would LOVE to inflict the fucked up thing on your guy."

#literally me #except my reaction is usually “oh shit how did they know I was gonna do that anyway #we are all on the exact same wavelength and it scares me #great minds think alike I guess??? #dnd #dming #dming is hard

[nebjamin]

Who made the decision to let Like A Dragon Infinite Wealth AND Apollo Justice Ace Attorney Trilogy launch on the same day. AND THEN Persona 3 Reload launches a week after.

I’m actually not going to have time to do anything else oh my GOD I love all of these characters

#JANUARY 25 #SO MUCH #PEAK FICTION #ALL AT ONCE #OH MY GOD #yakuza #like a dragon #infinite wealth #like a dragon infinite wealth #ichiban kasuga #kazuma kiryu #Ace attorney #Apollo justice ace attorney trilogy #apollo justice #phoenix wright #persona #persona 3 #persona 3 reload #there’s no way I’m naming all the SEES members in the tags #video games