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sparkinsidewrites · 4 years

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sparkinside master list

Blacking the Looking Glass {Adam Carson/Davey Havok}

Sometimes its easier to hide than to face who we truly are. Caught between honesty and fear, Davey is forced to make a choice.

Culpabilité {Adam Carson/Davey Havok; Adam Carson/OFC; AU}

A glimpse into a life shattered. (warnings: character death; grief; alcohol abuse; depression)

Échec Et Mat {Adam Carson/Davey Havok; NSFW}

He may have lost the battle, but there wasn't a chance in hell he'd forfeit the war.

Hearts in Pain {Adam Carson/Hunter Burgan; Adam Carson/OFC; AU}

The choices we make have long reaching consequences, whether we choose to face them or not. (warnings: cheating/extramarital affair)

Brave {Adam Carson/Davey Havok; AU}

Truth has a funny way of coming out. Especially at four in the morning.

The House Wins {Hunter Burgan/Jade Puget; NSFW; AU}

You don't have to be alone to be lonely, you might as well give in.

Reflections {Adam Carson/Hunter Burgan}

In the dark, its easy to look back on our choices and wonder where everything went so horribly astray.

Coffee Date {Adam Carson/Jade Puget; Fluff}

It really should not have been this complicated. It was just a simple question. Any idiot could do it. So why was he having such a rough time with it?

Désastre {Adam Carson/Jade Puget; Fluff}

Sometimes the worst possible outcome can have the best possible results.

Lonely {Adam Carson/Hunter Burgan; AU}

Friends for years, Adam Carson and Hunter Burgan had faced college, med school, and the real world. But can one night and one impulsive action change everything.

Some Days I Wish I Didn’t Have A Tongue {Adam Carson/Hunter Burgan; AU}

The truth has a funny way of coming about. Sequel/Companion piece to 'Lonely'

We’re Recording {Hunter Burgan/Jade Puget; NSFW}

Jade decides Hunter has been working far too hard, especially on Christmas, and drops in to offer a much needed distraction.

When You Catch Fire {Davey Havok/Hunter Burgan}

You can only push someone so far before everything falls apart. Written with Chaosti.

Minutiae {Adam Carson/OFC}

Adam finds himself musing one night on tour.

Promise {Hunter Burgan/OFC}

Memories fill their home and wading through them is harder than she ever could have imagined. (warnings: major character death; grief; loss)

Snow Day {Hunter Burgan/Female Reader; NSFW}

Playing in the snow.

I’m Good For Nothing Will You Love Me Just The Same? {Hunter Burgan/Female Reader; Hunter Burgan/Smith Puget; NSFW}

The trails and tribulations of a complicated friendship

Patience {Davey Havok/Jade Puget; NSFW}

A test in patience makes for a fun morning.

The Last Time {Adam Carson/Davey Havok; NSFW}

He always swore it would be the last time. So why does he keep finding himself back here?

Anymore {Adam Carson/Jade Puget; Adam Carson/OFC}

There are two sides to every story. Companion to ‘The Embrace’

Tell Tale Signs {Adam Carson/Davey Havok}

Endings are never easy.

Rhythm {Adam Carson/Davey Havok}

Some times all it takes is the right incentive.

Deconstructing Gods {Adam Carson/Davey Havok; Davey Havok/Jade Puget}

You can only push someone so far.

Truth or Consequence {Adam Carson/Hunter Burgan; NSFW}

The truth is he’d always been a coward. (warnings: cheating/extramarital affair)

A collection of vignettes featuring various pairings. (warnings: cheating, alcohol abuse, domestic violence, death)

One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve

Davey is the sole witness to a brutal murder. Adam Carson is the agent assigned to protect him. When the lines between duty and love blur, trouble is the only outcome. Written with Havoksangel. (warnings: murder, violence, sexual assault) Complete

One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen

{Adam Carson/OFC; Adam Carson/Davey Havok} Faith and fear are two of the strongest forces in our lives. Adam had never questioned himself or his beliefs. But what happens when he stumbles across his greatest temptation in the eyes of another man? Written with Havoksangel. (warnings: cheating) Complete

One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen Seventeen Eighteen

{Adam Carson/Davey Havok} Creating a balance between what was and what is strains the ever twisted relationship between Adam, Aubrey, and Davey. Sequel to The Devil Inside. Written with Havoksangel. Complete

One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine

{Adam Carson/OFC} There are always lines, always limits, and learning when to cross them, when to risk it all can be the hardest lesson to learn. In-Complete

One Two

{Adam Carson/Jade Puget; Character Study} There were several things Jade had always been sure of and his relationship with Adam had always been one of them. But people and situations change and most times no one is prepared for the fallout. Complete

{Adam Carson/OFC; Hunter Burgan/Jade Puget; Davey Havok} In a time of devestating war and destruction, five young children witnessed their world come crashing down before them. Twenty years later, they have risen above the chaos to lead their once war-torn land, Allyria, into an era of peace. But the serenity they have brought may only be the calm before the storm as a powerful force from beyond their kingdom threatens to tear their world, their kingdom and their lives apart. Can they rise above the wreckage or will Allyria fall into the darkness building steadily on the horizon? Written with FadingStar. (warnings - Graphic depictions of violence, death) In-Complete

Prelude:12 | Prelude:21 | One

#sparkinside master list #afislash #advey #javey #hunvey #jadam #The Embrace #Shards of Us #The Truth Can't Save You Now #The Devil Inside #This Glassy Surface #RPF #I'll Be There For You

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sparkinsidewrites · 4 years

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Shards of Us - Chapter Eight

Title: Shards of Us

Chapter: 8/9

Character/Pairing: Davey Havok/Adam Carson

Genre: Angst

Rating: Explicit

Summary: Creating a balance between what was and what is strains the ever twisted relationship between Adam, Aubrey, and Davey. Sequel to The Devil Inside. Written with Havoksangel.

Authors Notes/Warnings: Nothing in this piece ever happened. I claim no ownership nor do I make any sort of profit from this, other than pride and a sense of amusement.

EIGHT

Aubrey had never felt so exhausted in her life, nor more fulfilled. A soft smile played on her lips as she found herself staring down at her tiny daughter sleeping peacefully in her arms. She was amazed at just how much this little girl resembled her father. It was both a blessing and a curse. Sighing, Aubrey closed her eyes and leaned her head back on the pillows behind her. It was a little after four in the afternoon and she felt like it was far later.

Davey came up to the door, knocking softly. He knew Adam had stepped out for a bit to take care of things at Aubrey's, making sure that everything was just right for the baby when she got home. He figured this was the best place and time to discuss where he and Aubrey stood. He knew he couldn’t leave things hanging so uncertainly. Not if this was going to work. He refused to tear this family apart anymore than he had.

Her head raised at the sudden sound, eyes locking on the figure standing in the doorway. A plethora of emotions flitted through her as she stared. "Davey," she started, neutrally, unsure of her own feelings at the moment. The little girl in her arms stirred but did not wake.

"Can I come in?" He whispered so he wouldn’t wake the baby. "I thought we should talk."

Aubrey nodded silently. She was still uneasy around him. Still unsure. But he had been there for her. Helped her. She didn't know what to make of him.

Quietly he walked in and took a seat next to the bed. He peered over at the baby and smiled. "She's beautiful."

"She looks like Adam."

Davey nodded in agreement. "Have you two named her yet?"

Aubrey shook her head, "No. Adam and I haven't really...settled on anything yet. " They would need to soon, though, she noted. This little one could spend the rest of her life as baby girl Carson.

"Aubrey... I can’t not be in her life," he said, his voice soft and almost pleading. "I watched her come into this world. I can’t not see her."

Davey's sudden change in demeanor and attitude startled her for a moment. He wanted to be a part of her daughter's life. She could understand that. But she still felt uneasy about the situation. It was selfish, she knew it, but she couldn't help fear he would replace her in that aspect as well. And that was something she knew she would not be able to handle.

He locked eyes with her. "I know she is your daughter and I know she is Adam's, and I promise not to step over any lines," he began slowly, cautiously, "but please let her be a part of my life. She is a part of Adam and..." he trailed off, tears welling up. "Don’t punish him for what I caused him to do."

Aubrey swallowed thickly, closing her eyes "I'm not trying to punish anyone...I just...This is hard for me. I trusted him...I trusted you and I'm scared to do that again. It's not just my life anymore, it's hers."

Davey nodded. "I know I betrayed you and I know he did, but I have changed. I have. Being with Adam, loving him, has made me a better person. I swear I will never hurt her. Or you."

"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I just...You are asking for something I don't know if I'm fully ready to offer. I know you aren't a horrible person, but I don't know if I trust you enough to be alone with my daughter." Or if I can ever fully trust either of you again.

"You don’t have to trust me alone with her, but let her come to the house with Adam," Davey pleaded.

"Davey..." Aubrey started. It was too soon for her to even consider letting her daughter out of her sight, much less let her spend the night away from her. This was all new for her. She couldn’t contemplate anything beyond this hospital room. Not now.

He looked down. He'd hoped this would help, but he was getting nowhere. She didn’t trust him, maybe she never would. It hurt that she would do this, but as much as he wanted to, he couldn’t blame her for it. Not really. He took a deep breath and looked up. "This was a mistake. I'm sorry."

"Stop," she started softly, unsure of herself, but knowing she couldn’t let things carry on this way, "Baby steps. I need to take all of this in baby steps."

Davey nodded and clasped his hands in his lap. He really shouldn’t have come in here. He was a fool to think that she would change her mind, no matter how much he'd helped her. He wiped away tear a before it had the chance to fall, keeping his eyes down.

"I don't want her alone with anyone right now. She's still brand new, this is all new for me. I just..I need some time to adjust to being a mother. Maybe when she's few months old she can stay with Adam for a bit...But it's just...It's too soon."

Davey again nodded. "I just don’t want him to miss out on her life because of me," he whispered. Slowly, he stood, heading for the door.

"I don't want him to miss it either." Sighing softly, she added, "Thank you. For everything."

He smiled and leaned down, kissing the top of her head. "You're welcome."

Closing her eyes for a moment, Aubrey fought against the small voice in her mind and asked, "Would…would you like to hold her?" As difficult as it was to ask, Aubrey knew it was the least she could do. He could have just left her to get to the hospital herself. To give birth herself. But he hadn't. She still didn't understand why.

He looked at her, mouth parted in shock. Yes, he wanted to hold her. "Are you sure?"

Aubrey nodded. Baby steps, she told herself. She smiled softly at him, waiting for him to take a seat in one of the nearby chairs, before gently placing her slumbering daughter in his arms.

Davey pulled the chair closer and held his arms out for her. He couldn’t believe that Aubrey was actually going to let him hold the baby. He figured he wouldn’t get within ten feet of her.

This was incredibly difficult for Aubrey. It nearly took everything she had to not simply grab the child back. But she did not. Doing so wouldn't solve anything, nor would it be safe for her child. "Support her head and don't rock her too much. She doesn't like that."

Davey nodded, cradling her against his body. He smiled down at her face, her sweet little face, and traced her cheek with his finger tip. "Hi, Sweetheart," he whispered

The baby stirred, slowly blinking her blue eyes. She wiggled a little before her eyes drooped closed once more.

"She's so precious, Aubrey."

"I know she is," Aubrey whispered, smiling softly.

Davey lightly touched her little hand only to have her grab it and give it a tiny squeeze. From that touch, he felt tears welling in his eyes. He was holding a miracle in his arms.

Aubrey laughed slightly at the sight. "She's got quite a grip, doesn't she?"

All he could do was nod. He couldn’t even look up because he wasn’t able to take his eyes off of the baby.

Davey had fallen head over heels in love with the little girl in his arms, that Aubrey could tell easily. And she couldn't blame him, for her little one had stolen her heart as well. Absently she wondered just what she would do once she and her baby had made it back home.

True, her mother had offered to take her in, to help raise the child. Aubrey had refused before, stating that she would have Adam's help raising her daughter though it had only earned her a lecture on morals and what it meant to be a fit parent.

It was the only thing they could never see eye to eye on. Even after all Adam had done, he would be a wonderful father and Aubrey knew that. But at the same time she knew Adam would not be able to be there whenever she needed him. He'd try his best, that she knew, but he had a new life now. New responsibilities. Maybe she should have taken her mother's offer. She just didn't know.

"What do you need for her?" Davey asked.

Confusion spread across Aubrey's face, "What?"

"Is there anything you need for her that you don’t have?"

"Some extra help here and there. I'm going to need to put in a lot more hours at work to make sure she gets everything she needs. More hours in a day?" she joked with a sigh, though wishing there was some way there could be.

Davey looked at her. "You don’t have to hire a sitter. Whenever you feel you trust me, I'll change my shifts at the cafe. I'll work nights and watch her if you need." He knew he sounded hopeful, maybe overly so, but he wanted this. Wanted to be a part of this if she would let him.

Aubrey smiled lightly, "Maybe." She was far from ready for that. But maybe...maybe a bit later down the road. It would be nice not having to worry about finding the money to pay for a sitter. Struggle through finding one that she felt safe leaving her child with. Someone Adam felt safe leaving their child with.

Davey looked up as the door opened, seeing Adam poke his head in. He was sure the man was going to die to see him holding his daughter.

To say he was caught off guard by the sight before him would have been a gross understatement. Davey was holding his daughter. Aubrey was letting him hold their daughter. The very idea of it melted his heart. He could still sense the tension between them, something he knew would always linger, but this was a sight he never expected to see. Maybe things would work themselves out after all. "Hey," he called softly, terrified of disturbing them.

Aubrey smiled at him. "Hey." After a short pause, she added, "She seems to like Davey." She was trying her best to make this work. This little girl didn’t need the stress of angry adults. She needed a happy life and in order for Aubrey to give her that, she was going to have to bend a little. No matter how uncertain she was.

Adam merely nodded, unsure what to say. This was honestly the last thing he had expected. "She does," he murmured, taking a few cautious steps towards the hospital bed. Gently, he rested his hand on Davey's shoulder, conscious of his actions, still unsure how long this peace would last.

Davey looked up at Adam, smiling. "She's gonna look like you, she has your eyes. And Aubrey's hair."

Smiling, Adam gently rubbed Davey's shoulder before reaching down to stroke his daughter's head. His little girl. He was a father. It was something he still was trying to wrap his head around. Her tiny eyes slowly blinked open and a smile spread across her face. She smiled at him and his heart completely melted.

Aubrey watched the two for a moment and couldn’t help but feel sadness that this wasn’t something she was going to be able to share with Adam the way she'd always thought she would. Davey was going to have that, but she couldn’t deny her little girl her father because of circumstances that were not her fault. That she could not control.

"Hey there, little one," Adam whispered, stroking his daughter's cheek. She was perfect. The one thing he had done right.

Slowly he raised his eyes, allowing them to fall on Aubrey's face. The sadness in her eyes shook him. It was something he knew he would never forgive himself for. But she was granting him this, the chance to be a father. To be involved in his daughter's life. Something he knew had to be one of the hardest things she had ever done.

Davey stood up and handed her back to Aubrey. He didn’t want to see clingy, though he loved that little girl already. "I think Mommy and Daddy need alone time. You need a name, Princess."

Aubrey smiled softly at Davey as she took her daughter back into her arms. She was so small. "Thank you," she murmured.

Davey smiled at her and winked before leaving. He knew the three of them needed time as a family.

Adam watched as his lover headed slightly towards the door before turning his attention back to Aubrey and the little girl she held in her arms. "He's right, you need a name, little one." He locked eyes with Aubrey.

Aubrey smiled. "I was thinking after our mothers."

"Natalie I think is lovely, but I would never condemn a child to the name Harriet," he joked, knowing his mother's name was something he refused to name his child. "Rose," he added after a few moments of silence. After his Grandmother. "Natalie Rose."

She grinned and kissed her head. "I think it fits. Natalie Rose."

Adam nodded, "It suits her." Slowly he leaned down, running his finger over the soft tufts of hair on his daughter's head. "My little Natalie." Natalie closed her eyes under his touched and drifted off to sleep in her mother's arms. "She's perfect."

Aubrey grinned at him softly. She was perfect and despite everything, this moment was perfect as well.

#afislash #Advey #Shards of Us #co-written with havoksangel #AU #sparkinside writes

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