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crossroadsandloudmusic · 2 years

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Hey y’all!! Finished this request up for anon. Anon, if you are still out there I hope you enjoy the fic! I loved your idea and ran with it, I hope it is to your liking!!!!

Anyways, I’ll be writing some more later this week and if I’m being honest it is prolly just going to be Yandere/smut. I have a prompt list as long as my arm and I’ll be getting started on that here soon.

Let me know if y’all have suggestions as to what I should write!

As always request are always open!!

Tips/criticism welcome!!!!

Please enjoy!!

warnings: fluff, swords, blood, graphic descriptions of gore, death, (etc.)

The sunlight illuminated the light gray room; it was well into morning now. And although it made him sick to be in bed this late, Tanjiro was ordered to be on bed rest for the next couple of days. Laying on his back he stared at the ceiling wondering how the rest of the team were recovering. Inosuke laid to his right, still loudly snoring. He had only suffered minor fractures such as a few broken ribs. Zenitsu’s injuries on the other hand, remained to be unknown as he was asleep on arrival and still was sleeping now. But then a more troubling thought came to mind. What happened to (y/n)? The last thing he remembered was seeing you charge across the battlefield, the handle of your katana in one hand and the actual blade itself in the other. It had been broken by the demon you were all fighting; you had pinned the demon to the ground and held the blade horizontally. You intend to mash the blade into his neck with brute strength, in the process you cut the demon’s hands and fingers into ribbons. Most importantly you snapped your blade.

Slowly the memories came back to Tanjiro, as he remembered that immediately following this the demon fled trying to get away from you as fast as he could. He could see your reckless bloodlust and knew if he stuck around any longer he wouldn’t live to see another day. Tanjiro’s last memory was that of you covered in your own blood wielding the fractured sword, running after the demon. He remembered your deadly laughter as you pursued the demon.

Breaking the calm nature of the estate, a loud commotion could be heard down the hall. It sounded as if someone were yelling and knocking things out of their way.

“I DONT NEED ANYMORE MEDICINE! AND I DONT NEED ANYMORE PHYSICAL THERAPY! I HAVE THINGS I NEED TO DO AND I CANT GET THEM DONE HERE IF IM LAYING IN BED!” Yelled a voice from down the hall.

Immediately Tanjiro sat up, recognizing the voice as your own.

“You can’t take the boys with you, they haven’t fully recovered yet!” Wailed Sumi.

“They are too weak to leave! They’ll get hurt!” Cried Naho

“Let them stay here just until they gain back all of their strength!” Pleaded Kiyo.

All three pulled at your clothes and limbs, still you moved forward. Pulling the girls behind you.

Tanjiro could hear the young girl’s begs as they got closer and closer to his door. When suddenly he heard the footsteps stop, and all was quiet for a fraction of a second.

Suddenly the door slammed open, all three of the boys jumped in unison from the noise. Zenitsu and Inosuke now wide awake and on alert searching for the sound that pulled them out of such a sweet slumber. In the doorway you stood, hands on your hips. Your uniform in tatters, your face and hands covered in bandages. Tanjiro noticed that there still appeared to be a bit of dried blood in your (h/c) hair.

“Rise and shine boys! Time to get moving!” You announced as you looked at the young men’s confused faces.

“You’re alive?!” Asked Zenitsu still shocked by you standing in their room, seemingly in a great mood, all things considered.

“Of course I’m alive! I’m the (y/b/t) pillar! A hashira! Who do you think carried you all this way, hm?” You asked Zenitsu who now was even more baffled, you were at the brink of death and you carried the three of them to safety?

“Did you kill the demon?” Asked Inosuke sitting at the end of his bed.

“You bet I did, a broken sword can’t stop me!” You said as you smiled and winked at him.

————————————————————————-

After successfully kidnapping the injured boys, you five made your way back to your own estate. There the five of you had been staying as you were taking them under your wing and training them.

Your training was a bit unconventional, as instead of training them as if you were a wise master you trained from the heart. You fought from the heart, you let your undying hatred and insatiable bloodlust take control of your body. This resulted in you being known as reckless and erratic, many did not admire these qualities because they felt you lacked discipline and control. Which wasn’t far from the truth, but this was who you are and you weren’t going to change that because someone didn’t like the way you handled business.

Also with your rash fighting style came the problem of wielding your sword correctly. Instead of seeing it as a beautiful extension of your body, you saw it as a tool. A sharp tool that cuts and kills, and sometimes tools break. And when a tool breaks you get another one. That’s just how you saw it and the blacksmith never seemed to care much, besides you were giving him plenty of business were you not?

“So what happened after you broke your sword?” Questioned Tanjiro as you four sat inside your home.

“Well, I picked up the pieces, chased after that demon till I caught him and then I cut his head off as he begged for mercy.” You said in a matter-of-fact tone; taking a sip of your tea as if you were discussing the weather. Zenitsu shuddered at your coldness, you terrified him. Inosuke laughed and cheered at your response.

Tanjiro sat and thought quietly, it was intense how cold blooded you were. Still though you weren’t like this with everyone and every demon. He noticed how caring you could be to them and even though you were reluctant about Nezuko, you never said an ill word to or about her. Even when you first met you had always been welcoming, regardless if you were a little nervous about her.

Then a sickening thought came to his mind. Your sword. You had broken your sword. That means Hotaru Haganezuka would be bringing you another. He trembled at the thought.

“You…you...you broke your sword right? What are you going to do?” Tanjiro asked, clearly distressed.

You cocked your eyebrow as if to ask why he was acting so nervous.

“What do you mean? I’ll just get Hotaru to make me another one, duh.” You said blatantly.

“Wha...wha… What do you mean just get him to make you another? Have you ever met Hotaru?!” He almost yelled.

“Well of course I have! Why are you making such a big deal, the guy is a blacksmith, he makes swords. I broke mine so I’ll just get him to make me a new one. He’s done it before.” You said, still confused at Tanjiro’s sudden change in behavior.

“Besides, he’s coming over this afternoon to get the pieces of my old one so he can make the new one.” You said taking another sip of your tea.

“He’s coming here!? This afternoon?! Before?! How many swords have you broken?!” He questioned loudly.

“Eh, I don’t know. Five, maybe six, more or less.” You replied nonchalantly. Tanjiro almost collapsed, he had broken one and lost another. Hotaru intended to beat him to a pulp the first time, and the second time Tanjiro was sure he was going to kill him. But you. You had broken five of his swords. Five of his masterpieces. Hotaru would surely stop at nothing to exact his revenge. Five swords was no longer punishable by death, but instead cruel and unusual torture. Tanjiro would be terrified but he would protect you at all costs.

————————————————————————-

As the three you sat, and enjoyed what was a relaxing evening a knock came at the door. Tanjiro stiffened and stood up with you. You gave him another confused glance and approached the door. He waited with baited breath, he expected at any moment Hotaru would burst through that door with two large knives in hand.

When you reached the door, Tanjiro assumed a fighting stance. He would be ready for anything.

You opened the door and smiled.

“Haganezuka! It’s good to see you again! Please come in!”

————————————————————————-

This was terrifying, absolutely terrifying.

Hotaru stood quietly and awaited your return patiently. You went to retrieve the shards of your previous sword and asked to wait just a second while you got them, to which he immediately obliged and had since stood almost perfectly still.

Perhaps he was so angry he was calm? Maybe he was waiting till you came back before he attacked? Regardless of what trick he had up his sleeve Tanjiro stood ready for anything.

Yet nothing came, instead you came back and handed him the pieces in a small burlap sack.

“Here it is! Everything is in there, even the handle. I look forward to getting my new one!” You said with a smile as you handed him the sack.

Hotaru took the sack from your hands and held it closely, he bowed deeply and said

“Thank you, (L/n)san. I will begin my work right away. Your swords take priority.”

Thank you? Right away? Priority?

Tanjiro was dumbfounded, this was not the Hotaru he had met before. The Hotaru he met would have chased you for hours on end and if he caught you. You would have been unrecognizable. But this Hotaru waited patiently and was polite. What was even more disturbing was that this Hotaru almost seemed to adore you?

The way he waited, the way he gratefully accepted your broken sword, the way he spoke to you, the way he watched your every move. All of it was so peculiar, did Hotaru favor you in a way?

You walked Hotaru outside and on the engawa you shared some parting words.

“Have a safe trip back! It’s been so good seeing you again, Hotaru.” You said as you pulled Hotaru into a warm embrace.

This is what he had been craving. Your touch, your voice, your scent. He held you close to him until you pulled away, immediately he missed your touch. He knows it was only a friendly gesture but he couldn’t help but want it more, he wanted you close to him always. Forever and ever beside him. But until he had the guts to truly confess his love for you, he’d have to settle with making you a new sword every time you needed one. He’d make a thousand swords for you, if he could experience these small but sweet interactions.

“I will be back in several days. I will forge only the best for you, a sword that will be worthy for you to hold.” Hotaru spoke quietly as he bowed once more.

“You always do.” You said with a smile that never failed to melt his heart. He was grateful for his mask or else you’d surely see the blushing mess he was.

Hotaru took his leave and disappeared down the trail.

As you stepped back inside you whispered to yourself

“Such a sweet guy, why hasn’t someone snatched him up and made him a husband yet?”

————————————————————————-

“I don’t know what you were so worried about Tanjiro, Hotaru is always so polite.” You said as you walked through the door. Tanjiro now sat with his legs crossed, the most perplexed look on his face.

————————————————————————-

As soon as Hotaru made it back to his home, he threw himself into his work. He would work for hours on end, never once taking a break. This was for you, this would be for you. He’d pour his heart and soul into this sword, the sword you would carry into battle.

————————————————————————-

“AND HE HASN’T EVER CHASED YOU FOR HOURS?!” Tanjiro raged.

“Hm...No, not that I recall.” You absentmindedly answered while flipping through your book.

“HE NEVER THREATENED TO MURDER YOU?!”

“No, not once.”

Tanjiro’s reactions to your replies made you laugh internally. You knew that Hotaru had a reputation of overreacting to his swords being destroyed by the younger slayers. Still Tanjiro didn’t have to know that you knew.

“Tanjiro, I just don’t believe that Hotaru would do something like that. You saw how polite he was this afternoon.” You said still not looking from your book.

“I KNOW THATS MY POINT! HAD IT BEEN ME WHO BROKE MY SWORD HE WOULD HAVE CHASED ME UNTIL SUNSET!” Yelled Tanjiro.

“See that’s the thing I don’t understand. You were here this afternoon when he came by, and he didn’t chase or harass you then.” You said still wanting your little game to continue.

“He didn’t notice anyone else was here.” Said Zenitsu as he chewed on some ohagi.

After understanding what Zenitsu meant by his comment a slight blush ran across your face. The thought that Hotaru had only been focused on you made your heart jump. He has always been so kind to you, and he never once complained about consistently having to make you new swords. Maybe, Hotaru did have feelings for you. That was ridiculous, surely you would have noticed before now, right? Then again why had he always treated you so kindly?

The idea that Hotaru had taken a liking to you wasn’t a bad thought. In fact, you could feel your heart flutter at the thought of you two being a bit more friendly with one another. And he was quite attractive, at least from the bit that you saw of him. He was muscular and rather tall as well, underneath the spotted cloth on his head you could see strands of long black hair. Every time he came to deliver your new sword you hoped you would get a glance of his face.

Lost deep in thought you hadn’t realized how quiet the room had gotten. When you looked up from your book you saw Tanjiro, Zenitsu, and Inosuke all staring with cheeky grins; giggling like schoolgirls. It was obvious they had seen you blush at the thought that Hotaru was interested in you.

“WHAT ARE ALL YOU LOOKING AT?!” You yelled as you jumped up out of your chair.

“I DONT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT HOTARU IS JUST NICE!” You said before running out of the house. The boys erupted in laughter.

————————————————————————-

“Did you see the way she was blushing?” Asked Tanjiro as he cleaned the floors; running back and forth in front of Zenitsu who was seated on a cushion.

“I guess she didn’t realize Hotaru had the hots for her.” Zenitsu said.

Suddenly Tanjiro stopped and smiled the biggest smile he could.

“Zenitsu! I have a wonderful idea! We should get them together!” He beamed feeling brilliant after coming up with such an idea.

“WHAT?! AND RISK FEELING THE WRATH OF (Y/N) AND HOTARU?! ARE YOU INSANE?!” Yelled Zenitsu angry Tanjiro would be putting him in such a dangerous situation. His vision of you in his mind was of you standing in a lawless battlefield surrounded by flames, sword in hand ready to cut down anyone who crossed you. He shivered at the thought.

“Just think about it Zenitsu! Imagine how happy they’d be together! Besides, Hotaru is always working on his swords and (y/n) is always on missions. Maybe they need something a little more...normal?” Said Tanjiro with a bit of sympathy in his voice. It was true, you were always on missions, in fact this was the first time you had been home in months; your house was covered in a thick layer of dust. There was no doubt that you loved exterminating demons, but the reason you were obsessed with killing them was a little more deeper than that. The day you became a slayer your promised yourself that you would stop at nothing to avenge the ones you loved, your family, your friends, the entire village. All of which had been destroyed; you stood in wreckage gathering all the bodies you could find. One by one you would bury your entire town. After everyone received a final resting place and a proper funeral you would then search for a way. A way to bring them comfort in the afterlife.

“Will you help me?”

“Fine, I’ll help you. BUT IF (Y/N) OR HOTARU GET ANGRY I'M TELLING THEM IT WAS YOUR IDEA!”

————————————————————————-

Together the three devised a plan that would be the envy of most any man. They would send a fake mission through your crow, saying that there was a demon on the prowl in the wisteria grove. After hearing this you would send a message to Hotaru asking him to put a rush on that sword and meet you there. Before this they will have adorned the trees with lanterns, strings of flowers, and beautiful vines. And when the two of you met in the middle, they’d ignite the lanterns to illuminate the scene. A place so romantic you both would have no choice but to confess your love for each other!

Quickly they got to work. Tanjiro ordered Inosuke to climb each tree and place a lantern on the lowest branches, after he was done each tree had two lanterns. Zenitsu was to collect as many willow vines as he could, then he would braid them making long thick vines that would hang from the trees and create almost a curtain. Tanjiro was on the hunt for the most beautiful smelling flowers, of course he grabbed some wisteria but he also collected tons of wild flowers he had seen in the area. He made bunches of glorious bouquets to hang in the trees, in the middle of the vine guarded circle he sprinkled hundreds of flower petals. The sight was delightful, the boys had put in so much work into this. Now their only hope was that neither of you two killed them after finding out their plan.

After putting the finishing touches on their creation they rushed back to your estate to enact the second part of their plan.

“Please, we need you to do this for us. What do you want? We will give you anything! How about birdseed? How about worms, we will get on our hands and knees and dig for all the grubs you want! Please just do us this little tiny favor.” Tanjiro pleaded with your crow who was pondering their request.

After much begging and negotiating, it was settled that Inosuke would dig for grubs and get as many as he could find, Zenitsu would give him an extra scope of birdseed while you weren’t looking.

Now all they had to do was wait. You had to go to a hashira meeting and would be back before too much longer, still the wait made them anxious. Tanjiro sat drumming his fingers waiting for you to arrive, Inosuke laid out flat on the floor snoozing, while Zenitsu trembled and paced the floor.

“Tanjiro, what if they find out.” He whimpered, tears flowing from his eyes.

“They will find out! We will tell them as soon as they confess to each other!” Tanjiro said happily even though he was slightly nervous.

“Tanjiro! You didn’t tell me that!” He cried.

On the other side of the door they could hear your light footsteps, quietly you slid the door open and stepped inside.

“How was the meeting?” Tanjiro chirped with an overall enthusiastic smile on his face.

“Depressing. It is hard hearing about all the young slayers that have been killed.” You said not meeting his eyes, opting to go sit down on your futon.

“I don’t want to do anything this evening except lay here, you boys cool with that?” You asked, pulling the cover over your head.

None of the boys replied. Zenitsu ran and gripped Tanjiro’s haori. Both looked at each other with worried expressions.

Perhaps, this was not the best time for such a ruse.

Before you could get properly settled in, the jarring sound of your crows' cries came from outside. Instantly you jumped from your bed and ran to your closet. First you grabbed your slayer uniform, then your belt. You ran down the hall and into your separate room to change. In a flash you were dressed, for one last final touch you slipped on your tabi boots; fastening them as you fled to the door. You crashed through the door and out into the yard, you searched the sky till you spotted your crow.

“Hey! What’s the big idea? I don’t have a sword yet!” You yelled to your crow who was making small circles in the sky.

“Southeast! Southeast! Head southeast!” The crow called as he refused to elaborate.

“Go to Hotaru Haganezuka! Tell him to put a rush on that sword and meet me there. Tanjiro, Zenitsu, Inosuke!”

All three boys ran out onto the engawa, dressed with swords at their hips.

“Follow me, we have a mission. Let’s go!”

————————————————————————-

Together you ran, the boys a couple lengths behind you. Tanjiro’s crow led the way and soon you’d all arrive to your destiny.

————————————————————————-

Your crow flew hard and fast, when you gave him orders he always intended to follow through to the best of his ability, even if he was bribed into misleading you.

After a long flight he arrived at Hotaru's home, outside he cawed hoping to alert the man inside.

Hotaru had been hard at work forging your new sword; he intended on making it absolutely perfect. Therefore it was nowhere near finished, even after the countless hours and days he pushed himself to work.

The sound of a Kasugai crow calling his name broke him out of trance. Already enraged that no doubt the crow was coming to report a slayer had broken one his swords, he stormed outside slamming his door behind him. But before he could voice his exasperation the crow spoke,

“The (y/b/t) pillar! (Y/n)! She needs her sword! She’s on her way to a mission! Meet her at the wisteria grove Southeast!” Your crow called.

Hotaru’s heart sank, you were going into battle now? And you had nothing but your bare hands to defend yourself with, he’d have to improvise. With all his speed he ran inside; he tore his forge apart. He couldn’t possibly expect you to wield a half made sword, it was still glowing hot and lacked a handle. He fumbled through everything till he found them; a pair of wakizashi swords he made as a prototype for a previous hashira. They were not your usual weapon of choice, but they had been forged by the same metal as his katanas; he knew you’d have no trouble wielding them.

Throwing them into a wooden case, he wrapped them in a soft cloth. Hurriedly he slammed the case closed and threw it over his shoulder as he bolted out the door.

————————————————————————-

He followed your crow with great determination, he wasn’t going to fail you. Even so the most dreadful thoughts came to his mind. What if he arrived too late? What if his last sight of you was the life leaving your body? This pushed him to go harder, he would not leave you empty handed.

He forced those terrible thoughts out of his mind, the only thing he thought about now was his breathing. In and out, in and out.

————————————————————————-

“I’ll be meeting Hotaru here, you boys search the area. Tanjiro and Zenitsu search the village, Inosuke search the woods.” You ordered.

“Yes!” All three said in unison. Due to how seriously you were taking this impromptu mission, the boys got a little caught up in it too. Tanjiro had become a lot more serious and concerned even though he had concocted the fake mission. He turned to look at Zenitsu who was staring at you trembling.

“But (y/n), you don’t have a sword, what are you going to do if the demon shows up?” He asked, tears flowing from his eyes.

“Don’t you know anything about me Zenitsu? I’ve always got a trick up my sleeve.” You said with a sly smirk. You pulled back your sleeve to reveal three insanely sharp throwing knives; each one had a purple tip. Little did Zenitsu know these knives were laced with wisteria; a small touch both you and Shinobu worked on.

“Come on hurry, Zenitsu. We have to go.” Tanjiro said while pulling him by the collar of his haori.

“But Tanjiro! What are we going to do if she gets hurt!” He cried.

Once out of earshot, Tanjiro pulled Zenitsu aside.

“We’ve got to stick to the original plan, remember? Hotaru will be here any minute and we’ve got to be ready!” Tanjiro said with a bright smile.

“First we will go patrol the village, then by the time we get back Hotaru will surely have made it.”

Together they took off towards the village.

————————————————————————-

The wait was long and uneventful, you sat at the edge of the grove making patterns in the soft dirt. This was weird, all of it was, why were you given a mission on such short notice. Wouldn’t Master Kagaya have said something during the meeting, besides he knew you didn’t have a sword. Something was not right and it made you nervous. You stood to the sound of your crow calling, they must be close you thought to yourself.

You watched the sky patiently, over the horizon your bird came into view. He flew straight till he met the middle of the wisteria grove, to which he swooped in and landed.

————————————————————————-

“Hotaru? Hotaru? Hotaru?” You called as you parted what seemed to be a curtain of vines. When you stepped inside your eyes searched in the darkness, you could barely make out a thing. Slowly you backed up, anticipating an attack from any direction.

Suddenly a twig snapped from behind you, pinpointing exactly where the sound originated, you dipped and swept your leg. First a loud thud hit the ground followed by a low groan.

————————————————————————

“Zenitsu, has (y/n) made it inside yet?” Tanjiro loudly whispered

“OH NO! IT SOUNDS LIKE SHE’S BEATING HIM UP!” Yelled Zenitsu after hearing your attack.

“INOSUKE! LIGHT THE LANTERNS!” Tanjiro ordered.

In a flash, Inosuke jumped from his perch high in an oak tree. On his way down he lit a match on the roof of his mouth, when he made his way to the ground he found the fuse that connected all the lanterns together.

As soon as the match touched the end of the fuse a bright spark appeared zoomed down the line causing everything in its wake to turn to ash. They lost sight of the spark as it quickly rounded the corner and into the bush; a bright light illuminated the otherside.

————————————————————————-

“Oh Hotaru! I'm som sorry! I had no idea it was you, here let me help you up!” You said apologetically as you helped Hotaru off of the ground.

“No, no, no I should have said something so as not to catch you so off guard.” He replied. The truth was that he had been so captivated by you. You left him speechless.

“How was the tri-oh.” You caught his eyes, this had been the first time you had seen him without his mask. He looked at you confused till he realized his mistake, he had been in such a rush he had forgotten his mask. He was handsome, very handsome at that. His long dark hair flowed to his shoulders, his dark eyebrows perfectly rested above his sharp eyes. After staring at him for what seemed like ages you snapped out of your trance.

“Oh! Oh no! I’m sorry! Again! Here I’ll cover my eyes!” You said as you turned your back to him covering your eyes.

“No it’s alright, I don’t mind if you see me!” He said he reached out for you. He pulled your hands away from your eyes and held them gently. He smiled when he met your gaze. How pretty you looked in the soft orange light, your (h/c) shimmering in the dance of the flames.

‘Such a beautiful sight’ he thought to himself as his thumb gently rubbed the top of your hand.

“Hotaru? You wouldn’t have my sword with you do you?” You asked, peering at the box that had been knocked out of his hands when he fell.

“Of course, (L/n)san! Please, excuse me.” He said sheepishly as he reached for the box.

“Well, they aren’t exactly your sword but I had these two, they are one of the first ones I made for Uzui Tengen. I’m sorry, (y/n). I wasn’t able to make your sword in time.” He said as he bowed, holding the swords up to you. You took them in your hands and swung them simultaneously.

“Flashy. I like em, Hotaru. Mind if I keep em.” You asked, admiring the weapons in your hands.

Hotaru looked up at you, in his eyes there wasn’t a more glorious scene. You held his creation with such pride and joy.

He didn’t care that you were reckless, and wild. In his eyes you were a symbol of beauty and strength, someone as perfect as you should not exist in the real world; only in books and folktales.

“These swords are just about as beautiful as how you’ve decorated the trees. You getting sweet on me, Hotaru?” You asked observing the vines and trees all decorated with flowers.

“The lanterns are a nice touch, it looks like you put a lot of hard work into all this. This is very nice.” You said as you continued to look around you.

“What’s the occasion?” You asked, turning to look at Hotaru who stood with his hands behind his back. He looked at you confused, you had thought he had put all this together? For you? Seeing you so pleased by this made him curse himself for not coming up with a similar gesture.

“I...I...I-” Hotaru stuttered before loud running could be heard tearing through the brush.

“(Y/n)! (Y/n)! (Y/n)!” Called Tanjiro from the otherside of the vines. Soon Zenitsu, Inosuke, and Tanjiro with Nezuko in tow, fell through the barrier.

“What’s going on? Did you find the demon?” You asked.

“No, the village and forest were all clear! What should we do now?” They asked. Their gaze then turned to Hotaru who was sheepishly standing behind you waiting for your attention once more. All three boys began to grin and giggle amongst themselves. You took in the situation and blushed slightly from their reaction.

“Are we interrupting something?” Asked Zenitsu with a sly grin. To which Inosuke began to laugh from seeing your reaction.

“Zenitsu! Inosuke! Come on, they are clearly having a romantic conversation that we should not interfere with! They would like to talk in private!” Tanjiro said confidently as he hoisted Zenitsu and Inosuke under his arms.

“Oooooo Hotaru! How romantic! Such a beautiful place to have a date!” Yelled Inosuke and Zenitsu as they were being carried away. Hotaru blushed at their comments and had you not been standing so close he would have chased them till they collapsed. But before the boys were out of sight they turned to look at Hotaru, they all three grinned widely and held up their thumbs. Tanjiro mouthed the words,

‘You got this!’ Before shoving both of his thumbs in the air.

They were...helping him? They had pulled this all together to help him? Surely not, especially after how many times he threatened to kill Tanjiro. This had to be deeper than that, why else would they go out of their way to make such a gesture? Unless...you felt the same way towards him? Quickly he pushed the idea out of his head, there was no way you felt so warmly towards him. He was just your swordsmith, the person behind the scenes. You were an achieved warrior, someone who others could look to in a time of need.

“Hotaru? Did you put this all together for me?” You asked, tearing him away from his thoughts.

“I-I did!” He stammered out quickly.

“What was the reason for such a gesture? Is there something you would like to tell me?” You asked Hotaru, turning to face him. Although you kept a cool exterior, inside your heart was doing flips. Was he about to confess to you? Was this what you had been looking for all along? Perhaps, revenge and justice wouldn’t fill the whole in you but maybe affection and acceptance would?

“(Y/n), I have something I have to tell you.” He spoke clearly now and stood tall. Now was his chance to lay everything out that had been on his heart.

“I’m tired of living like this. I’m tired of hiding behind my mask. I’m tired of only being near you when I bring you another sword. No, I’m done living like this.” He said before he approached you and pulled you to his chest by your arms; blades falling from your hands.

“Hotaru? What are you-” his lips cut off your words before another one could be uttered. He pulled you into such a passionate kiss, a one that conveyed years of pent up emotions. All came flowing out in an instant.

You melted in his embrace, his hands moved from your arms to your face. He cupped your head so gently. His touch was full of love and adoration. Never in your life had you felt such a feeling. This had been everything you had been looking for.

Slowly he pulled away, still holding your face. In the distance quiet cheers could be heard.

————————————————————————-

When you entered your home your eyes immediately looked for the boys. The three sat side by side grinning from ear to ear. You put your hands to your hips and donned a serious look.

“Is there something you boys would like to tell me?” You questioned.

You knew the boys were behind it all, and still you played along. Because in the end, you got everything you had ever dreamed of wanting. And it wasn’t revenge, justice, or vengeance, but a chance to live. To live not for those who passed but for yourself.

Yours and Hotaru’s relationship blossomed from that day forth. Days after missions were spent together, oftentimes you stayed with him when you were home.

You’d sit and watch as he’d forge his blades with incredible passion. After the day was long over, and you convinced him he worked hard enough, the two of you would spend your evenings in each other's arms; always falling asleep entangled with one another.

You were his pride and joy. You sat so patiently, watching him work.

‘Such a pretty thing’ he thought to himself when he happened to steal a glance. Of course, he still made you a new sword whenever you needed one, but now he could impose a “punishment” he saw fit. Then again he never heard you complain.

“Hotaru! It’s me! I’m back! Hotaru?” You called as you entered his home, your last mission had been long and time consuming so once it was finished you immediately ran home.

As you walked in, Hotaru rounded the corner from his room with his hands behind his back.

“Close your eyes, my spiderlily. I have a surprise for you.” He came behind you and put his hand over your eyes. You jittered with excitement. His other hand moved in front of you.

“Now open them.” He said softly as he withdrew his hand from in front of your face.

In his hand was a beautiful bundle of wild flowers and wisteria blossoms, fresh from the spring weather.

You squealed and jumped with joy, you immediately wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling Hotaru in a smothering embrace. He buried his head into your neck and squeezed you back even harder.

“Oh Hotaru, they are just like the ones from the grove! They are beautiful! I love them so much!” You cried as you held them close and smelled them.

“I may have had some help.” Hotaru replied with a wide smile across his face.

“They are perfect!”

“You are perfect.”

#hotaru haganezuka #hashira x reader #demon slayer requests #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer #hotaru x reader #hotaru haganezuka x reader #demon slayer Hotaru #hashira headcannons

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neoaevis · 3 years

Note

Fluff 3 and Smut 50 with haechan request, thank youu!❤

Heyy bby this is for you hope you enjoy and I hope the outcome is how you picture it or at least close to how you picture it, if there are typos forgive me I only wrote this on my phone💋

Warnings: Daddy Kink,Pregnant Sex,Unprotected Sex(Wrap it up bishh),Insecurity,Smut,Smut,Smut(that's it I guess¿)

#3:Your Pretty Even If You’re Pregnant

#50: Call Me Daddy

Being pregnant brought your utmost insecurity, mostly when you buy clothes and eating, being pregnant means having to buy the biggest size possible for your growing belly, and for having a weird craving and weird eating time also due to your insecurity you and Haechan have restrained from having sex but mostly you, he sometimes offer it but you refuse.

One night you were rummaging over your old clothes that you used to like but you felt so depressed because none of them fits you and it pains your husband to see you like that so he tries to comfort you by sitting down beside you and giving you some sugary words.

“Haechan it’s weird isn’t it there is a baby inside me and it’s so big” you said as you wipe of your tears

“No it’s actually amazing” he said smiling at you

“But Im so big now and everything is so different which makes me afraid” you said as you feel like tearing up again, which happens all the time during your pregnancy.

“Your Pretty Even If You’re Pregnant” he said with sincerity as he held your cheeks and gives you a kiss on your lips, it makes you blush as if you were a highschool girl again, like it’s your first time being kissed.

The kiss was gentle and loving for a few minutes, then you slinged your arms in his neck, you open your mouth for a second to breath and he seizes the opportunity to deepen the kiss and the next moves were no longer gentle, his hands explored your body from your thighs till your belly rubbing it gently before letting go “I want you Y/N” your insecurity was eating you up again having thoughts that what if you can be like before what if it turns him off seeing your big belly while having sex, Haechan seems to notice this and gives you a reassuring smile “It’s ok Y/N we don’t have to if you don’t like” he said while standing up “N-no Haechan I-I want you too” you stood as you grab his face kissing him, he then carries you to the bed kissing every exposed skin you have as he tugs your shirt seemingly asking for permission in which you gave a nod your belly was big but Haechan did not mind a bit instead was happy to have a little one that’s part you and part him growing inside to you, he gives your belly a peck until up to your breast unclasping the strap at the back, first he massaged your breast before sucking it giving both boobs equal attention, you feel your breast going hard as he sucks you, after giving it satisfaction he now trails down until he was met with your panty giving your clit a kiss and slowly removing it and damn it was soo hot for you to see. Hachan started by licking your clit to sucking it with the most gentleness he can, which makes you moan the more he sucks the more you keep wanting more.

"Hae-haechan please" you said whimpering needy for his touch

"Tell me what you want baby" he said as he stopped what he was doing

"I want your finger inside please" you begged him and he agrees to your request by pushing one finger inside and sucking your clit, the scene was so erotic that you feel a know in the pit of your stomach

"Your cumming this soon, I've barely touched you" he said boosting his ego as he inserts another finger fastening his pace making you whimper from the pleasure, loud sounds of moans and skin to skin sounds resonated through the room and soon after you came undone in his touch.

You felt too good from his touch and you wanted to return the favor so you grabbed his dick within his cloth earning a groan from him "I want to suck you off" you said looking at him

He rested his body in the bed while you settle in between his legs, you pull his shorts down along his boxer and you were welcomed with his fully erect dick leaking with pre-cum, you give it a lick which makes Heachan whimper, you suck him of slowly but deep while looking into his eyes up and down you go slowly which is so painful for Haechan so he grabbed you hair in a makeshift ponytail and pulls you toward his face "Baby you would need to go faster I won't be able to take it if you go more slower" he said as he now pull you towards his dick pushing you really deep and it touch your throat and you cried due to the pain and lust you felt he then pulls you up next he thrusted into you while he makes you suck him deep everytime and faster as time passes by "Oh shit shit shit Im close" he then burst inside you making you feel the salty beads of his cum.

As he recovers from his climax the next thing you do is sit on his lap getting hold of his dick and pushing it inside of you you started in a slow pace feeling his dick inside you once again and you kiss him in his lips feeling every love he gives, everything about him was pleasurable you thought to yourself, you were too drunk in pleasure when you blurted out "Daddy" which makes Haechan stop shook at what you said, he had this though that you might want things to be rough, he then get's a hold of your neck to make you face him "Call me Daddy" he ordered you "Daddy" you obliged to him making him smirk with a full on ego he thrusts inside you "Your such a whore baby" he said as you whimper in each of his thurst and soon he places you on below him on a missionary position making you yelp "Daddy will fuck you so good baby" he said and you actually loved it, the pleasure was too much for you too handle and so you felt you second climax you clench"Da-daddy I-I I am cu-cumming" you said unable to stop yourself from stuttering " Wait for me baby I-m almost there" he thrusts inside you in full speed in a minute his pace slows down signalling he is almost cumming "Together baby" and so you both came together, he filled you up with his seed as he gives you three sharp thrusts, after he pulls out he lays on his stomach beside you, while you were dripping beside him catching your breath.

Haechan chuckles facing you "You should call me daddy more, it feels so good and makes me more excited for our baby" he grabs a hold of you spooning you onto a hug

"Thanks for today, and all the days Haechan, I know you prolly used a lot of patience on me" you said as you felt guilty towards him

"Im always here for you" he said as he gives you kisses in your neck and your shoulder even your cheek before he gets up to grab a towel and clean you up.

After that the both of you fell asleep with each others arms.

#nct 127 #nct dream #nct imagines #nct scenarios #nct smut #haechan smut #nct angst #nct fluff #neosmutcollective

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akakeiiji · 4 years

Note

Hi! This is my first time requesting something, i was wondering if you could do headcanons or reactions for Oikawa, Akaashi, Atsumu, sugawara and Nishinoya who have an s/o who is a medical student and works as a paramedic in her free time and tends their injuries after games or durning them, especially oikawa 😔🙏🏻

Omg anon, if this ask is based off of you then you are amazing!! Keep up the great work!

Also I finally broke through my creative block and actually wrote something, I actually finished these hcs a few days ago but my laptop died before I could post so I had to start from scratch huhu (having to start over drained me so much hence why this took so long to post)

✂︎・・・masterlist

-`,✎Oikawa, Akaashi, Atsumu, Sugawara and Nishinoya’s reaction to their S/O tending to their injuries

Oikawa Tooru

Oikawa is the king of overworking himself

Even when he doesn’t have any matches to worry about, he’s in the gym practicing and practicing till he physically can’t anymore

It’s no wonder why he gets injured a lot, he just never knows when to stop

If it weren’t for you his body would be in horrible shape

You always know what to say and do to get him to stop practicing for the day, and you’re always the one tending to his sore and exhausted body ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

He loves flexing you, he needs everyone to know how smart you are

When I say everyone, I mean everyone

You turn around for a bit and he’s suddenly telling the cashier how amazing you are for being a paramedic

Contrary to popular belief, Oikawa is actually very smart so sometimes he’ll study with you in his free time, helping you out by quizzing you and stuff

He studies your material sometimes, idly reading through your papers and textbooks sometimes

He’ll just randomly blurt out random medical facts, which may or may not be a ploy to impress you

One day when it was reaching the end of a match, you could tell that something was wrong with Tooru, it wasn’t obvious but you knew when he was in pain

You internally screamed at him, urging him to sit the rest of the match out but this was Oikawa you were talking about

Luckily the match ended quickly after that with Oikawa’s team winning but he almost collapses from the sheer pain he was feeling on his leg, it had been acting up again from his old injury

You were absolutely livid because it wouldn't have been so bad if he stopped playing when it started hurting but you were too worried to lecture him

There are tears prickling his eyes but he’s still smiling and telling everyone he’ll be okay because you’re there

“They’re the best of best, they’ll be able to help me!”

He’d be bedridden for a while and, of course, you’d be by his side the entire time

You scolded him for an hour and he couldn’t run away so he had to endure it all

For the first few days, everything would be okay, but after a while, he starts getting restless and keeps trying to get up to do things by himself

You would physically restrain him to the bed if you could

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

JUST KIDDING….Unless

He wants nothing more than to go back to training, he’d literally start dreaming about volleyball on some nights

You have to constantly remind him that if he doesn't recover properly he’ll just worsen his leg so that he doesn’t run away while you’re at school or at work

“If it gets worse, they might have to amputate it.”

“What?! You can’t be serious…you’re joking, right?”

Since he can’t go out or train anymore, he spends the rest of his time trying to get your attention

He’s so pouty and whiny, always calling for you for no good reason

While you’re studying in the other room, he’ll suddenly call for you saying he needs you

When you go over to him, he’ll just be like: “I need you~” and you’d have to fight the urge to strangle him

He really just wants your attention, pls help him

In all seriousness though, he’s so thankful to you and truly appreciates what you do

While you’re checking on his leg one day, he’d take your gentle hands in his and pull you in for a hug

“Thank you for putting up with me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“…also I need to pee.”

Akaashi Keiji

My son

My precious boy

It pains me to write about him getting hurt

He’s so supportive of you and your studies, he knows how hard studying medicine is

He always checks in on you when you’re studying or working

He’s the type of boyfriend that will give you little snacks while you’re working and remind you to take breaks

Whenever he feels sick or gets hurt, you’re the first one he calls because he trusts you the most and because he knows how capable you are

But this happens very rarely because he’s really careful and knows his limits

During one of his matches though, he suddenly falls over after setting a ball, clutching his leg

He’s immediately rushed over to the infirmary but when they arrive you’re already there wheezing and panting after running all the way there from the bleachers

The nurse tells you that he sprained his ankle pretty badly and that he’d recover just fine but you still felt so bad because you could see how much Akaashi was in pain

I'm legitimately hurting rn while writing this

After getting injured, he starts overthinking so fricking much

He’ll start thinking that he was pulling his team down and begin questioning his skills as a player

You literally have to slap some sense into him or he’ll just drown in his thoughts

You’ll have to cup his face in your hands and urge him to look at you while you tell him how much of an amazing player he is and how injuries like these are inevitable when playing sports

He’ll only start feeling better after this but he still needs a huge dose of your hugs and kisses to fully recover

Out of all the boys, he’s probably the easiest to take care of (he’s prolly tied with Suga)

He’s more obedient and doesn’t mind staying in bed for a long time

But at the same time, he’s so stubborn and says he doesn’t need your help

He just keeps thinking that he’s burdening you while you have so much on your plate

“I don’t need your help, love. I’m completely fine.”

“Keiji, there are literally tears in your eyes.”

He subconsciously gets clingier than usual as the days go by, always trying to get your attention

He isn’t as obvious as other ehem tooru and tries to do so in more subtle ways

Like he’ll just accidentally drop his book and when you go to pick it up he’ll pull you onto the bed and before you know it you’ve been cuddling for two hours straight

The extra affection is his own little way of saying thank you

While you’re checking on his injuries he’ll grab your hand with his and press your knuckles to his lips

“Thank you, love.”

My heart burst

Miya Atsumu

Oikawa part 2 but snarkier

He just doEsn’T kNow whEn to StOP

He always finds some nitty gritty detail he absolutely needs to fix during his regular practice and stays after hours to work on it

He can train for hours without realizing it, before he knows it it’s midnight, he’s the only soul left in the building and his legs are dying

Other times, when you arrive home to find your boyfriend missing, you immediately head over to his gym and drag him home

During a match, he dives down to save a ball only to crash on the ground awkwardly and injure his shoulder

He’s forced to leave the court after failing to convince the referee and his coach that he was fine and he was absolutely livid

Not at them but at himself

He thinks that the injury was a sign that he was slacking off or losing his edge

He goes off on a tangent about how he needs to practice more and how he can’t afford to waste time

Nobody could calm him down until you arrived

After you got there and talked some sense into him, he finally complies and lets himself be lead away to the infirmary

He’s down in the dumps for at least a week, usually found grumbling at the tv, unsure of what to do with this unprecedented free time

But soon after a lot of talks lectures with you and food sent by his brother, he starts going back to his usual old self

He’s absolutely basking in this extra attention from you, he secretly loves being doted on

It used to really irk him when he finds he can’t do certain things with his injury like opening a jar

But once it dawns on him that you’re there, he will totally abuse this just to get your attention and to bother you

“Hey, can you help me open the fridge?”

“You can do that by yourself.”

“I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU WON’T HELP YOUR INJURED BOYFRIEND.”

Whenever you’re checking on his shoulder, he always distracts you by kissing your lips or neck while you’re trying to be a good s/o and it always ends up in a makeout session or more

Because he’s got so much more free time, he’s usually found in your shared apartment, clinging onto you while you’re studying waiting for you to finish

“Are you ready to dote on me?”

“No, be patient.”

“>:’(”

When the doctor tell him he’s fully recovered, the first thing he does is lift you in his arms and twirl you around

Sugawara Koushi

Precious bby

This mama bear rarely gets injured, he’s usually the one nursing others

You two are like this wonderful duo with magic curing hands

He absolutely loves that you’re pursuing your dreams of being in the medical field and low-key shows you off to everyone he knows

Especially to his parents, they love you almost as much as they love him don't tell him that tho

He’s really careful while playing because he hates being in pain, like more so than the average person if you get what I mean

While blocking though, he ends up injuring his wrists from the sheer strength of the spike and the not so ideal positioning of his arms

He has tears in his eyes while he’s being brought to the infirmary and your heart literally broke as you watched from the sidelines

He was stuck with a wrist splint for a couple of weeks

Like Atsumu he constantly needs your help to do mundane things like open cans and such

Unlike Atsumu though, he’s less whiny and more distraught over the fact that he’s always being doted on

He isn’t used to being the one taken care of

He always tries not to burden you and always tries to do things by himself

“Koushi! What was that crash I heard?”

“Nothing! Don’t mind me, just focus on your work.”

“WHY ARE YOU COOKING!?”

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, DAMNIT—”

He broke two plates that day trying to make your favorite meal

Apparently cooking with a splint is pretty difficult, he takes note of this

He becomes guilty when you do things like cook and clean, he tries to help as best he can but you always tell him to just sit back and relax but he jUSt cAn’T

He doesn’t want you to worry about stuff like that because you need to study!! He feels so helpless sometimes

While you’re cooking dinner, you’ll just turn to the side and do a double take when you see him staring at you with wide, concerned eyes

“What?”

“I want to help :(”

He’s literally the living embodiment of this emoji: 🥺

You let him help with little stuff like stirring and watching the pot while you cut the vegetables and stuff

He immediately feels better after this, he wants to feel at least a little bit helpful

At the end of the day, while you two are in bed, he’ll nudge closer to you and pepper your face with kisses

“What was that for?”

“I just love you so much, thank you.”

Nishinoya Yuu

Sorry but everyone at the ER is on a first-name basis with Nishinoya

LISTEN HE’S SO CHAOTIC AND WILD, HE ALWAYS GETS HIMSELF INTO DUMB SITUATIONS

His grandfather didn’t even bat an eye when the school nurse would call him informing him that Nishinoya managed to break his arm during his math exam don’t ask

When he found out about your studies and your job he was so giddy and kept telling you that it was fate and that you two completed each other

He’s literally the proudest boyfriend that you could ever have, always telling everyone about how smart and talented you are

“Yeah, you may be a rocket scientist but you will never be as smart as my s/o!”

“Yuu, what are you doing—”

He loves having a smart s/o, he’s always being wowed by your vast knowledge

You can always find him silently cheering you in the corner while you’re studying

Basically, he’s your number one fan and supporter

Asides from that, he’s also your number one patient

Whenever he gets hurt, you’re the first one he turns to, he tells you it’s good practice and that it’s helping you improve your skills in an attempt to stop you for scolding him

One time, he sprained his elbow while trying to do some new move he saw on tv

Insert vine: I don’t care that you broke your elbow

Except you do care, a lot in fact

He’s lowkey tearing up when being rushed to the infirmary because it hurts but mostly because he just wants to play

You have to be so strict and stern with him

He’s so energetic and bouncy, he definitely doesn’t respond well to being bound with bandages or slings

If it weren’t for you, he probably would have worsened his injuries, but he’s a huge simp so he listens to everything you say…mostly

Since he can’t use his energy for volleyball and sports, he’ll direct that energy towards giving you attention

He becomes sooo affectionate and clingy, he just wants to shower you with love

He gets restless often, whenever he does he’ll plop down beside you and wrap his good arm around your waist while you’re working as a way to remind himself to stay put and to not jump out the window from boredom

“Kiss my boo-boo?”

“What are you? Five?”

Unlike the others, he’s very very open about how thankful he is to have you taking care of him, he would scream it out the window if you would let him

He reminds you every day how blessed he is to have you, at the most random of times actually

“Can you open this bottle for me?”

“Sure.”

“GOD, WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE YOU?”

“CALM DOWN—”

He’s so in love, please save him

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insane-weasel · 3 years

Text

Febuwhump Day 2: “i can’t take this anymore”

DreamNotFound/DNF

Sum: Stephen King cliché AU—in where kids find true evil, cliché and then it hunts them to adulthood. Not fully formed idea (not my finest work, more just feeling out characters I’ve never written before).

CW: Animal death, human death, Stephen King vibes.

George’s back was to the wall, his heart thudding in his chest. His eyes went to the door. It hadn’t fully latched, but he couldn’t move to close it entirely now. It would give his position away. On the other side of the door he could hear the soft final footsteps of someone ascending the stairs.

The scrape of a knife against wood—an absent noise from the hefty blade in the killer’s hand hitting the bannister.

How’d he get here?

His life flashed before his eyes.

…

Years ago. When George was ten. This started.

“We shouldn’t be here,” Bad muttered. He was hanging back as far as he could, but not too far from Ant, who was holding the flashlight. Sapnap had his own flashlight and was leading the way, and George trailed between.

“Relax. I’ve seen those older guys in here all the time,” Sap reassured. “They probably have something cool stashed in here. Or like a secret lair. Or I don’t know…”

Sap put his hand to the wall of the cave and shined the flashlight down a dark tunnel that was about a foot high and then towards their current path which was narrow and hardly tall enough for all of them to comfortably walk through. If any of the older guys came in here, they must have to crawl.

“I think we made a wrong turn,” George reasoned, glancing behind him at Ant’s calm, but similarly reluctant face. He nodded at that, but Sapnap shook his head.

“Just a little bit more! We’ll turn back if we don’t find anything.”

“What if there’s bats in here? Or I don’t know—wolves?”

“There’s no wolves in the UK!” Sapnap said defiantly.

“There could be a bear in here?” Bad said.

“He’d have to be a skinny bear,” George said, turning sideways to avoid a jutting edge in the stone. The two behind him followed suit and Sapnap stalled up ahead, running the flashlight up the wall of stone. It was a little higher in here, but only by a head.

“Dead end?” Ant questioned.

“No,” Sapnap said and stepped to the side, letting the other three crowd into the closet sized space.

A crack was in the stone up ahead, rocks piled on either side of the crack. A painting of a face and other images were on the sides, nearly faded to extinction. Only when Ant waved the flashlight over them a couple of times, did George make out that they were drawings.

“This must be their lair? Less cool then I…thought,” George said. “I don’t think there’s any Pokemon cards in there.”

“It’s giving me a bad feeling,” Bad said. “Let’s just go. We need to get home earlier this time.”

“Let’s go in,” Sapnap suggested. He had to practically squeeze himself through the crack, sucking his stomach in and shimmying his shoulders until he was through. “It’s bigger on the other side. A lot! It’s like a room!”

Sapnap had moved away from the opening, his flashlight disappearing further into the opening, so George quickly followed, and Ant concerned bent down, tucking his flashlight under his chin to try and squeeze through the crack at the bottom where it was a little wider.

“Guys!” Bad said panicked. “Don’t just—fine, I’m coming. Don’t leave me out here.” George got through with some effort, but straightened and dusted his hands off on his pockets to see Sapnap shining the flashlight up at the paintings and old torches on the wall, that were—well, obviously, out. They looked ancient.

Ant behind him shined the flashlight in the center of the room to the big stone in the middle. He thought it looked like a well of some type, but it was covered.

Bad made it through with some muttered anxieties about their situation before he straightened, standing between George and Ant and hesitantly looking around the place.

“I don’t think this is the college kid’s hideout,” Bad said.

George nodded. “Looks too…old?”

“Lots of old things around England,” Ant commented.

“But what old thing is this?” George questioned, nudging the stone well with his foot.

Sapnap was bored looking at the pictures and turned his attention to the stone well. “Oh, I think it’s like a…what’s the word. A grave but not underground—”

“We’re in a grave?” Bad was alarmed.

“I hope not,” Ant said.

“There better not be a dead body in there or I’m telling my mum you were the one who ruined the clothes lines, not me,” Bad began rattling off.

“Want to try and look inside?” Sapnap suggested, turning to George and Ant, and nudging the stone cover with arm.

“I don’t think we can move that,” George argued.

Ant passed the flashlight to Bad and helped Sapnap. George went to Sapnap’s other side and the three pushed against the stone cover. No luck. It felt like it almost budged, but with a great heave, the children gave up. Sapnap looked at Bad who had his arms crossed across his chest.

“Come on, help us.”

“Piss off,” Bad said.

“Either help us, or go on home,” Sapnap snapped.

“Just so you know. I think we shouldn’t do this,” Bad said, tucking the flashlight under his arm and joining them on one side to push against the stone cover. They managed to move it a few inches this time, and with another good heave push it entirely off the stone well

Ant was the first to recover his wits, and peer over the edge. “Someone shine a light down here.”

“Got it,” Sap had his light pointed over the edge. “Oh.”

“What is it—” Bad shined his flashlight over the edge and winced. “It’s almost worse than a dead body. Darkness. Great.”

“So, it is a well?” George said, looking into the darkness.

“I don’t think there’s water down there.”

“Anyone have anything we can throw down it?”

Ant checked his pockets and pulled out a pencil. “Got this.”

“Toss it in then!”

The boys waited for a moment as Ant dropped it in the middle, and waited to see if they heard something.

“Did you hear it hit the bottom?” Sapnap questioned impatiently.

“Maybe it’s too light to make a noise,” Bad said, and searched his own pockets, balancing the flashlight on the edge. “I think I have a few coins. Gimme a second.”

He ended up nudging the flashlight over the edge and George and Ant scrambled for it, but it was too late. They followed the light down and it landed with a loud clang against more stone. It illuminated at the bottom the dropped pencil as well as what looked like something down there, like a cave.

“Don’t suppose anyone sees a rope or ladder or stairs down there?” George proposed.

“Damn it. My father’s going to kill me. I borrowed these from his toolshed,” Sapnap said, gesturing with the remaining flashlight.

“I don’t think we’re getting that other one back,” George remarked.

“No need to state the obvious,” Ant sniffed. They backed away from the well and glanced around the room, hoping to see something else worth their time. Bad stuck near Sapnap since he had the only light near and Ant leaned against the well, staring at the pictures on the wall. Most were too faded to make sense of.

George glanced back over the edge of the well absently as he circled the room and saw the flashlight below flicker. He reapproached the well and glanced over, just in time to see the flashlight turn off.

“The flashlight went out down there!” George exclaimed.

“We should leave!” Bad immediately said.

“Prolly the batteries knocked loose,” Sapnap said, turning to face George, bringing the flashlight with him to shine over the edge. Ant didn’t even turn around as Sapnap tried using the flashlight to see down below. Even with Sapnap, sticking his hand down in the well, the light didn’t reach the bottom. “Whatever. We’ll go. I’m hungry.”

“You know, this could still make a good story to tell Skeppy. He likes when you tell him of our adventures, Bad,” Ant suggested and Bad shook his head. “Sapnap, can you shine the light on the way we came in so we can all get out.”

“Yeah, Bad you want to go first?”

“Ant can,” Bad volunteered Ant who snorted.

“Scared the boogeymen followed us here and are just waiting for us to leave to finally get us,” George teased, elbowing Bad who elbowed him back harder.

Ant fake screamed before laughing. “I’m out. Come on, Bad.”

Bad jumped, then elbowed George again, as if it had been his idea. “Cut it out. Fine. Fine.”

Sapnap and George exchanged looks, as Sapnap held the flashlight pointed at the edge, waving it a little in slight tease as Bad wormed his way through the gap. George went next, but a noise startled him and Sapnap when he was only one arm through.

Sapnap swept the flashlight over to the source of the noise, startling Bad and Ant who he plunged into darkness doing that.

“Hey!”

“Why?”

Sapnap’s light finally landed on the pencil on the ground near the well. He tensed, almost in disbelief, but then with a sort of cocky assurance, approached the well again, and glanced to George.

George understood the unspoken message. He crossed to stand next to Sapnap as he swept the light down again into the well.

Nothing. Just darkness.

“Guys? Hello? We’re stuck in darkness and I don’t like it,” Bad complained.

“Thought we heard something,” George answered, staring over the edge. He wasn’t really comprehending the darkness, until it suddenly wasn’t darkness. The flashlight had turned on down there, but it was being held by someone. His brain was able to pick out a white face peering up at him, flashlight in hand pointed up at them when Sapnap yelled and startled enough to take a few steps away from the well, leaving George with the ghastly visage of only the illuminated smile below.

“What!”

“Someone’s down there!” Sapnap said.

“Let’s go!” Bad yelled insistent and George agreed, backing away from the well and to the crack in the wall. He grabbed the flashlight from Sapnap when he was halfway through, holding it for Sapnap so he could work his way through. Bad was clutching Ant’s arm, glancing between them and the way they came in desperately. “We need to go!”

“I know!” George said. “Sapnap, you good?”

“I’m good,” Sapnap said, straightening. “I’ll lead us out.”

“Quickly, please,” Bad said, practically shoving Sapnap as he tightly squeezed past Ant and George to take the lead. He was the one who knew the caves best, but it meant George was taking the back as they left, staying as close as he could to Sapnap, but left in near darkness due to their now limited light sources.

As they squeezed through the tight passages they took before, George found his heart getting steadily faster and more nervous, his sweaty hands picking up more dirt than they ought to as they scraped across the walls of the cave as he followed the sound of Bad’s voice and Sapnap’s light.

It felt like something was right behind them. George knew it would do him no good. There was no light behind them. He wouldn’t be able to see.

But he glanced behind them.

And saw nothing.

But it felt. Like there was something behind them.

Eventually, they got out of their tight passageway they took and were back into the parts of the cave they knew better, jogging lightly to get out of their faster until they were in the parts lit by sunlight. They were dirt-covered, sweaty and a little shaken, but after a moment, Sapnap laughed.

“You guys should have seen your faces,” Sapnap said, laughing.

“What?” Bad questioned, indignant.

“It was probably nothing. Just a moth, right George?”

George thought back to the terrible smiling face below. “Yeah.”

…

[Present Day]

But as George knew now. It hadn’t been a moth. He felt his hand shaking as he leaned his head back and held his breath, his ears practically homed in only on the featherlight footsteps right outside the door. The steps passed the door after a moment, but George didn’t take a proper breath in, just breathing ever so slightly through his nose.

After all this time. It was back.

It hunted them. It killed some people then.

It’d do it again.

The first death was someone near the sight last time.

…

[Past]

George woke up in the morning without a thought to the day’s events before. There was no reason to be bothered by them, even as he headed off to school. It remained a forgotten trip until he and his friends had made it home and were about to write off the hasty essays and what not and be off to their own devices.

When George’s mom shook her head as he came in, holding the phone. “Oh, George. Not today. Stay in. There’s been an accident near here. The neighbor’s son. He—He fell terribly ill.”

Terribly ill had been a very nice way to say found disemboweled in his bed, his head missing. A very gory death.

The boys discussed it at school the next day. Only Bad and George seemed to reckon it was connected to the cave. “No child murderers live here! We’d have heard of it before if they had,” Bad reasoned.

“Unless a child murderer just moved here,” Sapnap said.

“I reckon child murderers don’t live places. They just keep moving,” Ant said.

“I feel like there was something in the cave,” George said. “What we saw was probably a moth, but it felt creepy in there.”

“Not you too,” Sapnap muttered, taking a bite of his sandwich. “I think you’re over-blowing it.”

But that had only been the first death. The second one, hit much closer to home. While George’s mom had prevented him from hanging out with the others the other day, his father had no same fears and let him leave after he confirmed he finished his chores and what not.

They were in Ant’s backyard, play fencing with swords when Ant gave a cry. “She hasn’t come back!”

“Who?”

“Mimi.”

“Doesn’t she normally spend all day sunbathing out here,” Bad questioned, ducking Sapnap’s attempted foul move of knocking him upside the head. “She’s too old to go far.”

“But she always comes when it’s dinner time,” Ant muttered. “Mimi,” he called out at the woods, beckoning for his old, arthritis ridden cat.

No cat came.

George had been taking a break and got up, stepping past Sapnap who was doing an impressive job of blocking every hit. “Let’s go look for her,” he suggested to Ant.

They didn’t have to go far.

They saw the figure, yellow, bright and hunched over a carcass with a collar on it. The white mask stained red.

“Mimi!” Ant cried out, and he charged the figure, only being held back by George, as the figure straightened, its white face turning to look at them. “My cat!”

“Ant!”

The figure started towards them and George pulled Ant with him back towards his yard. They stopped only when they hit the backporch. Ant was sniveling quietly to himself, and George’s eyes were peeled on the small woods.

Nothing came out of it. But if he squinted he could see a white mask behind the trees.

Sapnap and Bad lowered their wooden sticks, glancing to the two with obvious concern. “Oh god, did she finally croak?” Sapnap questioned.

“Something killed her! I saw her dead body!”

“And the thing from the cave was hunched over her,” George said.

“What—you said you didn’t see anything?” Bad protested, suddenly suspicious. “This isn’t a prank?”

“No—”

“I didn’t see anything hunched over, Mimi,” Ant said, wiping at his tears. “What are you—”

“The thing holding the flashlight in the cave,” George said turning to Sapnap. “You saw it! It was in those woods hunched over the cat!”

“I only saw the floating flashlight,” Sapnap said. “Nothing—why would only you be able to see it?”

“I don’t know!” George said. He glanced to the woods. “It’s out there. Watching us. I can feel it.”

The boys went silent, eyes turning to the woods. “Where is it at?” Bad whispered.

George focused on the woods, but he couldn’t make out any mask shapes within it. “I’m not sure. I just—I just can.” He made eye contact with the pale white face.

…

[Present]

George inched away from the wall, further into the room. He could grab something. This time, the thing knew what George could do. It knew George could put him back in there. That George alone had the power to vanquish him.

Maybe that’s why this time it went after his friends first. Ant was a cat now, there was no curing that. Bad was…wasn’t human anymore either.

He was the only one that could do anything now. George took a deep breath, feeling his heart lock in his throat. There was no escaping it. However, it had gotten out again. Clearly. It wasn’t permanent. Someone had let it out. One of them had to. It took four of them to put it back. It’d only have taken one of them to let it out.

But they got rid of it. They vanquished it. Or so he thought.

…

[Past]

Four boys, an old history teacher and a now childless mother stood over the stone well, now covered again. There was now chains on top and as a final send off, plain English explaining why this shouldn’t ever be opened again.

“It’s over,” Sapnap said.

“Three weeks of terror,” the gruff history teacher said. He’d been named Oldman or something, he moved away after this. His voice had a grim humor. “Three children killed, two adults. And all we had to do to put it back was practically bait it like a mouse on a trap.”

His eyes turned to George. “You listen here, young man—”

“They’ve had a rough day, let’s just get out of here,” the mother said. She gestured them out, but George felt the history teacher’s eyes on his back.

He wasn’t surprised when the woman’s back was turned, he pulled George aside properly this time, jabbing a finger in his chest. “You’re the one the curse is tied to. You’re the one who first made eye contact with it. It’s marked you. When it comes back, you’ll be the only one able to put it back. You’re the only one who can see it properly. You know properly how horrible it looks.”

“I don’t—I can’t,” George stammered.

“Your friends’ lives depend on it.”

“Stephen Olderman, leave that boy alone—are you daft?” His neighbor and the mother of one of those boys he’d never learned the name of cut in, shuffling him back to the safety of his group of friends.

But they were never the same. Ant was haunted. Bad was always itching at his skin. And Sap shuddered, a small tick came over him. Almost as if maybe George hadn’t saved Sapnap in time. That the thing had taken apart of Sapnap with it when it was sealed. Like it called Sapnap to it.

…

[Present]

Sapnap had to have let it out. He was the only one who had any reason to. He was—possessed to. It couldn’t be helped. He couldn’t blame Sapnap.

But with Ant and Bad taken care of, and Sapnap willing to let it out. Then the only person left that could be a threat was…him. George was alone.

And it floored him. He sunk to the ground, suddenly his mind too blank to think about planning some brilliant escape.

He could hear the room next to the one he was in being searched and he decided he couldn’t run anymore. He was facing the creature. He was the only one who could see it. The thing that called itself Dream.

George stood, crossed the room quickly, his heart beating so hard he felt faint, his vision swimming at the edges. He gripped the brass doorknob and twisted it, throwing it open and getting ready to confront the monster.

It exited the room it had been in, clearly having heard George. It stood a few inches taller than him, with the white mask covering its face. It seemed, put-off, George had just revealed himself. Standing weaponless and unprepared before the monster, George just grit his teeth.

“I can’t take this anymore.”

Dream tilted his head, a question.

“You’re going to keep hunting me down. No matter where I go. I can’t vanquish you. Not with Sapnap…under your control. I give up. Kill me.”

Dream took a step forward, raising the sword, but he didn’t move to kill George, seemingly giving him time to change his mind.

“It’s going to come down to this. We banished you before, but that wasn’t enough. You’d already taken your—taken something—someone—to coerce us into letting you out again. If Sapnap could be…fixed—you’d do it again.”

Dream lowered his head. A nod or small sign of acceptance. Maybe it was nothing.

“We fucked up. We opened your tomb. And now…Ant’s a cat. Bad’s this weird…monster. Sapnap is possessed by something and nearly killed me and you—” George spread his arms wide. “I guess…I’m done running. I’m done.”

Dream took a step forward, pressing the sword to his chest, then lowered it until it was digging into his stomach. He was planning to disembowel him.

“Just one question for you?” George questioned.

The monster looked at him.

“Why me? Why can I see you?”

Dream lowered the sword again, and grabbed George by the collar, dragging him close. He was close enough he could feel his breath hitting Dream’s mask

“I wanted you to see me when I killed you,” Dream said, and ran him through.

#febuwhump #febuwhump day 2 #dnf #fanfic

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flusteredmountainman · 5 years

Text

Bullet-pointed predictions I have for each of the new 3 routes

For like an in-depth prediction I did of Muriel’s one a couple months back see this old thing

So a huge commonality in the first three’s arcs (as I mention in that linked post) is reconnecting with family (both found and blood) and so I first and foremost think that this will be present in each LI’s route; I’ll go into more detail on what I think this will look like for each of them individually, plus upright/reversed end speculation based on the definitions for their patron arcana.

***Spoilers for Muriel, Portia and Lucio’s routes so far and references to Nadia, Asra and Julian’s routes***

I’ll start with Muriel because I’ve already talked to his route the most and I think it’ll be the easiest place to start!

Muriel:

The role of family in his route:

Obviously as we’ve seen so far, Muriel has a lot of unresolved feelings of abandonment, shame, self-loathing and loneliness associated with his family and the fact that they’ve abandoned him.

He’s already had the very beginnings of opening up to MC in his last book (The Hermit - very fitting), and he will perhaps continue to do so

I think a central theme for his story will be reconnecting with his family and hearing their perspective on what happened for two reasons: firstly because of one of the options for MC’s response to this discusses that he actually doesn’t know his parent’s reasoning and that maybe they Did want him, and the second relates to Nadia’s route and her arc with reconnecting with her sisters

In her route, similarly she vents about how annoying and patronising her sisters were throughout her life and you can either agree or posit that maybe they were just trying to help/showing they cared about her (reversed vs upright choice)

I’m also hoping he generally creates a stronger support network - I think at least Portia, Nadia and Asra (and maaayyyybe even Morga but that might be pushing it) will end up helping him and MC in the confrontation with the devil at the end - just based on who we’ve seen interacting with him the most in positive ways so far

Upright meaning: Look inside yourself for the answers you seek. Take time for introspection in the days ahead.

He’ll recover from his trauma, recognise himself as a person who is deserving of love and support and who has Needs (including like. a bed. lol.)

Honestly I don’t have a lot else to say ‘cept that bc I said it already so kjaefjef check my aforementioned post if you want More for my favourite man

Reversed meaning: Be wary of retreating too far within your own mind. Others still have valuable things to share.

He decides that he needs to handle the confrontation with the devil alone - probably erring more on the side of self-sacrifice than anything else and/or seeing his sacrifice as just (still blaming himself for his trauma, he believes that his only way to “Redemption” is by falling on his own sword, so-to-speak)

Portia:

Oof, Portia’s a tricky one so far.

The role of family in her route:

So, obviously she has a lot of baggage with Julian. Some of this is hinted at just around her arcana’s definitions, but I’ll get to that soon.

She’s a compulsive secret-hoarder and collects information about everyone around her. I think this is probably a hang-up that she has around control - or loss of it. She doesn’t have security or wealth or even anyone to permanently look after her/mentor her (Julian left and Lilinka - her adoptive grandmother - passed away leaving her to fend largely for herself).

I think that information is the one thing she feels that she has control over, because so much of her life has been out of her hands (and also just chasing Julian around trying to clean up his messes)

She’s literally a head servant as her job -so much of her life is being told what to do and also telling others what to do. I think she fears loss of control in her life, but she’s also never been in a position where she’s been able to be an active agent and do things just because she wants to do them.

She craves validation, safety, and support and that’s why she found herself in this employment role with Nadia - and even then in Nadia’s route (and her own), she’s terrified that Nadia will abandon her in a heartbeat - even though she literally nursed her for years and has been nothing but loyal. Girl has some Mad abandonment issues

Edit: Portia ultimately blames herself for the people around her leaving and thinks that people will only stay if she can be useful in some way - hence why she so doggedly pursues Julian's innocence because she thinks the only chance she has of him staying is if she can literally fix his mess

Largely I think her arc with her family will be about her feeling emboldened to be honest about her feelings and letting Julian know in a meaningful way how much his absence impacted her, but also realising that she Actually Can lean on Mazelinka (who she obviously loves but has made Many excuses as to why she’s too busy to see her - probably again a thing of “if I control when and where I see you, then I can’t get hurt in this relationship”), Nadia, and probably also Asra and some of the other servants even?

Upright meaning: Believe in your inner light. You may have endured great hardship, but it only makes you shine brighter.

Idk man lol this is honestly quite vague.

I think this will prolly be a similar thing to Muriel - just specifically confronting that Yes, she’s had a hard time of it but she shouldn’t let that impact her quality of life

Also probably a lot of stuff around her realising she’s worthy of love as a person and that the people who love her won’t abandon her

Reversed meaning: Now is not the time to despair. Keep believing and let your star shine bright. The world needs you

Again.... aefkjfkae...... very vague.....

I think she won’t be able to let go of her fear of abandonment generically - or alternatively will perhaps? Try to bargain with the devil? I could see a similar thing happening with her that happened in Nadia’s reversed end - perhaps she believes she can save the world/MC by offering her servitude to the devil and being beholden to him? This is Fully a reach, I honestly have no idea :P

Lastly, Lucio:

Don’t worry, I’m not dunking on him lol. I don’t like him but that doesn’t mean I don’t have Thoughts about his route.

The role of family in his route:

Well. This one is clearly quite literally maybe the messiest out of these three (I mean that literally, in terms of, the amount of blood lol)

Obviously, he has a lot of baggage with both of his parents. I’ll disclaimer and say that I personally don’t see Morga as abusive - that doesn’t mean people can’t - but I’m making speculations specifically about their relationship just based on the in-game context clues we have and nothing else

As a person, Lucio is ultimately obsessed with power and attaining it. He’s clearly insecure and is desperate for any sort of validation, which is made messier by his natural sense of entitlement. This combination means that he chronically chases power, thinking that leadership means being able to do whatever you want to do with no consequences (e.g. in his route and also in Nadia’s when he briefly discusses killing people as count/countess) - and especially he thinks that if he has the power, the wealth, and the status then he’ll get the validation that he desperately craves.

As count, he throws lavish parties and spends a lot of time with the vagabonds in the south end - trying to win petty devotion and admiration with meaningless shows of wealth meanwhile his people are starving and suffering in the flooded district. He just wants to be popular at the end of the day, he doesn’t care about actual leadership or using his power for good, unselfish reasons. He claims his people love him, but it’s hollow, ornamental love based upon flash, not substance

Morga as a parent is harsh - she’s critical and derisive at times, but it’s also clear that she does love her son (specifically how she says she spoiled him by never letting him get hurt). Lucio as a teenager grew up somewhat spoiled and expected that power would fall to him by virtue of heritage from his mother when he came of age.

I think that Lucio didn’t get what he needed from Morga necessarily as a kid, and as a result he craved that first position of power because he saw it as a source of validation he hadn’t previously had - and when it was denied him, he became resentful and even murderous towards his parents.

Woof, long fucking paragraph. I do think that Morga and Lucio will end up reconciling in his route somehow. I think it’s central to his character and to filling the void inside of him that he learns that you can’t buy people’s love - also just because his whole story and entry into the world was sparked by that essential conflict with his mother. I think it would feel weird narratively if that weren’t at least addressed - whether or not it ends in reconciliation

Upright meaning: Shake off his veil: you are not trapped. There is always a way out of even the darkest places.

I think that this will be a redemption arc for Lucio. I think that in order for him to be redeemed he’ll have to relinquish the devil’s influence over him - which will involve addressing the wrong he’s done and apologising/trying to atone for it (whether or not other LIs accept his apology is another thing - as they all have very valid reasons not to)

I think the “way out of the darkness” for Lucio is in giving up his quest for power. He will learn that it’s ok to just be Lucio as a person, that he can be vulnerable and responsible for himself, and that people will love him as he is and not for the way he throws his money around

Reversed meaning: It is time to clean house: purge the things that harm you from your life. Take back your power.

Now this literally includes the sentence “take back your power” so. whoomp there it is. Lucio can’t let go of his power-hunger and becomes even more selfish and self-righteous.

I think also unfortunately this will mean he will literally probably kill some if not all of the other LIs, and also (especially) his mother. He will see anything that challenges his power as opposition to be removed, and he will rule (alongside the devil? who knows) in chaos and blood.

Ookey!! kajefnkae glad I got that out of my system. If I missed anything/if people have their own ideas/thoughts I’d love to hear them! Have this giant essay lol, we’ll see if anything I predicted comes true in the next several dozen updates eh? B)

#muriel #portia devorak #muriel the arcana #lucio #the arcana #the arcana game #lucio the arcana #long post #meta #jaye writes #the arcana spoilers #nadia #julian #asra #mazelinka #morga

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autumnfanfiction · 5 years

Text

The next few weeks Chris and Robyn spent every moment together that everyone in the hospital started taking notice. Their rooms were interchangeable, so it was either his room or hers, but Chris liked going to her so she wouldn’t have to move. He started spending nights there and tried to convince Nurse Sandy to persuade the doctors of moving his bed into Robyn’s room. The doctor overseeing them was hesitant but promised that he would give it some thought.

They didn’t have a title for what their relationship was but actions speak louder than words, and their actions implied they were a couple. They characterized it as more than friends, less than lovers. Oddly enough when Robyn would go see Gran Gran, she would go alone because Chris wasn’t ready to meet her just yet. He planned on making things official between them before that took place and his Mother would fly in from Virginia. By that time everything would be definite.

Their late night dates were frequent, and Robyn loved sneaking out with him just off the fact they haven’t gotten caught. Chris gave her life a thrill and filled it with adventure. It was something new every day that she anticipated the next. She could have never imagined that she would be feeling the happiness she was experiencing at this point in her life. If it wasn’t for her being in the hospital and getting checked ever so often for any new developments, she would have forgotten she had cancer in the first place.

He did that––– made her forget anything that was troubling her. He soothed the rough edges in her life, and thankfully she did the same for him. Life had been cruel to her, but in the midst of her madness, she found peace with him, so that alone outweighed the bad. They say “love conquers all” and she wished that love would conquer what was trying to weaken them. Her faith was getting better though, and it was due to the two people in her life. Whenever she needed reassurance Chris would describe her as a woman clothed with strength and dignity, so she shouldn’t have fear of the future. They prayed together and being Chris’ sole focus for a time was to bring her closer to God than himself, she knew he was the one. She made up her mind a while ago and said to herself she would trust in God and lean not on her own understanding; she would not have a spirit of fear but of love and a sound mind.

She was in her Gran Gran’s room since Chris was sleeping and wanted to get some advice and shake the last few loose ends she had of doubt. “Gran Gran?”

“Yes, Anna?”

“I’m scared.”

“Scared of what?”

“I think it’s obvious the only word to describe our feelings for one another is love, we’ve just haven’t said it, but I still have these what ifs. I mean, is it actually easier for both of us to be together because we have the same illness? I think it’s the opposite. What if he runs off? What if he finds another girl to like?”

“Trust in his loyalty. Mi see him respects yuh so him won’t do anyting like that.”

“Trusting is hard. Knowing who to trust is even harder.”

“Yet yuh trust him, Anna.”

“You’re right.” She said quietly

Dolly looked at her granddaughter thoughtfully. “Mi don’t tink dat is what has yuh scared, Anna,” She paused. “Yuh neva thought yuh would get dis attached, did yuh?”

She shook her head. "No. I think about him so much, and I've tried to stop myself from doing so. He’s amazing Gran, you know?” Robyn paused smiling as a visual of him popped into her mind. “This isn’t surface level I feel it deeply in my bones. I feel I can surrender myself, submit, and allow myself to be exposed to him. I’ve never felt I could do that with any man before. And that scares me Gran Gran how easily I’ve conceded to this, to him. I’m getting attached and that’s not safe. It's not safe getting attached to someone not knowing what the future holds. Feelings change, people change. Nothing is definite, and nothing is promised in life except death."

“If yuh not able ta get him out yuh mind, him prolly ‘posed ta be dere.” Gran Gran Dolly looked at her granddaughter and sighed. “Him not like de otha man, yuh know? Him won’t leave yuh, Anna. Mi know it hurt yuh, but dis ain’t de same ting.”

“I know they aren’t the same.”

“Mi hope so cuz mi would hate ta see yuh push him awey. Luckily, mi know him won’t budge.”

Like regular Robyn, and Chris snuck out for their date unbeknownst to Robyn he had something special planned this evening. He planned on taking her out to a nice restaurant for some good food and entertainment. Then would cap the night off with showing her some new art pieces he’d been working on without her knowledge. He made a great effort into capturing her beauty in some of them, and the simplicity of their relationship with others. He dabbled in different types of styles of art because it fit how dynamic their relationship was. He just hoped she would see it because he sensed a change in her recently.

They were at his art studio in his penthouse where all his past works and new ones were. Robyn felt like she entered another dimension consuming herself with the different artworks he made. She couldn’t believe this artistic soul was her best friend and possibly more. To her, it took a creative genius to be able to create art like his, and that’s exactly what he was to her.

“Come here, I want to see you some things.”

“New art?”

He nodded and smiled at her enthusiasm. He took her hand and led her to the other side that was much more secluded and intimate for the types of paintings he crafted. As soon as they stepped into that spot Robyn let his hand go and wandered on her own looking at the collection before her. There were precisely five canvases, and it was clear he was trying to tell her something. It was a story. A love story. How it was before them, how it became when they met, and what would happen after it was official.

If she doubted them before, she couldn’t possibly now, and she felt her emotions take over. He stood back and watched her go through all of them. He wanted this. For some reason, he wanted it badly, and he wouldn’t force her to but allow her to come to terms this, them was right.

“What’s going through your mind Buttercup?” He asked softly

“What if we never met?”

“But we did.”

“How can you be so sure about this? About us?”

“How can you not be?” He had the answers for her, but she didn’t have the answer for him. At least at the moment. Her constant apprehension was starting to annoy her too, but she couldn’t help but be that way with everything she’s gone through. Her heart and mind were playing tug of war even though her mind knew what was right. She was just so used to doubting when good things came along she never allowed herself to fully enjoy it. Which was the current problem here that was becoming more prevalent despite the strides she made.

“Robyn, you know how I feel about you.”

“I know.” She said quietly

“Do you feel the same?”

“Without a shadow of a doubt.”

“So what are you so afraid of? What about this makes you feel so uneasy?”

“It’s not you. I don’t know I’m just so used to being let down that it’s customary for me to block my blessings. I just don’t want to lose this, to lose you. I allowed myself to enjoy spending so much time with you that for the first time in a long time I was free from worrying. I was out of my own head. But I have a tendency to assume the worst when things have gone great for too long. This is too good to be true.”

Robyn ran a hand down her face, and Chris felt she still had more to say so he remained silent waiting patiently for her to continue. “My last relationship was a joke. I thought I finally found love until he dipped on me when he learned I had cancer. He abandoned me in my time of need, and that’s left a bitter taste in my mouth. I always get abandoned, always have people leave my life after they feel they don’t need me anymore. I didn’t expect to be so open and receptive towards you—– I honestly didn’t want to, I wanted to keep myself sheltered away, and keep my heart cold. That was the safer choice. But you made it so hard. I know you’re not him I’d be a fool to think otherwise, but at some point, it’s possible that you can leave to and the way you’d exit my life would be beyond my control. I’m scared to get attached because to do so then have you taken away from me after being so deep? I’d fall into despair from which I’d never recover.”

Chris walked up to her slowly and wrapped his arms around her. “Robyn as long as you’re breathing I’m not going anywhere.”

“It’s just not fair!” He held onto her tightly but not so much to where he could cause her pain. She was shaking and soon tears started to fall. He made her face him and made sure to kiss all her tears away. She needed to let her tears go because she had been holding this in for so long and maybe now she’d be able to free herself from all the doubt.

“I talked to God about you,” he paused as she met his eyes. He smiled. “I actually talk about you to him regularly in the mornings. I feel like it’s the best time to do so because in my eyes love comes alive at night, but love is more seasoned and tender during the day.” He brushed a piece of her curls from her face and kissed her forehead, and she melted into his arms. “Anyway, I asked him why he would bring you to me now. Why he would bring me happiness if it would only be temporary. I didn’t think I’d get an answer, but I got one. You want to know what he told me?”

Robyn nodded and sniffled. “He told me he brought you to me because that was his will. We were supposed to meet each other under these circumstances so we could uplift each other. In that process, we become closer and find love also binding us closer to him. He said I need to fret not because our love will stand the test of time and would certainly not be temporary. Baby Girl, I have doubts too. It’s okay to have doubts as long as we recognize what’s true in the end.”

“What if the end is near?”

“Is that your heart or your mind talking?”

Robyn bit her lip and put her head down. Chris put his finger under her chin and brought it up slowly. “Tell me, Baby Girl, when did you last let your heart decide? And why are you fighting it?”

“Meeting you has made me wonder why I thought I’d be better off alone.”

He stroked her cheek. “So you gonna stop running from me and be my girlfriend?”

“I’d be honored to be your girlfriend.”

He spun her around a few times, before setting her on her feet but they never backed out of their embrace. Chris looked at her eyes then her lips. He leaned in and kissed her, and Robyn felt her head spinning. The kiss was slow, and they both were savoring every second that passed by. His tongue was between her lips, and she let him in happily. Neither of them had ever felt like this before, and the fact it was them made it that much sweeter. His tongue penetrated hers, her sweet scent, and the heat emanating from his body made their kiss loaded with passion.

They finally pulled away both of them cheesing. Chris winked, and Robyn giggled. “That was nice.”

“If you thought that was something wait until I really put my tongue to work on your inner workings,” Chris flicked his tongue at her and she laughed lightly slapping his chest. “And I’ll work them out in more ways than one.”

“You tryna raw me?”

“I wanna go raw in your heart.”

Robyn gasped. She wasn’t expecting that response, but his tone of voice stirred emotions inside of her and definitely changed the mood.

Chris lightly pressed himself against her. He pressed his lips against her ear and let out a breath, which caused Robyn’s skin to heat up. He smirked before saying what was currently on his mind. His body was on autopilot acting out every line that formed in his head. His voice was far removed from his normal soft tone but more seductive. He made sure he rubbed up against her at certain parts indicating he was willing to surrender his heart and himself to her.

Raw; no protection sliding my way in

breaking down your walls

giving you every inch...

I crave to be deep in your guts and as much as I love being inside nothing brings me a stronger climax than being deep in your thoughts

Deep in your heart

stroking your soul

stroking... until your heart and mind are on the same accord

Raw; eye contact as I strip you down wanting to see your naked truths

plucking you... until all I feel is softness

I know gold lives inside of you

I push back, you react there’s something sexy about the way you unfurl before me

I put the head in...

hoping your head is no longer a barrier of your heart I want to coat it

Penetrate deep overflowing you with love until it drips into your soul

backstrokes and breaststrokes as it creeps into your mind that you’ve let your guard go

Raw, can I raw you? May I? Slide my way in with no protection and give you every inch?

But more importantly…

The question is, can you take it?

#chrianna #chrianna ff #chrianna fanfic #chrianna fanfiction #chris brown #rihanna #chris brown fanfic #rihanna fanfic

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allofthisnonsenseplease · 6 years

Text

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 superheroes??

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 Yus. -'u'- Who's got what sorts of powers? Do we wanna make Jack your standard super strength, super speed, flight, lego hair type? or something more tailored to his personality? also, if option A, should he have a secret power as well which he doesn't like using for some reason? and for Gabe, Reaper-esque powers? Or flip it to something that still reference that, but goes in a different direction?

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 LEGO HAIR LMAO

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 or maybe even have him be more like Batman? Where he's got skills and gadgets, but isn't super human or enhanced? SUperman has fucking lego hair.

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 ooo i like the batman-esque thing for gabe !!

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 you could pop it right off his head.

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 LOL jack is just edgy captain america

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 oh, yeah, him too. like a lego man. i feel like it clicks into place too neat.

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 XDDDDDD i want him to secretly be a mutant or something and yeah like you said earlier has some secret ability bc of it that he doesn't use

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 honest to god, my first thought as i'm sitting here considering what Jack's secret power ought to be was 'can give opponents instant boners' SO. setting that aside XD

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 AHAHAHAHAHA

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 next thought was that he has some sort of mind control thing he can do--like, he can make an opponent so enamored of him that they'll follow any order he gives. but i kinda want his power to be integrated with the other things he can do

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 ooooo i actually like the mind control thing... like he's really uncomfortable w leadership bc he doesn't like making people do things

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 yupyup

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 which informs his whole loner schtick refuses to join any superhero organization

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 and he hates using it bc of ethical reasons, but he WILL if lives are at stake

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 yeah QoQ but he always feels gross after

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 yup. and he tries so hard to avoid it so that he doesn't start to depend on it. plus, part of the reason he feels gross is bc it does give him sort of a power rush, and there is a slight temptation to use it to nudge events in his favor when he's just out, like, barhopping or whatever.

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 yepppppp especially to get people in bed w him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 exactly but that is All Sorts of Wrong and he knows it so he doesn't ever ever do it, and he hates himself for even thinking that it's a possibility. which, to be fair, it technically is. just a repugnant one. anyways, is this sort of a tiger & bunny thing where there's lots of heroes, and they have like, one special quirk, but sometimes someone with the proper tech can go be a hero too? and everybody just kinda thinks that Jack is one of the latter?

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 yeah!! definitely and gabe actually is a batmany type

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 Angela developed the nanite swarm, and Gabe uses it for his hero stuff, and he's got, like, ninja/magician/illusionist tricks to make it seem like he's actually vanishing in a cloud of nanites & other junk. He's the opposite of Jack--a normal dude masquerading as a superpowered super hero

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 gabe of course designs all the aesthetics himself LOL

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 ABSOLUTELY theater kid with a minor in special effects

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 so gabe thinks jack is a lame version of him being a self made super

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 lol that's mean Gabe. He's trying. A for effort, Jack. are they rival heroes then? also, does Gabe work as a lone wolf to help disguise his lack of powers?

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 yeah! so whenever they both end up at the same crime scene they get snippy w each other gabe's flashy dramatics grate on jack's nerves

SuspiciousPopsicle - 10/31/2017 XD jack firing off a round of something non-lethal into the disappating swarm of nanites after one of their fiercer arguments

firesonic152 - 10/31/2017 LOL gabe gets pissed bc it makes a rip in his cloak so is gabe like... mad rich and jack is more spiderman-y, way less resources but kinda smart enough to make it work

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 wealthy gabe. w a big mansion. lots of varied, classy, beautifully arranged places for the two of them to fuck. XD

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 >:3c they're both like. so angrily attracted to each other lol it's one of those gabe is determined to figure out jack's secret identity jack would rather not know anything about gabe. he doesn't want to get invested.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 oh. =( jack's just there for the sex and violence? lol

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 yepp ooo we need to get into origin stories is gabe just... batman all the way dead parents when he was eight and shit except he likes guns

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 lol mmm... well, where does his money come from? inheritance? earned through his own efforts? lottery?

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 shady mafia parents?

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD that might be good, tho--using the mone they made in the illegal trade that eventually got them killed to combat crime paying the community back in his own way

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 yep !! what's jack's origin story something to do w mutant discrimination

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 he was spat out of a cornfield fully grown and hitchhiked to the big city

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LMAOO or we could have him figure out his powers in some traumatic way as a child

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 what if his parents tried to send him to a camp to pray the abnormality away when his powers first presented and there was abuse and what not going on, so even after he went home, his relationship with his parents was strained. he didn't stay long, and they didn't look too hard for him when he ran away. He was fourteen or fifteen, and looked a little bit older than he was, but he was in over his head and had to use his power a few times just to get a meal or sometimes a job so that he wouldn't starve to death. he made his way slowly across the country, hitchhiking, mostly. anyone that wanted something more from him than he was comfortable giving as payment for the lift suddenly decided that what they really wanted was to pull over and let this wonderful boy out. Disgusted with himself, wondering if sucking cock wasn't actually a more honest way to get as far from where he'd been born as possible, Jack kept going out of sheer determination. Prolly did a few minor acts of heroism along the way, which gave him a taste for it.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 AW GEEZ QOQ THAT'S UPSETTING AOJCNAECJN i love it lmao he wants to save people to redeem himself!! he never quite recovered from the feeling of self-disgust he got from his parents

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 ta-dah lol

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 lmao jack can tell from all of gabe's fancy gadgets and shit that he's rich as hell and is like super resentful assumes gabe's had a mad easy life and is just doing this for the thrill of it gabe meanwhile can tell jack is pretty angry and reclusive and is curious they always have fun banter in which gabe is overdramatic and jack is overly snarky

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 oooh, a mystery. let's poke it! :D

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 yep! jack accidentally slips up in his snark one day and comments on gabe's sexy ass like "what tf kind of money did you spend on those stupid pants that they cling to your ass like they're painted on" or something and gabe is like lmao you been looking? ;3

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 omg jack

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 jack's been spending a lot of time examining gabe's crotch lately wondering about that D

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 jaaaaaaaaaaaack

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 he's very curious about all gabe's gadgets and their alternate uses

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 jack pls you're supposed to be fighting crime

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 jack gets himself into trouble and gabe saves his ass. gabe insists afterward that jack have some kind of homing beacon in case he ever gets in trouble

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 well, that's sweet of him. Gabe, you big softie. Saying that since Jack doesn't have any powers, it's only right Gabe look after him a bit. He doesn't understand the flash of bitterness on Jack's face, and mistakes it for envy.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 oh geez gabe you are pressing buttons you didn't even realize were there jack hates how much he wants to fuck gabe despite him being annoying as hell

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 lol they're both caught. XD stubborn fucks.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 gabe keeps wanting to like mother jack and jack hates it lmao does jack like have a job irl to make money he's gotta

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 yeah. i think he'd need one lol what if he ends up as Gabe's chauffer or something?

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LOL YES he gets fired from his previous job of something classically superhero like working for a newspaper and he somehow stumbles into becoming gabe's driver it definitely helps that gabe is wildly attracted to him for some unknown reason

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD oh, hey--what if something bad goes down while he's out driving with Gabe one day, and Gabe is all about rushing in to help save the day and Jack, not realizing who his boss is and being afraid that he's going to get himself killed, uses his power to make Gabe drive to safety while he stays to deal w the bad guys

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 AHHH and gabe doesn't know who jack is either once he gets to safety he's like WHAT THE FUCK I JUST LEFT MY DRIVER IN DANGER he quickly gets into costume but by the time he gets there, jack is gone that soldier 76 guy is standing over all the bad guys who are completely beaten to hell

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Gabe is as serious as Jack's ever seen him when he comes dashing up demanding to know what happened to...Jack. XD

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LOL jack is like what the fuck why does reaper care about. real me.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 oh shit! XD i forgot he was all reaper-y! X''''D fuck, dude, i think i need to turn in. i am Not With It tonight.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 awwwww

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 oh SHIT. yah. it's after 1. i DEFINITELY need to turn in.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 hugs

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 ^^;;;;;;;;;;;;; hugshugs will ttyl <3<3<3

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 sleep well!!!

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 you too. =) night night

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 so reaper shows up to the crime thing but 76 has already taken care of it. reaper anxiously asks after the collateral damage and 76 gruffly assures him there were no innocent victims

reaper doesn't bother sticking around for banter, he's worried about his (handsome) driver. he rushes back home and changes back into gabriel and calls jack up

jack has to dash into a random alleyway and take off his mask to answer his cell phone XD

gabriel is all worried and asking if jack's hurt, says it's okay if he doesn't want to come into work tomorrow, apologizes for just driving off he's not sure what came over him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 omg and Gabe feels soooooooooo bad about it, honestly, and every word of apology is another stab of guilt for Jack

!! Gabe taking just a little advantage of the situation to use it as an excuse to offer to treat Jack to lunch. Jack starts to decline (bc of course he feels he shouldn't benefit in any way from what he did) but Gabe insists

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 ahhhhhh gabe treats him and jack is once again a little annoyed at gabe's sheer wealth. internally grumbles about these damn rich people

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 KISS KISS FALL IN LOVE

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LOL YEP ahh they start talking and it's a little too east to banter jack has to keep reminding himself that gabe is his employer

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 meanwhile, Gabe sees him forgetting that and isn't about to throw out any reminders XD

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 hahahaha god gabe wants to sleep w him so bad LOL gabe has a crush on jack and jack has a crush on reaper

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD this feels like that ladybug show

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 YEP gabe tries to apologize again for leaving jack in danger and jack snaps at him to stop with that ahh accidentally "ordering" gabe to stop doing that. and gabe does.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 oooh. so, what if there's, like, a time limit to his powers? 24 hours or so? during which, the infatuation reamins high and people will still do what he says. that way, Jack can accidentally order him to stop (and get a LOVELY little reminder that he's still in charge of gabe) without him being unable to control that power he hates so much.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 AHH jack gets all freaked out and mumbles that he has to go

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 bc obvs, the "date" was only due to his powers

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 oh jaaack he hurries home and kicks a chair over

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 ;; Gabe gives it a couple days to let him have some space, and when things aren't unbearably awkward (somehow???) on the job and Jack doesn't quit, he asks him out to dinner. And Jack kinda shor circuits for a minute as he tries to remember if he mindfucked Gabe again and forgot about it.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 QoQ jack can't deny though. he has a thing for reaper and... gabe kinda reminds him of that....

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 lol jack. listen to that intuition of yours.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 XDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Jack being a bit nervous when he shows up for this date, trying to get past it by making a joke & asking if this is just for fun, or if he ought to look for another job. Gabe actually looks distressed over the idea.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 AWWW gabe gets kinda flustered and says no, no he really... wants to get to know jack better jack bluntly asks if he's looking to sleep together

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Gabe chokes on the sip he was taking.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LOL THE ANSWER IS YES but instead he kinda splutters what?? jack shrugs and looks at him through his eyelashes

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Gabe tries to be both cautious--bc Jack IS his employee--and suave, and fails at both.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 awwww just kinda blurts out that jack is unfairly attractive and he'd really like to... know him better jack smirks which is REALLY UNFAIR and says "in the biblical sense, i assume"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD WHO IS IN CHARGE HERE??

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 XDDDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Gabe feels his control of the situation slipping away. he had planned this, had meant to charm Jack and put him at ease and invite him home after dinner for drinks and maybe something more, but Jack went and threw off his game and now he can't seem to catch up.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 awwww w gabe ahhhh but then something superhero related happens

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Jack internally cursing up a blue streak, Gabe seriously annoyed but also thankful in a way that he'll have a chance to try again on solid footing

lol what if one found out who the other was bc they got food poisoning which set in during the superheroing, and left them kinda fucked up the next day? what a lame way to expose your secret identity

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 XDDDDD i feel like i want gabe to be found out first bc he literally has a superhero lair.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 lol Reaper doubling over and raising a hand to his face, being so freaked out by the thought that if he doesn't get away fast enough he's going ot puke in his mask. XD and 76 offers to help out of actual concern and is waved off as Reaper lets slip it was probably something he ate. Then the next day, Jack hears from Gabe that some food poisoning fucked him up.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LMAO jack puts together... rich... food poisoning... similar banter... the whole aesthetic... HOLY SHIT when he comes in to work he starts snooping and finds the lair

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 he'd be pissed if he wasn't really turned on his hot (potential) boyfriend is his arrogant rival

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 >:3c he's pretty psyched that the guy he wants to bone turns out to be the guy who wants to bone him soo why does he keep his own identity secret at this point bc he gotta

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 lol question! does Jack fine enough on his snooping to realize that Gabe doesn't actually have any powers?

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 oooooo yeah like finds all the gadgets and stuff

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 lol what if the nanites are semi intelligent, and he activates the swarm and they recognize him and sort of go into a harmless standby mode...and suddenly he's being followed around by Reaperbeans.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 YESS they cling to his ankles and chirp adorably

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 he's not a registered user, so he can't give hem any commands, but they spend so long patched into Gabe that his interest in Jack imprinted on them XD

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 XDDDDD gabe realizes someone's broken into his lair and runs in w a pistol at the ready but finds jack surrounded by beans

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Jack, with a cheeky wave: Hey, boss. Can I get a raise?

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LOL

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Jack now thinks he has a perfect excuse to get away from Gabe when stuff goes down--bc of course Gabe is gonna want Jack to go someplace safe--and Jack figures he can just drive a little ways away and put on his hero costume. That plan is thwarted the first time such a situation comes up. Gabe actually comes around to the driver's side door & when Jack rolls down the window, Gabe grabs him by the tie and pulls him in for a kiss, then winks and makes some crack about keep ing the meter running and they'll pick up when he gets back.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 AHHHHH AHHHHHHHHH jack kinda gapes as gabe goes off to fight evil fuck. how bad of an idea is it to fight bad guys with a boner.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 .... not that it would be the first time lbr

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 he's SO FRUSTRATED bc he can't think straight enough to plan a good excuse for what to say if Gabe makes it back to the car before him, so he's STUCK

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 skcjnseckjn he decides it's..... probably fine if 76 doesn't show up this One Time....... gabe can take care of himself for one fight right? omg jack looking around at the tinted windows, then shamefully sinking lower in his seat and thinking about that kiss as he palms at his groin

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD sorry out of context, that seems slightly not the right reaction

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 XDDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 but i'd been thinking along the same lines--Jack getting himself even more worked up, so that when gabe comes back, he can't even comfortably drive elsewhere until they deal with his situation

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 YAY they clamber into the backseat and jack is for once REALLY glad gabe is rich bc the windows are impossible to see through from the outside

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Jack telling Gabe between breathless kisses 'don't you ever fucking leave me like that again' and Gabe is touched, 'cause awww, jack was concerned for his safety! <3 but really Jack just doesn't wanna miss out on the ass-kicking sort of action, either. XD

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 XDDDDDD he gives gabe a frequently interrupted lecture on making an exit like that and how it's NOT FAIR don't DO that JESUS and gabe is just kinda laughing and murmuring "well if it's gonna get this kinda reaction...." omg jack has to wear a driver's uniform right like a nice dark suit

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 PLEASE

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 ahhhhhh gabe gets it all messy and disheveled

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 with the cap

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 YES

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 and white gloves or is it black gloves? prolly black driving gloves.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 kajncsskjnc gabe gets him the absolute minimum undressed won't even let him take off the gloves jack is like YOU MADE ME WEAR THIS SHIT ON PURPOSE DIDN'T YOU. YOU LECHEROUS FUCK.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 THE GLOVES STAY lol for some reason, i really like the aesthetic of built dudes in tight black tees and gloves.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 me tooooo so does gabe apparently

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 he's got good taste in certain things, at least

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 XDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 pfft. Gabe makes Jack a custom uniform for the job. Something like this, but with nothing until about the third button. XD It's just a frame for his tits.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 AHAHAHA YES jack is like ARE YOU KIDDING ME I CAN'T BE SEEN LIKE THIS and gabe is like you. you already put it on without me even asking

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD Jack's like, well, yeah, now follow me to that stupid cliche room you have with the fireplace and the bearskin rug

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 LOL gabe commenting casually one day that it's been awhile since he saw his rival 76

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Jack freezes up briefly but obviously and hopes Gabe didn't notice.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 ahaha gabe thinks it's jealousy or something >:3c hip checks jack and teases him about it

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 ooh...what if Jack, like, starts jokingly trash-talking 76 to kind of sound out Gabe's opinion of him? maybe even suggests that he's hiding a super power?

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 oooooooo

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Gabe's wondering where that idea came from, and Jack tries to shrug it off with something like 'well, you hear stuff' and he suggests that, if that was the case, it would have to be something pretty bad for him to hide it. He isn't prepared for Gabe to defend 76 and argue that even if he does have a superpower, maybe he just doesn't know how to utilize it for crime fighting.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 awwwwwww gabe's jokes that maybe it's something like the ability to make really yummy food or know how the plot of anything is going to end

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 XD Jack kinda basks in it and laughs along as Gabe makes up more and more ridiculous things bc he likes seeing Jack smile. Really, though, Jack is just enjoying these harmless hypotheticals. He's extra affectionate when they have sex later, kissing all along Gabe's jaw and neck, down his arms to his wrists where he turns Gabe's hand to kiss the inside of his wrist and the hollow of his palm. He goes slower than normal, enough that Gabe notices, and reaches out to cup Jack's face and ask him, with a hesitant smile and eyes that show he's trying not to think that something might be wrong, if Jack's okay. And Jack smiles for him, lips stretching wide and tight, eyes crinkling up and it's so strange how that expression almost makes him look like he's about to cry. But he just catches Gabe's hand and pulls it to his mouth for another soft kiss and murmurs into his palm that he's fine, everything is good.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 QOQ AHHHHHHH I'M EMOTIONAL

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 <3

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 gabe keeps asking jack to move in with him but jack can't have that bc when he goes home is the only time he has to be 76 also he wouldn't be able to bring all his hero stuff with him to gabe's house and still expect to keep it secret

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 he can see that it hurts Gabe a bit every time he refuses, but he isn't ready to explain. the best he can do is just claim that he needs his space (Gabe's counter to that is that Jack can have a whole floor to himself if he wants), or joke weakly that at least this should prove he isn't after Gabe's money.

one night, as they're curled up and Gabe is dozing off, arms around Jack and lips against the top of his head, Jack asks quietly: '...what would you do if I had a superpower?'

Gabe stirrs and hugs him a bit tighter. 'somethin' you need t tell me, Jackie?'

He's so close to saying it. In that moment, with Gabe's warm arms holding him close, he feels safe. But the old fear comes back, and the knowledge that he's been lying by omission, and suddenly, this place he's found for himself seems terrifyingly fragile. 'Just a hypothetical,' he lies, pressing his face against Gabe's chest.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 JAKXNASKJCNASC AHHHHHHH okay now what we need is reaper and 76 fighting a bad guy together and reaper is in danger and soldier has no choice but to use his power

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 He tries to make it as subtle as possible, substituting 'put down your weapon' or 'surrender' with taunts. something like 'looking for a challenge? come get me.' and then running off so that he can manage where Reaper won't see.

but it's still a REALLY strange thing for the bad guy to do, and gabe didn't miss the change in his demeanor.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 dcjkasncbk gabe goes after him but 76 snaps at him to stay back and gabe finds himself just... doing it

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 he would do anything for 76. and once 76 is gone, and Gabe has a moment for his head to clear a bit, he realizes that he felt that way once before...with Jack.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 KJSNCESCNJKAEKCHK

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 oh lord. what if, once Gabe knows about Jack's power, he starts to question how much of his feelings are real or if Jack's power caused him to feel that way.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 NOOOO first he sets out on investigating if jack is 76

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 if he looks into Jack's past, one of the last things he'll find before Jack appeared in the city is gonna be the camp.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 qoq

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 maybe Jack was among the last before it was shut down surrounded by scandal. there's a newspaper article where a parent of one of the kids who requested to remain anonymous claims that their child could control people's minds. they ask what they were supposed to do? how could anyone raise a child like that? Once Gabe's ready to confront Jack, he's also angry enough about being manipulated to lead with that. He tosses a copy of that article down in front of Jack with the anonymous quote highlighted, and just says: 'that's you, isn't it?'

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 OH GOD GABE THAT'S JUST GONNA TRIGGER JACK TO HELL AND BACK

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 okay. Jack TOOK CONTROL OF GABE'S MIND TWICE. Gabe isn't being particularly sensitive to Jack's feelings here, but I think he does have cause to be upset. XD

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 true XD but this will not be a fun time for jack's mental health he just kinda freezes and suddenly all the horrible memories from his childhood come rushing back

his face goes white and he nods distantly, staring at the picture of the camp in the newspaper

gabe doesn't know what to do at first. he'd expected jack to put up a fight. he'd thought he'd have to argue.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 Jack shakily trying to speak in a voice that comes out as a whisper, insisting that he didn't use it, that he didn't use it unless he had no choice. He claps a hand over his mouth at one point, looking like he's about to be sick. Gabe is Concerned.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 barely containing his anger, gabe asks jack why he never told him. jack shakes his head and retreats in on himself

gabe tries a different tactic. "you're... soldier 76, right?"

jack just keeps mumbling that he never used it, not unless he had to, he didn't mean to...

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 and at this point, Gabe is getting a bit scared, bc he's never seen Jack like this before.

He kneels and looks up into Jack's face, but whatever Jack's seeing, it isn't there in the room with him. Gabe's anger is shredded away as he thinks guiltily about the glossed-over mentions of abuse in the article about the camp. He hadn't looked any further into that, and he's starting to think that he compounded that initial mistake.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 hhhhhhhh gabe moves to touch jack's face but jack slaps his hand away violently. he looks small and scared.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 jeezus, what if they used to gag Jack so that he couldn't speak and use his power?

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 oh god DDD: what if his voice is all rough bc most of his childhood was spent silent

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 hey, that means we can knock a kink off his list for this one! :D

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 qoq yeah gabe keeps trying to get him to say something but jack's mouth can't seem to form words

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 first job is now to talk him down. after that will be time to rip him a new one. and possibly break up with him.

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 except as soon as jack snaps out of it, he beats gabe to it and shakily tells him he's leaving.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 gabe, you've lost the upper hand once again. Gabe tells him oh no the fuck he isn't, he's going to stay there and explain himself and Gabe is gonna let him have it. Gabe actually physically gets between Jack and the door, and Jack is visibly shaking. Desperate, he tells Gabe that he can make him move, but Gabe calls his bluff. 'Do it, then. I'll call you to account for that, too.'

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 "you wanna break up, right?" jack says, trying to sound angry and intimidating but failing miserably. "then we're done. let me out. i'll never bother you again."

sure, that might end up being the end game for them, but gabe doesn't like how jack is rushing to get there

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 'I don't know yet if that's what I want. You fucked up, Jack. No getting around it. And don't think I'm not fucking pissed at you over it. But I'm still willing to hear your side before throwing you out.'

'I can save you the trouble.'

firesonic152 - 11/01/2017 qOq

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/01/2017 'If you're so dead set on leaving, then why am I still standing in your way?'

He watches Jack crumple, and has to keep a rein on his pity. Just because Jack isn't taking advantage right now doesn't mean he was right to in the past.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 'Why, Jack?' He's a bit surprised that the question is the first thing that comes out, but Jack answers.

'He was going to kill you.'

'But once the immediate danger was past, you stopped me.'

He shrugs, looking like a man condemned. 'Once I'm using it, it's hard to focus the effects. It only lasts a day, and it begins to wear off when I'm not around.'

He isn't making excuses, and Gabe presses. 'What about the first time?'

'I didn't know you were Reaper. I didn't want you to get hurt.'

'Have there been any other times you've done it to me?'

'No. I swear.'

ughhh. i think i need to turn in.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 QoQ I'M SO UPSET

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 it could prolly be worse. we can re-work this bit to make it worse tomorrow, if you want.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 oh god. thanks XDDD this one is your fault btw

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 how tf is this MY fault???

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 you made it angsty lmao

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 i did no such thing. my thought for big plot point was to have one of the directors of the camp show up in town w more research and tech and a program promising to remove superpowers--sort of like a reverse SEP. and Jack recognizes the dude immediately and gets super aggressive and angry about him.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 LOL well we can still do that

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 lol tomorrow. also, don't let me forget about Jack being tempted to use the serum or whatevs on himself

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 OH GOD hugs go to bed XD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 hugs night night =u= <3

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 jack takes an offensive stance and says, "gabriel. i'm not going to order you. but i'm leaving and if that means i have to fight you, i will."

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! What if Jack, like, for serious leaves? Leaves Gabe's house, leaves the whole city. Goes on the move doing his 76 thing. Gabe had let him go thinking they could both take some time, then talk things out and figure out what it meant for them, but Jack just completely disappears on him.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 omg QoQ he tries to visit Jack's house only to find someone else moved in there. Jack won't pick up the phone. He next hears about 76 being sighted across the country

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 Now the quandary is: use ridiculous wealth to chase down exboyfriend who can mind control him (but who Gabe really misses) or not?

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 Isn't that always the question XDD At first he's kinda pissed at Jack for just up and bolting but the more he lets it stew, the more he gets worried and lonely can Gabe get kidnapped or something and Jack comes back for him ??

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 lol one the local chapters of the gang 76 has been tormenting is all: 'hey, remember when Reaper & 76 used to hang around a lot? Let's grab Reaper & use him as bait.'

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 LOL ahh what if there's a group that like figured out 76's ability and wants to use it for themselves coughs// talon doomfist is v smart after all

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 lol

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 doomfist like straight up overpowers reaper and holds him hostage

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 jack's gonna be soooooooooo pissed

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 yeppp

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 he tried SO HARD

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 and doomfist like takes measures to make sure 76 can't use his power against them like special noise canceling ear plugs and pre-recorded messages and shit so yeah jack shows up kinda vaguely aware that this is 100% a trap but not really caring he puts up a fight and takes out all the grunts without too much trouble but doomfist is another story lmao and doomfist was kind enough to allow gabe to watch this entire thing. gabe is Dying.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 of embarrasment for having been turned into the bait? did one of hte grunts hang a sign around his neck that read bait?

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 LMAO he's like beaten tf up and his pride is in shambles and now jack's fucking taking the bait like an idiot doomfist beats jack up and keeps taunting jack about how he's wasting his powers

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 .......... what if jack like after the blow up with gabe he can't get rid of his powers but someone could get rid of him

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 QOQ he just wants to make sure that gabe can get out and then...

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 so he just lets Doomfist do what he's doing and kick the crap out of him. lol what if one of the Reaperbeans followed him? And Jack figures it can get Gabe out while he creates a diversion (read: gets himself beaten to death)

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 qOq gabe hates seeing jack get the shit kicked out of him but he manages to escape with the help of the reap bean and figures now they can get out together but. jack doesn't follow.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 in true dramatic fashion, is there a bomb somewhere, or are we skipping that cliche? XD

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 LOL like just as he gets out there's an explosion and he thinks jack is dead kind of cliche??

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 maybe even Jack brings the bomb and he's gonna take out Talon's leader (& himself, no biggie)

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 jkdnskcnxmvs HOW DOES JACK SURVIVE

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 the reaperbeans flock to his stupid ass. Gabe has to dig him out of the rubble and get him home.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 skajdnakf jack is all fucked up and unconscious. gabe drags him home and jack is PISSED when he wakes up ((pissed at the fact that he did wake up mostly))

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 gabe greets him with a "WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING." jack just glares at him and rolls over, unwilling to say anything to him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 'It's what you thought, too, isn't it?' Jack grumbles. 'That a power like mine shouldn't exist? Couldn't agree more.' He curls tighter into a ball, unwelcoming of anger or concern.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 gabe finally realizes that nobody could hate jack's power more than jack himself ? |D

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 AND KNOWING IS HALF THE BATTLE

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 it suddenly hits him that jack set the bomb he thought it was talon even though it didn't really make much sense

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 Gabe feels like someone just knocked the wind out of him. 'Jesus, Jack,' he breathes. He wants so badly to reach out, but this is they first time they've been together since Jack picked up and left town. He isn't sure what's allowed. Hesitantly, expecting Jack to lash out or bolt, he runs his fingers lightly down Jack's arm. When he gets no mor response than a shiver, he sets his palm against Jack's shoulder and strokes soothingly up and down.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 qoq

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 knee jerk reaction was to finally have Jack break down into tears & Gabe climbs into bed behind him to hold him thorugh it. but. dunno if that really fits

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 i want him to accidentally tell gabe to back off with his Command Voice and then collapses even more in on himself

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 y u do this?

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 like as soon as he says it and gabe moves back, jack's like "NO no fuck no i didn't mean...."

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 if Jack can't control it, then it's going to be an on going problem, though. Like, what's gonna happen when they fuck? Gabe would do him a mischief if he couldn't keep from obeying Jack shouting out deeper-harder-faster

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 hhhhhhhhh now there's a thought * w *

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 oh my god

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 jack just losing it while gabe fucks him and all his pleading driving gabe insane, something thrilling about the fact that he'd obey anyway but he can't refuse asdjsjbvh

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 you are gonna do him a mischief Gabe goes so hard he snaps Jack's spine lol

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 jesussss i feel like half the problem though is that he just denies his powers altogether so he has no idea how to stop them either HE NEEDS TO FACE HIS FEARS AND ALL THAT

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 pls imagine gabe laughing so hard he can't breathe bc jack yells at his avatar in mario cart to go faster as if that will actually work

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 LMAO AHAHAH

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 anyways. Jack can't control his powers. Gabe has seen how much Jack hates his power, and he loves him and is going ot trust that Jack won't turn it against him on purpose, or continue using it once he has--but they DEFINITELY need to have a talk. ((haha remember the one we did where gabe was a useless demon and almost burned down his kitchen trying to make soup for jack and also he had no bowls to put the soup in?))

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 LMAO THAT ONE WAS FUN and yes they need to talk Okay so Jack and gabe need to talk about his powers and they're finally getting somewhere maybe and then the scientist guy shows up w ideas on how to get rid of someone's power

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 AND OFF JACK GOES!

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 He hates the concept but. In his case it really would make his life way easier. so he secretly makes an appointment with the guy

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 AND IT'S ONE OF THE ASSHOLES FROM THE CAMP

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 YEP oh god the guy like recognizes him too and is super polite and nice and being like "ah child I'm so glad we can finally help you" and shit and all those old feelings of wanting to be anyone but himself come bubbling up to the surface for Jack

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 ; ;

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 he keeps it together for the consultation but afterwards he starts thinking about his parents and falls apart a little

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 TT^TT goes out and gets drunk off his ass.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 Hhhh Gabe gets a call from the bar to come pick him up

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 he keeps asking what set thi off, bc usually Jack can at least cut himself off and make it home (they live together now!!), but Jack refuses to say

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 HHHH Jack's primary defense mechanism in this one is to shut up. It's what he's used to.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 you're killin me dude

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 qwq Gabe just wants Jack to talk to him about things. He doesn't know why Jack shuts down and won't say anything He understands Jack's whole self-loathing deal but this particular defense mechanism is such a break from how Jack usually is

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 so how does he get Jack to talk? Or does he hear about the supposed cure and seek out the guy offering it when he realizes that the name was one of the ones he came across while looking into Jack's past?

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 Maybe the guy calls the house to follow up on the consultation and gabe is like WTF

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 oooh. that one. so, are we playing this guy as honestly regretful of the way that camp was handled but still thinking powers are impure and best to be avoided/elliminated? or is he manipulative and a bit evil?

just curious about whether he would tell Gabe a little bit about what happened to Jack when he was younger.

Jack needs fukkin therapy, dude.

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 he does lmao I think this guy is evil/manipulative but genuinely believes he's doing right ya know

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/02/2017 lays it on thick with 'Jack's case was severely mishandled when he was younger, but from our talk earlier, it was obvious that he's in the right mindset. We're here to work with him now, not silence him.'

firesonic152 - 11/02/2017 GABE HAS SO MANY QUESTIONS Like "silence him?" What's with that specific wording...

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/03/2017 ugh that specific wording is proof that i'm no longer ay good with braining today. maybe he assumed that Gabe knew about what happened to Jack and he was trying to convince him that this is what Jack wants. i'mma go ahead and turn in night night <3<3<3

firesonic152 - 11/03/2017 Yeah exactly !! That wording tips Gabe off Ahhhhh good night <33

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/03/2017 :sparkling_heart:

firesonic152 - 11/03/2017 gggghh i was thinking again about jack like being forcibly silent as a kid and like. depending on how early it started he could have had so many developmental delays regarding speech skjfnesfkj

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/03/2017 something to check out when i've got a bit more time later today, sort of find a quick reference about how that might affect someone. in the maentime, him being so rude all the time (and preferring texts) might stem from odd speech patterns--if he's mean, people won't want to talk to him so much, and it just became a habit over the years.

firesonic152 - 11/03/2017 QoQ also just. general lack of good social skills ^^;; sometimes he just pronounces words wrong and tends to overreact to being corrected

SuspiciousPopsicle - 11/03/2017 well, yeah. XD like, it just started out as being defensive over his speech, and got worse with time as being rude got him what he wanted: less expectations that he talk to people. aww...poor isolated Jack. ;;

firesonic152 - 11/03/2017 q-q hhh this is the shit I'm studying I'm excited about this LOL Not this specific kind of case obviously but I am taking a class on language disorders and shit

#cornfuck and the reaper #R76 plot ideas #haven't been able to finish any actual stories to share recently but here is this =)

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i-just-love-writing-crap · 7 years

Text

Catching Murphy, Part 9

Warnings: Swearing, possible nsfw content, partying, underaged drinking Word Count: 8285 (yeesus, y’all really need to stop letting me write this nsfw shit) Summary: You, Miss (y/n) (y/l/n), had a crush on Connor Murphy for years, from a distance of course. You had always been too shy to approach him, and the fact around school that he was an aggressive stoner caused you to become even more shy. One day, in history class, your teacher decided to assign a project and assigned everyone a partner—you and Connor were partnered together. Could you two grow close during the project and remain close? Or will Connor go back to ignoring you after the project comes to a close? A/N: I apologize if Connor is a biiiiit OOC… ;-; Obviously takes place in an AU where Connor is alive. Oh hey look it’s my masterlist, tah-dah Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 10 | Part 11 TAGS: @saturdayschilddrivesmewild @defenestrate-yourself-please @hamilton-canyouimagine @arsonboirich @sunshinesips @philyylester @cozykleinman

PREVIOUSLY:

His sigh gave it away. He was so fucking annoyed with you, but something about you was endearing. Like, he really did grow feelings for you in the two or three days you two had been talking. Taking an entirely different approach to his retort, he surprised you with a serious sounding, “Yes! Okay, fine, we’ll fuck on the hood of my truck! Are you satisfied, (y/n)? I am going to fuck you on the hood of my truck and you will enjoy it like you always do, you fucking slut for me!”

“Oh wow… that was actually kinda hot, Connor,” you said aloud.

“That was the point,” he said, turning his attention to you at a stop sign. He leaned over, grabbed your chin and forcefully kissed you. Not that you minded in the slightest. No, you were actually liking the kisses you had been receiving from Connor the last day and a half. When he pulled away from the kiss, he started driving towards the park.

You and Connor arrived at the park, both having come down from your highs a bit. Connor got out of his truck, and you followed him. “So? Where are we going to lay down and stargaze?” you asked him.

“The fucking grass? Where else?” Connor said, laying on the ground in front of his truck.

Shrugging, you lay on the ground next to him. “Sorry, thought maybe we’d lay in the bed of your truck,” you said.

Connor laughed curtly, “Fuck no. The grass is more comfortable than the fucking cold metal bed of my truck.”

You laughed as well as you answered, “I mean, I can’t disagree with you there, Con. The soft but prickly grass is hella more comfortable.”

“That’s why we lay here and not in the bed of the truck, dumbass,” smirked Connor.

You smiled and casted your eyes up towards the inky black sky, which was littered with points of light. The sounds of nature filled your ears and you grinned widely, sighing happily. “Look at the stars, Con. Hey, look, Orion’s out!” you exclaimed, pointing at the constellation. “He’s my favorite constellation! I wish he was here year round, ya know?”

Connor smirked to himself. Of course you would like the constellation Orion. It was dependable, there in the winter and being a tell-tale sign that the cold season has arrived. “Of course you would like Orion, (y/n),” he said.

“Oh excuse me, Mister Judge-my-favorite-constellation! What’s yours, hmm?” you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest.

Scoffing, Connor answered, “Ursa Major and Scorpio, duh. The coolest badasses in the night sky. Not some dumb giant huntsman.”

You gasped, “Excuse you, Connor Murphy! Orion is a famous constellation and I love the story behind it!”

“Do you even fucking know it?” he asked, sitting up and looking down at you.

Sitting up, you said, “Duh. He was a great huntsman who killed beasts like lions and such as a means to prove himself to someone, probably someone he loved.”

Your words caused the long-haired stoner to laugh heartily. “Oh my fucking GOD! You don’t know the story at all!! That’s not the story, you idiot!” he laughed. He was laughing so hard that he held his sides and rolled on the ground. Connor didn’t know why he found it so funny that you got the story so wrong, but he did. After a few minutes of laughing, Connor recollected himself. “Jesus fucking Christ, I’m sorry but, damn, that was fucking hilarious to me.”

It took Connor a minute to notice that your face had turned bright red in embarrassment and your cheeks were puffed out. “So then what’s the actual story, you fucking prick?!” you said quickly, fully irritated at his laughter. This is why you usually kept quiet in subjects you didn’t know much about, because you were afraid of someone laughing at you and saying you were wrong. As your anger and irritation dwindled, you felt like shrinking away in utter embarrassment.

“There are actually two different versions of Orion’s story. The longer story is that Orion, the giant hunter born somewhere in Boeotia, visits Chios and falls in love with the king’s daughter. Merope was the princess the huntsman fell in love with. However, her father, King Oenopion, refused to let Orion have his daughter’s hand. Even after Orion…” Connor trailed off and thought about what you had said. He sighed and continued, feeling dumb that he had laughed at you for basically being right with at least one of the stories behind Orion, “…cleared the island of wild beasts. When the king still refused to give Orion Merope’s hand in marriage, he tried taking her by force. When Oenopion learned of Orion’s assault, he got the huntsman drunk, blinded him then casted him out of the island. Long story short, Orion was killed by Artemis due to Apollo challenging his archer-goddess sister that she could not hit the black mass wading in the sea. Once he was found dead by Artemis, she placed him in the stars.”

A moment of silence passed between the two of you, as Connor silently waited for you to call him out. But you didn’t, you really didn’t know the mythology behind the constellations and it made him sigh in relief to himself. He continued, “The other, shorter version tells us that Orion was the son of Neptune and the Amazon Queen, Euryale. In this version, it is said that Orion inherited her talent and became the greatest hunter in the world. But, ya know, fuck-tard couldn’t be fucking humble about it, hell no—he had the biggest fucking ego in the world because of his abilities. He boasted about how he could kill any animal on the whole damn planet and, in total irony, a little fucking scorpion stung and killed him. That scorpion was later turned into the constellation Scorpio, and it’s now on the complete opposite side of Orion, so they wouldn’t get into any other tiffs.”

You sighed and looked at Connor, deadpanned eyes as you said, “So that’s why you like Scorpio? Because it killed my favorite constellation…? Wow Connor…”

“What? Fuck no, that’s not the reason! How in the hell was I supposed to know your favorite fucking constellation was Orion? And go fuck yourself, I’ve liked that constellation way before I knew you,” snapped Connor.

“Anyways,” you sighed, wanting to change the subject. “What’s the story behind Ursa Major?”

Connor sneered a bit as he answered, “That’s a simple story of Zeus being a horny bastard again. There was this nymph named Callisto, who was beautiful and thus gained Zeus’ sexual attention. Callisto followed Artemis and, knowing that, Zeus came to the nymph in the form of the goddess she followed. Zeus then rapes Callisto and gets her pregnant. When it was found out that she was pregnant, Callisto was kicked out of Artemis’ group. Hera is of course both infuriated and jealous as she learns that the nymph bore Zeus a son, and out of her infuriation turns Callisto into a bear. After living in the wilderness for years, Callisto is killed by her own son, who did not know the bear he had just killed was his mother. She was set in the stars following her death. And now she stays, immortalized in the constellation Ursa Major.”

You gasped at the story behind Ursa Major. “Yeesus, Con. That’s a really fucked up story. Do you know anymore?” you asked, genuinely even more interested in the myths behind the constellations.

Your genuine interest, and the 180 from seemingly being annoyed, melted his annoyance away. “Oh?” he stammered for a second. When you blinked at him, he cleared his throat, recovering his cool. “Uhh… no, I don’t know the rest of their backstories. Hell, I don’t even know all of the other ones. I only know the Zodiac, you know like fucking Capricorn and stuff, plus Ursa Major, Ursa Minor, Orion and Scorpio,” he said.

“You know Scorpio is one of the Zodiacs, right?” you giggled.

Connor’s thoughts sputtered at your giggle. “Wh-what?” he said, stumbling for a second before your words truly sank in. “O-oh yeah, of course I knew that, dork. You’d have to be a fucking idiot to not know that. It’s just,” he trailed off, somewhat stuttering, “it’s just that since Scorpio is one of my favorites, I lump it with Ursa Major.”

“Oh,” you spoke, humming in thought. “Yeah, I can see that.” It was at that moment that you heard your phone ringing from Connor’s truck. You stood up and looked at him, stuttering, “I, uhh, I should probably get that, it could be my mom.” He nodded and you awkwardly backed away towards his truck.

When you got to the passenger side door you opened the door and leaned into the truck, your lower half sticking out and answered your ringing phone. You hadn’t even looked to see who it was when you answered, “Ciao, this is (y/n) (y/l/n), what’d’ya need?”

Immediately your ear was filled with Jared’s voice, “Yo, (y/n), are you can Connor going to go to the party I was texting you about earlier? Look, I know you said you would prolly be fucking right now, but listen: you should totally come with me and Evan, and Connor, to this party. You seem like the girl who has never had fun with getting drunk in her life! TIME TO LIVE A LITTLE!!”

Rolling your eyes you said, “We actually just got finished with like, round three. I think we can take a break and go to a party with you and Smol Bean. But lemme double check with Con, I gotta mute myself real quick.” Muting yourself you hear Jared tell you go for it. Pushing yourself off the seat and out of the car you looked at Connor before calling out to him, “Hey, Con! Can you come here real quick?”

Connor looked back at you, sighed and pushed himself off the grassy ground. You watched as he swatted some dirt off of his pants and hoodie, walking over to you. “Hey? The fuck do you need, dork?” he asked.

“Oh, Glasses Kink just was asking if we were going to go to the party tonight with him and Ev. Can we?” you asked, giving him your best puppy eyes. “I’ve never been to a party before and who better to go with than my teacher and our friends?”

An eyebrow raised in question as Connor asked, “Are you sure that you want to go, (y/n)? Because you don’t know how well you can hold your alcohol. And Christ knows I can’t have you getting fucking alcohol poisoning because you drink too much.”

“You act as if you won’t be there to make sure I don’t get that messed up, Connor. But, anyways, yes, I’m sure I wanna go. Even Jared said I gotta live a little,” you said.

Both you and Connor heard Jared’s voice asking, “Hello? Are you still there? I hope you aren’t fucking her without unmuting me, Murphy! Lemme hear them moans of hers! And I need the fucking answer like, within the next hour, because that is when this party starts.”

An devilish smile swept across your face as an evil idea popped into your head. “Wanna make Glasses Kink think we’re doing shit?” you questioned, “Like you touch me and I’ll make it seem like you’re fingering me as I tell Glasses we’re gonna go to the party? You up for it?”

Connor smiled back at you with an equally as evil smirk. “You’re such an evil bitch, you know that? And you see, this is exactly one of the several reasons why I find you so goddamn attractive,” he said without thinking. The moment those words left his mouth, he wanted to shoot himself in the foot.

Luckily for Connor, you had not been paying much attention to him after his first sentence, as you were trying to find the perfect position to be in while you two had sex. “Yeah, I know I’m a bitch, Con. Now come here and let’s make him think we’re having sex,” you said.

Phew, she didn’t hear what I said… Pay more attention to what you say, fucking moron! You’ve only been talking to her for 2-3 days, don’t scare her off by fucking telling her you’re already so goddamned attracted to her yet, he thought to himself as he moved towards you. Connor found himself thinking to himself how hot it would be to fuck you against the hood of his truck now, as that was where you leaning, waiting for him. When he was a few inches in front of you, he stopped and watched you.

Your eyes flickered with mischief as you signaled for him to touch you. “Okay, start touching me, Con. I’m about to unmute him,” you said with a devious smile. Connor nodded at you and leaned over you, latching his lips to your neck—something which you actually hadn’t prepared for. His hands were on different spots on your body, one on your hips and one stroking your waist. As your breath hitched, you unmuted Jared and said, “Sorry, Jared! I-I checked with Con and—fuck—yeah, we-we’re gonna c-c…” Connor bit your neck and you genuinely moaned into the phone, “Oh God, yes, more!”

“So you’re gonna come?” asked Jared, “Also, those are some sexy moans, (y/n). One day I shall be the one making you moan like that, I can do such a better than Murphy.”

Connor growled against your neck and said, pulling away from you, “Absolutely not, Kleinman. (Y/n) is mine and if I ever see a hickey that I didn’t make anywhere on her body, I will throttle you myself. Understand me, Jared?” He was almost getting territorial over you.

“Sure, dude, sure. Whatever makes you feel better about yourself, Murphy. You know I could fuck your girl better than you. Now, this is all besides the point, you need to come get me and Evan.”

“Really? Really, Jared! I’m sitting here, trying to fuck my fucking girl and you want me to stop and get you and Evan?” Connor asking in a semi-annoyed tone. Of course he was playing along with your prank, rather convincingly, too you added to yourself.

A breathless laugh escaped your body as you answered, “C-come on, Con. Give Jared a break, he just wants us to go have fun with him and Ev.”

Connor’s eyes met your gaze and he sighed, “Fine. Fucking fine. If you want to go to this party, then who am I to stand in your way?” You nodded excitedly, a wide and gentle smile on your lips. “Okay, put on your shirt and we’ll go pick up those two dumbasses.”

Both you and Jared squealed in happiness, a manly squeal on Jared’s part, might you add. “Yay,” you two said in unison. “Okay, we’ll be at your house in like fifteen to twenty minutes, Jared! Because I know that Con knows where you live!” you exclaimed, pushing Connor off of you.

“Okay, see you then, sexy,” Jared all but purred. You could hear the wink in his voice and you rolled your eyes. You gave a curt, ‘yeah, see you then’ before hanging up.

The bright smile from moments ago was still present on your face as you jumped into Connor’s truck. “C’mon, Con! We gotta go! I’m ready to paaarty,” you said in a happy, sing-song voice.

A sigh left Connor’s lips as he moved to the driver’s seat and started the truck. “You’re so fucking special, (y/n). You know that?” he spoke quietly, looking over at you and shaking his head.

“Yeah, I know, thanks for reminding me, Murphy,” you retorted, looking down at your phone. Possibly texting Jared or even Evan. Connor rolled his eyes and pulled off, intent on going to get Evan and Jared. You really wanted to go to this party and he would make sure you did, even if he wasn’t sure you were ready for that.

Thirty minutes later, Jared and Evan were in the backseat of the truck with you and Conor. “Murphy!” called Jared from the back.

“What, Kleinman?” asked Connor.

“Can we listen to Deepthroat?”

A scoff left Connor’s throat as he said, “Tch. No fucking way, Kleinman. Not in my truck.”

“But (y/n) needs to hear this song,” insisted Jared. The geek nudged Evan’s shoulder, saying, “Right, Evan? She needs to hear this song, riiiight?”

Evan stuttered in your defense, “I-if she, well, if she wants to… umm… if she wants to hear the song… she, she can, Jar-Jared. Don’t, um, don’t force her to…”

The anxious blond’s stuttering answer left you smiling. “Thanks, Ev. He’s right, Jared, you can’t force me to listen to Deepthroat. I wanna listen to Arctic Monkeys,” you answered, looking back at the brown-haired geek.

A groan left Jared’s throat as he leaned back and covered his face, his hands slipping up into his hair as he fisted it briefly. “Are you serious?! You three are total killjoys!”

“Just wait until we get to the party, okay, Jared?” you said, smiling back at him.

He almost glared at you as he hissed, “You better make it up to me, fucking party poopers!”

You tapped your chin as you answered, “Oh, believe me, I will! I’ve never been drunk before, so it should be fun!”

Connor rolled his eyes, saying, “Meaning that I have to keep a close eyes on her, on top of keeping an eye on you and Evan, Jared. So fucking control yourself tonight. For once!”

“I always control myself, Connor. What are you talking about?” Jared spoke, placing a hand over his chest in disbelief.

“No, you don’t, Kleinman. You’re the one who ruins myself and Evan’s good time. Usually. There have been a few times where Evan’s ruined an outing, but those are few and far between, and it’s usually your dumb ass, Kleinman,” said Connor, a certain air of seriousness in his tone.

Evan snickered quietly to himself at Connor’s words and so did you. Jared was seemingly offended as he huffed, “Well, whatever! You’re wrong, Murphy, and you know it!”

You busted out laughing as Connor’s truck lurched to a stop in front of the party house. Your mouth dropped as you recognized the house. It was a friend of yours and Alexa’s, her name was Kayley. “Oh my God! This party is being held at Kayley’s house!?” you screamed in disbelief.

“Yeah, it is. You know her or something?” Jared asked, getting out of Connor’s truck.

Everyone got out of his truck and as you closed your door, you answered Jared. “Duh, of course I know her. She is a good friend of Lexy and myself. Why didn’t she or Lexy invite me to the party?”

Connor walked up beside you and wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you to walk towards the house with them. “I’m sure they fucking did invite you, dork. You were probably just not near your phone when they asked. Or you forgot about them asking you,” he reassured you.

You looked at him and nodded. “Yeah… you’re probably right, Con. But, like, how did you three get invited to this party? You aren’t even friends with Kayley.”

“I heard from a guy, who heard from one of Kayley’s friends, who heard from Kayley that you didn’t need an invite to come to this party. It’s a free-for-all. Anyone can come and go as they please,” came Jared’s explanation.

“Umm… I don’t think that’s how it works, but, okay…” you muttered as the four of you walked up to the front door. When you reach the door, Connor pushed you out in front of them, signaling that since you were friends with the hostess, that you should be in front. “Okay, okay, I’ll get us in,” you laughed and pushed open the door. The inside of Kayley’s house was flooded with people from school and you were determined to find your friend.

You pushed your way into the house-full of high school students and looked around for your friend, Connor, Jared and Evan following behind you—closing the front door behind them. “Excuse me, have you seen…” you tried to ask a girl who was stumbling drunkenly to the beat of a song. She completely ignored you which caused you to grit your teeth. You tried asking several other already drunken teens where Kayley or Alexa was, and was still ignored.

You were going to have to find out the hard way. Taking a deep breath, you prepared to scream. “EXCUSE ME!! WHERE THE FUCK CAN I FIND KAYLEY SUMMERS?!” you screamed at the top of your lungs into the sea of people.

As soon as you screamed that, someone screamed back, louder than you, “IN THE KITCHEN!! WHO THE FUCK’S ASKING FOR MY ASS?!”

“ME, YOU BITCH!! (Y/N) (Y/L/N)!!” you screamed back.

Connor, Jared and Evan all three looked at you in disbelief. You were really loud and they, especially Connor, hadn’t expected such a loud scream to come from such a shy girl like yourself. The four of you heard Kayley scream back to you, “CUUUUNT!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! COME INTO THE FUCKING KITCHEN!”

“FINE, I’M COMING!!” you screamed back before you shoved your way through the people. “Fucking move, assholes,” you growled as you shoved two girls into each other, not caring if they fell.

The three boys followed behind you, all genuinely surprised at your lack of caring as you angrily shoved through the people. Connor had never seen this side of you and, dare he say it, liked it. An amused smirk appeared on his face as he watched you nudge and shove people out of your way. “Wow,” he said to himself.

He had said it just loud enough for Jared and Evan to hear, too, and the geek replied with, “She is like… ten times hotter to me now.”

“I-I’ve never… umm… never thought she was capable of… capable of this,” stuttered Evan as he played with his shirt nervously. He was the one following closest behind you, followed by Connor, who was followed by Jared.

Connor’s eyes never left your figure as he watched you push a guy and his presumable girlfriend out of the doorway to the kitchen. “FUCKING MOVE! Go make out in the living room on the fucking couch, you pussies,” you growled before stopping in front of a girl.

All of the boys’ eyes fell onto your friend, on Kayley. She was moderately tall, about Evan’s height, and was the seemingly perfect amount of chubby. Like, she made it work, and worked it without it being classified as her being overweight. Kayley wore all black: a black tank-top, a lacy black push-up bra that made her big breasts look that much better (that could be seen underneath her top), and black skinny jeans. Her half-shaven, curly, midnight purple hair cascaded down to her collarbone and her thick-rimmed glasses drew attention to her hazel eyes. Kayley’s arms were opened wide, as she pulled you into a hug, exclaiming delightfully, “Biiiiitch!! What the fuck brings you to my party? I thought Alexa said you weren’t gonna come?”

You smiled and pulled away from the hug, motioning to the three boys behind you. “Well, Jared Kleinman told me that you said anyone was invited. So, Connor and I decided to come to your party with him and Evan Hansen,” you explained.

The midnight-haired girl clapped her hands excitedly as she shouted, “Oh yeah, of course anyone’s invited! Glad he convinced your pussy-ass to come tonight! You’ve always opted out of getting drunk with Alexa and I, (y/n/n)!”

Ruffling your hair almost embarrassedly, you said, “Yeah, sorry about it. I just never knew what I like to drink, ya know? Anyways, speaking of Alexa, where is she?”

Kayley eyed you with a smirk at the mention of your friend. “Oh, Alexa is upstairs getting it on with Jason Dawson! Now, besides the point,” she exclaimed, handing you, Connor, Jared and Evan red solo cups, “enjoy the party! I have beer kegs all throughout the house, some are filled with the best German beer, and some are full of vodka. And of course, the fridge and coolers are all stocked to the brim with beers. And guess who’s parents forgot to lock the liquor cabinet~? This bitch’s! So there’s prime tequila, vodka and whiskey available. If you want some, just hit me up.” Kayley then points to the cabinet behind her, continuing, “If you want a chaser for your hard liquor, we have them back there on that cabinet. And if we run out, there is more in the garage and basement. All—well, most—of the rooms are free if you want alone time with anyone and please God remember to use protection, okay? I can’t have my good friend getting knocked up at my fucking party, Alexa would have my fucking head!”

You laughed and held out your cup, saying, “Wanna hook me up with some whiskey?”

Smiling at your boldness, Kayley took your cup and said, “What do you want? We have some Monkey Shoulder Blended Malt Scotch, some Bushmills Black Bush Whiskey, or some Maker’s 46. Pick your poison, babe.”

“Give me what you think is best for a first-time drinker, such as myself,” you answered after a moment of silence.

Kayley nodded and poured you a cup of Maker’s 46. With a sly smile, she handed you the cup back and said, “Drink up, girl. Now remember, this is your first time drinking and so this will burn for a bit. Then it’ll make you feel warm and fuzzy. Also, (y/n/n), we have a special stash of fruity Mike’s Hard Lemonade for you stored in the basement. Alexa and I thought that if you came, we’d start you easy. So, if this liquor is too much for you and you want to ease yourself into this, go downstairs, okay? There is nothing wrong with putting off your first high school bender, you hear me?”

You nodded before sipping on your drink. The burning sensation smacked you right in the face and you enjoyed the feeling of liquid fire sliding down your throat. It tasted amazing, too. “I will, Kayley, thanks. I think I’m gonna go sit out by the pool,” you said and started to walk away.

Connor caught your waist and said, “No, no, no. No fucking way am I letting you out of my sight with this being your first party.”

“But Connoooor,” you whined, “I know my way around this house as if it were my own! And I can handle myself!”

Dragging you with him, Connor walked over to the fridge and grabbed a beer from it. “I don’t care whether you know this house or not, (y/n), you’re not leaving my sight for any reason,” he said seriously.

Jared had gotten a cup of vodka while Evan got a small amount of whiskey and mixed it with Coca-Cola. After getting their drinks, they waded over to you and Connor. “So, sexy, where’s a place where we can chill?” Jared asked you, sipping on his vodka.

“Since Kayley’s parents are fucking loaded, there is a balcony on the second floor overlooking the pool… but, I wanna go sit by the pool,” you said.

Kayley pipped in, “Also, you can go swimming, just not when you’re wasted!! I can’t have people dying at my fucking party!”

Taking another swig/sip of your whiskey, you said, “See? Let’s go sit in the backyard!”

Connor rolled his eyes and pulled you towards the exit of the kitchen, Jared and Evan following you two. “Where is the backyard?” he almost sneered, looking down at you.

You pointed in the direction of the backyard, saying into your cup, “That way, Murphy.”

The four of you waded through the sea of people for about a minute to a minute and a half before you reached the door to Kayley’s backyard. Connor opened the door and lead you three out behind him, all the while his arm had still been wrapped around your waist, keeping you close to him. When you saw that there were only a few people outside, you smiled and drank some more of your drink. “See? Not a lot of people out here, so you can let go of me, Connor,” you said, swatting his hand away from your waist.

Connor sat down at a table on the patio and opened his beer. The can hissed as it was opened and the first thing he did was take a large swig of it. It wasn’t anything good or anything, but it was something to get buzzed on. His eyes watched as you, Jared and Evan sat around the table with him. “So, how’re ya liking your fucking drink, dork?” he asked, his eyes looking directly at you.

Taking another swig, you answered him, “I like it, Con. It burns like hell, but tastes good and also goes down pretty smooth. I can’t get enough. I think I’m almost a quarter of the way done with it already? I dunno, but I really like it. How’s the beer?”

He shrugged at your question, answering, “It’s beer. Nothing to bat an eye about. It tastes the same as every other beer does.”

You turned your gaze to Evan and asked, “How’s your Coke-Whiskey combo tasting, Ev?”

Evan’s brown eyes darted to yours and he nervously tapped his cup. “I-it’s good, (y/n)… thanks for, umm, thanks for asking,” he answered nervously.

You smiled at his stuttering and then turned your (e/c) gaze to Jared, who was smirking, ready for your question. “So, Jared… how’s your vodka?” you asked.

“Why thank you for asking, (y/n)! It is delicious and strong, but I think it could use something else?” he smirked.

A smirk also graced your lips as you answered, “Oh yeah? And what else could it use, Jared?”

“A side of your moans,” he said with a dirty grin.

Connor growled and glared at him, “Not a chance, Kleinman.”

Jared narrowed his eyes at Connor, as if challenging him. “Oh? And why not? I can’t recall you ever saying that you and (y/n) were dating, Murphy. Just that you two were fucking, so that means you’re fuck-buddies. MEANING, she could have sex with anyone she wants to, right? Who says she couldn’t have sex with me, huh,” he challenged Connor.

You and Evan’s mouths drop and you both looked at Connor’s now angered face and Jared’s stupid, cocky grin. He knew he had hit a nerve, but he also knew he was right. And you couldn’t say he was wrong, either. “Well…” you hummed, casting your gaze towards Connor, “Jared’s not entirely wrong, Con.” You could feel the anger building up in Connor as he heard your words, the anger washing over his facial expressions as he seemingly loomed over you, looking down harshly at you.

He knew you were right, but he didn’t want you and Jared to fuck. Partially because he had not even gotten into your pants and he’d be damned if he let Jared be the first. The other half of him just didn’t like the idea of Jared having sex with you, probably because Connor was beginning to develop maybe-feelings for you. “Absolutely not,” Connor spoke sternly, “I don’t care if we are fuck-buddies or not, (y/n), Jared is not going to make you moan like I can. Got it?”

Jared groaned, tipping back his cup, drinking a large gulp of vodka. “You are a fucking cock-block, Murphy. Though, honestly, isn’t it really (y/n)’s choice?” the geek asked, looking at you.

You ignore the geek’s look and looked at Evan, taking a large swig of your whiskey, saying, “Welp… if you two keep fighting and being rude with each other, then this ain’t gonna be fun.”

“I have to, umm, have to agree with you, (y/n),” spoke Evan, looking at his bubbly concoction of Coke and whiskey.

You follow Evan’s lead and looked down at your cup, it was then that you noticed you had drank all the rest of it. When did that happen? “Yeesus… when did I drink the rest?” you asked out loud.

“When Jared and Connor started bickering…” answered Evan, taking a sip of his drink.

Right, guess I subconsciously did it when they started, you thought to yourself as you stared at your empty cup. The whiskey was good and you wanted more. And so you were going to get more. Pushing yourself away from the table, you stood and asked, “I need more liquor. Anybody else in need of a refill and wanna join me?”

Jared stood up and said, looking at his now empty cup, “Yeah, I need a refill, too. I’ll go with you.”

Connor eyed the two of you and said, taking a swig of his beer, “Go get your drinks and come right back, you fucking hear me?”

“Aye, aye, captain!” you exclaimed, giving Connor a mocking salute as you turn to Jared. “Let’s go, Glasses Kink.” You smiled widely as you nudged Jared.

The geek smiled and said, “Yeah, let’s go get more drinks.” After he said that, the two of you disappeared into the crowded house. Once you two were inside the house and away from the back door, Jared’s arm found its way nestled around your waist. With a scoff, he said into your ear, “Murphy, right? Can you believe he won’t let you have fun with me, sexy?”

“Yeesus, Jared, it’s fine. He let us walk away together, didn’t he? Who knows what will happen while we’re on this trek together,” you spoke with a hint of devious intent in your voice.

Jared smiled just as deviously to you. “You’re evil, you know that, (y/n)?” he said to you with that smile.

A devious, devilish smile curled onto your face as you answered him, pressing a finger to your lips, “Shhhh… don’t let others, know, Glasses Kink. It’s something I like to keep under wraps.”

“Jesus, why didn’t I meet you before Connor? The shit we could’ve been doing,” the geek said, pulling you two into the kitchen.

Kayley was on the dining room table, having body shots taken off her body by like three different attractive guys and you laughed. “Kay? Are we interrupting something?” you laughed, walking up to the table.

“Oh, yeah, babe! You back already?” she asked.

You smirked down at your midnight-haired friend as one of the attractive guys took another body shot off her. “Yeah, I’m back already. Connor and Jared started being rude to each other and I drank all my fucking whiskey. I need more. Can you get me more? Or am I gonna have to get it?” you asked with a grin.

A smile crossed Kayley’s face as one of the guys came up and planted a heated kiss onto her lips. Yeah, that was where that conversation ended before it even began. Kayley and the guy got into the kiss, the guy swinging the midnight-haired girl’s legs so they hung off the table as the kiss got hotter by the second. Kayley’s hands tangled into the guy’s hair and you rolled your eyes.

You turned towards the island in the middle of the kitchen and as you moved to grab the Maker’s 46 you knocked into someone. “Hey, watch where you’re—wait? Lexy,” you said.

Your best friend whipped her head around and saw you. “Oh my Goooooood, (y/n/n)! You’re here,” she said drunkenly as she slung her arm around your shoulder. “Have you and Kleinman played Spin The Bottle yet? Or Seven Minutes in Heaven? Cuz, bitch you gotta play those things!” Alexa slurred, her words jumbling together.

Jared laughed, “I mean, I’m up for Seven Minutes In Heaven, if you are, (y/n).”

“I’m up for it, just let’s get some more alcohol,” you said.

Alexa stumbled to the fridge and got you and Jared out two beers. “Here, alcohol,” she sang in a drunken stupor.

Both you and Jared took the beers, opened them and looked at each other, still wanting the hard liquor you two had come in for. “Bet you I could chug my beer faster than you, Jared,” you challenged.

Jared’s eyebrows raised in amusement as he said, “I bet you a make-out session that I win.”

“I’ll take that bet,” you exclaimed. Turning to Alexa you asked her, “Can you tell us when to go?”

Looking at you with the eyes of a drunken person, Alexa nodded and wobbled. “On your marks… get set… g-go…” she said, slamming her hands onto the island signaling for you two to start chugging.

You and Jared tipped back your beer cans and started chugging. The horse-piss tasting liquid rushed down your throat as you gulped it down, grimacing to yourself at the taste. You were determined to win.

Several moments go by and Jared is the first to slam his empty can onto the island cabinet. He had won by a landslide of a few seconds. Gasping for air briefly, he said, “I won, sexy. You know what that means.”

You slammed down your beer can and wiped the excess beer-foam away with the back of your hand. A large burp bubbled up from your stomach and you burped discreetly. “Excuse me,” you said, pounding your fist against your chest to make sure nothing else was going to come up. “Also, yes I know what that means. Where do ya wanna do this?”

Jared shrugged and said, “I’m not opposed to right here, if you aren’t.”

“Dude, I kinda just wanna make out with you right now. Lemme be honest. I also kinda wanna piss Connor off,” you said with a sly smile.

Alexa snuck up behind you and pushed you to Jared, smiling a dirty grin as she said, “Get yourself a face-full of geek, (y/n)!”

You looked up at Jared and smiled deviously. “Oh yeah, I’m gonna get me some geek, Lexy,” you purred as you cupped Jared’s face. “You ready, Glasses?”

Jared smiled and cupped your cheek as well. “Dude, I've waited to fucking kiss you since Connor started talking about you,” he whispered.

“Then kiss me, Jared. Fuck, dude,” you said, leaning towards his lips. You barely could make out what he whispered before your lips crashed together. Almost immediately, you felt one of Jared’s hands pulling you, by the waist, against his body and the other started to gently caress your cheek. Your hands immediately flew to his head and pulled him closer to you, lips moving feverishly and almost desperately against his own. Like you needed this kiss with him.

His lips tasted like beer with a hint of something else, the vodka you ventured, and for some reason, you couldn’t get enough. Your tongue swiped along his bottom lip, absorbing the flavors of the beer and strong vodka, and you hummed in absolute delight. A gasp left your lips as you felt Jared grab at your butt and you felt his tongue expertly sneak its way into your mouth. The fight for dominance was on and, truth be told, Jared was winning. But only because he kept groping your butt and pulling you against him, causing you to gasp and lose your focus.

You and Jared’s heated make-out session in the middle of the kitchen caused even, ‘GET IT, GEEK’ at Jared. Why were they yelling this at Jared? Well, at that point, he had pushed your back up against the island, and the hand that was on your cheek was now caught in your hair; his other hand that had been grabbing your butt ran down the curve of your butt to the back of your thigh, which he raised and hooked around his waist because you know, he was horny then.

He was making out with you heavily, and knowing that Connor was trying to stake a claim on you made this all the more exciting for Jared. The slight drunkenness that was washing over him also fueled his desires to do anything with you. The slight, almost silent moan that was emitted from your throat as he tugged on your hair almost sent him into overdrive. That was until he was forcefully ripped away from you, prematurely ending the make-out session. “Dude, what the fuck?! Can’t you see we were making out?!” Jared nearly screamed, completely unhappy he was torn away from you.

When your vision came back into focus, you were face-to-face with a red-faced Connor. Anger boiled in his veins and you could tell you were in trouble. Everyone in the kitchen knew you were going to get it. Your breath hitched as you spoke, clearing your throat and waving nervously, “H-hey, Connor…”

“Is that all you have to say, (y/n)?” He spoke with venom in his voice. “You and Kleinman are gone for twenty goddamn minutes and what do I find you fucks doing? Making out in the fucking kitchen, making a damn scene out of it!! I walked into this shitty, overcrowded house and what’s the first damn thing I hear? Hmm? Well, what do you think, (y/n)?” Connor sneered at you venomously.

Not knowing what to say, you shrug and look away from Connor. “I dunno…” you said.

Connor grabbed your face and snapped your gaze towards his fiery, enraged one. His nostrils flared as he clenched and unclenched his jaw, trying to calm down before he spoke. Why did he seem so territorial and possessive of you, it wasn’t like you two were dating. Having taken a moment to cool off, Connor hissed through gritted teeth, “I hear people chanting ‘Get it, geek! Get it geek!’ and so I follow the chanting and what do I see? My friend bent over my girl, having a rather heated, messy, drunk make-out session with her. So I’m sure you can imagine how pissed I am right now.”

You nodded nervously, but at the same time, you felt yourself grow excited. “Y-yeah? And? Who says I’m your girl, Connor…” you challenged, immediately regretting it.

The moment those words left your mouth, Connor was on you in a more heated way than Jared was. This kiss was angry and fast. Connor’s hand wound its way into your hair and tugged harshly, causing a kiss-muffled moan to echo through the noisy-turned-silent kitchen.

Everyone watched as Connor’s other hand played with your breast through the shirt you wore. They saw how you squealed and arched into his touch, your hands flinging themselves into his hair as you seemingly held on for dear life. They saw Connor’s hand descend from your clothed breast to the front of your jeans. With bated breath, everyone’s drunken eyes watched as Connor’s hand fell into your jeans after he popped open the button. Kayley screamed, “HOLY FUCK, (Y/N) IS GETTING ALL THE GUYS” as you moaned because of Connor’s touch.

He had no idea why he was now fingering you, hazily drunk, in your good friend’s kitchen. All Connor really knew was that he was pissed and wanted you to know that even though you weren’t dating, you were his. The warmth that swallowed his fingers was so hot that he swore he could’ve been burned by it. He pulled away from your lips, only to place hot, open-mouthed kisses to your throat and neck. “This is what you get for letting Kleinman touch what’s mine,” he growled into your neck, curling his fingers to hit your g-spot. (Which he guess because the drug dealer he would have sex with taught him where it was, yay you.)

You bit your lower lip hard and looked down at him with drunk, hooded eyes. “C-c’mon, Con… n-not here… every-everyone’s looking…” you muttered.

“You wanted to make out with Jared in the damn kitchen, you can get fingered by me in the damn kitchen,” he growled, biting into your neck while continuing working your body towards a high.

Alexa and Kayley were not helping. They were sitting there, cheering Connor on as he fingered you. “Come on, Murphy! (Y/n)’s never had an orgasm before! Make. her. cum,” they cheered.

You glared weakly at them before Connor again assaulted your g-spot roughly. “Y-you cunts are supposed to hELP me,” you squealed as Connor hit your g-spot with a particularly powerful thrust. “Fuck, Con…” you moaned, combed a hand through his hair.

Connor smiled against your skin as you moaned his name, “See? I’m the only one who’s name you get to moan in pleasure like this, you hear me?!”

An unfamiliar coil started to tighten in your gut as Connor assaulted your body with heated kisses that trailed to your collarbone and the battering assault to your lower region. “C-connor…” you breathed out.

Alexa and Kayley lost their drunken minds as they knew you were getting close. “Keep going, Connor! She’s almost there! We can see it in her face!�� they yelled.

Looking up, Connor saw what they were talking about. You were lost in bliss, eyes closed and your chest rising and falling erratically, and lower lip being bitten to suppress the moans threatening to tumble out. Oh, he wanted to see the face you made as you fell off the edge of pleasure that he got you to. One last bite on her sweet spot and a thrust to her g-spot should send her over the edge, he thought to himself. Licking his lips, he was prepared to send you over that brink that you had never gotten yourself to.

As the coil was wound even tighter, you felt the orgasm that always eluded you barreling towards you. Half of you was ready to experience your first orgasm, but the other half was terrified like always. What if a little pee came out? That was the what if that got to you most of all. You were still fully clothed, you didn’t want to come and pee yourself, that wasn’t hot or sexy. That was gross. Your anxiety slowly ebbed at your orgasm, keeping it at bay. Kept it from bursting through the flood gates that was you worries and fears.

But all those worries and fears come to a halt as Connor bit the sweet spot on your neck and thrusted his fingers against your g-spot at just the right moment. And it made you lose your mind. The coil snapped as you had your first orgasm, and you loudly moaned Connor’s name as you pulled his hair.

The world melted around you for a few brief moments as you watched Connor pull his hand out of your jeans and clean his fingers of your fluids with his tongue. You died at the image, never wanting it to go away. A smug smirk rested on his lips and you cocked your head, wondering why he would have that egotistical smirk.

Then it all came crashing back. Your ear filled with the clamoring of drunk teenagers, as they all murmured about what just happened. You had just been fingered to your first orgasm… in one of your best friends’ kitchen, while drunk and at a party. You had had your first orgasm in front of like thirty people, that were crowded into the kitchen, your two best friends, Jared and Evan.

The embarrassment hit you in one fell-swoop. Despite now being drunk, you covered your face and whined, “OH MY GOD!! I’M SO EMBARRASSED!!”

Alexa and Kayley looked at you and said, “Dude, girl, why? That was the hottest thing that’s happened all night!”

“Girl, you made out with Kleinman. Then Connor came in and made out with you, then proceeded to finger you to your very first orgasm. And I’m sure I speak for everyone when I say your moans were actually pretty hot,” Kayley finished with a large, drunken grin.

Alexa laughed and pointed at Evan, “Your moans even got Evan excited, (y/n).”

Evan blushed and covered up his crotch in embarrassment of being pointed out. “W-why me?” he asked shyly.

“Because you're the shy innocent one, Hansen,” quipped Kayley with a giggle. “And you’re the one nobody really expected to get excited. We all expected Kleinman to get hornier, because he was the one making out with her. Yeah, you missed that, by the way. Lemme tell you, that geek was getting it before Connor came in.”

“If Connor hadn’t come in, I’m sure they would’ve dry-fucked each other,” laughed Alexa, leaning over the island. “Because that’s the direction it looked like it was goin’!”

The drunken Jared huffed, crossing his arms, “It was going that way, but fucking Cock-Block Murphy here decided to ruin it!”

Connor glared back at the brown-haired geek, sneering, “That’s because I told you: (y/n) is mine and you aren’t allowed to touch her.”

You blushed and still had your face covered, still embarrassed. “But still, I came for the first time in front of so many people…”

“It’s fine, (y/n/n). It was hot and I don’t think anybody minded,” said Kayley. “ANYWAYS, off that topic, LET’S CONTINUE THE DRINKING PARTY!!!”

Everyone raised their cups and beer cans into the air, cheering, “AGREED!” And thus the party continued like what just happened never did occur. Except you, Connor, Jared and Evan all knew what happened as you were the least drunk people at the party. You knew Jared would never let you live it down, and you knew Connor would be smug about being the first person to bring you to and orgasm, and poor Evan would never be able to erase your moans from his head.

But, a big question plagued your mind throughout the night: Why did Connor get so angry at you making out with Jared? Could it be that your long-time crush was starting to develop feelings for you? The thought caused your heart to lurch, and you smiled at the notion that he might be growing feelings for you. That was what you wanted more than anything. The more drunk you got, the more you wanted to tell Connor your feelings, but somehow had to sense enough not to breath a word of your feelings to him.

#connor murphy x reader #connor murphy #connor murphy imagine #dear evan hansen #dear evan hansen x reader #evan hansen #evan hansen imagine #jared kleinman #jared kleinman imagine #zoe murphy #dear evan hansen imagine #deh imagine #deh

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astoldbymrsbear · 5 years

Text

#bearyasus

29th March 2019.

You haven’t been home for a few days now. Yes, I yang halau. Yes, I was mad pissed with you. Why do you have to lie to me? Who am I to you?

Each time I ask myself, my heart breaks. Each time I ask myself, I cry.

Do I matter to you even?

I have high doubts in that, cause you were not there when I needed you the most. You drive me to my grave. You choose to prioritise your “friends” & “brothers”. I know what it brings you.Fast & Easy Money which comes with short term joy. Trust me in this. We’ve been through it before, remember? The good times ended so quickly.

What I was trying to tell you is that something good doesn’t come easy, My Love.

Jannah is not cheap.

I love you that much, b. I love you that much. I want the best in everything for you. Duniawi wa Ukhrawi, sayang.

;(

Yet time and again, I wasn’t made your number one priority. Time and again you lied to me for their sake. The people who are not in your list of responsibilities.

What do I mean to you? Where do I stand in your life, b? Can you enlighten me?

I want my husband back. I want my kids to have their father again. Someone they can run to and manja with and hug.

I went to the clinic to bring Auliya for her Sunat and Tindik alone, b. Where were you? Busy carik duit? You can’t even make time for your one & only daughter? I handled the three of them single-handedly. Do you know that Aiman went up to hug a pakcik who had a bout the same built as you at the clinic? My poor babyson mistook him for you. The lost look in his eyes when he was trying to make it out if it was you or not. That betrayed look in his eyes when that pakcik was not you. When that pakcik did not carry him. When that pakcik whom he thought was you just giggled and walked away as I pulled him away. My poor babyson. ;(

Aden. He had to do more than he should at 8-going-on-to-9 years old. Keep an eye on Aiman all the time while I carry Auliya. My boyson. My poor boyson. Taking on the responsibilities without a choice. He have yet to master caring for himself independently yet already given the role to care for his baby brother.

Absent Father was the right description for you then.

We prolly made our decision in haste huh? To get married. To have kids together.

There were numerous telltale signs for me back then. But I was clouded by what I thought as “LOVE”.

I should have left the minute you doubted me. But no. I chose to stay. To prove you that I was nothing like what you think. To prove to you that nothing about you or your shortcomings could drive me away. I chose to stay for your companionship. To give you the love you lost. To be with you through any sort of hardships. To help you in all sense. To be the soulmate that you yearned for. This relationship started of with the basis of proving you wrong. Probably it has proven me wrong now. When you didn’t give me the chance to prove to you from the very beginning, I still chose to stay.

If i ever give up on you now or anytime soon or in the future, understand how painful it was for me as well. You were the love I loved wholeheartedly. Sincerely I gave you my heart. yet you crushed it effortlessly. The endless multiple chances given, always having your back when you did wrong or lacked, when even your family doubted you so much, I truly accepted you for who you were. Understand that it took everything I had left inside of me to leave you alone and helpless. Thank you for the good times. The memories. Our kids, your offsprings. They are my world now. MashaAllah.

What went wrong? Whose to blame? - Only Allah knows.

You find comfort in “brotherhood” and such. It gives you a sense of belonging. Despite the facade of close knit relationships, you did not grow up discussing feelings. You are close on the surface only. You were conditioned to believe sweeping things under the rug/pretending there are no problems, is the way to go/will make the problems go away. You believe in keeping things from people in order to avoid confrontations and to keep the peace.

So whose fault is it?

As for me, I have always loved quiet times and deep conversations. I love communicating, discussing feelings, ideals, ambitions, fears, worries etc. You do know that, don’t you? I come from a broken home. Love was tough on us. Beatings was a norm. my parent’s absence was all we had. But that’s not what i dream for with this family of choice with you. I loved to let my feelings out. Talk, discuss, text, scream, shout, write, sing. be truthful to you about my feelings cause I too hate insecurity. I would love to have nothing gets swept under the rug. I believe in speaking the truth even when it is hard and it hurts. Cause when the truth from your lie surface up later, it is more painful. The feelings of betrayal. Losing trust. Why do we have to lead our marriage based on lies, right?

May Allah only make you realise. Realise my worth before it’s too late.

Who was there for you, Yang? Who was loyal to you and your family to no end? Did you ever have to do for my family what I did for your family? I don't have to type here what I'm talking about. You know what I mean. Who remained loyal to you? Me. Why? Conditioning. I may have come from a broken home but I believe in loyalty and I live for it everyday.

Even after the multiple times you betrayed my trust, I try no matter how hard to build back the trust for you. When you and Fitri got involved with drugs and “brotherhood” behind my back, I try to be the supportive wife. Help you get out of it in any way I could. Using Islam as a basis. This was supposed to be your duty, guiding me and the kids. Yet I shouldered the responsibility myself. Doesn’t matter you blamed me that the house felt like kubur then. When in actuality, I was still weak and only recovering from the very bad morning sickness from being pregnant with our one and only daughter. Why? Because I wanted you to be happy. It really didn’t matter whether or not I was happy. Your’s came as a priority for me. Can you for once do the same for me? I fought with my family for you. I believed in you when they put you down. I rebutted and told my uncle that you will change and that you are not like them. Yet again you proven them right and me wrong. What do I get in return? Betrayals after betrayals. Lies after lies. Why, Yang? Why? Who am I to you? Where do I stand in your life?

I still smiled for you even though I did not and still do not, come first. It was still my pure and sincere love for you that pushed me through.

You often point out to me that I'm a very angry person. I have issues. Do you know how wth that makes me feel? It is as though you have no clue, what are the accumulating factors leading to my being angry. Why were you not the man, my husband, the one to guide me?

You do realize that I am also a loving and understanding person, right? Yet you lie to me about everything and anything under the sun. For whom? For those who were not there during your hard times. For those who brought you short term happiness. How do you reconcile being angry ALL THE TIME and being very loving, understanding and affectionate too? So I wish to clarify, I am not an angry person. I have things I'm angry about yes, but that doesn't mean anger is synonymous with my name. It is the Effects of the hurt and pain which you Caused, that is why the anger's directed at you. I am fully aware that when I'm angry, I'm truly horrible. I say a lot of things that hurts you. I hate being angry. It takes a lot of energy to get angry. Which is why I don't understand why you keep doing things to trigger that anger, knowing full well the effects/consequences that come with. We’ve had our talks heart to heart occasionally. When I let out what’s bottled up in me. Yet time and again, you fail to understand me. Feel me. Give me what I need.

At this point in our lives though, we should want to be happy together. Do similar things, share similar goals, have ambitions and plans with regards to where this family is headed. For this world and Aakhirah. - But are you with me? Have you been with me all these times? Not just physically 'showing support' but to want these things for yourself too.

You will say yes. But who's the one still sneaking in time to just go with the same old friends without his wife knowing? When she's hard at work hustling to be able to put food on the table and get things paid for and she thinks he's at work but he isn't. He feels it's important to be with his friends more than being there for her as she struggles to make life better in every aspect for herself and her family.

Where were you when I was struggling to find Allah SWT? Shouldn't you be the one leading me, catching my fall? But no, I had to find my own way and when I found my peace, you conveniently decided to follow my lead. Do you understand what this says about you as a person? As a man?

Where were you when the kids were not well, throwing out and having diarrhea? Who helped me clear up the mess? Not you, for sure. Two kids down with sickness and I had to still breastfeed our beloved daughter. And I myself caught the bug later on. Did you even bother to ask if I had taken my medicine? How was I coping at home? I know you know that I could manage it somehow. But a simple message asking me those questions would make me feel like I mattered. Maybe also include your whereabouts and probably let me know when you would be home. Updates about you. Because you matter to me that’s why I want to know. Yet at the same time, I respect you as an adult.

You do have your good points.You help out with housework. You cook for me sometimes. you are quite hands on with the kids. But here's the thing.

- Every time you help me with the housework, that is pahala for you. Allah swt is using me as a means to create an avenue for you to collect for your tabung akhirat. The housework that you do, are all stuff that you have to do anyways, even without a wife. It's just laundry, dishes, occasional washing of toilet. I still have to do all that as well. It's not entirely on you. You are to compare yourself to those who do more, not those who do less or nothing. If you think you do alot, imagine my load. - When you are hands on with your kids, you are making memories with them, that's what they will remember you for. I shouldn't have to tell you what or how to do it. You should take pride in teaching your son how to ride a bike, how to ngaji, how to love Maths. It should be what you want to do, with pride and zest. Not because I am making you do all these or directing you to.

At this point in our lives, it should affect you if I am doing better. In every sense. My blood, sweat and tears. With or without you having a job, I never held my money back from you. It would have amounted to more than $10, 000 Ibelieve. All I ever did and am still doing, is give and share. Give and Share. That's me. I am not selfish and I have NEVER been. I don’t believe in being selfish at all. Cause I know how it feels to have none. At this juncture, you should not have ANY excuses for being unable to do the part Allah SWT instructed you to do, as a man. I know how you are always financially unstable, that why I step in. And I don’t mind it at all. Cause like me, you were send to me by Allah as an avenue for me to collect for my tabung akhirat.

You are enabled to believe you're without flaws. Not me. I want to keep doing more and giving more, because Allah SWT keeps giving me avenues to do more. That's why I keep pushing limits and I give my best each and every time. Why do I not inspire you though? Why?

One simple fact remains tho, I had to step up cos you never did.

Amanah is such a big deal to me and it should be as such to every Muslim, even you. Especially you actually, cause you're a man. When I bring this up, you tell me that you can't tell me what to do cos I can't listen. Why is that so? Ever thought if it was how you are as a leader?

As a wife,I wanted so much to be loved, protected, defended and respected. I have to ask for a hug that does not lead to us making out. I have to ask for cakes. I have to ask for communication. I have to ask. I have to tell. I have to. All on me.

Do you know that it’s the little things that make my heart full. I am that simple.Then I think about my needs. Why are my needs not met? Does wanting my needs met make me selfish? Are my demands so crazy that it can't be done. Up till now, do you know what I LOVE?

- Buttercream Cakes & Chocolate Cakes or any kind of desserts.

- Love letters and Cards fresh roses sometimes?

- My favourite Almond Chocolate by Cadbury

- My favourite cookies n cream ice cream

- Random acknowledgements and affirmations on social media and in private

- How Are Yous, I Love Yous and I Miss Yous

- Sending me songs that remind you of me/your love for me

Stuff like that. Not financial security. Not luxurious items. Not thoughtless gifts and gestures just because you're forced to. I am not an afterthought. I should be a priority.

Why do you have to make loving me, be like this difficult task you have yet to master/accomplish. Despite everything I tirelessly give out, unconditionally, am I not worth the efforts mentioned above? After all these years of sticking by you.

That's what hurts. If I have to ask and demand all that, then I don't want to anymore. You should wanna do all the above for me if you love me like you say you do. How can you say you love me when there's no fight in you to make me stay? Up till now, I am the only one crying still. You? Not a single tear shed, probably. And the question “What do I mean to you?” comes about again.

That accentuated your inconsistencies and lack of accountability/responsibility. Just letting me be the one doing so much more on top of having my own job to handle. It's like you had no empathy for me. Kesiankan I je buat apa? Tolong I, b. I know you are trying to find a job and earn money to help me with the financial aspect. But I got that covered. I wasn’t really worried about that much. But what help I need is physicality with the kids and the house. Then maybe the little time you have in the day when the kids are in school and I am at work, you can go kayuh and earn as much as you can to clear the bills. But of course, do it righteously. Don’t just use it as a means for you to go meet you friends and do otherwise. That’s lying to me.

You allow your family and outsiders to see me in such a negative light. It makes me wonder, is that what you truly think and feel of me? When do you step up and defend my integrity as your wife? I feel alone fighting all sorts of battles. Where are you, b? Where were you?

Yang, I would really like to know every single thing about you without having you to lie or keep anything from me. I just want a righteous husband who does the right things disisi undang undang agama & negeri at the same time. Only because it is all for the good of you and the kids and our family. Duniawi wa Ukhrawi, b.

Till then,

May Allah open up your mind and heart for you to see my worth. Before its all too late. May Allah make it easy for you too, b. May Allah help you out of any troubles you are having at present. May Allah protect you at all times. May Allah bring you back to the right path and only take you when you are ready. ;’(

P.S.:No offence, but I don’t think those ‘brothers’ of yours would want to help you bring the urinal when you need one. I don’t think they would want to change your diapers if you need to use one. I on the other hand would do it for you in a heartbeat. Not needing any time to think even.

I love you with all of my heart. Sincerely. Purely.

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terezisexbuttpyrope · 7 years

Text

fourth breadcrumb

“Wow he is a hard nut to crack.” Sarah commented, leaning back in her chair as she observed the alien across the street with small binoculars. The four had landed on Fafts a week ago, and though they had found their target almost on the first day, he had evaded or thwarted their efforts to squeeze any information out of him.

“Why are you so surprised?” Allura asked, raising an eyebrow. “He’s a black market dealer of quintessence. I figure it’ll take a lot more to get him to talk. I didn’t expect to get the information in such a straightforward method, honestly, I figured you’d use your phone to hack something.”

“Nah, according to Krisox he doesn’t keep his data on electronic equipment. It’s all paper or in his memory. Mostly in his memory.”

“Well that would have been nice to know a week ago.” Keith grumbling.

Sarah blinked, confused. “Did I not....?”

“No, you didn’t.” Allura said with a chuckle.

“Oh...sorry....”

“Got any other ideas beside strong-arming the info out of him?” Lance asked, returning with their drinks. “I get a feeling he isn’t likely to be broken by force.”

“Or persuasion.” Keith added.

“Bribes maybe?”

“We don’t have that kind of money.” Sarah said grimly.

“We’ll think of something.” Allura assured them.

“Oooh, hoverbikes!” Sarah cooed after they finished their meal and were walking back to their ships, lightly jogging over to where a dozen hoverbikes were parked.

“You ride?” Keith asked, surprised, joining her.

“Only recreationally.”

“Hey-Well, if it isn’t the curious humans.” a voice said from the adjacent shack.

“Holy shit Raz, how many businesses do you own?” Sarah asked the black market dealer they had attempted to interrogate for a week.

“More than you’ll ever learn about, now scram.”

“Hey, I was just looking! I used to race a lot, I miss it a little.”

“You used to race hoverbikes?” Lance asked incredulously.

“Believe it or not, Lance, I like to have fun sometimes.”

“Were you any good?” Raz asked gruffly.

Sarah narrowed her eyes. “Yea, I’d say I was decent.” she said cooly.

“I’d have to see it to believe it.” Keith said smugly. “Can’t beat me, that’s for sure.”

“I tell ya what-you two race, and I’ll give the winner one.”

“What?” Allura asked in utter disbelief. “You’ll just give us one, just like that?!”

“Well there’d be a few conditions...”

“Such as?”

“I’d need the winner to do a few races for me, nothing much.”

“I’m down.” Keith said, stretching.

“Keith, you are not down, this isn’t why we-” Allura began, before Sarah cut her off.

“The winner races for you and you give us the intel we asked for.”

“Depends how good the winner is.” Raz said with a dark chuckle. “Lost my last racer to rival teams. Been unable to participate in the underground racing ring since.”

“Okay. Deal.”

“Sarah!” Allura chastised. “You still haven’t fully healed....”

“I can do this, no problem.” Sarah said confidently. “When do we start?”

“Now’s good for me.” Raz said with a smirk.

“Sarah, I really wish you wouldn’t do this. Just over a week ago you could barely walk!” Allura insisted an hour later, after Sarah and Keith had suited up.

“I mean...sure, it’s reckless.” Sarah conceded. “But there’s a chance we might get the intel we need to move forward. And I’ve got this.”

Allura threw up her hands, exasperated. “Just be careful.” she grumbled as she stepped off to the side to join Lance, leaning against the wall and crossing her arms over her chest angrily.

“You sure about this?” Keith murmured as he got on his bike, helmet under his arm. “You still really haven’t recovered...”

“Look, let’s just do this, okay?” Sarah grumbled. It was true, it still hurt to even move around. But they had a chance to really move forward with their quest to find Shiro. She wasn’t about to let it pass them up just cause she had a weak human body. She smirked a little knowing they were in for the surprise of a lifetime.

“Okay, when the screen goes green, go.” Raz said on the opposite side of the bikes from Allura and Lance.

Sarah lifted her gaze to look at the screen, excited as she felt adrenaline flow through her. The screen turned yellow and she lowered her gaze, staring straight ahead; eye on the prize. Raz had said it was a rough-terrain course, which didn’t surprise her. Though most of the tracks on Stiea K2 only simulated rough terrain, she had done a few races with her sister on mostly uninhabited planets. It was really the only form of teenage rebellion she took part in.

When she saw the screen turn green out of her peripherals, she was off. All of her worries were wiped away as the wind blew her hair around wildly. She wouldn’t exactly call it her “element”, but it was damn near close; she lived for this feeling. The rush of the wind, the sheer speed of the bike....it was exhilarating.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Keith catching up to her. Thinking quickly, she used a passing rock formation to launch herself up and over him, causing him to gasp in surprise and lose ground. When she was back parallel to the ground she was laughing, leaning forward to push her bike faster and leaving him in a cloud of dust behind her.

“Holy shit, Sarah!” Keith called as he pulled his bike to a stop, a full thirty seconds after she had.

“I daresay I beat you.” she said with a giggle as he took off his helmet and ran over to join her.

“You are just full of surprises.” Raz said gruffly.

“You have no idea...” Allura murmured, smiling conspiratorially.

“So I get a bike. And answers. And in exchange, I race for you.” Sarah said, one hand on her hip as she held her helmet with the other.

“I want you both. You’re both faster than any other racer around these parts.”

“That wasn’t the dea-” Sarah began, before Keith cut her off.

“Fine, I’m game.”

“Good! First race is in a week.”

“First-give us one piece of information.” Sarah said, smoothly cutting off his exit.

Raz glared at her for a moment before he sighed in defeat. “Fine. I get quintessence from crystal caves. You can melt the crystals without losing the energy with a special machine. Now that's it until your first win.”

Sarah nodded and stepped aside, allowing him to leave.

“Sarah, I’m really not sure about this.” Allura said later that night as she changed her friends bandages.

“I know....I know...” Sarah murmured. “I’m...I know I’m being reckless. And I am a little scared. But...” she trailed off, shrugging. Luckily, Allura understood and nodded.

“I know how badly you want to find Shiro. I just wish you wouldn’t put your life on the line, you know he wouldn’t want you to.”

“At least I’m not destroying the universe.” Sarah quipped, earning her a small smile from Allura.

“These guys are really intimidating...” Allura commented the day of their first race. They were gathered in the starting area, Sarah and Keith two of a total of ten racers. Their competitors were rugged and imposing, a stark contrast to Sarah and Keith’s clean, youthful exteriors. They didn’t seem to pay them any mind, for which Sarah was grateful. It would make it all the better when she beat them.

“Yea...but I’ve got something they don’t.” Sarah said with a devilish smirk.

“Skill?” Lance asked.

“Experience?” Allura guessed.

“I’m a skinny little bitch.” Sarah answered with a laugh, causing her group to join her.

“I suppose that is helpful in something like this.”

“You bet your fine chocolate ass!” Sarah said happily, causing Lance to choke on his drink.

“Riders to their bikes!” the announcer called. In the flurry of movement, Lance and Allura barely managed to wish their friends good luck before they were hastily ushered off the track.

“Kinda funny that they put us at the front for handicap reasons.” Keith smirked, donning his helmet.

“They’ll learn their mistake prolly five seconds in.” Sarah quipped, adjusting her helmet. “Let’s show em up big time, yea?”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“I hope you’re famished, darling. Cause you’re about to eat my dust.” one of their opponents said from behind them.

“Oh, I am positively starving!” Sarah said giddily, making Keith laugh and the biker blink in confusion.

“When the screen goes green, go!” the announcer said, bringing all the riders to attention. Sarah and Keith bent forward, eager to start. They had kind of silently agreed that this would be a race between just the two of them; they’d easily leave the others behind.

She saw the screen turn yellow out of the corner of her eye, staring straight ahead at the track that laid before her. She and Keith had been allowed to practise on it a few times, so that there would be no surprises in an effort to make the race more “fair” for the newcomers. She felt devious knowing that they didn’t need the handicaps, but they were going to use them all the same.

The screen went green and she was off, bent low over her bike to lessen the drag. At the first turn, she tooks a split second to look behind her, laughing as she saw her and Keith’s lead. She saw him smirk and accelerate, pulling up beside her. “Oh no you don’t.” she murmured with a grin, pushing herself close against her bike.

The two were neck and neck most of the time, their competition a small blur behind them. “God, are they even trying?” Sarah called, causing Keith to smirk.

Allura and Lance ran up to them when they pulled across the finish line, relief clear on their face. The announcer declared Sarah the winner with Keith being an extremely close second. The group moved out of the way for the other racers, who pulled in fifteen seconds later, glaring at the two winners. “I don’t like the way they’re glaring at you two.” Allura murmured.

“Oh, they’ll get over it.” Sarah said casually, as Raz ran up to them excitedly.

“I don’t think they will, Sarah.”

“That was amazing!” Raz said as he got closer. “Keep racing like that and we’re sure to win the grand cup!”

“How many more races are there?” Keith asked coolly.

“Only four. The more races you win, the more information I’ll give you.”

Sarah sighed heavily. “Fine. Let’s get out of here and then you pay up.”

Over the course of a month, Sarah and Keith won two races for Raz. With each win, the resentment of the other riders grew and grew. Just as Allura had thought, they did not take kindly to the newcomers beating them over and over again. Sarah ignored it at first, but when one of the rival riders followed her back to her ship from an errand, she could no longer deny that their competitors were indeed dangerous and her and her team should proceed with caution. They took to moving their ships every other night, just to be safe. They didn’t know what the other racers were capable of.

They would soon find out.

“Ready for another win?” Sarah laughed with Keith as they walked to the starting area.

“Don’t be so cocky, Sarah.” Keith teased.

“Ha, look who’s talking!”

As they swung their legs over their hover bikes, Sarah noticed that the other racers were staring, but their eyes weren’t hostile. They looked like they....expected something. “Keith, I don’t like the way they’re looking at us.” she murmured uneasily.

“Yea...I don’t much like it either. Allura, you get that?”

“Yep.” Allura chimed in over their comm units. “I’ve got an eye on all the feeds spread out over the track. Doesn’t look like there’s anything out of the normal. Think they might have sabotaged the bikes?”

“No, they can’t have.” Sarah said assuredly. “Raz said the bikes are locked up tight as fuck just before races.”

“I mean there’s a couple weeks between races, where are they then?” Lance asked.

“With their respective owners. I have no idea where Raz keeps his so I presume his security is pretty tight.”

“Well stay alert, just in case.” Allura warned as the screen went yellow above them.

“Will do!” Sarah chirped.

The screen went green and she was off, speeding ahead like she usually did. Sarah tried to keep Allura’s warning in mind, but she always had so much fun. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Keith was also enjoying himself.

When she took the first turn, the tables turned.

“Sarah!” Keith cried out as she went spinning off the track into the rocky wilderness. She lost all sense of direction, focusing on holding onto the hover bike, not sure what else to do. Someone had definitely sabotaged her bike.

The vehicle hit a rock formation and she was launched, flying through the air before hitting something hard, blacking out as her body exploded in agony.

“Sarah!” Allura cried as she landed Darling close by the girl and Keith. “What happened?!”

“I don’t know!” Keith said, on edge. “She took the first turn and her bike went wildly off track and when I got here she was unconscious a-and she’s bleeding...”

“I told her she shouldn’t race, she hasn’t healed from the druids yet.” Allura said, her tone panicked as she picked Sarah up. “Keith, you take Lance and tell Raz what happened. I’m going to take Sarah somewhere safe, somewhere we haven’t been yet.”

“What can you do?” Lance asked as he and Keith hopped on the latter’s bike.

“I don’t know, I’ll do what I can.”

“Good luck!”

Allura nodded as she closed Darling’s hatch, taking off and activating the small craft’s invisibility. She flew to the other edge of town, landing behind a strange rock formation surrounded by dry brush. After she had Darling squared away, she knelt down next to Sarah, scared by the small girls laboured breathing. The princess began undressing her friend to attend to her bandages, her hands shaking slightly.

“I’ve told you about the machine I use and a brief history of quintessence mining. You didn’t win this one, so no information.” Raz said angrily, glaring at Keith who was in his face.

“Sarah almost died.” he said, his tone dangerous. “You didn’t tell us these racers might try and sabotage or hurt us. That wasn’t part of the fucking deal!”

“Not my problem! There’s one more race and you better win otherwise that's’ it.” Raz snapped his fingers and two hulking aliens came out from the back of his office and roughly grabbed Keith and Lanc, forcing them out.

“What do we do?” Lance asked as they made their way back to Krisox’s ship.

“I’m gonna have to do the last race alone.” Keith sighed. “I’m still faster than all the others so it shouldn’t be too hard.”

“I wonder why only Sarah’s bike was sabotaged and yours wasn’t.” Lance mused.

“Mine was.” Keith said grimly. “It just didn’t work. I checked the bikes after I found Sarah.”

“What?!”

“Don’t worry, I disabled it and hid my bike. It’ll be fine for the last race.”

“I think we should pull out.” Allura said after the Paladins met up with her. “It’s just not worth the risk anymore.”

“But we need more information!” Keith argued.

“I know, but it’s not worth risking your life for!”

“For all we know, Shiro’s somewhere in danger right now. The more information we get the faster we can track him down.”

“Lance?!” Allura said, turning to him abruptly.

“Uh...I think you have a point....but we do need the information.” he said thoughtfully. “Tell Raz that Keith will only race if we’re promised something big.”

Allura glared between them for a moment before sighing huffily. “Fine.”

“So that’s the new deal.” Lance finished the next day, informing Raz of the change. “You promise us a big piece of information, like your buyers’ names, or we walk and you don’t get anymore wins.”

Raz glared at him and Keith for a moment. “You mentioned the name I’ntayn once.” he said, throwing the two off guard.

“Uh-yea? So?”

“I’ll tell you where she is.”

“What?!” Keith almost shouted.

“You heard me. Win, and I will tell you where she is.” the alien leaned forward. “But you have to win, no matter what the others do to you or your friends or your bikes. Deal?”

Keith set his jaw and nodded. “Deal.”

“Where’s your little girl friend?” one of the other bikers said the morning just before the final race. Keith growled at his cocky grin, but otherwise ignored him.

“Patience yields focus...” he repeated to himself. He couldn’t risk losing. Not when Shiro was possibly at stake.

He swung himself up onto his bike, which he had triple checked for sabotage, and bent low, itching to go. He knew he could outrun them, if he could get around them; his starting position was in the very back.

The screen went green and everyone took off, leaving large dust clouds behind them. Keith deftly weaved between the other racers, ignoring yells of outrage. Some of them abruptly pulled in front of him, blocking his path, but he quickly slid to their other side and sped around them. It didn’t take him very long to reach the front, much to the other bikers’ dismay.

“You aren’t walking away from this!” the frontrunner yelled to Keith as he gained on him. The two had already left most of the others behind.

“Oh I think I will! I’m walking away with this win cause I have an advantage that you don’t.” Keith said with a smirk, pulling up next to him.

“And what’s that, human?”

“I’m a skinny little bitch!” Keith laughed, quoting Sarah as he rocketed ahead.

When Keith pulled over the finish line, he jumped off his bike, paying no mind to the cheering locals and the rival bikers coming in behind him. He made a beeline to Raz who was beside himself. “You did it! You won, thank you m’boy!”

“Where’s I’ntayn? I want an exact location and how to get there now.”

“Tsk tsk, you get right to it, don’t you? No time to celebrate?” Raz asked, before grumbling under Keith’s glare. “Fine. Follow me.”

“Okay here’s the coordinates, he said I’ntayn lives in some kind of temple with monks.” Keith said as he plugged the numbers into Darlings navigation computer.

“Okay, let’s get going. I don’t want to spend another second on this dreadful planet.” Allura said appreciatively.

“Is Sarah okay to travel...?” he asked, his voice dropping to a whisper as he glanced at the girl sleeping on the pull out bed.

“We don’t have much choice.” Allura answered grimly.

Keith nodded. “Let’s get out of here then.” he said, leaving and jogging over and into Krisox’s ship. Lance closed the back hatch behind him and they rose into the air, watching Darling move with them before taking off into space. Keith followed close behind, eager to get to I’ntayn and find out what she knows. We’re coming for you, Shiro. he thought. We will find you.

#my post #shirah

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