#102 is the only one that happens after she says that but its only 5 eps away so i think that's fair game

[terrorpenned]

97 / 4 / 12 / 87 / 102

#the kid has an immeasurable eyre / mrs. de winter complex going on. #but that's ok. that's what we're here for. at least me. #pain sometimes precedes pleasure，miss winters. ( victoria & roger ) #102 is the only one that happens after she says that but its only 5 eps away so i think that's fair game #it delights me that she imprints her gothic heroine-ness on roger when he didn't even commit the murder. #meanwhile barnabas is out here tearing out throats: a fine gentleman. my goodly pal (strictly pal) barnabas.

[sumi-sprite]

RIP Macchi - FIP Awareness

Yesterday around 4pm, I had to say goodbye to Macchiato "Macchi", my newest cat. She was barely a year old.

Over the past two weeks or so, she had been rapidly losing weight, but sported a potbelly. She was withrdrawn and exhausted, hid in my closet and slept all day, and was very warm to the touch. She only ate and drank periodically. I finally mangaed to get her in the same day I called. I initially thought - hoped - it was perhaps worms or a parasite since she was eating but not gaining weight. I hoped it was something treatable. I was even hoping it would be a tumor. Anything would have been better than FIP. The night prior, I had tried to look up her symptoms, and I ran across FIP numerous times.

No, can't be that, that happens to OTHER people. The odds are so low. It CAN'T be FIP. Famous last words.

The vet was very worried because all of her symptoms lined up. She had a fever of 105 F (normal temps for cats is roughly between 100 and 102 F). The vet said she was extremely sure it's FIP, and offered to run a blood test and test the fluid building up in Macchi's abdomen. There is no direct FIP test, but getting an idea of her hemoglobin levels would give us - give me - a slightly more solid confirmation. My nightmare was confirmed after it was shown that the hemoglobin in her blood were identical to that of the fluid in her abdomen, which is NOT normal.

"FIP is a serious disease caused by a feline coronavirus variant, though not the one that causes COVID-19. The virus will spread through a cat's body causing systemic inflammation. Up to 95% of cats diagnosed with FIP die without treatment."

It is caused by a mutation of the Coronovirus in cats, and generally afflicts kittens or young cats between three weeks to two years of age. Macchi may have been carrying the mutated variety for any length of time, possibly since we adopted her. It's thankfully not contagious after its mutation, so our other cat, Jade, is not at risk. It generally spreads through fecal contact, which, in a multi-cat home is nearly impossible to avoid if the cats share litterboxes.

There is no cure and no treatment.

The vet was tentative in explaining that there is an experimental drug in Europe that has shown incredible results. But here's the catch: It's not legal, it's not approved for commercial use, it's not available in the US, and tests plus administration would cost more than my university semester tuition. There have been people smuggling the drug to the US, and many cats have recovered beautifully - but only when FIP was caught in time.

I could never afford the treatment, and Macchi clearly did not have long to live. She would not make it to treatment after waiting so many weeks to get the drug to her. And besides that, the vet and I both agreed she was too far gone for it to help either way.

I took too long to get her help. I thought she was stressed from our move and being in a less than ideal living space. But even if I got her in sooner, I wouldn't have been able to even afford getting her help.

Wanna know what the odds are of a cat contracting FIP are? According to VCA: 

"The incidence of feline infectious peritonitis (FIP) disease is low (only 5 to 10% of infected cats and less than 1% of cats admitted to veterinary hospitals)." 

Yep. Roughly 5-10% of cats who caught Corona will experience the mutation, and less than 1% - 1 fucking percent - get to a pet hospital. Most cats develop the immunity to fight FIP and can go on perfectly healthy. Not Macchi though. Macchi was part of that 1%. One. Fucking. Percent.

This disease has NO treatment, NO cure, and it is VERY hard to diagnose. It is almost always 100% fatal in cases where a cat isn't able to fight off the mutated strain. It progresses rapidly and often without warning. Some cats may not display any symptoms for weeks, and then it all comes down full force all at once. My cat was perfectly fine up until two weeks ago, then she lost almost half her body weight, her muscles attrofied, and she lost the strength to fight it off. Her tests showed she was in the beginnings of multi organ failure. Less than two weeks, and she didn't have a snowballs chance in hell.

Please, PLEASE. For the love of god, keep an eye on your young cats and kittens - even your adult and senior cats. If any of them display symptoms, GET THEM TO A VET. There is a "dry" and "wet" variety to FIP. Macchi had the "wet" variety - where her intestines (primarily the stomach, large and small intenstines, etc) were shedding massive amounts of fluid. It can occure in the respiratory systems too. The "dry" variety presents as horrible multi or singular organ inflamation, with common locations being the liver, eyes, and even the brain.

Read up more information HERE

You're probably thinking that this can't happen to your cat. Like I said, Macchi just sadly fell into that 1% fatality. I thought that same thing, and yet here I am. Barely a year after losing my oldest cat, Max, and I had to say goodbye to another cat when she was barely a year old. Everything was fine, she was healthy and her usual, hamburger-faced self. Two weeks changed that. I had only a few minutes to come to terms with the fact that she was suffering, there was nothing I could do, and the most humane thing I could do was let her go. It takes roughly thirty seconds for euthenasia to stop a cat's heart.

Two weeks, a few minutes, thirty seconds. That's all she got.

I miss her, and I hope if just ONE person reads this, and it motivates them in someway to be more watchful of their cat; if I can make just one person aware, then I won't consider her loss meaningless. Maybe it's out of guilt. I don't know and I don't care, I just need people to know how serious this is and how quickly it can take a cat's life.

Please be safe, and keep your cats safe. Again, read up on FIP HERE

I love you and miss you, Macchi.

#FIP #FIP Awareness #feline infectious peritonitis #tw: animal death #tw: euthenasia mention #cats #animal diseases #RIP #animal loss #Shut Up Sumi #raise awareness

[forhim-aname]

HOW HAS HUMANITY DISSED AND DEFAMED JESUS THE MESSIAH FOR THE LAST THOUSAND YEARS? WHAT HAVE BEEN THE RESULTS? HOW CAN THIS BE REVERSED?

THE NAME OF THE LORD JESUS HAS BEEN DEFAMED BY DECRYING HIS ROLE AS RULER OF THE NATIONS IN HIS FIRST DOMINION KINGDOM which transpired during the first thousand years AD. At the beginning of Jesus' ministry, His gospel (good news for Israel) was that His First Dominion rule was "at hand". He chose 12 disciples and sent them out early-on, to preach in other cities because the harvest was too great for one man alone. He gave them power against unclean spirits, to cast them out and to heal all manner of sickness and all manner of disease, commanding them to go to the lost sheep of the house of Israel only, and preach, saying, "THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS AT HAND. Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out devils: freely ye have received, freely give." After studying Matthew 9:35-chapter 10, Jeremiah chapter 25, Zechariah chapters 12-14, Hebrews 1 & the Revelation 20:1-6 looking literally - how can we say that Christ's gospel of the 'Kingdom of Heaven at hand' failed to transpire during the Last Days of the Israelite which began with the birth of Jesus Christ?

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN (that we have forgotten God's desire to have a righteous nation and rule over the nations for a long, long time?) After His Majesty Jesus/Yhswh the Messiah's kingdom became like an old worn garment, then folded up and changed to another of Earth's realms in 840 AD - a sect rose up at Rome, Italy which scripture calls "Mystery Babylon the Great the Mother of Harlots and Abominations of the Earth". She is one of the women in the story of Zechariah 5:9-11. She wanted to control the masses, so while Earth's inhabitants were still few, following the change of the First Dominion Kingdom and Camp of the Saints, to another realm during the last Feast of Tabernacles; and devouring of Satan's huge army as sand of the sea - by committing genocide on everyone who could read and write.

RESULTS OF DOWNGRADING JESUS/YHSWH'S CHARACTER AS HAVING RULED THE NATIONS IN HIDING HIS KINGDOM AND ITS TECHNOLOGIES has been devastating to humanity! 1) There is no fear of God but by His calling, and individual hunger to search for Him. Legions of demons that were under the devil's operations against the saints before his imprisonment, then being cast into the Lake of Fire - are left on their own, to target and take posession of anyone who is not fully committed to serve their Saviour Jesus Christ Who is the same Lord over all the earth as He was for the Believers after being received up into a cloud and into heaven to sit at the Father's right hand. 2) Preachers are snared in holes of devious doctrines adopted because their first teachers weren't allowed to take prophecy literally, for fear of the inquisitions; and even tho the inquisitions have subsided - they are shut up in prison houses of fear and embarrassment to let their peers know they believe the Prophets; afraid to click a 'like' to any post that opens their eyes to the Truth.

HOW MAY THIS BE REVERSED? 1) By re studying the Bible without looking at a commentary; praying like Prophet David: "Open Thou mine eyes that I may behold wondrous things out of Thy Law." 2) By accepting the fact that we are living in the Last Days of the Gentile Age with heritages to possess which have lien desolate, as spoken by Isaiah in chapter 49. 3) by preaching the gospel of Jesus Christ - letting the world know He did rule over the nations for at least 770 years beginning in the Last Days of the Israelite in the year 70 AD. Then the inhabitants of the world will learn righteousness (Isaiah 26:9) and the world will be changed, Zion will be built (Psalm 102) and Jesus/Yhswh will come in His glory to gather all who have 'kept their garments', for Earth's Last Battle against evil forces. AlleluJAH!

[herelivesahobbit]

IPKKND Favorite Episodes

Episode 102

(In no particular order, just wanna gush about the episodes I love and why)

One of my favorite “low-key” episodes of IPK is the post-hospital bill episode. It marks the beginning of this sweet “truce” period between the Hospital Bill paying and Diwali heartbreak (two crucial Events), and I'm personally a fan of these "truce" tracks where Arnav and Khushi are all soft around each other.

Tbh nothing of great importance happens in this episode, in fact the next set of episodes include the fairy lights scene, mud in eye scene, Khushi’s signs from Devi Maiyya, and are more crucial to the development of the love story.

Nevertheless, I have such a soft spot for this episode. The entire vibe is so sweet and tentative and gentle! 

Its a great example of one of the things the show does really well, i.e. have a character such as Arnav, a man of few words, and yet communicate to us EXACTLY what he’s thinking and going through, via great writing and acting. I mean in this episode Arnav never says anything much to Khushi apart from asking about her father and his usual ASR-esque remarks, but he’s so desperate to know if she’s okay, to cheer her up, to make her happy. At this point, he’s very far from recognizing or naming what his feelings for her are, but that’s EXACTLY why I find his actions in this episode all the more beautiful. He asks after her. He not only doesn’t yell at or punish Khushi for breaking the vase, he takes the fall for her in front of Anjali as well. I mean that was so cute!!! It's totally impulsive and totally generous - the other side of the coin from his impulsive cruelties that we've witnessed so far.

Oh and the chamko detergent silver coin subterfuge!!!! He doesn’t get credit, he doesn’t get to hold it over her, he gets absolutely nothing out of it but to see Khushi smile, and thats why he does it - how could anything be more romantic? For me its one of the top 5 most romantic things ASR ever does.

This episode also lays the some of the foundations for Khushi's enduring love for Arnav. In the conversation with Payal, we see how for her, Arnav is beginning to represent a fantasy she can scarcely allow herself to accept she wants, much less chase. It's a girlish, immature fantasy at this point, that matures over time (through the Diwali heartbreak, Payash wedding and finally the contract marriage period) into a painful, bittersweet longing for a lover/husband she knows Arnav CAN be but isn't for her. Yet, even this girlish fantasy at this stage isn't a shallow crush, it's rooted deeply in her own traumas and the way she sees Arnav as the fulfillment of her every secret and desperate desire - someone to choose her for no reason but her own self, and protect her against every hurt, and shield her, someone who understands her pain and for whom she does not have to pretend to be happy or strong, someone for whom she is NOT a burden but a welcome responsibility. That's what she felt in that moment when Arnav out his hand on her head on the hospital - the absolute sincerity with which he communicated, with no words, exactly why he paid the bill - not as a benevolent favor, not an employers duty, but because he cares for her and wants to protect her. As much as Khushi is the perfect balm for Arnavs traumas, so is Arnav for Khushi's, a beautiful aspect of their love story that was lost somewhere later in the series along with Khushi's consistent character development.

And yes, includes yet another instance of Arnavs amusement at Khushi's antics - that amused half smile as he watches her run away. Soft!!!

#ipkknd #Ipkknd meta #Me.txt #Idk if I'll do more of these but I just had to talk about this one bc it's so underrated but it gives me ALL the feels

[antiloreolympus]

7 Anti LO Asks

1. Can I just say that the timeline of lore olympus is ridiculous because, you would think after 4 years, this story has taken place within months or years even, but nope.

Season 1 is episode 1-5 is one night, 6-28 is one day, 29-37, 38-49, 50-66, 67-69, 71-73 is a continuation of 50-66, 74-82, 83-94, 95-first half of 101, 102 is a day or two later, 103- little area of 104 is the same day during 74-82 and 104 skips 4 days, 104-105 is the same day and skips to Friday, 106-half of 111, other half of 111 is another day, 112 is it’s own day, 113-119 is a new day.

Season 2 happens in a couple days. Episodes 113-119 happen on the same day, 120-126, 127-maybe first half of 140, second half of 140-147, 148 is a single night, 149-half of 159, the other half of 159-172, and finally 173/174 is the start of a new day and the trail.

So let’s go off what info I given. Season 1 would be around 19-20 days while season 2 is just 7 days, however the season 1 finale and season 2 beginning it’s the same day. So if we count the days it could be around 27 days that all of the events of lore olympus happens. The sa, minthe and hades small relationship period, the eye removal, the news article situation, Persephone running away, her staying with hades, Demeter and Persephone being wanted, Daphne situation, everything happens in a month…

This is boggling my mind so hard.

(I took roughly an 2 hours doing the work and redoing it) 

2. Theory: all the flower nymphs looks like Persephone because Demeter wanted to use them as a way to hide her daughter from being seen since they all look the same (and Persephone gets mistaken as one a couple times)

3. i think the issue with LO too is both itself and the stans hype it up as this progressive work and im like??? where?? because theres nothing progressive to me about depicting a rich, heterosexual couple who everyone supports who get away with literal murder. like if it was an ancient setting it would make  a bit more sense, but theyre in a modern setting, so what exactly is progressive here? even the LGBT+ rep is just hypocritical lesbians and Hera cheating. Yay? Diversity win?

4. Idk if this was said before, but isn't it odd that both Persephone and Apollo chased a nymph to her death? Granted Daphne chose it while Minthe didn't, but it's weird to have the parallel.

5. i can get the idea the olympians dont like minthe bc maybe shes a nasty person, but they didnt even give her a chance just off their classism/racism (???) against nymphs, meanwhile they right away love persephone despite her doing the same or even worse things that minthe but its ok because she a born goddess so shes a better class/race than minthe to be in their group and be queen despite no qualities showing she'd be good for the role?? like rachel knows that makes them look awful, right? jfc

-----FP Spoilers-----

6. FP SPOILERS!

This is for anyone confused on the “months” claim hades said and are confused if the time skip is true, I would suggest going to episode 172. In that chapter, hermes goes to hades house to deliver news of not only Demeter capture, but also that the trail would begin the next day. Meaning episode 173,174, and the trail in general all happen the next day after 172, meaning there should be no timeskip at all.

Either Rachel forgot about hermes comment on the trail being the next day or she wants to do a stupid timeskip that contradicts itself. And if he is going by the tape, it was only one time thing and nothing more or less.

Also the pin Persephone wears in episode 173 was actually seen before in episode 144, when hades give it to Persephone as a he assures her he wants her and how “a kiss can be a kiss”. It was also hades pin on his outfit.

7. Hades is red flag either way. If he misspoke, Hades already thinks of Persephone as his wife despite not married to her. If he married her off screen and use it to escape punishment, he manipulated Persephone, who was willing to get the punishment, to marry him in a rush for his own selfish desires of not wanting her to get punished for her crimes and wanting to marry her.

From OP, not Anon: I don't think he manipulated Persephone but she's also very young. She just turned 20 like a week ago and jumping to marriage is a poor decision on her part and on Hades's end for just going with it, knowing she's so young and unexperienced.

If they get married to avoid consequences, that's a bad look on their marriage.

#anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

[zippityzap]

Sonic Tarot Card Project: explanations for character picks

Recently I completed a summer-long project where I created Sonic themed versions of the tarot major acana. I put a lot of research and thought into what characters to assign to which cards, and I wanted to explain my rationale behind each one! (Everything’s under the read more cut because this is a very long post!)

To start off, let me explain why I did this project in the first place. This summer I watched Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure for the first time, and in Part 3, Stardust Crusaders, the majority of the stand abilities are named after the tarot major arcana. Thanks to cultural osmosis I vaguely knew the meanings of a few of the cards and I realised that one of the characters suited his assigned card pretty well. I was curious if this matched anyone else and so once I finished watching that part, I did research on tarot and found that yeah, a lot of them do match! That got me interested in tarot and since I like combining things I’m interested in, I decided to make Sonic versions of the cards.

I do want to note that while Jojo did inspire this project in a lot of ways, I tried not to let my character picks be influenced by Stardust Crusader characters, although there did end up being some picks that did coincidentally happen to match nicely anyway. Also, I’m not gonna lie, ever since picking these card choices I’ve been highly tempted to draw Sonic as Polnareff.

Anyway, on to my explanations for character choices!

0: The Fool (Charmy Bee)

The Fool represents innocence, spontaneity and recklessness. I believe Charmy’s happy and carefree nature, along with the simple fact that he’s essentially just a little kid who likes to have fun makes him a great fit for this card

1: The Magician (Infinite)

The Magician represents creation and strength, but also manipulation and narcissism, a good match for Infinite and the powers of the phantom ruby. (I was also very pleased to notice that the traditional art for the card has an infinity symbol- everything lined up very well!)

The Rider Waite version of the card also depicts a sword, a wand, a cup and a pentacle; the suits of the minor arcana. I have attempted to depict these with various objects from the Sonic series, namely Infinite’s sword from the IDW Forces prequel comic, the sceptre of darkness from '06, a chaos emerald, and a ring respectively.

2: The High Priestess (Princess Elise)

The High Priestess represents secrets, repression, and the unknown, which I believe fits with Elise’s initial desire to control her emotions and her sadness. (Admittedly this is one of the looser character/card connections for this project, but my two other picks for this card I felt were better suited to different cards)

3: The Empress (Vanilla the Rabbit)

The Empress represents nurturing, fertility and childbirth, all traits that I believe make this card a good pick for a kind, caring mother like Vanilla

4: The Emperor (Dr Eggman)

A card fitting for the leader of the Eggman Empire! The Emperor represents authority, power, and tyranny, all traits Dr Robotnik desires, if not possesses in many continuities.

5: The Hierophant (Espio the Chameleon)

The Hierophant represents wisdom and tradition, and in both upright and reversed forms it has large connections to the concept of social conformity. Perhaps I’m drawing more from the various comic versions of Espio, but he comes across to me as someone who is hyper-aware about how he presents himself.

Fun fact: a hierophant is essentially another word for a religious leader, although I’ve never seen it used outside the context of tarot. I assume the religious connection is the reason why in the OST of the Jojo part 3 anime, Kakyoin’s theme is called Noble Pope.

6: The Lovers (Amy Rose)

The Lovers represents love, communication, and passion; and Amy is certainly a character who wears her heart on her sleeve! She’s a good example of a character who I feel fits a number of different cards, however there are no other characters who suited The Lovers quite as much as her.

7: The Chariot (Sonic the Hedgehog)

The Chariot represents journeys, wanderlust as well as the ambition and willpower to achieve your goals, which I believe is the perfect match for Sonic’s adventurous and heroic spirit. This was one of the first cards I decided on and it’s probably the one I’d defend my interpretation of the most.

If you’re wondering why there’s dark and hero chao in the artwork too, it’s because the original card art depicts the titular chariot being pulled by black and white sphinxes, and this is my way of calling back to that.

8: Strength (Maria Robotnik)

This card pick might seem unusual at first if you take the word ‘strength’ at face value, however considering the original card art depicts a maiden peacefully taming a lion, perhaps the Strength card represents inner strength, courage and determination rather than physical strength. These are traits that I believe Maria possesses.

9: The Hermit (Knuckles the Echidna)

The Hermit signifies awareness and independence but when reversed can mean isolation and resignation, traits that parallel well with Knuckles and his duty to be the protector of the Master Emerald

10: The Wheel of Fortune (Big the Cat)

The Wheel of Fortune represents fate, karma and luck! This is admittedly a bit of a cheeky dig at myself since I’m awful at the Big fishing levels in SA1 and mostly got through them through luck. But that’s not to say the card doesn’t apply to Big himself! His frequent cameos do have a bit of a fate/destiny vibe to them and in IDW Big is lucky enough to manage to avoid the metal virus for quite a long time.

11: Justice (Vector the Crocodile)

The meaning of the Justice cards is… pretty much what it says on the tin: fairness and clarity. Of course the Team Chaotix detective agency represents this as a whole, but that trait especially shines through with Vector himself. He may be a little money oriented, but doing what is morally right always takes priority.

12: The Hanged Man (Shadow the Hedgehog)

The thing about Shadow is that he’s a fairly complex character which means there are a number of cards in the Major Arcana that match him well, but I knew early on when tackling this project that I wanted to assign Shadow to The Hanged Man. This card represents change, release and sacrifice, which all align well with the character arc that Shadow goes through during the course of SA2 and beyond.

13: Death (Tikal the Echidna and Chaos)

Despite the morbid name of the card, (and the admittedly macabre scene I’ve depicted) the Death card is not an inherently negative card to draw. Yes, it can mean endings and grief, but it can also mean letting go and new beginnings. The story that Tikal and Chaos go through in SA1, their anguish and how they later find peace, is something that I think pairs well with this particular card.

Fun fact: this is the only card in this project that has two significant characters on it rather than just one. I felt I needed both of them to be on the card in order to fully represent its meaning

14: Temperance (Blaze the Cat)

The Temperance card signifies balance, harmony and patience, which matches Blaze’s very poised and graceful demeanour. Admittedly I had a little bit of trouble deciding on a card for Blaze since the High Priestess and the Hierophant are also good matches for her.

15: The Devil (Rouge the Bat)

The Devil card represents temptation, seduction, and materialism and well… look, Rouge is one of my favourite Sonic characters, I’d be one of the first people to tell you that there’s a lot more to her than what initially appears, she is so much more complex than just sex appeal and a gemstone obsession. However, I felt there was no other character that matched the traits of this specific card better than Rouge, and so my choice was decided by that.

16: The Tower (E-123 Omega)

The Tower card represents a number of things; disruption, disasters, sudden changes etc, however the trait that made me believe that Omega would be the best selection for the card was violence.

17: The Star (Miles ‘Tails’ Prower)

Tails’ character arcs normally centre around him gaining independence and self-confidence and learning to believe in himself. He is also largely characterised by his unyielding faith and trust in Sonic. These traits are the reason why I believe The Star card represents him well, as it symbolises hope and faith.

18: The Moon (Shade the Echidna)

The Moon card symbolises mysteries and the unknown, and when Shade is first introduced in Chronicles, she and the rest of the Nocturnus Clan are certainly presented as mysterious. The Moon can also represent misconception, which fits well with how Shade was initially unaware of the true nature of Ix’s plans.

19: The Sun (Cream the Rabbit)

The Sun, when drawn in an upright position, has a lot of positive meanings! Freedom, fun, happiness, good luck etc. Cream’s cheerful and optimistic disposition makes her a good match for this card

20: Judgement (E-102 Gamma)

The Judgement card symbolises liberation, awakening, redemption and second chances, all of which I believe represent Gamma and his character arc in SA1 well

21: The World (Metal Sonic)

In the upright position, The World card symbolises triumph, completion, strength and happiness while in reversed position can mean failure, anxiety, lack of self-confidence etc. I had both positioning of the card in mind when connecting it to Metal Sonic; he is devoted to the tasks given to him and is self-assured in his belief that he is the true/superior ‘sonic’ yet he repeatedly finds himself at the hands of failure. But he doesn’t let previous failures hold him back, thus starting the cycle anew. (Another connection to the World card as it also symbolises cycles)

#sonic the hedgehog #tarot cards #I'd be curious to hear if people agree/disagree with my choices

[danielxricciardo]

Prompts

1. "Hi, my ex just walked in. Would you hold my hand please?"

2. "I didn't expect to see you here."

3. "Have you seen this dog?"

4. “That mouth of yours, does it ever stop making noise”

5. “Seven minutes in heaven is for virgin teenagers”

6. “Slam that door one more time and I’ll shove my foot straight up your cute ass”

7. “Jesus! Knock next time would you”

8. “You have money go and get yourself a hoodie that’s not mine”

9. "I hate roses, I thought you knew"

10. "Do you think I am an angel? Ha"

11. "I wanted to sleep but someone decided to die"

12. "I can kill you right now, what are you talking about?"

13. "Hi, I am lost, can you come after me?"

14. "When I first saw you I wanted to date your best friend"

15. "I am so funny and you are just jealous"

16. "If I have to choose... no"

17. "Stop breathing like that!"

18. "I just did my nails"

19. "I'm the best driver în the world"

20. "Will you marry me?" "No"

21. "I think I broke my arm" "So?"

22. "I think I love you" "Thanks"

23. "My arms are lonely, don't you think?"

24. "Apparently we are dating"

25. “Well it’s kind of hard to move when you’re sitting on my lap”

26. "Those things you said yesterday, did you mean them?"

27. "If we elope, you think they'll kill us?"

28. "This is yours"

29. "You can’t just kiss me, laugh and then walk away."

30. "Are you using ass as a pillow?"

31." I find your lack of faith disturbing."

32. "And I took it personally"

33. "In here I am the boss"

34. "Oh, bite me!" "Where?"

35. "What will you do if we break up?"

36. "Where is my T-shit?"

37. "This is no time for sarcastic comments."  "There is always time for sarcastic comments."

38. "I’ll keep quiet, you won’t even know I’m here."

39. "The way you flirt is just awful"

40. "Don’t be fooled. I’m the epitome of mess."

41. " If you are on TV should I congratulate you?"

42. "And this, is why we can’t have nice things."

43. "That's what he said"

44. "I am scared of your boss"

45. "You should know, a lot of girls have a crush on me"

46. "Everyone is afraid of you"

47. "If I'm watching that movie one more time I'll lose my fucking mind!"

48. "I thought being on vacation will be stress free"

49. "My parents don't trust you"

50. "I don't think I should give my last name so easily"

51. “I really wish I could unsee that.”

52. “Who would’ve guessed we’d be sharing a room.”

53. “I feel like you have an unhealthy obsession with me.”

54. “Nah he’s fine, it’s the other one you really got to watch out for.”

55. “I have a suggestion.” “I’m not taking my clothes off so forget it.”

56. “You’re the genius, why don’t you tell me?”

57. “Have I ever told you your accent makes me swoon?” “Really?” “No.” He/she smiles. “ that’s why I’ve never told you.”

58. “I’m alive? How am I still alive?”

59. “You’re crazy! I love it!”

60. “Never have I ever is about to get a lot more interesting.”

61. “What did they do?” “Dude. They did the do.”

62. "You can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did!"

63. "Well this is awkward."

64. "Im too sober for this."

65. "Im pregnant." "Wall done, Virgin Mary!"

66. " I want to protect you."

67. "Kill that spider and maybe I'll forgive you"

68. "I have no one to go to the wedding"

69. "Don’t you dare touch _______!"

70. "I thought you were dead!"

71. "This is, without a doubt, the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in."

72. "Take care of you, please"

73. "If your best friend single?"

74. "Just remember, if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English."

75. "Why does everyone assume we're a couple?"

76. "Im craving something sweet" "Are you pregnant or something?"

77. " What is the magic word?" "I'll kill you în your sleep"

78. "When I see you my knees get weak"

79. "Finally you're single. Can I take you on a date?"

80. " So, I guess you don’t do after hours?"

81. "I know what I'm doing, I've watched two whole seasons of Grey's Anatomy."

82. "I can't believe I'm stuck here with you right now."

83. "Okay, this did not go as I planned it in the shower."

84. "I'm not going to sit around and watch you destroy yourself."

85. "You were my best friend"

86. "You did what?"

87. "Can you just pretend to love me for a second!"

88. "You are enough"

89. "Take the shirt off"

90. "Your nickname is bitch"

91. "What do you want to watch?" "You"

92. "How could you ask me that?"

93. "Your mouth does this thing and I can't resist it"

94. "Are you allowed to drink?"

95. "I said Im done, leave me alone!"

96. "Don’t raise your fucking voice at me”

97. “Yeah, I remember the drill”

98. “Tell me again, slowly this time, why that dog is in my bed.”

99. “Gave you so much, but it wasn’t enough.”

100. “You and me, we were destined to fall apart.”

101. “No, you don’t know who you are until somebody breaks your heart.”

102. “I want to tell you everything. The words I never got to say the first time around.”

103. “It’s better to feel pain, than nothing at all.”

Song lyrics prompts

1. “It’s the little things about us, that I love so much.”

2. “Last night I told you I loved you // woke up blamed it on the vodka”

3. “It’s a better place since you came along”

4. “You make me love the things I hate  “

5. Just a paper sheet and half a cigarette are left in my hand

6. Your faith walks on broken glass

7. "And can you teach me how to dance real slow?"

8. "I'll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe"

9. "One night, you won't forget the rest of your life"

10. "We only said goodbye with words"

11. "I'll try to give you love until the day you drop"

12. "I like the pretty boys with the bow tie"

13. "Lets get drunk forget what we did"

14. Your kisses lift me higher

15. When you're ready we can share the wine

16. "And if you don't love me now you will never love me again"

17. "Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?"

18. "When there's nothing to lose and there's nothing to prove"

19. She's the kind of girl who only asks you over when its raining, just to make you lie there catching water dripping from the ceiling.

20. Now I understand, you're a human, and you got to lie, you're a man

21. The good and the bad times: we've been through them all.

22. Now I ain't educated but I sure ain't stupid

23. I grew up in the shoes they told me I could fill

24. It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep

25. A lover would just complicate my plans

26. And in the morning, i’ll be with you, but it will be a different kind

27. My heart is yours, it’s you that i hold on to

28. And with one kiss, you inspired a fire of devotion that lasts for twenty years

29. I let go of my claim on you, it’s a free world

30. I’m in my bed, and you’re not here and there’s no one to blame, but the drink in my wandering hands

31. Cause you gave me peace and i wasted it, I’m here to admit that you were my medicine

32. Oh, dear diary, i met a boy, he made my doll heart light up with joy. Oh, dear diary, we fell apart, welcome to the life of electra heart

33. For you, I would cross the line, I would waste my time, I would lose my mind

34. Is it really me you're missing?

35. Remember that night?

36. How many times can I break till I shatter?

37. As long as I breathe, I’ll call you my home

38. "You wouldn't know love if it crushed your fucking chest."

39. "When we scream our lips don't make a sound."

40. "Please don't let me sink, wrap your arms around me and carry me home."

41. "This hasn't torn us apart so nothing ever will."

42. "A long time ago we believed that we were united."

43. "I miss the person that you were but I don't miss you."

44. "If home is where the heart is, why do I feel so fucking heartless?"

45. "I can't live, I can't breathe with or without you just go away."

46. "I'm not afraid to die, I'm afraid I'll survive and have to watch you suffer."

47. "I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away."

48. "I'm not like you I just fuck up."

49. "All because of you I believe in angels, not the kind with wings, no not the kind with halos. The kind that bring you home when home becomes a strange place."

50. "I just want to go to sleep and never wake up again."

51. “I wish people liked me more.”

52. “How could I ever love someone else?”

53. “I guess you’re getting everything you want.”

54. “She probably gives you butterflies.”

55. “I hope that you’re okay.”

56. “I defended you to all my friends.”

57. “I never cared about what they say, only care about me and you” 

58. “Either way i’m gonna lose, so i’m just gonna keep on loving you”

59. “You know i’m bad at communication, it’s the hardest thing for me to do”

60. “Iwas your lover, i was your friend, now I’m only just someone you call when it’s late enough to forget”

61. “It’s fucked up but it’s true that i love you like i do”

62. “Well we both had nights waking up in strangers beds but i don’t wanna, don't wanna, i don’t wanna give up yet”

63. “Tell me I’ve got it wrong somehow.”

64. “I’m begging for you to take my hand.”

65. “I can’t make it go away by making you the villain.”

66. “He feels like home.”

67. “I’d be breaking all my rules to see you.”

68. “But I know you’re not scared of anything at all.”

69. “When can I come back?”

70. “I’m ready to owe you anything”

71. “I’ll always look best in your head”

72. “I know you know it’s wrong, but I’m ready”

73. “All I ever want is breaking me apart.”

74. “Let's talk sweetly like all our love is false.”

75. “You put a fire in my heart, painted blood on my stars, gave me faith.”

76. “I wanna meet your girlfriend, she sounds nice.”

77. “How is kissing me so wrong?“

78. “Can’t you see that I’m already yours?”

79. “I’ve been losing track of the romantic sh*t I’m tryna say but basically I love you"

80. “I don’t wanna be your friend, I wanna kiss your lips, I wanna kiss you until I lose my breath”

81. “I apologize for all your tears, I wish I could be different but I’m still growing up into the one you can call your love” 

82. “I’m out of my head, of my heart, of my mind cause you can run but you can’t hide, I’m gonna make you mine”

83. "I never loved someone the way that I love you"

84. "It's the way that you know what I thought I knew, it's the beat that my heart skips when I'm with you"

85. "I hope she gettin' better sex, hope she ain't fakin' it like I did, babe"

86. “I know we’re young and people change and we may never feel the same”

87. “I can’t change the world, but maybe I’ll change your mind”

88. "You don't own me. Don't tie me down 'cause I'd never stay."

89. "Leave everything that is worth a single cent and just take me instead."

90. "And then I got you off your knees, put you right back on your feet, just so you can take advantage of me."

91. "Hey, I can't let you go with nobody. Cause I love you, baby."

92. "Tell me that it wasn't my fault and that I was enough for you."

93. "We were good at faking forever, I get it, whatever."

94. "Cause you had your chance and you blew it. Yeah, you ripped it up and you chewed it."

95. "Well, I'm too busy for your business. Go find a girl who wants to listen."

96. "Stop looking at me with those eyes, like I could disappear and you wouldn't care why."

97. "Oh, we could do whatever you want, but boy, don't go falling in love, you can't stay with me, all you'll ever have is one day with me"

98. "I pray the medication slow me down, but that shit doesn't work when you're around"

99. "Told her that I loved her once and now she'd kill for me"

100. "What the tell were we? Tell me we weren't just friends"

Who I write for

Formula 1

Daniel Ricciardo

Lewis Hamilton

Max Verstappen

Charles Leclerc

Esteban Ocon

Carlos Sainz

Lando Norris

Lance Stroll

Sebastian Vettel

Mick Schumacher

Pierre Gasly

George Russel

Football

Erling Haaland

Jadon Sancho

Giovanni Reyna

Jude Bellingham

Julian Brandt

Marco Reus

Roman Bürki

Emre Can

Mats Hummels

Leon Goretzka

Joshua Kimmich

Kai Havertz

Mason Mount

Christian Pulisici

Ben Chilwell

Gerard Pique 

João Félix

Ianis Hagi

Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain

Trent Alexander-Arnold

Virgil van Dijk

Jens Petter Hauge

Martin Ødegaard

Alexander Sørloth

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #imagine #fanfiction #formula 1 #football #my prompts #soccer #erling haaland #daniel ricciardo #max verstappen #charles leclerc #carlos sainz jr #lando norris #lance stroll #lewis hamilton #premier league #bundesliga #grand prix

[i-love-side-characters]

hot take for the aoas fandom but i don’t ship curaday. not bc i just don’t like the ship but bc i don’t like how faraday was curie’s previous mentor. idk... it just seems manipulative and predatory to me that they ended up together with the power dynamic so unbalanced.

hmm i definitely see where you're coming with that. and don't worry its fine that you don't ship them!!! that's perfectly acceptable!!!

i have to say a few things first on the predatory aspect, if that's alright. also disclaimer this is quite rambly, i'm sorry i'm just very tired.

additional notes:

important points/things i want to stress in bold

quotes are italicized

thunderhead + the toll quote used!!! not really spoilers, but careful if you haven't read books 2 and 3!!!

if you're not a coward here's my askbox

now in my opinion, there are a few things that might make it seem as though curaday is a very predatory relationship. one, the mentor/apprentice problem. two, the age gap. three, the essence of their romantic relationship. because you didn't state why you felt it was predatory, i'll adress those issues.

1) the nature of their relationship during the mentor years

the "original" curaday as such wasn't really a romantic relationship. there was no hint of the relationship between the two while faraday was mentoring curie. at the time when their relationship was only mentor/apprentice and indeed adult/minor, there were no requited feelings from faraday.

"....then tore [the journal entry] out the next day, when i broke down and confessed my love with eyeball-rolling melodrama. [...] [scythe faraday], on the other hand, was a gentleman [...] and let me down as easily as he could." ― scythe curie, (page 347, scythe)

just to be thorough, here are several definitions of "let down." all links in sources.

convey bad or disappointing news in a considerate way, so as to spare the person's self-respect. ― idioms free dictionary

to try to give someone bad news in a way that does not upset them too much. ― macmillan dictionary

an unrelated expression is let someone down easy. this phrase refers to breaking up with someone in a relationship in such a way that they are not devastated of overly sad. ― writing explained

so it's clearly implied that faraday said no to her. after curie confesses her feelings, she describes what happen after that.

"i lived in [scythe faraday's] house, and remained his apprentice, for two more awkward months." ― scythe curie (page 347, scythe)

note that there is no mention of there ever being a romantic relationship between the two scythes during the remainder of the mentorship. this shows that no adult/minor predatory behaviour had occurred between the two scythes.

just to add on, some thoughts from my friend ref. ( @jam-is-my-food )

"if their romance took place when or anytime around when curie was his apprentice, yes. absolutely that would be a tilted power dynamic and uncomfortable and Not Good."

this, as well as the quotes, removes the "predatory" aspect of your concern. but that's just my opinion!!! you can still believe that is an unhealthy and wrong relationship. but personally i don't think the mentor/apprentice concern is a factor, since the romantic aspect took place much later.

2) the age gap during the years of their romantic relationship

there is a 5 year age gap between the two scythes. according to the wiki, at the start of scythe, curie is 219 years old, and faraday is 224. during scythe curie's explanation of her crush on faraday, she pinpoints their exact ages.

"i was seventeen and full of righteous indignation at a world that was still heaving in the throes of transformation." ― scythe curie (page 345, scythe)

"i was seventeen, remember. childish in so many ways. i thought myself in love." ― scythe curie (page 346, scythe)

"but at twenty-two, [scythe faraday] was just as inexperienced in such matters as i was." ― scythe curie, (page 346, scythe)

the five year age gap during the mentorship would have made it an adult/minor relationship, but as they grew older that simply isn't the case.

"then, nearly fifty years later, when we both had turned our first corner and were seeing the world through youthful eyes once more―but this time with the wisdom of age on our side―we became lovers." ― scythe curie (page 347, scythe)

they became romantically involved until fifty years had passed. which would put curie at around 67, and faraday at around 72. curie even outright says that they had "the wisdom of age on [their] side." this shows that curie believed that both parties were mature in their starting of a romantic connection.

here is some more input from ref. ( @/jam-is-my-food )

"and, adding on to [the earlier statement], if faraday was the one who had liked marie when she was his apprentice. even if a lot of years had passed, that would i think still make it inherently predatory and yikes.

but the thing is, that's not what happened. all that happened when she apprenticed for him was that marie had a crush on michael.

and he turned her down. because she was a kid. and that's the end of it."

this, i would say, addresses the general complaint of the age gap between the two. most often people believe that because faraday apprenticed curie that he was a lot older but that's not true. the gap is only 5 years. now that absolutely does not make their relationship "not predatory", but it does show that both parties were mature in their decisions.

3) after their romantic relationship + friendship

now this part is less technical than the others. this is mostly my opinions. but just to start off, i want to look at their relationship after the 7 deaths and 70 years.

your feeling of their relationship is that it is "manipulative and predatory". now i've never been in an unhealthy relationship before, but i don't believe this is one (please correct me if i'm wrong! i am not speaking from experience here and could easily make a mistake!).

out of everything, their treatment of one another after the romantic relationship stands out to me the most. personally if their romantic had been unhealthy in that sense, i don't believe they would have stayed friends as they did.

i had written an essay a while about curie and faraday together. if you could read it that would be great! however i'm linking my friend nisha's ( @genyyasafin ) reblog of it, as she adds in a small bit at the end about how faraday humanizes curie. [ here ] is the link.

as i was saying, i don't think this is a predatory and manipulative relationship simply from the way they act afterwards. they are described as old friends constantly, and that friendship seems natural, to me at least. now you could be saying that this is a manipulative relationship and neither of them notice, but i don't think that's true.

“seven deaths, and seventy years later, many things had changed. we remained old friends after that, but nothing more.” ― scythe curie (page 348, scythe)

"i have observed the rise and fall of the romantic relationship between [scythe curie and scythe faraday], as well as the many years of devoted friendship that has followed." ― the thunderhead (page 383, thunderhead)

these two show that even the thunderhead, which is an incredibly knowledgeable force, does not seem to be troubled by their relationship.

not to mention this quote:

"other scythes―the ones i'm friendly with―will call me marie." ― scythe curie (page 235, scythe)

and through that quote it is shown that both curie and faraday are comfortable around each other. this isn't every instance in the books, but the ones i found quickly.

"marie―scythe curie that is―...." ― scythe faraday (page 371, scythe)

"and you, marie." ― scythe faraday (page 383, thunderhead)

"where are you my dear marie?" ― (page 102, the toll)

i didn't add in any quotes where its the reverse and she calls him michael, because he never mentioned his policy for first-name-basis, but this shows how comfortable curie is around faraday. not to mention it is implied that curie and faraday talk often, as curie knows about an event that only faraday, citra, and rowan know about.

"didn't you already attend a family wedding?"

citra wondered how scythe curie knew that, but wasn't about to let herself be derailed. ― scythe curie - dialogue, citra terranova - narraration (page 231, scythe)

the comfort in which they speak to and reference one another suggests to me, at least, that there is not a manipulative intent or feeling in the relationship.

4) conclusion i suppose

if you read all the way here, then i applaud you for your dedication and i thank you very much. that seriously means so much to me.

to anon: this essay was a whole 1,429 words. i am so sorry. however i do disagree with your opinion but i hope i've voiced mine in a somewhat coherent manner. thank you so much for reading all this way!!!

5) sources:

scythe curie wiki

scythe faraday wiki

arc of a scythe - book one: scythe

arc of a scythe - book two: thunderhead

arc of a scythe - book three: the toll

let down - idioms by the free dictionary

let down - macmillan dictionary

let down - writing explained

#not main content #arc of a scythe #aoas #mine #scythe curie #hs curie #scythe faraday #hs faraday #curaday #otp: is it true you died seven deaths for her? #otp: and her for me #long post #im very sorry anon this is quite long #i just found your opinion very interesting #i hope i didnt come off as rude that wasn't my intent #also i know its a mess im sorry #its not coherent at all

[lazyyypup]

my Year in Review but i only made this account in October so its my "Three months in review" and its also long because i make long text posts oops

I posted 131 times in 2021

29 posts created (22%)

102 posts reblogged (78%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 3.5 posts.

I added 53 tags in 2021

#merlin - 11 posts

#merthur - 7 posts

#i will never get over this - 6 posts

#arthur pendragon - 5 posts

#merlin bbc - 5 posts

#merlin emrys - 4 posts

#bbc merlin - 4 posts

#merlin au - 4 posts

#merlin fanfic - 4 posts

#arthur is in love - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#me showing him an article about a guy who drown (how happened to be a bigger man and had a giant white beard) and telling him it was santa

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

HOLY SHIT GUYS HOLY FUCKING SHIT

IM GOING- IM SO EXCITED- I GOT A VIP TICKET AND IM SO FUCKING EXCITED WHAT THE HELL 

EEF HERE I COME

6 notes • Posted 2021-11-22 19:00:09 GMT

#4

The Royal Family of Camelot

"It consists of King Arthur and his Queen Guinevere. The Knights of the Round Table, Sir Leon, Sir Lancelot, Sir Gwaine, Sir Elyan, and Sir Percival. And Merlin.

They’d already died."

I FINALLY HAVE POSTED A FANFIC

Its just a simple oneshot, but you'll hate it none-the-less.

You can read it here on AO3 !!!

6 notes • Posted 2021-12-03 02:38:26 GMT

#3

I kinda wanna write abunch of oneshots??? So Idk??? suggest shit maybe for me???

10 notes • Posted 2021-10-12 22:12:59 GMT

#2

MERTHUR FIC IDEA

(i’m actually in the process of writing this one haHA so it will be a fic soon)

While on a wild chase of a hunt, Merlin and Arthur get lost. 

After many many complaints from Merlin, at least three (3) arguments, and an angry horse, Arthur finally decides that they should stop for the night and try to backtrack in the morning. 

“Maybe some rest will help me find our way back..”

And Merlin just stares at him in disbelief because ‘Didn’t I just say that not too long ago?!’

So he leads them back to a small clearing that he saw a little ways back.

And they stop,

In the middle of the woods,

(That neither of them know very well)

In the middle of Autumn.

“Don’t let anything kill me while I rest, I switch with you in a couple hours.” Arthur tells him, “And I swear-”   Now glaring at Merlin, “If you let that fire die, I’ll leave you in these woods to fend for yourself.” 

Well, that’s that. Merlin has no choice but to keep watch. Leave me to fend for myself when you can’t even get dressed on your own.. He would think harshly and poking needlessly at the fire.

Several hours later, Arthur would wake, freezing half-to-death, to find Merlin sleeping next to a pile of burnt wood.

Arthur, annoyed by his manservant, goes to wake him up (by unkindly shoving him) when he hears the young boy mumbling in his sleep.

Arthur, being the nosy prat that he is, listens to his sleep-talk. Hearing things that Merlin wouldn’t dare say in front of the man. 

Things about his father (’who just died recently?’ Arthur would think), and a young girl, named Freya, that he’d began to love but never got to express it because she was taken from him as well.

Merlin would be in and out, words trailing off before he’d continue again.

Then something would catch Arthur’s attention,

“Magic.. Kilgharrah...”

“Father- it worked...”

25 notes • Posted 2021-10-22 02:45:48 GMT

#1

Merlin AU where Arthur wants to marry Merlin-

But obviously his father would never let him, so he plans a secret marriage.

Where he goes to Gaius’ chambers, while Merlin is off doing his own thing, and asks Gaius for his blessing. Because he remembers Merlin said to him once that “He’s like the father I never got to have”. 

And they sit together for a long while talking, until Merlin wanders inside, looking at them confused because ‘Why do they look so serious? Is Arthur okay?’

Where he goes to the royal seamstress to request a personal item, avoiding every question she asks, “Who’s it for?” "Why can't King Uther know about this?" And when she's done, he slides a gold coin to pay for her silence.

Where Arthur struggles to pack a picnic, but as stubborn as he is, he refused help. Until Sir Leon and Gwen show up saying “Sire, no offense, but this is nothing to stress about- Please let us help!”  But still the prince’s pride was too big to just give up, because “How am I to provide and be a good husband, if I can’t simply fill a basket with food!”  And Leon lets him shout out and vent all his worries about how this ‘can and will go wrong‘, as Gwen quietly packs the picnic. 

And after it all he sheepishly takes the basket, murmuring his apologies and thanks, before leaving to prep the horses.

Where he and Merlin ride out, the ride at first riddled with questions of “Where are we going?” “Why’ve you been avoiding me?” “Arthur, is everything okay?”

Of course everything is okay. This is going to be a beautiful story we can tell our children.

Where they finally arrive to a fair meadow that Arthur found weeks ago. The perfect spot. Where the sun would warm their skin just right, and Merlins eyes would look like the slow ocean waves that he loved so much.

And they would lay out on the blanket Gwen packed, and talk about the recent events that occurred, make jokes about Gwaine and Percival being hopelessly in love, and munch on the few snacks that were brought.

Where eventually they trail off and stop talking. Taking in the sounds of nature, basking in each others presence. Arthur stealing glances at Merlin when he isn’t looking, trying to work up the courage to just do it already.

Where he would stand up, extending a hand to Merlin to pull him to his feet. Merlin takes the hand, and once stable, quickly brushes of the invisible dirt off the front of his trousers. 

Where Arthur would say “Merlin..”, while reaching into his pocket to pull out, what looked to be, a handful of fabric.

And Merlin would look at him confused, thinking ‘What is he doing? What is that?’

Arthur would rub the back of his neck and squeeze his eyes shut for a moment, steeling himself. A flash of concern etches across Merlins face, Arthur was nervous. Arthur never showed anyone he was nervous. 

But then Arthur would open his eyes and stare into Merlin’s deep blues, lowering himself onto one knee and grabbing his hand.

“I know this might be strange, I know I’ve treated you unfairly at times. But I want you to know that I, Arthur Pendragon, am absolutely in love with you...” He would bring up the cloth, and only then would Merlin recognize it. A neckerchief. Made out of the same fabric as Arthur’s cape. A deep, vibrant, Pendragon Red, neckerchief.

“It’s not a ring, but I hope you accept it just the same..” 

Merlin would be baffled, taking the soft, silky fabric into his hands and rubbing it between his fingers. A token of his love. He would stare at it, tears brimming his eyes, love flooding his heart. Arthur is in love with me. He was ecstatic, but what Arthur said next, well... Merlin didn’t have a word to describe the feeling.

“Merlin, Will you marry me?”

96 notes • Posted 2021-10-10 17:12:28 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[backslashdelta]

Glee Soundtrack Rating Project Results: admirabletragedy

@admirabletragedy

Favourite character: Kurt Hummel

Least favourite character: Dave Karofski

Favourite season: Season 2

Least favourite season: Season 4

Mean song rating: 7.71

Mean song rating for favourite character's songs: 8.24

Mean song rating for favourite character's solos: 8.83

Mean song rating season 1: 5.94

Mean song rating season 2: 7.79

Mean song rating season 3: 7.88

Mean song rating season 4: 8.85

Mean song rating season 5: 8.65

Mean song rating season 6: 9.29

Songs rated: 146

[ID: A bar chart titled Number of songs assigned each rating by admirabletragedy, illustrating the number of times each score was assigned to a song by admirabletragedy. 10 was assigned 63 times, 9 was assigned 6 times, 8 was assigned 20 times, 7 was assigned 15 times, 6 was assigned 12 times, 5 was assigned 12 times, 4 was assigned 5 times, 3 was assigned 4 times, 2 was assigned 3 times, 1 was assigned 6 times, and 556 songs were not rated.]

About the Project | Results Masterpost

Ranking:

1. (10) - S1x03 - Bust Your Windows

2. (10) - S1x06 - It's My Life/Confessions Part II

3. (10) - S1x15 - 4 Minutes

4. (10) - S1x18 - Rose's Turn

5. (10) - S2x03 - I Want to Hold Your Hand

6. (10) - S2x04 - Happy Days Are Here Again/Get Happy

7. (10) - S2x04 - River Deep, Mountain High

8. (10) - S2x06 - Teenage Dream

9. (10) - S2x06 - Stop! In the Name of Love/Free Your Mind

10. (10) - S2x06 - Start Me Up/Livin' on a Prayer

11. (10) - S2x08 - Just the Way You Are

12. (10) - S2x09 - Dog Days Are Over

13. (10) - S2x09 - Valerie

14. (10) - S2x10 - Baby, It's Cold Outside

15. (10) - S2x11 - Thriller/Heads Will Roll

16. (10) - S2x11 - Bills, Bills, Bills

17. (10) - S2x12 - Silly Love Songs

18. (10) - S2x13 - Somebody to Love

19. (10) - S2x16 - Blackbird

20. (10) - S2x18 - Somewhere Only We Know

21. (10) - S2x18 - Born This Way

22. (10) - S2x18 - I Feel Pretty/Unpretty

23. (10) - S2x20 - Dancing Queen

24. (10) - S2x21 - Pure Imagination

25. (10) - S2x21 - Back to Black

26. (10) - S2x22 - For Good

27. (10) - S3x05 - One Hand, One Heart

28. (10) - S3x06 - Rumour Has It/Someone Like You

29. (10) - S3x07 - Perfect

30. (10) - S3x11 - Smooth Criminal

31. (10) - S3x14 - Cough Syrup

32. (10) - S3x17 - I Have Nothing

33. (10) - S3x21 - Paradise By the Dashboard Light

34. (10) - S3x21 - We Are the Champions

35. (10) - S3x22 - In My Life

36. (10) - S4x01 - Chasing Pavements

37. (10) - S4x01 - New York State of Mind

38. (10) - S4x04 - Don't Speak

39. (10) - S4x04 - The Scientist

40. (10) - S4x05 - Hopelessly Devoted to You

41. (10) - S4x06 - Beauty School Dropout

42. (10) - S4x06 - There Are Worse Things I Could Do

43. (10) - S4x09 - O Holy Night

44. (10) - S4x10 - White Christmas

45. (10) - S4x10 - The First Noel

46. (10) - S4x13 - Bring Him Home

47. (10) - S4x15 - Come What May

48. (10) - S5x01 - Help!

49. (10) - S5x01 - All You Need Is Love

50. (10) - S5x02 - Let It Be

51. (10) - S5x03 - I'll Stand By You

52. (10) - S5x03 - Make You Feel My Love

53. (10) - S5x03 - If I Die Young

54. (10) - S5x06 - Just the Way You Are

55. (10) - S5x06 - Movin' Out (Anthony's Song)

56. (10) - S5x08 - Away in a Manger

57. (10) - S5x12 - Valerie

58. (10) - S6x02 - Take On Me

59. (10) - S6x05 - It Must Have Been Love

60. (10) - S6x06 - Arthur's Theme

61. (10) - S6x08 - Hey Ya!

62. (10) - S6x08 - Our Day Will Come

63. (10) - S6x08 - At Last

64. (9) - S1x07 - Hate On Me

65. (9) - S2x11 - She's Not There

66. (9) - S2x22 - I Love New York/New York, New York

67. (9) - S3x05 - America

68. (9) - S3x15 - Fighter

69. (9) - S5x18 - Story of My Life

70. (8) - S1x01 - Respect

71. (8) - S1x01 - Don't Stop Believing (Pilot)

72. (8) - S1x01 - Rehab

73. (8) - S1x17 - Total Eclipse of the Heart

74. (8) - S1x20 - Bad Romance

75. (8) - S1x22 - Bohemian Rhapsody

76. (8) - S1x22 - Don't Stop Believing (Regionals)

77. (8) - S2x18 - As If We Never Said Goodbye

78. (8) - S3x01 - You Can't Stop the Beat

79. (8) - S3x03 - Run the World (Girls)

80. (8) - S3x08 - Man in the Mirror

81. (8) - S3x08 - ABC

82. (8) - S4x01 - It's Time

83. (8) - S4x01 - Americano/Dance Again

84. (8) - S4x04 - Teenage Dream (Acoustic)

85. (8) - S4x07 - Some Nights

86. (8) - S5x03 - Seasons of Love

87. (8) - S5x05 - If I Were a Boy

88. (8) - S5x10 - Don't You (Forget About Me)

89. (8) - S5x20 - American Boy

90. (7) - S1x01 - On My Own

91. (7) - S1x05 - Somebody to Love

92. (7) - S1x10 - I'll Stand By You

93. (7) - S1x13 - And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going

94. (7) - S2x09 - Don't Cry for Me Argentina

95. (7) - S2x09 - (I've Had) The Time of My Life

96. (7) - S2x14 - Don't You Want Me

97. (7) - S2x14 - Tik Tok

98. (7) - S2x15 - Animal

99. (7) - S2x16 - Candles

100. (7) - S3x09 - Let It Snow

101. (7) - S3x09 - Blue Christmas

102. (7) - S3x18 - Not the Boy Next Door

103. (7) - S4x07 - Holding Out for a Hero

104. (7) - S4x11 - I Don't Know How to Love Him

105. (6) - S1x01 - Leaving On a Jet Plane

106. (6) - S1x12 - Jump

107. (6) - S2x04 - Lucky

108. (6) - S2x08 - Marry You

109. (6) - S2x10 - The Most Wonderful Day of the Year

110. (6) - S3x08 - We Are Young

111. (6) - S3x11 - Bad

112. (6) - S3x13 - Love Shack

113. (6) - S3x17 - It's Not Right But It's Okay

114. (6) - S3x17 - I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)

115. (6) - S3x18 - Cell Block Tango

116. (6) - S4x06 - You're the One That I Want

117. (5) - S1x01 - You're the One That I Want (ver. 1)

118. (5) - S1x01 - Mr. Cellophane

119. (5) - S1x01 - I Kissed a Girl

120. (5) - S1x07 - Keep Holding On

121. (5) - S1x08 - Sweet Caroline

122. (5) - S1x13 - Don't Rain on My Parade

123. (5) - S2x09 - Hey, Soul Sister

124. (5) - S2x16 - Raise Your Glass

125. (5) - S3x04 - Last Friday Night

126. (5) - S4x05 - Everybody Talks

127. (5) - S5x12 - Defying Gravity

128. (5) - S6x07 - Time After Time

129. (4) - S1x15 - Vogue

130. (4) - S1x21 - Give Up the Funk

131. (4) - S2x01 - Billionaire

132. (4) - S2x07 - Forget You

133. (4) - S2x16 - Misery

134. (3) - S1x01 - Can't Fight This Feeling

135. (3) - S1x09 - Defying Gravity

136. (3) - S2x03 - Only the Good Die Young

137. (3) - S3x05 - Uptown Girl

138. (2) - S1x01 - Sit Down You're Rockin the Boat

139. (2) - S1x02 - Push It

140. (2) - S2x02 - Toxic

141. (1) - S1x02 - Gold Digger

142. (1) - S1x07 - No Air

143. (1) - S1x12 - Smile (Lily Allen)

144. (1) - S2x02 - The Only Exception

145. (1) - S2x15 - Landslide

146. (1) - S5x07 - The Fox

147. (NA) - S1x02 - I Say a Little Prayer

148. (NA) - S1x02 - Take a Bow

149. (NA) - S1x03 - Mercy

150. (NA) - S1x03 - I Wanna Sex You Up

151. (NA) - S1x04 - Taking Chances

152. (NA) - S1x04 - Tonight

153. (NA) - S1x05 - Last Name

154. (NA) - S1x05 - Alone

155. (NA) - S1x05 - Cabaret

156. (NA) - S1x05 - Maybe This Time

157. (NA) - S1x06 - Halo/Walking On Sunshine

158. (NA) - S1x07 - Ride Wit Me

159. (NA) - S1x07 - You Keep Me Hanging On

160. (NA) - S1x08 - I Could Have Danced All Night

161. (NA) - S1x08 - Bust A Move

162. (NA) - S1x08 - Thong Song

163. (NA) - S1x08 - What A Girl Wants

164. (NA) - S1x09 - Dancing With Myself

165. (NA) - S1x09 - Proud Mary

166. (NA) - S1x10 - Lean On Me

167. (NA) - S1x10 - (You're Having My Baby)

168. (NA) - S1x10 - Endless Love

169. (NA) - S1x10 - Don't Stand So Close to Me/Young Girl

170. (NA) - S1x10 - Crush

171. (NA) - S1x11 - Hair/Crazy In Love

172. (NA) - S1x11 - Imagine

173. (NA) - S1x11 - Bootylicious

174. (NA) - S1x11 - Papa Don't Preach

175. (NA) - S1x11 - True Colors

176. (NA) - S1x11 - Don't Make Me Over

177. (NA) - S1x12 - Smile (Charlie Chaplin)

178. (NA) - S1x13 - You Can't Always Get What You Want

179. (NA) - S1x13 - My Life Would Suck Without You

180. (NA) - S1x14 - Hello, I Love You

181. (NA) - S1x14 - Highway to Hell

182. (NA) - S1x14 - Gives You Hell

183. (NA) - S1x14 - Hello, Goodbye

184. (NA) - S1x14 - Hello

185. (NA) - S1x14 - Hello Twelve, Hello Thirteen, Hello Love

186. (NA) - S1x15 - What It Feels Like for a Girl

187. (NA) - S1x15 - Like a Virgin

188. (NA) - S1x15 - Express Yourself

189. (NA) - S1x15 - Like a Prayer

190. (NA) - S1x15 - Borderline/Open Your Heart

191. (NA) - S1x15 - Burning Up

192. (NA) - S1x16 - Home

193. (NA) - S1x16 - One Less Bell to Answer/A House Is Not a Home

194. (NA) - S1x16 - Fire

195. (NA) - S1x16 - A House Is Not a Home

196. (NA) - S1x16 - Beautiful

197. (NA) - S1x17 - U Can't Touch This

198. (NA) - S1x17 - Physical

199. (NA) - S1x17 - Run Joey Run

200. (NA) - S1x17 - Ice Ice Baby

201. (NA) - S1x18 - Jessie's Girl

202. (NA) - S1x18 - Pink Houses

203. (NA) - S1x18 - The Boy Is Mine

204. (NA) - S1x18 - Lady Is a Tramp

205. (NA) - S1x18 - One

206. (NA) - S1x19 - Safety Dance

207. (NA) - S1x19 - Dream a Little Dream

208. (NA) - S1x19 - Dream On

209. (NA) - S1x19 - I Dreamed a Dream

210. (NA) - S1x20 - Shout It Out Loud

211. (NA) - S1x20 - Beth

212. (NA) - S1x20 - Poker Face

213. (NA) - S1x20 - Funny Girl

214. (NA) - S1x21 - Another One Bites the Dust

215. (NA) - S1x21 - Loser

216. (NA) - S1x21 - Good Vibrations

217. (NA) - S1x21 - It's a Man's Man's Man's World

218. (NA) - S1x21 - Tell Me Something Good

219. (NA) - S1x22 - To Sir, With Love

220. (NA) - S1x22 - Faithfully

221. (NA) - S1x22 - Any Way You Want It/Lovin' Touchin' Squeezin'

222. (NA) - S1x22 - Over the Rainbow

223. (NA) - S2x01 - Empire State of Mind

224. (NA) - S2x01 - What I Did for Love

225. (NA) - S2x01 - Telephone

226. (NA) - S2x01 - Listen

227. (NA) - S2x01 - Every Rose Has Its Thorn

228. (NA) - S2x01 - Getting to Know You

229. (NA) - S2x02 - Stronger

230. (NA) - S2x02 - I'm a Slave 4 U

231. (NA) - S2x02 - Me Against the Music

232. (NA) - S2x02 - Baby One More Time

233. (NA) - S2x03 - Losing My Religion

234. (NA) - S2x03 - I Look to You

235. (NA) - S2x03 - Bridge Over Troubled Water

236. (NA) - S2x03 - Papa, Can You Hear Me?

237. (NA) - S2x03 - One of Us

238. (NA) - S2x04 - Le Jazz Hot

239. (NA) - S2x04 - Don't Go Breaking My Heart

240. (NA) - S2x04 - With You I'm Born Again

241. (NA) - S2x04 - Sing!

242. (NA) - S2x05 - Whatever Happened to Saturday Night?

243. (NA) - S2x05 - Touch a Touch a Touch a Touch Me

244. (NA) - S2x05 - Sweet Transvestite

245. (NA) - S2x05 - Time Warp

246. (NA) - S2x05 - There's a Light (Over at the Frankenstein Place)

247. (NA) - S2x05 - Damn It, Janet

248. (NA) - S2x05 - Science Fiction Double Feature

249. (NA) - S2x05 - Planet, Schmanet, Janet

250. (NA) - S2x06 - One Love (People Get Ready)

251. (NA) - S2x07 - Singing In the Rain/Umbrella

252. (NA) - S2x07 - Nowadays/Hot Honey rag

253. (NA) - S2x07 - Make 'Em Laugh

254. (NA) - S2x07 - Conjunction Junction

255. (NA) - S2x08 - Ohio

256. (NA) - S2x08 - Sway

257. (NA) - S2x09 - The Living Years

258. (NA) - S2x10 - Last Christmas

259. (NA) - S2x10 - You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch

260. (NA) - S2x10 - We Need a Little Christmas

261. (NA) - S2x10 - Welcome Christmas

262. (NA) - S2x10 - Merry Christmas, Darling

263. (NA) - S2x11 - Need You Now

264. (NA) - S2x12 - P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)

265. (NA) - S2x12 - When I Get You Alone

266. (NA) - S2x12 - Fat Bottomed Girls

267. (NA) - S2x12 - Firework

268. (NA) - S2x12 - My Funny Valentine

269. (NA) - S2x13 - Sing

270. (NA) - S2x13 - I Know What Boys Like

271. (NA) - S2x13 - Take Me or Leave Me

272. (NA) - S2x13 - Baby

273. (NA) - S2x13 - This Little Light of Mine

274. (NA) - S2x14 - Blame It (On the Alcohol)

275. (NA) - S2x14 - My Headband

276. (NA) - S2x14 - One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer

277. (NA) - S2x15 - Afternoon Delight

278. (NA) - S2x15 - Do You Wanna Touch Me (Oh Yeah)

279. (NA) - S2x15 - Kiss

280. (NA) - S2x16 - Jesus Is My Friend

281. (NA) - S2x16 - Hell to the No

282. (NA) - S2x16 - Big Ass Heart

283. (NA) - S2x16 - Only Child

284. (NA) - S2x16 - Get It Right

285. (NA) - S2x16 - Loser Like Me

286. (NA) - S2x16 - Trouty Mouth

287. (NA) - S2x17 - Turning Tables

288. (NA) - S2x17 - Ain't No Way

289. (NA) - S2x17 - All By Myself

290. (NA) - S2x17 - I Follow Rivers

291. (NA) - S2x18 - I've Gotta Be Me

292. (NA) - S2x19 - Dreams

293. (NA) - S2x19 - Never Going Back Again

294. (NA) - S2x19 - I Don't Want to Know

295. (NA) - S2x19 - Go Your Own Way

296. (NA) - S2x19 - Don't Stop

297. (NA) - S2x19 - Songbird

298. (NA) - S2x19 - Nice to Meet You, Have I Slept with You?

299. (NA) - S2x20 - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance with You

300. (NA) - S2x20 - Friday

301. (NA) - S2x20 - Jar of Hearts

302. (NA) - S2x20 - Rolling in the Deep

303. (NA) - S2x20 - Isn't She Lovely

304. (NA) - S2x21 - Some People

305. (NA) - S2x21 - Try a Little Tenderness

306. (NA) - S2x21 - My Man

307. (NA) - S2x22 - Yeah!

308. (NA) - S2x22 - My Cup

309. (NA) - S2x22 - Light Up the World

310. (NA) - S2x22 - Bella Notte

311. (NA) - S2x22 - Pretending

312. (NA) - S2x22 - As Long as You're There

313. (NA) - S2x22 - Still Got Tonight

314. (NA) - S3x01 - It's Not Unusual

315. (NA) - S3x01 - Anything Goes/Anything You Can Do

316. (NA) - S3x01 - Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead

317. (NA) - S3x01 - We Got the Beat

318. (NA) - S3x01 - Big Spender

319. (NA) - S3x02 - Something's Coming

320. (NA) - S3x02 - I'm the Greatest Star

321. (NA) - S3x02 - Somewhere

322. (NA) - S3x03 - Spotlight

323. (NA) - S3x03 - Cool

324. (NA) - S3x03 - It's All Over

325. (NA) - S3x03 - Out Here On My Own

326. (NA) - S3x03 - Fix You

327. (NA) - S3x04 - Candyman

328. (NA) - S3x04 - Waiting for a Girl Like You

329. (NA) - S3x04 - Bein' Green

330. (NA) - S3x04 - Take Care of Yourself

331. (NA) - S3x05 - Tonight

332. (NA) - S3x05 - A Boy Like That/I Have a Love

333. (NA) - S3x06 - I Can't Go for That/You Make My Dreams Come True

334. (NA) - S3x06 - Hit Me with Your Best Shot/One Way or Another

335. (NA) - S3x06 - Hot for Teacher

336. (NA) - S3x06 - You and I/You and I

337. (NA) - S3x07 - Jolene

338. (NA) - S3x07 - Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

339. (NA) - S3x07 - I'm the Only One

340. (NA) - S3x07 - I Kissed a Girl

341. (NA) - S3x07 - Constant Craving

342. (NA) - S3x08 - Control

343. (NA) - S3x08 - Buenos Aires

344. (NA) - S3x08 - Survivor/I Will Survive

345. (NA) - S3x08 - Red Solo Cup

346. (NA) - S3x09 - Christmas Wrapping

347. (NA) - S3x09 - All I Want for Christmas Is You

348. (NA) - S3x09 - Do They Know It's Christmas?

349. (NA) - S3x09 - Santa Claus Is Coming to Town

350. (NA) - S3x09 - River

351. (NA) - S3x09 - Extraordinary Merry Christmas

352. (NA) - S3x09 - My Favorite Things

353. (NA) - S3x10 - Moves Like Jagger/Jumpin' Jack Flash

354. (NA) - S3x10 - Wedding Bell Blues (Bill)

355. (NA) - S3x10 - Summer Nights

356. (NA) - S3x10 - Without You

357. (NA) - S3x10 - The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

358. (NA) - S3x10 - We Found Love

359. (NA) - S3x11 - Scream

360. (NA) - S3x11 - Black or White

361. (NA) - S3x11 - Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'

362. (NA) - S3x11 - Ben

363. (NA) - S3x11 - Never Can Say Goodbye

364. (NA) - S3x11 - I Just Can't Stop Loving You

365. (NA) - S3x11 - Human Nature

366. (NA) - S3x11 - I Want You Back

367. (NA) - S3x12 - Don't Wanna Lose You

368. (NA) - S3x12 - Sexy and I Know It

369. (NA) - S3x12 - La Isla Bonita

370. (NA) - S3x12 - Bamboleo/Hero

371. (NA) - S3x12 - A Little Less Conversation

372. (NA) - S3x13 - Let Me Love You

373. (NA) - S3x13 - Stereo Hearts

374. (NA) - S3x13 - I Will Always Love You

375. (NA) - S3x13 - Cherish/Cherish

376. (NA) - S3x13 - You're the Top

377. (NA) - S3x13 - Chapel of Love

378. (NA) - S3x13 - Home

379. (NA) - S3x13 - L-O-V-E

380. (NA) - S3x14 - Fly/I Believe I Can Fly

381. (NA) - S3x14 - Here's to Us

382. (NA) - S3x14 - Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)

383. (NA) - S3x14 - Stand

384. (NA) - S3x14 - Glad You Came

385. (NA) - S3x15 - I'm Still Standing

386. (NA) - S3x15 - Up Up Up

387. (NA) - S3x15 - Rio/Hungry Like the Wolf

388. (NA) - S3x15 - Somebody That I Used to Know

389. (NA) - S3x16 - You Should Be Dancing

390. (NA) - S3x16 - More Than a Woman

391. (NA) - S3x16 - Stayin' Alive

392. (NA) - S3x16 - Disco Inferno

393. (NA) - S3x16 - How Deep Is Your Love

394. (NA) - S3x16 - If I Can't Have You

395. (NA) - S3x16 - Boogie Shoes

396. (NA) - S3x16 - Night Fever

397. (NA) - S3x17 - Saving All My Love For You

398. (NA) - S3x17 - My Love Is Your Love

399. (NA) - S3x17 - How Will I Know

400. (NA) - S3x17 - So Emotional

401. (NA) - S3x18 - The Music of the Night

402. (NA) - S3x18 - School's Out

403. (NA) - S3x18 - The Rain in Spain

404. (NA) - S3x18 - Cry

405. (NA) - S3x18 - Shake It Out

406. (NA) - S3x19 - Dinosaur

407. (NA) - S3x19 - What Makes You Beautiful

408. (NA) - S3x19 - Take My Breath Away

409. (NA) - S3x19 - Big Girls Don't Cry

410. (NA) - S3x19 - Love You Like a Love Song

411. (NA) - S3x20 - Mean

412. (NA) - S3x20 - I Won't Give Up

413. (NA) - S3x20 - Flashdance...What a Feeling

414. (NA) - S3x20 - Because You Loved Me

415. (NA) - S3x21 - Tongue Tied

416. (NA) - S3x21 - It's All Coming Back to Me Now

417. (NA) - S3x21 - Edge of Glory

418. (NA) - S3x21 - Starships

419. (NA) - S3x21 - Pinball Wizard

420. (NA) - S3x22 - I'll Remember

421. (NA) - S3x22 - You Get What You Give

422. (NA) - S3x22 - Glory Days

423. (NA) - S3x22 - Roots Before Branches

424. (NA) - S3x22 - Forever Young

425. (NA) - S4x01 - Call Me Maybe

426. (NA) - S4x01 - Sister Christian

427. (NA) - S4x01 - Never Say Never

428. (NA) - S4x02 - Boys/Boyfriend

429. (NA) - S4x02 - Hold It Against Me

430. (NA) - S4x02 - Gimme More

431. (NA) - S4x02 - Everytime

432. (NA) - S4x02 - Crazy/U Drive Me Crazy

433. (NA) - S4x02 - Oops!...I Did It Again

434. (NA) - S4x02 - 3

435. (NA) - S4x02 - Womanizer

436. (NA) - S4x03 - Everybody Wants to Rule the World

437. (NA) - S4x03 - Celebrity Skin

438. (NA) - S4x03 - The Way You Look Tonight/You're Never Fully Dressed Without a Smile

439. (NA) - S4x03 - A Change Would Do You Good

440. (NA) - S4x04 - Barely Breathing

441. (NA) - S4x04 - Give Your Heart a Break

442. (NA) - S4x04 - Mine

443. (NA) - S4x05 - Blow Me (One Last Kiss)

444. (NA) - S4x05 - Born to Hand Jive

445. (NA) - S4x05 - Juke Box Hero

446. (NA) - S4x06 - Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee

447. (NA) - S4x06 - Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee (Reprise)

448. (NA) - S4x06 - Greased Lightning

449. (NA) - S4x07 - My Dark Side

450. (NA) - S4x07 - Heroes

451. (NA) - S4x07 - Superman

452. (NA) - S4x08 - Whistle

453. (NA) - S4x08 - Let's Have a Kiki/Turkey Lurkey Time

454. (NA) - S4x08 - Home/Homeward Bound

455. (NA) - S4x08 - Come See About Me

456. (NA) - S4x08 - Live While We're Young

457. (NA) - S4x08 - Gangnam Style

458. (NA) - S4x09 - Something Stupid

459. (NA) - S4x09 - Being Alive

460. (NA) - S4x09 - Don't Dream It's Over

461. (NA) - S4x09 - Being Good Isn't Good Enough

462. (NA) - S4x09 - All That Jazz

463. (NA) - S4x10 - Feliz Navidad

464. (NA) - S4x10 - Hanukkah, Oh Hanukkah

465. (NA) - S4x10 - Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

466. (NA) - S4x10 - Jingle Bell Rock

467. (NA) - S4x11 - Baby Got Back

468. (NA) - S4x11 - No Scrubs

469. (NA) - S4x11 - Tell Him

470. (NA) - S4x11 - Locked Out of Heaven

471. (NA) - S4x11 - I Only Have Eyes for You

472. (NA) - S4x12 - Centerfold/Hot in Herre

473. (NA) - S4x12 - Let Me Love You (Until You Learn to Love Yourself)

474. (NA) - S4x12 - A Thousand Years

475. (NA) - S4x12 - This Is the New Year

476. (NA) - S4x12 - Torn

477. (NA) - S4x12 - Love Song

478. (NA) - S4x13 - Don't Stop Me Now

479. (NA) - S4x13 - Diva

480. (NA) - S4x13 - Make No Mistake (She's Mine)

481. (NA) - S4x13 - Nutbush City Limits

482. (NA) - S4x13 - Girl On Fire

483. (NA) - S4x13 - Hung Up

484. (NA) - S4x14 - Just Can't Get Enough

485. (NA) - S4x14 - Getting Married Today

486. (NA) - S4x14 - You're All I Need to Get By

487. (NA) - S4x14 - Anything Could Happen

488. (NA) - S4x14 - We've Got Tonite

489. (NA) - S4x15 - Shout

490. (NA) - S4x15 - Old Time Rock & Roll/Danger Zone

491. (NA) - S4x15 - You're All the World to Me

492. (NA) - S4x15 - Unchained Melody

493. (NA) - S4x15 - Footloose

494. (NA) - S4x15 - Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend/Material Girl

495. (NA) - S4x15 - In Your Eyes

496. (NA) - S4x16 - I Still Believe/Super Bass

497. (NA) - S4x16 - How to Be a Heartbreaker

498. (NA) - S4x16 - Closer

499. (NA) - S4x16 - The Bitch Is Back/Dress You Up

500. (NA) - S4x16 - Cold Hearted

501. (NA) - S4x16 - Bye Bye Bye/I Want It That Way

502. (NA) - S4x17 - Against All Odds (Take a Look at Me Now)

503. (NA) - S4x17 - Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go

504. (NA) - S4x17 - Wannabe

505. (NA) - S4x17 - My Prerogative

506. (NA) - S4x17 - Creep

507. (NA) - S4x17 - Mamma Mia

508. (NA) - S4x17 - Copacabana

509. (NA) - S4x18 - Say

510. (NA) - S4x18 - Your Song

511. (NA) - S4x18 - More Than Words

512. (NA) - S4x19 - Fight for Your Right (to Party)

513. (NA) - S4x19 - You Have More Friends Than You Know

514. (NA) - S4x19 - Outcast

515. (NA) - S4x19 - Don't Stop Believin' (Rachel)

516. (NA) - S4x19 - Next to Me

517. (NA) - S4x20 - We Will Rock You

518. (NA) - S4x20 - Longest Time

519. (NA) - S4x20 - Everybody Hurts

520. (NA) - S4x20 - You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'

521. (NA) - S4x20 - At the Ballet

522. (NA) - S4x20 - Little Girls

523. (NA) - S4x21 - For Once in My Life

524. (NA) - S4x21 - Uptight (Everything's Alright)

525. (NA) - S4x21 - I Wish

526. (NA) - S4x21 - Signed, Sealed, Delivered, I'm Yours

527. (NA) - S4x21 - You Are the Sunshine of My Life

528. (NA) - S4x21 - Higher Ground

529. (NA) - S4x21 - Superstition

530. (NA) - S4x22 - Hall of Fame

531. (NA) - S4x22 - Clarity

532. (NA) - S4x22 - Wings

533. (NA) - S4x22 - I Love It

534. (NA) - S4x22 - All or Nothing

535. (NA) - S4x22 - To Love You More

536. (NA) - S4x22 - Rainbow Connection

537. (NA) - S5x01 - Drive My Car

538. (NA) - S5x01 - You've Got to Hide Your Love Away

539. (NA) - S5x01 - Got to Get You Into My Life

540. (NA) - S5x01 - Yesterday

541. (NA) - S5x01 - A Hard Day's Night

542. (NA) - S5x01 - I Saw Her Standing There

543. (NA) - S5x02 - Here Comes the Sun

544. (NA) - S5x02 - Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band

545. (NA) - S5x02 - Get Back

546. (NA) - S5x02 - Hey Jude

547. (NA) - S5x02 - Something

548. (NA) - S5x02 - Revolution

549. (NA) - S5x03 - Fire and Rain

550. (NA) - S5x03 - No Surrender

551. (NA) - S5x04 - Marry the Night

552. (NA) - S5x04 - Wide Awake

553. (NA) - S5x04 - Applause

554. (NA) - S5x04 - Roar

555. (NA) - S5x05 - Wrecking Ball

556. (NA) - S5x05 - Blurred Lines

557. (NA) - S5x05 - On Our Way

558. (NA) - S5x05 - You Are Woman, I Am Man

559. (NA) - S5x06 - Honesty

560. (NA) - S5x06 - Piano Man

561. (NA) - S5x06 - My Life

562. (NA) - S5x06 - You May Be Right

563. (NA) - S5x06 - An Innocent Man

564. (NA) - S5x07 - You're My Best Friend

565. (NA) - S5x07 - Nasty/Rhythm Nation

566. (NA) - S5x07 - Into the Groove

567. (NA) - S5x07 - Cheek to Cheek

568. (NA) - S5x08 - Here Comes Santa Claus (Down Santa Claus Lane)

569. (NA) - S5x08 - The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)

570. (NA) - S5x08 - Mary's Little Boy Child

571. (NA) - S5x08 - Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree

572. (NA) - S5x08 - Love Child

573. (NA) - S5x08 - O Christmas Tree

574. (NA) - S5x09 - Whenever I Call You Friend

575. (NA) - S5x09 - My Lovin' (You're Never Gonna Get It)

576. (NA) - S5x09 - I Believe in a Thing Called Love

577. (NA) - S5x09 - Every Breath You Take

578. (NA) - S5x09 - Don't Rain On My Parade

579. (NA) - S5x09 - Brave

580. (NA) - S5x09 - Breakaway

581. (NA) - S5x10 - The Happening

582. (NA) - S5x10 - Hold On

583. (NA) - S5x10 - Barracuda

584. (NA) - S5x10 - Gloria

585. (NA) - S5x10 - Jumpin' Jumpin'

586. (NA) - S5x10 - Danny's Song

587. (NA) - S5x11 - Vacation

588. (NA) - S5x11 - America

589. (NA) - S5x11 - More Than a Feeling

590. (NA) - S5x11 - I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

591. (NA) - S5x11 - Mr. Roboto/Counting Stars

592. (NA) - S5x11 - I Love LA

593. (NA) - S5x12 - Raise Your Glass

594. (NA) - S5x12 - Happy

595. (NA) - S5x12 - Keep Holding On

596. (NA) - S5x12 - Toxic

597. (NA) - S5x13 - Loser Like Me

598. (NA) - S5x13 - Party All the Time

599. (NA) - S5x13 - I Am Changing

600. (NA) - S5x13 - Don't Stop Believin' (Season Five)

601. (NA) - S5x13 - Just Give Me a Reason

602. (NA) - S5x13 - Be Okay

603. (NA) - S5x14 - Don't Sleep in the Subway

604. (NA) - S5x14 - You Make Me Feel So Young

605. (NA) - S5x14 - Best Day of My Life

606. (NA) - S5x14 - Rockstar

607. (NA) - S5x14 - Downtown

608. (NA) - S5x14 - People

609. (NA) - S5x15 - Not While I'm Around

610. (NA) - S5x15 - I'm Still Here

611. (NA) - S5x15 - You Make Me Feel Like a Natural Woman

612. (NA) - S5x15 - Colorblind

613. (NA) - S5x15 - Broadway Baby

614. (NA) - S5x15 - No One Is Alone

615. (NA) - S5x16 - Addicted to Love

616. (NA) - S5x16 - Love Is a Battlefield

617. (NA) - S5x16 - I Want to Know What Love Is

618. (NA) - S5x16 - Let's Wait Awhile

619. (NA) - S5x17 - Lovefool

620. (NA) - S5x17 - I'm the Greatest Star

621. (NA) - S5x17 - Pumpin Blood

622. (NA) - S5x17 - Who Are You Now

623. (NA) - S5x17 - NYC

624. (NA) - S5x18 - Piece of My Heart

625. (NA) - S5x18 - Wake Me Up

626. (NA) - S5x18 - The Rose

627. (NA) - S5x18 - Doo Wop (That Thing)

628. (NA) - S5x19 - Werewolves of London

629. (NA) - S5x19 - Memory

630. (NA) - S5x19 - Lucky Star

631. (NA) - S5x19 - Take Me Home Tonight

632. (NA) - S5x19 - I Melt with You

633. (NA) - S5x20 - All of Me

634. (NA) - S5x20 - No Time At All

635. (NA) - S5x20 - Shakin' My Head

636. (NA) - S5x20 - Pompeii

637. (NA) - S5x20 - Glitter in the Air

638. (NA) - S5x20 - Girls on Film

639. (NA) - S6x01 - Sing

640. (NA) - S6x01 - Dance the Night Away

641. (NA) - S6x01 - Uninvited

642. (NA) - S6x01 - Let It Go

643. (NA) - S6x01 - Suddenly Seymour

644. (NA) - S6x02 - Tightrope

645. (NA) - S6x02 - Home

646. (NA) - S6x02 - Problem

647. (NA) - S6x02 - Mustang Sally

648. (NA) - S6x02 - Viva Voce

649. (NA) - S6x03 - It's Too Late

650. (NA) - S6x03 - Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow/Head Over Feet

651. (NA) - S6x03 - You Learn/You've Got a Friend

652. (NA) - S6x03 - Hand in My Pocket/I Feel the Earth Move

653. (NA) - S6x03 - So Far Away

654. (NA) - S6x04 - Rock Lobster

655. (NA) - S6x04 - Whip It

656. (NA) - S6x04 - Thousand Miles

657. (NA) - S6x04 - Bitch

658. (NA) - S6x05 - All Out of Love

659. (NA) - S6x05 - Father Figure

660. (NA) - S6x05 - My Sharona

661. (NA) - S6x05 - You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)

662. (NA) - S6x06 - Wishin' And Hoping

663. (NA) - S6x06 - Baby It's You

664. (NA) - S6x06 - What the World Needs Now

665. (NA) - S6x06 - Promises, Promises

666. (NA) - S6x06 - They Long to Be Close to You

667. (NA) - S6x06 - I'll Never Fall in Love Again

668. (NA) - S6x06 - Alfie

669. (NA) - S6x07 - You Give Love a Bad Name

670. (NA) - S6x07 - Somebody Loves You

671. (NA) - S6x07 - All About That Bass

672. (NA) - S6x07 - I Know Where I've Been

673. (NA) - S6x07 - Same Love

674. (NA) - S6x08 - I'm So Excited

675. (NA) - S6x09 - Uptown Funk

676. (NA) - S6x09 - I Want to Break Free

677. (NA) - S6x09 - Break Free

678. (NA) - S6x09 - Lose My Breath

679. (NA) - S6x09 - Cool Kids

680. (NA) - S6x09 - Friday I'm in Love

681. (NA) - S6x10 - Far From Over

682. (NA) - S6x10 - Rather Be

683. (NA) - S6x10 - Rise

684. (NA) - S6x10 - The Trolley Song

685. (NA) - S6x10 - The Final Countdown

686. (NA) - S6x11 - We Built This City

687. (NA) - S6x11 - Mickey

688. (NA) - S6x11 - Chandelier

689. (NA) - S6x11 - Come Sail Away

690. (NA) - S6x11 - Listen to Your Heart

691. (NA) - S6x11 - Take Me to Church

692. (NA) - S6x12 - Pony

693. (NA) - S6x12 - Don't Stop Believing (Pilot/2009)

694. (NA) - S6x12 - Popular

695. (NA) - S6x12 - I'm His Child

696. (NA) - S6x12 - I Kissed a Girl

697. (NA) - S6x13 - Daydream Believer

698. (NA) - S6x13 - Someday We'll Be Together

699. (NA) - S6x13 - I Lived

700. (NA) - S6x13 - This Time

701. (NA) - S6x13 - Teach Your Children

702. (NA) - S6x13 - The Winner Takes It All

#admirabletragedy #glee #glee stats #glee soundtrack rating project #glee soundtrack rating project results

[retrievablememories]

a sudden desire | johnny (m)

title: a sudden desire pairing: johnny x black reader genre: fluff, smut, fantasy/sci-fi summary: when you make an emergency landing on an ice planet, you have no choice but to seek refuge for the night. word count: 5.4k warnings: detailed description of an injury, mentions of violence, tending to wounds, mentions of insecurities, heavy petting, fingering, some dirty talk, unprotected sex—do not try at home!! 🔞 a/n: this exists in the same universe as my other fic, empathy. i’m developing this universe literally as i go, so plz excuse any plot holes, illogical shit, etc. i feel like this might be a bit too similar to another fic i wrote on here, but whatever chile it’s an excuse for some johnny smut so...bone app the teeth

The cold bites into your nose, fingertips, lips—the very bone marrow of your body. All you can do is shudder against the strong, icy wind beating across your skin and cling tighter to the backpack on your shoulders. You flex your fingers on the backpack straps to keep the blood circulating in them, though that doesn’t do much good when they hurt too much to move properly.

“Fuck, it’s freezing,” Ten curses beside you, and you’d agree if your lips didn’t feel frozen shut. Out of all places for your ship to give out, it’s just your luck that it happened on Kankara. Ice planet or not, though, you all made it out only by the skin of your teeth. The raiders who were on your tail would’ve surely taken advantage of the ship’s ruined state—one that they caused—if Laila and Lucas hadn’t taken them out with their gunning skills.

You, Ten, Lucas, and Laila huddle together near the entrance of the repair garage as you watch Johnny transfer the team’s credits to the repairman. Surprisingly, he’s one of the few other humans you’ve encountered in your travels across the galaxy, and it makes you wonder how he ended up here.

You already know there aren’t going to be many credits left after paying to fix the extensive damages the ship sustained, which is even more reason to get it in working order again. Because once it’s running, you can seek more missions—and more bounties.

“What’s the cheapest place around here that we can crash at for a while?” Johnny asks the man once he takes his Unit Pad back. The man scoffs, throwing him a look that’s equal parts sympathetic and amused.

“Not many hovercabs run around here, especially this time of night. The closest and cheapest place you’ll reach on foot is Drakar’s Motel...but it ain’t shit to write home about.” The man gives Johnny the directions. Most of what he says goes in one of your ears and out the other. You’ll be amazed if half of your brain isn’t frozen by the time you get indoors.

Laila sighs at the prospect of shacking up in a strange place. “I wish we could take the smaller craft,” she says, stomping her feet like a child.

“Too bad it got damaged too,” Lucas says, rubbing her shoulders in a futile attempt to warm her up. “These raiders are fuckin’ ruthless, man.”

“I guess it’ll have to do,” Johnny sighs, pocketing his pad and making his way back to the group. He reaches for one of your hands and you uncurl it from your backpack strap to take his. It’s an effort, but you feel better the instant his skin is on yours, so you think it’s worth it.

The snow never stops falling on this planet. It’s a perpetual winter, only much less jolly and welcoming than your typical winter wonderland. There doesn’t seem to be much of anything here. Just scattered buildings, empty streets, snow, and more snow—like a frozen desert. You don’t mind a bit of cold weather every now and then, but this is an extreme you don’t think you could ever get used to.

Kankara’s neighboring moons hang large in the sky, providing ample light to travel by. At least you don’t have to worry too much about whatever’s lurking in the dark.

Thankfully, you don’t have to walk the streets for too long before a bright glow begins manifesting through the ice and snow, as if some holy mirage. The slanted edges of a building come into focus, and it becomes clear that this is the motel’s silhouette.

“Finally!” Ten kicks a mound of snow in front of him and it sprays up around Laila, who promptly blesses him out for dousing her in more cold. As usual, Lucas has to squeeze his way in between them to stop the ensuing mess.

The first thing you notice about the motel is its neon sign. Not all of the letters work, so it looks more like “a a’s ote” than “Drakar’s Motel.” You simply chuckle and roll your eyes at that. If you were the one who had to come out in this cold to fix the letters, you’d leave the shit alone too.

There’s not much to see on the outside of the motel, with white powder covering nearly every inch of its exterior. You have to admit that it looks quite small, though, even from farther away.

When you all get inside, you realize it’s not much better. The temperature in the lobby is only a few degrees higher than the outside, at most. Not brutally cold anymore, but certainly not enough to warm anybody up. The lobby itself is barely bigger than one floor of your ship, and the burning fluorescent lights make you feel like a bug pinned underneath a glass pane, strangely lit up and displayed for all to see.

An extraterrestrial you recognize as a Vykyll sits behind the check-in counter reading a magazine. They’re balancing their chin on one of their tentacles, looking half-asleep and extremely bored with their job...or with life itself. Their nametag reads “Srynei.”

Srynei looks up from their magazine and gives you all a weary expression. “Before you even ask, there are only two one-beds available. The other rooms are either occupied or defunct.”

“One bed?” Lucas echoes, his eyes widening. He looks stuck between incredulity and annoyance.

You and Johnny glance at each other. He shrugs. “Well…it’s not like we have the money to pay for anything better, anyway.” He takes out his Unit Pad to hand to the alien. “Book it for five nights.”

Srynei places their magazine down and takes out a Unit Pad with the motel’s logo on it. “2 rooms for 50 credits a night...you got it.”

“Defunct? What does that mean?” Laila asks, furrowing her eyebrows.

“It means we can’t stay in those rooms, dumbass,” Ten replies, flicking her forehead. She catches his wrist before he can pull away fast enough and twists it, making him yelp in pain.

“I know what it means, watermelon head. I’m asking, why are they defunct?”

“Burst pipes, leaks, shattered windows from the sheer amount of cold...not my problem, though, I just check in the guests.” Srynei rolls their eyes as if they’re exhausted with the absurdity of the entire situation. You can’t imagine how many off-world visitors Kankara gets for the motel to still be in business, but stranger things have happened.

After the transaction is finished, Srynei holds out two room keys and you take them. 102 and 105, which means at least you won’t have to venture back out to use the stairs.

“So who’s sleeping with who?” Laila asks.

“I thought that was obvious,” Lucas snickers, wrapping his arms around her and Ten’s shoulders. He squishes them against his body in a too-tight hug and they both complain for air. “We should all leave these two,” he nods his head in your and Johnny’s direction, “to themselves, shouldn’t we?” It makes sense. The statement is innocent enough, but the sly faces of your three friends reveal their true thoughts.

“Can you not?” You laugh nervously, tossing Lucas the key for room 105. “I’m about ready to hit the sheets, so…” You don’t wait for his response before making your way down the hall, which is a tad narrower than you’re comfortable with. Everyone else will probably end up walking single-file to fit through. “God, this place is a claustrophobic nightmare.”

You fit the key in the lock and try to keep your mind off what Lucas just said. With some success. Okay, not a lot.

You and Johnny have been together for a little over 5 moon cycles now, but it’s safe to say you haven’t done much other than kiss and cuddle—which is mostly fine with you. But sometimes, you wonder how he feels about it and if he’s...content with it? Or maybe even growing tired of it? You feel bad for even thinking like that, because you know he doesn’t care and you shouldn’t either, but…

This isn’t the first time you’ve slept in the same bed together, but now that’s it been brought up, you can’t keep your mind off the subject of doing more. And as if on-cue, it makes your oh-so-familiar self-doubts rise to the surface.

“Are you okay?” Johnny’s voice interrupts your thoughts. His hand clasps over yours, and that’s when you realize you’ve been fumbling with the key in the lock for a good few moments now. He steadies your hand and helps you finally turn the key and unlock the door. “You must be really cold, let’s get you inside.”

“It’s not gonna be much warmer in there...” you say. The other three are already raising hell as they try to squeeze past each other in the small corridor, and you know it’s going to be a long few days.

The room is just as small as you expect it to be—and just as cold. There’s a heating and air conditioning unit by the window, though you doubt even it works judging by the room’s temperature. “Sometimes I feel like we never left Earth. Some of this stuff is so similar…” You wonder if the motel was purposely modeled after its Earth-based counterparts, or if there simply weren’t enough funds to spring for more advanced alien tech.

You don’t know a lot about Kankara, but you’ve heard it mostly described as a vast and cold-hearted place. The latter characteristic is undeniable of the weather, but you don’t know if you can make that kind of snap judgment for the planet’s inhabitants. Living somewhere like this will make anyone’s ambitions and hopes shrink to near nothingness, centering more on survival than basic pleasures.

“Takes getting used to,” Johnny sighs, closing the door and stripping off his two outer jackets as carefully as possible. “It’s like déjà vu.”

“You should get cleaned up,” you say, fiddling with the switches on the HVAC. As you thought, nothing works. That’s lovely.

“You should go first.” Johnny comes over to you and rubs his hands on your arms to try and warm you up.

“No way, I’m not the injured one here. I’d think you need it more than me.”

“Isn’t the first and probably won’t be the last. I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

Johnny moves your braids to the side and kisses your cheek in what is usually an innocent gesture. Him saying, “Don’t make me beg,” immediately after, though, makes it decidedly less so.

“O-okay,” you squeak, rushing to grab your clothes and head to the bathroom.

The bathroom is plain as hell, but clean, at least. You scrub off as much of the day’s dirt and grime as you can. Thankfully, the water isn’t as cold as the rest of the place, but it still isn’t as warm as you’d prefer.

Johnny takes his turn after you dress and come out. You climb onto the bed and notice that a portion of the window is in view—he must’ve pushed the drapes back. You stare out of the glass, watching the snow fall endlessly and wondering how it never piles higher. It’s as if the planet is in stasis, perpetually frozen on both a physical and time-based level.

Johnny comes out of the shower shirtless and looking not much happier than he was when he got in. His mouth is tucked into that straight line that always makes you laugh. “The hot water only lasted about 2 more minutes before it cut out on me, so that was fun.”

You try not to snort. “That’s tragic, Johnny.”

“Truly a modern tragedy,” he says sarcastically, brushing his wet bangs out of his eyes. He glances at you over his shoulder as he puts his worn clothes away. “Maybe we could take a shower together next time.”

“I’m sure,” you murmur, embarrassed, tucking your knees up close to your chest.

You glance at the wound just below the left side of his ribcage. It’s mostly scar tissue, no thanks to the cauterizing heat of the blaster shot that struck him, but it still looks horrible. And it must feel similarly, with the way he moves around the room being extra careful of it.

“You need to redress it,” you tell him.

“I know,” he sighs, his shoulders slumping at the thought of doing that. Johnny turns back to look at you, a pout on his bow-shaped lips. “Will you help me?”

A small smile crosses your lips. “Okay.” Johnny roots around in his pack for the medical supplies he remembered to pack before you all ditched the ship. He takes out the roll of bandages, AntiBac Gel, and bandage clips and hands them to you before gingerly climbing on the bed, propping a pillow against the headboard to lean on.

“We’re lucky we got away when we did,” you say, spreading the AntiBac over the wound. “Those bastards wouldn’t let up…”

“We definitely would’ve been way worse off without the others,” Johnny agrees. He glances at your hand moving across his skin. “Seeing you fight always reminds me of when we first met, though…all those training sessions we had, I mean.”

“Why?” You grimace slightly at the scarred edges of the wound. Not because you’re disgusted, but because you feel bad at how painful it looks.

“Back then, you were ruthless…and it fascinated me. Even though I’m not a huge fan of violence.” His lips twitch as if he doesn’t mean to smile about it, but he does anyway. “And you’re still the same but it’s...like, different, you know?”

“I’m afraid I don’t.” You laugh, unraveling the bandage and beginning to wrap it around his chest.

“I can’t explain it,” he says, looking at you from behind his still-soggy bangs. You glance at him, drinking in the curve of his cheekbones and his chin in the light of the bedside lamp. “It’s just...everything seems a little different when you’re in love with someone.”

Your fingers falter with the bandage for a second, and you hope he doesn’t notice. If he does, he doesn’t acknowledge it. “I suppose I can’t argue with that,” you say. “But...I’m just doing what has to be done. To keep ourselves alive. It gets scary out there, and…” You falter, unsure what to say. Or if you should say what you’re thinking.

“And you can’t live without me?” Johnny says, putting his hand over his heart.

“You literally never get tired, do you?” You grin, finishing the bandage and securing it with the clips.

“I dunno, sometimes. I am just a human, after all.” Johnny brings a hand up to tuck a stray braid back into your scarf. He lies back on the small bed when you’re done, taking your hand in his and kissing it. “Thank you, my queen. How can I ever repay you from saving me from a certain demise?”

“You’re such a clown.” You shake your head, laughing and pulling away from him long enough to put away the makeshift first-aid kit.

After you store the supplies, you climb back onto the bed. It’s barely enough for the both of you, let alone Johnny’s big body, and you find yourself nearly on top of him. You mentally will your palms not to sweat as you sit in such close proximity to him while he’s half-naked. You do enjoy it, though. A lot. You find yourself tracing one of his many old scars—one long line extending across his bicep—with your gaze.

“Didn’t you get that one from the day we escaped the EECA?” you ask quietly.

Johnny glances at it and nods, his lips curling into a slight smile. “Mm...yeah. Remember when Lucas kissed you that day?”

“I don’t want to remember.” Your skin grows hot with the memory, though more out of embarrassment than anything else.

“Did you enjoy it?” His eyes crinkle with laughter.

You give him a skeptical look. “No, not really!? We didn’t know each other that well then, and I don’t like having my personal space invaded.”

Johnny considers that, tucking his bottom lip between his teeth before looking at you. “What about me?” His tone lowers and he inches closer, glancing at your lips.

You raise your eyebrows and place a hand on his chest. “I know you aren’t trying it with a serious wound right now.”

“I’m already halfway hard.” He smirks, adjusting his sleep pants.

Your chest warms straight through, enough to make you forget all about the frigidness of the motel room. You feel both anxious and enthralled. The two emotions create a conflicting dichotomy inside of you, and it makes you uncertain of how to respond. You shove his shoulder, making sure to be careful of his side. “What kind of freak gets off on having their wounds tended to?”

You both laugh, but Johnny grins nervously after a moment, suddenly becoming much more shy than he was a few minutes ago. “You know it’s all just me being silly, right? You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I just want you to be comfortable.”

You just hum and look at him, regarding his features, before kissing him very tenderly on the lips. “I know, John.” After you pull away, you continue observing each other, though it doesn’t feel awkward, just—tense. Without a word, you both lean in and kiss again, a little deeper than before. His hand cradles the side of your face and neck, drifting between the two as if he isn’t sure where to settle.

Johnny licks into your mouth and you respond in kind, sliding your arm across his shoulders to pull him a little closer. Your touch is often still tentative with him, especially when you’re more intimate like this, still not quite sure if you’re allowed to have this, if it’s okay to indulge.

Johnny pulls away slightly to rest his forehead on yours, his lips still moving against your mouth when he speaks. “We...really don’t have to if you’re not ready,” he says, sounding slightly winded from the kiss alone.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” you respond. You touch the hem of the bandages where they meet his skin, a little above his abs, and your hand keeps hovering there, unsure if you can touch him that way.

“It doesn’t matter,” he responds, moving closer to kiss you again.

You don’t know how long you sit there simply kissing each other, tasting each other’s lips as if there will never be enough of this—this sweetness shared between you.

After a beat of hesitation, you allow yourself to touch his abdomen, feeling the firm indentations of muscle underneath your hand. He’s impossibly warm even though you’re on an ice planet—it’s like he’s his own personal space heater. His skin is soft under yours, and he smells good enough to drown in forever.

In response to your touches, Johnny’s hand leaves your face and travels to your side, sliding down your waist and lower to your hip. His fingers are close to the inside of your thigh, moving over the fabric of your pajama pants.

Your hand drifts to the waistband of his pants, too, though you hesitate to go further. You realize with a bit of surprise, though, that you very much want this, more than you possibly let yourself believe. There are still many things you’re apprehensive about doing or saying with Johnny, but in this present point in time, you feel positive that you want to feel him in, around, under, over top of you—it doesn’t matter how.

Johnny’s lips separate from yours, and he moves his mouth to the soft skin of your cheek, ear, jaw, neck. Wherever he can reach is fair game at this point. “You can touch me. If you want.” He says this while kissing your neck, letting his voice vibrate across your nerves and seep into the very fibers of your being.

You take up his offer.

You tentatively slide your hand past the waistband. You don’t go underneath his underwear, but that’s fine for you. For the both of you. Instead, you feel him over the fabric, caressing the curve of his hardening cock and teasing the sensitive head with trembling fingers. Johnny moans softly against your neck, sighing and pressing his hips a little closer into your hand.

“Should I let you have all the fun?” he asks, kissing your throat.

“No,” you reply, breathless but still amused, “that wouldn’t be very fair, would it.”

Johnny vocalizes his pleasure and agreement when his fingers slip lower, pressing between your legs and gliding over your clit through the layers of your clothing. Your breath hitches, but you don’t stop stroking his dick, and he grows bolder with his own actions, sliding his hand up and away—only for a second—and then down into your pants, burdened with one less layer and giving you more calculating touches.

He strokes your clit as if he’s never touched anything so gently, and it makes you grip the back of his damp head and pull him closer to you, if at all possible. He answers that need for proximity by coming back up to claim your lips again, your tongues gliding against each other’s in the room’s quiet.

Your fingers are sticky from Johnny’s precum leaking into his underwear and onto your hand, and likewise, you are growing increasingly wetter in his hold.

Johnny moves as if he means to climb on top of you, but he winces and grunts halfway through the motion and you stop, looking at him with wide eyes.

“Are you hurt? I told you this wasn’t a good idea…”

“Stop worrying about me,” he says, though he doesn’t try to move again. “It’s just a little pain...but, um...maybe on the side is better.”

You nod, and you both spend a few awkward seconds shuffling around on the bed so Johnny is spooning you instead, your back to his front. You feel a little disappointed about not being able to see him, but that dissipates when he resumes touching you and kissing your nape. You mean to reach behind you to take care of him, too, but he seems content with gently rocking his hips against your ass, grinding his dick between your cheeks.

“Is this enough for you?” he asks, his voice soft and deep.

“W-what?” You can guess what he means, but being asked takes you off guard.

“Do you like how I’m touching you?” Johnny applies a little more pressure on your clit when he asks this, and you try unsuccessfully to not shudder like a leaf in a windstorm at the sensation. Combined with the sound of his voice, it’s an electrifying kind of feeling. “Or do you want more?”

It seems like every part of your body is throbbing with yes. “I...want more.”

Johnny lays a kiss against your shoulder. You feel him pull your underwear to the side and drag his middle finger against your clit and down to your hole, teasing you as if he doesn’t think he’ll insert it. Your body tenses and you moan. You don’t know if you should press back against his dick or into his hand, and it’s the sweetest, yet hardest, decision you’ve ever had to make.

Johnny finally eases his finger inside of you and makes a sound you can’t quite distinguish. “Is this all for me?”

“W-who else would it be for?” Your words are almost lost to the pillow as you use it to muffle your increasing sounds.

“I’m flattered, really. You shouldn’t have,” he snickers, pumping his finger into you. He makes sure to drag his palm across your clit as he does, carefully but firmly enough to make you pant. He caresses your inner walls until he finds your G spot and then focuses his energies on pleasuring that part of you.

“Shit...Johnny…” You curl your fingers into the fabric of the sheets beneath you.

Johnny slips another finger into you, and the stretch sets your nerves on fire with a more intense bliss. His mouth returns to your skin, kissing and licking and biting you everywhere.

“Johnny, please…” You reach back to grasp his hair, needing something to hold onto. He slips his right hand to your front, grasping one of your breasts through your shirt and running his thumb over the hardened nipple. You two are a tangle of limbs at this point, blurring into each other in the best possible way.

Your abdomen grows tense and your stomach warms as you come closer to your orgasm. You find yourself gripping Johnny’s arm, wanting him deeper inside of you, yet nearly wishing he’d stop for fear of being overwhelmed.

“Are you gonna come? Good. I wanna feel you gush around me,” Johnny whispers into your ear. He slips his right hand past the collar of your shirt, palming your bare breasts and pinching your nipples between his fingers.

You moan brokenly as the cord tethering you to your composure snaps, making you come and clench around Johnny’s fingers. The sound of him fucking you with his hand grows wetter, and you hear Johnny cursing in response.

Just when you think you can’t take anymore of his fingers curling into your spot, he pulls them out and puts them in his mouth, sucking them clean.

“You taste so good.” Johnny sounds drunk with lust—as if him rutting against your ass wasn’t enough of an indicator. You crane your head towards him, grip his chin, and bring his lips down to yours, tasting yourself on his mouth. He kisses you hungrily as soon as your lips meet. You almost have to pry him away to say your next words.

“I want more...” you say quietly against his lips.

Johnny smirks. “How much more?”

“You know what I want.”

“Hm...do I?”

“John…”

“Yes, queen?”

You blow air through your nose in lieu of cackling outright. “Inside me, please.”

Johnny gives you a soft peck before gripping the waistband of your underwear and pushing it down your legs. You help him slide them off the rest of the way, and he does the same for himself. His dick springs up between you, flushed and wet with precum. He grips it and guides it between your thighs, though he doesn’t enter you just yet.

The tip is sticky as it pokes against your thigh and then slides through your lower lips. You shudder at feeling him so close to you, hard and warm and yearning. He rubs against you like that for a few moments, his shaft stimulating your clit and making you leak onto him even more, his dick glistening with it. Johnny grasps your hip and moves your body in tune with his own movements, and you swear you see a tiny explosion of stars every time the vein on his cock rubs your clit.

“You’re killing me,” you sigh, rolling your head against the pillow before quickly stopping. You don’t need the hassle of retying your scarf if it comes off—and God knows it will if you continue.

“I think I’ve tortured us both enough.” Johnny places the tip at your entrance and slowly inches inside. Even that much makes you gasp, and you continue whimpering as he spreads you open with his thick shaft. Johnny’s breaths grow more labored, and he groans long and low when he finally bottoms out.

There’s little room left for words when he starts thrusting, taking it slower than you expected—but you don’t mind. Even though you’re already soaking and pliable from his earlier actions, he takes his time with fucking into you, guiding you along his length and pushing his hips to meet yours in an intimate rhythm. When he brushes against that same sensitive spot with his dick, you feel like your body’s been gripped with an almost painful kind of pleasure. One that holds onto you and refuses to ever let go.

It’s all so overwhelming.

“I love you,” he moans, pushing his cock in and dragging it back out with all the leisure in the world, “so much.” Your mouth falls open, and you want to say something back, anything, but you can’t make the words come out. Instead, you’re taken aback as tears spring to your eyes, choking you and closing your throat off to any sentiment you might want to express.

This isn’t the first time he’s told you that. You both know this well. But within this context, it makes your head spin with a new kind of dizziness. It all feels so good, too good, too much to bear.

You bite his arm to keep yourself silent, though it’s too late, and he feels your tears dripping onto his skin. Johnny handles you as if you’re made of glass, drawing your face towards his as he looks at you and wipes your wet cheeks. You still aren’t comfortable crying in front of him, but he never minds.

“Look at me,” he says. Johnny’s still moving inside you, sliding into you all slick and deep, and it makes you feel nearly too vulnerable to tolerate, as if you’ve been flayed open. But you do it anyway, latching onto his warm eyes. His skin shines from a thin layer of sweat, and it makes his hair stick to his forehead. The lamp light hitting his face makes his eyes look like two never-ending pools of warm honey, and he cups your face and kisses you tenderly when you lock eyes, and it’s all just too much.

“John, holy fuck.” You don’t really mean to say that, of all things, but it can’t be stopped once your orgasm floods through you, only it isn’t the violent and quick kind—it’s more of a slow buildup that finally bursts apart, spreading ecstasy through your whole body. You moan and tremble uncontrollably as Johnny slowly strokes you through your climax, still rubbing your clit and fucking into you deep.

Everything becomes a tiny bit blurrier for you, but you don’t fail to notice his own reactions as he grows closer, his thighs trembling from the effort of keeping his pace even. Finally, Johnny crushes your body against his as if you could melt together, pulling out to cum over your thighs and stomach. He buries his face into your shoulder and groans against you, and it’s a sound you think you’ll want to hear for the rest of your life. He keeps stroking his dick in between your thighs until he’s spent, his chest heaving from the effort of it all.

You both lie there for a few long minutes, simply trying to catch your breath. You still feel the dried tears on your face, though you try your best to ignore them, not wanting to ruin the moment with unwelcome feelings.

Johnny pulls his hand out of your shirt and sits up, though it takes an extra bit of strength on his part. You feel strangely guilty about how much you dislike suddenly being parted from his touch. As if he can sense your unease, Johnny grasps your hand in both of his and gives it a long kiss before going to the bathroom.

You hear the water running. Then, Johnny comes back quickly with a small towel. He climbs onto the bed and helps you into a sitting position.

“I’m sorry it’s not warm.” He smiles sheepishly, dabbing the washcloth against your cheeks as he erases the remnants of the tears.

You give him a small smile in return. “Nothing on this planet is.”

He cleans the mess he left on your lower body before tending to himself. After he’s done, you both pull your clothes back on—because it’s far too cold to sleep without anything on—and Johnny finally finds a shirt.

In the dark of the room, you curl up against each other to keep out the chill. When you wake up in the morning, you know you’ll be greeted to more cold and snow. It’ll still be days before you can return to your ship. Depending on how many credits are left, you might have to swap a few meals for Reserve Paks instead of eating decent food. You can already taste the lukewarm, oatmeal-like consistency of it in your mouth.

Despite that...you still have your friends and teammates. You still have Johnny. Maybe this could be a peculiar form of happiness. Maybe this could be contentment. Something that belongs wholly to you.

You trace a circle on the back of Johnny’s hand, studying his features illuminated by the moonlight spilling through the blinds. You shuffle closer to be level with his ear, and he blinks at you sleepily.

“I love you too.”

#johnny suh #nct 127 smut #johnny smut #ambw kpop #ambw fic #nct ambw #ambw scenarios #ambw imagines #nct 127 scenarios #nct johnny #nct 127 imagines

[buckevantommy]

'(Un)Happiest Season' review

Simply put, it wasn't enjoyable as a romance or a comedy or a Christmas flick. It failed on many fronts, but this reviewer from Salon.com puts the thing into words for Happiest Season's main failings: 

What's bad: There were two main criticisms of "Happiest Season." The first being: Can't LGBTQ audiences have a holiday movie where the main plot isn't about mining the anxiety and trauma associated with coming out, being closeted and casual homophobia? Then there's the fact that Harper really is just kind of the worst. After pushing Abby back in the closet, Harper ditches her in a town where she doesn't know anyone to go drink with her ex-boyfriend until two in the morning, then proceeds to call Abby "suffocating" when called on it. It's a pattern of s**ty behavior that is pervasive and present throughout the movie, so her redemption arc doesn't feel super genuine. 

Why can't we have main queer characters in Christmas movies without their presence being all about their queerness? We want fluffy festiveness, dammit! They could've made Harper less selfish and more attentive while still playing into the *I'm not out yet Because Reasons so we need to hide our gay relationship* trope, but they didn't. Who knows why, but what a waste. 🎄👩‍❤️‍👩☃️

^ Look at that trailer and tell me you don't expect Misunderstandings with fun and tropey antics + Domestic Christmas Shenanigans + Comfort for Hurt! You will be sorely disappointed. 😞 

NOTE: The flick does have a few good moments. And it's probably worth the watch just to see what's missing/mishandled when it comes to queer characters and queer romances in mainstream movies. 

But it's not really fun or funny or heart-warming - where are the snowball fights? Insightful conversations? Christmas elements like eggnog/spiced wine, candycanes, mistletoe? Where are the many colourful side characters and the hungover brunches? We get one scene of ice-skating for a few minutes and it's wasted on sibling rivalry bs rather than, say.. Abby and Harper skating together but not being aloud to touch—omg the tension!! 😍 

There's just not enough comfort for the hurt Abby (Kstew) goes through; the film wholly lacks those warm-n-fuzzy Christmas vibes; there's just way more wrong with it than is right with it - which sucks, because this had the potential to be such a great movie if only Harper was written as less ignorant/selfish and we'd gotten more enjoyable family interactions and more festive fun - like a celebration in town. Instead we get a few limited shots of the adorable town, a crappy bar, and an OTT fancy Christmas party for performative rich white folk on a career path for power and "perfection" (ie. wholesome family values). 

The story they went with was definitely better suited for a dramatic film, so in a romcom setting it really didn't work. Plus the side-characters were flat; we needed more depth from the supporting characters, more meaningful interactions. 

^ Look at those intro credits!! Look at all the domestic happy moments and tell me you don't want to see a movie filled with such fluffy festive goodness!! Well, if you don't want to see such moments, don't worry because you won't. I naturally thought we were going to get this kind of romantic-and-non-romantic happiness dispersed throughout the entire film, but no. Not a one. There's 5 minutes of Happy Couple at the start, and that's it 📸☹️ (unless you count a photo collage of the happy ending and year that follows stuffed into the end credits). 

BTW: That intro song is the most Christmasy song in the whole movie. The soundtrack features modern pop songs which 1) don't help set the festive vibe and 2) are really fucking annoying; the song choices are grating, not pleasant, not enjoyable, and they overpower the scenes with a whole lotta noise. I really wish we'd gotten more tunes like the one above. 🎶 

About the image below—Abby is actually miserable the entire time, getting worse by the day, barely a smile seen on her.. while Harper is the one schmoozing her family and contacts with teeth bared, so.. this image isn't what you'll get, just fyi:

(also: the only POC actors they had were the perfectionist-stone-faced-bitch's husband and his girlfriend - wife + hubby being secretly separated.) 

The things that the Salon reviewer liked are the same things I did (see below), but imho even those elements weren't enough to save this film from being: 

an infuriating 102 minute-comedy of errors buoyed by a healthy dose of gaslighting 

More cons of the flick are pointed out by denofgeek.com: 

Some of its issues come from the structure of the film, which shoehorns very real queer struggles into wacky rom-com tropes too fluffy to contain the stakes at hand. Meanwhile the choice to have one half of the lead couple be so aggressively and repeatedly cruel—while her high school ex Riley, played by the ever-perfect Aubrey Plaza was standing right there having all the chemistry in the world with the other romantic lead—was a fatal one.

It really was a dramatic plot idea crammed into a fluffy narrative. You can see the conflicting genres fighting to stay alive and they both die a slow, agonisingly dull death throughout the film. The whole *Abby being converted to loving Christmas by Harper inviting her to spend the holidays with her family* thing, only to have Harper force their relationship + Abby into the closet. Straight conversion much? I'm 100% sick of heteronormative bs in my queer Christmas films. 

For the most part, when you're not feeling for Abby's harsh treatment by her would-be fiance and everyone but Riley ignoring her completely, you will be bored af from the lack of festive cheer - not just twinkle lights and boisterous seasonal music, but those good ol' homey family Christmas vibes. With the Harper house + family members, everything's a performance, so that lack of sincerity and warmth makes for a depressing viewing experience: 

^ Jane (one of Harper's 2 sisters) is the only character allowed to be consistently genuine in the narrative (aside from John, but he's restricted mostly to phonecalls, and Riley - but even she's keeping Harper's secrets). Jane is the only character who is naturally vibrant and reminds us of some of the reasons we get excited about Christmas movies: to feel joy and to enjoy the company around us during the holiday season! 🎄☃️🥳 But rather than give us a fun day out with Jane + Abby, we get Abby + the second sister (i don't even remember her name, just BitchFace) which leads to more bad treatment of Abby - this time by two spoiled af no-smile rich kids. *le sigh* Jane carries the spark of honest joy for the entire Harper clan and that is TOO MUCH to expect of one character, let alone a side-character. 😪 

There are so many ways the story could've been tweaked to make more sense and be somewhat enjoyable, including: 

The orphan!Abby thing is just bad. Rather than give Abby a voice, chances to let her personality shine, almost everyone interacts with her to merely briefly express their condolences for her long-dead parents 🙄 

Abby is a pet-minder, ie. she's an animal lover, yet at no point do we see her interact with animals! Not a dog or cat or hamster, no reindeer at the petting zoo, nothing. 🐕🐈🦎🦜🐠

Riley + Abby getting together (even just a kiss) 👄 

Abby + Harper separating so Harper can get her shit together - and then we get several flashforward shots of them separately living their lives (Harper especially), and then meeting back up again - maybe the next holiday season, after some much-needed time apart 🏃‍♀️🤸‍♀️ 

side characters who engage with Abby in a sincere, meaningful way instead of ignoring her (again, we got Riley, but she was outside of the family dynamic) 😊 

MORE FESTIVE CHEER! where were all the staple Christmassy passtimes, the smile-inducing season-specific experiences??? 🎉 

More from denofgeek: 

Where the script gets into trouble is that it doesn’t distinguish between Harper being closeted and her poor treatment of Abby. The two are separate issues and treating them as one does no favors to Harper, nor others struggling with the closet. As Dan Levy’s beautiful monologue late in the movie alludes to, the closet is a safety mechanism—but it’s not a free pass to treat people like garbage. [...] 😟🏳️‍🌈

Even a brief conversation teasing out that being in the closet doesn’t justify how Harper acted, and that plenty of people in the closet don’t treat others like trash, would have been important. Instead once Harper is out (which the movie takes pains to make clear only happened because Harper’s sister Sloane outed her), and a gesture so small it could never credibly be called grand is made, all bad behavior is washed away. [...] 😤🙅‍♀️ 

The jarring underlying issue is that 'Happiest Season' attempts to apply the standard rom-com and made-for-TV-holiday-movie tropes to queer life. So Abby having to go back into the closet isn’t framed as a painful regression or being forced to deny an essential part of herself, but rather a fun twist, in the vein of “but the guy she insulted on the plane is the owner of the ornament factory she has to impress to win the Christmas contest!”🚪😒 

All of Harper’s behavior adds up to making her feel like something the audience wants Abby to be free of, not someone Abby should be fighting for. Once Riley tells Abby about Harper’s cruelty in high school, where Harper outed Riley and mocked her rather than standing up for her or finding an excuse that protected them both, it becomes incredibly difficult to root for the lead couple to get back together, or for Harper at all. 👏💃 

With this information, Harper’s other transgressions go from frustrating to part of a larger pattern. Sadly, it’s a pattern Harper repeats when her sister outs her and she throws Abby under the (lesbian) bus. 🤬 

FAVE THINGS: 

all interactions between John (Dan Levy) + Abby (he's witty, honest, and 100% the most entertaining element of the entire film; i wish we'd gotten more of him) 😆 

Riley (Aubrey Plaza, Harper's ex) + Abby's scenes together because CHEMISTRY, both between the characters and the actors 👩‍❤️‍👩

Notable between Abby + Riley scenes include 3 instances of Riley comforting Abby's hurt: outside at the fancy party (Abby feeling excluded/ignored/not worth anyone's time due to the way they treat her even though they don't know she's gay), at a gay bar in town (sandwiched by scenes where Abby's made to feel like crap by Harper), and at the fancy home Christmas party where Riley gets Abby something stronger to drink after hearing Abby was going to propose to Harper (but it's been a helluva shitty week and those plans are dead) 👭 

Every scene with Riley was blessed relief from the hurt and discomfort and boredom of the rest of the time with Harper's family. 🤩 

Sister Jane, for being a genuinely fun character 🤗 who was written starkly different to her family and treated somewhat like an outcast 

Aubrey + Kstew killin it in various pantsuits 👀 

In contrast, Riley connects Abby to queerness, bringing her to an LGBTQ bar to decompress and enjoy a Christmas-themed drag performance. It’s the most relaxed and comfortable Abby is on screen since the opening scenes, a chance to glimpse Abby’s authentic self before Harper summons her back to heterosexuality, and where she once again ignores and disappoints her. Riley actually talks to Abby at the various holiday parties whereas Harper keeps leaving her to please her family, especially her father. It’s not hard for the natural chemistry between Plaza and Stewart to take over

I wouldn't watch this film again. For a hopeful Christmasy love story I'd just watch all Abby + Riley's scenes: 

In closing, here's a batshit article title from observer.com that just makes you go, huh? 🧐:

‘Happiest Season’ Isn’t Happy, But That Doesn’t Make It a Bad Rom-Com

Um.. yes, yes it does. 

Rom-Coms are supposed to be fun, light-hearted stories about love even when the plot deals with lying - The Proposal, Sweet Home Alabama - so a movie that leaves you hurting more than comforted in sympathy with one of the main characters because the (apparent) love of their life is treating them like shit, then it doesn't deserve to be in the genre of Rom-Com. 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨💞🎬

In summary, Abby and Harper got 5 minutes of happiness in the beginning, and an eventual happy ending after a super rocky middle. The journey was painful and unenjoyable, and it made their happy ending unbelievable and, for Harper, undeserved because of her behaviour through 90% of the story. 

In short: it was not, in fact, the happiest season. 😕👎

#happiest season #review #unhappiest season #queer cinema #queer characters #christmas #lgbtqia #romcom #movies #watchnotes #we deserve better

[snkpolls]

SnK 131 Chapter Poll Results

The chapter poll closed with  2,192 responses. This month’s poll results were brought to you by @momtaku​, /u/staraves, Crunchwrap, u/_Puppet_, Luna.  Thanks as always for your support.

  RATE THE CHAPTER 2,118 responses

This was a standout chapter for the fandom, garnering a positive rating from over 90% of respondents and an average score of 4.68 which makes it the highest rated chapter since 122 - and in the top 5 in the history of the poll! Many of you were eager to express your enjoyment of it, with this question getting the most responses it has since chapter 102 (over two years ago!). As we go deeper into the endgame, it’s good to know enthusiasm is going strong.

Yams is a damn genius. This is one chapter I have not been able to stop thinking about or rereading. It's just... its so fucked up and SO. WELL. DONE.

I really, really loved this chapter. My favourite so far probably.

This is the first time I cried after a chapter. It hit me so hard.

Almost made me quit the manga. We finally got a confession from Armin, but right in the middle of all that grief, I couldn't enjoy it. Poor Ramzi and Halill, and all other innocent people beyond and within the Walls.

This chapter has had a ripple effect on how I’m seeing the series now in retrospect. I’ve been re-reading the manga , & I’ve become very melancholic after the Rumbling , knowing  everything was leading to this.

This was a phenomenal chapter. Thank you Isayama for everything.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT?

2,137 responses

Finding a favorite moment in a tragic chapter isn’t easy but we managed. “Child Eren’s moment of happiness” tops the list with an impressive 30% of respondents. “Seeing the reality of the rumbling” (18.8%), “Eren’s tearful apology to Ramzi” (15.9%) and “Getting Eren’s thoughts on the Rumbling while in Marley” (13.8%) round out the top four.

Very cool to finally see the destruction caused by the rumbling and some more insight into Eren's character

I like that this chapter showed perspectives from both the initiator of the rumbling (Eren) and the victims of his choice. It makes you sympathize with Eren, but at the same time, terrifies you with the price humanity has to pay.

Definitely one of the most depressing, if not the most depressing chapter thus far. Isayama brilliantly handled the transition between Eren's despair and the result of Eren's despair (Rumbling). Beautiful artwork. Great cliffhanger. Definitely a 9/10.

Tragic, Terrifying, Heartbreaking also Awesome because atleast AruAni became somewhat cannon

beautiful art as usual

The freedom scene with kid eren is the most beautiful/horrifying scene of the manga.

I also loved the Annie and Armin talk, anyone who says it's shipping cringe is a child, this was a long time coming and it was executed beautifully. (I also love how Hitch was mentioned twice, she would be proud of Armin this chapter.)

Ramzi and Halil deaths were the saddest part of this chapter, and I don't know about Ymir, but I guess she's helping Eren.

The panel showing the wall titans faces, especially the one shown on the right with empty eye sockets, gave me the chills. Can't wait to see how things will go down between the gang and Eren.

  WHO WAS THIS CHAPTER’S MVP? 2,144 responses

This month giving us the most harrowing chapter in a while made it feel wrong to be looking for an MVP amidst all this despair, and almost half of you agree (47.5%). Just over a quarter of you believe the Eren focus earned him the spot (28.9%), with 9.4% choosing Armin and 9.1% selecting best bros Ramzi and Halil. A distant minority of you chose Annie and Birb, the former of which coming dead last. Poor Annie, you’ll be more popular than a bird one day.

the true mvp was the depression we got along the way

Eren needs a hug

Eren needs to be put down.

I really admire the way Isayama deeply makes you care for a character in a few panels, like he did for those two - relatively unknown - boys.

Annie is the best girl

birbs are the rreak mvp since chap 1

  EIGHT MONTHS AFTER FIRST APPEARING IN THE MEMORY SHARDS, WE GET FEZ-KUN’S STORY.  DID IT LIVE UP TO YOUR EXPECTATIONS? 2,121 responses

Only a month ago, the fandom had no idea what to make of the mysterious Fez-Kun. The plucky pickpocket had a simple but effective story, and knew more secrets than he could possibly have understood. A perfect half of respondents were pleasantly surprised with Fez kid’s part in the story. 41.2% were content as it was about what they expected. 6.2% wanted to see a more in-depth picture but alas, that chance has been crushed mercilessly along with Ramzi’s hopes and dreams (and… the rest of him). 2.5% just weren’t into anything that let Eren lean into some morally black territory. Don’t worry, there are still plenty of grey shades here. Very dark shades of grey.

I didn't expect Ramzy's story to be expanded on, but it's so brutal to see the man he's been talking to killing him, his brother, his family and his hopes.

I know Ramzi and Halil were plot devices, but damn their death hit hard.

I think Eren saving Ramzi is foreshadowing. He knew Ramzi was gonna die in rumbling, yet he saved him. Same will happen, after someone reaching him and reminding him who he is, Eren will stop this madness and die. Or I wanna be hopeful.

even if i'm satisfied with Ramzi's story, I wish there would have been more to it because it is a tiny bit dissapointing but it's more or less what I expected.

Ramzi and Halil didn’t deserve death

i think everybody who dies in this rumbling will get back alive same will happen to halil and ramzi they will come back alive

Ramzi and Halil's deaths were so horrible but so good to see, because this is what it means when you destroy the world. You don't get to pluck out the nice ones and enjoy killing the bad ones. It's the height of cruel selfishness. And no amount of apologies changes that.

Ramzi and Halil deserved so much better

  WHY WAS EREN DISAPPOINTED THAT HUMANITY EXISTED OUTSIDE THE WALLS? 2,117 responses

There’s been disagreement over exactly what Eren meant when he said he was disappointed that humanity existed outside the walls and our poll reflects that. Just over a third of the fandom (34.2%) take Eren’s words literally and believe that his disappointment was with any existence of humanity since it marred his pristine childhood vision. The second most popular option is that he was disappointed in the attitudes, selecting “he was disappointed to discover all of humanity was filled with violence and oppression” (29.5%). We deliberately left off an “All of the above” option but that didn’t stop more than 50 people from writing it in.

He is disappointed at the fact that he has to fight humans with homes, families, pasts and futures and not mindless titans.

It's also a clear contrast between the outside world Armin envisioned and the one Eren wanted. Armin genuinely wanted to know more about it, Eren wanted his worldwide natural park to walk on. When it was full of civilization, he wanted to get rid of it. Like any typical villain wanting to purify the Earth of all the worms infesting it.

When he discovered that humans are just as cruel within the walls as without, it put his entire journey into perspective. He could not be Eren the hero or Eren the explorer and ultimately meant that the sacrifices made by his comrades were negligible in comparison to the big, cruel world , at least in his own mind.

He thought of all the beautiful landscapes and stuff that Armin showed him. Too bad there's these stupid humans in the way. Makes sense to eliminate the entire human population ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Everyone's fight against titans was pointless and the people who caged them could enjoy the things that Eren will never experience. The world is not a uninhabited landscape open to explore it, the world didn't need them and their freedom wasn't a possibility to enjoy it like the others civilizations do.

The world was out there and yet they did NOTHING to help Eldia

yes, eren is disappointed because there are now more enemies. but more than that, he's disappointed that they're not the monsters he's imagined them to be. that he can't kill them without feeling guilt and remorse.

he would never be able to enjoy the freedom he wanted because the clock is ticking and he will have to keep on resisting the whole world till the end without ever having time to properly realize his dream

I think he's disappointed in the fact that he's feeling sorry for humanity outside the walls just like Reiner used to feel sorry about people inside the walls. When he discovered Reiner was a traitor, he especially hated that part of his behavior, and how he realizes they're not that different, and in any case he's worse because at least Reiner had his child soldier brainwashing as an excuse

His disappointment is as bad as it sounds, having to deal with humans outside the walls was too bothersome for him and when the option to wipe them out was available to him, he was more inclined to take it, instead of fight for another resolution.

Typical privileged White boy outraged by prejudice and hatred OUTSIDE the walls, as if that didn't exist in Paradis already.

Any hopeful expectation Eren had of the outside world were completely decimated. Not only did he discover that humanity hadn't perished, but they actively contributed to or blissfully ignored Paradis' hell. In addition, the outside world is exploiting one other for resources. Paradis’ synthetically concocted hell is just part of a game to the outside world (there’s some uncomfortable real-world allusions here and I think it’s important that it’s being explored). Eren thought he was the saviour of humanity only to discover everything's he's done was for naught, humanity's the problem in his eyes.

  WHAT DO YOU THINK OF EREN’S CONTRADICTORY NATURE? 2,106 responses

Deciding to crush the vast majority of the world and its citizens kind of takes a mental toll on people. Who knew? 48% of respondents think Eren’s emotional breakdown side by side with determination to reach freedom at any cost is simply him deciding the results will be worth his immense guilt. 23.2% think it’s a very human case of cognitive dissonance, and that Eren’s just trying to juggle his conflicting values. 19.2% believe his mental state is fraying at the seams reminiscent of the way Reiner’s did. 6.8% don’t buy that there’s any contradiction being shown here.

He was willing to throw away his humanity to become the monster that brings change

He's being a hypocrite. His guilt doesn't hold any value because it's entirely his choice. He's apologizing because there's no greater good, just his selfish dream.

He's never been okay, it's just that we're finally seeing him for who he is without the "protagonist illusion".

I don't think it's contradictory though. He's grieving sure, but he's also going along with his plan. Because he wants to be free.

He's not mentally stable and it shows

He's to some extent influenced by the Shingeki and/or its previous holders

He's trying to convince himself that humanity is evil sl he won't feel guilty about what he's doing

Hes a fully grown adult who knows better, no matter how bad he feels he doesnt deserve sympathy

The future cannot be changed and Eren is a slave to the attack titan's objective to push foreward

This chapter shows a lot of parallel between Eren and Reiner, he even said himself that he's worse than Reiner in the genocide that he's created. says himself that

What a fucking asshole

When Eren saw the future he knew the rumbling was inevitable so he is the one having to carry to burden of being ‘humanity’s enemy’ whether or not it was Eren to fulfill the rumbling it would’ve happened either way so he isn’t immediately a devil

Erens nature isn’t contradictory. He’s just now becoming self aware of the impact of his violent nature

He feels guilty about his actions and feels sorry for people who are going to be killed, but on the other hand - he is selfish and will do everything to reach his perfect reality.

Humans are an amalgamation of their actions. They sometimes arrive at destinations they did not fully intend. They may also realize too late that the path that they’ve set down is leading them in a direction they are not happy with, but eren is too far gone. He’s sane, understands he is objectively evil, but cannot turn back.

He totally snapped and turned into the psychopath that was sleeping inside of him for a long time. It was indeed very dangerous to entrust him with more power than he can handle.

Isayama did the same thing with Zeke. I think he likes the idea of the cool, mysterious guy, but it falls flat when the motivation doesn’t line up & the characters turn out to be crying & weak to fit the narrative once it’s revealed.

I don't know how to word this, but he is caged in his own vision to the point where any human decency and the ability to think is killed. Only a selfish, hateful and childish shell remained that is throwing a tantrum over his childbook fairytale not being true. It's not the same as Reiner, because Eren chose this. He wanted this, it is his fault. He had the power to stop this, but didn't. He can apologize as much as he wants, but he isn't feeling sorry at all.

He feels guilty, which is why he is having a mental breakdown like Reiner.

He’s having a mental breakdown but it's worse than Reiner's

painfully obvious this chapter was just Eren trying by all means to justify the Rumbling. Not because of some noble intention or cornering them into the inevitable, but just because he wanted to erase the world.

the eren reiner parallels man.. they never stop

  IN HIS FINAL MOMENTS, RAMZI SEES AN APPARITION OF YMIR. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? 2,104 responses

Ymir has finally appeared since we last saw her in chapter 122, and her presence as well as motivations are seemingly shrouded in mystery. Over a third believe she is watching everything but not necessarily feeling good or bad about it (32.1%), and some of you think she may be questioning her decision (16.2%). A minority of you opted to choose that her appearance means she is enjoying seeing it unfold (9.6%), or that we are witnessing a phenomenon related to titan deaths that have occurred all this time (7.5%). The most popular choice, however, (34.6%) is simply expressing bewilderment at the Evangelion-esque shenanigans we’re seeing.

Ymir could be the one doing all the actions of destruction since Eren let her free.

i really think after ymir appeared again even tho eren freed her that she's regretting giving him the founder's power and will have a role is taking him down

the presence of Ymir intrigues me and I hope that in the next chapter we will have her point of view.

I think Ymir is the one who's been pulling the ropes for a long time. Whenever Eren thinks there might be another way (especially throught he disappearance of the Eldian race) he compulsively thinks that he just CAN'T accept that, like there's a force driving him towards seeking freedom.

I hope that Ymir appearance means that she is counting and seeing Eren victims so she can create them Again without Eldian hate

Ymir being outside, and Kid Eren appearing in the paths might have a connection. Ymir was a grownup when she was killed but inside the paths she was shown a kid. Same as Eren being shown in the paths. This might signifies Eren is not in control of the situation but Ymir is.

I have had theories for a while about Ymir possibly turning on Eren, whether this is to save the world to show she is better than Eren, or to bring Paradis to destruction as well to show she is just as bad.

WHAT IN THE EVA?

Loved the Evangelion reference. YAMS YOU MADLAD!

Ymir might be the true enemy

WHAT THE FUCK IS YMIR AYANAMI DOING THERE?  

  WHAT IS KID EREN DOING HERE? 2,099 responses

Child Eren appears in one of the most stunning panels of the chapter, but what does it mean?  Two options came out on top, with the idea that Eren is mentally regressing to a child (37.9%) edging out that it’s symbolism comparing child Eren to current Eren (36.1%).

I think we are going to see different Eren during the rumble, the past with Eren as a child, the future perhaps with a more mature or elderly Eren and the Eren of the present.

Adult Eren is incapacitated and Kid eren took his place through paths, will wake up for the "see you later, Eren"

Adult Eren unknowingly brought kid Eren’s consciousness to the present while he was sleeping under the tree. This is part of his “dream” that he had at the beginning of the story.

It is symbolises Erens mentality as a kid and how his flawed ideology doesn't hold up to the real world he faced outside of the walls. Also to cope.

Eren is the only character who cannot overcome the cycle of violence, so he will die.As you know, only without people can you become absolutely free, so he enjoys it when he realizes that nothing else binds him.

He has taken over paths from ymir, but since he is not bound by anything, he can do whatever the hell he wants, and is the reason he connected to armin while speaking to him.

It shows that Eren is not fully in control of the PATHS. For example in this scene, he remembers Armin because of his memory as a child talking about freedom with Armin then Armin suddenly appears although Eren himself didn't wish for something like that to happen thus it's just to show that PATHS connecting all Subjects of Ymir even in different timeline.

This links in with Floch... Eren loves Floch.

He was dreaming about the past and accidentally used the power of the Founder to show his younger self a vision of the Attack Titan's current point of view.

He's a sociopathic freak

It is symbolic of his old dream that he will have to give up on soon.

Can I say all of the above again? I saw it as a representation of Eren in his most pure, idealistic state which is then contrasted by the realistic horror of the destruction he is causing.

Brought into the present by adult Eren to give his younger self a taste of freedom without all the guilt. This is the beginning of the long dream kid Eren awakes from in Chapter 1.

Child Eren's Evangelion/Devilman(Crybaby)-esque "elation" seems like a metaphorical emotional release (and P A T H S shenanigans).

Something about the kid-Eren “freedom” scene is just so incredible and impactful; fully restored my faith that Isayama will deliver an amazing finale for this masterpiece.

THE MORE I LOOK AT THIS PANEL THE MORE MY HEART HURTS. ITS SO BEAUTIFUL YET SO DAMN FUCKED UP. GOD. FRICK. FRIIIICKKKKKK

  KID EREN FINALLY WITNESSES “THAT SIGHT”, BUT WHAT DID HE ACTUALLY SEE? 2,113 responses

The world-shattering reveal almost a year ago of Eren gaining an important glimpse into the future, characterised as “that sight”, was finally answered in this chapter -- or was it? The majority of you believe kid Eren was merely enjoying the view from above that filled him with freedom, blissfully ignorant to the carnage of the rumbling (50.8%). Close to a quarter (23.8%) think he was able to see the rumbling but was enjoying the freedom in spite of it, with a small portion (5%) believing all the death was a part of his glee. Some aren’t yet sold on the idea that this is “that sight”, perhaps believing we will see it later (20.4%).

I don't think that his inner child is aware of the rumbling. He is only focused on the scenery and wants Armin to see that too.

A world without any walls is what kid eren always wanted to see. Through paths, kid eren achieved this (without seeing the death)

  HOW WILL ARMIN BEING ABLE TO SEE KID EREN THROUGH PATHS AFFECT THE PLOT? 2,114 responses

Child Eren showing up was confusing enough, but he had to see Armin through paths too!?  What does it mean!?  A majority, at 55.5% think it foreshadows Armin’s coming importance in whatever the endgame turns out to be. Almost a third, at 28.6% think that it also opens up the possibility for other characters to connect with Eren through paths.

Armin was the person Eren has been sharing his dreams with. He is mentally showing his friend that the realisation of their dreams is finally at hand.

Eren can call forth anyone he wants, but if he doesn't want to see them I'm not sure if they could get to him

It foreshadows Armin and Eren clashing on a deeper level. I don't think anyone can actually stop Eren at this point.

Eren is so suped up with in this final form and with Ymir's "support" that when he thought about Armin it created a link through the paths.

Armin gets to briefly see the old "idealistic" Eren again. The one he can somewhat see eye-to-eye with and incidentally "created".

I think it might be just a visual metaphor on how Armin and Eren never really understood each other while sharing the same dream and that Armin is realizing that (I mean that the dream of "seeing the outside world" didn't mean the same thing to them). Or it might be that Eren is in a comatose sort of state and that since he technically is in control of paths, his thoughts are "sent" to Armin since he's reflecting on their shared dream

It shows Eren and Armin both want the same end goal. Though they disagree on the means of getting to it

The world is not like the one he saw in Armin's book. Hence why he contacted him, this is his way of reaching for his vision of freedom that he was denied because of the trauma of the wall.

Reference to the ocean scene where Eren was depressed and Armin excited, now its reversed

  WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ARMIN AND ANNIE’S TALK ON THE SHIP? 2,124 responses

While this tiny moment of apparent romance was a delight for the 20% of the fandom who expressed “Whoo hoo Aruani is canon!!”, the remaining 80% were slightly more subdued in their reaction. The largest percentage (35.3%) was happy that the build up between their characters had some payoff. The second most popular selection had nothing to do with Armin or Annie at all with “I just wanna know what’s up with the birds” garnering 26% of the vote. Lastly, 11.2% felt like this moment was completely out of place, selecting “Now’s not the time for love drama Isayama.”

We better see Armin and Annie kiss next chapter

The Armin/Annie was not that necessary, I’d loved way more a more "group" discussion with Mikasa, Jean n Reiner in it. Old 104th days style

Besides the shipping moment, Annie just came to terms with that she’s still not alone, which is huge for her character

I'm not sure if Isayama knows how unnatural aruani is. These two had a grand total of 3 interactions, and sparing each other still isn't prone to romantic feelings blooming on either side.

a bad fking attempt by isayama at romance, should have stuck with eren historia love child

The aruani was unexpected but nice xD I don't exactly ship them but they are cute in this chapter(I can't help but feel one of them is getting a death flag because of this though💀)

What about them talking about all the shit she did or has been through? I wanted to see that.

SHE'S NOT TAKING MY MAN ISTG SHE'S NOT ON MY WATCH

Ship and let ship, this is actually a very intresting pairing and I think the scene flowed very naturally. But I still hope that in the future manga focuses more in the plot and not in the ships. I'd hope the same from fandom, but of course that's too much to ask...

This was a nice moment away from death and destruction

They’re definitely gonna die soon

am i the only one who don’t ship annie and armin? like bro... she squashed your little friends like bugs

Yoo bitch AruAni is canon LETSS FUCKING GOOO Love this cinnamon couple..More canon couple please Yams!

CANT BELIEVE ARMIN IS TRYING TO GET A GF WHEN MILLIONS R DYING HES FR A HOE🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

I only saw Bertolt there.

Maybe it's just me but i dont see anything romantic about the scene to me i prefer the weird friendship they have

While it seemed slightly out of place I’m glad Isayama touched on their “therapy sessions”.

Oh God no please don’t do this, Annie isn’t they type of character that needs any sort of romance in her story to be happy

Both aruani is canon 🥳 and wtf Isayama not the time…

c'mon falling for an enemy uncounscious girl with whom you have wangsty once-sided talks, a girl you manipulated to capture and used as a bait against enemies, really ???

They’re finally talking, I’ve been waiting so long for them to talk things out, also I really like Annie’s character development! And finally CANON, I’ve been waiting for sooooo long!!!!!!

I selected the bird because I feel threatened by it but also WOO HOO ARUANI IS CANON

I really enjoyed the scene between Annie and Armin. I think it further cements AOT as a very human narrative. They both know there are bigger things going on, but that doesn't allow them to turn off their very human emotions, which come out in a moment of rest. I don't believe this will necessarily lead to more romantic scenes between them, unless the ending of the story is far more hopeful than I expect it to be.

  WHY DO YOU THINK EREN APPEARS TO BE IN A SLEEP-LIKE STATE? 2,088 responses

Not long after his grand arrival on the shore, Eren seems to be having a little nap. 45.3% of respondents think he’s relying on his base instincts for his walk around the world. 15.8% think he’s wide awake but just trying to ignore the squishy things he’s stepping on. Turns out it’s actually pretty tiring to declare war on the world, or so say 14.2% of you. 12.1% think it’s no coincidence his apparently sleepy face was shown right after the intense stare of birb, and 8.8% think that the image hints at a secret puppet master pulling Eren’s strings. We received a lot of comments suggesting Ymir might be the big bad after all - now how is Eren gonna earn that sweet sweet freedom if he’s not willing to bust a few billion skulls, eh?

He left the Attack Titan on auto-mode

i just wish to know that....now that Eren has a long ass neck.....will he come back as a human or....he will be like this forever

Symbolic of the fact that he isn’t really seeing the sight. It’s a fools errand like Eren’s goal.

I think it is symbolic. The 'adult' in him is sleeping while the 'child' in him is taking the reigns.

His consciousness has been transferred to his titan's brain. He's essentially an Attack Titan battery .

He is dreaming, ignorant to the destruction below and seeing the freedom he envisioned as a kid.

his consciousness is in PATHS dimension and he's controlling things from there

How the fuck is he sleeping when the wall titans are executing complex commands, like diving under ships and surrounding the city?

I don't think he is sleeping. He rather looks beaten and devastated and just numb to what he is doing in order to cope.

I figure that bc he's so big, he kind of has to be like this. Normally when he's in his titan with his eyes open, he's being active. I think that although he's set the titans in motion, he's in a more passive role now. He also can't be all that active when he's that huge, right?

I honestly don't know. I can speculate its connection to Ymir's apparition and child Eren's lucid dream?

He's irrevocably fucked thanks to good old Gabi and her rifle.

He's losing his will to live.  Also leaves an opening for Armin to wake him up like he did in Trost.

HE'S THE SLAVE NOW

Maybe he is actively controlling / managing something else at the time? Maybe something crucial we don't know about yet, I don't believe that he is just exhausted.

His adult self is asleep now because his child self is having fun in his perfect world. Eren is mentally weak as adult but his inner child is strong and is reaching everything Eren always wanted - freedom and happiness.

He’s unable to regenerate due to controlling all the colossal titans, or just won’t because he wasn’t in Titan form when his head was blown off, meaning he will eventually die

i feel as if having eren not be in control would be mildly disappointing because the manga has done so much to set up erens decent into madness and how his actions became so extreme, i would be disappointed if all of that went to waste.

I would guess that Eren might be sifting through future memories at the moment. Looking at the "unknown world"/"the scenery" that made him smile wistfully instead of being horrified/the thing "beyond hell" Eren mentioned to Falco.  

His adult self is sleeping now, while his young self is having fun.

I think hes not fully in control (maybe ymir calling the shots)

I'm kinda torn between him operating on base instincts and him being controlled by someone (Ymir?) so I'm gonna go with both as the possibility.

Maybe he really doesn't want this? I think Ymir's the one in control

Ymir is controlling him

He is not the one driving this titan, Ymir is.

Really? You talk about his eyes being closed and not the fact that he has the neck structure of a turkey!?

  THE FINAL PAGE ENDS ON ARMIN’S HOPEFUL WISH FOR THE EXISTENCE OF THE OUTSIDE WORLD HE ENVISIONED AS A CHILD, BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK? 2,101 responses

Despite the darkness this chapter brought to the story, Armin ends on a hopeful note. The top two options were 36.8% thinking there’s a possibility Armin will in fact be able to stop Eren. and 33.7% believe Armin to be too optimistic, and that it won’t pan out the way he wishes.

Armin's recalling of his childhood dream with Eren in the last page made me think there's still a hidden solution to resolve the dilemma.  

This chapter also shown Armin not wanting to give up with reconciling the Eren he wanted to see and the actual Eren. He hears no evil.

Tragic ending, yes, but I don't think Armin's hope is misplaced all the same. I think Eren cannot be stopped without death, but I also don't think the entire world will be destroyed, and I don't think it will end hopelessly.

Either Armin’s gonna save humanity or everybody just dies the end 😹

That one bird that was perched on the ship might be the symbol of peace. But I'm not sure how that peace is going to be achieved if the option's still on the table.

I hope the alliance is able to save Eren from doing this unthinkable sin.

Probably a blossoming hope through Armin breaking Eren from Ymir's plan uwu

I think Armin could join/support Eren

  THIS CHAPTER CONTINUED THE BIRD MOTIF, THIS TIME HAVING A FOCUS ON SCENES ENDING WITH A BIRD STARING DIRECTLY AT A CHARACTER. WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?! 2,067 responses

The Spy Birds theory seemed a bit nutty last month, but I don’t trust that seagull one bit. And it looks like many of you agree because that nutty theory has gone mainstream! The majority of respondents (54.1%) think that the birds are under the influence of a higher power, mainly that of Eren (27.4%) or Ymir (26.7%). 26.6% don’t think the birds are suspicious, they’re just free, man. 13% just reckon Isayama has moved on from his love of drawing thicc horses, and birds are the cool new animal. No complaints here. But I still don’t trust that seagull.

The birds are up to something

Animals sense danger coming from nature before humans do.

bird is symbol for freedom, but some bird like crow and raven in some culture are symbol for death.

I think that pigeons are watching me through P A T H S

Black birds symbolize the people's doom , white bird that flew to armin symbolises hope

black birds: death ; seagul: garbage :))) I dunno, the seagul was so random. It means they are approaching the shore?

EREN IS BRAN STARK IN AOT UNIVERSE LET'S GOO

I dont sure its eren or ymir. But i hope there is something about bird. I hope there are a huge plot twist

Might be another Odin parallel if Eren is using them, but I don't really see why he'd bother. I don't think he needs to do recon.

FREEEEEEEDOOOOOM

Last time I thought that the bird theory was a little far-fetched but now I think that's 100% the deal. That seagul is just somehow way too focused on to be just a random animal.

I commented in the previous poll that the birds are surveillance cameras and i’m even more convinced now. And isn’t it poetic that the Wings of Freedom logo is made up of a pair of black and white wings, representing the different interpretations of freedom pursued by Eren and Armin.

This is all just a Genjutsu by Itachi

my personal favorite theory, it’s zeke seeing everything transpire through the power of the beast titan

Pure!Boy Armin gets the seagull because he still has DREAMS and Eren gets crows because he wants to feast on human flesh.

WHAT'S UPP WITH THE BIRDS AAAAAAHHH TELL ME

I don't know but is really cool if you see it as a symbol of hope/freedom. Birds are the only kind who will not going to be tumble over the rumbling.

I think it's about the colors, black is dark, just like the destruction Eren is causing to the world (including Ramzi and Halil) and white is bright, just like the peace that Armin wished for and is aiming to achieve with the alliance

  HOW DID THIS CHAPTER AFFECT YOUR VIEWS ON THE RUMBLING? 2,100 responses

If we thought seeing the reality of the rumbling would be a game changer when it comes to our view of it, we were wrong. Only 5% of people who formerly supported it no longer do. For the rest of us 44% do not support the rumbling and 30% do. Most curiously, 21% claim to have no opinion. More on that below when we mirrored this question about our views on Eren.

I still don't support The Rumbling, I just want it to stop. It doesn't do anything good for anyone, even Eren himself, and this awfully awesome chapter proves it. I totally expect that via P A T H S.FM Armin and Mikasa could stop him (and save him, physical or psychologically, idk) . It's the only plausible way.

I think the rumbling is justified but I don’t think the civilians who had nothing against Erin don’t deserve to die.

I don’t think there is any other solution, and that’s the point… His outburst at Hange tells me that he was desperate for something. This is coming from Eren who can essentially see everything and inherited multiple people’s memories. If he couldn’t come up with it, I don’t think anyone else can (aside from Armin? But I’m not holding my breath). The 50-year plan was a delusional fantasy at best, technology would evolve rapidly and nullify any threat the Rumbling poses.

I was still kind of hoping Eren had something up his sleeve that wasn't mass slaughter, but I guess we're going there

I believe the full rumbling is a morally grey decision, but I’ll concede and say it’s on the darker end of the spectrum. ultimately eren will have to answer for what he’s done, necessary or not killing millions of innocent people is a horrible thing to do.

The world was never peaceful, and never will be. The Rumbling was inevitable, nothing could stop that.

  ON A SCALE FROM “IT’S JUST A FLESH WOUND” TO “HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWFUL”, HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT THE PORTRAYAL OF THE RUMBLING?   2,110 responses

This probably didn’t need to be asked but we did it anyway. For the vast majority of us, the portrayal of the rumbling was overwhelming in terms of sheer horror. “It’s awful! I love it!” seems to be a common reaction.

Whelp... we wanted to see the rumbling. I guess be careful what we wish for.

I am once again reminded how gory SnK can be.

No holds barred. This is the sad, traumatic truth that we asked for.

RIP in pieces Clown-kun

At this point, it makes me sick to read pro-rumbling posts. Normally, when you like a villain or a morally grey character (Eren went past this point long ago) you enjoy seeing how their mentality works. And this is fully respectable, but not the "uuuh my baby did nothing wrong". If we did the same with our kings Floch and Zeke, it would be crazy, wouldn't it?

I’m glad the Rumbiling was shown in its full glory. It didn’t hide anything about the situation and was very gory. I’m glad we were shown what happened to the people during it, and not just after.

I can't feel engaged in the rumbling when it has been the default scenario since the sea, but more specifically 123. The boy had a death flag the size of Marley and now he's dead. Thanks for the shock, Yams. I'm interested in the potential of everything else. I hope I didn't follow this story for the final conflict to be whether to save more people or less people

It was great to see the Rumbling in its full gore. Isayama showed it masterfully and rly put emphasis on how terrifying and disturbing it is. I was never anti or pro of it before, bc I'm just enjoying the view as the reader, that didn't change, and I still like Eren bc he is a very entertaining character.

I loved seeing how awful everything was. Ofc in real life I wouldn't support it, but narratively? Wow!

  WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING BEST DESCRIBE YOUR FEELINGS ABOUT THE RUMBLING? (MULTISELECT) 2,109 responses

This chapter didn’t hold back in its brutal display of the rumbling, and it may be difficult to find the words to describe it, so we gave you twelve. A clear majority are able to agree on it being both tragic and terrifying, closely followed by those who would describe it as unavoidable, distressing or immoral. The choices in the minority included describing the rumbling as awesome, justified or heroic. Fun fact, over a third of the people who chose “heroic” also described it as some combination of “excessive”, “immoral” and “indefensible”. Talk about mixed feelings.

  HOW DID THIS CHAPTER AFFECT YOUR VIEWS ON EREN? 2,093 responses

If we thought seeing the horrors of the rumbling would be a game changer when it comes to our view of the person who unleashed it, we were wrong. This chapter did nothing to change the minds of the 40% who support Eren and the 30% who do not. Only a minority (8.3%) said this chapter made their support for Eren wane.

We were most curious about the 20% who selected “I have no opinion.” When we’ve waited so eagerly for Eren’s POV, how could a quarter of the fandom be neutral on how it affected them? Was this a failure on Isayama’s part or were our poll options poorly worded? We decided that rather than having no opinion,  “I don’t know what to think yet” might have been the better cop out...err I mean *neutral* option :P

I was one of those that was convinced that there had to be something more to the Rumbling, and this chapter shocked me to my core by revealing that there really isn't. Eren is just that disturbed. We wanted Eren POV but we weren't ready for it. Now I just want to see how Armin and Mikasa end this.

i love eren so much nothing can make me hate him but he is insane... all this and for what. THEY COULDNT HAVE TALKED IT OUT??? i feel so bad for eren he clearly does not want to kill all those people man...

We finally have Eren's pov now; I still don't know how to feel about it, but I'll always support him.

Eren is a character who really disgusts me because of his fucked up delusion of fReEdoM but I love him at the same time because he's really well written, this boy is a fascinating mess.

This chapter seems to have made things pretty straightforward. Eren is a lot of things but he’s not one to go back on his word. He said he was gonna rumble and now he’s doing it.  Not sure why people are having a hard issue saying he wouldn’t have done it. Uhhhh hello he’s nuts

i get eren's side but i just wish that there was another way to bring freedom and justice without genocide

I support eren as a character, however if his actions were translated to real life I would disagree with them. At the end of the day, genocide is not ok. He could’ve wiped out military bases, but civilian deaths is not ok. HOWEVER, for the sake of fiction, & the fact that there’s no decent alternative, it’s team Yeager.

Deep down his choice is selfish and this is why he is ashamed of it, the rest are just justifications. And he is not the only character who has selfish objectives hidden over good intentions, Erwin fought for humanity, but deep down he wanted to prove his father right, and Reiner on his quest to "Save Humanity" was just a mask to become a hero.

Really I want to see Eren fufill his dream, I’m still supporting him.

Ymir might have a role to play in his mental state.

Not to support the rumbling or anything, but I do feel sorry for Eren. He's like a cornered animal that attacked in panic and that attack's freaking deadly.

Even though the rumbling is tragic, this is Eren truly getting his way, no matter what. It's a rare thing to see in any literary work, and although I'm curious as to what the downfall/tragedy of his character will end up being after this, I love it all because for what feels like the first time, a character with bad intent is using the god power to accomplish their goal, and I can't get enough of it.

  WHAT BEST DESCRIBES YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT EREN THIS CHAPTER 2,111 responses

Empathy for Eren is the theme for nearly 70% of the fandom with “I feel for him. He’s in a tough position” (43.7%) and “my heart aches for him” (22.1%) being the top two selections. On the opposite and more extreme ends of the spectrum, those who think he’s the greatest (15.1%) and those who think he’s the worst (14.9%) are nearly evenly matched. Interestingly only 4.2% expressed “I have no opinion” on this question compared to more than 20% on the question above.

Eren is my favorite character but I also don't support his actions.

I was disstressed for a few days after it.  How did it go to this? I kept reading this far just because I wanted Eren to be happy and have his happy ending, and what do we have now?..

I feel bad for eren, he's in a position no one would want to be, and he hates what hes doing no matter how much he needs to

This chapter could possibly stablish once and for all Eren as a unchangable character since he has reached a point of no return.

Eren is GOAT, the rumbling is wrong but I still love eren

This entire chapter just reaffirms the fact that Eren has always been a self absorbed, self-pitying child from the very beginning

I don't get how people can still support Eren just because he cried a little.

To think that all the shit that has happened since RTS (Sasha killed, Liberio attacked, Tybur murdered, Zackley assassinated, Nile and Pixis titanised, Levi forced to decimate his own titanised squad and then nearly dying, Jaegerist coup, Shadis beat up, Historia pregnant AND ANYTHING ELSE I'VE FORGOTTEN) is all because of some long, convoluted plan for one single boy's childish, problematically simplistic, black-and-white dream for "Freedom" is. I can't. I'm tired. Eren's pov is so outrageously outlandish that I can't relate. At all.

I cant feel bad for Eren, he is the only person responsible on his guilt and sadness. Also genocide is the worst option and even Eren says it.

He was sheltered his whole life; he has no proper context or framework for concepts like racism and war between humans. He “optimistically” thought his fight was that of human vs titan. That's why I don't blame him for coming to the Rumbling conclusion after the basement reveal. I give him a lot of credit for empathizing with "the other side" and I do believe Eren tried his best to come up with alternative solutions.

I feel for Eren, he was sold the idea of a perfect, peaceful, untouched world, ripe for discovery, filled with the beauty and awe of nature, but in reality it was full of cruel xenophobia people who hated his very existance. I don't support the rumbling but i understand why Eren did it.

Eren is obsessed with his perfect vision of "Freedom" where there are no limits to his will, but sadly for him, he lives on a reality where others exist and as long he has to interact with them, there are going to be limitations he is going to be bound. So even if he kills everyone outside the island, there is going to be another "wall" he needs to overcome.  

Seeing Eren cry and hear his doubts actually made me just more angry with him: "If you are so sad about the fate of the outside world then fucking change the future, don't just give up!!!!!!!" He seems to be very clung in the idea that the future is set and there is nothing he can do to change it.

Okay but look at Eren's centipedal Hell's creation's TINY BUTT. It's so funny seeing that little boney ass on this gigantic thing

  EREN SEEMS TO HAVE MANY MOTIVATIONS. HOW WOULD YOU RANK THEM?

This one was interesting. With this chapter’s iconic imagery of kid Eren spreading his arms declaring “this is freedom”, it’s unsurprising that most of us agree with that as a very important motivation for him. His friends were also chosen as a very important motivation, though not as much as his love for freedom. Historia and her child just edged out the motivation of the people of Paradis, though interestingly it has less “somewhat important” votes and more “not important at all votes”, making it clearly divisive even if it has more “very important” votes.. But the motivation with an even more divisive perception is revenge, with nearly an even split between those who view it as very, somewhat and not important at all.  

Everything Eren is doing is for the sake of his friends and Historia, there was no other choice to protect the island.

I think that the only thing what matters to Eren is freedom and reaching the perfect world he saw in his dreams after reading Armin's book. The dream of his inner child is playing the most important role in his life. Eren is ready to sacrifice his friends, his mentors and people on Paradis - just to see the special scenery and finally feel FREE.

Feel sad to see eren need to do all of this, but i know its for his friend and paradis

I hope that Eren doesn’t harm the alliance

  REGARDLESS OF WHETHER YOU FEEL POSITIVELY OR NEGATIVELY ABOUT EREN, DO YOU THINK HE IS BEING PORTRAYED AS A VILLAIN AT THIS POINT IN THE STORY? 2,098 responses

It’s truly a testament to Isayama’s strength as a writer when a character’s deliberate annihilation of billions is met with a majority response of “there are no villains or heroes here.” 57.1% think that as tragic as the situation now may be, nobody in this manga really qualifies as villainous. Or at least, not when our feisty protagonist is involved. 33.7% think the manga is a tale of a hopeful boy slowly turning to the dark side. 5.6% see this all as part of a hero’s tumultuous journey. Finally, 3.5% think it’s unfair to cast Eren as a villain since he’s not the one in control. Gotta say, if Eren is not the one destroying the world he really shouldn’t have said he was going to destroy the world.

This chapter just proves that Eren ISN'T a complete villain. I disagree with the rumbling, but what Eren's going through is something that I empathize with.This chapter just made it easier for me to keep rooting for everyone, even though a completely happy ending is not an option anymore.

I really hope Eren's in for a change of heart soon. I hate the idea of him being the final villain. He's definitely redeemable. Even he is eligible to have a dark foil and rival. Maybe we'll get that later on in Zeke who I feel is also redeemable.

More and more of the story is unveiled, I really like how this is going. Ever since knowing the outside world I have decided that Eren is no longer a hero but then he is not a villain either so does everyone in the story. I like Eren a lot but I'd say that I just like to observe, to see, never to support or to oppose. So this chapter is really amazing to me as I managed to see more about Eren.

eren is a villian whether you like it or not

I feel Walter white Vibe from Eren.

Eren is evil period!!!! There is no justification for mass murder. If he wants to savr his ppl then just wipe out the army, navy, air force, warriors and the leaders period not everyone including INNOCENT ppl....

EREN IS GOAT. He is portrayed as a hero who makes tough choices that no other shitty shonen character even can do.

Eren needs to stop the rumbling. It maybe justified his needs but the people outside the walls didn't deserved it. They're both each other's enemies. He used to say people outside the walls are monsters but he became one himself. He desired freedom but in the end he was a slave to his own desire.

Isayama could chose to make him some what of a villainous character, or he could chose to set it up as if eren is more of an anti hero doing then wrong things for the right reasons

  DESCRIBE THE CHAPTER IN ONE WORD 1,543 responses

No superlatives to describe how great or awesome this chapter was this month. The Rumbling hurt us all (well done, Yams, mission accomplished). That being said, it looks like we’re all masochists, considering this chapter is in the top 5 highest rated chapters since chapter 91.

Tragic [169; 4.69]

Sad [89; 4.73]

Pain [77; 4.86]

Depressing [69; 4.75]

Heartbreaking [48; 4.77]

  WHAT ARE YOU MOST HOPING TO SEE NEXT CHAPTER? 2,089 responses

With what we want next chapter we find it especially surprising that the majority are ready to give Eren’s perspective a break. Since google sometimes fails us in displaying the data, we’ll just list it all out. Of the options we provided, our wishes for next chapter from most to least popular are: Let’s keep it with the Eren POV (23.4%), The alliance reaching Odiha (22.4%), WHERE TF IS LEVI??? (10.6%), I could go for a few more mental breakdowns (10.1%), More Ymir being mysterious (7.9%), WHERE TF IS LEVI??? (10.6%), SAVE US ZEKE (8.9%), Oh god go back to Historia please (8.5%), Finality for Floch (6%) and More birbs ovo (2.2%)

Yo where tf is Rico

I want to see levi

fuck yeah more mental break down, I'm ready to be depressed

I really want to see more of Armin and kid Eren in Paths next chapter. That one panel was super interesting and I would love to go back to it.

hurt me more isayama

Please yams I want to see Flochad kill Hange, that’s all I ask for.

Zeke returns next chapter pleaseeeee

HOPE WE GET TO SEE HOW THE ISLAND IS DOING NEXT CHAPTER

It's getting to the final and I don't like that

as only 3-4 chapters are left, I dont think we are going to get another eren POV, I am still dying to see the conditions of the other main characters, whereas zeke and floch are unfinished mysteries.

someone from alliance is dying soon

I've gotta see more Historia. What is she doing and thinking right now? What is her role moving forward?

Just shut up with historia in this survey. She's irrelevant. Now I hate answering your polls.Never again!

i literally don't know what to expect next chapter like yams is just THAT good

  WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 2,025 responses

The platforms where we discuss the series remain relatively unchanged with Reddit providing the plurality of responses. Thank you Reddit! We appreciate it. That said, we’d love to see this chart balance out a little more so please feel free to share the poll wherever you discuss the series. That includes the 5 of you degenerates on Snapchat.

  ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE CHAPTER? 553 responses

Uhhh *disappears*

ZEKE-KUN PLEASE BE A GOOD ONII-CHAN AND SAVE THE WORLD FROM YOUR TROUBLED LITTLE OTOTO

listen, birds are pretty cool ok

Beautifully tragic, exactly what I wanted to see from Eren after being shown in a villainous light for 30+ chapters. Being introduced to a new character, in particular an innocent child and then finally revealing his name and story was a perfect way to show the true horrors of an indiscriminate near-omnicide, it definitely brought tears to my eyes.

(😢) SIE SIND DAS ESSEN UND WIR SIND DIE JAEGER (😢)

As expected of Isayama-sensei, it's exactly right.

Annie being revealed as aromantic is the unexpected happy development in this tragedy.

Kiddos, the "it's just fiction" argument refers to the fact that you are allowed to *enjoy* watching fucked up things in fiction because people, in general, can distinguish between fiction and reality. It does not mean writing essays to *justify* said fucked-up things that happen in fiction, because you almost certainly start bringing your own real-life logic to fictional events. Aka, mixing up reality and fiction. Showing your true colors. Allowing your beliefs to slip into discussion. Whatever you call that.

THE BIRDS HAVE PATHS, I CALLED IT LAST CHAPTER!

Annie has always had a hard time expressing her feelings and that she has had complexes for a long time. I'm glad Armin was able to tell her what he was thinking because it will give Annie more confidence. Plus, Annie has always been introverted and I love that Isayama tells us more about her character.

The ravens are a reference to Odin’s, a mythology character. He has two ravens, they symbolise memory and mind/thought.

What a manga.

what eren did is right you can come up with any other solution

What in the everliving fuck is going on? Can we go back to factory reset and knock some sense into Eren before he starts having wild ideas like this one? Please

BEST SHIP FINALLY HAPPENING PROPERLY AHHHHH MY BOY ARMIN IS FINALLY TALKING ABOUT HIS FEELINGS EVEN IF IT'S SUBTLE

If Eren is the bird he really is Armins WINGman.

I KNEW ARMIN LIKED ANNIE! But seeing Annie blush was a nice surprise. I thought she was the ice queen in terms of romance.

This poll is bias toward historia. I wish if y’all stop the shipping b.s

birds are supposed to symbolize freedom in most cultures, innit?

This chapter was so important to me. It showed the reality of the rumbling, and that scenery, and most importantly, Eren's true feelings on the genocide, including his now split younger self. He feels guilty about it, he knows it's bad yet he has to do it because he has no other option if he wants Paradis and everyone he loves to survive. During my life I have had a lot of instances where I had to sacrifice a lot  in order to survive, including disociating and splitting my personality in two, crushing my own feelings to do what had to be done, so characters like Eren are very relatable in that sense to me. In a kill-or-be-killed situation, there is no place nor time for doubts nor mercy and you have to do what you have to do.

Very interesting, trágico and raw, but also  liked the comparison between different concepts of the world and freedom between Armin and Eren. Also loved all the AruAni moments, they were not only adorable but also helped those two characters talk about things they needed to open up about since a long time ago lol.

I want to get off Mr. Isayama's Wild Ride

Am I the only one who can't take the alliance seriously?

Wasn't really feeling the AruAni moment, but other than that top tier chapter can't wait for more.

Armin possibly realizes Eren isn't in the right state of mind. If Eren is projecting himself as a child, then Armin might be able to come up with a plan to stop what he is doing.

Fantastic, worth the wait.

Fav chapter yet. Fall of Wall Maria got overthrown as the most depressing event in the series for me.

Favourite line in AOT :"SIT DOWN"

I don't want it to end, but I am very happy about the direction the manga is going.

I felt for eren

This chapter was legendary, it hit all the right notes for finally giving Eren's POV. The shot of child Eren above the clouds will go down as one of the best panels ever... also Eren's line about "disappointment"... fantastic it gave me chills.

I find ‘the cycle of revenge’ storyline tiring. I’ve seen it so many times before and there isn’t anything new being covered here. I just feel tired and sad honestly. My last (and probably unfulfilled) hope for the series would be for Levi to make it through this, work things out with Zeke without violence and be able to move on in his life. He could help the survivors of the rumbling and reestablish civilization, maybe open his tea shop, see the world, maybe fall in love. I don’t really care. I just want to see my boy alive and doing okay for himself. A ridiculous thought for this series, I know. With 3-4 chapters left I feel we will most likely just be left in a misery marinara. I’m soaking in it right now.

I have too many thoughts on this chapter, I wouldn't know where to begin

i wanted him to save ramzi, but i didnt at the same time?? i was glad he didnt spare him, but im sad he didnt?? i dont know why

I just want everything to end already

i just want the best ending for all characters, esp Eren.

I like how Isayama is pushing the cognitive dissonance that i have of what side i should choose.....he is really fuckin with me at this point. All the thinking has now made me kinda numb

I like Isayama drawing birds and see the art improvement through the chapters :D I announce August is the Eek Appreciation Month dedicated to the Wings of Freedom! EEEEEEEEEEEK

I like that it pretty much ended the discussion of Eren having other plans. He's been totally honest the entire time. If he had other plans, why'd he put his friend in danger by having them fight against him?

for real had to pause for a bit at many points in this chapter lmao

Maybe this is why he never talked to his friends- he didn't care about discussing what's right for them, he just wanted his FrEeDoM and would walk over children to get it.

Glad to see Armin and Annie being cute, they deserve a few moments of happiness.

Glad to see Eren’s thoughts and feelings about the rumbling. There are a lot of loose ends that I was hoping to have some answers for in this chapter but it didn’t happen in this chapter, which just made me more intrigued.

Glad to see that Eren's uncaring exterior was finally dispelled this chapter

God I can't see this ending good and I just really want this to be over soon. Never rooted as much for an MC to die as now.

Which of the following best describe how you feel about the rumbling?  Pointless, it won't achieve anything.

while i find aruani cute i still find it weird since she literally was crying the previous chapter. i was disappointed that we didn't get to see all the alliance

Why tf is Ymir in the realworld!?

WHENS MAHVEL

SS ARUANI GONNA RUMBLE THE SHIP HARDER THEN EREN RUMBLED THOSE POOR CHILDREN, TAKE THAT NONBELIEVERS no really, this was built up from s1, and they have wonderfully complementing personalities. Sad that half the fandom gets triggered from any het ship (and vice versa)

Crack theory: Eren has two personalities which is why he acts in contradictory ways. The "evil" nature is in kid Eren and the "good" nature is in the bird. There is no consciousness in his actual body anymore.

Genocide route best route

Way better than the last chapter. 130 was just good art and shipping bait which felt like it was forced for the sake of the end of a volume. This chapter was amazing and balanced its multiple purposes effortlessly, as opposed to the clunky nature of the previous chapters. Probably the best chapter since Ymir's backstory. I love how Armin tied into it, we haven't seen he and Eren's shared dream brought up for a while, as it had faded into background despite being such a driving force for both characters before the timeskip.

I was sure that the dichotomy between Eren's motivations was clearly between his friends/the people he wants freedom for, and his own quest to soothe the anger he has in his heart. Essentially is he doing this for love or hate. Yet we get a third motivation introduced this chapter, of him achieving his child self's dream of freedom in a wall-less world, and what do you know it's tied into "that scenery/that sight", Isayama you genius. What does this mean about those other motivations, though? Is everything false and it's just what Eren is telling himself? What's the lie? What's the truth? What to believe…

It might just be because Eren subconsciously called to Armin. So if more memories surface, more characters can talk with him potentially.

Time loop theory!

Timey Wimey P A T H S shenanigans.

Even if I'm not surprised, it's disappointing to see how Eren is the worst Jaeger after all. He used to make bad decisions trying to help "humanity", but now he just thinks he's right, when not even half of Paradis agrees with his ideas.

I hate Eren from the bottom of my heart. He's disgusting, a total piece of shit. And I love Isayama for giving me all these feelings. He's the real GOAT here.

Really made me wish Isayama hadn't gone for the ~mystery~ of Eren becoming the villain and had instead at least given us the flashbacks in chronological order. The way this long-awaited PoV reveal has been done has felt so clunky and awkward.

I honestly don't understand those who used to support the Rumbling but no longer do after this chapter; maybe they are the same kind of people that romanticized Omnicide and kept defending it as the  "morally correct thing to do"  and that they "would most certainly do it"  if they were in Eren's shoes... Until the reality hit them and all of their posturing like a bag of bricks - i.e. the typical edgy keyboard warrior.

As a pro-Rumbling fan, I always knew this was the expected outcome; if anything this chapter was everything I hoped that Isayama would show to us because it once and for all disproved the idea that Eren has a plan beyond the Rumbling. A Lelouch ending (which I hope doesn't happen) can still be pulled, but its not something that Eren is actively working torwards, but the end result if the alliance somehow stops him.

rumbling go brrrrrrrr

Zeke is controlling the bird with his beast Titan ability that he learnt from the paths realm

"what will my mother think of me?" Ashamed of you, eren, duh.

I really can't feel sorry for eren when this is ultimately the choice he made. There were always other choices up until the point where he killed many world leaders in his attack on Marley.

A bit sappy but understandable. From a egoist point of view Eren is justified in his actions, but of course this just reaffirms the Eldians "monstrous" nature to them. The Eldians dont have a realistic out unless the titans are truly gone forever if Eren loses. Curious about the birds.

A freckled girl appeared. That's progress.

BRUTAL.

Also what about the Eldians living outside of Paradis Island? IMO they are the ones suffering the most

Can he even be stopped?

Can people stop saying that because you enjoy the direction of the story that you’re a genocide supporter? I like shooter games too but I’m obviously not going to go kill anyone, everyone needs to chill out with the moral policing, you sound like the Tipper Gore crowd. Is the rumbling justified? No, but it’s a great direction for the story and it was inevitable once it was established what was in the walls. Chekhov’s gun had to go off sometime, I’m actually surprised how many people seem to be agonizing over this.

Can't put it into words how amazing AOT has become and is just stepping over each level taking one step at a time !!!

Can't wait till next one

Changed the opinion of many people on eren's genocide

Chapter confirmed Eren is NOT the father

Cruel just like the world

This chapter re-assured me that that first scene of Mikasa is the moment she says goodbye to a dying Eren.

Damn bro it’s great

Dang. When this is animated, I guarantee a lot of youtubers and just the anime fandom in general will think this is the best series of all time.

Eren is one of the best MCs of all time.

Eren is one of the most tragic characters on manga

Eren is the best protagonist

Eren is the GOAT but is also wrong and needs to die real soon

EREN IS THE GOATTTT. AOT IS THE GOATTTT. ISAYAMA IS THE GOATTTT.

Eren is truly the best developed main character from any shonen series, this chapter made my mind.

Eren loses it, again

great job Isayama. well done you madman

Great painfull chapter, Eren having a breakdown Made me so sad and depressed,  I wish him to achieve freedom

Greatest manga of all time

greatest piece of fiction of our generation

Hange is right, this is not an acceptable solution

I cried while reading it no joke

I don't even know what to say about Eren. Sure, this chapter is showing his guilt, but that definitely does NOT justify his actions. EXPLAIN YOURSELVES, YEAGERISTS, EREN STANS!!!!!! (sorry I'm just angry about him)

I still think there needs to be a twist, because for me the character development still doesn't work. Eren and Historia have both forgotten common sense and do awful stupid things for stupid, hollow (plot) reasons, and the 104th this entire arc have both become somewhat useless and self-righteous at the convenience of the author. I don't care if the whole arc happened this way just because clearly Isayama wants to have the rumbling as the last arc, but if this was his objective he should have been more focused on character consistency and less on the mystery of it all. It still all feels less like the choices of actual characters than plot convenience, and it gives me the same sensation of the Serumbowl, which I thought was the nadir of the series.

If truly there's won't be some last minute twist it's just bad character writing in service of a plot decided in advance. Same with Historia and the 104th. Who cares about character consistence? Not Isayama, apparently

For some reason Eren wants Armin to the what his is doing.

Honestly, of all the characters Armin is the last I'd want succeding in stopping Eren. Let Mikasa have the spotlight, damn it.

Beautiful pain

Beautifully drawn but very gory

a person can gladly become a devil or a god if he has to, for justice.

A truly sad and terrifying chapter. I never understood how anyone could support this. Don't get me wrong. I understand plotwise why it had to happen. I knew Isayama would show us this. This part was unavoidable for the story he's trying to tell. Doesn't mean I have ever supported it, or that I ever will. But hey at least Aruannie is cannon, so that's a silver linning to this absolutely horrible chapter.

PS. I never wanted to punch a fictional character in the face as much as I want to punch Eren's. Alas, he's not real and I will never get the satisfaction of doing that.

Adding onto child eren's freedom panel, i believe it represents the idea of freedom he had wished for before he was betrayed by the world itself.

All hail the mad king

All that suffering, for what. You won but at what cost

IT MAKES MY HEAD SPIN AND THE FORSHADOWING BUILD UP TO THIS CHAPTER IS JUST *chefs kiss*

It really shows that Attack On Titan isn’t an ordinary story. It is a storyline filled with emotions, tragedies and somehow the cruel reality that this world possesses.

It shifted through a lot of POVs, it was pretty good.

It showed the rumbling and Eren in much more impartial way.

It was crazy to finally see in Eren's Head but all it did was confirm the things I was thinking for awhile and put me more on his side.At this point I'm ride or Die Eren Yaeger just so I can see how this all ends.

It was good, but I wish we would've gotten more with the rest of the crew going to Marley.

Listen, I really love Eren, I have deeply felt for him. I still do, I relate too much with his own traumas but since the timeskip. I have distanced myself from him and I don't and have never supported on his stance for genocide because he set this up with Zeke and pushed Marley to go into war while they didn't want it in the first place. However I have too much of a strong emotional connection to him so I understand him and I admit, it made me doubt a little bit on some of my stances. Since Eren is so different from who he was back before the timeskip, I have always assumed and the manga has not proved me wrong, that he's being influenced by something or someone which is feeling on his traumas, anger, depression and dissapointments. So I am still extremely optimistic about him.

Jesus Fucking Christ

its funny how the dream dies with reality

Its great to finally get some of Erens thoughts but it’s just made me think he’s not acc the one in control

My tears create a whole new ocean.

no opinion really, chapter felt kinda flat and repetitive in parts

Alliance supporters learning that Eren is suffering with all this shit and isn't trash and pitiful like their hypocrite babies who were genociding their own people in the last 32 volumes.

Amazing. The way Eren developed from this angsty little child to someone who's willing to kill everyone to achieve his childhood dream and save his pals is truly wonderful.

Rumbling go wee

I found it tragically ironic that Eren just has a passing thought of what his mom would think of his actions, and it reminds me of how he wouldn’t listen to her when he was younger. Do you think this is a subtle indication that Eren hasn’t matured from the thought processes of a selfish boy, or does he truly hold weight and more consideration to what his mother (and other people) would think? Personally, I think he is more aware of outside views, but just refuses to accept that reality because he is so stuck on his own desires.

It's one of the pivotal scenes because atleast I know that within Eren he still at somepoint have consicience and shows that at somepoint he can be stopped.

Rumbling goes rumble

Eremin <3

Yams makes me confused! I dunno!

Collosal Titans go brr

CONFUSING IN WAY TOO MANY PARTS!!! where to start or stop... from ymir to bird to child eren is all confusing af but nice :)

Depression and depression

Did we really need to spend that many pages on that AruAni BS? So much for fucking 5% being left.

Dis gon be good

Let's get the final confrontation underway!

Welp, there is absolutely no defying it: Eren is the big bad and there is no secret plan to make it up.

Let’s get ready to RUUUUUUUUMBLE!

LETS FUCKING GOOO

Levi and Hange convo when? Armin and Annie end of the world sex when? Jean confessing to Mikasa when? Floch suprise killing Connie or Jean when? Floch getting thrown over board to die at sea rather than being shot when?

LOLZ at anyone still defending the rumbling after this chapter portraying it as something heroic or justifiable

Make me feel. Make me feel more.

Man, this is rough.

Overall well rounded chapter. Time to get back to alliance and Historia after this though.

Poor Eren. But I kind of understand.

Ppl who are calling Eren GOAT or saying they were only sad in this chapter bc Eren cried are legit psychopaths.

Seeing Eren’s POV and reasoning behind pursuing the rumbling makes me feel for him. We know he cares about his friends, paradis, etc. I am at a loss of words for this chapter. However I will say this, Armin in paths with Eren is not a coincidence. I think isayama is foreshadowing of a conversation THEY’VE ALREADY HAD, and what’s to come..

Isayama is being stingy about letting his characters talk to each other properly. I mean really how many scenes do we have left on this boat while the rumbling goes on? When there’s still so much to be said. Wasted chapter imo, a lot more could’ve been said and done.

E+H=Y

Eren confirmed that he will kill everyone. The rumbling cannot be stopped.

Even though we have gotten some insight on Eren's pov, it has created more questions than answers. His motives are still very confusing and we are still being kept in the dark

Every chapter update makes me sad :( the story has gotten so tragic and i love it but oof. I didnt think it could get sadder but Isayama proves me wrong every month

Every new released chapter is better than the last one. I love these series. Props to mr. Hajime Isayama 💪🏆

Exactly what we needed, have more faith now.

Exceeded my expectations. The last two chapters were mindblowing after a slow mini Arc at the port. Isayama can really pull ar your heartstrings with flashbacks and Eren's pov.

Thanks Isayama for the microscopic eremin crumbs

that kid eren scene though... easily the best scene the series so far

That was damn perfect

That was f***ing amazing and awful at the same time. I want this series to end, but actually no. Keep going Isayama. You crazy motherf***er.

the "beyond the walls" talk between armin and eren is being brought up again and im emotional now thx

The ending's gonna disappoint people, no matter how well/badly it's executed. Chapter was cool, but overhyped imo

The pacing seems slow, but then again, it was recently nodded to that the manga won't end at Chapter 134 or 135 but 136. And Isayama does have everything planned out for a long time. I don't think he'll disappoint.

the significance of many things in the story are too epic, carla and mikasa look alike, grisha and eren look alike, historia and dina even look alike, the repeating actions, along with the intricate history formed, give us a lot to speculate but nothing to confirm.

I am somewhat sad for eren, to see the point that he has reached by having that freedom that he longed for so much but that I hardly think exists is sad, I don't know how the hell this is going to end but hey I don't know

I can't even begin to imagine how this is going to look in the anime. Definitely not for the faint of heart.

I can't imagine how the manga will end in a few chapters

I can't wait for 132.

I can’t believe this

I can’t wait to see this chapter voice acted, holy shit.

I loved the context that Eren's apology provides, really gives some much needed insight on his thoughts about the future during the timeskip

I need him to talk to mikasa and armin!

On this poll, I noticed that there's nothing about Mikasa haha. I want her to have a moment for the next chapter, or appear on Eren's memories. We know she's gonna be playing a big role for this arc.

I like where the story is going and I can’t wait for the anime so I can show AOT to everyone.

I think Eren is going somewhere. If he wanted to rumble the world, he can control the titans even from the safety of Paradis. I think he is going to that tree under which Ymir fell.

I think it focuses on Eren a bit too much. Maybe show us some Levi? Thank you.

i think reiner is gay

I am currently not taking a side. Not with Eren or with the Yeagerists or with our heroes. I'm just here to see how it all goes down and how Isayama wants to play it out. I've been enjoying every single chapter and being so moved it's insane. F the ship wars and the bs, this story is much more than that. And tragedy is written all over it. Ok brb getting my tissues prepared for next chapter.... 👍

I don't know how many more issues we're going to have but I worry that the story is going to come to a screeching halt and leave too many questions unanswered. Isayama has got so many plates spinning, narratively speaking, I have no idea how he is going to finish them or if he'll finish them at all.

Just a series of gut-punches one after the other after every panel, oof this chapter affected me more than any other. It also made me wonder about how the planet in general would be affected.  Like how would ecosystems change?  Will Eren only go after the civilized countries and then stop?  Or will he not let a single person survive outside the island and just actually steamroll the whole planet?  If he does, wouldn't that change climates and stuff?  What's about the animals and plants? Am I thinking too much about this? How will the drastic changes affect the Paradisians? All this assuming the alliance doesn't manage to stop him (which is likely)

although initially him and reiner seemed to pursue the same path, eren initial motive was to wipe them all and he said it multiple times, I don't believe he has guilt nor remorse because "it was all set from the very start"

We also got a seamless reintegration of the theme of what it means to be a "good person", something both Armin and Annie have grappled with as far back as Female Titan arc, and it's great to see it re-emerge in the context of the rumbling. Annie is an underrated character. Isayama could have had her come back with some bullshit royal blood or daughter-of-Kruger twist, but instead he decides to integrate her into the conflict as her own person and make her a more interesting character than Reiner (sorry Soul).

Eren is allowed to have emotions, he should be able to feel terrible about himself for having to wipe out most of humanity. But he also believes that this is the only way. He begged Hange if there was another way, he WANTED an option that didn't end with the world being rumbled. When Hange had no ideas, and no else had a plan that would keep Paradis safe, he felt like he had to move forward, towards freedom.

Eren is neither right or wrong in his decision. Killing innocents, destroying entire ecosystems and ending human civilization is morally bankrupt. In many ways his plan is short sighted, but when I say this, my stance comes from a logical standpoint rather than a moral one(the political instability of the island, the precedent it sets, the danger he put his friends in). The *most* moral thing to do was a partial rumbling(there are still some issues both logistical and moral) and while 2 wrongs don’t make a right, I hold Marley and many other nations equally at fault for not being willing to end this diplomatically. Their scorched earth policy brought this on. It’s unfortunate that their citizens are paying the price for their governments crimes. But you can’t threaten to wipe out an entire civilization with no negotiation and not expect a desperate response like a full rumbling. This doesn’t absolve eren of responsibility of his actions, but the rumbling is an extremely unfortunate even that was 100% avoidable if diplomacy had been an option.

Eren, no! That’s all I can say at this point! Armin please, I’m begging you, stop your mans.

Eren, what the fuck?

Eren's self pity doesn't change the fact that he's killing millions of innocents and he's not going to stop despite it.

Eren’s guilt over his actions doesn’t mean a thing considering he’s still doing it. The fact that he saw the future and did nothing to stop it (and actively made it happen) makes him even worse. I don’t feel sorry for him in the slightest.

Even though Eren has the skeletal structure as an (I don't even know.. turkey/bird.. eh...) people are still going to simp the shit out of him on twitter, like jfc-

Eren wanted to destroy all life outside paradis not because he wanted outside world to be just a wonderland of blazing fire , grasslands etc. but because the people outside are making it impossible enough for him to realise his dream of total freedom

I would like to add that AruAni scene was, in my opinion, really important for both armin and Annie character development, since they're having a romance scene with the theoretically enemy (armin is from paradis and Annie is from Marley). I think this represent well that people from Marley and people from Eldia can live together, without violence. (I wish I could write more, but English is not my first language)

I'm glad we're finally getting things more thoroughly from Eren's perspective. Up until now, his motivations and thoughts have mostly been discussed by other characters, but we finally get to hear from him directly. This chapter mostly confirmed what I suspected, that Eren isn't heartless, but he was also a tragic character that was perfectly aware of the destruction he was about to bring upon so many people. Overall really good, can't wait for the next chapter, whatever it may be.

I'm happy that Isayama made clear what an egoist and violent nature  Eren always had, since he was a child: he's not an hero, not an avenger and surely not the "chad goat" some teen edgelords think.

I'm literally shaking so hard rn

The wall titans were always an obvious metaphor for "what if Japan had WMDs", but in this chapter this is made even more obvious when there is nothing left from migrant children but two dark kid-shaped splatters on the ground, which is a pretty clear visual reference to citizens of Hiroshima leaving nothing but scorched silhouettes behind when the atomic bombing happened.

Ironically, there was a popular twitter thread this week about the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and despite not being very familiar with the topic itself, I was somewhat amused to find the arguments in the comments to be very familiar. It's payback, it's to prevent future war, it was justified because of Japanese government's war crimes, Japanese citizens were indoctrinated and racist and would NEVER give up fighting foreigners so bombings were a mercy, it's collateral damage, etc etc.

The warriors deserve much better than being used as props.

There's 99% chance this series is getting a downer ending

They had it coming. The world was warned yet they still provoked him so much. I feel for Eren..

What is the most disappointing thing is how selfish and unreasonable mankind can be. So much hatred between so many people and nations, the world of Attack on Titan is a cursed one. So much blood spilled everywhere, and why? Is it because it's justice? Or is it because it's mother nature? Or is it because mankind is known for bloodshed and selfishness? So much hatred has blinded people, they no longer care to listen for the reason. Nothing matters to them, just their goals. All of this pointless conflict when people can simply try to speak up, try to understand each other, simply make bonds. If people could only live with a bit more empathy... All we can do is hope that so many deaths will have any meaning. Or perhaps Genocide/omnicide never had any meaning... Perhaps all of this was pointless strife.

This chapter confirmed Uri's predictions during his conversation with Kenny by the river. It remains to be seen now whether the alliance will be able to stop eren. I am sad for the world and for Ramzi and his brother. The pictures were horrible to watch (Isayama is very good at drawing emotions).

i'm...so very tired

I’m freakin cryin i need someone to hold me

Slowly, everything is coming back in its place. I am super dedicated at this point to the manga and I just hope Isayama is gonna be able to reach the perfect conclusion for such all these years of construction.

So Eren is a fish Titan...?

Still pro-rumble

Such a tragedy this whole story is. Really heartbreaking to witness. But so meticulously done and masterfully written.

Somebody said, maybe Eren and Zeke were actually fighting or going on memory journey schmuck in the Paths currently, that's why Eren is sleeping and automatically runs the titan on the outside.

If zeke didn’t pull this shit up in the first place none of this wouldn’t happen

Starting to reconsider the time-loop theory being wrong. Everything is literally coming full circle.

Isayama youre a genius but you love seeing us hurt and confused dont you 😭😭😭

It bothered me how surprised people were that Eren did the rumbling and it was sad.  He's been saying he was gonna do it for ages, and now he is.  What's with the surprised pikachu fandom?

Jesus Christ everyone needs therapy

Please end this story with happy ending!

#snk poll #snk polls #snk chapter 131 #snk 131

[birdlord]

Everything I Watched in 2020

We’ll start with movies. The number in parentheses is the year of release, asterisks denote a re-watch, and titles in bold are my favourite watches of the year. Here’s 2019’s list. 

01 Little Women (19)

02 The Post (17) 

03 Molly’s Game (17)

04 * Doctor No (62)

05 Groundhog Day (93)

06 *Star Trek IV - The Voyage Home (86)

07 Knives Out (19) My last theatre experience (sob)

08 Professor Marston and his Wonder Women (17)

09 Les Miserables (98)

10 Midsommar (19) I’m not sure how *good* it is, but it does stick in the ol’ brain

11 *Manhattan Murder Mystery (93)

12 Marriage Story (19)

13 Kramer vs Kramer (79)

14 Jojo Rabbit (19)

15 J’ai perdu mon corps (19) a cute animated film about a hand detached from its body!

16 1917 (19)

17 Married to the Mob (88)

18 Klaus (19)

19 Portrait of a Lady on Fire (19) If Little Women made me want to wear a scarf criss-crossed around my torso, this one made me want to wear a cloak

20 The Last Black Man in San Francisco (19)

21 *Lawrence of Arabia (62)

22 Gone With the Wind (39)

23 Kiss Me Deadly (55)

24 Dredd (12)

25 Heartburn (86) heard a bunch about this one in the Blank Check series on Nora Ephron, sadly after I’d watched it

26 The Long Shot (19)

27 Out of Africa (85)

28 King Kong (46)

29 *Johnny Mnemonic (95)

30 Knocked Up (07)

31 Collateral (04)

32 Bird on a Wire (90)

33 The Black Dahlia (05)

34 Long Time Running (17)

35 *Magic Mike (12)

36 Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead (07)

37 Cold War (18)

38 *Kramer Vs Kramer (79) yes I watched this a few months before! This was a pandemic friend group co-watch.

39 *Burn After Reading (08)

40 Last Holiday (50)

41 Fly Away Home (96)

42 *Moneyball (11) I’m sure I watch this every two years, at most??

43 Last Holiday (06) the Queen Latifah version of the 1950 movie above, lacking, of course, the brutal “poor people don’t deserve anything good” ending

44 *Safe (95)

45 Gimme Shelter (70)

46 The Daytrippers (96)

47 Experiment in Terror (62)

48 Tucker: The Man and His Dream (88)

49 My Brilliant Career (79) one of the salvations of 2020 was watching movies “with” friends. Our usual method was to video chat before the movie, sync our streaming services, and text-chat while the movie was on. 

50 Divorce Italian Style (61)

51 *Gosford Park (01) another classic comfort watch, fuck I love a G. Park

52 Hopscotch (80)

53 Brief Encounter (45)

54 Hud (63)

55 Ocean’s 8 (18)

56 *Beverly Hills Cop (84)

57 Blow the Man Down (19)

58 Constantine (05)

59 The Report (19) maddening!! How are people so consistently terrible to one another!

60 Everyday People (04)

61 Anatomy of a Murder (58)

62 Spiderman: Homecoming (17)

63 *To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar (95) Of the 90s drag road movies, Priscilla is more visually striking, but this has its moments.

64 Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me (92)

65 *The Truman Show (98)

66 Mona Lisa (86)

67 The Blob (58)

68 The Guard (11)

69 *Waiting for Guffman (96) RIP Fred Willard

70 Rocketman (19)

71 Outside In (18)

72 The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (08) how strange to see a movie that you have known the premise for, but no details of, for over a decade

73 *Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country (91)

74 The Reader (08)

75 Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (19) This was fine until it VERY MUCH WAS NOT FINE

76 The End of the Affair (99) you try to watch a fun little romp about infidelity during the Blitz, and Graham Greene can’t help but shoehorn in a friggin crisis of religious faith

77 Must Love Dogs (05) barely any dog content, where are the dogs at

78 The Rainmaker (97)

79 *Batman & Robin (97)

80 National Lampoon’s Vacation (83) Never seen any of the non-xmas Vacations, didn’t realize the children are totally different, not just actors but ages! Also, this one is blatantly racist!

81 *Mystic Pizza (88)

82 Funny Girl (68)

83 The Sons of Katie Elder (65)

84 *Knives Out (19) another re-watch within the same year!! How does this keep happening??

85 *Scott Pilgrim Vs The World (10) a real I-just-moved-away-from-Toronto nostalgia watch

86 Canadian Bacon (92) vividly recall this VHS at the video store, but I never saw it til 2020

87 *Blood Simple (85)

88 Brittany Runs a Marathon (19)

89 The Accidental Tourist (88)

90 August Osage County (13) MELO-DRAMA!!

91 Appaloosa (08)

92 The Firm (93) Feeling good about how many iconic 80s/90s video store stalwarts I watched in 2020

93 *Almost Famous (00)

94 Whisper of the Heart (95)

95 Da 5 Bloods (20)

96 Rain Man (88)

97 True Stories (86)

98 *Risky Business (83) It’s not about what you think it’s about! It never was!

99 *The Big Chill (83)

100 The Way We Were (73)

101 Safety Last (23) It’s getting so that I might have to add the first two digits to my dates...not that I watch THAT many movies from the 1920s...

102 Phantasm (79)

103 The Burrowers (08)

104 New Jack City (91)

105 The Vanishing (88)

106 Sisters (72)

107 Puberty Blues (81) Little Aussie cinema theme, here

108 Elevator to the Gallows (58)

109 Les Diaboliques (55)

110 House (77) haha WHAT no really W H A T

111 Death Line (72)

112 Cranes are Flying (57)

113 Holes (03)

114 *Lady Vengeance (05)

115 Long Weekend (78)

116 Body Double (84)

117 The Crazies (73) I love that Romero shows the utter confusion that would no doubt reign in the case of any kind of disaster. Things fall apart.

118 Waterlilies (07)

119 *You’re Next (11)

120 Event Horizon (97)

121 Venom (18) I liked it, guys, way more than most superhero fare. Has a real sense of place and the place ISN’T New York!

122 Under the Silver Lake (18) RIP Night Call

123 *Blade Runner (82)

124 *The Birds (62) interesting to see now that I’ve read the story it came from

125 *28 Days Later (02) hits REAL FUCKIN’ DIFFERENT in a pandemic

126 Life is Sweet (90)

127 *So I Married an Axe Murderer (93) find me a more 90s movie, I dare you (it’s not possible)

128 Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner (67)

129 The Pelican Brief (93) 90s thrillers continue!

130 Dick Johnston is Dead (20)

131 The Bridges of Madison County (95)

132 Earth Girls are Easy (88) Geena Davis and Jeff Goldblum are so hot in this movie, no wonder they got married 

133 Better Watch Out (16)

134 Drowning Mona (00) trying for something like the Coen bros and not getting there

135 Au Revoir Les Enfants (87)

136 *Chasing Amy (97) Affleck is the least alluring movie lead...ever? I also think I gave Joey Lauren Adams’ character short shrift in my memory of the movie. It’s not good, but she’s more complicated than I recalled. 

137 Blackkklansman (18)

138 Being Frank (19)

139 Kiki’s Delivery Service (89)

140 Uncle Frank (20) why so many FRANKS

141 *National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (89) watching with pals (virtually) made it so much more fun than the usual yearly watch!

142 Half Baked (98) another, more secret Toronto nostalgia pic - RC Harris water filtration plant as a prison!

143 We’re the Millers (13)

144 All is Bright (13)

145 Defending Your Life (91)

146 Christmas Chronicles (18) I maintain that most new xmas movies are terrible, particularly now that Netflix churns them out like eggnog every year. 

147 Spiderman: Into the Spider-Verse (18)

148 Reindeer Games (00) what did I say about Affleck??!? WHAT DID I SAY

149 Palm Springs (20)

150 Happiest Season (20)

151 *Metropolitan (90) it’s definitely a Christmas movie

152 Black Christmas (74)

THEATRE:HOME - 2:150 (thanks pandemic)

I usually separate out docs and fiction, but I watched almost no documentaries this year (with the exception of Dick Johnston). Reality is real enough. 

TV Series

01 - BoJack Horseman (final season) - Pretty damned poignant finish to the show, replete with actual consequences for our reformed bad boy protagonist (which is more than you can say for most antiheroes of Peak TV).

02 - *Hello Ladies - I enjoy the pure awkwardness of seeing Stephen Merchant try to perform being a Regular Person, but ultimately this show tips him too far towards a nasty, Ricky Gervais-lite sort of persona. Perhaps he was always best as a cameo appearance, or lip synching with wild eyes while Chrissy Teigen giggles?

03 - Olive Kittredge - a rough watch by times. I read the book as well, later in the year. Frances Mcdormand was the best, possibly the only, casting option for the flinty lead. One episode tips into thriller territory, which is a shock. 

04 - *The Wire S3, S4, S5 - lockdown culture! It was interesting to rewatch this, then a few months later go through an enormous, culture-level reappraisal of cop-centred narratives. 

05 - Forever - a Maya Rudolph/Fred Armisen joint that coasts on the charm of its leads. The premise is OK, but I wasn’t left wanting any more at the end. 

06 - *Catastrophe - a rewatch when my partner decided he wanted to see it, too!

07 - Red Oak - resolutely “OK” steaming dramedy, relied heavily on some pretty obvious cues to get across its 1980s setting. 

08 - Little Fires Everywhere - gulped this one down while in 14-day isolation, delicious! Every 90s suburban mom had that SUV, but not all of them had the requisite **secrets**

09 - The Great - fun historical comedy/drama! Costumes: lush. Actors: amusing. Race-blind casting: refreshing!

10 - The Crown S4 - this is the season everyone lost their everloving shit for, since it’s finally recent enough history that a fair chunk of the viewing audience is liable to recall it happening. 

11 - Ted Lasso - we resisted this one for a while (thought I did enjoy the ad campaign for NBC sports (!!) that it was based on). My view is that its best point was the comfort that the men on the show have (or develop, throughout the season) with the acknowledgement and sharing of their own feelings. Masculinity redux. 

12 - Moonbase 8 - Goodnatured in a way that makes you certain they will be crushed. 

13 - The Good Lord Bird - Ethan Hawke is really aging into the character actor we always hoped he would be! 

14 - Hollywood - frothy wish-fulfillment alternate history. I think the show would have been improved immeasurably by skipping the final episode.

[sdhjxgctisd]

A year before the crash, in 1936

A year before the crash, in 1936, Baltimoreans had been excited by the news that they would get a glimpse of the giant Hindenburg, which was to circle the city late on the afternoon of Saturday, Aug. “I was certain this would please you,” he said, puzzled. "Is this going to be a lot that the students are going to be able to build on? Is it challenging?" are the questions that are asked. It difficult. She will never wash the stain away, no matter how hard she scrubs. A few calls showed neighborhood zoning and homeowner regulations allowed it if various permits were granted. In September, 1834, the writer of this had an interview with James G. He doesn't put up big numbers, but rarely makes mistakes. It did not surprise him that his uncle had chosen to leave these men behind when the Iron Fleet went home. 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So here is the information that I could find regarding the styling tool. At least they do not stink of vomit.. According to Genworth Financial's 2011 Cost of Care Survey the median annual rate of a private nursing home room in North Dakota is $78,475, while a semi private room is a bit less at $68,718. Imagine my distress. For different age group children, there are certainly a lot more creative choices of gifts. She also appeared in NJN's Su Salud Primero, focusing on barriers to healthcare in New Jersey's Hispanic communities. C. There I soon found an old woman I knew who sold old clothes of all sorts. Jones, to whom we have already alluded, when taking a survey of the condition of the negroes considered as a field for missionary effort, takes into account all the conditions of their external life. Her laughter drew more wolves to her, and she killed them too, wondering if she should start a count of her own. It not so much about whether alcohol is there or not . 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They don't see it as a thing which is about that relationship between people.". Eastern Illinois recruit Jake Verhagen led the Terrors with 20 points. The Bush administration this week ended 29 years of continuous flights by Air Force doomsday planes equipped to direct a nuclear war after any Soviet attack on the United States, the Pentagon said Friday, a concession to the budget squeeze and the superpower thaw. “The count will pass thirty before midday. Witnesses, who heard the woman calling for help, agreed that the husband was strangling the woman. 210Hon. The dollar is at a five year low against the euro, but a euro on steroids isn't solely to blame. The latter wouldn't go into effect until after the 2030 Census a provision designed to get some Republican lawmakers to support the bill knowing they probably won't be personally affected by it.. szemüveg csúszásgátló What happened to him? He did a hell lot better than any other Oz spinner I have seen in the last 2 3 yrs. The beast began to move, trunk swaying from side to side. Lions were big. It occurred to me that the poor forsaken orphan whose own mother had been cursed by an unforgiving father might, by the sad and tragic story of her life and of her mother’s death, touch the old man and move him to generous feelings. But it will never happen as mental health care is very expensive. (By the way, you'll recognize an older Rolland Smith, the anchorman from our earlier "fighting the frizzies" video.). Tune in on Friday and Saturday night and you see lots of dim photos of young folks out on the town. Wearisome days and nights again rolled on. I think that's nike air max 102 essential white obviously true, I mean Concorde keeps flying because passengers want to use it, if passengers say they don't duci alkalmi ruha want to use the aeroplane any longer than Concorde will certainly come to an end. My point is to get these cases solved, not to point fingers."Killers may not commit several murders at once, but spread their attacks over years, Brown said. From whatIhave learned, thecache frequency itself should easily be increased 300 500MHz on the new K Sku processors without breaking a sweat, but like any overclock you can go higher if you want to push it a little bit.. “He dared to kill his queen. At times I thought it occasioned by the lurking fear of betrayal. Was charged with three counts of misdemeanour assault and one count of criminal trespass. I made up my mind to buy her a new dress that morning. He’s promised everything. In a typical winter, the extreme cold and other influences from nike air vortex desert sand the polar vortex are more likely in January. 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[cmanonstillinhiding]

second impact

 @enbies-and-felonies pt 5!! i’m gonna call this one the end but i might write an epilogue of sorts at some point? i hope you like it! <3

--

Hotch was gracious enough to wait until 7:30 to call them in later that day, so they drove Ellie to school on their way to the BAU. 

‘I’m getting my uniform today! We’re meeting our coach too, and having our first practice and-’

JJ groaned. ‘-and drowning your mothers in release forms, physical forms, contact forms, the list goes on.’

‘Oh, yeah. We got those already, they’re on the hall table. They need to be in by Friday.

Emily smirked. ‘Well, Ellie, I think your mom can help you with that. She does have experience.

‘Yeah, from the athlete’s perspective. I feel bad for my mother, having to fill all those out every year.’

Ellie rolled her eyes. ‘It’s not that bad. You have case reports longer almost every day.’

Emily sighed as they stopped in front of Ellie’s school. ‘All the more reason for you not to add on top of them! You have your things? Alright, we’ll pick you up after practice. Have a good day!’

Ellie hopped out of the car, waving as she headed into the building. Emily dodged through the rush hour traffic as they drove the familiar route to the BAU, neither one wanting to break the silence that had settled once Ellie left.

Hotch only kept them until around noon that day, just finishing up paperwork and tying off any loose ends that had been left in the investigation. After Morgan and Reid left arm-in-arm at 11:30, he gave up on anything productive and gave them the rest of the day off.

JJ drove home, half watching the road and half lost in thought until Emily reminded her she’d just missed the turn down their road. JJ sighed and turned the car around, aware of Emily’s eyes drilling into her. ‘You really want to have that talk, huh?’

‘Yeah, I do.’

‘Okay. As soon as we get home.’

--

JJ tossed her keys onto the hall table, grabbing Ellie’s small mountain of sports forms as she walked into the kitchen where Emily, who was already making coffee, stared at the stack. ‘All that for a middleschool sport?’

JJ sighed. ‘Oh, yeah. All that plus impact testing, insurance forms, allergy information, and gosh knows what else.’ She pulled the top packet off the pile. ‘This at least is information. Her team roster, game times, uniform rules, and her-’

Emily frowned over the counter at her pause. ‘Her what?’

JJ tossed the form back onto the table. ‘I’m going to go pick up Ellie.’

‘What? It’s 1:00, she doesn’t even get out of school for another hour and a half.’

‘I don’t want her going to practice today.’

Emily come around to grab the packet off the table. ‘I thought we were going to talk about this? What happened?’

‘Her-’ JJ’s voice broke. ‘Her coach. He used to be-’

Emily met her eyes. ‘Brian Andrews. That’s your old coach, isn’t it?’

JJ closed her eyes, barely nodding. ‘Yes. He was.’ 

‘You need to tell me what’s so bad about him. I don’t want your perception of him to affect Ellie.’

‘Why don’t you just trust me?’

‘JJ, you know I do. I just can’t-’

‘Can’t what? Can’t just please, please, listen to me without needing to hear exactly how he hurt me? Exactly what happened? Em, stop. Just stop, please. I don’t want to hear how I ‘need to look on the bright side’ and ‘just because I had a bad experience doesn’t mean Ellie will.’ Because that’s so, so, not what I need to hear right now. You think Ellie should be allowed to play, great, she can play. But I cannot look the man that almost killed me in the eye and tell him I’m glad he can do the same to my daughter. Emily, you have to hear this. I don’t want my life to ruin Ellie’s. But I need my life, my experience to mean something to you.’

Emily, entirely taken aback by her outburst, paused for a moment. When she spoke again, her voice had none of its previous edge. ‘What do you mean ‘he almost killed you?”

JJ shook her head, lips pressed together.

Emily nodded. ‘Okay. If you don’t want to talk right now, fine, but will you sit with me?’

‘What?’

Emily shifted over to make space for her on the couch. ‘Sit with me. Please.’

JJ sat down gingerly, bracing herself for Emily to continue the conversation.

Emily laid her hand on JJ’s knee, waiting for her to make the next move. JJ placed her own hand over Emily’s, leaning into her until she could rest her head on the other’s shoulder. Emily threaded her fingers into JJ’s hair, stroking gently until she felt her relax. ‘Hey, sweetheart. You with me?’

JJ nodded, tucking her head against Emily’s shoulder. 

‘Okay. Do you want to talk now, or just stay here?’

Barely more than a whisper. ‘Talk.’

‘Can I ask you a question?’

‘Yes.’

‘What did you mean when you said your coach almost killed you?’

JJ stiffened, her entire body tensing against Emily’s. She took a deep breath before beginning to speak. ‘I was 17, and got the flu just before a game. I had a fever of 102°. But missing a practice, let alone a game, as a captain was grounds for dismissal from the team. So I went. I almost passed out just walking to the field, so I swallowed my pride and asked to sit out.’

She paused, closing her eyes against the memory.

‘I stumbled out there, and he said to me,’

--

‘Are you serious? I trained you for years! Years! I made you everything you are, everything you will be, and you ask to sit out? How do you think that looks for me? My best senior, on the bench in the postseason? Not a chance! Get moving, girl. Three laps for your attitude, then practice.’

JJ had caught one word in five of his tirade through the pounding in her head. The tylenol the nurse had given her was wearing off, and she didn’t think making even one lap around the field was a possibility. She’d paused too long though, and a hand between her shoulder blades had her on the ground, facedown in the damp turf.

‘That’s four laps now, lazy. Get to it.’

JJ pulled herself up slowly, waiting for the world to stop spinning, then started a miserable jog around the field, barely upright. Pain, she was used to that. But this was different, a loss of ability, coordination, senses. Just three more laps, just two more laps, just-

--

‘I didn’t know I’d passed out until I woke up in the ER. I was left on the ground until practice was over. I was hypothermic and my temperature had spiked to 104°, but as far as Coach was concerned, I was useless.’

Emily was silent for so long JJ pulled back, turning her head up to look at Emily, hoping she hadn’t just ruined...well, everything. But Emily was staring down at her, mouth slightly open. ‘Sweetheart...I don’t know what to say.’

JJ didn’t answer, so Emily pulled her onto her lap, tucking the blonde’s head against her chest, wrapping her arms around her. ‘Shhhh, hey, I’m here. I have you.’

JJ nodded, staying where she was. ‘Do you understand now?’

‘Yeah. At least better than I did.’ Emily turned to look at her. ‘You lived like that for four years?’

‘Four years, year-round. We had an indoor rec league and spring games too. I saw him more than I saw my mother.’

‘Why didn’t you say anything?’

‘Because that’s normal! He wasn’t out of the ordinary at all for what he did, and it made us better players.’

‘I can assure you none of that made you a better player.’

‘It made me stronger.’

‘You’re repeating something he said, aren’t you.’

‘Yeah. I don’t know what else to say.’

‘What else happened?’

Emily waited a minute before JJ answered, her voice flat and detached.

‘He kept us on the field for as many as six hours, running almost the whole time. We were to attend practice no matter what, sick, injured, sister had just died, whatever. We would bleed through our cleats from blisters. When I got home every night, I would have to soak my socks and uniform to make sure my mother didn’t see the bloodstains. I played concussed and on stress fractures for two years, almost all without any access to medical care, because that would mean I had to sit out, and I couldn’t do that. On weekends we played dawn til dusk, before and after our games, with laps if we weren’t performing well enough. I wanted to quit so badly, but I had no other way out, and he knew that. For all of us.’

‘How could he do that? You were a child!’

‘We were children, and had no idea what we’d gotten into. When you don’t know anything else...I didn’t even know something was wrong with what he did until I graduated college.’

‘My god...JJ, why didn’t you tell me this earlier?’

‘I really, really don’t like talking about it, and I was hoping you’d trust me enough I wouldn’t have to.’

‘I should have. I’m so, so sorry that happened to you, love.’

JJ nodded, still curled against Emily. ‘I can’t let that happen to Ellie.’

Emily kissed her hair, pulling her closer. ‘No. We won’t let that happen. But, if there’s a rec league, or maybe a travel team around here...she really does want to play.’

JJ paused. ‘I think I could handle that, if she had a different coach. I want her to be happy, but I-I can’t have her near that man.’

‘I understand. We’ll figure it out, okay?’

‘Okay.’

They stayed like that for a while, until JJ’s phone buzzed with a text from Garcia. Emily opened it with a sigh. ‘You’ll never guess what this says...’

JJ groaned. ‘We have a case?’

‘Four dead in Providence, Rhode Island. Hotch wants us there ASAP.

‘Of course he does. I’ll call my mom to get Ellie.’

Emily groused into the hall the grab the keys. ‘They really can’t give us a day off, huh?’

‘Oh, where else would you get your adrenaline if not from chasing down the scum of the earth?’

‘We’re going to be chasing down a teenage daughter soon, I think that should about cover it.’

JJ grinned. ‘You have a point.’

Emily smirked back. ‘I know.’ 

She turned just as she reached the door, reaching for JJ’s hand. ‘I love you.’

JJ took it. ‘I love you too.’

#fun fact! nothing i have tossed into jj's backstory is something i haven't seen or personally experienced over 4 years of hs varsity sports #so if you think 'this is barbaric! how could you come up with this??' just remember that i did not in fact make this shit up #have i had some coaches who were worse than the norm? yes #were those coaches worse bc we had a reputation for winning? also yes #have i dealt with a lot of this shit? also also yes #second impact