#BITCH YOU ALREADY HAD A WHOLE SEASON TO YOURSELF | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ohniki · 3 months

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𝜗𝜚 Beginning of Us || s.jy

~ Sypnosis: It’s only when you leave that you begin to realize you need them

~ Genre: strangers to friends to lovers, college au, fluff, angst, smut

~ Warnings: Smut!! oral (f. receiving), missionary, doggy, fingering, bathtub sex, breast fondling, tummy bulge, unprotected sex, soft sex, rough sex, slight sub jake, trust issues, they are very toxic for each other mentions of infidelity, Jake being a dumbass bf 😒, alcohol consumption, aussie line (skz) cameo, oc is soooo delulu, she doesn’t know better 🤦🏻‍♀️, bestie sunoo n heeseung 🥹, heartbreak (on many different occasions) 😞, oc js wants to be loved 💔 major angst THEY ARE TOXIC FOR EACH OTHER

• currently playing: if it’s not you by PRYVT

~ wc: 21.7k

It is the start of exam season; the snow is starting to fall from the sky, and it’s become cloudy most days. The walk from your dorm to your class was so cold that you had double-layered for today’s weather. On your way to class, you get pushed back by someone. Before you could turn around to scold whoever it was, he bolted.

“Fucking bitch” you muttered under your breath. You only got a glimpse of his brunette hair and red jacket. He was tall and had a lean figure, he’s not someone you’ve seen around campus. Picking your things up you make your way over to class. Days like these make you regret not taking online courses.

After class, you texted your best friend Sunoo to meet you for lunch. The café you entered was warm; unlike outside, you ordered yourself a hot chocolate to warm your body up. After you pick up your order you bump into someone for the second time today, Looking up you see it's the same man who bumped into you earlier. The burning sensation of the hot chocolate hits your skin through your jacket. “Fuck,” you whisper under your breath “Watch where you’re going, asshole!” The man turns to your standing frame and frantically grabs napkins from the counter. “Oh god, I’m so sorry.” His eyes go wide as he pushes the napkins into your hand “Please let me buy you another one, I’ll even buy you a new jacket”. The voice that comes from his lips takes you by surprise.

He has an Australian accent; It’s an accent you haven’t heard from around here before. The unfamiliar voice sends shivers down your spine. Raising your head from your jacket to the man standing in front of you, you find dark brown eyes looking into yours; ‘he’s so pretty’ you think. You have to pause for a moment to search your mind for something to say back to him.

“Please, buying me new clothes is unnecessary, but I would appreciate it if you bought me another drink. Just watch where you’re going next time,” you tell him

“Yeah, of course. What did you order? I’ll pay for it,” He begins to pull his wallet out to get ready to pay for his and your order.

“A hot chocolate” He walks over to the barista and orders.

After paying for the food he turns to you again and bows his head down, a look of shame spread across his handsome face. “Look I’m sorry again”

“It’s okay really. Stop with the apologies, buying my drink is enough”

“Order for Jake!” the barista calls out.

After getting your drink from the boy, Jake, speaks up again.

“Can I take you out to lunch? For one last apology?”

Before you can answer him your phone rings. The name read ‘Sunoo’.

“Maybe another time, Jake” You smile at him and answer your phone.

Catching sight of Sunoo as you walk into the restaurant, Sunoo looks up from his phone and waves you down.

“Hey! Why are you so late I thought we said 12:30,” he says in a sassy tone.

“Something happened at the café I was at. Some guy bumped into me, and I spilled my drink all over myself. He ended up paying for it, but he asked me to lunch. I kinda told him no because I was already on my way to see your ass and I already had plans.” You explained the whole ordeal that had gone down.

“Was he cute?” he asked

“He was” You smile down at your fidgeting hands.

“He had an accent too; I don’t think he’s from around here,” you think out loud.

Sunoo looks at you with a dumbfounded face “Yeah, no shit Sherlock, of course, he’s not from around here. Who else have you met with an Australian accent around here” he rolls his eyes playfully.

You laugh at him. He begins to talk about how his day had gone so far. “Oh my god, Heeseung is driving me insane.” He talks about his roommate. “He’s been blasting his speaker so loud with his goddamn guitar while I’m studying for my thousands of upcoming tests.” He speaks with a sarcastic tone. “Sometimes I wish I said no to being roommates with him” Sunoo and Heeseung were the first friends you made at the new high school you went to during your senior year.

Being friends with them for a handful of time was like having a party every day. They’d drag you out of your house to get you away from studying and keep your mind off school for a while.

“Why don’t you tell him to shut up? It works when I do it” you shrug at him.

He tilts his head up and sighs. “It only works because it’s you, he always listens to you but not me” he gives a side-eye.

“Then I can’t help you there buddy” You ruffle his hair.

Thankfully, today your schedule was free. Your shift at the library didn’t start until one o’clock this afternoon so you were stuck studying for the rest of your tests you had coming up. It was only ten, and you called up Sunoo and Heeseung and asked if you could stay at their place until you had to go to work. Of course, they agreed and you made your way over.

The frost in the air hits your skin as you walk out of your apartment. The sky was gloomy, but the sun peeked through just a bit. Gloomy days always make you feel cozy. They made you want to stay inside and curl up in your blanket. But today you needed to be productive; you had shit to get done.

Walking up the stairs to their dorm you already had a spare key they gave you “in case of an emergency” as they said. You unlock the door and hear the obnoxious noise Sunoo was talking about, Heeseung’s electric guitar. When you walk in Sunoo is sitting on the floor working on top of the coffee table in front of the T.V. He was wearing a thick hoodie due to the cold air blowing through their room.

“Hey,” you shouted over the loudspeaker.

“Finally! Can you please tell him to turn off the speaker and shut the fuck up? I can’t fail this semester, or it’ll be the end of me.” Nodding your head at him you stomp your way to Heeseung’s room.

“HEESEUNG” you yell as loud as you can. He hears nothing. Too focused on his guitar you walk up to the plug of his speaker and unplug it.

“Hey!” before realizing that it’s you his expression changes.

“Oh, hi ___” he smiles at you.

Sunoo walks in behind you next to the door.

“Oh so, you listen to her and not me? You’re such a little shit.” He whips his head and walks back to the living room.

You snicker at him.

“We are trying to study. And you should be too, don’t you have exams coming up next week?” you ask.

“Yeah, but I wanted to practice playing a little before I started.”

You walk up to him and drag him by his arm to where Sunoo is waiting for you.

“Well practice is over, hurry and get your things. I’ll help you.” He sits down beside you and pouts as he takes his books from under the coffee table.

It’s been about two hours since you started your study session. It was almost time for you to leave for work.

“Okay, now that you know the formula for this make it into a simplified equation”

Heeseung looks at you with confusion written all over his face.

“Are you kidding me right now, Hee, we’ve been over this for the past hour how do you still not get it.” you deadpan.

“Because he doesn’t have a brain” Sunoo butts in.

You sigh heavily as you start to collect your things. Sunoo looks up at you and begs “No! Don’t leave me here with him. If you do, I’ll fail my exams because I’ve lost brain cells listening to him talk about nonsense.” You look down at where he’s sitting, and you laugh at him

“You’ll be fine, if anything come by the library and study there. I’ll be in until six. And you too.” you point a finger at Heeseung.

“We have books in there that will help with your exam,” you tell him.

“Alright, fine if you’re working tomorrow, we’ll swing by,” Heeseung says.

“Good. I’ll see you guys tomorrow then!”

You put your shoes on and your coat closing the door behind you. You make your way to the library.

“I hate you” Sunoo stares at Heeseung.

It’s getting closer to the time you’re supposed to clock in. Making it just a few minutes early you go through the door, and you’re hit with a gust of warm air. The library was packed with students. Now that it was getting closer to exam time, this was the busiest time in the library.

As you make your way behind the desk you meet with someone already sitting in your seat. It’s the same head of brunette hair you bumped into a few days ago. Walking towards him, he catches you from the corner of his eye and smiles at you.

“Hey” you smile at him

“Oh, hey. Sorry, I didn’t mean to stay this long for overtime” he apologizes.

“It seems every time we meet you’re always apologizing for something.” you chuckle

“Yeah, sorry about that” you laugh at him this time.

“No, it’s okay. It’s cute” At that he smiles. His cheeks are rosy from the blush.

“So, when did you start working here?” you ask him to make conversation.

“I started working here a few days ago actually” You get distracted by his accent. There was something about you and your accents. You had always found them attractive. And his face? God, he was so pretty; you couldn’t take your eyes off him. Shaking out of your daydreams you snap back to reality.

“Oh, so that’s why I haven’t seen you around here,” you say curiously

“Yeah, I just transferred here from Australia. I had better opportunities here.”

“Ah, I see. How do you like it so far over here?” you ask him. You had never met a foreigner before; he seemed like an interesting person to you and you wanted to know more about him.

“Did you move here with your family or are you on your own?” you look at him. He speaks to you while holding eye contact.

“No, I’m not alone actually. Her name is Layla. I brought her with me, so I wasn’t by myself.” Your heart sinks a little. You expected him to be single since he offered to take you out for lunch.

Curiously you ask, “How long have you been with her?”

“Ever since she was born,” he says

What? Is he? No.

“I’m sorry what?” caught off guard you ask him “What do you mean since birth”

He looks at you and laughs “She’s my dog. I’ve had her since she was a puppy”

Your eyes widen. How embarrassing, of course, he has a dog named Layla. You laugh loudly at your mistake

“Oh my god, I thought... ugh this is so embarrassing.”

“Nothing to be embarrassed about” he shakes his head slightly and reassures you

“What about you? Do you have any pets?”

“No, I don’t” you chuckle

“I do have two best friends though, Sunoo and Heeseung”

“They’re guys?” he gives you a look that makes you feel slightly off, but you shake it off.

“Yep! I take care of them, make sure they’re doing well.” You say sarcastically. “They’re my best friends. They’re like my older brothers, they look out for me, you know?”

The conversation flows as you continue to talk to him. You don’t notice the time flying by when you look out the window near the front desk. Your eyes graze over to the clock and it’s already past the time you were supposed to clock out.

Hastily collecting your things and pushing the chairs in as you stand up and walk over to the lights. “Sorry, I spent so much time talking about myself I didn’t even notice the time passed by” you chuckle nervously.

“No, don’t apologize. I enjoyed spending my time with you. Plus, barely anyone walked through the door today. Helped pass the time”

When you smile up at him your cheeks flush with red. Eyes rising to look at him up close made you realize how handsome he was. You notice his prominent cheekbones when he smiles. And the glow in his eyes in the light of the lamp next to the desk.

Checking back into reality, you both make sure everything is shut off before leaving.

“I think we should head out now, it’s getting pretty late, and I have an early class tomorrow.”

“Yeah, me too,” he says softly. He bends down to pick up his bag from the floor. Jake throws it over his shoulders and turns the last light out on the desk.

As you make your way through the door you’re hit with the cool breeze of December air. You turn to Jake and look up into his eyes. The moonlight hits him just right. Highlighting his prominent cheekbones and his bright brown eyes. It’s quiet for a moment. You don’t realize how close you have gotten to him. Breaths inches apart. Your eyes glide down to his lips for a second before you catch his eyes again.

“So, I’ll see you on Wednesday then?” a smile slowly appearing across his face.

“Yeah, I’ll see you”

You nod your head and head back to your dorm. He regrets not asking for your number that night.

Your morning was off to a horrendous start; you had woken up late and ended up being late to class for about thirty minutes. The lecture was an hour long, so you still had time to get some information out of it. You had been so tired the night before you had overslept and missed your alarm.

Rushing out of your door, you had forgotten to prepare your breakfast the night before. There was no time to stop now. When you walk through the door of the auditorium the door slams shut behind you and all eyes are on you. Embarrassingly walking over to your seat the professor calls for your name, “Please if you’re going to be late, try to do it quietly. I don’t need you distracting my students” Bowing your head slightly your ears turn red out of embarrassment.

You silently walk past a few students with your head down. Jake discreetly looks at you from one of the seats closer to the top. He smiles at the way you cover your face as you look for a seat. Finally, you sit down and listen to what's left of the lesson.

Walking out of class, you hear heavy footsteps from behind you. Your name comes out of someone’s mouth and you look over your shoulder to find the culprit.

“Hey,” Jake puts his arm around your shoulder.

Looking up at him, he has a smile on his face as he looks down at you.

“I’ve been meaning to ask you if you wanted to hang out, you know, outside of work?”

Your face lights up at the suggestion. He takes notice of the bright glimmer in your eyes. Moving your head down you laugh lightly and tuck your hair behind your ear

“Yeah, sure. I’d like that” turning your head up to look at him.

“Okay great, are you free this afternoon? For lunch?” he asks

You pause to think about the mental calendar you have set in your head.

“Uhm, let me check”

Not recalling any texts or calls from Sunoo you smile up at him

“Yes, I can do this afternoon,” you say to him.

He smiles to himself; he can hear his heart beating in his head. The adrenaline pumps through his veins as he thinks about things he can do to spend his time with you.

“Okay, cool. I’ll see you around twelve?”

“Yeah”

“Meet me at the coffee shop near the science building,” he finally decides as he slowly moves his arm from your shoulder. You nod your head and make your way to your next class as you part ways. When you stop in your step you realize you don’t have his number. Before you could call out for his name he had already disappeared to class. You’ll just have to wait for him to show up.

It was nearing lunchtime; some students had already left campus. After walking out of class your feet guide you to the coffee shop Jake had told you to meet him at. Today’s weather was nicer than most days. It was sunny outside but still somewhat cold. Turning the corner of the building you see the coffee shop, but no sign of Jake.

When you stand outside many people walk past you. It was now 12:20. You turn around from where you’re standing and that’s when you see Jake running around the corner. Slowing down his pace you realize he is out of breath from running.

“I’m sorry I’m late,” he says catching his breath. You stare at him as you wait for him to explain.

“Professor had me stay in to help him sort out some documents and I didn’t pay attention to the time, and I didn’t have your number to text you”

Deciding to let him off the hook you chuckle lightly and place a hand over his shoulder to reassure him.

“It’s okay, I was planning on asking for your number when you asked me out today, but you were gone before I could even ask you,” you tell him softly.

“Sorry about that too, I was going to ask you that day at the library, but I chickened out,” he admits

“Well give me your phone, so we have some sort of communication when we're not together” You hold your hand out for him. He pulls his phone out and hands it to you.

When you hand it back to him, he reads your name with a butterfly emoji. Smiling down at his phone he hears your phone ding with an unknown number. You save it as Jake’s number.

“There, now if we need something we can call or text each other!” you say with enthusiasm

He shakes his head at you and guides you into the café. You walk in and find a seat to sit at, Jake ends up pulling your chair out at the table near the window. Thanking him you place your jacket on the back of your seat and he takes his seat, and you spark up the conversation.

“How are your classes so far? Have the professors given you a hard time?” you ask him. He waits to respond, thinking about his answer.

“They’ve been a bit stressful; I just think it’s because I’ve transferred so late into the year. And the professors? They’re just like every other professor, assign way too many assignments and look like they don’t want to be there.”

You laugh at that.

“What about you? Are you from around this area?” He asks you the question this time.

“I’m originally from Cali, I applied for college over here because I’ve always wanted to explore Korea,” you tell him.

“One of my friends had told me about his trip here and it sounded like he had so much fun,”

“Ah, well both of my parents are from here.” He explains. “I wanted to get to know more of where I come from. They moved us over to Australia when I was about five years old” Thinking about his hometown, he begins to miss his mom’s homemade food and his old hometown friends.

“I’ve wanted to travel to a bunch of places. I just never found the time.”

He begins to go on about the exciting places he wishes to adventure. You spend most of your afternoon with him. You’re starting to enjoy spending your time with him and you end up asking him to hang out again the next day.

As you walk out of the café the cold air hits you once again.

“I have to get going for my next class. But if you’re free, do you maybe, wanna hang out again tomorrow?”

“Yeah, yeah I’d like that.” he smiles at you

“Okay great! I’ll see you around the same time as today, then?”

“Yes, and I’ll make sure to make it on time” Laughing at him you nod your head.

“Bye, Jake”

You walk away and make your way over to class.

Exams were getting closer, but on the brighter side winter break was just around the corner. You and Jake had been hanging out a lot more since that day he asked you out to lunch. Your shift at the library started and you had Sunoo and Heeseung stick around to study one last time. Heeseung agreed–against his will, to tag along but he’d much rather practice his guitar skills than be at the stupid library studying for exams.

Jake told you he wouldn’t be in today because he had to sort some things out in one of his professors’ classes. You agreed to take on double the time in his place.

Sunoo and Heeseung sat at the table near the front desk where you were sitting. You were talking about classes when Sunoo suddenly brought up Jake’s name.

“What’s going on between you two?” he asked

“Nothing, we're just friends,” you say nonchalantly

“Ah I see, and paying for everything and asking you out every single day is being ‘just friends’, sure”

“Sunoo, you’re being delusional. He’s just being a nice person”

“Whatever you say” he raises his eyebrows and shrugs his shoulders.

“I mean he’s cute, but I don’t think we’d become a thing; I met him not even a month ago,” you say as you add the last things to your notes.

It’s been hours since any of you spoke; focusing hard on your studies. The door opens as a gust of cold air is pushed your way. You look up to see who it is. Jake stood there, wearing his puffer; and his messy brunette hair sticking out in places due to the wind.

He walks over to your seat and greets you. He puts a hand on your back and sits down in the chair next to you. Sunoo and Heeseung watch the whole interaction.

“Hey,” he smiles. Taking you by surprise, he brought you dinner. “What’s this?” he places the brown bag down next to you on the desk, placing his arm around the back of your chair. You look up at Sunoo as he’s eyeing you, waiting for you to introduce them. Giving you a look that says, ‘Just friends?’. You shake your head and focus your attention on them.

“Jake this is Sunoo and Heeseung. The best friends I told you about.” you move your hand gesturing to them.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you guys. I’m Jake.” he holds his hand out for them to shake.

“I know who you are.” Sunoo smiles at him and puts his hand under his chin.

Jake slowly pulls his hand back and laughs under his breath

“I’ve heard quite a lot about you actually” he looks over at you and grins. You roll your eyes at your best friend.

“I’m Heeseung. It’s nice to meet you too” he says politely smiling at him; unlike Sunoo

Bringing your attention down to your phone next to you you realize the time. It’s starting to get late, and you want to be in your bed and snuggle into your blanket considering the cold weather. Gathering your stuff, you excuse yourself.

“Wow, look at the time. It’s getting late. You guys should get going too, don’t you have early classes Hee?” you ask

Heeseung nods his head at you and picks up his books. Then, he stuffs them in his backpack.

“And thank you for the dinner, Jake. It was sweet of you.” When you smile at him you notice a subtle blush growing on his cheeks. He rubs the back of his head and smiles back at you.

“It was no big deal. But why don’t I walk you home? I don’t want you out this late at night alone.”

Agreeing to his proposal you pick your things up and bid farewell to your friends.

Just as you’re about to turn around you see a shit-eating grin on Sunoo’s face, you turn to flip him off and make your way out of the door. Jake holds it open for you and a few other people behind you leaving the library. With the final person out, you make your way over to your dorm.

The walk is silent for a while. Jake takes in a deep breath, takes the wheel, and guides the flow of a conversation “Your friends seem nice. I like Heeseung. I mean we barely said a sentence to each other, but he seems nice.” he says. And then he brings up the blabbermouth.

“And Sunoo? Was it? He said he’s heard a lot about me?” he says with a smirk on his lips.

“Do you talk about me?” He brings it up again. You start to feel the embarrassment creep up from your chest to your face. You can feel your ears start to warm up as they go unnoticeably red. Your hands go up to cover them, Jake stares at you for a moment as you walk.

“Hmm?” you pretend to think

“I don’t think I talk about you THAT often” you laugh it off

“But you do happen to come up in a sum of conversations”

“Sure” he leaves it at that. Nearing the building of your dorm, Jake stops as you get closer to the entrance.

“Well this is my stop” You tilt your head to look at his features smiling at him

“And, thank you for walking me home; and for the dinner” You lift the bag.

“I told you it’s no big deal. I enjoyed my time walking with you. To be completely honest I enjoyed every time I’ve spent with you.” he pauses to think about what to say to you next.

“I’m less alone than I thought I’d be since I met you”

This makes you blush; hard. The feeling in your stomach is making feel things. Like butterflies erupted in your tummy. You felt a sense of pride after hearing him say that about you. Your heart, rapidly thumping in your chest.

“I’m glad I was the person you bumped into that day or else I would’ve been stuck with Sunoo and Heeseung” You roll your eyes playfully.

“Oh c’mon, they can’t be that bad”

“Please, try being with them 24/7 for four years. It’s like I’m babysitting two toddlers”

He laughs at that. He starts to feel the same way you do after he sees your smile. It's not your normal smile. It’s that big bright smile you show when you’re belly laughing. He finds it so adorable he could just kiss you. And he might just do that. Because you see him lean in after you’ve calmed down from your high of laughter. Looking up at him you finally realize what he’s doing.

And you do nothing to stop it, you’re already leaning into him too. When you close your eyes, you feel his soft lips against yours. The kiss is soft and gentle. He feels your smile against him, teeth clashing, and it causes him to do the same as well. Jake’s hand is placed in your hair and the other is placed on your neck. The butterflies have made their way to your chest.

This feeling ignites something new in you. A feeling you haven’t felt in a while. Finally, pulling apart, he leans his forehead against yours and stays there for a minute before he says something.

He chuckles under his breath and says “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that” You giggle into his chest and place a small peck on his lips. When opens his eyes he feels you pull back from him. “Thank you again for tonight. Text me when you get home, safely” you tell him as you walk backward to the door.

“Goodnight Jake”

He stands there still in shock about what had just occurred. Not believing he had just had his first kiss with you. After registering what you had said, he nods his head and turns around.

“Goodnight,” he says under his breath.

Today is full of exams, right after today is the start of your freedom. You called Sunoo and Heeseung over to help them study for one last and final time. When you hear Sunoo’s knock on the door you walk over to your door and open it for them.

“Did you guys fuck?” is the first thing he says to you. Unbelievable. You shake your head at him and push him into your room.

“Jeez Sunoo, let the girl breathe. You were just ambushing her with questions about him yesterday. When is it enough?!” he exclaimed.

Sunoo and you pause for a minute and look at each other. Then, you both burst into laughter at your friend’s outburst. Heeseung gives you both an annoyed look as they both walk into the living room. Sunoo waits patiently for you to spill your guts on what happened between you and the boy. As per his request, you explain and finally spew what had happened.

“We kissed”

“I knew something happened between you two!” He starts jumping around the room, his hands balled into a fist out of excitement

“Okay calm down, you’re acting like they’re getting married,” Heeseung says.

You go to sit next to Heeseung pull your laptop out of its bag and begin studying. Sunoo finally calmed down, he walked into the kitchen to get snacks for the time being

It’s been over an hour since the boys came over. Your phone suddenly rings and when you turn it over to see who was calling; Jake’s name appears on the screen.

“Hey, are you doing anything right now?”

You look back at your friends, they seem to be occupied with their work. You stand up from your seat and walk to the kitchen. Making sure Sunoo wouldn’t eavesdrop on your conversation

“No, I’m not doing anything, why?” you ask curiously

“Great, do you wanna hang out?”

A smile starts to spread across your face when you feel that same feeling you felt the other night erupt in your stomach.

“Yeah, just give me a few minutes and text me when you’re here”

By the time you're finished getting ready, Sunoo looks up at you with a confused look.

“And where are you going?”

“Out”

“Out where?” he raises one of his eyebrows

“With Jake?”

You stay quiet, and you start to feel a smile creep on your face.

When your phone dings with a notification, your heartbeat picks up. The text read ‘I’m here’.

“Bye, guys!”

“Wait-” Before you could let him continue his sentence you close the door and walk down the stairs to Jake.

When you walk out the door you can see Jake standing next to the bench near the door, on his phone, patiently waiting for you to emerge from your dorm. Your last exam started around late afternoon; you had the time to spend with Jake. Neither of you had discussed what happened between the two of you the night before.

When you open the door Jake can feel his heartbeat speed up at the thought of you. Turning, he’s face to face with you now before he can stop himself, he has his arms wrapped around your waist. He barely pulls away and your faces are so close your lips are touching. You lean in, peck his lips in a quick action, and smile.

“Hi,” you say quietly

You look so adorable. Your cheeks have gotten red due to the cold outside. He smiles at you pulls away and grabs your hand walking beside you.

“So where are we going?” you ask curiously looking up at him

Without answering he smiles and takes the lead.

“It’s a surprise,” he says with a smirk on his face

“What do you mean surprise?” you ask. An unsure smile appears on your lips

“Trust me, hmm?” Taking a deep breath and taking a leap of faith in trusting him. Walking over to his car he opens the door for you. Thanking him he closes the door and walks over to the driver's seat.

It’s been about an hour since Jake picked you up from your dorm, and you end up in the middle of a gorgeous cherry magnolia tree. The white petals slowly fall from the branch. There’s a bridge leading up to a forest of them you gasp out loud bringing your hands up to your mouth and letting go of his. Walking across the bridge you take in the sight of the white flowers growing on the branches. This has to be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever come across. Turning back to Jake, you ask him “How do you know about this place? It’s so pretty, I didn’t even know this was here”

He looks around at the trees and makes you wait for a response

“I don’t know, had a couple of friends help me pick out a place you’d like. Plus I did do a little bit of digging. And by digging I mean I asked Sunoo what your favorite flower was”

At the mention of his friends, you think back and rack your brain, trying to remember if Jake ever mentioned any of his friends. Now realizing you’ve never met any of them. Remembering Sunoo mentioning this place, he wanted to visit sometime over winter break. You smile at the thought of Jake going to your friend for advice.

Caught up in your thoughts you don’t notice when Jake walks up behind you. A shiver runs up your spine when you feel his warm hands run along your waist, softly digging his face into the crook of your neck. Taking in the scent of strawberries, and looking around at the trees; you can’t get enough of how pretty the trees are during this time.

They must be even prettier during the springtime, you think. Fallen magnolia flowers pile near a bench, you walk over and take a seat pulling Jake by his hand to follow you. He pulled out his phone opened the camera app and snuck a few snaps of you. You looked so beautiful to him that he couldn’t resist, he set a reminder in his head to add it to your contact. Watching you made him feel so many things; things he’s never felt before for someone.

When you look back at him you pause for a moment, the look on his face makes you blush. Unconsciously he slowly leans into you faces close so close you can feel his cold breath against his, foreheads touching, finally lips touching. The taste of your sweet lips on his makes him burst with warmth.

The feeling of his soft lip against yours makes your tummy do summersaults, and your body feels immune to the cold as the warmth radiating from his body makes you feel like you are sitting next to a fire. Slowly, pulling away his big brown eyes look into yours. Crinkled at the corners as you smile at him. Breathing in you begin to question what your situation is now

Do you put a label on it? Are you guys boyfriend and girlfriend? Does he think this is just you ‘fooling around’? All those questions disappear when you speak up

“So what does this mean for us?” you ask

“Will you be mine?”

Finally, after waiting for so long. Nodding your head in response a big smile forms on your precious lips and you throw your arms around him. Feeling nothing but joy and happiness at this moment you get to share with your boyfriend

With finals out of the way and winter break starting Jake was over at your place for hours on end. Intimacy has been out of the picture for quite some time now. You wanted to see where this would go first. He took you out on dates around the city and he would even drive you out of town to show you some places he had seen while mindlessly scrolling on Tiktok and wanted to take you there.

Sitting on the couch with your boyfriend you both agreed to stay in today and put on traditional Christmas movies. Your head lay on his chest while his hands settled on your lower back. His hoodie was covering his long brunette hair, and his glasses over his features. In the small silence of the room with the movie quietly playing in the back, Jake starts to move his hands lower. Your hands end up moving up to his neck as you look up at him and scoot closer, you're face to face with him. Faces inches apart you slowly move your way closer to him. Your lips land on his and you move into a slow kiss. His soft lips melt into yours.

Moving his tongue between your lips for access; you grant him what he needs. The room is filled with the smacking of your lips. Sitting up Jake pulls you over his hips and he places his hands on your ass and squeezes. You let out a small whine when his cold hands make their way under the thin sweater you wore and make contact with your warm skin.

As he moves his hands upwards, the sweater starts to ride up your stomach making its way over your head the sweater is left on the floor now. Letting out a small gasp as your perked nipples come in contact with the cold air. Jake leans down and places his lips over your chest, the sensation makes you wet. You grind your hips over his hard-on; his loud groan filling the room.

Moaning into your chest, he kisses his way up over your neck. He stays there for a while, sucking and licking. You can feel your panties getting wetter from his actions he flips you over throws his glasses off onto the table, and lifts his hoodie off over his head. The sight of his abs makes you rub your thighs together to relieve the ache between them. Jake hooks his fingers on the waistband of your pants and pulls them down. Not before he asks, “You sure you want this?”

“Please, Jake. I need you so bad”

This turns him into a madman. He tears your pants off along with your soiled panties. He makes fast movements, bringing his fingers down to your heat and glides them through your folds.

“All this for me baby? Did I do this to you? So fucking needy you have your panties drenched for me? Huh, darling?”

“Only for you” you moan as his thumb comes in contact with your clit. Whimpering lowly, Jake makes his way down kissing your stomach, he stops at your pelvis. He looks up at you with his lower lip hanging low, jawline so fine he can through the tension between the two of you. He takes in the sight of your fucked out expression and moves his head under the blanket you shared.

He kisses your thighs and hooks his arms around them his lips hovered over yours, gripping his hair, needy for him. Finally, he digs his face into your sopping cunt, his tongue finds your clit and slowly he draws slow circles, teasing you.

“Jake, please”

“Be patient, baby. I swear I’ll make you feel so good”

Trusting his word, you let him do his thing. His tongue glides through your pussy making you quiver. Pulling your hips closer to his face, making sure you don’t move. Eating you out like it’s his last meal he rapidly flicks his tongue over your clit, your thighs shaking beside him from the pleasure. The sloppy sound of your pussy is the only sound in the room, the sound of the TV blocked out by the pleasure. Moving your hand up to your soft tit, you roll your nipple between your fingers moaning his name, not giving a care if you are too loud or not.

“Ugh, Jake you make me feel so good”

Gripping his hair hard you start to feel the burning sensation in your lower stomach. Chasing after your orgasm you start to blank, forgetting your own name his digits find your entrance. Dwelling in the feeling of your wet cunt against his lips he slowly enters you. Whines spew from your throat as you arch your back, looking down at him. Taking in the sight of his tongue repeatedly lap your cunt. You bite your lip so hard you think you're bleeding. Letting out a loud gasp you pull him up by his hair and bring him back to you; kissing his lips, you can taste yourself on his tongue.

“I need your cock, so bad” you say softly

Pulling away from you he pulls his sweats down along with his boxers. Impatient, he pulls his throbbing cock out teasing it against your entrance. Swollen, dripping, red tip, needy for your cunt.

“Do you have a condom?”

“I’m on the pill, it’s okay.”

Leaning in and giving you a sweet peck against your lips he sinks in slowly. His pace is slow at first, letting you adjust to him. You can feel every inch of him sinking in, getting deeper with his slow motions. His hands are on either side of your head holding himself steady. Finally, he bottoms out. Slowly but surely picking up his pace, you can feel every vein rub against your aching walls. Slamming his hips into yours, your back arches into him, head tilted back as you moan his name out, forgetting everything in your mind as you solely focus your attention on the pleasure. As he's moving in and out, he kisses you roughly. Teeth clashing against each other; the rough sounds of his hips pushing into yours make you feel that same sensation you had felt minutes ago.

Jake lays his face in the crook of your neck and kisses your collarbone. “Who’s making you feel so good, huh? Say my name, baby c’mon” he whispers into your ear. The feeling of you wrapped around him makes him pick up his pace at an animalistic speed. Never wanting to stop, he brings his thumb down and rubs against your clit, and for the second time tonight, you reach your high. You go lightheaded, seeing stars once again, and you whine as you reach your climax.

Three final thrusts, he pulls out and finishes on your stomach. Looking down you swipe your finger against his come and bring it up to your mouth. Sucking on your finger he pulls it away and kisses you.

You wake up the next day and lay in your bed. You had a t-shirt thrown over you with a fresh set of panties. You turn to your side to find your boyfriend peacefully sleeping. Moving your arm over his shoulder he places a hand on your wrist and kisses it. Sleepy eyes looking at you; he rolls you over and places his face on your neck.

“Good morning,” he says with a sleepy voice

“Hi, baby,” you say back to him.

Looking at the clock it read 10:00 am. You both had nowhere to be so you decide to stay in bed for a little while longer.

“How’d you sleep last night? I hope my bed was comfortable enough” you say

“It was plenty” he smiles with his eyes closed

Humming you go to walk over to the bathroom but you feel a tug on your arm. You land on his chest and he wraps his arm around you.

“Stay in bed for just a little while longer, love”

Now, finally out of bed. You and Jake made breakfast together but he soon had to go. He made plans with a friend he made while at the library. “My friend’s planning on throwing a Christmas party to celebrate the end of exams and the beginning of winter break,” his mouth still full of pancake. “You wanna come with me? You can even bring Heeseung and Sunoo along, too” Only thinking about it, Heeseung isn’t big on partying. Maybe you should ask Sunoo if he wants to go, you’re sure he doesn't have any plans. Swallowing what's left of your breakfast you perk up in your chair and give him your final decision.

“Yeah, I’ll text Sunoo and ask if he wants to go” he picks up his and your plate and walks it over to the sink to wash them. “Okay, great! The party starts at 8, I’ll pick you up around 7:30” he explains as he puts away the now-washed plate next to the drying rack by the sink. Walking over to pick up his jacket hanging from the back of his chair he leans down and pecks you on your forehead. You rise from your seat and walk him out to the front door. When he’s done putting on his shoes you place a hand on his shoulder and rise on your tiptoes to place a small kiss on the corner of his mouth. But he moves in for a proper kiss. “I’ll see you later” Waving your hand goodbye, you watch him disappear around the corner.

With your dorm void of your boyfriend, you decide to call up Sunoo to come over. Heeseung was out of town visiting his family for the holidays so it was just him in the dorm. The phone rings three times before he picks up.

“Hello?”

“Sunoo, are you doing anything right now?” you play with your hair as you talk to him

“Nothing. Why?”

“You wanna hang out today at my place? I’m bored. It takes him a few seconds until he responds.

“Okay I’ll be over in a few”

Sitting in silence with a movie playing in the background you suddenly say “We fucked”

Sunoo is left speechless, which confuses you because ever since you have mentioned Jake all he can talk about is if you’ve gotten dicked down yet. His mouth is hung open as he tries to process what you just said. After a few minutes of silence from him, he finally yells into the air and jumps around the room like a bunny rabbit. “Oh my God! All of a sudden?! Tell me everything!” you begin to explain the whole story to him. From your date to the magnolia trees to him asking you to be his girlfriend. Talking about makes you feel all giddy all over again. Sunoo, being your best friend and all, was so unbelievably happy for you.

You would need to tell Heeseung when he got back, but knowing Sunoo he would probably tell him right when he returned to their dorm. Thinking back on everything that’s happened to you in the past months has you feeling blessed. Jake has made you feel things you haven’t felt in a long time. But, sometimes you’d like to think everything is going so well. But what do they always say? There’s always a calm before the storm, is it?

“Hey, honey” your mother called you over the phone

“Hi what’s up?” placing your phone on your vanity as you touched up your makeup

Today was the party that Jake had told you about a few days ago. From what you heard from Jake, the party wasn’t supposed to be big. Just close friends of his and maybe a few other guests. You asked Sunoo if he wanted to come but long story short he had already made plans the day of but he also didn’t feel like third wheeling. He would be at his parent’s house anyway for the holidays.

“Are you coming over for Christmas? We miss you over here” From the tone of her voice you can imagine a pout forming on her lips

“Yes, Mom I already told Dad that I’d drive down to the airport and take the first flight out” You had missed your parents dearly, when you told them you wanted to go to school down in Seoul they supported you 100%. The flight from Korea to your hometown was a long way away. You were a bit disappointed that Jake wouldn’t be joining you, but understandingly he had told you that he already made plans to fly out to see his parents in Australia.

Guessing you would just have to wait you’d till you were both back to exchange gifts.

“Okay, Niyah misses you too she won’t stop asking for her Cuddle” ‘Cuddle’ was a name your niece gave you because she wasn’t able to say your name. Cuddle just stuck and she’s been calling you that ever since. “Tell her I’ll be back soon and that I miss her too” Smiling at the thought of your baby niece.

“I need to go Mom. I’ll call you when I board the plane, I love you”

“Okay be safe, I love you too”

Your phone beeps indicating of the voice call ending. Music starts to vibrate through your room again after your abrupt phone call from your mother as you stand from your desk and walk over to your closet. Before you can look through your closet for something to wear for the party a knock is heard from the front door. Jake stands on the other side of the door with his hands behind his back waiting for you patiently to let him.

A small “Hi, baby” comes from your mouth as you softly lean yourself against him. He places a hand behind your head and leans down, pecking your lips. “Hi, my love”

Stepping to the side you walk back to your room as he follows you. He walks over to your bed and lays down. Placing his hands behind his head as if he were relaxing in paradise.

“Jake” you call out for his attention. Standing in front of your closet once again you pull out two dresses. A red satin dress and a simple black one

“Hm?” he says with raised eyebrows.

“Which one looks better? The black one or the red one? I can’t decide” you ask him. He looks back and forth between you and the dresses. Turning to the mirror you put both of the dresses up to your body. The ruffling of sheets can be heard behind you. You can see Jake push himself off the bed and walk towards you

Jake sneaks his hands on your waist and looks at you in the mirror. “You look good in anything, baby. But maybe the black one. I think it suits you better than the red one.” he tells you. You turn in his arms raising your arms to wrap around his neck. His sleeves are rolled up to his elbows and he squeezes around your waist. Tilting your head back you look at him his smiling face looks down at you, his eyes searching over your soft features.

He leans in to kiss your forehead, then down your nose, and then your lips. “Okay” Detaching your body from his, you walk to your closet to put the red dress away and put on the black one Jake had chosen.

Jake is waiting outside in your living room as you finish up the last of your makeup and making sure you look presentable; this is your first time meeting his friends. When you walk out of your room, he looks up to the sound of your door closing and watches you in awe. You look stunning, stopping his heart for a second with the way you look tonight. A radiating smile glows on his face as he can’t seem to take his eyes off you.

He walks closer to you and stands there admiring your form. Completely breathtaking. Inching closer to you he can’t hold himself back from touching you. Slowly wrapping your arms around his waist as his hands come up to cup your cheeks.

“What?” you laugh

He softly pulls you in for a soft kiss. It’s slow and comforting, never failing to make your heart stop at every little touch. He pulls away and breathes in your scent. “You look so beautiful, darling.” Maybe you shouldn’t have added blush while you were doing your makeup. Your face was completely flush by the warmth of your dorm and the warmth he brings you every time he compliments you.

“Let’s get going now” he holds your hand and leads you to the front door. But not before you pick up your bag and you coat.

When you pull up to the party, there are a lot more people than you were told. It was more like a house party. Walking through the door, loud music was bumping through the air, sweaty bodies were being pushed up against one another.

Jake’s holding onto your hand making sure he doesn’t lose you in the crowd of people. “Let’s go to the kitchen, you want something to drink?” he yells over the music. Barely making out what he had said you nod your head at him and let him take the lead.

You don’t see many familiar faces around. Maybe some of the students you see at your lectures but that’s it. When you walk into the kitchen, Jake makes out a few familiar faces and walks over to them. He greets the many friends that he made over the past few weeks. “Hey, man,” his friend said leaning in for a hug. His eyes make their way over to you and scans you up and down. He points at you and says “Who’s this” with a smile on his face.

“Ah, guys. This is my girlfriend” he tells them your name and introduces you. “This is Chan, Jay, and Felix” He points to the one who couldn’t take his eyes away from you, Jay, and you nod your head at them as a greeting.

“It’s nice to meet you all,” you say

Jay speaks up and looks at you as if he knows you. “We have the same afternoon class, right? You always sit in that same seat up in the front,” he says with a smirk. “Yeah, I think we do. But I don’t think I have ever seen you” He makes a face as if you’ve shot him the heart “Oof, well to be fair I do keep to myself a lot”

“I’m always sat in the back. We should sit together, it’s nice to know I’ll have someone in that class that I know” Jake watches the whole interaction. He clenches his jaw as he sees the way Jay keeps looking at you up and down. You haven’t noticed it as you continue to laugh at what he says.

“Yeah, we should. I don’t know a lot of people in that class so it’s nice to know that I know at least one person”

You feel Jake’s hand pull you closer to him by your waist. You look up at him to see his irritated expression. You place a hand on his cheek and turn his head to you. “What’s the matter, baby?” His jaw is locked as he has an iron grip on you “Let’s go to the living room”

He guides you to one of the couches with heavy music blaring in your ears. He takes his seat and places you on his lap. Wrapping your arm around his neck he digs his face into the crook of your neck. You can feel his lips skin over your skin, and you feel goosebumps all over. “Are you okay” you whisper into his ear for only him to hear.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Looking into your eyes they scan over your face and land on your soft lips. He turns his head to deepen the kiss and he slips his tongue through your lips. Breathing in your flowery scent his hands glide down to your ass, pushing lightly on his chest so he could let you go. You realize you’re in public with other people around. Looking at your surroundings your eyes randomly fall in line with Jay. His eyes were already on you, Jake follows your line of sight and catches Jay looking at the both of you. He pushes you off him softly and excuses himself. “I need a drink,” he says in an almost growl. Chasing after him you place a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“Wait, are you mad at me?” you say in a small voice. He only shakes his head and cups your cheeks. “No, I’m not mad at you baby. I’m just a little tired. You know I’ve been a bit stressed, having to pack and plan out all my stuff to visit my family tomorrow.” You know when he’s lying, but not wanting to fight any further, you listen to him. “Why don’t we go home then huh? We can go back to my place?”

Nodding his head at your suggestion he places his hand on your lower back to guide you to the exit. Before you can make it past the door, Jay stops you and wraps his arm around Jake’s shoulder. “Leaving already,” he says “The party just started” Jake shoves his arm off and rolls his shoulder. “Look, man, I’m not in the mood right now, so why don’t you just fuck off and leave us alone” Irritation can be heard in his tone, his brows furrowed, jaw clenched. This is the angriest he’s been around you.

Thinking back to his tone, you begin to realize how rude he was. When you walk out the door you walk a few steps behind your boyfriend as you try to keep up with him you run up to him and clasp your hand with his, but he immediately pulls back. What the fuck was with him? Did you do something to upset him? You couldn’t have, he told you nothing was wrong He looks down at you with an angry look on his face. “I’m not in the mood right now. Can we just go to your apartment?”

Nodding your head lowly you begin to walk in silence

When you walk through the door to your dorm Jake walks in behind you. It’s silent on his end, not a word coming from his mouth. He places his coat on your desk chair and sits on your bed on his phone. The vibe is off in the room that you can feel the tension seep in between the two of you. You don’t like it; you despise sitting in silence not knowing how to bring up what happened at the party. Taking a seat in front of him where your desk chair is you look at him until he looks up from his phone and at you.

Your arms are folded over each other on the back of the chair as you lay your chin over them. “Baby,” you say in a small pout. He hums in response his attention focused on his phone. This action only infuriates you. You tug on his arm and he looks up at you with an irritated expression his eyebrows furrowed.

“Hey, what’s the matter with you why are you so mad?”

“I’m not mad, what are you talking about”

You stand and you can feel your blood start to boil. The atmosphere of the room makes you feel unsettled.

“What am I talking about? What the fuck are you talking about Jake? I’m not the one that has a problem here”

“Neither do I!” he shouts back at you. Now he’s starting to irritate you.

“You do, what the hell is bothering you so much that you’re yelling at me?!” The room starts to feel hot, and the feeling in your stomach makes you want to hurl. You don’t like fighting with Jake. You hate this feeling rising in your chest. You have never fought with Jake before. It would only be about small things like who left the sink on or who didn’t close the refrigerator door.

“At the party,” finally you get an answer out of him. “Are you s out of this world to see that Jay was eyeing you all night and he was clearly flirting with you” What? What is he talking about? Yes, you saw him glance over to you for a second but you completely ignored him. It’s the first time fighting with him and it’s over something completely stupid. Was he jealous?

“No, I did not see him looking at me because I was solely focused on you the whole night. I’ve had my attention on you because why would I even bat an eye at him when I’m with you?! That doesn’t make any sense to me Jake” It takes you a while to figure out what was going on. Jake couldn’t let go of the fact that Jay was looking at you the whole night.

“Are you seriously jealous right now? I was trying to get along with your friends. Nothing even went on but a small conversation between two people and you’re seriously jealous,” The tone in your voice is raised and you can feel your blood boil up your skin. Jake turns and picks his jacket off your chair walking away from the conversation. You can practically see steam coming out from his ears.

“Look, I can’t do this right now. I need to get my stuff together before tomorrow.” he says

“Oh! So you’re walking out is what you’re doing. You’re not even willing to talk this out?”

“Yes, I am. I cannot argue with you, my head is pounding and I just can’t deal with this. I need to leave” he says sternly

“Merry Christmas” he walks out the door leaving nothing behind. You can hear your heart shatter in your ears. The door slamming behind you, Jake walks out the door along with your heart.

“Merry Christmas to you too,” you say softly under your breath

When you see your family again you feel everything disappear from the night before for a moment. You haven’t spoke to Jake since he walked out on you last night. Not a single phone call or text from him. The feeling of no contact from him sets an uneasy feeling in your stomach.

The day after Christmas your sister, Mia, walks into your old room and takes a seat at the foot of your bed.

“What’s wrong?” you look up at her. Her face has a look of sorrow. You hadn’t been that obvious, had you? That fight shouldn’t have affected you as much as it did. You’ve only been going out for a little less than a month. So why do you feel so distraught?

“Nothing, why?” you respond to her.

“Well, you’ve been a little quiet since you came home a few days ago and you’ve been kind of down. Did something happen?”

It takes you a moment to collect your thoughts. Thinking back to the argument you and Jake had, you about the things that he said and you realize how stupid this whole argument is. Another thing you realize is that your family does not know that you have a boyfriend.

“Um, I haven’t told anyone yet because I know if I did Mom would freak the fuck out and make a whole scene about it and I’m trying to get away from drama at the moment.”

Mia furrows her brows in confusion and thinks about the things you’ve talked about since you got back.

“What did you not tell us?”

You’re laid on your side on your bed facing away from your sister you reply softly in a small voice “I have a boyfriend”. You say it in an almost whisper she almost doesn’t catch it the first time. “You have a what!”

Sitting up from your bed frantically you put a hand over her mouth and shush her. “Be quiet! I told you mom doesn’t know yet and I don’t wanna tell her until later”

A smile creeps up on her lips and she starts to scream. She quickly lowers her tone when she realizes just how loud she’s being. “Oh my God, what’s his name? How did you guys meet? How long have you been together? OH! Did you guys do it yet?”

Her constant questions get you to burst out laughing. You miss when you were able to tell her everything that goes on in your life. But that changed when you went off to college and she started working and started a family.

“Oh god, Mia, calm down please. I’ll tell you everything later. But right now I’m kinda in a rough situation.” You continue to explain the whole argument to your sister and she sits and listens to you.

“Is he a fucking idiot? Does he not trust you enough to know that you only have eyes for him? Look, if he doesn’t come up to you and try to resolve the issue between you two is he worth pining for? Is he worth your tears and your energy?” Before you can respond to her she cuts you off before you can get your first word out

“No, I didn’t think so. Think about it babe you’ve only been dating this guy for how long and he’s already messed up because of something stupid,”

“I know, but what I feel for him is real. It’s so real to me that it scares me how much I care about him” You can feel tears well up behind your eyes. Thinking this deeply about your feelings toward Jake makes you realize how much of a constant he has become in your life. You don’t remember living life before you met him. And that scares you.

“I want this to work out for us. I’ve never felt this way for someone before. He makes me feel so happy,” This comes out in a small voice. You have never been this genuinely happy with someone before

A beat of silence passes as Mia tries to accumulate her words. She sighs and places a hand on your shoulder. “Babe, I just want what’s best for you, you know that. If you think waiting for him is the right thing to do, then wait. If he ever hurts you and makes you unhappy I swear to God call me and I’m bringing my ass down there to kick his” Laughing with tears in your eyes you pull her in for a tight hug.

“I will, I love you”

“I love you too, sis”

The drive back from the airport to your dorm was awful. Cars piling on the road from coming home from holiday ended in unbearable traffic. You had caught a cold from your niece and the weather didn’t help with your symptoms either. Sunoo offered to pick you up, but you declined his offer because Jake had said that he would be picking you up from the airport. Now you are starting to regret your decisions. You hadn’t heard from him in a while. Before the argument he had told you he was coming back the day before you. So, you had some hopes of meeting him when you first arrived home. But to your dismay, you were met with an empty drop-off area and baggage claim. You had to lug around your suitcases until you finally found an Uber driver.

When you reach your dorm, you’re met with a bouquet of magnolias lying next to your door. Dropping your bags on the floor you pick up the flowers in search of a note. It looks like it’s been here for a while. Some of the pedals are a bit wilted but still pretty, nonetheless. A small white piece of paper is found in the middle of the beautiful flowers. Putting your hand in to fetch it out you unravel it and read what was displayed.

My baby, I’m sorry for what happened before we parted. I was being immature, and I wasn’t thinking straight. I’m sorry for ruining your Christmas and not checking up on you. Just know that I was thinking about you during the time we couldn’t spend together I just felt so guilty for the way I acted I felt I didn’t deserve to talk to you yet. I’m ready to talk whenever you want to

Please call or text me when you get these. I’m sorry.

- Jake

The words written on the piece of paper pull on your heartstrings. You truly did miss him. He went through the trouble of buying you flowers and writing a note? Opening the front door to your dorm you pull your things in along with the flowers inside. Your heart nearly jumps from your chest when you hear rustling come from your desk. The body perks up and turns to face you. Jake had been sitting there since the day he came back from his hometown, waiting for you to come back home to him. He stands there taking in your presence. He had missed you, so much. Slowly walking over to you, not sure whether he’s allowed to touch you.

The tension between you seems to have dissipated from the time you’ve been apart. It’s quiet. Waiting for him to speak up. Waiting for him to apologize for what he’s done. Waiting for him. Dreading the days to see him again and reconcile your damaged feelings. Finally, after what felt like hours but in reality were only a few seconds. Jake finally pulls you in bear hugging you tightly as if he hasn’t seen you in years. He buries his face into the crook of your neck and inhales your scent. Oh, how he’s missed you. His arms tighten around your waist when you slowly bring your hands up to his shoulders.

“I missed you, love” he whispers into your cold skin. You sniffle due to your cold but also due to the tears you feel once again. The touch of his breath against your skin makes chills run up and down your body. You had been pining for him for days now. Finally, in the arms of your lover, you begin to feel a bit at ease. But you still felt uneasy not talking about the issue that has occurred between the two of you.

“I’ve missed you too,” you say in barely a whisper. He pulls away and he stays close to you. His hands are on your elbows, and he looks down at you. His brows slightly fall when he hears your nazely voice. He places his warm hand over your burning skin. “Did you catch a cold?” he says in a worried voice. Moving your hands, wrapping them around his wrist you calm down his worries. “Yes, but I’m fine. Nothing but hot soup will cure me” you say with a small smile on your face.

After, getting changed into more comfortable and clean clothes Jake wraps you in your blanket on your bed and sits by your side as he nurses you back to health.

“Did you see my note?” His head down in shame as he waits for your answer. You only nod your head in response. He’s playing with the sleeve of your sweater and looks back up at you again. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry I acted the way I did. I was being stupid, and I had alcohol in my system and I was thinking straight.’ It’s silent before you say anything. Thinking about what to say to his apology you look up at him and try to read his expression.

You could see the sorrow in his eyes; those cute puppy dog eyes that you’re so used to seeing everyday. He had a look of defeat on his features. You’ve never seen this side of him, this vulnerable side of him. Speaking up you say, “Jake that doesn’t give you the right to assume things about me. Do you not trust me?” he interrupts you in the middle of your speech. “I do trust you, my love. I just don’t trust him.”

“Baby, the only person you should be trusting is me, okay? I’m your girlfriend. I’m the one you should be trusting, not him. For us to work there needs to be trust between the both of us. If you can’t do that then there is no us.”

This makes his heartbeat pick up. Of course, he trusts you. But the way that Jay had kept his eyes on you the whole night just made him so angry that he started to blame you for reasons that he didn’t quite understand. He wants so badly for this to work out between you two. You’re impossibly the best thing that’s happened to him since he moved here.

Frantically, his grip on your sleeve becomes a bit tighter. Like he’s scared if he doesn’t hold on tight enough you’ll dissipate into thin air “I do trust you, baby, believe me I do. Okay. Can we please just forget this whole thing? Will you accept my apology? I miss you.” he moves his hands up from your wrist gently grazing your neck until they land on your cheeks. The look in his eye is now desperate. He needs you in his life, just like you he can’t recall living his life before he met you. He can’t screw up now. Finally, nodding your head he smiles that big smile that he always sports and pulls you in for a kiss.

Finally, things are back to the way they were for now.

Classes have started up again but thankfully your professors have taken it easy on you. The downside of this new schedule is that you haven’t gotten to spend as much time with Jake as you had before. With his schedule being completely different from yours you always manage to find time for him. He told you he was going to start being a better boyfriend for you ever since that fight. Often you would come home to takeout on your front door handle with a little note that he would write for you.

It was nice coming home to little things from him. The only times you got to spend time together was when he would come over when the both of you had a clear schedule. That time spent with him was your favorite.

Sitting at your desk, you hear keys jingle at your door. You gave Jake a spare key to your room whenever he felt like coming over, to save you the trouble of having to get up from your desk and answering the door yourself. At this point, he was living with you. He spent most of his time at your dorm while you were at classes and barely any time was spent at his. He had made your home his home. You would sometimes come home to him snuggled in your blanket asleep. Of course, Layla was cuddle next to him

You can hear his footsteps from behind you as you work on your laptop. Feeling his hands wrap around your shoulders and his face leaning into the side of yours, you can feel your heart rate pick up. Everything has gone so well between the two of you. It almost seems unreal.

He pecks you on your cheek and snuggles himself into your side.

“What are you doing, love”, turning your head to face him, you smile deeply at him and peck his lips. Moving your attention back to your laptop you reply back to him “Working on this midterm paper. Classes have been so hectic I barely have time to take a break.” Upon hearing this Jake reaches his hand over to the screen of your laptop and shuts it closed, you turn to him with a look of confusion.

“What are you doing?”

“Giving you a break” A small grin placed on his face, and he brings his face closer to yours. He places his soft lips against yours and moves in slowly. His hand is under your jaw caressing softly. He pulls away and looks into your wide eyes. “I’m gonna draw you a bath relax a bit baby you’ve been working hard for the past few weeks I haven’t seen you step away from your work once. How does that sound?” he tells you softly. “ You’re right, hmm. That sounds amazing thank you, baby”

He turns and makes his way to your bathroom. You hear the faucet of the bathtub begin to run. Jake’s phone was left next to where you were sitting and it’s only then that you hear it buzzing with a notification and your heart sinks for a moment. The name read ‘Amelia’ honestly, the only friends you have on campus are your best friends and Jake. You have never heard of this name before. Even in your lecture halls you have never once heard of this person. The name doesn’t ring a bell. But in order to also make a relationship work you need privacy, so that’s what you do. You ignore the constant buzzing of his phone and walk over to the bathroom where Jake is waiting for you

The sound of the water sloshing and the steaming bathroom make you feel warm inside. Jake’s sitting at the edge of the tub waiting for you to finish up in the other room. Your hand falls to the hem of your shirt and you slowly glide the fabric up your torso. Next, your sweats fall along with your panties. Jake sits as he watches you undress yourself. He can feel himself grow hard and his pants become unbearably tight. He suddenly stands up and takes long strides walking over to you. His hands land on your naked waist and you look up at him and bring your hands to the clasp of your bra. Finally undoing it Jake’s eyes fall to your soft breast. Nipples perking as your chest is hit with the slightly cold air in the room. You can see the drool fall from his lips.

“Why don’t you join me?” you raise a brow at him; teasing him. Immediately he tears his shirt and pants off as he guides you to the tub. Lifting his leg to get in first, he takes your hand softly and guides you on top of his lap. You can feel his hard cock against your thigh. His arms wrap around your middle, and you can feel his lift place soft kisses on your shoulder. His right arm manages to take hold of your tit and the other slowly glides down to where you need him the most.

His hand grazes your thigh and you shiver at the touch. The kiss on your neck makes you sigh out in lust. You have never needed him so badly; completely forgetting everything that’s happened in the last twenty minutes. Finally, his finger makes contact with your clit rubbing figure eights. Whimpering his name in a low breath makes him even more wired.

“Yeah, baby? You like that? Huh?” He says into your ear. Licking up to your jawline his plants kisses just beneath your ear and back down to your neck. The wet muscle circles as he sucks and bites with his teeth. Placing a love bite on your skin leaving a mark. His finger enters you slowly; you let out a low moan out of pleasure. His speed begins to pick up as he adds in another. Pleasure building in the pit of your stomach. His right arm moves across your chest, so your tits are pushed up against it.

“Oh my god, Jake. You make me feel so fucking good” You moan into his ear. With that, he turns you so you’re facing him now. “Fuck I can’t. I need to be inside of you” His hand wraps around his cock. The tip is red and throbbing you can see his veins. Stroking it once, twice, he teases at your entrance. The sloshing of the water is the only sound heard in the bathroom from your squirming. Sliding his cock between your folds; you look down at where you connect and moan his name. “Please, I need you in me. Need you to cum in me, Jake, please” you beg for him.

At this, manhandling you so your turned to him. Chest against his and he finally enters you. The stretch of his cock has you whining from how good he feels. The feeling of him inside of you has you starstruck. You’ll never get used to the way it makes you feel. His hand finds the bottom of your ass and he moves you up slowly. Your hands wrap around his shoulders as you dig your face into his neck. “Move. Please” you plead into his burning skin

“If you say so,” he says in a teasing voice. He bounces you on his cock and he meets you halfway. You bite onto his shoulder to muffle your sounds. You get enough noise complaints from the students in the building, you don’t need another one. The pace is fast, and animalistic, you can feel him prod deeply into you. He can feel himself in your stomach. He brings your hand to where he can feel himself inside of you.

“You feel that baby? So fucking deep in you I can feel myself” Moaning louder you can feel the burn build up in your tummy. Your thighs begin to burn and your hold on his shoulders become tighter. You feel yourself cum all over his cock. And with three last thrusts, he paints your walls in white as he finishes inside of you.

Sitting in silence, catching your breaths and coming down from your highs his hold on your waist tightens as he lifts you from the tub and grabs a towel to clean you off. His cock softens inside of you; you moan at the loss of being connected to him. Jake walks you to the bed and lays you down. He places a small kiss on your neck and tells you, “I’ll be right back” You smile at him and watch him walk away. But you see him grab his phone and look at it.

The unfamiliar name drags you back to that feeling from earlier.

Heeseung was back from his trip, and he invited you over to catch up on recent events of each others lives. Being apart from your best friends made you realize how much you’ve missed them. You sat on the couch as he was getting something ready in the kitchen. “Hey, how was the trip?” you ask him. He walks back with a tray in his hand and places it in front of you. It was an assortment of snacks he had brought back from his hometown.

“It was good, Lina’s doing good. I haven’t seen her in so long I missed her so much.” Lina, Heeseung’s girlfriend of almost a year, they met through you. She had asked about your friend and wanted to know if he was single. You put them on a date and, bam, they’re in a long serious relationship! Simple as that. It’s good to hear that she’s doing good. You hadn’t seen her in so long.

“Ahh, I miss her too. I haven’t talked to her since the last time I saw her. That was probably before summer break this year.”

Heeseung changes the subject to you now. “So, what’s up with you? How’s your family? I know you haven’t seen them in a while either.”

“They’re great. I got to see baby Aria again. She’s grown so much and she's walking now” You smile thinking about your niece.

Your phone suddenly buzzes with a notification from Sunoo.

Sunoo: Hey, wya rn?

Me: At ur place why? Did something happen?

Sunoo: Meet me at the café in 5 min

The serious texts makes your heart beat pick up. What happened? Did something happen to him? You look up to Heeseung and his focus is on the TV now. “Hee, I gotta go. Sunoo said he needs me for something” you tell him.

“Oh okay, what happened” He watches as you rise from your seat and collect you things to leave.

“I don’t know he won’t tell me. I’ll talk to you later” bending down to peck his cheek you place your bag over your shoulder and leave through the door. Hoping nothing bad has happened to your friend

After almost crashing a dozen times you make your way to the entrance of the café. Sunoo is sitting at one of the tables in the back waiting for you. He has a drink next to him and your usual next to the seat that’s supposed to be yours.

“Hey,” you greet him. He looks up at you with a look you can’t explain.

“So are you gonna explain to me what’s going on or what, your text earlier scared the shit out of me and I’m still a little on edge so can you please hurry and explain what the hell is going on” you say with a faux small on your face

“Hey, I’m sorry if I freaked you out but I need to tell you something.” He pulls his phone out from his back pocket and shows you a picture. You can feel your heart stop to your stomach. The color completely drains from your face as your shaky hands reach out to take ahold of his phone.

Displayed on the screen is a picture of Jake, with his hand on a girl’s waist, and they seem close to each other. You scroll, and there’s yet another picture of them. He’s smiling at her, and his face is close to hers nearly lips touching. The tears that swell in your eyes threaten to spill out. You can barely make out words to say. Completely in shock of what you see. It’s your boyfriend and a girl that isn’t you in his arms. You want to scream at the world for being so blind to this. You want so badly to hit something. You need to get out of here

There’s no way. He said that he was going to be better, and he said that he wanted to make this work. How could he betray you like this?

You stand from your seat abruptly making the chair squeak against the floor. Eyes fall on you as you quickly grab your things.

“Sunoo, I need to go,” you say in a small voice. He nods in understanding, and you rush towards your car. You look down at your phone and see his name pop up on your screen. ‘Hey baby wya? I miss you.’ the text reads. This only makes you angrier. You need to calm down before you crash and get into an accident.

The next thing you know your at his apartment complex. You walk up the stairs and storm into his living space. Jake jolts in surprise and looks at you. Fiery in your eyes you make your way to him and push at his shoulders, hard. “How could you? You said you were going to be better. You said that you wanted this to work” You pushed him again. “Why would you do this to me?” your lungs begin to burn from the constant yelling. Pushing him after each word your tears falling from your eyes. The pounding of your heart is heard in your ears. You’re screaming at the top of his lungs waiting for him to explain.

“Baby, what are you talking about?” He takes hold of your wrist trying to calm you down. Again, pushing him away you retaliate and keep your distance from him. His act only pushes you to the edge “I saw the pictures, Jake. I’m not fucking stupid” He can feel his heart drop when he finally realizes what you’re talking about. “I can explain”

“No, what is there to explain? I could see how close you were to her and the way you held her. You’re supposed to hold me like that. Not anyone else!” you yell at him. Hurt and anger are laced in your voice. “I need to get out of here,” you say in a quiet tone. Digging your hands in your hair, frustrated with yourself, with Jake. He tries to reach out to you, but you only push him away.

“Don’t touch me,” Pushing him back harder he stumbles back. You make your way to the door and walk back to your car. It’s silent. Unleashing the pent-up emotions inside of you; you sob into your hands. Your head begins to ache because of how much you cry. Your head hits against the wheel as you begin to shake from anger. You’ve never hurt this much. All your love was wasted into something, someone that wasn’t willing to give you that same love back.

The feeling of your phone buzzing in your pocket grabs your attention. Lifting your head you pat your pockets searching for the device you turn the screen over to read the name of the incoming voice call. “__?”

“Sunoo” you sob his name out

“Can I come over?”

It’s been a few weeks since you last spoke to Jake. Your phone has been blowing up with texts and calls from him. Telling you how sorry he is; that he needs to talk to you and that he messed up. You can’t bear the thought of talking to him face to face. Thinking about him hearts you as much as he already has. Sunoo and Heeseung drop in every other day, taking turns to make sure you were okay and you were eating properly. It hasn’t gotten easier, but you still managed to get out of bed and get to class.

As usual, you almost end up falling asleep in class from the sleepless nights. It’s not until you feel a tap on your shoulder that you perk up. Turning around you met face-to-face with a familiar face. Jay? Was that his name? You can’t be bothr to remember the face of the one person that started the argument between you and your ex-boyfriend. His chin is lying on his arms resting on the back of your chair. “Hey,” he says in a whisper, trying to keep his voice low. Rolling your eyes you look away and try to focus your attention back on the lesson. Without realizing the time class was over.

Heavy footsteps could be heard from behind you. Jay appears on your side and he places a hand on your shoulder. “What’s wrong? Did something happen between you and your boyfriend” Looking at his face makes you feel disgusted. Only reminding you of one of the worse times in your relationship.

“Hey, hey, hey” placing his hands in front of you to stop you in your tracks. From the corner of his eye, he can see Jake, throwing daggers at him. Jay looks down at you and pulls you in. His lips barely touch you before you shove him away. “What the fuck, Jay?!” Before Jay could look back to see Jake, he had already fled. “What? It’s not bad to switch it up sometimes. Plus I heard that you’re not with Jake anymore. You know, moving on is a natural thing to do after you break up with someone” he says with a smug look on his face. “Fuck off asshole”

Shoving his shoulder as you walk past him. Tears start to stream down your eyes as you pick up your steps through the halls to make it to the library. You had a shift today after school. When you walk through the door you half expect Jake to be there. Seeing his usual seat empty your hopes are crushed. You forget why you’re even in the situation that you are in with him for a moment. Everything begins to come rushing back. The girl texting him things a girl shouldn’t be texting a guy in a relationship. You can’t even begin to see him the same way you used to see him.

Pushing everything to the back of your head you sit down and wait for people to come up to the desk and help them out. Hours after your shift started Jake walks through the doors, with a neutral look on his face. Not with that usual happy look on his face radiating joy. You haven’t communicated in any way for weeks. He walks over to his usual spot. He only looks at you for a split second before he looks over to the manager, fixing the used books on a cart.

“Hey, um, Jungha, can I talk to you for a second?” With a shake of his head, he motions his head to follow him to the door behind the desk. Following him with your eyes, you begin to wonder when your shift ends. Being stuck here with him for the next two hours is going to be hell. You called in sick for about two weeks. Jungha was nice enough about it and let you off and give yourself some time to heal. About 15 minutes later, Jake walks out of the room but he doesn’t stop at his usual chair next to you, no, he walks to the door and leaves. What? Did he take the day off or something? You shouldn’t care about what he’s doing with his life, but you do. How can you not? You were in love with him. You still are. Holding back your tears you turn your attention back to your work. Your phone vibrates next to you, Sunoo texts you asking if you want to come over. You look over at the clock and realize just how much time has passed. Your shift was ending in a few minutes. Texting Sunoo back, you collect your things and shut down a bit earlier today. You walk out the door and call Sunoo to tell him you’re on your way.

Jake hadn’t come into work for the last couple of days. You had secretly been waiting for him to walk through the door but his cute puppy dog-like eyes haven’t made their appearance yet. Lazing around at your desk with your head held in your head and making little doodles on the piece of paper in front of you. Jungha catches sight of your dull expression and he places a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“I need to tell you something.” This gets you to perk up. Did something happen to him? “Uh, I know that you guys were together and he told me not to say anything to you but you were going to eventually figure out eventually why he isn’t here anymore.” he pauses.

“The reason why he wanted to talk the other day was because,” he takes the seat next to you and looks down at his hands. “He said that he wanted to quit. He couldn’t sit here for hours knowing that you guys wouldn’t talk. And just to let you know these are his words not mine. He also said he couldn’t stand the fact that he wouldn’t enjoy being here knowing that you were angry with him.” All this new information brings new emotions. Did he quit because of you? If anything it should have been you who should have quit.

“Oh” is all you say. What else are you supposed to say? You don’t want to seem pathetic for crying over your ex-boyfriend in front of your manager, that would be too embarrassing for your own good. You shake your head and get back to drawing your little doodles. Trying to distract yourself the best you could. You couldn't handle the thought of not seeing Jake anymore at work. Not seeing him at all.

At the end of your shift, you make your way to Sunoo and Heeseung’s place. You can’t bear the thought of being alone for the night; you need the comfort of your best friends. You open the door with one of the spare keys they had given you when they first bought the place. To Heeseung’s surprise, you make your way over to him on the couch and plop yourself down face-first on the other couch. “Hey,” he says with his furrowed brows. Placing a gentle hand to the back of your head.

“You okay?” Sitting up properly you shake your head. After hearing all the noise from the living room Sunoo emerges from his room and finds you sitting on his couch. “I don’t remember inviting you over” He says in a joking manner. You look over to the voice of your best friend. “Stop acting like you don’t love having me over” He rolls his eyes and walks to the kitchen to grab a snack.

“How do you feel today? You look even more down than you do most days. Did something happen?” He speaks from behind the fridge. You wait for him to turn the corner so you don’t have to yell. You don’t want them to get a noise complaint because of the shouting. “Jake quit at the library because of me,” you say blankly. Some silence passes and Sunoo shoots from his seat on the couch. “Is he out of his goddamn mind? Why did he quit? It should have been you who should have quit not the other way around. What the hell? He wants to die because I swear to God the last thing he’ll see is my fist in his face”

Looking at him with your jaw slack after the long rant you just witnessed. “What the hell are you looking at? I’m being so real right now. What makes him think he needs the time away from you after what he did to you,” The room goes silent. The only sound reverberating through the room is the TV playing the back. Heeseung sits watching the scene, completely in awe of the way that Sunoo is acting. And then out of the silence, Heeseung bursts out laughing. Then you’re in tears of laughter. Sunoo looks at the two of you like you’re the ones that are crazy. “Look I’m just stating facts if he wants to be a little pussy then he can be one but I won’t have my best friend looking dumb because of some guy that she met not that long ago.” This catches you off guard. Sure Sunoo never genuinely liked Jake.

But he tried his best for you. Because he wanted what was best for you. But this was drawing the line. “What are you talking about Sunoo? Do you have any idea how happy I was when I was with him?” you begin to argue. The laughter has far died down. “Yes, I understand that but look at the condition he left you in,” he exclaims. “For fucks sake you had to take two weeks off of work because of that asshole. You weren’t eating properly, fuck you weren’t even taking proper care of youself” You’re left speechless. You want to believe that there is still something there. Even after everything that’s happened, you still have hope. “Maybe I should just talk to him about it because he never even gave me an explanation because I walked away” Raising from your seat you walk towards the door.

“I just want what’s best for you” Sunoo speaks from behind you. “I need you to completely understand what you’re getting yourself into. I don’t want you to walk into a toxic factory and get yourself stuck in something you can’t get yourself out of” This tugs at your heart. You know that Sunoo talks from his heart, he’s only looking out for you.

“I love you so much Sunoo, but I know if I don’t do this and get the closure I need I’ll eventually lose my mind” The only thing he can do now is shake his head. “Okay, if anything happens call me” His steps are slow and he takes you in his arms for a tight hug. You shake your head and agree to call him. You wave at Heeseung and make your way out of their dorm.

Your next destination is your ex-boyfriend.

Jake was lying on his bed scrolling through new job listings. He needs to somehow find a way to provide for himself. A soft knock is heard from the front door. It was nearing almost midnight, he furrows his brows and pushes himself off his bed. Who could be knocking at his door at this hour? There, you stand with a confident look on your face, hair wet from the pouring rain. “__?” You can see his tired eyes his phone clutched in his hand. “What the hell are you doing here” the anger in his voice brews confusion in your head.

“I need talk to you” you say in a stern voice

“There’s nothing to talk about. I need you to leave” He slowly begins to close the door in your face but you refuse. Moving your hand forward you place in front of the door. Your legs have a mind of it’s own as you push past him into his apartment.

“What are you doing? There’s nothing to talk about”

“There’s everything to talk about Jake,” you exclaim. How can he say this? Your phone has non-stop buzzing with notifications from him for the past few weeks and now that you are here there’s absolutely nothing you can talk about? Now you’re confused.

“I came here to talk to you about that fucking girl in your phone. Who the fuck is that, Jake?” He runs his hands through his messy hair and begins pacing around the small living room. You can start to feel that sharp feeling in your chest. You start to stress over the fact that he hasn’t begun to explain himself at all.

“Fucking answer me Jake, who is that” Tears begin to form in your eyes again.

“You’ve been begging me to call and text you back. Now that I’m here, standing in front of you, ready to talk, you’re silent now. Now answer me who is that girl?” The built up tears are now streaming down your face. You begin to feel frustrated with him. With yourself for not being able to communicate how you felt all those weeks ago

This gets him to start talking. His eyes widen at the thought of never being in contact with you. He cannot begin to think about life without you.

“Okay! Okay, she’s this girl that I met over break while I was away in Australia. We were broken up–”

“We were not broken up Jake, we were in the middle of an argument and we were heated. We never broke up or even said the words ‘break up’. Just because we were in an argument means that we’ve broken up? That’s not how relationships work. Not with me”

He stands there, only staring at you, trying to process the words that slipped from your lips. Angry tears slide down your cheeks.

“Okay,” he says in a low voice. This somehow fuels the anger you already feel. The single word only infuriating you further

“That’s all you have to say? ‘Okay’?” Your voice begins to raise. “You are so pathetic” you say in a low voice. Turning in your spot you make your way over to the door to leave. Before you could reach the handle his hand grips your wrist and pulls you towards him. His soft hand lays on your cheek, his lips land on yours. Then, you feel something wet on your cheek. He’s… crying? Your lips move softly against his. All of these strong emotions make you sob against him.

He pulls away and rubs his thumb over your cheekbone. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m tired of fighting with you. I swear I didn’t do anything with her. We just talked and that’s it. I would never hurt you in any way.”

You fail to believe a word he says. “You wouldn’t have hurt me if you’d have understood our situation during that argument. You wouldn’t have hurt me if you just kept to yourself and hadn’t talked to her,” you say against his lips softly. You pause before you begin again.

“You wouldn’t have hurt me if you would have just trusted me, Jake.”

He leans in a kisses you again. He makes his way down to your neck and sobs. “I’m sorry, honey. Please, please, please forgive me. I’ll never hurt you I promise. I can’t live without you. I need you” His words are intoxicating. Something about him always seems to pull you in. And you can never escape him. His hands find their way under your shirt and land on your waist. He pushes you against the wall and he lifts your shirt from your body.

Then your bra is off. The cold air that hits your perked nipples makes you whine. You wrap your hands around his neck. Your fingers find home in his messy hair and you tug as he sucks on your bottom lip. He lifts you off the ground and carries you to his bedroom. Slowly, he lays you down on his soft bed. From the hem of his shirt, he lifts it over his head. His abs are out on display. He finally leans down and takes your nipple into his mouth. Gasping from the pleasure. His hands fall to the waistband of your jeans.

He pulls them down along with your panties. His fingers find purchase on your clit. Moving in small circles. You moan into his mouth and this turns him on even more. “Let me make you feel good. You deserve the most out of everyone. Let me show how sorry I am, baby”

Kissing down your stomach he places small kisses over your pelvis. His lips hover over your clit. His breath hits your cunt. Whimpers fill the quiet room. The first touch of his tongue sliding through your folds. “Agh, Jake” He wraps his arms around your thigh pulling you closer to him. Your right hand digs into his hair, tugging.

The vibrations of his moan send shivers throughout your body. Your other hand tugs at your nipples. Pushing yourself up from the bed and looking down at him. The sloppy sounds reverberate in the small room. You can feel your juices slipping down from your pussy. His thumb presses harsh circles over your clit. “Yes, yes, yes!!”

His sweats begin to feel uncomfortably tight. Moving against the bed to relieve himself. Palming himself through his pants. He moves to plant wet kisses against your thighs, making his way up. Face to face with him now, he rubs his nose softly against yours. Smiling against your cheek, he moves his finger to your red and swollen cunt sliding through your folds. His finger finds your entrance, slowly sliding in.

You gasp against his mouth. Pulling him in to taste yourself on his tongue. “Yeah? You like that? Am I making you feel good, love?”

“Mmmh, yeah, you always make me feel good” wrapping your arm around him and playing with the soft hair at the nape of his neck. He leans down to capture your lips, teeth clashing together, his tongue tasting you. His pace begins to pick up. You start to feel that burning sensation in your lower belly again. He knows when you’re about to finish. “Gonna cum on my fingers? Go on, show me how good I make you feel” he says in a low voice. The rapid rolling of his thumb on your clit tips you over the edge.

Jake pulls his fingers to his lips, wrapping them around his digits. “You taste so good. Just as sweet as I remember” Looking up at him, you desire something more from him. “Fuck me” This gets him wild. Standing to quickly pull his pants along with his boxer off. His hard cock hits his lower abdomen. You drool at the sight. Reaching out to take him into your grip. “Wanna suck my cock? Hmm?”

Looking up at him with a sultry look in your eyes “I want you to fuck me, Jake” you say in a soft voice. Smiling down at you he pushes you on your back, his bog body hovering over you. “I’ll do whatever you ask me to,” Taking his hard-on in his hand, giving himself a few strokes before rubbing himself against your spent cunt. “Fuck, oh my God” your eyes roll to the back of your head when he slowly lowers himself to you. Connecting your lips.

Entering you, taking his time with you. Sliding his hand into yours, grasping yours pushing it to the side of your head. His pace starts slow, and passionate, he’s sticking to his word about taking his time with you. “Faster” you whisper in his ear. His soft lips grazed your cheek, his breath hitting your ear. He places his hands on your waist and turns you onto your stomach.

Wrapping his arms around your front to hold you up. Quickly stroking himself, then entering you again. “C’mon baby, come for me. I know you can” The pleasure becoming too much with his pace. He’s fucking you hard, sloppy, messy, just like you asked. It all becomes overwhelming and you finally come all over his cock. Heavy breathing and panting fill the room once again.

After some seconds of catching your breath, you lie on your back, and Jake finds comfort on your chest. Staring at the ceiling everything starts to come back to you. The fight that lead you to this point. You realize that you didn’t do what you came here to do. Softly stroking his hair you speak up in the silence that you're left in. “Jake” you call out for his name. He moves his head to look up at you, humming in response. “What’s going on between us?” You’re left unanswered for a while. To be honest, you aren’t sure what you’re doing here, lying in his bed. Inhaling deeply he rises from your body and walks over to his bathroom.

He comes back with a wet towel in his hand and walks back to your lying figure on his bed. Gently parting your legs he wipes down your swollen cunt, being careful. You twitch slightly from the sensitivity. “I want us to be okay” he finally says. “I don’t like fighting with you. It breaks my heart knowing that I put you through hell and I’m not there to help fix it” throwing the towel into the basket next to his desk.

“If you want this to work,” you look at him. He stares at you waiting to hear the key to win your heart over again. “I want you to trust me. And you need to prove to me that I can trust you” you say sitting up and pulling his shirt over your head to cover yourself. Nodding immediately he pulls you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you, tightly. “Okay, I promise. I promise I’ll never put you through that again. I promise I’ll do everything I can to prove to you that I care for you, so much.” Only looking at him as he speaks.

“Baby” Jake has been spending most of his time at your place. Barely spending any time in his own home. You don’t see it as a burden, but you do feel like he’s only doing it to make up for his past actions. “Let me take you out,” He says as he lays on your chest, pulling your hands to run through his soft hair. “Okay, what do you want to do” looking down softly at his face. His hands hug tightly around your waist as he digs his face into your soft stomach.

“There’s a carnival downtown. We can go there, if you want” He waits patiently for your answer looking up at your face, glowing in the sunlight peeking through the blinds. “Yeah, we can go there” you agree. Jake excitedly pushes off the bed and walks over to the drawer where he has kept some of his clothes.

After the both of you finish getting ready you walk out of your dorm and walk down the steps. Hand in hand you begin your journey into town. Everything in your town is within walking distance, something you loved about it when you moved here. It was midday and shops were busy, everyone hustling to get everything they needed for the upcoming holiday. Being even more busy with the carnival in town.

A flower shop catches your eye, letting go of Jake’s hand you’re drawn to the pretty flowers of spring. When you walk into the shop you are instantly hit with the smell of flowers. Racks are filled with lively green plants, some tilting over their pots from being overgrown. This is one thing you will forever cherish in life. The life of growing plants. How they always manage to come back to life even after not being properly taken care of. The strength they have to keep going

While you were away admiring the beauty of the flowers you’re surrounded by, Jake walks up behind you. Placing a hand on the small of your back, he pulls from behind his back a small bouquet of magnolias. He must have bought them while you were distracted. Turning in his arms you wrap yours around his neck pulling him in closer to you. “Thank you, they’re beautiful” He places a small peck on the juncture of your neck. “Of course, baby. They’re beautiful, aren’t they? They always remind me of you”

Your lips form a small pout. Standing on your tip toes to place a delicate kiss on his lips. Sometimes his compliments only causes your heart to stop beating for a moment. Walking out of the flower shop you notice the sun beginning to set behind the busy town. “The carnival should be starting soon, we should get there now before it starts to get crowded.” He tightens his grip on your hand, making sure you don’t get lost in the crowd of people and guides you to the noisiest part of town.

The lights of the lively carnival glow brightly in your eyes. Hand clutching Jake’s in excitement, he looks down and smiles brightly back at you as you walk ahead of him. Impatiently running towards the game booths you pull him by your side, a way of telling him to hurry his slow pace. “Hello! Come on up and win a prize. Two balloons will get you this teddy bear,” The booth worker pulls out a small teddy plush from behind the counter, “Or~ Pop six balloons to win this plush!” he says with much enthusiasm. The man points to a bunny plush hung above the other small prizes. Jake steps before you and pulls out a ticket he had stored in his wallet. “How much?” Digging through the pockets he takes a few out to hand to the man. You watch as they exchange items, Jake holds ten darts in his hand and watches his aim. Throwing one of them, the loud pop of the balloon makes you jump slightly.

He goes on to throw another and another, until he gets down to his last dart. He misses, but he still manages to pop five balloons. “Congratulations! You’ve won yourself one of our small prizes, if you’d like to give it another go please come forward” Jake reaches his hand out for the small teddy bear and politely declines the man’s offer. He turns around to you, pushing the small plush into your arms. Looking down at the plush and up to him, he watches as a small smile grows on your lips. He wishes he could capture this moment and paste it into his head for the rest of eternity. Your illuminated features make him go crazy, making him experience feelings he’s never felt before.

Before he could say anything to you, you pushed off your heels to kiss his soft lips lovingly. “Thank you, baby” Grabbing his hand again you proceed to look around at the carnival. Lights are strung along different booths, the sound of children laughing can be heard all around, and the warmth in your chest begins to bloom. Feeling that warmth radiate off of you, dispersing among the many young souls surrounding you. Tugging Jake closer to you, once again pulling him with you, you point at the ferris wheel gesturing to the ride.

He agrees and lets you drag him towards the spinning wheel. The operator opens the door for you when the wheel comes to a stop. Jake steps in first and grabs your head to help you in. The ride begins to move again, the cold wind blowing through your flowing hair brings chills up your arms. Goosebumps appear up and down your arms. “Are you cold? Here,” he moves forward to take his jacket off and places it around your shoulders. The fabric engulfs you from how big it is compared to when it was wrapped around Jake’s body. “Thank you” tugging it closer to you.

The wheel stops at the very top; the view is breathtaking. But something else catches Jake’s attention, the way you look out over the town. The lights of the buildings of the town make it seem more alive. Something about that makes you feel content with where you are now in life. Moving forward for once instead of back. Turning your head to look at Jake again you find him already staring at you; admiring you. Your face falls into the palms of your hands as your cheeks turn red from embarrassment. “What?” he laughs. Moving his hands to pry your hands away from your face.

Peeking through your fingers you see his radiating smile. A soft giggle makes its way out of your mouth as you look at the adorable sparkle in his eyes. “Nothing, I just got shy” This gets him to laugh, pulling your cold hands into his warm ones on his lap. “There is nothing to be shy about, baby. It’s just me” Looking into his deep brown eyes, butterflies erupt in your belly. “That’s why,” you say. He looks at you with confusion written on his face. Your hands hold on to him just a little bit tighter. “Because it’s you Jake. You make me feel so many different things at once sometimes I refuse to believe that you’re real to me” laughing slightly. Jake still has no idea where this is coming from.

“I love you, Jake,” you say under your breath. The look in your eyes is close to pleading. Waiting for him to say it back. He only looks into your eyes until the ride comes back to life the grip you have on his jacket only becomes tighter than before. Your knuckles are white and crescent moons are indented into your skin by your nails. The ride stops at the bottom and the worker opens the door for you once again. You stay there for a moment until you realize that you are holding up the line. Thankfully, the worker was patient and still waited for you to exit the cart.

You can hear your heart pumping at a rapid speed in your ears. Throwing the jacket off of your shoulder you flee from the cart. Leaving Jake, by himself in utter silence. He feels frozen in his spot, not able to move. “Sir? We have other people waiting” Snapping out of his daze he collects his things and leaves, completely left in distraught.

Running, you can barely see. Your eyes clouded with tears, streaming down your face. You needed to get out of there. Tripping over a small rock you hiss out in pain. Looking down at your scraped knee you you cradle it in hopes of making it feel better. But you know it will do nothing. Nothing hurts more than how you feel right now.

He didn’t say it back.

He didn’t say it back

Like a broken record, it repeats in your head. Jake doesn’t love you back. And there’s completely nothing that you could do about it.

It’s been weeks since the carnival, and you haven’t heard anything from Jake since then. Not a text, not a phone call, not even a note. It’s like a never-ending cycle, just like Sunoo said. You can’t seem to find a way to escape it. Just like the last time you hide yourself away from the world. But only this time it’s worse. Your phone has been buzzing with notifications but from the person you’ve been pining for the most. Sunoo can’t help but be worried about you.

He’s been calling every day but he can’t get a hold of you. Avoiding your phone is the best option for now. Distancing yourself from anyone who has a connection with Jake is in your best interest. You can’t risk bumping into him, just the thought of his face further hurts your aching heart. Standing up from your bed you walk over to the kitchen to eat a somewhat decent meal. You’ve been rotting away in your bed for days now, being productive for just one day would be a step forward in healing.

“I don’t know what to do” The small cafe is close to empty, with only a few people sitting at tables scattered across the area, it’s well early into the morning for anyone to be out and about. Jake’s hands are connected to the top of the small table. One of his many friends, Sunghoon, is sitting across from him. Receiving a call from Jake he woke up bright and early to help his friend deal with what he considered ‘a major crisis’. “Well, do you love her?” The question is simple. But Jake can’t help but dwell on it for a minute too long. “I don’t know” Staring into the table as if his answer would show if he looked just a bit harder. Sunghoon sighs out of frustration, Jake has been a complete mess ever since you told him you loved him. Stuck in his own head, guilty, frustrated, regret spiraling through his body. You don’t deserve any of this. You deserve much more than what he has to offer. Malicious thoughts consumed his head.

“I think you should talk to her, man” Sunghoon finally speaks up in the quiet space. “She deserves closure, at the very least tell her how you feel for her. You can’t leave her hanging like that, I know that it’s crushing you from the inside that you can’t talk to her,” He’s right. He knows that he’s right. He hasn’t even tried to reach out to you in the weeks passing. “I know, I just can’t bring myself to face her knowing how much I’ve hurt her”

“Take a chance, talk to her.” After a few minutes of thinking, Jake nods his head. “I’ll see you later Hoon,” Before he could turn to leave he looks back to Sunghoon. “And thank you” Giving a tight lipped smile and a slight nod of his head he says “Anytime” The jingle of the bell on top of the door rings. Jake determined to talk to you and fix whatever he caused.

Loud banging resounds through your dorm as you were about to curl up in your blanket. “Go away Sunoo,” you yell in hopes of ridding him from your door. “Let me in” Your heart drops when you hear that familiar accent you were used to hearing all those weeks ago. Immediately shooting from your bed you grab your sweater and slowly walk over to the door. Watching your hand reach for the doorknob as if you were put into slow motion. Turning the handle, you look through the small crack of the door. Sad eyes meet yours.

The door now fully opened, Jake’s tall figure towers over yours. Eyes pleading you to let him in. “Hi,” comes from his mouth, the same coming from yours. “Can I please come in?” Your eyebrows furrow in confusion and slight anger. “Why? There’s no reason for us to be together, not anymore” You begin to close the door but he arm comes out to stop you.

“Please, __. I need to talk to you” The tone in his voice is desperate. Reluctantly you agree, stepping to the side you watch him walk past you into your living room closing the door and following behind him. It’s silent for sometime, arms crossing over your chest you grow impatient. “You said you wanted to talk, so talk. If not I’d really like for you to leave-”

“I’m sorry” Finally, after what felt like an eternity he speaks up. “I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you. I am so sorry I’ve hurt you in so many ways you and I’ve been nothing but shit to you” his voice breaks. A burning sensation builds up behind your eyes. Swallowing thickly he continues “You deserve nothing but love in this world and I can’t give you that. I’m messed up,” roughly pointing to his head. Tears streaming down his face. “I want to give you all the things that you deserve but I can’t do that because I don’t know how,” You flinch at his rising tone. You stand still, all you can do is listen to him.

“I want so much for us to work, baby but I-” He holds his hands out. Pleading for you to reach out to him. Quickly, taking a step forward you pull him into your arms. Your tears fall over him as he tightens his grip on you. “Shh, it’s okay. I can help you, but I need you to let me help you” you say calmly into his ears. Your shirt dampens as he sobs. His hands clutching onto you as if you’d disappear.

“Let me help you”

Separating from your body he looks at you. Sadness seeps from his eyes, and sniffles are the only thing heard in the small living room. “Let me love you, and when you’re ready you can do the same” Searching for anything, you hold his face and bring him down to your lips. Kissing his lips softly you pull away and lean your forehead against his. Sending him a loving look you look into his eyes, “Will you let me?” Nodding against you, you pull him in and he stuffs his face into the crook of your neck, softly kissing the skin there.

The sun is shining out in the warm summer air. Jake wanted to take you out once more before he had to head back to Brisbane. He had been planning to spend a few weeks there during the summer. Talking about those plans bring you back when you and him were in bed, hot skin against each other. Relishing in one another “I promise I’ll take you there, one day. You can meet everyone. My parents have been dying to meet you, you know,” Smiling at him his eyes seemed to be focused on your hands playing with his. “I’d like that” you say with a small giggle.

You wish for that day to come soon, but you will just have to wait. Right now, you want to focus on the last remaining time you have left with your boyfriend before he’s off boarding a plane and wishing him a safe flight. That’s something for you to think about in the future. But this is now, he’s brought you back to the very first date he took you on. The magnolia forest, it looks much different than how it did in the winter. They look much more lively, swaying the slight breeze mother nature is kind enough to give them.

You both stop at the bench that brings you bittersweet memories. Sitting down, taking in the fresh air of summer, Jake watches you as if you’re some goddess sent down from heaven. Feeling his stare on you, you turn your head to catch him in the act. “What?” a smile appearing on your beautiful face. “What? I can’t stare at my girlfriend that I won’t be able to see in a few weeks? I need to take in how beautiful you are in person. I mean, I’ll only be able to see this pretty face over a screen,” he glides his hand down your cheek resting it on the nape of your neck.

“Ugh, don’t even remind me. I’m gonna miss you so much” pouting at him. He laughs at your adorable face and leans in to place a peck on your pouting lips. “I’m gonna miss you too, baby. More than anything” You can see a sparkle glow in his eyes as he scans over you face. Leaning in once again to kiss him. But this time, the kiss is full of passion, love. Pulling back your faces inches apart, you sigh as you open your eyes again to face your lover.

“I love you” Your breath hitches in your throat. The biggest smile grows over your features. The foreign words escape his mouth, smiling proud of himself to express his unconditional love for you. “What did you say?” you sit up from your slouched position on the bench and turn your body to completely face. “I said I love you __, so much” Throwing your body as him you smash your lips against his. He can feel a smile grown against his lips.

Finally, words are written on paper. This is your beginning

#sim jaeyun #jake sim #enhypen jake #enhypen fic #enhypen angst #enhypen smut #enhypen fluff #enhypen #jake fic #jaeyun fluff #enhypen jaeyun #jaeyun smut #jaeyun angst #jaeyun imagines

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showtoonzfan · 5 months

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Okay so I saw S1E2 of HH “Video killed the radio Star” so here’s my thoughts on that, ⚠️SPOILERS⚠️

- So once again, the pacing is all over the place. In the span of 2 episodes we have to deal with introducing Adam and Lute, the main characters of the hotel, the three V’s and Sir Pen, and I don’t like how the three V’s are introduced in the second episode of season 1. Like…can we just let the characters we know breathe and get to know them before you introduce new ones?? Told you this was going to be like Helluva lol.

- So hell is freaking out that the extermination got moved to 6 months later, but Charlie of course isn’t the focus of this episode. It’s mainly the three V’s + Angel/Al/Sir Pen. It still bothers me that the reason behind redeeming sinners is not because Charlie is sick of Hell being a damnation but because she doesn’t want them to be exterminated. It’s such a drastic change from the pilot and the character motivation that it still throws me off sorry.

- So, I actually like Vox. I take back bitching about Christian Borle playing him because while his suave voice may not fit the twink design, he does a fantastic job either way as expected, making Vox an intimidating person. I had thought before that Vox was going to just be this dumb henchman, but I actually like how he’s the runner of things. He’d be so cool if he didn’t curse and talk like every other character in the show though.

- Good GOD Valentino. I already shared how I felt about him when the dialogue leaks came out, but I HATE how his character is just this idiot man baby who throws temper tantrums and legit needs to be “calmed down” by Vox because he’s such an idiot. Like…Velvette calls him a piss baby and Vox legit had to talk to him as if he was one, that’s how dumb this guy is. There’s a scene where Vox asks what they should do about the hotel and Val says “just put something inside, that’s how I get the bitches”- like…kill me. The fan interpretations were better. He was actually someone you didn’t want to mess with and had an intimidating voice, here he’s a whiny baby that you have to remind yourself is the same guy who forces himself on Angel. The Addict and comic version of this character is not the same as the one we have now. His voice is too high pitch, it sucks and his accent goes on and off constantly. Viv can’t write abusers for shit, she sees everything as a joke. Again, how are we supposed to take abuse seriously if this is how you portray your abuser. Crimson is more intimidating than this joke of a cockroach.

- Alastor has been gone for seven years, yeah that “Lilith is Rosie and Al is working for her”- allegation is 100% true like it perfectly lines up together since Lilith has also been gone for seven years. Only for Alastor, it makes no sense. Like…wdym he’s been gone for seven years. The pilot is canon and they state he’s been at the hotel for a week. Alastor was literally walking around town when Charlie was on the news. Do they mean that it’s been years since he’s done his radio show? Viv, when you retcon shit you need to specify. You’re just confusing everyone again.

- They need to explain why exactly it’s dangerous to make a deal with Alastor because all this vagueness isn’t helping the story. The whole reason Vox sends Sir Pen out to be a spy was to make sure Charlie didn’t make a deal with him, yet you literally have Vaggie making a deal with him like it was nothing in the last episode. I also fail to see why exactly Vox cares about Charlie making a deal with Alastor in the first place. Is it because he doesn’t want Al to have more power? Is it because he doesn’t want Charlie to have power? EXPLAIN.

- Yay more retconning and woobifying. So Angel Dust is a whiny wimpy bitch in this episode, he’s very out of character. When Sir Pen comes to the hotel, he’s extra pressed about that, when in the pilot he couldn’t even take Sir Pen seriously and was acting nonchalant towards him. Then when Charlie starts getting all giddy and complimenting Pen, Angel gets sad and jealous??? This is the second fucking episode of season 1. I thought the whole point about Angel and the hotel was that he didn’t trust Charlie nor take the redemption stuff seriously. Now apparently he wants her approval? And then when he finds Pen out, Pen insults him and that causes Angel to just fucking lunge at him and start punching. When did Angel get this goddamn sensitive. Why did the wimpy snake character who’s supposed to be a loser get under his skin THAT much? It’s even more jarring because the last episode Angel was literally saying he loves being exploited and in the pilot he’s presented as someone who could give less of a shit of what other people think, now a simple jab at him being a slut made him go off. Remember when Travis called him a slut in the pilot and Angel just laughed it off? What happened to that Angel lol.

- Vaggie has a line that flat out calls Angel a sexual harasser. And yet we’re supposed to feel bad for him and root for HuskerDust. Makes perfect sense Viv, fuck you. She has no idea what sexual harassment even is because she sees actual harassment as quirky funny jokes and paints it as genuine love. Pick a side. Is Angel an asshole who sexually harasses people or is he an uwu baby who deserves to be with Husk. Clearly Viv chose the second option.

- I liked Vox and Al’s song, tho I wish it was more singing instead of talking. Charlie’s song in the end was boring but at least it was short. I still don’t know how to feel about Pen being at the hotel tho. Like I get he’s a loser and not a big threat but him happily joining the hotel now is way too structurally fast. There’s a lot of things that feel like Viv changed at the last minute compared to the pilot and it shows. Pilot was better.

That’s it, not looking forward to the third one which is HuskerDust focused (female centric show my ass)

#vivziepop critical #spindlehorse critical #hazbin hotel critical #anti vivziepop #Hazbin critical

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eclairfromleclerc · 4 months

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Hello people! It’s been a while since my last chapter but the writer’s block was humongous and I kept pushing myself to write the next chapter. It is another long one, almost 25K words. Please excuse me for my long ass absence and stay with me for the rest of the story! I hope you’ll enjoy the newest part and I can’t wait to see your opinion and comments on it. Take care. Until the next one <3 xx

All’s Fair

(Toto Wolff x Reader!Horner) Chapter 9

chapter 1 chapter 2 chapter 3 chapter 4 chapter 5 chapter 6 chapter 7 chapter 8

Monaco has the best sunny days in the whole world. You’ve loved going out under the Mediterranean sun every time your family visited Monaco when you were young. Now laying on the couch that you’ve spent almost all of your summers on, you see the light entering the apartment. Music plays in the background as your friend Sara is making coffee in the kitchen and you are laying in her living room as you’ve always done.

After the victory celebrations on Sunday you left the track and flew straight back to Nice. Your childhood friend Sara picked you up and you’ve been staying in her family’s house in Monaco for the past 2 days. Those days passed by with your usual activities. Having coffee in the casino square, going out clubbing, cooking, gossiping and in general doing girly things. As soon as you arrived in Monaco you visited the apartment that Sara proposed and booked it right away as you had already asked for your belongings to be moved to Monte Carlo. The only thing left for you to do is to move all of those things to the apartment. The thing about being in Monaco is that now you are able to show the world where you are. During the past weekend there was just speculation about where you actually were. You had managed to place yourself in Monaco with some instagram posts but no one knew (well except for Toto and Lewis) that you still were in Jeddah.

“Sweetheart coffee is ready.” Sara yells from the kitchen

“Bitch I don’t drink coffee” you answer “You haven’t seen me in a month and you already forgot?”

“Shut up, I made you your Earl Grey just how you like to drink it” she says and you’ve already made your way to the kitchen

“Thank you idiot” you tell her

“You’re welcome, your majesty,” she says, mocking you for your tea preferences. You sit down opposite to her and start drinking your tea. “So” she interrupts the silence “Do you remember Marc?” she asks

“Marc who?” you ask

“Marc Taylor.”

“S, are you serious? Are you asking me if I remember the guy I had a crush on for ages?” you ask her

“Well you’ve met a lot of people since you started working in F1 and I genuinely thought you forgot him” she says “Anyways, he saw the story I reposted from yesterday night at Jimmy’z and replied to it. He asked me if we wanted to join him today.”

“Join him where?” you ask intrigued

“He will be having a brunch party at his yacht.” she says trying to hype it up

“Ugh, I’m not sure I want to see so many people.” you say

“Come on Horner, it’s going to be so great. We haven’t had a brunch party at a yacht in ages, the last time we did was when you graduated.” she pauses “Plus he told me not to hype it up, the only people there will be his friend group.”

“Marc’s friend group is 15 people. I am only willing to see 5.”

“Why are you acting like a 65 year old with depression, come onnn.”

“Because my job drains me to the point that I just want to stay at home with a cup of tea and read a good book. I am with people every day and during the weekend I am chased by cameras and fans.” you tell her as she looks at you mockingly “I know, I know. I chose this life and to be frank I love the whole fame,chase and clout that comes with it. But during my non-race weekends, I need to have a detox.”

“You had your whole week off, enough paddock detox, enough people detox. What were you doing in Jeddah? Meditating, visiting the four seasons’ spa, drinking coffee, eating expensive meals. That’s enough, now we get to party.”

Little does she know that you weren’t actually meditating, not visiting spas, not even staying at a four seasons’ but at a Ritz. You take a look at your best friend as she puts on her puppy eyes.

“Pretty please.” she says and she crosses her hands as if she’s begging “Do it for me Horner, it’s going to be fun. It’s part of your new life after all. People here in Monaco have brunch yacht parties really often, so you better get your ass ready. We are going.” she says.

You shrug in response, but actually get up from the chair and go to the guest room where all of your belongings currently are. You open your suitcase and take out the sundress you wore the day you and Toto went for coffee together and match it with a pair of Hermes sandals. The weather is now sunny in Monaco and you actually love how it is a great mix of sun, breeze and heat. You put on some makeup and style your hair as loosely as you can, you’re going to be in the sea after all. Later both you and Sara leave the house and go to the location that Marc dropped a pin on. You can hear people talking from the other side of the yacht, the one that faces the Mediterranean. You quickly jump on the platform on the back of the yacht and walk up to the place where everyone’s sitting.

“Hello everyone.” you say and you see Marc standing up approaching you. Sara is just behind and she waves everyone but doesn’t get any closer to you. Marc comes to your side and hugs you.

“Miss Horner.” he says in awe “It’s been a long long time hasn’t it?” he asks

“It has. Thank you for the invitation.” you say “We brought a little something.” you say and you hand him the bottle of Dom that you’ve been holding.

“It’s really no big deal, I wanted to see you and Sara so I just texted. Thanks for the Champagne.”

By the time both of you stop interacting, Sara is already sitting on the table and speaking to everyone. You take a seat, far from her in the only two empty chairs and Marc emerges shortly after to take the seat next to you. Without asking he starts filling your plate.

“You should definitely try the Croque Madame, it’s a miracle.” he says and you smile at him

“I will, thanks.” you reply as you register his existence next to you. He’s the most charming guy you’ve met, well less than Toto but to be frank, you can see why you were heads over heels with him. At that moment you decide to snap a photo and text Toto.

You

[Photo]

Much earned gift for my last week’s performance

Wolff

You better recharge, I want you on your A level in Baku.

[Photo]

The weather here is freaking awful, I miss Monaco.

You

Wait, you actually know how to send pictures? Monaco is amazing today. You should have been here.

Wolff

Replying: Remember who gives you access to the paddock.

If I were there you wouldn’t be in that yacht right now.

You

Toto behave, you’re at work.

Wolff

I’m at a business meeting and I hate those so why not distract myself with some other thought.

You

Because I’m so hot you’re going to embarrass yourself. Gotta go now, I've got a whole yacht waiting for me

Wolff

I don't blame them. Have fun, just not too much ;)

You laugh at Toto’s texts as Marc watches you at the same time

"Are you bored of us" he asks

"No, I just have to text someone" you reply

"Red Bull keeps getting you busy I see?" he asks

"Actually, I am not in Red Bull for the time being, I am just enjoying myself and I am actually moving here next week"

"Great decision to be honest. Monaco could use a distraction." He says

"So I've been told" you tell him

"By whom?" he asks and you realize you cannot possibly talk about Toto with him

"Just a good friend" you laugh

“ah one of those best friends, I get it" he says and you nod not showing any emotion at all over what it meant

“Are you enjoying yourself in F1?” he asks trying to start conversation with you

“I am. It is a space I’ve grown up in and I already knew everyone as well as everyone knew me. There’s nothing different as to what I’ve lived up to now except for the fact that I have a little bit more screen time than I used to have 5 years ago.”

“Well 5 years ago I used to see you almost every week and now I have to watch F1 to see you.” he says

“You watch F1 now?”

“I always watched F1.” he says

“I’m pretty sure you’ve only watched the Monaco Grand Prix.”

“Until this year.” he replies “Plus I have a really good reason.”

“What’s the reason? Max’s racecraft?”

“Nah, you are” he says and you freeze temporarily

“I’m flattered.”

“I meant it as a compliment so you should be.” he tells you and he looks at you with a flirty look and you turn to look at Sara who is already too invested in her conversation with Marc’s friend, Tristan.

The rest of the brunch party goes on in a pretty similar way. Marc keeps flirting with you and Sara is way too busy to come to your rescue. At some point the yacht leaves Monaco and sails in the Mediterranean for two or three hours while all of you party on the deck. Now the sun is setting down the horizon and you return back to the harbor of Monaco and the party has already winded down so you find yourself sitting on a chair sipping your last glass of champagne. Sara is nowhere to be seen, probably too busy making out with Tristan on the inside of Marc’s yacht since they’ve been missing for the last 45 minutes or so. The chair opposite to you is empty but not for long. As soon as Marc spots you he leaves his friends and comes to your company.

“Did you enjoy the party?” he asks

“It’s been a while since I partied like this but I loved it. Now relaxing with a glass of champagne is the must thing to do.”

“There’s plenty of space inside if you want to lay down for a while.” he tells you

“I think the space might be occupied by our friends and as close as I am with Sara today isn’t the day that I want to listen to her having sex with your best friend.” you laugh

“The yacht has 6 cabins. I very much doubt all 6 of them are taken.”

“6 cabins huh? The Taylors really have given it some thought before spending money on this yacht.”

“Yeah, my mom insisted. But hey, that’s why we’re working our asses off every day. To spend on things like this.”

“So you are working?” you ask him

“Yeah, I’ve taken over some of my dad’s companies and I’ve been living between Monaco and Switzerland for a while.”

“And how is it?”

“You know how it is. We’ve learnt to live in this world. I love the job but really that’s all I focus on. Thank god all these fuckers are around and remind me that I need to have a work life balance.”

“Oh my god. Marc Taylor is a workaholic?” you say surprised “You need people to remind you to live for a while instead of working?”

“My mom is so afraid that I won’t even have a wife that she’s trying to get me to meet eligible bachelorettes.”

“Lisa is actually doing this?” you ask shocked

“Lisa has been asking me to ask you on a date for months” he tells you and you laugh hysterically.

“Well tell Lisa that I am twice the workaholic that you are. I am not working and living, I am living my life at work. I am constantly working.”

“How does it feel?”

“It does get a little lonely at times. But as you’ve said I’ve learnt to live like this ever since I was a baby. Sometimes I just wish I had someone to support me.” you tell him and what he does next surprises you.

He leans closer and puts a hand on your cheek and kisses you. You don’t react. Partly because you were caught completely off guard and partly because your 19 year old self would die for this kiss but the only thing in your head that played over and over again is “You can’t do this to Toto” . He pulls away from the kiss and you smile but he’s looking for something more and you know it.

“Marc, look I am so flattered that you actually like me. My 19 year old self would be dead right now. But as much as I used to like you then, I cannot do it now.”

“You’re not into it huh?” he asks partly heartbroken partly surprised

“It’s not that. It’s that there’s someone else in my life right now and the things with me and him aren’t that simple so I wouldn’t want to further complicate it.”

“I understand.” he says “Although Lisa would be thrilled to have you as her daughter in law, I have to destroy her dreams.” he laughs

“I am so sad. Tell her I love her regardless and if I end up alone you’ll be the first one I will flirt with.”

“Bold way to tell me I am the second option.”

“Oh god no that’s not how I meant it. It’s just that you never know how life will play out. We might end up married managing the Taylor Group and Red Bull Racing, but we might just end up as two workaholic friends who push each other out of their working space.”

“That’s true.” he says

For the next 10 minutes you discuss and when the yacht finally arrives at the harbor you leave the yacht before thanking everyone. You and Sara walk back home and she keeps talking about her and Tristan during the whole way to her house. You keep quiet about the whole thing with Marc and let her vent about what happened for the rest of the day. Late at night just when you’re ready to go to sleep, her in her bed and you on an inflatable mattress Sara is still talking about Tristan.

“He actually texted me like 5 minutes ago, I can’t believe it.” she says “We are plann-”

“Marc kissed me.” you say interrupting her mid sentence

“WHAT?” she screams and jumps on her bed

“Yeah, you were too busy screwing Tristan on those cabins but when we arrived at the harbor, he sat down next to me and kissed me.”

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” she asks completely shocked

“Because you were venting about Tristan and I knew you would react this way.” you answer

“Well why aren’t you reacting in this way? You’ve had a crush on him since forever.” she asks

“Had. Past tense.”

“Well, do you have someone better than Marc to hook up with? His father is a freaking billionaire and he’s about to inherit all this. He’s handsome and kind and he’s everything you’ve ever dreamed of.”

“Yeah, now he’s not the one I am dreaming of. Plus, believe it or not, it’s not always about the money.”

“Are you out of your mind? Who is possibly a better option than Marc for you right now? Well, to be frank Charles Leclerc is. You’re not sleeping with Charles Leclerc are you?” she asks and you laugh

“If you actually knew who the guy who is the better option you’d definitely think I’m out of my mind. And no, I am not sleeping with Charles Leclerc, sadly.” you tell her

“If you don’t spill, I will kick you out.”

“I most definitely cannot tell you.”

“Come on, we’ve known each other since we were in the womb, your family is my family, what tells you that I could possibly say anything to anyone?”

“Okay, I will tell you, just because you actually are my best friend. But don’t you dare say anything to anyone or I will be destroyed. Oh, tell me your wildest prediction.”

“Just so that I have a clear target group, he is from F1 right?” she asks and you nod “Omg, is it Max? Because if it is Max it will be the most iconic friends to lovers boo-” she starts ranting and you interrupt to shock her once again

“It’s Toto Wolff”

“WHO?” she looks at you like you are a lunatic.

“It’s freaking Toto Wolff, Team Principal of Mercedes AMG Petronas F1” you tell her and she looks absolutely shocked

“You are definitely out of your freaking mind. Since when are you into older guys and how the hell did that happen?”

“I always thought he was attractive but was blindsided by Christian’s hate for him. But long story short, I got drunk once and we hooked up and it’s only been going downhill from there. I’ll have to explain it to you when I get to my new apartment.”

“I am absolutely shocked.” she says “Is he at least treating you right?” she asks

“We are just hanging out but he’s been decent I’d say.”

“Now that I am thinking about it, he kind of is the better option.” she says and she visibly loses herself in thought

“Just so you know, the only people who know about all this are you and Lewis.”

“I have a common secret with Lewis Hamilton?” she asks, showing her clear preference for him.

Your answer is to just laugh and then say goodnight to her.

The next day you are being woken up by the light entering the room from the window that you forgot to close. It’s the day that you will finally move to your new apartment in Monaco. You grab your phone first thing and you see millions of notifications, more than usual. Your first thought? Something bad happened. And indeed something had happened, not exactly bad, but the headlines from the news, tweets and tags are somewhere in between the tone of

“Red Bull Racing’s newest management addition shows her love with a billionaire’s son in Monaco.”

The first article wrote: Miss Horner and Mr. Marc Taylor were spotted getting cozy at the latter’s yacht party in Monaco harbor yesterday. The pair shared a kiss and they seemed to exchange some fond words. We are excited about this new romance blooming in the streets and seas of Monaco. Are we going to see the Taylor Group entering F1 alongside Miss Horner’s Red Bull Racing? It’s only a matter of time to see.

“Shit, shit, shit” you keep saying and Sara who has only woken up looks at you like you’re crazy

“What?” she asks

“It’s all over the freaking internet.”

“You and Wolff?” she asks nervously

“No, god, it’s me and Marc”

“Wait, how did that happen?”

“Someone must have snapped a picture of us while we were kissing when the yacht was in the harbor. God this is a disaster.”

“Why is it a disaster?” she asks. Well sometimes you really doubt about her having a brain

“If Toto sees this he’s going to be feral.” you say “Oh god, I should text him right now to let him know that the whole thing is a lie.” You open the iMessage app

Wolff

[Photo]

Flying to Nice from the UK, I’ll be in Monaco for the rest of the week.

You check the time that this was sent. Yesterday afternoon. You were probably at the party then and you accidentally deleted the notification so you didn’t see the message afterwards but now you decide to reply.

You

I hope that you have arrived in Monaco safely. I am sure I will see you somewhere here before we get the chance to meet all alone. Sorry I didn’t reply earlier but I must have accidentally deleted the notification while I was at that yacht party yesterday. Speaking of which, I need to talk to you about the whole thing going around on the internet.

You see that your messages are being instantly read but you get no reply.

“The moving truck will be arriving at the apartment in 20 minutes, we must get going. Come on, get ready.” Sara says

“S, Toto is leaving me on read, do you think he’s mad at me?”

“No, he’s probably too busy in those company meetings back at Brackley.” she tries to reassure you

“Toto flew to Monaco yesterday afternoon, he’s not at Brackley.” you tell her

“Well, he’s still working from Monaco so he might reply to you later. Girl, we really don’t have time for this. It’s moving dayyy.” she says trying to hype you up. “Up, up, up” she says trying to grab you “The moving guys will be at the apartment and you will be lying here all day? Let’s get ready to move in. You’ll worry about Wolff later. And at the end you told me that you’re just hanging out, it's not anything serious so you’re free to do whatever you want. And if he’s sure that you want him he won’t even believe those things.”

You stand up before replying and put on a pair of sweats and a Red Bull t-shirt to be comfortable while moving in. “I know that we’re just hanging out at the moment. It’s just that the things are confusing as it is now, I don’t want Marc Taylor confusing them more than that.”

“He won’t. But you’ll have to worry about it from your new bedroom so, shoes on, grab your bag and let’s go to the apartment.

You do as she says and 20 minutes later you are outside your newest home getting the keys from the owner while the guys are removing boxes and furniture from the truck.

“Well, you are here.” Sara says. “I have to confess it looks really pretty and modern.”

“Sara, it’s just the outside of the building.”

“But still it’s pretty. The actual apartment is prettier though” she says and she instructs all of the boxes with your belongings and furniture to be moved to the 6th floor. For the first time in your life you will be living at the top of a building. You and Sara take the elevator to the apartment. You unlock the door while the guys are waiting for you and you enter using your right foot first.

“It’s for good luck.” you say to Sara and she smiles doing the same

For the next 5 hours you and Sara assemble your furniture and unpack the boxes with all of your stuff. You show her your ideas on how to put everything into place as you’ve imagined it and as you’ve seen it on your pinterest moodboards. At some point both of you try to settle the bed in your master bedroom. A new queen sized bed that you bought after seeing how big the room is. The one side of the loft is covered in full length glass windows that have a great view to the mediterranean with a huge balcony just in front of them that you will probably enjoy your morning tea in, during the non race weeks. The light enters every room, giving them a great coziness and openness. While you two are trying to move the bed just in the right place you remember that now you happen to have neighbors.

“Shit S, are we making too much noise?” you ask

“Well, if you know another way that we can move this monster bed and not make a sound, let me know.”

“What if the neighbors are annoyed?”

“They can fuck themselves, it’s not even quiet hours yet.” she says and you help her do the job.

After the bed gets in the right place you lay there for a second

“Horner, come on, what are you doing?”

“I am too overwhelmed by this, we’ve been working for 5 hours nonstop and this thing isn’t anywhere close to a living apartment.” you tell her

“Oh and wait till I leave you to go to the gym.” she says

“Come on Sara, you are working out here can’t you just skip the gym today and help me a little with those boxes?”

“I’ve been doing it for the past 5 hours if that says something to you. I will be leaving in half an hour though. And don’t worry. You can take it one step at a time and after some time you will manage to unpack your whole stuff.” she says smiling

“I hate you.” you tell her and you go back to work.

You set your new office in the living room, just in front of the large window so that you get enough light and inspiration from the views outside. You also set the couch and the coffee table in front, as well as your new TV. Half an hour later Sara leaves indeed for the gym, leaving you all alone for the first time in your newest apartment. That’s when it hits you and you grab your phone. The messages you sent to Toto, still unanswered and it’s been a long time since he’s read them. You decide to give him a call. You press his phone number and wait for him to pick up. You hear one, then two, then three rings and then it goes straight to voicemail. You hear his voice that you haven’t heard since Sunday. The phone rang but it went to voicemail which means that he’s declining your call. You try once again, the same thing. You get it, he’s probably angry with the whole thing but if he doesn’t want to talk to you nor do you. Instead of overthinking it you throw yourself back at moving. You blast some Taylor Swift on the speakers that you connected first thing as you entered the loft, and drop a huge box of books in front of you which you put on the built-in shelves in the living room. You use your ladder to fill the upper shelves that you cannot reach by yourself. You keep dancing, moving things, chairs, couches and tables. At some point you hear the door knocking. You turn the music off and run to the door.

“Who is it?” you ask and you hear a voice from the outside of the door

“I live downstairs and I wanted to let you know that it’s quiet time now, you are annoying us with all that music and moving things.” the voice says. You feel very embarrassed about what you did and the last thing you want is to piss your neighbor off so you decide to open the door and apologize. But when you do you freeze.

“Toto?” you say and he looks at you, his eyes wide as if he just saw something unbelievable

“What are you doing here ?” he asks

“This is my new apartment in Monaco, I was just moving in.”

“You’re joking.” he says

“Do you actually live downstairs?” you ask thrilled

“I do yeah, I live on the fifth floor loft.” he says

“How was England?” you ask and he looks at you.

“Fine.” he replies, obviously bothered.

“I’ve been meaning to talk to you, I texted you this morning but you didn’t reply.” you say “I also tried calling but it went to voicemail.”

“Talk to me about what?” he asks acting like he doesn’t know

“About Marc Taylor. Toto, I know you’ve seen it, it’s all over the internet.”

“I mean what would you possibly have to say about Marc Taylor? It’s a shared secret that you’ve been wanting him since high school, everyone in Monaco knows it. You must be over the moon though. Handsome, rich, young and charming. Everything you’re looking for.”

“You have to believe me Toto.”

“Believe you about what? You clearly wanted the guy since forever so why not give in?”

“You fucking know that the whole thing is fake.”

“There are pictures,” he says, keeping calm.

“You know how it fucking is Toto, those reporters only take whatever they think will make people engage more with their stories. They only caught the kiss but after that I told him that there is someone else in my life.”

“I wouldn’t know. I am not the one going around boat parties in Monaco and kissing strangers.”

“Just admit you are jealous.” you say

“Now you know what? I find it really pretentious that you get to be angry with the whole Cynthia thing and I am suddenly overreacting to seeing you kiss other guys.”

“It is not the same.”

“No, it is exactly the same and your position is way worse than mine because me and Cynthia haven’t seen each other since this thing started.” he says

“Well, it’s not like this “thing” is something exclusive so I can see and kiss whomever I want.” you say

Toto turns and looks at you and this is the first time you see a kind of hurt in his eyes

“Do you ever shut up Horner?” he asks

“I’ve told you before, only if I am made.” you say and look at him

Hearing these words probably makes a bell in Toto’s head ring because the next thing he does is to grab you by both hands and pin you against the wall like he did the first time he kissed you. He looks down at you as you look up at him and he leans in to kiss you but you push him just a little and grab his hand. You put it against your neck and once he gets the memo he applies a little pressure that makes you go crazy. He kisses you slowly and you kiss him back in enjoyment. A few seconds later he grabs you and runs into the hallway searching for your bedroom. Once he finds the bedroom with the queen size bed he rushes and pushes you to the bed. You lie on your back looking at him. The power that this man holds, you think. You slowly begin to undress him, freeing him of his gray sweatpants and leaving him only with his boxers on seeing him growing hard as he looks at you.

“Is the bed new?” he asks and you nod

“What a way to use it for the first time huh?” you say and he laughs

“Let me tell you something Horner, I don’t want you anywhere near me with a red bull shirt ever again” he says and he strips you off of the red bull shirt “It’s the biggest turn off.”

“I can see it” you tease him. At first he seems pissed off but then he takes your sweats off and then he does the same with his T-Shirt.

“Enough talking” he says and he leans in for a kiss which you deepen immediately. He leans in on you and you push him towards you from his neck as he stabilizes himself by putting one of his knees between your thighs. You feel the intrusive thought in your brain and you grind yourself on his knee

“Much needy I see ?" he asks and you do nothing but look at him

“Can’t resist mister Wolff” you say

“As you should miss Horner.” he replies and his hand moves to your chest while he starts kissing you on your neck. You feel him leaving hot trails of kisses on you as his hand cups your breast. Well he certainly has a way of doing things. His kisses leave you wanting more, needing more so to make yourself feel good you move your hips against him once again and you can feel him laugh against your skin as he moves his hand against your panties

“So wet already” he whispers to your ear sending shivers down your spine “Does he also do that to you?” he asks clearly, talking about Marc. You shake your head as the words were kind of hard to come off your mouth

“Use your words baby” he says

“No, he does not” you say while your breathing is getting heavier

“Is he better?” he asks and you shake your head once again.

“Toto please, I need you.” you say and he obeys to your plea.

He removes his briefs and pushes your panties to the side as he enters inside you. It feels good. Better than it had in Jeddah. You gasp at the move and you dig your nails on his back as he kisses you. He suddenly grabs your hands and removes them from his back while thrusting in and out in a slow but great way.

“No touching today.” he says and holds your hands over your head with his strong grip. He keeps moving as you let small moans escape and you feel like you’re in another word. You want to touch him as well and right the time that he loosens his grip on you you try to move your hands but his grip gets stronger and smashes your hands back to the place they first were. You complain for a while but he makes you feel so good that this is the last thing you care about.

“You’re so good love. Always feeling so good.” the pauses between his words are getting bigger, showing that he’s feeling as good as he does. “Good god.” he says once again and you laugh at him. He keeps going strong though, changing the tempo of his thrusts, hitting and touching all the correct places. You feel getting closer and closer to your climax but instead of laying calm you start leaving kisses on his chest.

“You make me feel so good.” you say “Fuck Toto, you’re so good. God no you’re perfect.”

“Are you close?” he asks

“Yeah” you say and you gasp “You?”

“Very” he says in between his grunts. Some minutes later you come first and he follows you shortly after while repeating your name.

Right after that both of you lay naked on your new bed. Toto is caressing your hair as you are laying on his chest listening to his heartbeat. He breaks the silence first

“Are we good?” he asks

“I am good” you reply

“I am talking about our fight.” he says

“Oh I thought that it was established when you were repeating my name while having sex with me.”

“You’re right.” he says and stares outside the window while the sun is setting. Both of you sit in silence for a minute or two until you break it

“He’s not better.” you say

“Huh?”

“Marc Taylor. He’s not better than you. It was nothing but a kiss, Toto.” you tell him “And yes, he might be a European billionaire’s son and he might as well be hot and charming but you are also all those things, which surprise, happen to be everything I seem to look for in a man. But I need you to know Toto, in my eyes you are more charming and hotter than him. I would give Marc Taylor up for you but I wouldn’t give up you for Marc Taylor.” you tell him and you look up at him while he’s staring at you, clearly paying attention to what you were telling him.

“Thank you.” he says

You keep laying there and by the time the sun sets you are already asleep. You wake up an hour later and you see Toto is also taking a nap. You nudge him and he wakes up.

“What is it ?” he says being somewhere between asleep and awake

“Nothing, we just fell asleep here.” you say

“You’ve got a nice bed. Good choice.” he says

“I know but I have to get up to finish the rest of the apartment.”

“No one is helping you?” he asks

“Sara was here until she abandoned me to go to her gym session. Now I have to do this all by myself.”

“You know you don’t have to do all of it today right? You are going to be exhausted. Plus I can also help you with unpacking.”

“No, you probably have work to do. I’ll do them by myself and tomorrow Sara will be here to help me”

“Who is Sara?”

“My best friend. She’s the one that found this apartment for me” you tell him

“So she’s the one that I have to thank?” he asks and you nod while laughing.

“You will meet her as soon as I get back to Red Bull.”

“Which is going to be when?” he asks

“I know you want to get rid of me but I don’t have any information yet. Beth usually sends me my schedule the week before each grand prix and judging by the fact that she didn’t send it until now, I think this won’t be the weekend you are looking forward to.”

“Maybe you should start packing your things for Baku.” he says

“I don’t have anything to do there.”

“Come on, I told people Mindy Rosevelt will hang with us for a while longer.”

“Second race at Mercedes?” you ask excitedly

“The Ritz in Baku has already been informed that we would like an extra suite.”

“Toto, a suite? Again?”

“You always need a suite, love.”

“Do you have plans for Baku?” you ask

“How about we go to the paddock together, you sleep in my suite and you help us during the race?”

“So you only want me to be there to tell you about Red Bull’s strategies so you can win?” you say playing offended

“I only want you to be there because you make it easier for me to focus when you are next to me rather than in the garage next to ours. And because I want you in general.” he says

“That’s a good excuse.” you tell him

“After all, even if it was only for the strategy part, you should remember that all’s fair in war.”

“And love.” you say

“That also” he replies

“When are we leaving?”

“Wednesday night, with my jet from Nice airport.”

“Good.” you say

“Put some clothes on, we are going to unpack the rest of the boxes.” he says

“Yes sir.” you say

“Sir huh? Remind me of that the next time I am laying in bed with you” he tells you and you laugh as you stand up to put some clothes on. For the rest of the evening you and Toto unpack the boxes that you and Sara left. Both of you laugh as he makes fun of your music taste. He even dared to make fun of Taylor Swift, which you did not take lightly but still forgave him when he danced with you in the living room of your new apartment and when you both watched the harbor from the balcony. It is almost midnight when he decides he has to go.

“Why do you have to go now?” you ask

“The apartment is almost ready, Sara can help you set up the last box and I have to work tomorrow, unlike you.”

“You are literally working from home and your home is downstairs, why can’t you stay for the night and leave tomorrow night?” you complain

“Because this is your apartment, your space. You have to spend the night alone to get used to the feeling.”

“I’ve lived alone before, I know how it is.”

“Yes but now it’s different, you'll see.”

“Can’t it be different with you here?”

“It can, but I am positive you will be better off alone for this night.” he says “We won’t be lost after all, I will be downstairs, you can call me any time.”

“Okay” you tell him “Can I kiss you goodnight?” you ask

“What happened to you? You are too expressive!” he says

“I know, you are not used to it.”

“No, I am used to you being expressive, just not very emotional.”

“Changed state of mind” you say

“I like it.” he says “And to answer your question” he leans in and kisses you deeply “I was going to do it anyways.”

You smile at the gesture “Goodnight Toto.” you say

“Goodnight love.” he replies and he leaves.

You close the door and walk straight to bed where you immediately fall asleep.

The next day you text Sara and she drops by for a morning coffee in your new balcony. As soon as she enters the loft she looks around.

“Wow Horner, did you get any sleep?” she asks

“I actually did.”

“How did you unpack all of those boxes by yourself?”

“I didn’t do it by myself” you tell her

“Omg, who did you invite?”

“No one, a neighbor helped me.”

“Oh, you’ve already met your neighbors? That’s crazy. Are any of them hot?”

“Yeah I met one of them because he wanted to complain about the noise. And yeah, he was hot. In fact for me he is one of the hottest.”

“What happened to Miss Toto Wolff is the hottest man on earth? Did she disappear?”

“No she didn’t, because actually Toto Wolff IS the freaking neighbor.”

“What the hell?” she asks “Girl I need coffee and Monte Carlo air STAT.”

You make her coffee and your tea and go to the balcony where you sit on a big white table.

“Turns out Wolff is my freaking neighbor. He’s living downstairs and he heard the noise during quiet hours so he decided to give me a notice.”

“But when he saw you he forgot what he noticed” she says

“No actually he did make the notice and then we pretty much fought for Marc, ended up having sex, had a nap and then unpacked all of my boxes. We danced together in the living room and then he left because he had to work today.”

“You used the bed for the first time to have make up sex with Wolff?” she asks

“I pretty much did yeah” you tell her

“You are crazier than I thought you were.” she says

“I am crazier than I thought I were” you say

You tell her everything that happened yesterday night as both of you drink your beverages watching the view from your balcony. Later on Sara helps you unpack the last box and your apartment is finally set. The next few days you pass your time by hanging out with Sara and your other best friends who happen to be in Monaco. Toto drops by some days and you two hang out for some hours until one day you finally ask him for a Mercedes project to work on so you can spend your time by being more productive. Days pass and it’s finally Wednesday morning when you are actually packing your clothes for Baku. You take mostly summer clothes even though you won’t be able to wear any of the to the paddock. You also take your extra Mercedes shirts and pants as well as Toto’s Mercedes shirt. You make sure everything is there. After that you call Sara to drop by so that you can say goodbye to her and spend the rest of the day alone at the apartment until Toto knocks the door to let you know that your driver has arrived and is ready to take you to Nice to finally fly to Baku. A car ride and a flight later you and Toto land in Azerbaijan. Both of you wait in the jet until the car is ready to take you from the plane to the hotel. At that time the cockpit door opens and you take a look inside. The pilot who goes out of the cockpit is not Mike. You raise your eyebrow at this and you look at the door more intensely for Toto to notice.

“What are you looking at?” he asks looking up from his phone

“Our pilot.” you say

“What about him, are you not satisfied?” he asks

“No, I am. But the question is, where is Mike?”

“He’s on leave, why?”

“Just wondering”

“Why would you care about him?”

“Because I like him”

“Noted” he says and turns back to his phone without speaking

“Are you jealous Wolff?” you ask

“No”

“Are you sure?”

“End of discussion” he says and you laugh

“Okay sir.” you tell him

After that the crew opens the door and you get off the plane. You already made sure that you have your mask on you so people won’t recognize you. Back to the same old ways. You take a ride to the hotel and you walk straight to your suite in which some other Mercedes employee checked you in before you arrived. Toto goes back to his own suite even though he asked you to hang out with him instead. You settle down in your suite and check Toto's schedule for the weekend

13:30-14:00: Press conference

14:10-14:50: F1 Team Principal Meeting

14:50-16:00: Coffee Break

16:00-17:00: Team Meeting

18:00-20:00: Business meeting

20:30: Dinner

You open your phone and text Toto

You

I’ve been taking a look at your schedule, is everything to your agreement?

Wolff

Yes, all is checked and approved

You

Good to know. By what I'm seeing, it’s going to be a full day. I mean press, team meetings and business meetings

Wolff

Oh is it actually on my schedule?

You

The business meeting? Yeah it’s tabbed in from 18:00 to 20:00. Should I remove it, is it wrong?

Wolff

No, let them believe that I’m busy during that time.I have already planned something. It’s not a business meeting, it is supposed to be a meeting for us two but I told Brad that I will be busy so I guess he thought it was business related

You

Oh, so I am busy from 18:00 to 20:00 too? What are we going to do ?

Wolff

I would let you be curious but we are supposed to go to a boat trip in the Caspian. I’ve chartered a boat for a couple of hours and then we will be having dinner too, so please do not wear high heels.

You

Oh I love boat trips so no high heels

It’s not like I could put heels on though, I will be dressed in the Merc gear all day long

Wolff

Well pack another outfit but still no high heels

You

Okay then. I guess I’ll see you later?

Wolff

Tomorrow

You switch your phone off and fall asleep for a few hours. It’s already early in the morning since you left Nice at night and the flight lasted a long time but thank god you didn’t have to be at the paddock until noon. You wake up at 11 and order some breakfast. You get ready and phone Toto to let him know you are ready. 10 minutes later you are on your way there in his black AMG SUV and you see the fans taking photos of the car. Well it’s Toto they’re taking pictures of since they have no idea about who you actually are. You get out of the car and go to Merc’s hospitality. You wave Toto goodbye and you go to your office while he’s off to his. Later on you hear a knock at your door.

“Who is this?” you ask

“Mindy, it’s Lewis.” you hear a voice

You stand up and put your mask on before opening the door. Better safe than sorry. When you open the door you see that it’s indeed Lewis so you welcome him in. You take off your mask and sit on the little couch

“How is it going?” he asks

“Everything’s good, thank you. How are you?”

“Good. You know how it is. Just running around, trying to keep up with everything.”

“Lewis Hamilton trying to keep up? I am pretty sure everyone is trying to keep up with you, not you with them.”

“Well yeah, when it comes to F1 it’s pretty much how you say it is. But in real life I have so many things to keep up with.”

“I bet you do. Like I am pretty sure you are flying to New York as soon as the race ends.”

“I am. Met Gala.” he says and you laugh

“So you won’t be here for post race celebrations if you win. I guess I should hand the win to George this time, or maybe let Red Bull win.”

“Don’t you dare”

“I won’t Lew, you know you’re my fav. But if you want to secure the win, I need to get in the Met next year.” “Deal.” he says

“Oh god Lewis, I was only joking.”

“I know, but I am pretty sure that I can land you an invitation.”

“We’ll see until next year.” you tell him “Is Roscoes coming to the gala?”

“No, I am actually sending him back to Monaco for the week and then he’ll be with me in Miami.”

“Where is he going to stay in Monaco?”

“At the pet hotel.”

“Why don’t you leave him with me ?”

“In Monaco?” he asks

“I live there now”

“You do? I can leave him with you, of course.”

“If you don’t fully trust me I can ask Toto for his help. We live in the same building.” “I have so many questions about this but I have to go. It’s gym time.” he says

“We can figure out the logistics about Roscoe later. Have a good session Lewis.” you tell him before he leaves the office

For the next hour or so you hang out in your office all alone and when it is time you leave the hospitality center to accompany him to the press conference. Just when you are outside the press conference center you see Christian and by his side a really familiar face that you cannot remember. You take another look at her while Toto stops dead in his tracks.

“What?” you ask him and he looks confused. You take a look for a third time. You see a familiar girl dressed in Red Bull gear talking to Christian. It’s then when it clicks. The girl is Cynthia. Cynthia Jones dressed in Red Bull speaking to Christian. What the heck is this about? You can feel the anger rising to your chest

“Breathe” you hear him say

“That’s too far” you tell him

“It’s crazy.” he says “Go talk to her, find out what this is all about.”

“I will" you say

“Just be careful not to reveal too many things"

“Of course"

Toto glances at his watch. 12:55

“I should get going, press is starting in 5"

“Okay, I'll see you later" you tell him and he nods “Do you wanna meet here?"

“I’ll be straight off to the TP meeting. I will see you during the coffee break, okay?”

“Okay”

“Try to find out what Cynthia is doing here.” he says

“I will” you tell him and you smile

“And if you are too angry about what you find out, I have some files you can take a look at while you’re waiting.”

“Okay” you say and you leave him. You spot Cynthia hanging out outside the press center and you decide to approach her

“Hello.” you tell her

“Hi” she replies and smiles “Oh, you’re Mindy right? The girl who gave us the Mercedes tour in Jeddah?”

“Yup, that’s me.” maybe not “What are you doing here?” you ask her

“I landed a job in Red Bull Racing. Isn’t it crazy?” she says

“Oh definitely. You went from visiting the paddock to actually working here, congrats!” you try to play excited when you are actually fuming

“It was meant to be. I landed the job when I was visiting the paddock in Jeddah.”

“How come?”

“Christian Horner met us at the paddock club and he asked what we were doing. Once I told him about my studies in management he asked to see me in person and then he proposed this job.”

“What’s your position?”

“For what I’ve understood, I am currently sort of replacing Christian’s daughter while I am also acting like his PA.”

“Oh so management?”

“It’s still too early for that title and I definitely don’t have that much freedom as an executive does. I am thinking it more like an internship in management while also being a personal assistant to Christian.”

“Oh Christian” you say and you roll your eyes

“He’s not as bad as everyone thinks he is.” she says “He might actually be better than Toto”

“Yeah, nah” you tell her “Toto is actually definitely more human-ish than Christian.”

“And how would you know? Have you ever worked with Christian?” she asks jokingly. If only she knew

“No but judging from the paddock rumors he seems to be a tough one to handle.”

“Absolutely not. He is really kind and funny. Really chill type. He made me call him by his name since day 1. It’s really like we’re friends.”

“That’s really good for you.” you say

“What about Toto?” she asks. As if she would let it go

“Mr. Wolff is really nice.”

“You’re not calling him Toto?”

“No, he prefers to keep things professional. He’s more into being formal and things.”

“Must be boring” she says

“It’s pretty good for now and I’m always guessing, familiarity might be a little too much at some point.”

“Christian has been saying this about his daughter.”

“He has?” you ask slightly nervously

“Yeah, he said that working with family might be a little too overwhelming at some point.”

“Well he’s kinda right. Did he say why she left?”

“From what I’ve taken they decided that she should take a break and she’s currently hanging out in Monaco in her new apartment. He’s thinking of taking her back by the Monaco Grand Prix but he’s not sure yet.” she tells you

“Oh, well. Whatever suits them best.”

“Yeah, we are not the ones to judge.”

“Definitely not.”

“It was really fun talking to you again Mindy. We should hang out sometime.”

“Yeah definitely.” It’s not like you slept with the man I am sleeping with. you think

You wave at her and leave the press center to wait until Toto finishes his morning tasks. You open the F1TV stream and watch his interview. When Will starts asking a question to Franz Tost you decide to text Toto about your findings.

You

Turns out Cynthia Jones is staying in my life for good cause apparently Christian hired her in my position during the Saudi GP. And I wasn’t even out of the team for a week

You see him holding his phone and taking a glance at it while Franz is speaking. He rolls his eyes and puts the phone back in his pocket. You stay once again in your office, going through Toto’s schedule for the weekend and looking at your socials. Some time later your phone rings

Wolff

She’s going to make our lives hard but it's very typical of Christian to hire someone from the first day that you left

You

She even proposed that we should hang out

Wolff

If only she knew

You

That’s what I said

Wolff

She was waiting outside the press center for Christian and now they’re both in front of me walking to the TP meeting. She’s talking and Christian is laughing like he’s having the time of his life

You

I figured she’s that type of assistant cause according to her she and Christian are practically besties now. It’s going to be a good one when I get back to rb

Wolff

Remind me to mount a secret mic and camera on you when that happens cause I want to see the Horner-Jones fight.

You

I bet you she’s going to regret the day she agreed to that position

Wolff

Whoa, too aggressive. How about checking some data before the coffee break cause rumor has it that you love reading data and commenting on them

You

Anything to get her off my mind and anything for you Mr. Wolff

Wolff

I’m flattered. There’s a file in your email waiting for your comments and questions. Bet Bono is going to be thrilled. I am off to the meeting, see you soon.

After Toto’s messages you check your email to take a look at the file he sent you. It’s full of data and details about this year’s rocketship. It is then when it hits you. The data are from the simulator and the track they’ve been using is Barcelona. In Red Bull you always used to run simulations in Barcelona so you have the exact same data from your ex team. You open them and start comparing them and finding where Mercedes lacks compared to Red Bull. You also open Adrian’s and GP’s essays on car performances and start noting any questions or things you’ve noticed. You really hope Toto will actually use them in his meeting with Bono and James. However, you keep all of the comparisons to yourself. You are not sure Toto is in favor of cheating so you will probably announce it to him later during the coffee break. You make a new file and email it to his account. Later on you hear a knock on your door.

“It’s Toto” you can hear him say and you unlock the door for him to enter.

“Hey.” you say

“Hi, how are you feeling?” he asks

“I am good. I read all the data and I relaxed so much.”

“Well, I, on the other hand, almost had a fight with Christian.”

“Why?” you ask

“Because he was being a douchebag.”

“Nah, he was just being Christian” you tell him and he laughs

“Was the data any good?”

“Yeah, I also emailed you my questions and stuff.”

“Oh, I will be forwarding them to James and Bono.”

“Speaking of the data, I saw they were sim data from Barcelona.”

“We use Barcelona almost every time for our simulations.”

“Well, it turns out, Red Bull does too.” you tell him and he looks at you, suggests to keep talking “I have the comparisons fully made here. There’s also an excel file with all the lacks and the sections Red Bull might present an advantage.”

“This is interesting.”

“I know Toto. But the thing is, I didn’t email those to you because I didn’t know if you wanted to have access to all that information.”

“I totally get it.”

“You should understand that this is confidential, but if you decide you want it, it will be in your inbox right away.”

“This file can affect the whole development path for us.” he says

“I know, that’s why I kept it.”

“You should keep it for yourself.”

“I swear I won’t give this to Red Bull.”

“I trust that you won’t” he says

“I will always have it at hand if you want to use it though. Anything for Mr. Wolff” you say and both of you laugh

“Thank you.” he says “Do you want some coffee and a snack? It’s coffee break after all.”

“No, thank you. You can leave this tiny office and enjoy your coffee in your office. I feel bad for keeping you here.”

“I am only hanging out here because I want to.” he says “But I’ll leave you alone. We’ll have enough time tonight.”

“Of course.” you smile at him

“Meet you after the team meeting ?”

“I will be waiting.”

Once Toto leaves for his coffee break and the team meeting later you decide to go out and see the track. There are some bikes available at the hospitality center so you grab one and ride at the track of Baku. You see other people doing the same thing, some of the drivers are also doing their track walks. At some point you spot Max. It’s been a while since you talked considering the fact that you didn’t even see him in Jeddah but you kept texting during that time. When you spot him it is in your impulse that you almost yell at him to go and talk to him. When you remember that you are actually supposed to be an unbothered Mercedes employee you change your mind, and as you are caught up in your thoughts you almost lose your balance. Thankfully you save it before you find yourself in the ground or the barriers and you keep your direction and finish your lap. 6 km later you are back in your office, thankfully not sweaty since you took your time to circle the track, and you also have a cup of tea and a chocolate bun as a snack. You take a bite as you see today’s headlines from the Media day and you also take a look at some market news. After a while Toto texts again

Wolff

Just finished asking all of your questions to the mechanics and they were impressed to say the least because they managed to assess some really important things for the race

You

Next time I should be present in those meetings

Wolff

I will personally make sure of it. We will be done in 25, I’ll pick you up. Don’t be late

Those 25 minutes pass by quite fast and you don't realize until Toto is knocking at your door. Thankfully you packed your stuff earlier so Toto cannot complain about you being late.

“I am impressed.”

“I didn’t actually understand how fast the time passed. Thank god I had my things packed.”

“That’s why I texted you earlier.” he says

“Yeah but you cannot complain now.” you reply

“No, the truth is I cannot.”

“Are we going straight to the boat?” you ask

“Yes, that’s why I told you to pack another outfit. Tell me you didn’t forget”

“I did not”

“Good. Now get your stuff, we are leaving.” After that both of you leave the track and go to the boat Toto has chartered for a couple of hours. He helps you hop on the boat and he does the same

“Are you going to drive this?” you ask

“Are you scared?”

“It depends on whether you are driving this thing or not”

“I am driving”

“Are you allowed to do this?”

“You are shitting yourself” he laughs

“Yeah because if we drown, imagine the headlines people will write.”

“We’ll be the next Rose and Jack.” he says

“Yeah, almost.”

“Just so you know, I am fully capable of navigating the boat.”

“For real?”

“I have a sailing license.”

“Is there anything you can’t do ?”

“Think straight when you’re with me.”

“Very funny.”

“It’s true.” he says and you take a look around and see people walking up and down the harbor “What about finally leaving? We’re going to miss the sunset if we take any longer.”

“Let’s go” he sails and he undocks the boat.

The two of you sail in the Caspian leaving the Baku port behind you. Toto is making sure that everything he does is safe, occasionally checking on the radar to see whether there are other boats in close proximity. You sit by his side and snap a couple of pictures of him while he’s driving the boat. He looks absolutely stunning. It’s already late afternoon, 19:00-ish and the sky is starting to get sweeter, indicative of the sunset later on. When you are finally out of the waters in a space that is far enough from the shore but close enough so you can distinguish the structures of the city, Toto drops the anchor and stops the boat there. “That’s quite a nice view.” you say

“I figured you would like it” he says and comes to your side

“You can actually see the whole city from here.”

“I figured that since we are not able to see the city together on foot, maybe this is the second best option.”

“It is. Although I would have loved a nice walk and a tour of the old city.”

“I would have loved that too.” he says as you keep looking at the city behind you and puts his hand on your lower back.

“This right here, is the Maiden Tower," Toto points at a tower and your gaze follows his finger

“Legend has it that a young princess jumped from the top and ended her life because her father wouldn’t accept the man she loved."

“Hope I won’t end up this way.”

“God, I hope not.” he laughs and you shift your gaze to the two largest towers in the scenery

“The flame towers.”

“I know them Toto, I’ve been coming to Baku for a while.”

“Let me give you a tour, Horner. Don’t be shit.” he says and you smile

“Go on then.”

“The flame towers were finished in 2012. The building is a little less than 200 meters and it has a double purpose. In the first tower there are a lot of offices and apartments and in the second tower there’s a hotel.”

“What are they supposed to mean?”

“They are meant to symbolize the eternal spirit of Azerbaijan and the country's enduring strength and resilience. Plus the whole flame design idea came from an Ancient Azerbaijani tradition of fire worshiping.”

“I love them, they look so pretty.”

“And right beside there’s the crystal hall.”

“Never heard of it” you say

“Eurovision was hosted there in 2012.”

“Wait, how do you know, are you a fan ?” you ask him

“No, I hate Eurovision.”

“What?!” you say surprised. “You’re European, you cannot hate eurovision.”

“I can, and I do.”

“But why?”

“Because it’s kitsch”

“It’s not kitsch, it’s camp, everyone loves camp.”

“It’s kitsch and I hate it, move on.” he says

“I cannot wait for the day that I will make you watch it.”

“I’d rather Christian find out about us.”

“That’s a bold one” you tell him

“Last but not least, the fortress.” he says ignoring you and points to it

“I’ve seen the fortress, I took a ride at the track today.”

“How did you like it?”

“It’s so pretty, but it’s prettier from the sea. And much more interesting when you talk to me about it.”

“Hm” he says and he puts an arm around you

“How did you learn all those things?” you ask

“I read a lot, even if I don’t have time to see the sights, I like to read about them, get to know the story of the city that I am in.”

“That’s fair. I was wondering because I’ve been here like five times and I’ve never gotten past the name of each sight here.”

“That’s good because you can for once, not talk and let me show you around.”

“You’re the best tour guide I’ve ever had.” you smile at him and you leave a kiss on his cheek.

During the next hour you stay on the boat in the Caspian and see the sun set on the horizon. You take a look at the flame towers which reflect the orange and pink lights of the sunset. You snap some pictures of the scenery as well as Toto who is sitting carelessly in the boat with his white linen shirt and his sunglasses on. He also snaps some pictures of you from both yours and his phone and you also take some selfies. You immediately set the best picture of him as his contact picture and once you are done with the whole photo thing you get back to where Toto is currently sitting and relax with him for a little while longer. You two soak in the views without talking much.��As it starts to get darker Toto drives the boat back to the harbor where you dock and leave to get to the hotel. Both you and Toto enter the elevator to get to your suites

“You’re coming over for dinner right?” he asks

“Well, I was thinking of getting some sleep for tomorrow.”

“Come on, I’ve already asked roomservice to have our table set.”

“Now I can’t say no.” you tell him and smile at him. When the elevator gets to your floor you walk out and follow him to the door of his suite. You enter first and he follows and the smell of food hits your senses.

“It smells fantastic.” you say

“It’s traditional Azerbaijani cuisine.”

“I love it. We should have tried the Saudi Arabian foods as well.”

“Well, nothing can go wrong with Italian.” he says

“Then why didn’t we order Italian” you tease him

“Because I wanted to immerse myself in the Azerbaijani culture today.”

“Is it a part of the guided tour?”

“Well, couldn’t it be?” he says “Since I’ve already given you a sight tour, I am ready to give you a culinary tour as well” he tells you as he pulls the chair off the table so that you can take your seat

“Thank you.” you tell him and you sit down as he walks back to his side of the table and sits down

“This is called Dolma.” he says as he leaves one of them on your plate “It is grape leaves with a filling of minced lamb with rice and some herbs.”

“Interesting” you say as you take a look at the plates on the table “Oh god, is this kebab?”

“You know kebab?” he asks

“Literally everyone knows what kebab is Toto, it’s not a secret. It’s actually one of my favorite street foods.”

“It is really good.” he tells you as he grabs a bite of it “You should also try out the pilaf”

You take a look at it “What is this?”

“It’s something like a risotto I guess”

“I thought you knew the exact recipe of every single plate” you tease him

“Apparently I don’t, I just took a look at the menu and chose what I thought was best.”

“Everything looks delicious though.” you tell him

“Wait until Miami. We’re going to eat some great burgers there.”

“Speaking of which, I am not sure that I will be in Miami”

“Why ?”

“Because it was cringe enough last year, I won’t submit myself to that whole cringe fest again.”

“You will be coming.”

“Says who?”

“Me” he replies and you sit there taking another bite of your amazing food, slightly annoyed . When he realizes that what he said made you angry he talks again. “Look, it is really important that you should be there. It is supposed to be your home race, we’ve told everyone that you are American, if you are only staying for a few more races it will be weird if you are not present for the only time you will get to go to a race in your country with the team.”

“No one will remember Toto.”

“People will remember. We have a list of each race in which we note whose home race it is. And by what I’ve seen you are already on the list.”

“I didn’t write my name anywhere.”

“I am pretty sure Bradley did. He probably remembers that you are American and just added you in.”

“And what about the home race list?”

“We are kind of celebrating it by giving them less time to work during the weekend, or allowing them to bring their families in.”

“That’s so sweet though.” you say

“I mean, people are important to us, they are not just workers, they are our companions.”

“I hate this team” you say and you see Toto lifting one eyebrow at you “I mean, I hate how much I already love it. How am I supposed to go back to Red Bull?”

“You can just stay in Mercedes.”

“And say what to Christian?”

“Tell him that his team is shit, his management is also shit and that you cannot grow in that shitty environment.”

“He’ll find out that you told me to say that and then you will find yourself on the cover of Corriere dello Sport.”

“Won’t be the first time.” he laughs “ Jokes aside, would you ever consider leaving Red Bull?”

“Now I certainly do. I mean, I hadn’t seen anything aside from how Red Bull worked as a team and the race weekend at Saudi was eye opening.”

“Is that a yes?”

“I am already considering it, yes.”

“Will be nice to have you here one day, without hiding I mean.”

“I wasn’t talking about Mercedes. I am considering an offer at Ferrari.” you tell him jokingly and he almost chokes at his wine

“Where?”

“Ferrari. It’s a really great team with a great legacy.”

“Ask them for a paddock pass for tomorrow then.” he says and you burst out laughing

“I am only joking.” you tell him “I would consider it if I had an offer from another team though.”

“We will always have a position available for you if you ever decide to leave that shithole.”

“I’ll tell you when this happens.”

“There’s a when, not an if, that’s good.”

“I know what’s best for me and I am slowly convincing myself it’s not Red Bull”

“Good.” he says and you two keep eating until you hear someone knocking on his door .

“I’ll be right back” Toto tells you and answers the door. You can hear him talking with someone, his voice is quite familiar.

“Shov?What are you doing here?”

“Do you have some time to see tomorrow’s practice program?” you can hear him say

“Um, I am actually a little busy.”

“It will only take a second, you should only check and approve it.”

“I fully trust you Andrew, I approve of it.”

“Good.” he says and he almost leaves “Are you having dinner with someone?”

“Yes, with Lewis, we are discussing contract extensions.”

“Has he been here a long time?”

“An hour or so.” Toto tells him

“That’s funny, because 20 minutes earlier I was at the gym with Lewis.”

“Um…”

“It’s okay Wolff, I hope you are having a good time with whomever you are hanging out with right now” he says and laughs “Hello unknown person who is having dinner with Toto.” You hold your laugh until Toto says goodnight to him and he leaves the room. When you see Toto entering the room with his ‘I fucked up’ face, you burst out laughing and he joins you seconds later. “I hope he was not angry” you tell him

“No he wasn’t angry, I am pretty sure he was thrilled about the whole thing. He’s been trying to get me someone to hang out with for ages.”

“You are good mates huh?”

“He’s one of my closest friends, yes.”

“And he still asks for your approval for the program he wants the team to follow tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I’ve told him millions of times that it’s not necessary but he insists.”

“That’s so sweet of him.”

“I am only taking a look at it before approving it, it’s not like I pay that much attention, I fully trust him.” he tells you and you keep eating

“When are we leaving for Miami?” you ask

“We? I thought you weren’t coming.”

“I am, I also have to bring Roscoe with me, I promised Lewis that I will take care of him from Sunday till we get to Miami so that he doesn’t have to while he’s in New York for the Met.”

“You promised Lewis that you will carry Roscoe all the way from Monaco to Miami?”

“That we will carry him, yes.”

“How did I get involved in this? I don’t remember having any conversation about a dog.”

“I told him that I would take care of him and then I promised that you will help me since you’re now my neighbor. I figured you would know him a little better than I do. I mean Lewis brings him to the paddock almost every week.”

“And have you ever seen me with a dog in the paddock?” he asks

“No, but I thought you had a good relationship with him.”

“Me and Roscoe’s relationship is nonexistent, Horner.”

“Oh god, tell me you are afraid of Roscoes” you make fun of him

“I am thinking of leaving Nice on Thursday morning.” he says

“You are changing the subject.”

“I am not, you asked me when I plan on leaving for Miami and I answered.”

“Thursday huh? What about Media day?”

“I’ll have Shov or either one of the two James to do it and we will be present for the Free practice.”

“Cool.” you tell him

For the rest of the night you hang out together until you decide to leave.

“Will we be going to the paddock together?”

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow morning.”

“What’s the schedule for tomorrow? Hold up, let me check.” you tell him and grab your phone out of your pocket to take a look. “Oh you have a business meeting after FP1 which is supposed to last almost until the start of FP2. James is set to do the press.”

“I don’t remember having any business meetings. Who is it with?”

You take a look at your phone reading the name which catches you completely off guard. You blink twice and take another look at it, still the same name. “Who planned this?” you ask

“I don’t know, I don’t remember planning anything for Saturday. Maybe Bradley did.”

“This cannot be real.”

“It better not be Cynthia again.”

“Who cares about her right now?”

“Will you tell me who I am meeting tomorrow for whatever reason or am I going to this meeting unprepared?”

“The guy you hated last week, Marc Taylor?”

“Seriously?”

“I am dead serious Toto, his name is here.” you tell him and show him the name on the schedule. “You are supposed to discuss sponsorship. Apparently the Taylor Group is interested in investing in F1”

“This is going to be a hell of a meeting.”

“This is going to be a disaster.”

“Funny that both of the people from our past keep appearing in our ways.”

“It’s not funny, it’s shit. Toto, promise me you will handle it gracefully.”

“Dear, I have nothing to be afraid of. You’ve proven to me who you’re always thinking of. It’s pure business. If he wants to invest and it favors the team then we shall cooperate.”

You take a deep breath “That’s too much information and it’s already getting late. I am guessing I should get going.”

“Won’t you stay for the night?”

“Nah, it’s quite early in the race weekend and I want you to focus tomorrow. Both for the testing sessions and the Marc thing.”

“Okay, see you tomorrow?”

“I am actually thinking that maybe I should skip FP1 since Marc will be around, I don’t want him finding out who I am.”

“Smart idea.”

“I am going to drive myself to the track and meet you for FP2”

“Brunch at the track?” he asks

“Oh definitely.” you tell him and you kiss him goodbye as you go back to your suite. You don’t have anything to do so you decide to check your emails before going to sleep. You see a new message popping up the list From: Netflix, DTS

Miss Horner, we would like to schedule our next shooting with you for the newest season. Please let us know if and when you are available to be present at the track where the interviews take place.Kind Regards, The DTS Producers

You shrug and decide to answer From: Ms. Horner

Hello and thank you for contacting me, I am currently taking some time off the team and I am not aware of which race weekend I will be back in the paddock. I will however be happy to inform you as soon as I find out about my whereabouts within Red Bull. Regards, Miss Horner

You set your alarm at the same time Toto’s and Marc’s meeting is supposed to take place and then switch off your mobile and fall asleep. The next morning you wake up just in time to actually take a shower and get ready to go back to the track. You arrive there just in time for FP2. Everyone’s already in the garage so you decide to go there directly. As always, you see Toto sitting at the top of the fantasy island watching over the two garages. “Hello Mr. Wolff.”

“Oh, you’re here!” he says

“How did your meeting with Marco Barco go ?” you say and as soon as the words get out of your mouth you see Marc Taylor himself walking next to Toto with his headset on “How did you just call me?” he asks and you freeze, mainly because no one calls him like this except from you, the Horner you, not the Mindy Rosevelt you. “How did I call you?”

“Did you call me Marco Barco?” he says and Toto looks at the both of you slightly confused

“I called you Marc. Just Marc.” you tell him

“Alright.” “Mindy, this is Marc Taylor, he’s the owner of our newest sponsor. We closed the deal earlier during our meeting.”

“Mr. Taylor, I am so glad that we will have you around more from now on.”

“So am I, I am glad that I actually decided to go for my instinct and invest something in F1.”

“Absolutely.”

A short minute after he asks

“Why are you still wearing a mask? Isn’t it bothering you?”

“Oh no no, it does not. I am actually wearing it because I don’t want to catch any colds and lose my internship days.”

“I see. And where are you from? Mindy right?” By the questions he asks you are already sure that he is suspecting something

“Yes, I am from Boston, US and I ended up here as an intern from Daimler US.” you say and he answers “That’s really cool.” For the rest of the time you don’t interact, Toto isn’t involving in any of your talks and you know it’s because he fears that he’ll fuck this up more if he does. However, he still speaks to you and Marc separately and when he’s talking to Marc he shows off a little more confidence and certainty. It’s like he knows that he’s better than him, which he actually is and you’ve made it clear both that night in Monaco and yesterday after your dinner. The session finishes with the two red bulls on top, followed by the two Mercedes. “P3 and 4 isn’t bad but it’s not P1 and P2 either. I know we’re running similar engine mappings and we still need to be on top.” Toto says in his message to the mechanics.“I am sure we will be there by tomorrow.” you tell him “I should go grab some food because I haven’t eaten yet. I am sure I will see you around Mr. Taylor.”

“I believe so.”

“Marc and I are going to talk a little more and he’ll be off in a while. Talk to you later?” Toto says and winks on you while Marc is on his phone “Of course Mr Wolff. See you later.” you tell him and get back at the hospitality center where you get some food which you take to Toto’s office. You unlock the door with the set of keys he has given you and you set your tray at the table beside his office. You lock the door as you stay inside in order to surprise him. After some time you can hear footsteps approaching and the door handle moves but the door doesn’t open“Oh it is locked.” you can hear Toto say and the next thing you can hear is his keys on the lock. He opens the door and just as he enters the office you speak “I thought we should have brunch together.” The man who enters the room stops dead in his tracks. Of fucking course it’s Marc, followed by Toto who is gesturing something to someone in the hallway. Toto stops and looks at you. Marc speaks first “Horner, what are you doing there?” he asks “Shush Taylor, they’re going to hear you.”

“Why are you sitting in Toto’s office dressed in Merc gear?”

“Ummm” you say and you pause to think “F1 made us have team principal meetings like this in order to boost our relationship” you tell him, not a good excuse. In fact it’s a terrible excuse. “What kind of bullshit do you think you’re selling to me?” Marc asks. Toto is just behind him shaking his head “There’s no point in trying to lie to him.”

“Isn’t there?” you ask and at the same time Marc is taking a look at you. “You’re Mindy? I figured something was wrong here.”

“Look, I need you to shut your mouth about this. No one can know.”

“Why are you here in the first place?” he asks “Christian shut her out of the team for an unknown period of time and she wanted to have access to the paddock without paying herself.” Toto says. “Why didn’t you ask Franz to take you in his team for a while?”

“Because I didn’t want Christian involved in anything.”

“So you two guys had a fight? And what about Mercedes Toto, how is the team going to be safe with all of this.”

Toto tries to explain the situation to Marc “She has already signed NDAs about the team, and I wouldn’t even take her in if i didn’t trust her.” You take a deep breath and Toto understands the position you are in so he decides to leave you and Marc alone for a second “Should I go fetch us something to drink?”

“Yes please.” you tell him

“Why did you end up out of the team in the first place?”

“I was late to a business meeting. You know how Christian is with them.”

“And he threw you out. How long has this been going on ?”

“Not long ago, the GP in Jeddah was my first one with Merc.” you say. Marc stays quiet for a while and his eyes spark with realization a minute or two later. “Oh god, it’s him, isn’t he?”

“What?” you ask him. “The guy you’re heads over heels with? The situationship man! That’s why he’s the one you turned to for the paddock access and that’s why he gave it to you. You two are dating right?”

“Well yeah, it is him but I told you before, no one can know okay?”

“Of course. How long have you been together?”

“We are not together yet, we are just spending time.”

“Yeah right and he took you in his team because he’s just spending time with you.” he tells you and you laugh “I might not know him for a long time but I can tell who I am making deals with. He’s a very direct guy.”

“I know he is.”

“If it’s not me, he’s the next best option.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying since this has been happening.”

“I am happy for you, really.”

“Thank you Marc.” you tell him. Later on Toto comes back with your drinks and the three of you discuss for sometime. Later on and only after you’ve completed your duties for the day you wave Toto and Marc goodbye and go back to your hotel. You sit in your room, have an extra long video call with Sara in which you tell her everything about today and all the days you’ve been missing from Monaco and she texts you a photo from her balcony in Monaco which you post in your official instagram story in order to make everyone believe that you are actually there and not in Azerbaijan. You watch a bunch of drive to survive episodes to prepare for your upcoming interviews and then take a long relaxing shower. Before you even realize it is time for dinner and just as you were thinking of it you get a text

Wolff

Are you coming over for dinner?

You

Nah, I am actually thinking that maybe I should get some rest before tomorrow. I will be ordering something here instead

Wolff

Okay. I hope you are alright

You

Yes, all good but I would like to be excluded from tomorrow’s practice session. Only if I am not needed that is

Wolff

You are always needed but you are always working hard and think you deserve to have the session off

You

Thank you Toto, I won’t forget that ;)

Wolff

I hope you won’t

After your chat with Toto you decide to order some dinner in your room and after that you spend some time on your socials before going to bed. The next day you wake up early as you hear someone knocking at your door. Well, it’s not just someone, in fact, it is Lewis who is at your door and right by his side is his best friend, Roscoe. You were expecting them since Lewis told you he would bring Roscoe over to your suite before hitting the track for FP3 and now you are supposed to take care of him and bring him back to the paddock just before qualifying, when Angela will take over from you. “Good Morning. Were you sleeping?”

“I was yeah but I was planning to wake up either way.”

“This is my good boy Roscoe” he says and he kneels and pats his back “Good boy” he says. “He is adorable.” you tell him and you also kneel to pet him. “He might be a little shy at first, he just wants a lot of cuddling and playing. I am sure he will love you though.”

“I hope he will, we will have to spend some time together before Miami.”

“Toto mentioned that you didn’t want to come, did you decide otherwise?”

“I did yeah, we are planning to come on Friday so Roscoe will be there by then. When are you flying from New York?”

“Thursday morning, I have media duties, I am not like you.” he laughs

“Well, I am not going to the Met either so I guess we are even.”

“Yeah right. Am I going to see you at qualifying?”

“Of course, I plan on coming, I will bring Roscoe to you later.”

“Good, see you then I guess.”

“Bye Lewis.” you say as you wave him goodbye. Roscoe and you enter your suite and you can see him running in his tiny feet trying to take in the space around him. You decide to take a shower but you leave the door open and as soon as you come out of the tub you find Roscoe sitting there waiting for you. For the rest of the time you play with his favorite toy that Lewis left you and he lies on your side as you take a look at the morning news. When the time comes, you get ready and hit the track once again but this time with Roscoe Hamilton on your side. You can see photographers taking pictures of you but you remain completely calm as your face mask and your hair hide your real identity and enter the Mercedes hospitality. You drop Roscoe off to Lewis’ suite where Angela takes over, and text Toto who you can clearly see from the garage that you’re currently sitting in. Toto is just outside making statements to broadcasting channels and companies ahead of qualifying and you are sitting there on the right side of his chair waiting for him to come back as soon as the broadcast of qualifying begins. The session is pretty good for the team, meaning Mercedes and the drivers manage to get P2 and P3. Max is sitting in P1 for tomorrow’s start, a brilliant lap from him you think. “2nd and 3rd are pretty good positions.” Toto says. “The only thing that scares me is Max in P1.”

“We’ve got him, the setup for the race will be even better, Mick has been running the data from the analysis the engineers made based on your comments on the simulator and we’ve seen impressive lap times. We’ll get this for sure.”

“I never doubted their skills, I am sure they can even make the Williams work.”

“They are not doing miracles, they are just engineers.” Toto says and you laugh “They had some good guidance, we wouldn’t have found the exact setup if it wasn’t for you.”

“It’s just Saturday though. We will see tomorrow.”

“You’re right.” he tells you “About tonight, you don’t have any plans right?”

“Except for laying in bed as soon as I get back and ordering dinner I don’t plan on doing anything else.”

“Dinner and movie then?” he asks and you nod “Hitting the track together ?” you ask and he blinks a couple of times. “How come?”

“Well, won’t I be sleeping in your suite tonight?”

“I am surprised that you’re even proposing that.”

“Well if you don’t want to, I have plenty of space in my suite, I will be sleeping all alone again.”

“Okay, dinner and sleepover in my suite for tonight.”

“Will you be doing press?” you ask.“Only for an hour or so, after that I need you with me in the post qualifying meeting with the mechanics.” he tells you. “Where?” you ask surprised. “I need someone to write some notes down for me during that meeting so I figured you would want to join.”

“But-” you hesitate and he interrupts you before you can finish up your sentence “I don’t have any issue with you, I fully trust you.”

“I know, you’ve been quite vocal about it.”

“Well, best believe it. Also, you won’t be there just for note taking, you can partake to the whole meeting with your points or ideas”

“You cannot be serious.” you tell him. “I am as serious as it gets Horner. Wait for me outside your office in an hour.” Toto says as he waves at you and disappears from your sight. After an hour you find him outside your office. Both of you attend the post-quali meeting where you participate with a lot of questions about the performance of the car. At some point you also hear praise from Bono about the setup that you proposed. Well, he didn’t exactly give credit to you, since for him it’s nowhere near your job to give mechanical input about a car set up but he did say that whoever came up with the insights on the setup was a great help. The car was flying compared to the free practice yesterday. It turns out that you actually helped them and you now, more than ever, feel a part of a team that embraces you even if it isn’t directly said to your face. As soon as the meeting is done you and Toto go back to the hotel, wasting no time in the paddock. You get directly back to Toto’s suite where food is already served. The both of you eat and then you relax for a while on the couch

“I am so exhausted from today.” you tell him

“Do you want to sleep?” he asks

“How about we watch a movie?”

“You are going to sleep in the first 5 minutes”

“I promise you I won’t” you tell him “Not if the movie is good anyways”

“How about La La Land?” he asks and you look at him and burst into laughter. “You want to watch La La Land? Are you serious?”

“I just happen to know that you love it.”

“Yeah but do you actually like it?” you ask. Toto clears his voice“Um, I haven’t watched it.” and you answer surprised “You cannot be serious.”

“I am. Whether you believe it or not, I don't watch such movies. Or any movies at all.”

“You are traveling 300 days out of 365 and you don’t watch movies? What do you do on the plane?”

“Read the news, sleep. It’s not that I don’t watch movies, it’s just that it is not on a regular basis.”

“I will make you a cinema fan, I swear. La La Land was game changing for me. That’s what we are going to watch. I don’t care if you don’t like musicals.” you say and you navigate in the TV menu to find the movie stream “Oh and by the way, if you haven’t watched Mamma Mia yet, I will get my ass off this suite and not talk to you until you watch it.”

“I have watched it and I can say that I actually liked it.”

“Aren’t you ashamed to say it Mr. Perfect Image?” you ask him. “Not to you. You clearly watch that kitsch fest that is Eurovision and love musicals so I am not the one to be ashamed here.” he says. “Hey!” you yell at him.“Just press play Horner.” he says and you follow his instructions. During the whole movie you can see he watches with pure interest, even during the songs which he doesn’t know he seems like he’s having fun. You are doing your part to keep him entertained, singing all the songs since this is probably your 50th rewatch. You make all the fun and smart remarks that you’ve seen on socials from other fans of the movie to keep him engaged. When the movie ends, during the epilogue scene and towards the end you can see him tensing, kind of trying to cover his emotions up. As the credits roll you turn to him. “So? What do we think about one of the most amazing musicals made to this day?”

“The ending” he says and pauses. “The ending what?” you ask him. “The ending was weird. Like it really made you believe that this could work but it actually was the ‘What could have been’ moment. It was kind of brutal.”

“Well, that was the intention. To show that two people had to let go of each other to achieve their dreams. It’s because they loved each other that they decided to do this. Now that I am thinking of it, it kind of is brutal, but it’s realistic. Life is brutal sometimes.”

“Do you analyze every movie that you see like this?”

“Well, yeah? That’s the point of watching a movie, it’s not looking at beautiful pictures for three hours straight and then going to sleep.”

“So you’re really passionate about it then.”

“I am yeah.”

“It’s kind of nice that you find things that you really like and are so passionate about them”

“You can also do it, you know. Being that one guy who’s obsessed with managing a team, finance and racing isn’t all you can ever be. You can have hobbies and other interests. I just think you are scared to break that flawless facade, which is funny because I genuinely believe that you are a man that is full of passion and you want to show it to people. You are afraid that if anyone outside of your safety bubble finds that you are human and not a well programmed robot that performs at its peak day in day out, your life will end. I know you try to be open about things that concern you and people around you, like how you’ve been speaking out about your mental health, but showing your real self can be hard for you but you should really try.” you tell him and he sits there just listening “How about we make this a thing? Movie night, once a week. Or more if you have more recommendations.”

“Am I about to turn you into a cinema noob?”

“Shut up.” he says and checks his watch that is resting on the arm of the couch you are currently sitting on. “How about going to sleep? We have to be at the paddock tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah sure.” you say and both of you walk off to the bedroom where you sleep until Toto’s alarm goes off. “Good Morning.” he says, his voice deeper than usual, with that sleep raspiness standing out “Hello.” you tell him and you can feel him shifting next to you“It’s race day”

“I am aware. I have a really good feeling about today.”

“Hm” he says “Do you sense a win?” he asks and he plants a kiss on your cheek. You could get used to it. “I actually do. I feel like we are going to do well.” and you can almost hear him laughing “Who’s we?” he asks you. “Mercedes?” you tell him and he laughs, content that you actually consider his team yours by now.You lay still on the bed for a few more minutes, sitting in complete silence but you can feel the two of you debating whether or not you should get off the bed. You and Toto are too lazy to do anything but like always he’s the one who takes the initiative and moves. “Come on, get yourself ready. We have to be down at the paddock in 45 minutes.”

“I don’t need 45 minutes.”

“Oh you’re sure about that?” he asks. “Positive. You can time me if you want.” you reply.“Yes?” he asks. “Yea. But I am not going to race myself to get ready without breakfast first.”

“I thought you were smart enough to figure out that we are always having breakfast at the track.” You don’t reply, you just sit and stare outside the window while Toto is using his phone. With his serious voice he says “Hey Siri, call Jasmine.” and then his phone starts dialing. It’s not after a minute that a female voice answers the phone. “Hello Jasmine, this is Toto, can I have my full breakfast order done and served in 45 minutes in my office?” he asks and waits for a few seconds. “I also want two servings of the same order, that in my office too, same time.” he says and you smile at the chat he’s having with his employee. “Also, it is really important that you find Mr Lord and let him know that I will not be available for the next 2 hours and I don’t want any distraction while I am in my office. Yes. Yes. Thank you Jasmine.” he says and he ends the call. “Now that you know breakfast is waiting, go get ready. Now.”

“Is this an order?”

“I am already counting.” he says and you run to get ready.You start running around his suite grabbing all of the things you need for race day as Toto sits on the couch scrolling on his phone while he gives you some glances. 15 minutes later you are ready to go, bag on your shoulder, shoes on. “I’m ready” you say standing and looking at him. “You are quick.” he says, still scrolling. “I am. We could go now, although you are not ready.”

“It won't take more than 5 minutes.”

“Really?” you ask “Yes. I just put my clothes on, get my iPad and my computer in my bag and I’m ready to go.”

“Oh I thought you needed time to get your face ready for cameras.”

“Nope, I’m all natural, the one who needs to get her face ready is you.”

“I didn’t do anything on my face except from washing it and applying some sunscreen. I am 100% natural today.”

“I see. Although you cannot convince me that when you were at Red Bull you took less than 35 minutes to get ready.”

“Well yeah I needed like half an hour to get my hair and make up done. I have to get camera ready every day. I was always late and Christian yelled at me so many times. Now no one sees me so it really doesn’t matter if I look like shit.”

“You don’t look like shit, you are great.” he tells you “Aw thanks.” you say and you drop your bag on the floor and sit next to Toto on the couch and give him a peck on his cheek. He turns and looks at you and kisses you right on the lips, instantly deepening the kiss laying you on the couch. You smile in that kiss and keep going, tangling your fingers on his hair, pulling him closer. He puts his hand under your waist and pulls you closer and you can already feel a burning desire. “How about we get back to bed?” he asks. “We have to go Toto” you manage to say between kisses.“I don’t want to leave.” he says. “We can miss the race to be honest.” you tell him. “Yes we can.” he tells you “But we won’t. Plus you’ve already ordered us your breakfast”

“You’re better.” he says and you scoff when you hear his words. “Oh god, behave Wolff” you tell him and you push him away teasingly. You walk away from him and he sits there, resting his head on the back of the couch trying to calm himself. “You got to get ready now”

“Okay.” he says unwillingly and stands up and starts getting ready. Half an hour later you take the walk from the hotel to the paddock which has already begun getting flooded with people. Both you and Toto take your breakfast at his office and then you follow him around in his pre race routine, from fan zones to debriefs, to interviews and finally to the grid. You spot Christian and Max many times during your time there but Toto doesn’t say anything more than a Hello to both of them. You watch Max get ready to hop in the car in front of both Lewis and George and can’t help but feel a bit of anger that he is sitting on pole. You know Mercedes’ car is fast, it’s more deserving to be in P1 than Max. You know you have to work hard to bring them in P1 and P2, because the Red Bull is not slow either, you know the car from inside out, and you know it’s capable of winning. It’s only a race’s time. When it is time you manage to greet Lewis in a flurry of cameras, fans and engineers at the grid and head back to the Mercedes garage. As you head towards the entrance of the garage you hear your (fake) name being called and you turn to see Cynthia outside the Red Bull garage as she shouts good luck to you and you yell back at her, wishing her good luck. You take your place at the fantasy island and watch the race start. Max launches off perfectly, at the right time and Lewis and George get a little left behind. As the race goes on, Max is still in front of the two Mercedes drivers, who are actually closely following him. You keep watching fully focused on the telemetry screens in front of you, and listening to the talks between team members about pace and strategy. Not long after the race start, you see both cars overtaking the Red Bull and launching off into the distance. The cars are quite quick but Max keeps following them, in DRS range. The rest of the field stays back as the two black and the one blue car fight to get the first place. As soon as it is time for strategy calls you can hear the team agreeing on a double stack for the pit stops, and so it happens, but as it is normal, double stacks can’t always be flawless. George’s stop is perfectly timed and great in duration so that the undercut will be strong enough but on the other hand, Lewis who has been really unlucky with some shitty stops has it again. The front right tire doesn’t come off as quick and the stop lasts a whooping 5.6 seconds, which makes Lewis lose a track position to Max and a whole 2 seconds to him as well. Toto gets so frustrated with the stop that he smashes the desk like he always does and the race continues. Toto is all the time on the radio with the strategists and the mechanics and as a result he has no time to talk to you. Lewis is chasing Max but failing. Max is much quicker than he is and when he does reach him he is not able to make a move on him. The race finishes with George in 1st place, Max in 2nd and Lewis in 3rd. As always Toto reaches and presses the button to congratulate George and you can see the message being broadcasted on TV. George happily replies and celebrates, thanking Toto and the team. And then Toto moves on to congratulate Lewis. Lewis is much less excited than George was. He just thanks Toto and the team and switches his radio off. You realize from the first minute of the broadcast that Lewis is kinda pissed off and disappointed.

“We won” Toto turns and tells you with a smile on his face. “Lewis is disappointed I’m sure. But yeah at least George won.” you tell him. “I know Lewis will be disappointed. We let him down today, he’s not going to be glad. He did everything he could but still the car just couldn’t work to get past Max.”. “I am really hoping he will be alright.”

“It’s Lewis, he’s always bigger than this. A title got stolen from him and he kept on going. I am sure he’s going to come out of this car, go to press and celebrate with us even though he might feel bitter about the third position.”

“Yeah, you probably know him better than I do.” you say and then Toto leaves you in the garage while he’s walking around the paddock talking to journalists, Sky Sports, F1 TV. Later on there’s indeed a celebration with the team for George’s win and Lewis’ podium and everyone gathers there. There’s the usual team picture and then the champagne celebrations which everyone tries to avoid but gets caught up to. After the whole thing winds down you find Lewis sitting outside the garage and you sit with him “Congrats for today!” you tell him trying to cheer him up “Uhh, I don’t know man, this isn’t my best result, but thanks either way.”

“Come on Lewis, you know you did the best you could, and it’s okay, I was in the garage next to Toto and right after that mistake he kept on trying and asking on how you could get past Max and even George but I guess the stars didn’t align for you today but for George.”

“I guess you’re right. I feel like I am overreacting but you know I have to keep my head up, nothing comes out of complaining.” Lewis says. “You just somehow became your own therapist and you overcame the whole thing in like 5 minutes. I hate you.” you tell him laughing. “I’ll teach you how to do it, it seems like you will need it when you leave us.” he says reminding you of your situation in Red Bull. “Definitely” you tell him and you sit there in silence for a while until Toto comes by you. “We’ve got to get going, we only got one and a half hour before the jet leaves”.

“You’re leaving now?” Lewis asks and Toto nods but some mechanic comes to talk to him

“Will Roscoe be joining us?” you ask. “About that, I will be flying with Valtteri and will drop him to Nice before flying to NYC. I was thinking about spending a little more time with Roscoe before dropping him off to you. Is it okay if Valtteri drops him by your place later on?”

“Oh no problem, give him my number so that he can text me once you are in Nice.”

“Great!”

“Lewis I really gotta get going, I have to pack my things back at the hotel before leaving.”

“Of course. I’ll see you in Miami. Take good care of Roscoe.”

“I will” you tell him and you wave him goodbye. After that you leave the track alone since Toto is still busy at the track. You go back to your suite and pack your things and with 45 minutes still left you take your phone and ring Toto. “Are you in your room?” you ask. “No, still at the track.” he says and you reply slightly surprised “Wait, what are you still doing on track?”

“I am having a discussion with Stefano about technical directives and he can’t stop talking.”

“Are you sure you’re going to make it? Are your stuff packed?”

“No they are not, I thought I would have enough time to do it now but he thinks we are having a meeting.”

“Why don’t you tell him that you have to catch your flight?”

“Because he will propose that we fly together” he answers “I keep checking my watch but he doesn’t get the message”

“Oh then try to get out of this discussion asap.”

“Will do. See you in a while” he says and he hangs up. You check your bag and you find Toto’s suite card so you decide to go to his suite and pack his suitcase. You take everything off the closet and start folding them and placing them in his carry on, take his shoes as well as his stuff from the bathroom and place them in the suitcase. Lastly you take all of the chargers and laptops and stuff them into his bag. You take a seat on his couch now both of your suitcases fully packed and ready to go but he’s nowhere to be found. 20 minutes before the time that you have to be in the airport your phone rings and his name pops up on the screen. You accept the call. “Hey” you say. You “We are not going to make it on time. I only just got to the hotel.” he says and you hear footsteps outside his door. “And? We still have 20 minutes.”

“Everything is unpacked. We are going to be late.” he replies and the door opens. He sees you sitting on the couch and ends the call. He walks in the hallway with a confused expression“What are you doing here?” he says and you point at the suitcase and bag left in the middle of the living room area. “I packed.” you tell him and you smile. At this very moment you see a very anxious but happy Toto walking towards you and placing a kiss on your head. “Thank you” he says. “I had time to kill, a spare key card and I figured you might be late so I thought why not. I hope that I packed them in the right way. Oh and make sure that I got everything.”

“It’s perfect, thanks.” he says and he takes a look around the suite, looking for things he might have forgotten. Five minutes later you are ready to go, you leave the hotel, you drive to the airport and get there 10 minutes late but still the jet is ready to go. You board, take the seat opposite to Toto and get as comfortable as you can, he takes a book out of his bag and places it on the table in front of you. You take off from Baku and you start feeling slightly worn out. “Sleepy?” he asks. “Is that so obvious?”

“Yes.”

“It’s just that races wear me out so much. In Red Bull it was easier but now I literally spent twice as much energy because of the whole hiding thing.”

“I get what you mean, I can’t get through it without a cup or two of coffee”

“It is funny because the race is during the afternoon but it still drains me”

“You should sleep.” he tells you. “I won’t.” you tell him and he hums “So, tell me about the technical directives you were discussing with Stefano.” Toto starts explaining what he and Domenicalli were discussing along with some other team principals and you try really hard to follow what he was telling you. You were asking him questions but you felt your eyes burning “I will just close my eyes because they hurt but I will keep listening.” you tell him. “Sure” he says and he laughs. “Hey, I won’t sleep.” and he teases you “I bet you won’t.”. You close your eyes and you follow Toto’s voice, keep asking him questions and discussing until you are less and less conscious and fall completely asleep. Almost 4 hours after, you wake up, feeling the plane descending into lower altitudes. You feel surprisingly warm and open your eyes only to see Toto’s jacket all over you. You slept through the whole flight. You move slightly and Toto, who is sitting just opposite to you reading his book lifts his eyes from the book to you.“Glad to see you didn’t sleep.” he tells you “Hey, don’t make fun of me!”

“I love it when you know you are not right and still try to convince others that you are.” You roll your eyes at his comment and take a look outside the window. “Where are we?”

“Almost in Nice, we will be landing in 20”

“Cool. I can’t wait to sleep in my bed.”

“You’re not coming over?”

“No, I’ve had enough of you during the past days.”

“Right.”

“How’s your book?” you ask. “It is good.” Toto says

“I’ll read it after you.”

“I’ll be happy to lend it to you.”

“Oh and if I like it I will need access to that Wolff Reading List.”

“I don’t have a reading list.”

“Oh god what?”

“It is not a competition Horner, I read for my pleasure.”

“So do I but I have a reading list. I read reviews and I sometimes write them anonymously.”

“Well, I don’t give a shit about reviews, I read the synopsis and if I find it interesting I read it. I am sure some of my favorite books have the shittiest reviews but I don’t care.” he says. “Wow, you are stronger than I am. If a review isn’t good I won’t even start the book.”

“That’s some of the shit people of your generation do”

“Oh yes I keep forgetting that you are a boomer.” you joke “We are not going to discuss this again.” he says in a strict tone “Okay sir.” you mock him. “Fuck off, go back to sleep.” he says and he turns back to his book. “Thanks for the blanket by the way.” you say but he gives you no answer and you laugh. “Are you going to drive me back to Monaco?” you ask. “No you should call Marc” he says. “I hate you Wolff.” you tell him. “I hate you too.” he laughs. A short time after you land in Nice and contrary to what he said earlier, Toto orders for all of your baggage to be loaded to his car. You take the drive back to Monaco while discussing paddock gossip which Toto repeats isn’t a thing he does but he happily participates in the whole discourse. Half an hour later you arrive at home, Toto parks the car in the garage and you get your bags out of the car and take the lift to your apartment. You hug him goodbye and go to your apartment where you instantly unpack and get comfortable and sit in your bedroom where you binge watch gossip girl until it is late enough and Valtteri is calling you to drop Roscoe off. You text him your details and 5 minutes later he’s knocking your door. “Hi Valtteri.” you greet him. “Hi” he says shyly, holding Roscoe’s leash on his one hand and a bag with Roscoe’s food and toys

“Lewis told me to drop those off. Including Roscoe.”

“I will be taking care of him while Lewis is in New York For the Met Gala.”

“Oh yeah, I would take care of him but Tif and I have to go to a bike competition in France”

“Don’t worry, I will take care of him instead. Good to see you, did you have a nice flight?”

“Yes, it was pretty decent, you know how it is when traveling in private.”

“Yeah definitely.” you tell him. “We missed you in F1, when are you coming back?” he says and for a moment you freeze before you register that you supposingly weren’t in Baku this weekend. “I missed you guys too. I don’t know when I am coming back yet, I am still adapting to my new life here in Monaco.”

“You are right, we will be happy to see you back.”

“Thank you for dropping Roscoe off for me”

“You’re welcome.”

“Good luck for your competition.”

“Thanks, goodnight!” Valtteri says and leaves you with Roscoe.

Roscoe gets in and moves around the apartment trying to get used to it. You play a bit with him but at some point you are too tired and get to bed where Roscoe joins you and curls next to your feet and falls asleep. You do the same for the night. The next day you wake up in your new home, register the fact that now you have to take care of Roscoe. You take him out for his morning walk and you go back home where you decide to text Sara once again.

You

I am back in Monaco. Are you up for some coffee?

Sara

Oh welcome back! Of course I am up for coffee. Your place or mine?

You

Cafe de Paris in an hour?

Sara

Omg sounds perfect. Gotta go get ready.

You

I will be bringing Roscoe over too

Sara

God I love this dog. Of course bring him over, the dog is a socialite

You shut your phone and start getting ready, dressing up appropriately for the Cafe de Paris. You feed Roscoe and get him ready and after an hour you are sitting in Cafe de Paris with Sara. You both enjoy your drinks while the bulldog is sitting by your side and you keep gossiping about people you know. Sara spills her work gossip and you keep discussing different bullshit. Time goes by and both of you get hungry so you propose cooking dinner at your place. You and Sara get back home and you start cooking a risotto while she drinks wine and you tell her all the paddock gossip. “So turns out Christian hired that bitch who was hooking up with Toto.”

“He did what?”

“Yeah, he hired her during my first week off the team.”

“Oh my gosh. I might sound a bit harsh but don’t you think that your dad is a bit problematic?” Sara asks “I’ve been thinking that since I officially joined the team, S. I just don’t understand his logic” you say and you hear your phone ringing. When you check you see Christian’s face popping up.“Speak of the devil”.

“Hey dad” you say

“What are you doing?”

“I’m good you?”

“No, I mean, what are you doing outside with Hamilton’s dog?”

“Oh Roscoe? Lewis is flying to the Met Gala and he wants someone to take care of his dog.”

“And you suddenly became best friends with Hamilton that he trusts you with his dog? You have the audacity to walk him in Monaco’s most crowded places? There are pictures all over the internet.”

“I think you are overreacting.” you tell him

“How did the dog end up in your hands? Were you in Baku yesterday?”

“What the fuck dad? I was in Monaco, I had Valtteri drop him off.”

“Are you teaming up with them? Do you think it’s going to make me change my mind and take you back?”

“Look, I have a risotto cooking up on my stove and I do not plan on burning this place down, so let me get it straight for you. I am just taking care of a dog that for some reason triggers you in a way that nothing ever has. I am doing a favor to a friend. Nothing to piss you off. I don’t know why you think everyone is constantly plotting against you but the reality is that we are not. Take a chill pill and get used to seeing pictures of me with Roscoe until Lewis takes him back. And for fuck’s shake, let me live my life.” you say and you turn off the call. “What was that about?” Sara asks. “There are pictures of us and Roscoe from today and Christian was pissed because of a freaking dog.”

“Oh then you were right to speak to him like that”

“Thanks” you say. As soon as the food is ready you and Sara enjoy your lunch at your balcony with a sea view and after a couple of hours she leaves you alone. You clean up the kitchen, do the dishes and get changed to a tracksuit and a pair of sneakers for Roscoe’s night walk. You enjoy a walk along the coast of Monte Carlo and later on you come back to your building. To your surprise you see Toto just outside, dressed in a suit while waiting for his car. “Hi” you tell him. “Hello. Out for a walk I see?” he asks. “Yes, Roscoe needed his night walk.” you say as Roscoe approaches him. Toto instantly takes two steps backwards looking at the bulldog “Where are you off to?” you ask. “I’m going to a business meeting.” you are interested about his day “With a sponsor ?” and he replies giving you all the information you ask for “No, it’s for one of my finance jobs.”

“I see.” you say and you spot someone with a phone pointing to you two “We are being videotaped”

“It’s been a while since we’ve last seen you in the paddock miss Horner” he says “Oh yeah, I’ve been having some time off that’s why.”

“I’ve heard the rumors, met your substitute as well. When do you think you’re coming back ?”

“I haven’t decided yet, I am still recharging to be honest.”

“Good thing to do. Take your time”

“Thank you Mr. Wolff, take care.” you tell him and leave him to go back to your apartment. You take Roscoe off his leash and he slowly walks to his bed where he falls asleep. You lay on your couch and check your socials. It’s the first Monday of May and your timelines have already been flooded with Met Gala content, from the setting of the red carpet to some of the celebrities and acquaintances getting ready for the event. You promised Lewis that you will stay awake to see him on the red carpet and for this reason you decide to take a nap. It’s not that late but since you have to wait for Lewis until later that night you chose to kill some time this way so you drift off to a sweet nap. In the middle of your sleep you hear the doorbell ringing and you walk half asleep to the door where you check through the peephole to see who it is and you see the one tall austrian outside your door dressed with the same clothes as earlier. You open the door and you let him in.“What are you doing here?” you tell him, voice sounding a bit hoarse so Toto gets the hint. “Have you been sleeping? Did I wake you up?” he asks a little worried, “Ummm, you kinda did” you tell him, “Oh sorry, I should go then, let you rest.”

“I was going to wake up anyway. I promised Lewis I will watch him on the red carpet today.” you tell him and he asks “What is it today?”. You laugh with his ignorance “Oh god we are never going to get an invite if you keep asking those questions.”

“Why do we need an invitation for this?”

“It’s one of the most exciting nights of the year Toto, the Met Gala, every relatable celebrity dresses up in custom designer pieces that match to a theme and they have a dinner or something.”

“Prom for rich people?”

“Kinda. I am surprised you aren’t aware of it, since Lewis has been going during the past 3-4 years if I’m not mistaken.”

“Pop culture isn’t my thing.” he says while he takes off his jacket and hangs it on a chair nearby. “I can see it” you reply. Toto joins you on the couch, he sits on the side, takes off his shoes and unbuttons the top button of his shirt. You grab your computer and sit close to him. You open the TV and you play the Vogue Livestream of the event while Toto sits bored next to you switching his gaze from the television to the ceiling, to your laptop, to you and then back to the television. As you are watching the event, Toto stands up and takes a look at your bookshelf and he picks a book which he starts reading while you are too busy waiting for Lewis. Toto speed reads the book as you text Lewis asking him to let you know when he will be joining the red carpet. At some point you distinctively hear Roscoe’s paws on the floor as he runs to the living room. He sits just below your feet which you have laid on the coffee table while Toto is laying on the long side of the couch. Roscoe takes a look at you and then at Toto, both of you too far absorbed to be paying attention to him and for this reason the poor dog decides to make you pay attention to him. Roscoe starts barking and in a fraction of a second, Toto slams his book close and starts backing up and climbing on the back of the couch. When you notice him you burst out laughing. You should have been aware that Toto is afraid of Roscoe, that’s why he was skeptical about having the dog in the same place as him during a transatlantic flight. It seems so hilarious to you that a grown ass man such as Toto is afraid of an old bulldog, mainly because Toto is who he is. The intimidating boss, the scary rival. You immediately grab your phone and start recording. “Lewis, I know you’re in line for the red carpet and you probably won’t see this until tomorrow but you have to see this.” you say as you record yourself and then turn the rear camera on. “I don’t know if you are aware of it but it seems like Mr. Wolff here is afraid of your dog.” you say as you see Toto on the back of the couch and Roscoe staring at him. “Hey! It’s not funny, please get him to leave!” he says and just as he completes his sentence Roscoe continues barking at him, Toto’s expression is essentially pure panic at this point but you continue laughing. You know Roscoe just wants to play with him but he is not very much aware of it. “Please just stop recording and get him out of here” he says again, you are still recording. “He’s not going to hurt you” you tell him, “You don’t know it” Toto replies. “Okay Lew, I have to take care of this, we are still waiting for you here” you say and you show the Vogue Livestream on your TV “Have fun!” you say and you stop recording, sending the video to Lewis. After that you leave your phone down, you grab Roscoe and bring him by your side, far from Toto, who seems like he lost 5 years of his life. The dog lays on the couch as you rub his belly and he seems happy. “See, that’s what he wanted. Just a bit of attention and love.” you tell him “Well, if he wanted that he shouldn't have barked at me. I was scared to death”

“Toto Wolff is afraid of dogs.” you say “I am. You cannot imagine how many times I’ve managed to avoid any interaction with this dog during the past 8 years.”

“I was just wondering how Lewis didn’t have any idea of this.”

“Oh, did you send the video? Did I make a fool of myself on Lewis as well?”

“No, that’s not making a fool of yourself, that’s adorable”

“Until Lewis posts it on his socials”

“He won’t” you say

“You don’t know Lewis, he loves making fun of me every chance he gets”

“I mean sometimes you’re hilarious so he’s right, you shouldn’t be angry.” you tell him

“Most of the time I’m not actually angry, I am just acting like I am to make him feel bad”

“You are crazy” you tell him and you turn to catch a glimpse of the screen when you see Lewis coming up the red carpet. “Oh there he goes!” you say and Toto turns his attention to the screen and so does Roscoe once he realizes that his dad is on the tv. “That’s a daring outfit.” Toto comments as he watches Lewis posing on the red carpet. “Oh you suddenly have an opinion on fashion?”

“Why shouldn’t I? You think you’re the only one with a fashion sense?”

“Darling, at least I have more than 3 outfits in my wardrobe” you tell him and he rolls his eyes. He knows you’re right but he still focuses on the television. You see Roscoe staring at the screen and you snap a photo which you post on your instagram stories right after lewis leaves the red carpet. “Did we just sit here to watch Lewis pose on the red carpet for 3 minutes?”

“No, I am hoping he will be back for an interview shortly after.” you say and he nods, going back to the last page of the book he was reading and 5 minutes later Lewis comes on the screen again and both of you watch the interview ss

“You’re an expert on this aren’t you?” he asks “I have been watching for the past 10 years, Toto. Plus, they do love Lewis a lot, it was almost certain that they would give him the interview.”

“They do seem to have a preference for Lewis though.” he says

“The truth is, as much as Max is supposedly my friend, he’s not that relevant out of our little world.”

“How can you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Hang out with him”

“Look, he isn’t as much of a dick as he seems, he’s actually a pretty decent company and he’s a kind soul but only if you are close to him and that’s why he comes off as an asshole to everyone else.” you say and you yawn. “Sleepy?” he asks

“Yeah, I am starting to get tired. Are you going to stay?”

“I would but Roscoe will be here.”

“He can sleep in the guest room, please stay?”

“I will, although I have a meeting tomorrow morning. I’ll just wake up early.”

“Okay” you tell him and you stand up taking Roscoe in your arms “Wanna pet him?” you ask. “Only because you’re holding him” he says as he pets Roscoe who’s now sleepy. You leave your living room and head towards the guest room where you leave the dog, closing the door behind you. By the time you are out the door you see that the living room is already empty and you head to your room where Toto is already laying in your bed. You change into your pajamas and climb in your bed where you fall asleep. The next day you wake up and as Toto said, he has already left for his meeting. You check your phone and you see several texts, the first one from Toto reads a simple Text me when you wake up. The second one is from Marc, saying Parties ahead of the Cannes film festival are just starting, thought it would be nice for us to be seen together, to silence people about our whereabouts. Only as friends though. Accommodation in my yacht. Tristan will be here, bring Sara as well. RSVP. You give it a thought, thinking about how Christian made a scene about Roscoe, and how he asked you where you were. You text Toto first, to make sure it won’t be a problem.

Woke up just fine although i would have liked you to be here and not in that stupid meeting of yours. Also, Marc just sent me an invitation about a party tomorrow and I think maybe I should go, do some pr job, give people something to talk about

Toto

You should go just don’t get too wild

You

I won’t,besides Sara will be probably coming as well.But the thing is it will be in Cannes, but I’ll make sure to be back to Nice on time for the flight

Toto

No problem

You leave your phone on dnd and continue your tasks for the day, doing some light cleaning on your apartment when the doorbell rings. You open the door and you find a donut and a cup left on your doormat, the cup has a note on "Sorry for not being here for breakfast, consider this as my not so homemade breakfast." You smile and shut the door, immediately texting Sara, inviting her over for coffee and gossip. Once she comes over you share the news on the party for which she agrees immediately and she proposes a shopping spree for the party. You agree with her and shortly after you are off to the shops where you try on different outfits, occasionally texting Toto for his opinion on some of the outfits. At the end of the day, Sara ends up with 4 or 5 bags from the shops and you buy one simple black dress from Sandro to wear for the event. You grab a drink at the Blue Gin and you head back home where you pack your bags both for the party at Cannes and for the trip to Miami. Before you get back to bed you receive a text from Marc.

Marc Taylor

I will be waiting for you tomorrow morning for our trip to Cannes

You

Where will we find you?

Marc Taylor

At the marina, we will be using my yacht obviously

You

We will be there @ 10:30. Should we bring coffee?

Marc Taylor

We have a barista on board. Just get your bags.

The next day you wake up, dressing up with a maxi sundress suitable for the yacht trip. You later meet Sara and her driver drops you off at the Monaco marina, right outside Marc’s yacht. You get on board as members of Marc’s staff get your bags on the yacht and into your rooms. You follow Marc straight ahead and join him and Tristan on the deck. You can see people with cameras taking pictures of you from the marina and you play along. You do want paparazzi to see where you are and who you are with, you are confident that they will be running the story before the party today. You greet Tristan and walk the deck, taking the sun in and gazing into the mediterranean. Sara snaps some pictures of you and then the yacht leaves Monaco and sails to Cannes. “What time does the party start?” you ask,"At 8 I believe.” Tristan replies, “We have to start getting ready as soon as we arrive there” Sara tells you

“We will arrive in Cannes in an hour, you will be needing 6 hours to get ready?”

“Haven’t you met Horner? She takes at least two hours to get ready for a day at the paddock, you think she will be getting ready in sooner than 5 hours for a party in Cannes?” Sara answers and you laugh. As you sail to Cannes, the four of you sit on the deck sipping champagne and gossiping about old acquaintances of yours until one hour later you arrive and you dock at the marina. Tristan and Marc go out for a walk and you and Sara stay on board to relax and get settled to your rooms. You leave Sara in her cabin and you relax outside on the deck. You snap a photo and post it on your stories and then start reading your book until you start getting ready, while listening to music. Tristan and Marc come an hour later and Tristan waves at you. You take your headphones off. “There’s someone that has a package for you outside”

“What package?”

“It’s an order from a fashion brand I think. They said you made the order from Monaco and sent it here”

“Oh yeah that” you say “Marc can you please get this for me?”

“Of course” Marc replies and leaves you behind with Tristan. “What are you reading?” he asks, “The Goldfinch” you tell him.

“Oh I heard it’s nice.”

“It is really good, I’ll give it to you when I finish it”

“Great! Um, by the way, have you seen Sara?”

“She’s in her cabin, probably planning today’s look. She doesn’t wake up looking as good as you see her.”

“Bet she looks even better when she wakes up” Tristan says and you burst out laughing.“You really like her don’t you?” you ask

“I do. Not as much as Marc likes you though.”

“Tristan, Marc and I have already discussed this.”

“You know he’s still trying though” he tells you but he stops talking as he sees Marc coming up to the yacht. “This is your package Miss.” says Marc and kneels in front of you showing you the box.“Thank you mr. Taylor” you tell him “I gotta go try it on and plan my look for today, see ya later losers.”. You walk away from Marc and Tristan and into your cabin where you untie the black bow on top of the box and open it to reveal a green silk dress and in the box, a black handwritten card, a handwriting you recognize."Yesterday night I was watching Succession, saw this dress on Shiv and thought it would look nice on you. Bis Bald.". You smile in disbelief and try the dress on and you manage to fish out your emerald Manolo shoes which perfectly fit the color of the dress. You decide to wear this to the party instead of your new bought Sandro dress and you undress since lunch is about to be served. After your meal you return to your room, and start getting ready. You take a shower, use a face mask and then fix your hair in a low bun chignon. You apply some light makeup and some jewelry for the party. When you get out of your cabin you see Marc and Tristan in their party suits. “Wow Horner” says Tristan but Marc just sits there staring at you. “We should try to snap some pictures until Sara is ready” he says again and pushes both you and Marc at the front of the yacht where he takes pictures of you both with your phone and your polaroid camera but his phone rings so Marc becomes your photographer for the moment. “You look stunning, the color is amazing.”

“Thanks” you say and you keep posing.

When the whole photoshoot is done you check your pictures and decide to post one of them on your story but first you want to check that everything is okay from Toto’s side

You

[Sent 2 photos]

Your wish is my command. The dress is perfect. Tristan and Marc were stunned

Wolff

I knew as soon as I saw it that it would be a perfect fit. Glad they liked it. Hope Marc keeps his hands to himself though

You

He will! About that, is it okay if I post the picture of me and him ?

Wolff

Everyone is going to talk about you two being a couple so why not feed the story to them? It’s okay by me after all ,at the end of the day only I know that you will be sleeping in my bed for the weekend

20 minutes later Tristan is already yelling at Sara to hurry up and when she does show up at the deck she sees you and stares at you. “Horner!????? What are you wearing?” she asks “You look stunning but bestie this wasn’t the plan was it?” You approach her and you whisper to her ear “It was a surprise gift I couldn’t say no to”. She scoffs. “And he won’t even bring me flowers” she says as she points at Tristan. A couple of photos later the four of you are off to the party. At the party there are a lot more photos, dancing, drinking, mingling and socializing. Everyone is enjoying the wonderful night including Sara, Marc and Tristan. You get lost in a discussion with some movie producer who happens to be at the party and at some point you see Marc approaching you along with a blonde woman, which you happen to know. “Horner!” Marc says as you greet the producer “Marc, I lost you an hour ago, where were you?”

“With this badass. I am not sure you’ve two met but, this is Francesca Scorcese”

“Taylor, I’ve met Horner before. You always forget nepo babies always know each other”

“Absolutely” you say “What have you been up to since I last saw you?” you ask. The three of you start discussing and later on partying. Late at night the party starts drifting off and your quartet returns happily to the yacht. You gather all the pictures from today, making sure there’s enough you and Marc on them so that people will start believing that you are in a relationship. You post them on your instagram captioning them as “What were your favorite nepo babies up to ?” and you shut your phone before falling asleep. The next morning you wake up and make sure everything is packed. Sara’s sister who happens to have a job in Nice and was taking care of Roscoe in the meantime comes and picks you up from Cannes and drives you to the airport where you finally meet Toto. “Morning!” you tell him and give him a little hug. You are already in incognito mode so you’re making sure no one is watching you. “Hello. How was your party night?”

“We had a lot of fun actually. You know how our events are? Not even close to that”

“At least on those events we get to be at the same place.”

“But as long as I can remember the only thing we’ve managed to do was fight” you tell him “Thanks for the dress again. Everyone was impressed”

“That is for you telling me that I don’t have any fashion sense.” he teases you “Mr Wolff, it is time to board.” the lady at the gate says. You take your stuff, carrying Roscoe in his cage as well and you board the jet. You get comfortable and get Roscoe out of his cage but you hold him on your lap, making sure that he won’t get close to Toto. The plane takes off and you drift off to sleep as the lack of sleep from your party night becomes apparent. After 3 hours you open your eyes and look out the window as you are flying mid Atlantic. It takes a minute before you realize that Roscoe isn’t on your lap anymore and you take a glance around you and you see the bulldog sleeping on Toto’s lap. You laugh at the sight, thinking how some days before Toto was afraid to death and how now he peacefully sleeps with him. You snap two or three photos and send one of them to Lewis.

You

[Photo]

Character growth! We are on our way to Miami. See you there

Lewis Hamilton

That is insane. Ah man, can’t wait to tease Toto for all of this. Thanks for the content, Horner. See you at the track!

Shortly after you drift back to sleep and you only wake up when you feel the ground below you shaking. You open your eyes and look out of the window again to see the airport of Miami. You don’t register that you have finally arrived until you hear “Miss Horner, Mister Wolff, Welcome to Miami”. Toto looks around and tells you “Let’s see what this race week brings us” and you nod, mentally preparing yourself for another week at the F1 circus.

#f1 #toto wolff #formula 1 #all's fair fic #toto wolff x reader

110 notes · View notes

buccini555 · 11 months

Note

I had in mind smut step dad bonten Kokonoi x step-daughter reader. Mother went on trip so reader was in bonten's hideout with koko. And it would be lovely to do aftercare and maybe when they go to that one room where bonten members spend time together??

Thanks have a lovely day^^

𝐁𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐬♡𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 - 𝐊𝐨𝐤𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐢 𝐇𝐚𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐞

≡ Kokonoi x step daughter reader

⌕ x r e a d e r!

♡... 𝑭𝒕. Kokonoi Hajime (Bonten!)

⚠︎!! explicit s♡x, petnames(kitten, little doll, baby girl), mention of bl♡wj♡b, unpr♡tected s♡x, curse words (b♡tch, f♡ck..) and creampie, I think that's all

I'm not good at writing about this... but I hope you like <3

... You were in one of bonten's hideouts with your dear stepfather Kokonoi, your mother had gone on a trip and would be away for months, for that reason, even if you are already an adult and know how to take care of yourself, Kokonoi would have to take care of you, and of course, the most old boy loved the fact that he couldn't take his eyes off you.

You used to tease and excite him without feeling any remorse, and this day was no different, while Hajime was busy doing his work, you sat on his lap watching those huge amounts of money he made in a matter of seconds in front of you to any computer, as soon as you sat on the oldest's lap, you started to press your body against Kokonoi's, who even at that moment, didn't care about your advances, until, after a few minutes, he closed the tabs of his navigator and concentrated and grabbed your waist, you just wore a mini skirt and a lace blouse, your body was almost completely exposed in those clothes, this fact made Hajime even more excited with you sitting on his lap.

"What do you want, kitten? Tell me" He whispered in your ear, gently caressing your beautiful face and then running his hand over your perfect body.

You remained silent, with only a slight mischievous smile stamped on your beautiful delicate face.

"Don't you get tired of teasing me while I'm working? You already got me excited again, baby girl" The oldest scolded you, of course not with the intention of making you stop what you were doing, quite the contrary, he really enjoyed being authoritarian with his girl.

He lifted you up, gently placing you on the table where he worked, giving you a brief kiss, holding you even tighter around your waist.

"Be a good girl hmm? Be a good girl for me"

You couldn't tell how excited he was and wanted to fuck you right there, but, he wouldn't do it in that spot, Kokonoi didn't like to make you feel uncomfortable for that reason, he was always as affectionate as possible.

"Come here, little doll, I'll take you to a more comfortable place, You're not going to enjoy being fucked in this rustic office, are you?"

You ignored him, continuing to kiss him insistently, however, the taller one picked you up and gently carried you to the hall where the other Bonten members gathered seasonally, that place was clearly more comfortable, Kokonoi had the time in mind of each member, then, I was absolutely sure that no one would arrive at the time.

"Tell me, do you still want to be my little bitch?" He cupped your face, putting a lot of force on your lips, at that moment, making you look helpless, you just looked at him with desire in your eyes, seeing him smile maliciously at you.

You just nodded your head in affirmation, then Kokonoi made you open his belt, making you realize again how excited he was.

"Suck it... You're begging for this, aren't you? Mmm..."

Without hesitation, you took that whole cock in your mouth, making him let out a few small moans while gently pushing his head, he also wouldn't hesitate to make you put the whole cock down his throat, so, you just continued your work being a good girl for Kokonoi.

"Y-yeah, Y-yeah!.. My little bitch! D-damn you're so good at this, who the fuck taught you how to suck a cock that good?

After a few minutes, he stopped pushing your head against his cock, making you stand up, he gave you a small smile and by the time you were lying face down on top of the table where the meetings were held, you were already wet all over enough to receive it, he made sure to jerk you off before thrusting himself in you, of course, as always, Hajime behaved like a gentleman, so he got you super stimulated, horny as fuck, how he liked it, he prepared to fuck you, the least you expected and thought that he would have a break to rest, he stuck his cock all the way and once in your pussy, without warning he started to fuck you, pulling your hair and occasionally slapping you, making you let out loud moans and a few small screams. "You didn't beg for that shit? Now hold on baby" with each thrust he repeated that you belonged to him, making you get even more turned on. "Y-you're mine, my little bitch, arg!" After a few long minutes of fucking in the same position, he stopped for a few seconds and made you turn around, he caressed your face and gave you a small kiss on the forehead before getting back into the act, as soon as he started filling your pussy again, he together began to caress your breasts, it was undeniable how much Kokonoi is affectionate with you in those moments.

"F-fuck, baby, I-im cumming!" when he finally reached his peak, the oldest just poured his "love" inside your pussy without any worries.

"I love to see my milk flow from that delicious pussy, you know that, I can't control myself."

"I will always take care of my girl" after finishing the act, seeing that you were tired, he helped you get dressed again, made you sit in one of the armchairs until you recovered and then help you take a shower, Koko showered you with kisses on the forehead and did his best to make you feel loved.

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exquisiteserotonin · 3 months

Text

Ternion

Word count: 3.3K

Pairing: Young Mr. Ben SNL(as a TA, Grad Assistant)xFemale ReaderxProfessor Jonathan Levy Scenes From a Marriage

Rating: E! For explicit (18+ only, MDNI)

Warnings: Threesome, Power Imbalance, Brat Taming, Oral Sex (F! Receiving), somewhat degrading actions

Summary: Your friend and fellow graduate assistant Ben asks you to come over to his place for help with another task that your overbearing advising professor, Jonathan Levy, has dumped on the both of you.

A/N: I don’t typically subscribe to the whole professor student thing, but this was begging to be written and I hope this means I am out of my funk and my damn season of writer’s block is over. I hope you enjoy and as always reblog, comment, engage! I would love to hear from you!

And to my sluts thank you as always for giving me your magic! @magpiepillsjunior @magpiepills @youandmeand5bucks @legendary-pink-dot @pink-whiskey-woman @redhotkitchen @arcanefox207 @for-a-longlongtime

Ternion

Ternion: a group of three, a triad; a section of a paper of book containing three double leaves or twelve pages

Your eyes were beginning to glaze over as you stared at your laptop screen. It was another long afternoon of compiling participant demographics and data from your advising professor’s study in your closet of an office. You closed your laptop a little harder than you should have as you began to pack up for the day. The parking lot behind your building was nearly empty, most students having left for the day. As you drove home, you had visions of cozying up on the couch with your blanket, drinking an adult beverage, and binge watching your favorite tv show.

You were only a few miles from your house, when the infotainment screen in your car flashed with a familiar contact: Ben, your office mate and fellow graduate assistant. Deliberation coursed through the pads of your fingertips and against your better judgment you answered.

“Hey Ben, what’s up?”

“Hey,” his voice echoed with a hesitancy, “Professor Levy asked me a for a favor and I—“

“Are you serious, Ben?” You groaned in exasperation. “This is such bullshit. ”

“I know, I know—I hate to ask but would you come over and help me out?”

Say no. Say no. Say no, your brain said on repeat. Desperation wafted from his hushed voice in a way that immediately unlocked your kindness. You just knew he was pouting, running his hands through his chocolate brown hair while somehow making his already big eyes even bigger, like glassy orbs of whiskey on ice: against your silent protests that he NOT be so easy to say yes to. But aside from that he was also the kind of colleague who’d help you out in a pinch…and too damn attractive for his own good. It certainly made having him as your office mate interesting and frustrating at times.

You gripped the steering wheel before announcing your decision.

“Well, I was legitimately on my way home,” you replied with a deliberately loud sigh. “But yeah, sure.”

It was a bitch move, you knew, but you needed your displeasure to be known. A small part of you felt bad about being so vocal with your frustration. It wasn’t Ben’s fault, but he needed to know the inconvenience of it all. You would not be at your professor’s beck and call. Especially on a goddamn Friday night.

“Just give me some time to head over,” you huffed and added, “I can’t be over there in a snap like Professor Levy would want.

“Hey now,” Ben spoke in a firm whisper that somehow still held a hint of kindness despite your bite, “don’t shoot the messenger.”

You turned the car around and headed to Ben’s house. You found parking on the street and walked up the stairs to the door of his small Brownstone. You pushed the doorbell and found yourself brushing your hands through your waves and cautiously smelling yourself.

Passable. You thought to yourself.

Then he answered the door, emerging in a snug navy blue v-neck and loose gray sweatpants slung low on his narrow hips. A hint of skin teased you between the hem of his shirt and the elastic of his pants. They held onto his hips for dear life with nothing but the insurance of a haphazardly tied drawstring. You nearly whimpered at the sight of him.

What a fucking tease. Get a hold yourself, woman.

You breezed through his door without a word, trying to quell your craving and channel it to the frustration you felt with your advising professor. This was his fault anyway.

“Um…hello to you, too,” he greeted.

Your hands were placed firmly on your hips when you turned back to face him. One of his brows was cocked at you, already waiting for another snarky response. You couldn’t help but pout back at him. He knew you too well.

“Just like him to not give you a weekend off,” you huffed.

“You don‘t even know what I‘m going to ask you,” his voice was low and sterner than you had ever heard before. “I‘m starting to think you like a little fight.“

The way his eyes bore into you was so deep, it was nearly a glare. He held his chin up in the slightest way, arrogant enough that it demanded your attention to his strong neck. It wasn’t long before you felt tiny sparks of electricity traveling over every inch of skin of your body. It didn’t help that he stood with his hips pushed forward in the most arrogant and un-Ben-like way.

“Wow, if only you could give a little bit of that attitude back to Professor Levy,” you said with some bite and unconstrained breathiness.

Conveying the facade of confidence was important. Especially in situations like this.

Ben stepped forward, his shirt and sweatpants clinging against his body in exactly the right way.

“You’re only proving me right,” he purred, now only inches from you.

Do not moan. Do not moan. Do not moan.

“Just give her what we know she needs, Ben,” you heard a polished voice command from the shadows of another room.

A different kind of heat crept over your face and neck after hearing the familiar voice.

What were the chances?

You looked towards the shadows to see Professor Levy swaggering towards you. He pushed forward a few steps, placing his hands in his trousers pockets before leaning against the wall to watch you. His eyes were low and piercing and he licked his lips that rested beneath his salt and pepper beard.

“Of course he’s here,” it came out as the repressed moan you were fighting against.

Professor Levy nodded towards Ben in acknowledgment of some kind of unspoken agreement. Faster than you could think or speak, Ben pulled your body tightly against his, grinding against you as he pressed his lips to yours in a hungry and greedy kiss.

You didn’t expect for Ben’s lips to feel as soft as they did. They were even softer when he parted yours with a firm lick of his tongue. The heat rose within you as his large hands wrapped around your waist, finding your skin beneath your shirt as he pressed your bodies even closer together. With every move he demanded you feel every twitch of his cock for you.

“W—wait!” You gasped, pushing him from you.

Your eyes moved from Ben to Professor Levy, a strange mix of unbridled desire and anxiousness stirring in the lowest part of your stomach. Ben’s thick fingers managed to keep a possessive grip on your hips that you didn’t brush away, despite the way your brain was spinning in want of answers.

“What the fuck are you doing?” You demanded of both of them.

The two men shared another knowing look that stoked the flame of your frustration. Professor Levy raised an eyebrow before removing his glasses and wiping them on a cloth he pulled from his shirt pocket. You couldn’t help but keep your eyes on him as he strutted towards you, his fingers weaving through the gunmetal ringlets of his hair. You rolled your eyes with disdain for his insufferable ways of working, but found yourself burning from your center with intrigue at what those fingers might be able to work on you.

“Always with the snark,” your professor directed the words towards Ben who responded with a shrug and a smirk.

“You will not talk about me like I’m not in the room,” you paused, turning to him and holding your eyes directly to his, “Jonathan.”

He one more large stride forward until he, too, was inches from you.

“I think you mean professor,” he commanded, continuing to advance on you until you backed into Ben.

A moan escaped you as Ben stood like a wall behind you. With your chest heaving up and down, Professor Levy brushed a strand of hair from your face with his long, lithe fingers. Yet they didn‘t stop there. The heat continued to rise from the three of you as the professor‘s hand journeyed down the curve of your body until they met Ben‘s at your hip. They shared a look of longing before turning that desire towards you. And in the strangest turn of events, the professor’s lips were on yours with his tongue paying adoration to your pouty lower lip.

Unable to contain the desire that trembled within, you let out a long, loud whimper as Professor Levy gently trapped your lower lip with his teeth. You already thought the feeling of Ben’s throbbing cock at your lower back was enough to drive you mad, but somehow you knew you were going to be pushed to your limit the moment Professor Levy took your hand to his pants until he pushed your palm to feel him twitch with desire for you.

The part of your brain that held your common sense screamed at you, demanding you not give him the satisfaction. But every other part of it, along with every part of your body, beckoned you to give in. The feeling of Ben’s massive hand moving to the front of your waist was followed by his thick fingers inching towards the front of your jeans. You couldn’t help but pant as you felt his hot breath brush the back of your neck.

“You can’t tell me that this isn’t better than the fight you put up,” Ben’s voice came to your ear in a low growl.

He wasn’t wrong. But ever true to yourself, you bit your lip and replied with a little extra spice, “I think that remains to be seen.”

Your words made Ben snap his hips forward against you with a gravelly moan. Within Professor Levy’s mahogany eyes you could see from his heavy-lidded stare the desire the two men held for each other while searching for their reason to include you.

Professor Levy lifted your chin with a push of two strong fingers, silently ordering you to look squarely into his bespectacled eyes before he spoke, “You definitely need to be taught a lesson.”

You found yourself following him to Ben’s large leather couch, with Ben close behind you, his fingers intertwined in yours. Professor Levy took his place first like a king warming his throne. He smirked as he taunted you by unbuttoning his shirt. He manipulated each button with skillful fingers until he slipped it off and let it fall to the living room floor. He spread his legs wide as he sat, smoothing his hands over the soft fabric of pants that covered his strong thighs.

Ben nibbled playfully at your neck and then your ear with desperate and needy breaths. His warm hands slowly slid beneath your shirt, moving upwards until he massaged your breasts with paws massive enough that they made them feel small. Before you could even think your shirt was gone followed by your bra.

Professor Levy beckoned you to him as he rubbed his thighs, “Come sit here…now.”

This time, you submitted without a fight, feeling the way your skin nearly melted into his as you let your back rest against his chest. His beard tickled the skin of your ear as he licked at the bottom of it. His supple fingertips reached under your arms until they found the altar of your nipples. You rolled back against him as he tortuously began to caress, flick, and pinch them even slower and more skillfully than he had with the buttons of his shirt.

“Ben,” your professor called to your colleague, friend…inevitable lover, “come here.”

You dragged your nails along the waist of his low slung sweatpants while he lifted his shirt over his head. You kept your fingers just above his waistband while he leaned over the couch towards you and your professor. It was mesmerizing to watch how these two beautiful men looked at each other with such intimacy and longing as you lay between them. Your professor took a hand from your nipples and brought it possessively to the back of Ben’s neck, pulling his face to his before licking his bottom lip and pressing onto his mouth for a slow, sensuous kiss.

“Fuck.”

There were no other words you had that could possibly convey the carnal state of desire you had fallen into. Hungrily, you pulled at the drawstrings of Ben’s sweatpants before reaching your hand to the waistband. In a lightning fast move, your professor pulled it away, squeezing your fingers between his.

“Tsk, tsk, not without my express permission,” Professor Levy scolded in a low, buttery whisper.

Slowly, Ben positioned himself at your legs, his hands caressing your waist until he began rubbing your professor’s thighs with you. Professor Levy grabbed Ben’s hand and squeezed it before lowering his eyes to him.

He spoke with unwavering confidence coating every word as he gave Ben a command that sent shivers spiraling outward from your wet center.

“Taste her.”

The wanton darkness that overcame Ben’s eyes and the smirk that curled the corner of his upper lip coaxed your heart and your pussy to throb even more than you anticipated. Your professor’s demand spurred Ben to pull off your jeans and underwear even faster than you could put any thoughts together. You sat naked between the two men in so many more ways than you’d imagined you ever would be. Through your dizzying thoughts, Ben placed a firm grip on your legs pressing them a part.

Any words you thought you could form in your head only came out in quick, pulsing gasps. An unbridled heat spread all over your body as you felt Ben’s broad fingers handle your outer lips until they began to line themselves up at your slit.

“Jonathan, she’s so fucking wet,” his voice was hushed and his breath was so hot against your pussy.

Professor Levy’s response came out in a guttural moan that met your body by way of hands continuing to work on your nipples. The theme of surprise continued as your professor and Ben played off one another in ways that only happened when two people knew each other beyond words. Ben’s nose pressed into your mound as he licked a slow, deep stripe up your center.

“Oh my god,” You cried, finding your professor’s hand with a desperate grasp as Ben began working on your pussy with slow, luxurious and hungry swirls until he moved into a varied and unexpected pace that had you shaking, writhing, and bucking against his every move. Each time his tongue worked on you, he pushed you to the very edge of ecstasy over and over and over again.

He moved his worship to your clit and pressed his face and tongue deeper into you, eliciting a cry from you that filled the room, “Jesus, Ben, fuck oh my—Professor!!”

You pressed one hand through Ben’s waves and gripped Professor Levy’s thigh while riding your high.

“Ben, tell me what she tastes like.”

He lifted his face from your center, lips and chin dripping with your spend.

“Like heaven.”

Ben looked up at you, his eyes glassy with passion and also shining with the gleam of a man hungry for more. The sight of him caused you to whimper. You had never studied his face this way before even though you shared a small space together almost daily. The broad bridge of his nose sloped downward and he breathed you in with a playful smirk before adorning your outer lips with a delicate kiss. You thread your fingers through the disheveled locks of his hair, smiling back at him until your lips opened once more as he teased you with more caresses of his fingers.

“He’s good isn’t he?” Professor Levy growled into your ear.

Your brain was spinning, your body shaking in anticipation of what was to come next. Professor Levy reached an arm over your body, maneuvering his hand towards your neck and without missing a beat, Ben pressed his mouth onto you again sucking at your lips before he dipped his tongue into you again. He continued to venerate every fold with abandon, moaning with each taste he had of you like it were the best meal he’d ever had. You didn’t think it could get any better, especially with the pressure of your professor’s hand at your neck matching the intensity of each manipulation of Ben’s tongue.

And then…

One…two of his broad fingers reached into you, curling into your tight wet pussy while his tongue paid particular devotion to your clit.

“Ah, oh my god, fuck!” You came crying, writhing, and losing any more words the tighter your professor’s grip became.

Ben’s voice vibrated against you with a low, carnal laugh as you felt the slick sensation spill from your center onto the leather beneath you. He then pressed his hands lightly at your lower belly, causing you to shudder with even more aftershocks from your orgasm. You worked through catching your breath and looked down at him. The face he greeted you with as you caressed his wavy locks was that of a bold and satisfied man who knew he could do that to you again.

Ben rose up from the floor and leaned forward until his face was close to yours. You relaxed and leaned your head back against your professor’s as he eased his hold at your neck. In an unexpected moment of tenderness, Professor Levy threaded his fingers between yours.

Ben’s eyes shined as he looked toward you and then your professor. The simultaneously tender and sensual intimacy they shared was amplified in this quiet moment. It felt so private that you were almost embarrassed by having witnessed it.

“Wanna have a taste?” Ben asked as he pressed his thumb still damp from you to Professor Levy’s bottom lip.

Your professor took it, sucking at the tip savoring the taste of you on Ben’s skin. Heavy-lidded with lust, Professor Levy let go of Ben’s thumb and then licked his lips.

“Mmm, sweet,” he murmured with a seductive and low rumble coming from the back of his throat.

Ben stood up and lifted his chin with a proud smirk. He walked to what you assumed was his bedroom and then turned around to lean against the doorway. The way he leaned his elbow above him and his other hand resting at his hip demanded you pay attention to his defined torso. The waistband of his sweatpants sat so low that your eyes had no choice but to travel down the peppering of brown hair that led to the thick treasure you were becoming so desperate for.

A light squeeze of your thighs by your professor was your signal to stand. He walked around you and used his eyes to study every curve of your body. A light touch of his fingers beneath your chin had you breathing hard again as his gaze now demanded that you give him your own. The breath from his mouth danced upon your lips. Yet instead of taking you in for a kiss, he turned from you with his hands in his pockets. You stood naked before both men watching you, waiting for you, bodies reaching for you from a doorway to a room and to a deed that you could never really come back from.

And the decision was clear. There was no way in hell you could turn back now.

You stepped forward. The old, hardwood floors creaked beneath your feet.

“Wait,” Professor Levy called out.

You closed your eyes with a sharp intake of breath and you stopped as he had demanded. Your breath quivered as you waited for what they had in store for you.

He shared another look with Ben, his eyes lowering and the brown of them becoming devilish and dark.

“Get on your knees and crawl.”

#juice collective #friends of the juice collective #pedro pascal character fanfiction #oscar isaac character fanfiction #mr. ben x reader #mr. ben snl #pedro pascal fandom #jonathan levy #scenes from a marriage #smut writing

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anjelicawrites · 3 months

Note

Reader and Michael can’t come to Billy’s due to exam season and revision. However, doesn’t mean they can’t send him videos of there own personal ways to de-stress so he doesn’t feel left out. Better yet, cause readers exams are longer than Michaels, Michael is round Billy’s when she sends him her latest round. And Billy and Michael get a little too hot and bothered to not do anything about it

Warnings: kissing, scratching, biting, masturbation, anal (m receiving), handjob, spicy video making, orgasm denial and control, Michael is a bratty sub.

NSFW and 18+ only please!

You and Michael have different dates for your exams this semester; usually there's a couple of days of difference, this year, due to the sudden illness of one of your professors and none of the TAs being available, your class is forced to sit this last exam a week later than everyone else, leaving all of you with almost no days off before the start of the term.

You are frustrated and angry, the stress for the whole situation turns your horny knobs to the maximum, not having the chance to have a quickie, with either of your boyfriends, makes having to bunk down in your room and study all the worse.

And you miss them!

It's not just the sex, it's the intimacy of sharing Billy's old couch while reading and watching telly, chatting about everything and anything, hearing them bitch and moan because you're taking too long to get ready: all those little things that let you know how much they love you, and you them.

And there's the sex, of course: making Billy beg and cry, fight against Michael for dominance, feel your mind shut down with every orgasm they give you. You miss their hands on your body and falling asleep lulled by their warmth: your room feels so cold and empty that you just want to throw all the study materials on the floor and run to Billy's flat to finally have a good night's sleep.

You stand up before you do anything stupid and walk the length of your room like a caged lion: two days of this miserable life, you have to hold on for two more days.

Your phone pings with a message, a friend from your study group slowly losing his mind over the most difficult part of the exam; you send him an encouraging text, offering to do a last study of that bit of the syllabus tomorrow.

You close the chat and your eyes fall on the group chat with your boys, the last message being a photo. It's not the raciest pic you three have shared, this one is Billy laying on his tummy with a fucked out expression on his face, droplets of sweat adorning his naked back, already marked by Michael's bite marks. It turns you on immensely because you know it's a post fuck pic and that Michael has made him beg like a whore, only to fuck him like he doesn't love him, as if Billy's feeling don't matter, as if he's only a toy.

The idea makes your cunt tingle; you can still ignore your body and throw yourself into your notes, the problem is that you don't want to.

Billy stretches his back with a groan. Between the long hours at the pub, and the vigorous fucking, his body is a mess of overused muscles and carpet rashes. Michael has been ravenous from the moment he was finished with his batch of exams; it doesn't help Billy's case that he has been quite defiant in the spicy videos he's sent him during the last few weeks, egging him on, saying he wouldn't be able to fuck Billy for hours, that he'd be too tired for the task. Michael had enthusiastically showed him how wrong he was and is now eyeing him like he's dessert.

It still surprises Billy how voracious Michael is, sex wise, that the lanky nerd with a grandpa style would, and could, reduce him into a begging mess and could go at it for hours. If he didn't know you and him had been an item before he met you two, he'd chalk it up to the fresh discovery of sex and hormones, but you two were a couple for almost a year and Michael was as ravenous as he was the first time he slept with you.

The dual ding of his and Michael's phone distracts Billy from his train of thoughts: it must be you, still trapped in exam hell.

He's worried about you, as is Michael, you look tired and stretched thin, the delay in the exam adding to your usual burden of stress and the fact that you are not leaving your college premises, to maximize your dwindling energies, means that you have no way to recharge your batteries. Billy is afraid you're going to burn yourself out and Michael knows how close you're teetering to the edge, because you've been not that active in your shared chat, not even after the last photo he's sent: if not even fucked silly Billy elicits a response from you, then something is truly wrong.

Billy carefully pads to the sofa where his phone is laying, his arse sore from Michael's use and the muscles of his legs burn with each step. Michael waits until he's sat on the sofa, before opening the message.

The video starts playing immediately: you're almost naked, wearing only your black undergarments, looking ravishing, ravenous in the way you're playing with yourself, calling their names with a broken voice.

"Christ." It's the only thing Billy manages to say.

Both him and Michael can see the desperation in your eyes, it explodes in the hurried way you make yourself orgasm, only to slow down and start again.

Unconsciously Billy's hand finds home on Michael's long neck, his thumb caressing the velvety skin as his fingers grab his poorly cut hair; he hasn't even realized he's got an erection, too focused on your body and your pleasure to feel his own and desire explodes in his loins when the video stops.

Michael is in no better condition than him, his breath comes out in short pants and his hand has already sneaked under his horrendous trousers to grab the base of his erection; he moans when Billy gently curls his fingers tighter in his hair and pulls his head backwards, forcing his long neck to arch, a temptation Billy can't resist.

Billy's teeth nip Michael's exposed Adam's apple and then his lips soothe the small harm, only to repeat the slow torture on the available skin, leaving glaring proofs of his need for Michael.

"Don't" Billy whispers as his hand grabs Michael's wrist. "Not yet." "Don't tell me what to do." Michael pants back, without a bite, he's already too far gone. "Come now and you don't get to do that later." "Bastard!" Comes out whiner that Michael would like. "Payback is a bitch, innit?"

Without you functioning as a buffer, their lovemaking is always rougher, the power struggle more prominent than when you're around to keep the situation under control; but you're in your college room, neck deep in your study material, and not in Billy's living room, pressed between them on the couch, sharing kisses and small love bites.

Michael tries to gain the upper hand again, but his tongue fails to subjugate Billy's and the latter's hand right around his base strips Michael of any vestige of control: Billy is going to fuck him, raw and fast, until Michael loses any form of sanity.

Michael's body arches when Billy's hand starts jerking him fast and rough, your last video on repeat in the background because you look too fuckable.

"Asshole!"

Michael shouts when Billy releases his cock with a smirk. This pleasure in exerting control is a new rush Billy is still trying to understand, used as he was to be the more submissive one: the way his cock seems to swell when Michael stares at him with accusing eyes, full of tears and frustration, still surprises him.

"I told you, not yet." He's still not sure where this cold voice comes from, but he likes it. "On your knees, face on the sofa." "Make me".

Michael is nothing short of a pain in the side even when he wants to be taken and fucked stupid, Billy is happy to oblige with a hand in his hair to roughly push him on the worn carpet, the other busy with removing his ugly trousers. The blatant show of brute strength flies directly to Michael's cock, who almost comes untouched. The hand on his back that keeps him face first on the sofa drives him absolutely mad with the need to misbehave, just to see what Billy would do.

Billy stares at Michael's long back, the fine, almost white hairs illuminated by the dying light of the day a beautiful contrast with the marks his nails have left there. On a whim he licks a long stripe where the deepest ones lay, his lips suck on the inflamed skin until Michael moans and tries to kick back with his arse.

"Are you going to fuck me, or what?" Michael barks from under him. "For someone with his arse up in the air, you sure talk big a lot."

Billy tries to infuse his voice with control, in truth he doesn't know how long he's going to be able to not ravish Michael: the way he struggles against his hold, the shift of his muscles under his pink skin and your moans in the background are driving him absolutely mad.

Michael tries to push back again, his ridiculous lack of strength clear against Billy's, who is used to move around kegs of beer for a living. His umpteenth act of disobedience wins him a round of spanking, given with Billy's full strength, that reduces him into a puddle of pain and want.

"You done?" Billy is tethering on the edge and hopes Michael doesn't realize.

Michael doesn't respond but shoots him a dirty look.

"You're always going to be a pain, aren't you, genius boy? All that brain and still you play the brat."

Michael's erection is painful, hanging between his legs; it hurts to wait but he doesn't want to bend his stiff neck. He brushes his arse against Billy's hardness, enticing him to fuck him like he deserves; this time Billy doesn't punish him but presses his raging erection between his arse cheeks, grinding against the abused skin until Michael whines in pain.

"All that brain flies out of the window when you want some cock, innit?"

Michael moans when cold lube is poured over his hole and Billy prepares him fast and rough, forcing his hole to gape, just because he can.

Billy grabs his hips, pulling him backwards, forcing Michael to put his weight on his arms; Billy's phone is in front of his eyes, your video all Michael can see now, your pleasure makes him moan with the need to smother his face in your wet pussy until he can't breathe.

Both men groan when Billy's head breaches Michael's hole.

"Always so bloody tight." Billy spats and Michael's hole clenches reflexively.

With slow pushes and pulls, Billy sheaths himself in Michael's arse, grinding cruelly when he finally bottoms out, making Michael keen and buck under him.

"Shh, shh, be good." Billy caresses his sweaty hair. "Do you want to do something for our baby?"

Michael can't find the words to respond, he can just nod his head with an empty brain: he'll do anything for you.

Michael's phone is shown in front of his face, set on record; he can see his own expression, his slackened mouth and the spit almost falling from his lips.

"Let's put on a show, shall we?"

Michael's begging starts immediately, Billy's pushes are too hard and fast for him not to, his insides accepting the invasion without a fight, his arse clenching painfully when Billy fucks against his prostate brutally, sparks of pleasure exploding in his belly that turn into a fire when Billy grabs his shoulders and forces Michael's back against his front, sitting him on his erection and bucking under him wildly.

Michael's head lolls back, spit falling from his mouth, desperate moans and high pitched keens spilling from his lips without his control. Billy's hands keep him still, forcing him to take all he's giving, Michael's erection slaps painfully against his tummy and he feels like Billy is going to split him in a half.

"Oxford's math genius fucked like a whore. What would everyone think of you if they could see you now?" Billy pants.

The way Michael's arse curls around his erection after his words almost hurts and he has to redouble the strength of his pushes.

"Would you like that? For everyone see you like this?" "No...ah!" "Then why is your arse tightening this way?"

Michael's body arches, his hands scratch and grab all the skin he can reach as Billy grinds cruelly against his prostate.

"You're going to come now." Billy says grabbing his chin, forcing him to look at the phone. "Let our sweetheart see your face, how much you love this."

Michael's hands grab Billy's hair to try and keep himself in position, one of Billy's hands curls around his cock to jerk it fast and rough; Michael has to force himself to keep staring at the phone, showing you what you can't see now, but the pleasure is too much, his nerves scream with it, his brain complete mush and he can't scream anymore, he comes with his eyes rolling back in his head, his body a mere ragdoll for Billy to fuck.

Billy isn't too far behind, the feel of Michael's body letting go completely kicks his own orgasm and he comes with a tortured moan and slumps against Michael, the two of them falling on the sofa, breathless.

"Mmmh, don't" Michael whispers when Billy tries to pull his softened cock out. "You'll get cramps. Behave." "Or you can get hard again." He moans, trying to wiggle his arse. "He's insatiable." Billy says to you through the recording.

Michael mewls when Billy's fingers grab his hair to pull his torso up again, to show you his face, the reddened cheeks and the spit on his chin, his almost vacant eyes. He's so pretty after he's been thoroughly fucked.

"We're proud of you." Billy continues. " And we miss you."

Billy lets his cock slip out of Michael's hole and the other man slumps against him, pliant and ready to be fucked again.

"Do you have anything smart to add?" "Come soon." Michael manages to say, he's so tired, he wants to be touched and to eat your pussy so bad! "You're probably going to do that sooner." Billy answers. "Do you want to film it? Show our baby how much you need to be fucked again?" "Yeah." He keens, hiding his face against the curve of Billy's neck.

You're in for a treat when you finish your studies for the day. Billy will make sure of it.

Cringefail throuple taglist: @fan-goddess @solisarium @lexwolfhale

#cringefail throuple #billy washington x reader x michael gavey #billy washington x y/n x michael gavey #michael gavey x reader #michael gavey x y/n #billy washington x reader #billy washington x y/n #michael gavey #billy washington #answered

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zjpg · 10 months

Text

just a girl

'happy holidays'

prev - m.list - next

[december]

liked by pierregasly and 3,205,582 others

addilynleblanc ending the season off with p4, not bad. congratulations to everyone this season, you all did amazing! thank you to my team for the amazing work. thank you to the friends and family who have been supporting me and staying up late to watch me race (pls get some sleep...). and thank you to the fans that believed in me and supported me through everything. i would also like to confirm that i have officially signed a multi-year contract with @/redbullracing, so i'll be keeping my seat for a lil while longer. if you need me, i'll be with my family getting ready for the holidays. i wish everyone happy holidays and a happy new year ❤️💙

tagged: cristianhorner, maxverstappen, pierregasly, landonorris, carlossainz55, arthur_leclerc, charles_leclerc, redbullracing, lewishamilton, sebastianvettel (enter the whole grid here)

view all 4,294 comments

user1 great job this season!

user2 MONSTER ROOKIE!!!

redbullracing Can't wait to see you next season 😉

user3 you belong anywhere else but rb

lewishamilton Great season! -> liked by pierregasly, charles_leclerc, addilynleblanc, and more

user4 Women need to know their place. -> sebastianvettel No, it's people like you that need to know their place.

sebastianvettel Amazing work kid, can't wait to see what you do next year. Enjoy the holidays -> addilynleblanc thank you seb🥹

landonorris Carlos and I are so cool -> addilynleblanc keep telling yourself that

user5 seb standing up for addi🥹🥹 -> liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, and addilynleblanc

charles_leclerc christmas in monaco!😁😁 -> liked by addilynleblanc, nolanleblanc, and arthur_leclerc

claire.newbet i'm happy for you and all, but hurry up and get home. -> addilynleblanc 🫡

user6 i was hoping red bull would drop her.

claire what was lando doing in your hotel before you left bahrain?

addi how tf- nothing, we played cod and talked

claire oh, charles told me you had lando over that night before the flight

addi yeah, everyone else left already and arthur was sleeping. so i had no one to talk to. lando offered to come over and cheer me up

claire i knew you were upset that night why didn't you call us?

addi i just didn't wanna talk about it i didn't even talk about it with lando. we watched my highlights from the race and then played cod before we had to leave

claire i can't believe he got you interested if call of duty- all you've ever played was your sim and mario😭😭😭

addi i played gta!!!

claire yeah to drive around and run people over-

addi hushhhhh he and pierre are coming to monaco for our party btw!

claire yessss. i'm making that cake then since there's gonna be more people i'm buying jäger too better ask boss man for cases of red bull.

addi not sure he'd be too happy about that😭

claire you're always fun after jagerbombs, so get to askin!

addi i'm always fun. period.

claire sure babe😁

pierrei haven't seen you drunk since your signing celebration

addiyou've seen my tipsy

pierrenot the same as shitfaced. btw. did you talk to arthur?

addino, kinda been avoiding that. i don't like drama like that during the season

pierrei get that.

addihow did you know he liked me back then?

pierrehe told me. said that he liked you for a while, but he was confused and wasn't sure how it would go if you dated or even knew about his feelings. you guys had been friends for so long. then after he told me i started noticing how much people loved you guys together, and i saw how you were around each other.

addithat's why you moved on?

pierreyeah, tbh. i should've been smarter about it. but to be fair i didn't think you liked me like that, i thought the kiss was just a spur of the moment for you.

addiaside from my kiss with the ferrari bitch when i was 4, you were my first kiss

pierrethe ferrari bitch, i'm using thatand i'm sorry you had to have your first real kiss like that

addieh, it's a story to tell in the future i guess.

pierrei'm sorry for it all really... it wasn't right.

addiit's in the past. i'm not gonna say it was okay, because it wasn't and still isn't. but i forgive you ik you're a better person than that. we all make mistakes.

pierrekinda like your crash in monaco😁

addifuck. off.

pierrei'm kidding. but really, i'll make up everything to you one day.

addiand i trust that gasly🫶🏻

taglist: @love4lando @fairiepoems @leilanixx @ietss @charli123456789 @ayoanna @enhacolor

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milknhonies · 5 months

Text

A Lesson In Service

Masterlist || Chapter 2

Chapter Summary: In 1880 you are hired as the governess of Lord Dalgliesh's children. When you meet your employer after months of already being in his employment you feel a strange change in your position. It's terrible when we discover the people we are expected to trust are as wicked and evil as the devil

Pairing: Lord!Henry Dalgliesh x Governess!reader

Chapter Warnings: 18+ Dead Dove Do Not Eat, Dubious Consent, Indimidation, Drugging, Implied infidelity, implied sex trafficking/solicitating, Implied sexual abuse, manipulation, blackmail, Victorian era period typical sexism.

Word Count: 8.5k

Author Notes: My dream cast is Henry Cavill as Lord Henry Dalgliesh. Colin Firth as Colin Fowler. Cillian Murphy as Cillian Walsh. Ben Barnes as Benjamin Byrnes. Natalie Viscuso as Natalia Naclerio Tom Hiddleston as Tom Ransome. Smut is next chapter.

Inspiring Song: “How many miles to Babylon.” child's lullaby

London, England 1888, Saturday 14th January. 18:45pm.

A loud crack of thunder rattled the windows to the study where a man sat back cradling a glass of scotch.

Henry Dalgliesh was most incredibly not a kind or purely generous gentleman. Long ago he’d learnt to accept the rude whispers about his behaviour, he believed being bothered by comments made by those lower than he in title was pointless prattle to even hear. Thank God for his large fortune, physical attractiveness and major title that allowed him to spend, whore, drink, gamble, and travel to wherever he dared to venture.

A shine of lightening defined the shadows of his chiselled jaw, his presence was forever intimidating. A wicked smirk laced across his devious face; he raised his scotch and toasted the frozen grin of his past wife’s portrait over the fireplace. Her painted golden locks shining as bright as they did when cascaded over their marriage bed, and her casket.

The late lady Natalia Dalgliesh or rather Naclerio, the unfaithful wench, had often accused him of being a cold and a selfish monster. He chuckled to himself at the memory of her tears along with her cruel tone. She was right. But what of she? At constant, a needy bitch in heat? A nymphomaniac? For her, was he not enough? Henry truly had tried with Natalia, at least for a time he forced himself to be what she had envisioned.

He huffed and set his drink aside on his desk.

Sweet Natalia, goodness was she a darling piece. She obviously used her own innocent beauty to gain the attention of anything that could mount her. Henry did wonder, where did he go wrong? Was his size not to her desire? Was her appetite craving another type of bodily position he did not know? How was he not satisfactory? She should’ve known better than to marry him knowing full well he was not a man of pure affections.

In the end however he would forever remember her vile speech about how she had never loved him not that he cared- and that he was not even the legitimate father of their two darling children. Just like now he experienced a swirl of nausea in the pit of his stomach and a burning headache to his temple.

He lifted the scotch and pelted it at the painting, glass and alcohol splattered across her face down her neck and into her bosom he ever so missed. Her expression mocked him, that smile, the same lips that tricked him into losing fifteen years of valuable time.

He hated her.

Henry bit his lip and snarled, “Good riddance, you selfish cunt...you should count yourself lucky...Lucky it wasn’t my own hand that ended you.” Tears filled his eyes. His bottom lip trembled.

And sometimes, he missed her.

A whole year had went by. The four seasons changing back into the one that began his torment. Little Marianne and Michael, his beloved children had been sorely neglected for so long he knew it was time to return home. After the exposure of their false parentage, he felt an agony in even them knowing that their faces were of no spawn of his, Henry admitted he needed to man up and care for what his stupid wife left behind.

Yes, it was now time for the Earl of Jersey to return home to his estate of Radier Manor.

He buried his face into his hands and sighed, before plucking up the unopened envelope by his desk.

Radier Manor Jersey, England 1888, Monday 9 April. 01:30 pm.

On a canvas was a very artistic image of a charcoal vase of flowers. Leaves and petals shaded in nothing but strategic black strokes. You were delicately scraping the black drawing charcoal across the white papers when the intruding house keeper Mrs Sharpe simmered inside the children’s nursery.

The wrinkled prude sneered distinctively towards the you and you lessons to the two children, sitting on either side of you. Her dark greying hair appeared a little to tightly pinned today. Her thin lips slightly redder than normal...your eyes tried not to strain at the possibility of rogue on her cheeks. You forced a kind grin at her arrival.

“Miss Y/L/N,” Mrs Sharpe scowled, “I’m to inform you that you are required downstairs to the masters’ study immediately. He has just officially arrived and desires the attention of all new staff in his study, now,” her lips tightened whilst looking you up and down, “Oh! And do...I pray- make yourself a little presentable.”

The callously spoken crone tapped her cheek in reference to the black marks covering your face and rolled her eyes in annoyance as she spun sharply around to leave.

Your forced grin fell once the elder woman noisily stalked out of the room with her keys rattling away on the hip of her chain.

Rubbing your hands clean on your art apron you then turned and smiled to the two younglings in your care.

A pair of twins aged eight years old with dark reddish hair and similar features. The boy beheld blue eyes while his sister gained a pair of hazel.

“Well, my little darlings, I suppose our lesson in art must be placed on wait until tomorrow? I shall see you at supper and tomorrow we shall continue our art lesson but with watercolours instead.” You smiled at an excited Michael who unpinned the scribbly mess and Mary, who perched over her own work of rose sketching. Black smudges covered little Mickey’s hand who had given up his attempt of drawing daffodils and went by a creative approach of squiggly lines and stick figures of those in the household.

Nanny Nettle who sat in the corner of the room, polishing the children’s shoes chuckled, “Sharpe doesn’t make no move to hide her ill feelings towards you.”

You sighed, shrugged and looked to the elderly scots woman with a look of despair written across your face, “Mrs Nettle, I don’t understand,” You started to pack up the art equipment into a small supply chest and carried the box of art equipment to the children’s bookshelf, putting them away. Michael folded his picture to his chest while his sister placed her art on her miniature duchess.

While you folded the canvas stands the woman with her twinkling milky eyes observed you with an amused curl in her lip.

“I have been governess here for most of the winter and this spring, but Mrs Sharpe still treats me like a unwanted pest- I have done naught but share my kindness, my patience and my help around the estate: I mean really? What have I done to upset her so?” You approached the nanny and sat at her feet wiping your face with the corner of your apron of any black marks.

The children went and washed their small hands in the basin and hung their aprons on a wall hook.

“What have you done to offend her, lass?” Nanny Nettle grinned and shook her head, pausing her polishing she reassuringly patted the young woman’s cheek.

“I gather it be that she didn’t have a say in your employment to the household dear. That cow likes having everything under her control,” She cackled suddenly, “O’ course, it also don’t help that her nephew Thomas, that footmen who likes to smoke in the barn, can’t seem to keep his eyes off your chest when you waddle pass, acting like a drooling dog he does.”

You gawked and quickly fled to Mary’s side, holding her ears, if you had another hand you would’ve covered Mickey’s too.

You softly hissed with a flushed face, “Please Mrs Nettle, I must request you keep a decorum of respectful language in front of the children. And furthermore,” you flushed, “I don’t appreciate your jesting since I’ve never seen Mr Ransome acting so beastly as that. He is a gentleman.”

The older woman chuckled at your sweet innocent alarm and shrugged, “Alright, I’m merely explain’ why that housekeeper

‘Hoity Toity’ has it out for you, dear.”

You sighed and released the confused Mary who was very curious about why her Nanny compared her father’s footman to a puppy. In the end of her mind boggling, the girl went to sit on her bed and play with her doll she had come to name Antoinette.

The Nanny pointed her wrinkled finger at the door and then jabbed it back at the you, “Best be off downstairs Governess, the master don’t like to be kept waiting. He’s not known for his patience, lord knows I couldn’t teach it to him.”

Breath hitching, you nodded vigorously and hung the apron on the hook before you fled outside the nursery, down the hall to the stair case. You hurriedly descended the stairs while you prayed desperately that the Earl of Jersey did not take the same disliking to you that housekeeper Sharpe had. Fixing your hair into what you deemed suitable, you skated passed the kitchens.

It was honestly a miracle you had this position. You were a newly officialised governess just starting out in your first family, becoming employed on your first letter of recommendation written as a favour by a friend of your late father, Lord Colin Fowler. You desperately vowed to help the children grow fruitfully and improve intelligence majorly. Your wages were above the average at fifty pounds a year, including the free house boarding and food.

You knew there would be a time and day where you would need to ask or at least thank your employer for his generosity. You had worried that when you would meet him, he would see you for what you really were...a country mouse with only the capacity to teach what little you knew in the arts and literature.

Biting your lip, you decided all you wanted in this world was acceptance. And you truly needed the lord of the estate to accept you; Your father’s debt rested heavily on your shoulders at the moment. Your mother died a few days after the birth of your little sister Odette, and your father was a tremendously poor loser in gambling poker. He’d left you and Odette with a cough that killed him along with no money or respectable station in society.

At only a young age of eighteen, you’d been forced to leave the quiet life of the pastures in the south for the employment of the east. Boarding the ship out to this island was the most scary thing you had to partake. And in fact you had casted your bowls over the sides of the rocking boat more than twice.

Your twelve year old sister Odette was thankfully now in the custody of the kind and charitable Lord Fowler who only required a monthly fee to care for her which you were utterly grateful for. It was unfortunate though that even after the auctioning of your family cottage and small farm, plus your exuberant wages was still not enough to entirely pay the debts Mr Y/L/N left. If you were not so frugal with the expenses of books and dresses you owned, you wouldn’t be getting by and that terrified you.

‘Do not fall front you silly girl’, you mentally scolded, ‘if you muck up it’ll be Odette to pay for it.’

Reaching the closed door of the Earl’s study, you stood frozen and hesitated from twisting the door handle. Mentally and physically prepping yourself, you straightened your back and held your head high- but not too high to present too confident in a man’s presence, let alone an Earl.

Quickly you checked your hair again and the hairpins that secured it down in the ‘appropriate style’. Your hands you then noticed trembled, ‘goodness why am I so nervous!?’ your shaky fingers pressed down on your dark navy skirt.

You bit your lip and self-assuredly nodded, finally lifting your hand up to the wood and serving three slight taps. The door opened wide, behind it was Mr Cillian Walsh, the house’s head butler and supposedly personal keeper to the Lord Dalgliesh.

The butler gave you a grand smile, he was one of the most friendliest of the staff here in Radier

Manor. He was the one to first welcome you when you had gotten off the boat many moons ago. And Cillian was extremely helpful and kind, especially when it came to the children. He was the one to inform the little dears of their father’s planned return.

“Miss Y/N, do come in,” he whispered and fondly winked, “His lordship is eager to meet you.”

He stepped aside and bowed his head a little to you. Stepping into the study for the first time, you noticed another young man waiting inside. He clearly was another new employee of the household.

And in front of him was an extremely handsome male.

You had seen his painting in the drawing room but it was nothing compared to his true form. The Earl was sitting behind his large desk and when you walked into the room you witnessed him rise at your entrance. Y/N’s eyes widened. The painting depicted him with an image of late forties but now you gathered his age to be somewhere in his middle thirties or early forties. The painter had drastically aged him. His chiselled jawline and thin lips romanticised his face along with his soft brown curls falling like gentle swirls down his cheek.

What the painting hadn’t entailed too was his height. By god he would have put Goliath to shame giant. You had never met such a broad and tall man in your life. Your eyes widened as he slowly bowed his head to you respectfully.

Snugly fitted to his muscular frame was a black waistcoat that matched his deep blue eyes. It wasn’t hard to say you felt a tickle of attraction to this man. On his left hand a gold band entrapped his finger.

‘That’s right, he was a married man’.

You swallowed quietly and moved to stand beside the younger stranger with a leaner appearance, and dashing mid length Jett black hair.

The Earls gaze was dominating. His aura intensely intimidating. And it was all pinned directly onto you...poor thing. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach as the Earl’s eyes paused in front of you.

You kept your eyes low under his cool regard and fought to stand still and not fidget.

“Good day, it is my desire to formally welcome you both to Radier Manor despite the unfortunate obvious that one of you has been in my care for a few months already,” your employer said glancing your way while he stepped forward from behind his desk, “As I am sure you must already know, I am Henry Dalgliesh, the Earl of Jersey.”

Cillian gestured his white gloves hand to you while clearing his throat, “My lord, this is Miss Y/N

Y/L/N, the new governess.”

You curtsied too low and before it was too late you almost tripped yourself onto his shoes when his heavy hand caught your shoulder. A rush of blood dusted your face from nervous embarrassment. You wobbled back onto your feet and softly apologised for your clumsiness, eyes staring at his shoes.

Unseen by you, Henry smirked. Holding his palm out to you, you gently laid her own clammy own into his hand. He bent his head, his eyes set on your heated face while his oh so very soft lips pressed against the hot skin of your fingers, “Miss Y/L/N, It is a pleasure to make your official acquaintance after all this time.”

His facial expression was unreadable, only that he appeared to be kind and polite…

‘Oh goodness, he smells divine, like baked biscuits!’

The butler cleared his throat again, “and here Sir, is Mr Benjamin Byrnes, the secretary from Wimbledon.”

Cillian continued to inform the master about his benefits for this particular Secretary but you were too distracted by the Earls penetrating eyes that had refused to stop staring you down. Your heart pounded against your chest, you felt like you body was being dragged towards him despite being completely still and unmoving. Your eyes locked for a painfully wonderful eternity.

You exhaled gratefully when the Cillian led you and the secretary out of the study after Henry shook Benjamin’s hand and allowed the you both to remain employment. You felt weak and tired by your first encounter. After all you never expected to experience such an debilitating presence.

Radier Manor Jersey, England 1888, Monday 9 April. 18:30 pm.

That night Lord Henry didn’t make his appearance at supper, he was too busy under some account, which sourly upset the children who missed their father greatly.

And when said that they were upset, they were very, very disappointed. The twins had become woeful and unpleasantly behaved, deciding to ignore their food and gossip about what their father had done while he was away.

Marianne was mature and stated confidently that he was a business man perform business duties, when asked what duties they were she was unable to answer.

Michael on the other hand was a wild imagination. He was certain that his father had been away fighting criminals and bringing justice to the realm. He stabbed his mutton and exclaimed it was how he believed his father ran a sword through wicked men.

As Cillian passed with a tray to take to the masters study he paused and pinched Michaels cheek, before commanding the boy eat his dinner lest it turned totally cold.

After dinner concluded Nanny Nettle took them back to the nursery to ready for bed...

But as you were making your way down to the servant quarters where your room laid, you were nearly knocked over by a hurling body that flung itself back when it collided with your strong body.

You rubbed your belly with a light groan and looked dow at the floor and baring witness to one of your students.

Michael’s shirt front had a large wet spot. His red face was scrunched up, puffy crying eyes spilled tears and down his nose and chin was a trail of snot and drool. His little fists clenched and unclenched while he continued to wipe his face on his soaked sleeves. He was crying loudly.

Shockingly he stood up and collided into you but this time clung to you and held up his hands in silent pleas. Between tears he was clearly crying out sentences that were incoherent. You carefully pieced together what was wrong when you managed to hear, “Papa”.

Sighing you bent onto your knees and cupped under his armpits and lifted him up onto your hip and held him close, rocking him softly. He reminded you in that moment of your sister Odette who cried when your father died. You patted his back, he was a baby missing his parents. You rocked him as he clung to your shoulders.

The little boy sobbed into your neck and held onto you like you were a life anchor.

“O’Mickey dear, hush now, hush,” You gently cooed as you walked him to the nursery which conveniently was just down the hallway.

Your heels clicked to the thudding of the nursemaids’ feet just as she called around the corner “Michael! Where are you, Lad!? There you are!” She puffed, following her was Marianne who also looked to have been crying with the red hue of her eyes.

You turned to Mrs Nettle and smiled sadly, “I think someone won’t be letting go anytime soon,” just as you said this, Michael tightened his grasp on her blouse and shoved his head deeper into your neck, “Shall I put the children to bed?”

The Nanny looked slightly shocked at the offer, her grey brows raised and jaw dropped before sputtering “O’ course lass, I’ll get their nightclothes.”

As she tried to walk pass you into their bedroom, you reached out and touched her hunching shoulder. You knew the children needed a female figure who was frankly a lot younger than Mrs Nettle, sixty five years younger perhaps.

“Please Mrs Nettle, I can manage. Come Marianne, time for bed,” You held out a hand to the girl that tilted her head and bit her lip, reaching out to grab at your hand.

After bidding the Nanny a good night the three of you went inside.

Closing the door behind them, you softly sighed and brushed through Michael’s auburn curls with your fingers trying to sooth him a little more as his crying dialled down to sniffles. Slowly you sat on his bed, Marianne sat on hers across you both.

“Mary darling,” you gentle asked, rubbing her brothers back, “Could you please fetch yours and your brother’s night clothes?”

“Yes Miss Y/L/N,” She sniffled and smiled sweetly before hurrying off to the draws and closet.

Eventually you detached little Michael from your body and laid him down on the mattress. You quickly undressed the boy and soothingly brushed his wet cheeks with your thumbs. When

Marianne came back with the clothes, you made it your sole duty to ready them for bedtime.

The two hadn’t seen their father in over a year is what you had heard through the staff and on the day of lord Henry’ return he is ‘too busy’ for them?

You beckoned Marianne closer, you slipped off Marianne’s skirts and slipped over her head her long white nightgown. Marianne mumbled as she tugged her night dress on, “Pap- I mean Father, he did not want to wish us a good night and,” she choked, her little lips started to wobble, “Mrs

Sharpe smacked Michael across the cheek when he would not obey to leave.”

You gasped and brought her into your arms. While holding her close, you heard her ask on the brink of a sob, “Does he not really love us?”

‘What kind of man would act such a way ’, you grumbled to yourself, ‘and here I thought he was a very good looking man inside as he was outside. He’s unkindly neglectful of the family who missed and love him dearly.’

Then you sighed, ‘maybe he’s an extremely important man concerning business matters. He does after all own land on which now is booming with tourists.’

“I am sure your father loves you dearly Marianne,” you cooed and rubbed her back as she hiccuped.

Buttoning up his night shirt and wiping his wet face with his sleeve cuff, Michael had calmed down completely.

Turning her around to undo her braids, Marianne asked, “Miss Y/L/N? Can you…can you please sing to me and Mickey?”

Your fingers froze in Marianne’s hair. Such a request was endearing to you but was it too intimate? The girl turned around and forced herself into a hug between you . It was Marianne’s teary eyes that forced you to cave in.

“I can Mary,” you assured and pinched her shoulder playfully, “After you’re in bed.”

A bright grin returned to the little girls face. She and Michael eagerly clambered into their beds, diving beneath the covers.

You tucked the blankets of both their beds and made sure their sheets rested up to their chins. Then you laid Antoinette the dolly beside Mary on her pillow and picked up a toy solider off the floor, setting it on the bed side table next to little Michael. The two children gazed up to you awaiting their lullaby from their governess.

Carefully you knelt onto the floor and turned down the kerosene lamp on their shared bedside draw. Humming first and slowly slipping into song, you sang…

“How many miles to Babylon? Three score miles and ten.” They smiled and gasped lightly, happy and content.

“Can I get there by candle-light? Yes and back again.”

The little ones nuzzled into their pillows and smiled at you after sneaking a glance at each other almost as though they were keeping a secret with one another.

“If your heels are nimble and light, three more miles and ten, you may get there by candle-light there and back again.” You kissed each of their foreheads and tapped their noses softly.

“King and Queen of Cantelon, How many miles to Babylon?”

You stood and went to the curtains and drew them open, up in the night sky was a full moon shining down on them.

“Eight and eight, and another eight. Will I get there by candle-light?”

Coming back to the children, kneeling next to them you noticed Michaels mouth open wide and yawn silently. His eyes shut lose and his yawn lift his lips softly parted. Exhaustion took him first.

“If your horse be sprite and good and your spurs be bright.”

You continued to the last line of the diddy as you observed Marianne’s lashes fluttering down.

“How many soldiers there have been? More than yee dare come and see."

You laid your hands over both their belly's and rubbed small circles into them.

"How many miles to Babylon? Three more miles and ten. Can I get there by candle-light? Yes and back again."

Their chests lifted up and down with the steady slumber they fell into.

You whispered the final line, "Yes and back agaaiiinn."

It was such a sweet sight. You knew deep in your heart you loved them, for such little bodies they had such big hearts. From the moment you arrived they had been nothing but joyful creatures and to see them distraught so terribly by their father and housekeeper broke your heart. You smiled and rose from the floor to kiss both of their little foreheads again. Each softly moaned in their sleep and turned their heads into the pillows away from your sweet kisses.

Turning the kerosene down completely, You walked out of the nursery into the door way and carefully closed the door behind you. You prayed it wasn’t too loud to wake them up.

The sound of movement caught your attention away from the nursery, your eyes viewed a slight shadow moving through a door way at the end of the hall. For a moment you clenched the front of your blouse in fear of any ghosts.

‘Must be a servant cleaning one last room.’

You had no fear and no knowledge of any existing dangers. You decided to not worry, after all you were clearly safe and just needed to go to bed. You were tired from a day of work and meeting the formidable master of the manor.

Radier Manor Jersey, England 1888, Monday 9 April. 18:56 pm.

You retreated to the quiet sanctuary of your room. Located on the same floor as the laundry parlour but its door was opposite the wall. You were still grateful for your given room, since it was bigger than your own cottage one on the farm you sold off, not only that but the bed mattress was so comfortable that most morning you’d lay there and pray it was Sunday so you didn’t have to rise up and sleep in until the afternoon church service in town. In fact the only issue with your room was the lack of warmth with no fireplace.

Stripping down to nakedness you ripped over your head your cotton nightgown before unpinning your hair. Placing each pin onto the duchess and scratching your scalp you sighed and preceded to slink into your bed. You shut your eyes preparing for the world of being governess another day. Though after turning and tossing beneath the covers that provided the tiniest of warmth for another hour, you huffed and flung the sheets away. Sleep just wasn’t an option tonight.

It was like an itch as your mind trailed off in recalling all the activities of the day and vaguely came to remember the meeting with his lordship. O’ how he had kissed your hand in his study. The odd sensation of butterflies returned to your belly. Your thumb rubbed over the spot where his lips had touched.

‘Did he kiss every young ladies hand like that? Surely not? I should perhaps be offended by such impropriety...what would his wife have thought? He should still be in mourning, as should I...o’ he is a Earl after all...and he’s paying you plenty good, don’t be ungrateful over a light kiss on your hand.’

It was scandalous if thought long and hard about. But maybe that’s how lord’s greeted women of any standing.

You giggled to yourself as you imagined a scene of that wrinkly dragon Mrs Sharpe getting her paws kissed by the Earl. You imagined he would be very displeased doing so while the old beastly woman would salivate! What a lark!

Radier Manor Jersey, England 1888, Monday 9 April. 22:13 pm.

Knowing you were never going to sleep any time soon, your stomach made a faint murmur.

You believed that Mr Mikkelsen the cook wouldn’t mind if you went into the kitchen and snuck out a warm glass of milk and one of his sweet baked treats, surely that would aid this sleepless night? You rose from the bed with a sigh. Covering yourself with a wrapper that laid on the bar at the foot of the bed.

Making your way out of your room and through the halls that lead to the kitchen, your bare feet padded quietly across the carpet of the sitting room. You graciously were thankful for the moonlight that lit up the home through the unclosed curtains.

Your eyes casted to the wall above the unlit fireplace. His painting hung large and proud. The artwork held no candle to his true masculine beauty but might resemble his figure in another ten years. The moon truly reflected the blue eyes that lay on the canvas; they seemed to watch your every movement and with the stern frown brushed on his lips he didn’t look very pleased with your late awakening.

You tried not to think to hardly on your imagination.

Tiptoeing across the main entrance hall you sighed, finally you’d arrived. The wooden door was inches away from your fingertips, awaiting the moment you’d push it open; but something wasn’t right… Since a prickling sensation that trailed from the top of your skull, down your spine and through your legs suddenly sparked.

“Is it regular that you would wander about your employers home alone in the dark at night? Or is it just mine that’s so much more intriguing?”

Biting back a squeal of fright, you wheeled around to find that behind you was the Earl who had caught you attempting to sneak in the kitchen. His form was relaxed against the stair rail as he glared you down like a naughty child with arms folded across his chest similar to that of a displeased parent. Lord Henry body was basking in nothing but the light of the moon. His coat and cravat were long gone, his dark blue banyan draped over his shoulders and tied around his waist.

His height frightened you and made you feel inexplicitly tiny as a mouse.

This was your second meeting and now you realised how much you possibly looked like a dirty

thief.

You bit your lip and wrapped your arms around yourself nervously. It suddenly was obvious how immodest you appeared in your night garments, wandering about the house. You felt your breath quicken.

‘God, please don’t let him sack me’, you prayed.

You were already beyond humiliated and flustered at the extreme inappropriateness of being alone with the Earl in nothing but both your night wardrobe, you just couldn’t figure out how to politely flee back to your own room without walking around him.

You stammered “M-my Lord, please forgive me I had trouble sleeping an-and thought to get a glass of warm milk.” ‘Honesty is the best policy!’ your face screwed up into an embarrassed contortion, “Please do pardon and excuse my intrusion, I shall make way and return to my room immediately.”

You lifted a hand to your face and shielded your eyes away from Henry. Making movement to step around his tall form, you took your chance to escape, alas it was all in vain as the Earl’s large hand shot out and stole at your wrist. A high gasp drop from your parted lips. His grip not to rough but stern and strong. He was not making any notion to harm you, just to stop you from leaving his presence.

His warm liquid voice dripped out into your ears “Miss Y/L/N, please wait,” He pleaded in voice, his sapphire eyes mourned “I beg you not to leave under my sudden arrival.”

You bit your lip at the sight of his face- the hardness of his features fell away, replaced by a soft graceful smike as he quietly murmured, “It is not the first time one has found themselves awake in the night within search of Chef Mikkelsen’s delicious biscuits. Will you not sit for a moment with me?” he opened the kitchen door and gestured for you to enter.

You felt a gigantic wave of relief. Though the effects of shock were still attached to your body when all you could reply with was a scared hum.

Henry ventured into the pantry. You ventured around the table in the middle of the kitchen and looked around the spices that hung above the windows.

When his lordship came out with a tin box and two tea saucers, he noticed how his governess was standing in the middle of the kitchen looking rather…lost.

Clearing his throat he gathered your attention, “Miss Y/L/N please, do sit,” gesturing towards the chairs at the kitchen table, and graciously you sat in the chair when he dragged one out.

Laying the tin of biscuits down and placing the saucers in front of you, he fled to the cool room and collected a jug of milk. The stove unfortunately had been put out hours ago and the attempt to reheat it would take longer than desired.

He sighed, “I’m afraid only cold milk is available Miss Y/L/N.” He poured the ivory liquid into a rose painted china tea cup.

“Thank you nonetheless sir,” you politely smiled and accepted the cup into your hand. Laying your lips on the cup, you took a slight sip of the milk.

Your eyes widened, ‘this milk is phenomenon!’ Taking another small sip you hummed happily,

“Your milk must be sweeter here one the Island.”

It was lighter than cream but contained a watery consistency. Something edged the final flavour, it was eerily sweet like sugar or honey. The milk might’ve been cold to the lips but it was surprisingly warm in your belly.

Sitting down in front of you the Lord’s eyes were wide, “You haven’t tasted our milk? After all this time?” he jokingly gasped.

You shook your head. The past many weeks was too hectic for you to simply sit down and have a cup of tea or a glass of milk. You were too concerned for Odette’s wellbeing and support along with the Dalgliesh children’s education.

Your afternoons were busied with the planning of the next day. And even for the past three Sundays, you had caught sleep in bed and made sure your room was tidy and that you were ready for Mrs Sharpe intruding as she was known to do so well.

The callous woman carried all the house keys on a large ring, so despite locking your door, your privacy would still be breeched. Henry threw his head back and laughed.

Your glanced between him and the kitchen door. He was so loud! What if someone saw you like this with him ? It would be the island scandal!

It didn’t matter...

For a man possibly ten to twenty years older than you, he was very charming and boyish; his smile made suddenly made you swoon. You grinned stupidly.

Lord Henry finally settled himself and paused, swallowing down a biscuit, and glanced over at you.

“Will you not have some of the biscuits? They’re sublime,” His long fingers hooked around the edge of the tin and held it out to her.

You shook your head again with all your meek sweetness, “Oh no, my lord, you enjoy it.”

You felt you had overstepped your place and should be humble when it came to his offers.

However a little growl from your middle betrayed your motives.

The Earl let loose another hearty laugh and stole a biscuit to give to you. Biscuit in hand reached out towards you.

Still you refused the offer knowing you should’ve removed yourself from that improper and intimate scenery, you whined “No, my lord, please I ca-“

The Earl smirked and shoved the treat into your talking lips, which caused you to stop midsentence and avoid not choking on the sweet biscuit. A light gag escaped you.

The crumbs rubbed rough on your throat and you wanted to be mad at the Lord but knew not to step that boundary, ‘you got yourself into this mess stupid girl.’

“You’ll come to learn soon that I don’t take to hearing the word ‘No’ kindly Miss Y/L/N.” He flashed her a smile filled with bright whites, proud of his actions.

‘He’s rude and childish!’

A great prickling of hairs on the back of your neck rose up, something was telling you to be afraid of Henry. ‘But he only force fed you a biscuit calm down- if anything be grateful.’

“Now drink the rest of your milk, dear,” he said, pushing the cup up to your crumb covered lips.

You instantly sat back and away from his long claw like fingers, you now just wanted to go back to bed. Sculling down the sweet milk and hastily standing, you moved the chair back into place and waddled over to the sink.

You spoke respectfully but a slight tremble ran through your hands, “I should- um, I think it best I bid you a good night, my lord.”

‘Something is definitely not right, I shouldn’t be here…goodness Y/N don’t be such a scaredy cat!’ you chided yourself. Shaking your head slightly you told yourself firmly, ‘everyone knows full well that the gentry are an odd lot from time to time. He is just being friendly.’

Henry stood to attention and caught you again by the wrist before you could even lay the dishes into the sink. He had excellent aim for wrists it would appear. Providing you his uneasy smirk, he dragged you back in front of him. A single digit cupped your chin and wiped up to your parted gasping lips. Moving his finger away, he deliberately showed you the white spill of sweetness he’d caught on the corner of your mouth. His long tongue flicked out and licked up the drip before completely sucking his finger in front of you.

You gasped. ‘Too friendly, for a man of his standing; is he…with me? No, he can’t be flirting. Great scot girl, get a hold of yourself. Act not like the impute girls of your age, be a mature woman! Goodness! Why would he ever think like that? The man just lost his beloved wife a year ago.’

His hand holding your arm released and dug into the pocket of his over-night coat.

He tutted you softly “Come with me, I have an urgency to question and acquaint myself better with you.”

A hand twirled around your back and softly shoved you forward and guided you into the dark cold drawing room.

‘Is he escorting me back to my living space?’

Suddenly, he froze, his palm left your back and gestured to the lounge. You glanced behind back and up to your employer “Sir?”

“Sit,” he sharply directed followed by a lengthy spaced cough, “Please Miss Y/L/N,” he added “I desire to inquire about the children.”

You blinked under his intense stare, slowly you sat down in the lounge. You slowly drawled, “The children, my lord?”

Sitting down across from you, the Earl rubbed his hands, his brows raised followed by a light chuckle, “Yes Miss Y/L/N, the ones I am paying you to educate?” his fingers laced together.

….Marianne and Michael. So now he showed his care and interest of them?

You flushed and uneasily smiled, you felt like an utter fool, “Of course, my lord. They are doing exceptionally well. They have taken a joy to writing their own stories, they’ve demonstrated great imaginations.”

He didn’t seem too interested in what his children enjoyed that was obvious from his bodily reaction lacking any bright eyes or head perks. “I see...” He bit his lip and sighed, his face lifted to the fireplace. He looked at his portrait and snidely snickered to himself.

Scratching his chin he looked back to you, “Tell me, Miss Y/L/N, are you very tired?”

“Actually, my lord, I-“

“Miss Y/L/N. I have a few brief questions regarding the children, if you do not mind.” He asked as he lit some of the candles with a box of matched from the desk draws.

‘The children, not his children? For a lord he should learn how to speak correctly.’

You gripped the top of your wrapper collar with icy hands and uneasily shuffled. You just wanted to go to bed and sleep, but Henry pursued you further more even after you asked if they might continue the conversation at breakfast in the morning.

He release a wicked chuckled that bewildered you. ‘He’s mad!’

The Earl tossed a leg over one of his knees, he sat back and relaxed, “Now, now, I would prefer to keep this frank, quick and confidential between two adults…”

He turned his head away briefly before he leant forward into your face, his hot breath blew down on your cheeks and eyes as he tilted his head.

His dark eyes turned hot and frightening, he purred, “Do you fear me, Miss Y/L/N?”

As expected if not planned, You lurched back and gasped. Your cheeks heated up. The blue light of the moon shown on his profile. He looked like a painting of Lucifer you’d seen in a children’s bible. His mesmerising features were both terrifying and attractive to you.

You shook your head, trying to stand up straight and tall. You felt silly and embarrassed in yourself for being so flushed.

‘Except…Why would he ask me that? Does he want me to know my place, have I overstepped my glass standings too openly?’ you truly hadn’t meant to upset him enough to try and upset you in return.

“I don’t understand, my lord,” you nervously huffed, “I believed we were talking about Miss

Marianne and Mr Michael?”

You turned your head to the side away from his eyes that squinted and lips that frowned. He moved forward, resting his hands either side of your arms on the lounge. His body heat surrounded you, his banyan and your wrapper folded against each other. Silk against cotton brushing softly.

“S-sir, you come too close, please sit back.”

Henry leant into your ear and hissed in a threatening tone, “Perhaps you will learn to tolerate my ways in time, Miss Y/L/N, as my children learn from you.”

Now you were properly scared. Your chest heaved up and down. He might’ve just as well told you that he was going to throw you down the grand stair case. You were petrified and paralysed.

“Indeed but I beg you to remain civil, I am- I am most happy to inform you of their accomplishments.”

Henry smugly smiled and hummed, leaning away from your unprepared body. He clapped his hands lightly and licked his teeth. He was a hungry looking man, a man looking to conquer in war.

“Yes, I suppose you’re correct Governess,” he continued in his cheerier tone, “We must discuss the children, Miss Y/L/N. Please do tell me of their achievements in your lessons? Do they work hard? I want to hear your curriculum and methods of teaching since you seem to have difficulty understanding respect of your superiors.”

‘Difficulty understanding respect of my superiors?!’

You tightly swallowed and faced him. You wanted to bluntly tell him he was a terrible father and a rude man. Instead, you submissively answered every question he asked. Most questions he asked related to their French lessons, dancing, mathematics and literature.

“Où avez-vous appris à parler français?” Where did you learn to speak French? He asked suddenly in French. It caught you off guard his snap in transition to the language.

You curled your lips in and politely replied, “Mon père m’a appris” my father taught me.

He smirked and his brows raised, he slowly nodded, “Par exemple, un enseignant?” was he a teacher?

You smiled and shook your head. A small flush came to your cheeks

“Il devient marchand et propriétaire terrien.” He was a merchant and landowner, you gently explained. Your father was a travelling man and left he farm and cottage to you and your mother while he was away. And when your mother died, you took care of little Odette and father remained to work a little more in England instead of sailing off for months to India and China.

You felt your mouth grow incredibly dry and your lips numb. Your vision became spotty and the room swayed. You tried to stand to your feet and almost fell over onto him again like you had this morning.

“Je m’excuse,” you weakly slurred, “je suis fatiguée.” Excuse me, I am very tired.

You needed to go to bed. It was far too late for this meeting in the night that could wait till the morning.

Just before you could tell him any of this, your eyes rolled to the back of your head. You fell ungracefully to the floor and weakly collapsed.

The earl smiled while whispering ‘timber’ with a tiny whistle and left you to fall hard, but winced at the loud thud. Your wrapper tie became loose and fell away to reveal your scantily clad night gown.

You were still awake. Unable to move unable to understand what was happening. Why your body would not rise and why you were just so incredibly tired. The last thing you saw was the earls looming shadowing silhouette and his deep voice humming a familiar tune.

"How many miles to Babylon..." He smiled and cocked his head to the side as he watched your poor confused gaze flutter shut.

With your eyes closed and your lips parted and your arms perfectly lain above your head, he believe you were a grand depiction of a goddess offering her life to a sacrifice.

He dug into the pocket of his banyan again, while this time he pulled out a tiny vial the size of his thumb. Henry hummed the merry lullaby as he twirled it around his fingers. It was just too easy to slip it into something as milk.

"How many miles to Babylon? Three more miles and ten. Can I get there by candle-light?" He smirked, "No and ne'er again."

He believed it to be remarkable that you would fall unconscious so easily under the influence of his drug induced milk. He worried you would cease sipping after your exclamation on the sweetness.

While poor little you was trusting him to be a gentleman…but it was part of that old scally-wag Colin Fowler’s plan, sending the girl here to be his governess.

London, England 1888, Saturday 14th January. 19:03pm.

Yes, it was now time for the Earl of Jersey to return home to his estate of Radier Manor.

He buried his face into his hands and sighed, before plucking up the unopened envelope by his desk. From the side of his desk Henry ripped open a draw and collected a letter pen. Cutting the mail open, he plucked out the parchment and glued his eyes to the words that lay before him.

My dear friend Henry Dalgliesh,

It has been over a year since your dear Natalia passed and from our last meeting you had asked whether I could provide you one of my girls for your taste in desire. I wonderfully inform you that I have discovered something much more exceedingly pleasurable in the realm of succulent kittens, consider it a gift for the favour I owed you.

I have come across two young ladies from a small farm down south, they’re virgins and as pure as snow they come. Their names are Y/N and Odette Y/L/N from Bristol. Little Odette, I will be keeping under my hand for a few more years as the dear is not ripe yet only eleven or twelve I believe; the cusp of womanhood my friend, but her older sister; a true English rose is perfect for the reaping. After the misfortune of their father’s death whom was a gambling friend of mine, the girls are in a river of debt.

For every month I will expect a “payment” from Y/N to “support her sister” despite us both knowing I don’t really need anything to care for the little dear. I suggest you use the debt against her.

Do teach the girl some manners Henry, she’s polite and innocent but completely lacking in true submission. Make her cry, beg, squeal- break her, bend her, fuck her; whatever you do, don’t kill her. Henry, do not waste my gift, use her as you want and give her back when you’re finished. I have sent her your way as a governess for your children. She should be there in a week. Sincerely,

Lord C.F.

Henry sat back and proceeded to scrunch up the news into a ball of paper, casting it into the fire. He watched the flames engulf and swallow down the evidence of his ever interesting desire. He smirked and looked back up to the painting of Natalia and laughed at her face.

“I look forward to a nice new toy darling, don’t you?” Henry threw his feet up onto his desk and folded his hands behind his head, “I am sure you do, bloody harlot.” His eyes gleamed yellow as hellfire in the reflection of the burning letter.

Yes, it was now time for the Earl of Jersey to return home to his estate of Radier Manor.

Radier Manor Jersey, England 1888, Monday 9Th April. 22:28 pm.

“That worked rather well, bit too quickly for my liking though, however extremely effective,” He muttered to himself as he pocketed it back and bent onto one knee to hover above you.

His eyes travelled your the lines of your form that he was observing from the moment he discovered your shy presence around the estates home.

He slid closer, pressing his nose to your forehead to inhale the sweet scent or your hair and skin. His eyes fluttered as his lips gasped, his cock twitched. He caressed your soft cheek with his knuckled. His eyes scanning down to your entrapped bosom.

‘I wonder if she would taste better than she smells.’

With a solidary eye to the open area down through the drawing room into the dining room, he sighed and drew you closer. If anyone caught him, he would kill them. His hand softly rubbed your forehead, which cause you to react in a subtle moan.

‘Could she be as innocent as she seemed? Is this a mistake? Should I still do this?’ Henry dared ask himself. His eyes narrowed and he consi-

- Wait… Excuse me? Hello, reader, are you holding onto hope he’s gracious and kind? It’s because you think those are Henry’ thoughts don’t you? Well, I’m afraid you’re dearly mistaken. You see, it isn’t one of those stories....romance, no; here we feed on lust, blood and blackmail. Now that’s been cleared up, back to the story, where were we? He scares you, he drugs you, ah yes here we are-

Henry tucked his hands and arms beneath your fragile body and lifted you up onto his hip, his lust pressing harshly into your waist. He blew out the candle and fled. You were his prize being glided to the forbidden room, the room he considered very special indeed.....

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