#3. i like to think they're looking at something crazy going on . maybe fireworks | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

villalunae · 7 months

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im in such a utena mood right now i think anthy would not use nuclear war codes if she had them but would instead drop hints of incoming nuclear winter to nanami by messing with the plants in the birdcage and mentioning dead roses are often considered an omen of war (lie) so that nanami attempts to discredit her by looking up omens of war through a book miki lended her and instead finding out that all the crazy shit happening to her in the last few days (kangaroo showing up on campus was actually a political refugee, tsuwabuki prepping her cheat sheet for an upcoming test on the ramificiations of nagasaki and hiroshima, students gathering about television sets that before she can see what terrible news theyre watching someone says "turn something nice on instead!" and she only sees shopping channels marketing items like gas masks, bomb shelters, and canned foods) has actually been subtle hints and omens that they're approaching world war three and nanami ends up going to touga asking if theyre gonna make it and if japan can withstand another genocidal war crime against humanity and touga somehow reads this as her telling him her dream job is to be a stripper and tells her "silly little sister. all women are inferior to men already bc of eve's fatal sin. dont degrade yourself further than you already have" and shes like "what do you mean degrade myself further than i already have" and hes like "dont worry about it youre perfect to me. like a 9.5/10. or an 8/10. maybe a 6. definitely not any lower than a 3" and after hearing that she goes to bed upset and confused because not only is her brother not taking nuclear war seriously he also once again made her feel infantilized and small and then after hearing a loud boom in the distance she thinks nuclear war is starting and starts freaking out and thinks "my brother must have been speaking in a code! he was trying to make me feel nostalgic about my childhood to comfort me before the upcoming attack! now that nuclear war is starting i should take shelter but we dont have a bomb shelter here but ohtori has a bunch of students! it probably does!" running to ohtori and trying to think of the oldest building on campus and goes to utena and anthy's door banging on it in the middle of the night and utena gets up in her jammies like "what?" and nanamis like "QUICK we all have to GET UNDERGROUND wheres your NEAREST BOMB SHELTER" and anthy comes in behind utena like miss nanami what are you talking about? :) and utena is like yeah seriously thats so weird. i guess you can come inside . we couldnt sleep anyway because -- and then nanami sees on the floor of their room a bunch of scattered papers with a big red button in a briefcase and nanami points at anthy and is like "IT WAS YOU THAT LAUNCHED THE NUKE??????" and anthy says "oh this? this button is enrichment for my pet parrot! ive named her nanami. nanami press the button" and nanami the parrot presses the button and theres a loud boom and nanami (not the parrot) is like but what was that?!?! i heard it from my house!!!! and utena is like "oh! you must be talking about the firework display! the button is rigged up to some fireworks we got for the upcoming spring festival and we were actually up late tonight trying to get the display to work! we messed up pretty bad and most of the fireworks went off at once though haha." nanami the parrot keeps pressing the button in the bg and anthy is like "aww i guess that was the last firework left!" and nanami is like b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-but what about the kangaroo? and the test on nagasaki and hiroshima?? and the shopping channels advertising gas masks and bomb shelters and canned food??? and utena says "oh the kangaroo was a political refugee from australia its boxing career went down the hill after it killed steve durwin in a freak accident. all schools are doing history tests on world war two this time in the semester!" and anthy says "yes and because theres no clear threat of nuclear winter anymore all the old holdovers from wwii are being sold at discounted prices :)"

as nanami leaves the house feeling much better but also stupider she gets traumatized one last time by another firework going off and utena yells out the window "sorry nanami! guess there was one more loaded in there!" the firework design is chuchus face and he has been mysteriously absent this whole time. we see him in the sex car with that cat thing from madoka driving

#personal #utena #rgu #im blacking out now

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twinsoftriumph · 7 months

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lalut will be later i promise i just need to group everyone in a way that makes sense. ANYWAY cital and sameyi are siblings and they've got a Potion Business to run except its sorta not really a business because cital refuses any form of compensation half the time despite sameyi's best efforts. more detail under the cut

they're found family because i drew them and was like yeah ill make them siblings why not

cital wears blushing prospector hair, rallying thrillseeker outfit, saluting captain firework staff, twirling champion mask, and shushing light scholar cape

sameyi wears hide n seek pioneer hair, forgetful storyteller outfit, frantic stagehand mask, withered antlers (modified), flower crown, and winter ancestor cape

cital is a How i look with he/him in my bio kinda guy. ive made this joke like 3 times and ill make it again

nothing to smile about in his life. (this is a joke he lives a pretty cozy life he just has RBF)

hes also hard of hearing and he and sameyi communicate primarily through signing

hes a spell maker and specializes in protection potions because he started out making anti-rain spells for forest, also does enchantments for living areas (basically just a spell but applied to an area)

he operates more on a "If you bring me the right supplies ill make you the spell" basis

hes not even really a tired grumpy type he's moreso just the Straight Man (NOT HET).

however the easiest way to piss him off is to use magic carelessly. he is a certain someone's number 1 hater

sameyi's his number one promoter. sameyi travels wayyy more and will pop up literally everywhere

it's to the point where you would wonder if she's doing this on purpose and like. Maybe? but she's also just very mobile and knows all the hotspots

definitely very charming. couldve been a scammer if she really wanted to

she's a theater nerd and loves. well. the Theatrics. she herself is incredibly dedicated to the bit. if she doesn't continue the bit you know somethings wrong

when she gets cital to go along with a bit she goes BONKERS CRAZY and thinks he's the funniest guy ever

probably haunted but she has a job so she doesn't really care about that rn. will not elaborate if asked.

#sol talks #oc #sky cotl #cital #sameyi #my art

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sixohsixoheightfourtwo · 1 year

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watchlist tag game!

tagged by @telomeke !

got a bit long so behind the cut

Currently watching -

A Boss and a Babe (Thailand 2023 / GMMTV) - watching this weekly. ok . LISTEN. I said some stuff in the tags of my first reblog about this series, when i had only seen the trailer, basically that it looked like they absolutely nailed what they were going for in terms of the tone, the dynamic, the chemistry, that it might be a bit silly but it looked GOOD. and . i stand by this!

I know there are people who aren't enjoying it... there always are. There are also people who have beef with Force & Book's previous series who are carrying that prejudice into this show. (imo enchante's biggest crime was that filter they used. everyone looking weirdly smooth. freaky tbh.) (also the last 2 eps were basically unnecessary but let's not get into it.) I feel like I saw a lot of people esp. at the beginning making excuses for watching ABAAB - saying well of course it's not good it's not doing anything new, someone even saying 'it's so bad it's good' - which baffles me lol. SO not how I feel about it! it's good! if you like it just accept it; if it's not for you it's not for you.

any way . Force + Book have really nice chemistry, great at showing the characters' comfort / ease / gentle loving care for each other without a lot of fireworks or histrionics. And tbh not a lot of like - tension even! they're too comfortable for there to be tension! eg. the scene where Cher helps Gun unbutton his shirt and they both go very quiet about it. & the scene where Gun accidentally crashes cher's livestream and he's not even really mad about it. It feels kind of like My School President in the tone it's going for, in that it's a bit silly and light but there is some substance beneath it and it can be cute but actually not overly NICE. And it feels like it's progressing towards a more natural idea of how a relationship develops than certain older bl which can be a bit all or nothing (eg. i JUST watched tonhon chonlatee .. scream) And this is surely gmmtv's first office bl since Sotus S which was five years ago? w/ever I feel like this series is maybe a bigger deal than it looks. Also it's a perfect non stressful weekly watch. (really feel like i almost DIED watching NLMG week to week.) check back in with me in uhh six weeks or whenever it's done.

Our Dating Sim (South Korea 2023 / Viki) - watching bc people on my dash were really into it. I'm two eps in and it's well done but it's not making me CRAZY the way I always want to be made crazy. I do love the k-bl short series format and the k-bl style of storytelling often gets to me quite intensely so I'm hopeful.

Bokura no Shokutaku/ Our Dining Table (Japan 2023) - one ep in. made me crave onigiri soso bad. I haven't read the original manga so I am watching fresh, no expectations. the first ep was totally delightful.

SUCCESSION - watching it weekly with one of my siblings . if u follow me u will know I am deeply into it & even a little weird about it & have been since november 2020. hashtag tomgreg rights hashtag kenstewy rights hashtag tomshiv rights. here's my hot take: in some ways i think the most recent ep was BETTER than the previous one.

Riverdale - watching it weekly ... admittedly usually while doing something else eg cooking. Listen. Riverdale is.. not explainable in any sensible way. If you know you know. Many things about it are stupid and unbearable but its derangement is unparalleled and i appreciate that. Almost no one is a full 3-d character it's like watching puppets.

How To with John Wilson - I absolutely love this series, it's on iPlayer in the UK but I think it's originally HBO. ep 1.6 How To Make Risotto actually haunts me. framed as a series of tutorials, it veers and goes off on tangents, in form it's kind of like visual essays edited together from .. fairly random footage shot on the streets of New York. with a lot of visual gags.

Looking forward to watching soon -

Our Skyy 2 ... truly .... I am going to be so insufferable for the next eight weeks. I'm planning to watch all of it - the only series I haven't watched is Star In My Mind. i WAS most anticipating the ATOTS episodes because i just want to see phupha + tian again. But NLMG and Eclipse and MSP look like they're doing some absolutely wild & funky things so yeah i am excited for all of it.

Only Friends - I think they've just started work on it right? but yeah. looking forward to getting a little unhinged about this.

The Eighth Sense - tbh I think i'm going to wait for it to finish before I watch it. I need some of the discourse to die down a bit so I can go in with the right frame of mind.

Still deciding if I’m gonna watch

Probably most of the upcoming GMMTV series I'll at least try but generally I like to read a few reactions before going in.

tagging @phneltwrites @brofisting @missionlameturtle @hexenmeisterer

#My recommendation for getting into riverdale is actually. JUST watch season 3. if that takes then watch season 4. & then proceed in any orde #order. s1 doesn't give an accurate impression of the series as a whole #tv #bl drama #succession #riverdale #kdrama #thai drama #a boss and a babe #bokura no shokutaku #our dining table #our dating sim #our skyy 2 #the eighth sense #tag game #watchlist

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ocean-poetry · 7 months

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I wish you were here again

I wish you were here again :(

It's not the first time I've been home since you died, but still, it hasn't been easy

I remember you so much. The things we used to do, the way you used to are for me.

I saw the bench in the park on the hill where you used to smoke weed with Anika. I saw the theater where we used to hang out after class.

They're only a couple blocks from each other! It's crazy how close everything is here.

Farther out, I remember the hill behind the high school that you showed me. Ive been there so many times, but every time I say "death hill" I still think of you

I go there a lot. With people I care about. It's my favorite spot to look at the city at night. I don't know if you ever got to see the view, but it's great! Especially on the fourth of July. You can see like 3 different fireworks show from one spot!

Unfortunately some dumb ass bought the property in front of it and fenced off most of it. The actual spot on the hill with the tree is still there, but I'm sure youd hate it just as much as I do.

What makes me saddest though is when I'm downtown and I see that gazebo. It's not something you ever got to make many memories with me at, though I do remember some.

I remember when we were walking home from the carnival, and we were passing by the park the gazebo is In.

Some creepy guy in his car kept staring at us. It was like 3 am, and there were no cars and he was just sitting at a stop sign. I remember you shouted 'do you fucking want something?' And he drove away. I always admired how brave you were for your friends.

I'm sure if you were with me in college you would've pushed me to meet more. Mind you COVID n all so idk. But idk. You would've told me I keep going, n pushing on. That I'm not alone. I just wish more people said that to you.

Y'know that gazebo was where Danny and I held a vigil for you. We had no idea what we were doing, I just picked a spot n a date. A week past the day of your death.

I was going crazy messaging people, just trying to figure it out. But a lot of people were down to show up. The day of, the gazebo was packed!

There were like 50 people there to honor you! We couldn't all fit in the gazebo at once haha. Your mom was there too.

We took turns talking about you. Telling each other stories that we loved about you. There were so many good ones. People started crying, saying the "flickering of the light was a sign that you were there" and some nonsense. Maybe you were, but I think you would've rolled your eyes at how corny it was.

So many people loved you. Even just people who saw you everyday n noticed you were gone. I loved you. Even when you moved schools. Even when we stopped talking, I still cared. I wore that bracelet you gave me every single day until it couldn't hold itself together.

When it was my turn to talk I couldn't think of what to say. I didn't feel like I deserved to. Honestly, Anika and her mom were there. It was really awkward considering all the drama, but in that moment it didn't really matter.

We both lost a friend, and that mattered more than whatever bullshit happened between us (it was my fault though). She gave me a hug after everyone left and it was nice. I'm sure that would've made you happy. It's just crushing it took you dying for us to make amends.

Even besides Anika, I wasn't even sure what I was to you. I honestly kept thinking we'd go to the fair once we graduated. When it came down to it, Sidney was the one who told me. It was so strange to me.

These people I knew and who barely knew you were sobbing. But no one asked how I was? It was like no one knew that I knew you. But I did!

You were the only one I was still friends with. The only one. And I treasured you. And you were gone.

When it came down to my turn, I didn't have anything to say because I frankly had no idea whether what I felt was even true. Whether I was deluding myself.

That I was just some kid you saw every now n then. But you were my damn best friend. You, Anika, Thayne, Natalie, all of you were my best friends. And I lost all of them, except you, and then I truly lost you.

I didn't have friends that I got to go trick or treating with. Not until I met you guys. You gave me a place to exist, a place to be comfortable.

I was silent before because I was scared that people would accuse me of not knowing you. I was scared because I couldn't talk out loud in front of them. But I can talk now. 5, almost 6 years since you died I can tell you how I feel.

I wish I knew you again. I wish you were here again.

I started smoking weed in college. I wish we got to smoke together. Y'know, all those times I said no in high school, it wasn't bc of you. I was waiting. I wanted to do it when we were older. I just wish I could've known that I wouldn't get the chance to.

You'd love how I've grown up. I wish I could tell you. Tell you about the kinks I'm into, tell you how I think I'm polyamorous. Which I know you'd like. I remember you'd always tell me about your ot3's n that those were your preferred.

I still remember the grin you'd have when you'd talk about gay stuff n yaoi. I remember the shock you n Anika had when I told you I already watched the yaoi you suggested. It was honestly one of the best moments of my life!

I remember your enthusiasm and your strength. The way you'd defend your friends and stick up for them. The way you'd help me out when no one else would.

But I also remember how much you hurt. I remember hearing people who just fucking hated you and I had no clue why. I wish they had been kinder to you. I wish I had known how much you needed help.

I thought you were stronger, that you could tough it out. But you couldn't. I honestly don't think you wanted to kill yourself. I think most people don't want to, they just let themselves get to a point in which they can't stop it. They've either stepped too far off to jump back, squeezed to hard on the trigger, or tied it just too tightly to get it undone. I'm sure you wanted to live, to see me again.

Since you died Ive been living with so much depression. Ive wanted to die so fucking badly. To see you again. It hurts. I've tied ropes around my neck, put razors to my skin, hell I even carved a sliver of my wrist away. But I never let myself go to far. Never put myself in a situation where I can let myself go too far.

And it's cuz I can't do to others what you did to me. To us. To everyone at that gazebo who was aching and crying because of the loss. We fucking loved you. We cared about you. We sobbed until we couldn't, and by fucking god we shouldve done that all while you were alive but sweet fuck I had no idea you would ever go that far.

Were you high when you died? Was it the weed that gave you the courage, or sap you of the sanity? Were you thinking clearly as you did it? Knowing what would happen?

All I can do is hope you weren't but fuck I don't know. You told me we would go to the carnival again. I never heard from you the year after, so I assumed we'd go the next year. Was it me? Was I too late? Should I have reached out?

The worst part of it all is that I know now how you felt. I can feel it in my soul. I hate myself so fucking much sometimes that I can't survive with that pain.

I hate myself for being a loser in college and ignoring my cool roommates bc I was scared they wouldn't like me bc they were the coolest people I ever met. I hate myself for not being able to tell anyone how much I hurt, bc I don't want them to hurt from it too.

This is agony. I hate myself so much, but I can't tell people out of fear that my depression will rub off on them, or turn them away from me.

I'm scared that when I tell them that "I feel so alone sometimes that I want to curl up into a ball and lay there for hours n block the world out" all they'll hear is a cry for attention. Wanting attention isn't a bad thing, but everyone treats it like it is.

I wish I could tell you how much I'm hurting. I wish I could tell you that I feel like I'm following in your footsteps. I wish you could break me out of my loop, to knock sense into me. But you're not alive to.

And if there's one thing I learned when you died, it's that people might care about you, but they won't care enough to say it until you kill yourself. But I need it. I need to hear that stuff. That I'm fine. That people like me and want to be my friend. I'm scared that I'm never going to make any more friends.

I went to college and major in Psychology so I could help keep people from killing themselves. You were my inspiration. The thing that drove me to it. And I am grateful, even if the means was horrible.

But now I think it might have been a mistake. I talk to people and they look at me like I'm an alien. Like I can't talk to them. People somehow expect all psychology people to know how to talk like therapists, so it I ever bring up something I learned people are always like "well uh dipshit if you knew psychology youd know there are better ways to talk about" like okay fucker 1st it I said it that way you'd be more suspicious and 2nd WHY IM NOT YOUR THERAPIST. Okay

I never went to a party in college. I never saw anything. I saw Sylvie though. I think you knew her cuz she was friends with Sidney but she kinda just ignored me. She said she'd text me so we could smoke together sometime since it was my last quarter... but she didn't :(

Maybe I just don't deserve friends. And frankly with the way I smoke and the way my depression is, I doubt I'd make a good therapist. I'd like to do research tho! It's just. Every time I feel decent about my life something comes up and makes me just hate myself.

Sometimes it's hot men reminding me what I'm not. Sometimes it's my friend Patrick reminding me that not only do I have no friends from college, but I also don't have any kink friends from events bc I'm too anxious to go there.

My life feels duct taped together, and though I'm glad with what I did - I'm happy where I got to go to college n that I have an awesome boyfriend - but I'm constantly reminded that all that I've accomplished is just the bare minimum. I should've done so much more. I'm 23 already. It feels like once I finally find my voice I'll be too old for people to care about.

I wish I had friends to talk to like I did with you :( I just wanna go hang out with people who smoke weed. Talk to them about hating myself. Be genuine n honest. Someone who knows how I feel. But idk. I don't think there's anyone out there who'd wanna talk to me about this stuff.

I just. My life feels duct taped together. I don't think I ever told you this, but my dad had dimentia. I should've :( you weren't doing good after your dad died. I was selfish. I figured bc I was fine with my dad leaving my life you'd be fine with yours. But you weren't. N I was probably one of the few people that could relate. N I just never told you what happened.

I wish I could've found someone in college. A friend. To take me to cool parts of the forest, show me where to smoke weed. Talk to me about life, n all the cool parts of the world. Discuss how agonizing it is to exist, n the pains of depression. N the joys of being queer n existing. I just need something like that again.

Something. But I don't think it'll ever happen. Tried making friends with a boy named Johny but he was super closeted n like even when I was graduating he barely wanted to hang out n when we did hed just pretend he didn't know me :(

I miss my trans roommates. They were sick. You would've loved em. Had some of the best styles I've ever seen. It's funny like on the one hand I adore like sapphic style but on the other I was sexually abused by a woman so my view of womanhood is warped. So like. Any desire for womanhood would have been scrapped by it. But still it's cool. Idk what I'm talking about anymore. I'm so confused. I barely talked to em when I was there anyways so it's not like I really deserve to hear from em again..

I miss you so much. I wish I had someone to talk to like you again :(

#my poems #authors note: turns out i was hungry

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badapricot · 3 years

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Sorry this is a sticky question, but new to BL here and I've come across a lot of mewgulf hype. Like they're inescapable. My ig and yt feeds are full of them and I've never actively gone looking for them. I guess once you watch one bl your socials just get sucked into the BL vortex.

Anyway my question is, because I've seen a lot of mewgulf stuff, unintentionally albeit, but I've seen a lot of it, and chemistry wise I do agree they have some professor x level concoction going on. And I read your mewart post on all the drama that went down before mewgulf... Anyway my real question is (god why is it so hard to get to the point for me 🙄)... 🥁 Is there any truth to mewgulf or is it pure fantasy?

Like I don't wanna arm twist you into answering this extremely uncomfortable question, but I'm just really really curious and it's hard to find an unbiased and objective opinion in a circle of shippers. I'm not a real-people shipper, I stick to fictional couples only, but those two are just on a whole different level of fantasy building, they might be deserving of Oscars for how convincing they are. (Oscars are shit tho but they are still considered gold std because of hollywood industrial complex but I digress.)

This is a sticky topic because Waanjais are pretty crazy and intense but I’ll try to answer this the best I can. I was a pretty firm MewGulf “believer” up until December 2020 when a bunch of issues started happening between them.

The vague timeline on when their relationship started going south:

Mew started totally ignoring Gulf on social media.

On the day of Gulf’s GMM BOYFRIEND concert, Mew posted a “Good luck bro” message to Gulf on top of a picture of the flowers he’d gotten him. Not weird at all, but fans were joking about how it seemed like they’d fought because Mew would usually call Gulf the Thai equivalent of darling.

Gulf had an issue where crazy fans were starting rumours that he hooked up with a dancer from his concert just because they had a sexy dance routine together. Mew posted a photo with a sun emoji on IG and Gulf replied with a sunflower comment. This is because they’ve turned sun and sunflower into a shipping brand. Mew replied with a rude emoji and then posted a coded message on his IG story that said “Every time you have problems you use me. It’s not cool at all bro”. It’s not hard to figure out that he was shading Gulf for “using him” to distract from his scandal, especially after he recently called Gulf “bro” which he never has.

Mew and Gulf had a really awkward live in December 2020 where the whole comment section was full of fans pointing out that they were fighting, and they were reading the comments with the MC.

Mew got home and blew up at a MewGulf fan who said he was unprofessional for his behaviour during the live.

Mew ignored Gulf’s New Year’s greetings and thanked everyone under the sun, including their Mom’s, but totally left Gulf out of them (despite Gulf being his partner of two years) and he ended it with a shady comment about “leaving people behind in the New Year”.

Mew deleted 90% of his and Gulf’s couple photos on IG.

Mew and Gulf had a lot of really awkward lives together as soon as 2021 started.

Mew totally ignored the Waanjai MewGulf anniversary even though their fans bought a firework show for them. Meanwhile, Gulf made a video visiting all the fansites and he did a live during the fireworks show where he gave away cookies to fans. When Mew was asked about fireworks in an interview, he pretended that it was a gift just for him and not for him and Gulf.

Mew’s sails had the wind taken out of them after he was nationally clowned for 8 days by NCTzens because his cover MV was accused of plagiarism.

Mew recently unfollowed CH3 right after they posted Gulf’s teaser (Gulf was recently signed under them).

Gulf did an interview with CH3 where he was asked if Mew had congratulated him for joining CH3 and his answer was, “Maybe?”

Mew tried to blame Gulf and CH3 for MewGulf not having a fanmeet in 2021, even though he himself said he’s booked for the next year.

I’m probably missing more details because I’ve left the fandom but since his NCT issue, Mew has generally gone back to being polite to Gulf at least in public, but he’ll still occasionally do or say shady things about Gulf, while Gulf treats him with the expected professional respect.

I don’t know if they dated or if it was just a crush or a work romance, but I do think there was something romantic between them because I’ve “known” Mew for 3+ years and he’s a really emotional and erratic person. He lashed out at Gulf, the exact same way that he lashed out at Art. He wouldn’t have done all those things to Gulf if they weren’t involved in some way, but that’s just my personal opinion. Mew doesn’t shit where he works, unless he has feelings for his work. I also don’t think either of them are that good at acting. You can genuinely see that they had a lot of love for each other at some points.

As of now? I think they’re living in a friends to lovers to enemies AU and they’ve come to a professional understanding, because Mew can’t handle more scandal at this point, and Gulf doesn’t want any. I think they’ll continue to work together cordially until their couple contracts end, and then they’ll eventually split professionally. I don’t think they’re currently dating and I don’t even think they’re friends.

#mewgulf #mew suppasit #gulf kanawut #asks #Anonymous

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