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am-i-the-asshole-official · 8 months

Note

aita for being asexual?

ok this is a long one, my apologies in advance

i (29f) have been in a relationship with my husband (28m) for 5 years, married for 1.

i am a sex-repulsed asexual and deeply opposed to getting pregnant (but not opposed to having kids!). i told my husband this on our fifth date, and then again over text after our seventh date. oddly specific? yes, but those were two of the most terrifying moments of my life, so i remember them very well hahaha

anyway, husband decided i was worth it, and we got serious. 2 years ago, i proposed, and between cake tastings and wedding prep, we started talking about kids in the short term.

i was (and am) still very opposed to me getting pregnant, so our options were adoption or surrogacy. i was leaning towards adoption, whereas my husband was leaning towards surrogacy.

i talked about this with my best friend, who said surrogacy would be great! she would even be the surrogate mother for us! and so, i was convinced.

wedding happened, honeymoon happened, we got back, and then started the IVF process. embryo took, yay!

as my best friend's pregnancy progressed, she and my husband became good friends. they were already friendly, but they got close between late night craving runs and doctor's appointments. i thought it was amazing! the two (and a half) most important people in my life got along well. i was absolutely delighted.

and then i left for a work trip.

these trips happen often, at least once every two months. this trip was supposed to be three days. third day started at 8 AM and ended at noon, but i was able to get away, and was home by 9 AM. i walked into MY apartment. walked into MY bedroom, expecting to find MY husband sleeping in MY bed, so i could surprise him.

instead, i found my husband and my very pregnant (32 weeks) best friend engaging in the horizontal tango. the devil's dance. creating the beast with two backs. bear with me, i am attempting to find humour in my pain.

anyway, this was almost 3 weeks ago. i immediately kicked them both out and have been alone at home for that long.

i . . . I don't know what to do. apparently this affair has been going on for almost as long as my husband and i have been together. i feel like it's my fault. i should have just given in and given my husband what he wanted. is this my fault? and what do i do when my best friend gives birth?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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yayakoishii · 6 months

Text

Type | Sanji x Reader

Fandom: One Piece

Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x Reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Genre: Angst with Happy Ending

Warning(s): Alcohol consumption, drunken confessions

Inspired by: Your Type by Carly Rae Jepsen

Summary: You know you're not Sanji's type. Yet you also can't bring yourself to get over him. Consoling yourself with alcohol doesn't go as planned...

A/n: I'm done with Sanji fics, I say. Then I proceed to write a Sanji fic because I'm so in love with this boy it's ridiculous. Apparently all it takes is one reminder of why I love him and I'm a puddle for him again. Probably why a lot of my fics have so many compliments for him. I always want him to know how amazing he is hahaha~

also available on ao3!

The big bonfire had plunged everyone in a golden and orange hue, the warmth in the atmosphere lingering from the aftermath of another island successfully saved (and destroyed) by the Straw Hat crew. In one corner, Sanji was flirting with some girls, who were looking at him shyly and hanging on with great interest.

Somehow, it didn't feel as good as always. The blonde chef found his mind instead conjuring up your sweet smile and a giggle. Flirting with you was different. Somehow, it was the only time he felt giddy now-a-days. It was weird, but Sanji wasn't an idiot to not understand what it meant.

He knew he was falling for you and yet, he was also aware that his heart had chosen an impossible target. You were the most kind, generous and sweet person he had ever come across– and there was no way you would ever look at him as a potential partner. Sanji knew that, his brain knew that, but his heart was adamant. It has chosen and it refused to let go.

Giving up to its whims again, the chef excused himself from the ladies, who looked disappointed and tried to make him stay but he gently refused by giving some excuse and a compliment. Feeling eyes on him, Sanji looked around to find you shooting him a glare. It startled him, especially when he noticed the glass of alcohol in your hand.

You hated the bitter taste of alcohol. You never drank it and always refused it so what could have made you drink today? Sanji couldn't understand but he found his feet making way towards you the moment you swayed where you sat. His hands found purchase upon your shoulders when he was close enough and he steadied you such that you were leaning against his stomach.

You inhaled deeply, almost like you were taking in Sanji's scent, and it made a shiver run down his back.

"Sanji…" Your voice was a mere whisper in the din of the party but somehow, it reached Sanji's ears. "Take me home."

Home meant your room in the Thousand Sunny, a place Sanji had never stepped foot in. He had, at times, escorted you to the door but never went in and you had never offered either– it seemed like he would intrude on your personal space if he ever asked.

"Of course," he said quietly, carefully helping you to stand up. You never drank, but now that you had, Sanji wasn't sure if you had drunk too much or if you were a lightweight because you nearly collapsed again, giggles bubbling up your lips.

"My legs feel like jelly," you slurred towards the end, putting all your weight on Sanji, who easily held you up as you tried to straighten up. "Jelly… Milk pudding… ah, your milk pudding the other night was so good, Sanji."

"I'm glad to hear that, sweetheart," he patiently let you struggle for a while before you gave up and looked at him with tears in your eyes. Your mood swings were extreme when you got drunk, apparently. "How about I carry you back, my love?"

"Would you?" You peered up at him through your wet eyelashes and Sanji wanted to kiss your tears away. Even while crying, you were somehow the most beautiful sight with your adorable red nose, the flush of alcohol making your ears and neck and cheeks warm, droplets sticking to your eyelashes.

Without a word, he picked you up like you weighed nothing in a princess carry, and you squeaked at the sudden dizziness. Your arms automatically came to circle around his neck and Sanji hoped that you wouldn't be able to hear his heart hammering at such a close distance. You were pressed against him, and he could feel you– it was too much for his heart and he really didn't want to let you know how much of a big fat crush he had on you, lest it embarrassed him in front of you.

To you, he always wanted to appear like a cool, suave and charming guy. And yet, when you were around, he always ended up fumbling or stuttering or messing things up. The effect you had on him drove him crazy.

"You're so cool," you murmured, your lips tickling his collarbone from where they were pressed. "Your hands are always cold, did you know that, Sanji?"

"Yes," the chef smiled to himself, watching you draw hearts with your finger on his shirt. You were pouting again. "Is everything alright, love?"

"Mm?" You looked up at him, eyes wide and glossy.

"You never drink," Sanji gestured his head back towards the party, which was now quite a distance away that the noise had dwindled down. In the silence of the night, the moment felt all too personal and intimate. "Did something happen?"

"I got tired," you whispered, pausing from drawing hearts. You looked away, warm tears running down your cheeks. "It's been a bit hard these days. Love is hard, Sanji."

Sanji's heart skipped a beat at the last sentence. You were in love?

"I know I shouldn't," you continued on, no longer looking at him but at the starry sky above you, "that my feelings will just ruin everything. I know I'm not his type, and I know he will never look at me the way I want him to. I know he will only ever see me as a friend at most but God, if I just didn't love him as much I do. I want to do so many things with him, for him, to him– I want to be by his side and love him."

"He is a very lucky man," Sanji's mouth felt dry as he spoke. The food he had eaten suddenly seemed to want to come out the way it had come in and Sanji was sure that the only reason he hadn't puked yet was because you were in his arms. You, who were in love with some other man. Probably someone from the crew. (Was it Zoro? Sanji never actually hated the guy, despite his claims, but he felt like he really might resent him a little if the mosshead was the one receiving your affections.)

"Is he?" Your voice wavered. "He won't ever look at me that way. It kills me when I see him with other girls because I know he will never see me beyond a comrade because that's just how it is. I'm not, I'm not the type of girl he would fall for."

"He must be blind then," Sanji said loudly. You had reached the Sunny and got onto the deck, but he simultaneously wanted this conversation to end and not end. Who was it you liked? Zoro didn't flirt. Was it Ussop? He sometimes fooled around. "To not notice you, to not, to not realise your value." To not realise that he was a lucky bastard who got your love when Sanji would do anything for it. Anything. "W- Who…"

Sanji swallowed the lump in his throat before trying again.

"Who is he?"

You didn't answer for a few seconds. He tried to gauge out your reaction and found that you looked angry. Your mood swings were really extreme.

"I hate you," you hit Sanji's chest without any real power in it. The words were like a slap to Sanji, who looked at you heart-broken. You were angry, but you were still crying. "I wish I could mean that. I wish I could look at you and not constantly feel so in love with you. I wish you were mean or horrible or a jerk so I could get over you but you're, you're kind. You're sweet. You treat me like I'm the most precious and important person to grace the earth. You comfort me and you hold me and you flirt but never force anything on me. You're a gentleman, you're caring and I see you. I see who you are and I fall in love. I'm sorry, Sanji, I love you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for ruining everything, for taking advantage of your kindness, but I can't make it stop. I can't–"

You sucked in a deep breath, scratching at Sanji to let him let you down. The chef did so, too shocked to say or do anything else.

"I can't look at you and not love you, Sanji," you whispered, eyes reflecting a broken and sad look. "I'm sorry I love you."

For a few seconds he didn't know what to say, brain trying to catch up with everything you had said. Him. You loved him. Not someone else, him.

You seemed to take his silence as your answer and turned around to leave but Sanji panicked and tugged at your hand, making you bump into his chest. His hands came around you in a circle, holding you with a desperation he didn't know he had in him.

"Don't be," he said breathlessly, feeling winded from the rush of his own feelings and thoughts. "Don't be sorry for making my dream come true, not when all I have wanted is for you to love me back. And don't be sorry for entrusting your heart to me. I swear, sweetheart, if you would let me, I'll take so good care of it. I'll never let you regret it. So please, give me your heart. Because I already gave you mine without either of us knowing."

You chuckled, the daze of having your love returned making everything feel unreal. You turned around and got on your tiptoes to press a soft kiss against his lips.

"Silly boy, it was always yours to begin with."

Sanji's heart was still hammering as he looked at you giving him a sweet smile and pulling him into a hug. You stayed like that for a few minutes, just the two of you under the stars on an empty ship, swaying lightly to inaudible music. A few moments passed before Sanji realised that your breath was evened out– you had fallen asleep in his arms.

That made him laugh, looking at your peaceful and smiling face burrowed in his chest, right next to his heart. Remembering what you had said before, Sanji carefully tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, and pressed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

"Then silly girl, you should know you were always my exact type, to begin with."

°•❀•°

Taglist:

all likes, comments, reblogs are appreciated ♡

#one piece #one piece imagines #one piece fanfic #one piece fanfiction #vinsmoke sanji #vinsmoke sanji x reader #sanji x reader #one piece x reader #black leg sanji #op sanji #gender neutral reader #every sanji fic i write is just me trying to put my feelings for him into words

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fanby-fckry · 2 months

Text

🕸️ angie-fluffy-bootz Follow

24 min. ago

time sensitive question how flirt boy

🕸️ angie-fluffy-bootz Follow

2 min. ago

thanks guys

#the fucking radio demon parody account replied to my post #with extremely UNHELPFUL advice #and charlie #is ur advice unisex? #bcuz if thats how you got vaggie #im judging you both #irl source

( 697 notes )

⚪️ Anonymous said

r u dead?

📻 real-radio-demon Follow

4 hr. ago

Ha! Bold of you to assume I can be killed :)

📻 real-radio-demon Follow

4 hr. ago

Show your face and per’’haps,’,’. I’ll come~.to you

🎀 charlies-angel Follow

32 min. ago

This account is fake. Nobody knows where Alastor is, anon. Stop wasting your time.

#this parody account is in really poor taste

( 14,581 notes )

🕸️ angie-fluffy-bootz Follow

Jul 1

if I make it outta this alive, I’m gonna tell my crush I’m in love with him.

🕸️ angie-fluffy-bootz Follow

Jul 1

fuck

🕸️ angie-fluffy-bootz Follow

1 hr. ago

ya know, I don’t think I’ve confessed to someone and meant it in over a decade?

🕸️ angie-fluffy-bootz Follow

53 min. ago

haha would it be crazy if I said I forgot how?

#its literally part of my job to flirt with people #then i catch feelings and suddenly #i get all tongue-tied #i cant fall back on my old scripts either #he hates bullshit #he wants me #the real me #but the real me doesnt know how to do this!!!

( 268 notes )

💀 be-gay-do-crym Follow

2 hr. ago

apparently people are canceling @.niffty-lady ? wtf?

🌕 m00nlight-h0wling Follow

1 hr. ago

they are and it’s actually the stupidest thing i’ve ever seen

#and the bar was really fucking low #considering the amount of dumb chaotic bullshit my dad gets into ↯ #niffty lady

( 22 notes )

👓 creepz0 Follow

3 hr. ago

It’s time to CANCEL @.niffty-lady

Here’s why:

Niffty LITERALLY KILLED a man in cold blood and now PROFITS off of his death

This so-called “lady” is INCREDIBLY rude to fans, ignoring requests leaving fans on read and answering asks with a NASTY attitude. NOT very lady-like if you ask me

Is associated with the VERY PROBLEMATIC @.real-radio-demon (self explanatory)

Writes TOXIC and PROBLEMATIC ships (spidermoth, radiohusk, reylo 🤢)

Writes NSFW when she herself is CHILD-CODED

PROOF is under the cut ⬇️

. Keep reading

#callout post ↯ #niffty lady #anti niffty lady #niffty critical

( 5,101 notes )

📻 real-radio-demon Follow

3 hr. ago

Despite popular belief, I am not dead!

Well, not any deader than I’ve been since 1933! Hahaha!

↯ #is alastor dead? #ha! no ↯ #alastor the radio demon #real radio demon broadcasts

( 147,381 notes )

⚪️ Anonymous said

isn’t it disrespectful to write fics about someone you killed irl?

🪡 niffty-lady Follow

4 hr. ago

I have no respect for Adam. Hope this helps! <3

#answered ask #anon ask

( 136,247 notes )

📺 voxblr4k Follow

5 hr. ago

Is the radio demon dead?

. 96,460 votes • remaining time 6 days, 19 hours

#polls ↯ #alastor the radio demon ↯ #is alastor dead?

( 19,292 notes )

🪡 niffty-lady Follow

6 hr. ago

Forbidden Fruit

Adam x Reader | 10k words | Rated E

⚠️ Major Character Death

Tags: Smut, Whump, Sinner Reader, Forbidden Love, Bad Ending

After a night of reckless passion, you quickly became Archangel Adam’s favorite sin. Your love, as forbidden as the fruit of Eden, was destined to end in tragedy.

https://archiveofoursouls.hell/works/63595697

#niffty lady fic #adam x reader #angel x sinner #sinner reader #smut #whump #forbidden love #bad ending #rpf #aoos link #aoos fanfic

( 49,933 notes )

📻 real-radio-demon Follow

6 hr. ago

Well, it looks like I’ve got some time on my hands!

I’m sure many of you have burning questions you’d like answered

So, ask. me. any’,thing. :)

#ask me anything #ama ↯ #alastor the radio demon #real radio demon broadcasts

( 16,628 notes )

🐍 x-hiss-lord-x Follow

Dec 12, 2019

i can't have beef with the power of friendship trope because if someone wanted to hang out with me i'd probably reconsider my stance on turning the city into the 10th circle of hell

🐍 x-hiss-lord-x Follow

Dec 12, 2019

besides i can always just redirect my dark urges towards being violently protective of my new friends. there's no rule that says you can't do that.

🌈 hells-disney-princess Follow

7 hr. ago

I found Sir Pentious’s old voxblr blog, and I think I’m gonna cry

🌈 hells-disney-princess Follow

7 hr. ago

He made the ultimate sacrifice to protect his friends and the hotel during the extermination. He did exactly what he said he would in this post.

I wish I could thank him for everything he did for us. And I wish I could’ve done a better job of protecting him.

I don’t know where Souls go when they get erased; I don’t know if they go anywhere at all. But I hope that wherever Sir Pentious is now, he’s with people that he considers his friends.

#rip Sir Pentious #we miss you #irl source

( 348 notes )

📻 real-radio-demon Follow

8 hr. ago

↯ #alastor the radio demon #real radio demon broadcasts #the ink spots #we’ll meet again #Voxify

( 4,102 notes )

⬜️ voxblr-meta Follow

9 hr. ago

Fanby’s Fake Dash Masterpost

#meta #fake tumblr dash

( 3 notes )

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lixtokki · 2 years

Text

i've never done that before

pairing: chan x reader (afab) word count: 2.0k rating: 18+ warnings: pussy eating. fingering. squirting!!!!! you watch porn tgt for a bit. dirty talking (as usual). a/n: hahaha. im just a chan-smut machine at this point. i'll proofread this at some point i swear

watching porn with chan’s head perched upon your shoulder, his chest touching your back, his semi pushed gently against your ass was… a different experience than what you were used to. not bad — no, definitely not bad. being completely honest, you were a little embarrassed, showing chan the things you watched when no one else was around. and he was pretty taken aback at the library of bookmarks you’d amassed. so much filth. he could barely believe it.

“you are fucking filthy.” he said, snatching the phone out of your hand, opting to scroll through the smut with his own thumbs instead. you make a feeble attempt to stop him.

“i’m embarrassed,” you whine, “let me do it.” but he keeps the phone firm in his grasp, thumbing through your dirty little secrets. a lot of the videos are full of things that don’t surprise him, things he’s done to you, done with you. there’s an unsurprising surplus of pussy eating videos, and he has to chuckle into your ear.

“wonder what your favourite is.” he sniggers, pressing a chaste kiss against your neck. finally deciding on a video to watch to completion, he taps a pussy eating video and turns the volume up, well aware that you enjoy the noises that accompany the act.

“so interesting to see what you watch when i’m not available,” he continues, “you ever gotten off to this video?”

embarrassed, you nod your head and squeeze your thighs together, the combination of chan’s breath on your neck and the video playing in front of you proving to be too much for your pussy to handle.

“yeah?” chan says, pushing his dick against your ass, grinding you ever so lightly, “my babygirl is so dirty when i’m not around.”

you shake your head. no, no. but how are you to deny it when chan is sitting here, browsing through your personals while your shorts dampen at the mere feeling of his clothed dick pressing up against you. your attention flutters back to the video, the video you’ve seen so many times before — you know what’s coming and you’re curious for chan’s reaction.

the amateur video comes to a close with the guy sucking the girls clit like a champion, two fingers expertly drilling into her until she cums everywhere, squirting all over the guys face until he’s drenched. he doesn’t stop tonguing her, mouth open, willing, desperate to taste.

behind you, chan hums curiously. “wasn’t expecting that,” he says, letting your phone drop onto the bed, “have you… ever done that?”

“never,” you tell him honestly. you aren’t sure you’re even capable of it. “apparently it’s hard to do it.”

unbeknownst to you, chan’s eyebrow cocks upwards in surprise; you’ve accidentally prepositioned him with a challenge. “is that so?” he asks with a smirk, his free hand finding a coveted spot on your thigh. he presses tender little circles into your skin and, above, he sinks his teeth into your neck, only lightly, not hard enough to leave a mark but enough for you to let the smallest whimper escape your mouth.

“mm,” chan continues, dragging his tongue across the freshly bitten expanse of skin, “would be so. fucking. hot. if you could do that for me.”

“wan’ squirt for you, chan.” you say, your voice meek and small, “want you to be the only one who can make me squirt.”

and, oh, how you’ve tripped one of chan’s switches with that line. he growls against you, his fingers quickly finding your clit through your pyjama shorts, rubbing harsh circles into your most sensitive spot. “you wanna squirt all for me, babygirl?” he asks, his tone dripping in condescension. all you can do is nod your head and push your ass further against his rock hard cock that was making quite the space for itself under chan’s grey sweatpants.

suddenly, chan breaks contact with you, sitting up in bed and laying you on your back. he drags his gaze up and down your body, taking in the view of you, all the way from your clenched thighs to your reddened cheeks.

“god. i wanna fucking devour you right now.” chan breathes out, his tone low and serious. he tugs the waistband of your shorts down and down, scoffing when he discovers you aren’t wearing underwear. “wow.” he says flatly, “you’re practically begging for me to eat your pussy at this point.”

with words failing you, all you can muster is weakly thrusting your cunt upwards, hoping chan will be merciful enough to take the hint.

wishful thinking, of course. “words, babygirl.” he commands, softly.

“want channie to eat— eat my pussy.” you whine, kicking your legs expectantly. “please.”

his response only comes in the form of a pleased chuckle. he tugs your shorts completely off, admiring the view of your exposed cunt. “this?” he teases, sliding his thumb through your folds before flicking at your clit, “you want me to eat this?”

“please. please. please.” you rut against his thumb, his pace too slow for your liking. it only spurs you on more when he laughs. “please, i want channie’s tongue on my cunt. please.”

“okay, babygirl.” he relents, taking his hand away from you only to slide his slick covered thumb into his own mouth, sucking your essence and fucking loving it. “fuck. you taste amazing.”

before you can beg for his mouth to be elsewhere, chan repositions himself between your legs, hooking your knees over his shoulders, holding you in place by your thighs.

when a few seconds pass of nothing, you rock towards chan’s face, far too impatient for his teasing tonight. he laughs and you feel his breath ghost against your poor, neglected cunt. then, his tongue finds your clit and your nerves explode like hot glass. you curb the urge to scream — it’s too early for that, right? and instead bite down on your bottom lip, a low moan sticks in your throat.

chan merely teases you at first, his tongue drawing slow lines up and down, up and down, trailing down from your clit to your opening… and back up again. he gathers your slick with his tongue and spreads it all throughout your folds, happily swallowing a few mouthfuls as he goes. he spreads your thighs open a little more, presenting more of your pussy to him, and wraps his lips around your delicate little clit, knowing he’s done the right thing when you attempt to squeeze your thighs together, effectively trapping his face flush against you.

“right here?” he asks, his voice muffled by your wet heat.

“right there, right there!” you cry back, rocking your pussy against his mouth.

“god you’re eager.” chan quipped, pulling his mouth away from you, replacing it with his thumb, “y’could probably cum just from my mouth, couldn’t you?”

you choke out some sort of noise in agreement, a whine, a groan, something like that — whatever it is, it seems to placate chan. you wrench your eyes open, keen to meet his gaze. looking down, chan is already looking up at you, a half-lidded gaze and a mouth covered in your mess peer back at you.

keeping the eye contact, he brings his lips to you once again, swirling your clit around with his tongue. two of his fingers tease the entrance to your cunt, spreading your juices anywhere that isn’t already completely coated. “hmm,” he hums against you, the vibrations against your clit send your head flying backwards into the pillow below, “you want me inside?”

“yes, yes please.” you whimper, “inside. you. want you inside.”

god, does it drive chan fucking crazy when you talk for him; he grins wide against your pussy and slides two fingers straight inside you, curving into your form as soon as he’s knuckle deep. your body responds the way it always does when chan has his fingers stuffed in you, you writhe and wriggle and toss your head back — something about his fingers hit different compared to his dick, maybe it was the expert way his fingers can independently pound you from all sorts of new angles. either way, you are nothing but a shrieking mess underneath him, you rut your cunt against his face, at this point, he’s barely moving his mouth, letting you do all the work. fucking his face like your life depended on it.

“my gosh,” chan says, “look how good you fuck my face. you’ve made the biggest mess.”

and you continue, embarrassed but far too turned on to stop now. you push your pussy flush against chan’s full, slicked lips and grind him, the feeling of him smiling against you fucking destroying you inside and out. you can already feel the orgasm knotting in your stomach. painstakingly, you slow your ruts down to a, somewhat, leisurely pace. though it’s hard to keep any modicum of self-control when chan feels that good. you attempt, at any rate, and let chan’s fingers work you towards your orgasm. which shouldn’t take too long now that chan has found that one fucking spot inside you that has you screeching like a banshee.

it feels like there’s fireworks going off inside you as chan mercilessly pounds your g-spot with every ounce of strength he has. your clit is long forgotten now, as chan is focused, directing all of his attention to you making you cum around his fingers, just like this. sweat beads along his brow bone, and he even starts grunting himself — it’s only then you notice he’s been humping his dick against the bed below him for god knows how long now.

“chan. i feel— i feel funny,” you cry out, a familiar feeling reaches your core, but it’s tinged with an unfamiliar strangeness, “i’m. i’m close, i’m close but—”

“baby. let go.” chan coos, fucking his fingers straight against your g-spot. when did he add a third? “can do you do that for me? can baby let go and cum, just for channie?”

your hesitation melts away with chan’s soothing voice. you grip onto the bed sheets underneath and brace your body for what feels like an orgasm that could break the richter scale. the orgasm bounds toward you at fucking lightning speed after hearing him ask so nicely and suddenly — you’re overcome. your eyes see nothing but stars. and an almighty scream bounces off every wall in the bedroom. you hear chan moan too and glance down, through your haze to see your pussy drenching every inch of his face — and he doesn’t stop fingering you, not yet, not whilst you’re still soaking him. the bed goes damp underneath you, and you’re so embarrassed but you can’t halt this orgasm, not even for the world ending.

chan rubs and rubs your g-spot until you’re emptied of every drop, his mouth hanging open the whole time, happy to taste anything you can offer him. when he pulls his sodden fingers out, you cross your legs immediately and let out a shaky, pleasured sob. chan quirks his head at you, darting to your side at once.

“babygirl,” he whispers, tugging you into his arms so you can bury your head in his armpit, “baby. you ok?”

you nod against him. “embarrassed.” comes your tiny response. and he laughs endearingly.

“you’re okay though, right?” he asks again. his tone a little more serious. he kisses your forehead and begins massaging circles in your shoulders.

“‘m fine,” you say sleepily, inhaling long draws of chan’s post-sex scent. your favourite. and you fall asleep there and then, cocooned against chan’s thick body, body covered in all sorts of fluids.

chan looks you up and down, then he looks to the huge damp patch on the bed. he makes a shitty attempt to wipe some of you off his face before sighing in defeat. “i’ll clean this up later.”

#bangchan x reader #skz x reader #bang chan x reader #bangchan smut #skz smut #cham #mine

2K notes · View notes

suzukiblu · 6 months

Note

Ground Zero Den Mom? for one of WIP Wednesday options??

I didn't actually have any of this written yet, tbh, so I just started the fic outright for you, I guess, hahaha. Self-restraint? What's that??

Black Zero is having the single stupidest argument of his entire life.

“So, uh, anyway we fixed the problem,” his most annoying still-living alternate self says, then gestures illustratively at him. “Also, meet the problem. Black Zero, this is the Justice League. Justice League, Black Zero.”

“‘Black Zero’?” Superman repeats, looking bewildered. “Like the clone liberation movement?”

“Exactly like that, but with a lot more reality-conquering and murder we apparently decided was ethically okay because we just cloned everyone we killed,” Superboy says, looking mildly embarrassed. “Uh. So like, he's me, obviously. Well, I guess he could've been Match, but Match doesn't really have, you know, like . . . that much get-up-and-go, I guess?”

“Who's Match?” Black Zero asks, eyeing Superman calculatingly. He's never actually met a version of the man, but he'd expected someone more impressive, honestly.

“Oh,” Superboy says. “Uh, well, he was cloned from me, so my slightly murderous little brother, basically? Sometimes he tries to fuck up my life and kill me because the assholes who made him have him convinced that he's their property and doesn't have any free will to live his own damn life with, which in retrospect is not information I should've given specifically you, huh.”

“Depends on how fast you want your little brother out from under the assholes who made him,” Black Zero says, pushing up his glasses to narrow his eyes down at him.

“. . . hm,” Superboy says, frowning consideringly. “Actually, uh–”

“Kon-El,” Superman says, looking pained. “Please explain what's happening here.”

“Could we maybe go fuck up the Agenda first?” Superboy asks hopefully.

“Please tell me you don't answer to Superman,” Black Zero says, pinching the bridge of his nose. “And why is he calling you ‘Kon-El’?”

“Because that's my name, asshole,” Superboy says, making a face at him.

“You picked Superman to be your father?” Black Zero demands in exasperation, and Superboy immediately turns bright red.

“Oh my god, you moron, Superman's not my dad!” he sputters. “He's like, a co-worker! Anyway, you picked Westfield, you don't have any room to talk about shitty taste in fake parents!”

Black Zero spares a moment for the crushing weight of the grief, then shoots the kid a flat look.

“Paul Westfield was my father,” he says.

“Please tell me he didn't name you,” Superboy says, looking disgusted. Black Zero eyes him in exasperation. Why is every other version of him an annoying teenager who doesn't know when to shut the fuck up? There couldn't have been at least one more adult? Just one, in all of Hypertime?

“Only if you count the ‘Superman’ phase,” he says. “I took Black Zero for myself.”

“That's incredibly depressing,” Superboy mutters. Black Zero idly considers murdering him, but there wouldn't be much point beyond personal satisfaction and he doesn't feel like fighting half the local Justice League first thing into this reality either.

Give it a week, maybe.

#kon el #conner kent #superboy #black zero #rinfic #wip: den mom black zero

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inchidentally · 3 months

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I dreamed that there was a misunderstanding between Lando and Oscar, which turned into rough sex and then an apology. I don't know if anyone would want to write fan fiction based on it.

anon I've been mulling this over and going through multiple scenarios! but I find it impossible to go the full rough sex over a misunderstanding w those two bc my hc Lando doesn't give even a whiff of aggression during sex and Oscar would never be the type to let his aggression slip out uncontrolled - I can only imagine it like in fics where it's established relationship and negotiated kinks etc.

absolutely if someone else sees this idea and feels inspired then lmk!

BUT ! I did write something in my shitty sort of a fic sort of just an expanded idea style - idk if it will suffice?

I thought of like media duties at the start of a race weekend in Vegas 2024 and they have a group of drivers at a bar for a Q&A - crucially it must include Daniel, Carlos and ofc Lando and Oscar.

to kick things off, the Sky team have a makeshift bar set up on the small stage and have the drivers taking shots and having the other drivers try to guess what they're drinking (water, vodka, tequila) they've made sure to include far more shots of water bc they're not wanting the drivers so loose that things get out of hand around fans with their phones up.

except Lando hates the taste of tequila or vodka so he makes a face and pushes his shots over to Oscar begging him to down them instead, which of course Oscar gamely does. it's too late when he hears the tougher guys sputtering bc damn, whatever that tequila was it was definitely too strong. Will Buxton is hahaha good jokes but very awkwardly bc genuinely some of the guys are struggling. Oscar is red in the face and coughing and Lando is laughing but kinda feels bad. they decide to move on from the shots challenge before anyone's gone multiple rounds bc dinner was only an hour before and group vomiting isn't what the fans stumped up several hundred each for.

ironically it ends up that the rest of the guys can swagger through the tipsiness but Oscar's famed self-control decides to drop just one barrier. and it's with his hands concerning Lando. the drivers are now doing stupid challenges with decks of cards and magic tricks and shit and ofc Lando is the favorite person for them all to get paired with and Oscar starts to get weirdly… rowdy about it?? Daniel and Carlos are as usual shoving Lando around and using their hands on him a lot and Oscar is sort of half-joking half-aggressively heckling them to fahck off. Lando starts sputtering and his eyes are bugging out bc Oscar never swears where there's fans and since when is he this loud ?? fortunately everyone finds it hysterical when Oscar finally barges in when Daniel gets too touchy-feely and Oscar bodily wrenches Lando away and back to the barstools set up on the far side of the stage. he sits down and tugs Lando back against him, between his legs. hahaha so funny! nobody knows Oscar's at half mast against Lando's lower back so everyone else can just laugh!

at first, Carlos and Daniel are doubled over cackling and the whole thing seems like a hilarious teammate jealousy bit. Oscar is nowhere near drunk but apparently any level of tipsy has him absently pushing a hand up the hem of Lando's shirt and mumbling nonsense into the hair at Lando's temple. it's infuriatingly hot and Lando has to fight every cell in his body to keep pretending to laugh and not just melt into Oscar finally doing what Lando's been silently begging for for what, a year and a half?? except it's in front of fans and their friends and god knows how many cameras and Lando can only keep the smile hitched on his face and keep tugging Oscar's hands away from his nipples and the hem of his boxers. Daniel is doing his best work selling it as a gag but Carlos keeps catching Lando's eyes and seeing the little twist of the knife each time Oscar's mouth smiles hot and pleased against Lando's head.

Lando can't decide if he's relieved or in agony when it's time for them to move to the autograph tables. it means Oscar will be able to drink water and sober up, but it also means breaking the daydream he'd drifted into of Oscar's hands being at home on Lando's body. of Oscar holding him just like that all the time, and not just because he happens to be a handsy drunk. he can blame his usual shyness around crowds for staying fairly mum as he scribbles his name over and over, safely positioned between Daniel and Liam who are loud enough for anything. Carlos seems to have corralled Oscar into the purgatory of being dead last at the table where fans hover awkwardly on one side, and Carlos himself on the other. Lando doesn't see - 'on purpose' - that Carlos is able to steer Oscar by the elbow ahead of the rest of the group when they're finished, so that he can corner him alone in the desert cold outside. give him the whip crack of his dark eyes and a tanned, hairy finger jabbing at Oscar's chest and "if you don't fix this now I will be hearing about it all weekend long from him." all Lando sees is the tail end of the exchange when Oscar's face is dutifully humbled and he looks sheepishly small, even though by now he stands at least three inches taller than Carlos.

by the time they're dropped back off at the hotel, Lando's lovesickness has turned into righteous fury. Daniel had given up trying to include him in filming a reel of the inside of the other guys all singing off-key in the Escalade. he shoots Oscar a sympathetic glance as Lando storms off ahead and gives Oscar's sleeve an angry tug to follow him.

the degree, if not the specifics, of how badly Oscar's fucked up starts to sink in during the long, silent elevator ride. all he can think is 'dead man walking' as he follows Lando to his room.

the door has barely snicked shut behind him before the dam bursts.

"you know we don't touch like that. you know that. you're Mr. No PDA with anyone! and I've just about managed to get used to it. you weren't even like that with Lily most of the time so it was, y'know, fine. and then you down one shot of tequila--"

"--and a shot of vodka…" Lando's face makes Oscar instantly regret interjecting. "Sorry."

"and suddenly you're all over me as if there wasn't an entire audience? as if we aren't going to have to turn this into some hilarious joke tomorrow so people don't get all… frickin' stupid! and I'm gonna have to see all these stupid fancams and…." Lando makes a hysterical noise of frustration here that one normally hears from children under the age of five. the way he hurls his own body onto the sofa adds to the image.

the silence is suddenly so loud that Oscar can hear his own fingernails against his jeans as he struggles with what do with his body. Lando has his head thrown back and is staring a hole into the ceiling. he no longer looks furious, just rumpled and… small.

Oscar gets a horrible feeling of tunnel vision, like the always-distant idea of Lando as something more than his casual friend and teammate is suddenly pulling away from him at an alarming rate. it makes his throat inconveniently close up.

"I'm sorry," feels like the correct start, even if it's choked out. no, he doesn't want it to sound like he's barely choking it out.

some instinct makes him move forward and drop down to one knee in front of Lando, who lifts his head inquisitively. already a big improvement.

"seriously, Lando. I'm s- so sorry for putting you through that. it was fucked up and probably borderline harassment and jesus." the enormity of it all starts crowding in and he has to press a hand over his eyes before he can bear to meet Lando's eyes again. "god, I know it's not like a 'compliment' but there's a reason why I don't go out and get drunk around you. fuck, I've been such a dog. I'm so sorry, Lando. believe me, I feel like absolute shit. as I should."

a curiously rapid change has been taking place over Lando's shape on the sofa - starting first with the clench of his jaw softening to a curious little 'o' between his lips and spreading out until his posture eases completely under the bulk of his hoodie and baggy jeans.

now he sits upright and leaning slightly forward, hands fidgeting in his lap.

"I mean. you don't have to be like that about it. Daniel's done more than that to me on camera. not like he ever asked for 'consent'. it's not a big deal."

"yeah, but he didn't actually mean it."

Oscar bravely holds his gaze steady, is almost blinded by the the daybreak of hope that crosses Lando's face. Oscar can see him debate back and forth three times before he finally speaks, mouse-like.

"you meant it?"

Oscar thinks he could give up food and drink to live entirely on the way Lando looks when he's this open and trusting, body in perpetual small motions like a creature let out of a cage and looking up at the big human hand hovering over it and hoping for a caress instead of a blow.

he rests his hand on Lando's knee, rubbing little circles with his thumb and offers a slow blink and a gentle smile.

"you know I do."

for a split second he worries when Lando's face crumples that he's going to burst into tears. instead, Lando slips off the sofa and bundles himself urgently into the circle of Oscar's arms. relief rolls like a tide over the panic he hadn't fully realized had hold of him and Oscar really lets himself put his hands on Lando: clutches him close around the shoulders, the back of his head, pressing grateful kisses into the curls and pulling the scent of Lando's hairline into his memory.

Lando sniffs and possibly wipes his runny nose against Oscar's shirt. he raises his face to be kissed properly, eyes closing when Oscar can't just kiss his lips and has to bless the tender, dusky skin of Lando's eyelids and the smooth warmth of his cheeks.

when he finally pulls away, Lando looks almost too beautiful to bear. his fists have wriggled between their bodies where Oscar's arms hold him close. he's compressed himself impossibly small in that way he can and smiles kittenish and sunny-eyed.

"do your knees hurt yet?"

and then Oscar bursts into high pitched giggles and Lando joins him and they roll in a ball of idiot boys on the floor and kiss. because there will be big decisions and awkward conversations with members of McLaren staff happening tomorrow and probably for days after. but right then it's all still their little secret world and all their only decision is between making out all night or trying to sleep.

#inchreplies #my writing #landoscar #landoscar fic prompt

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qcomicsy · 1 year

Text

Yo THIS is what I'm talking about new interpretations of Deadpool treating him like a fucking bugs bunny character. Deadpool doesn't just bounce back as if nothing happens, he doesn't "not feel the pain ad lacerations" and he sure as fuck doesn't just stand back watching people fuck with him.

And even more that that? He's not fucking stupid.

Listen I have my problems with the Deadpool (2008) run but this shit compared with the rest he had this last ten years of writing is fucking exasperating.

It doesn't matter how hot or famous, or heroic the person is. Wade does not like being like lied to and he doesn't fucking tolerate being toyed either. Specially after all the shit he's been through.

So tell me, why the fuck, now characters can just walk all over him and the only thing he does is make a bad reference? I'm so sick of this, so, so sick. He's a fucking human being.

Flesh and bone and feelings. And it's so fucking disrespectful after all those years of characterization and shit he's been through, writer's decided to fucking disregard all that that just to make their shitty jokes, that' aren't even funny.

Not only is a from a horrible taste, it doesn't make any goddamn sense. He's a mercenary and a good one, like scarily good. And it's so weird to me how out of nowhere people's just decided he's not dangerous anymore and instead of just being chill around him, this just took as an advantage to treat him like shit. And this is even more maddening when you realize (bad writing or not) he's fucking trying to be better.

I like this part of the run of 2008. Because it's just make sense, of course! The X-Men hates Deadpool. He was literally a guy who was paid to kill them who knows how many times, he's annoying, bitchy and has no respect for any of them, not even mentioning the weird relationship he has with Scott's son and how crossed them more times than the dignity of the whole team should bare. Deadpool had it coming the hate he got from the X-men, hell, and this was them being patient.

Now, even with them hating Wade, the X-Men was being extremely careful. That's the fucking mercenary Deadpool, you don't just give him shit and act like nothing happened. They're annoyed, angry, and hostile and yet not out of the line.

And even so

And I'm not saying I want him to be violent (even though he is still violent but now is just for 'hahaha isn't he craaaazyyy??? 🤪🤪' jokes). Wade has been at war with his violent tendencies since ever and I'm happy too see him kinda overcoming that over the years.

But fucking hell the last issues are fucking pushing it.

I mean what is this?

Look at this shit:

And then he just????

???????

Yeah Sure guys yall just fucking opened my guts up, but now let's just patch up and talk like palls because apparently my nervous system doesn't fucking work.

LOOK AT THIS FUCKIN BULLSHIT

"Hey Jessica" Bitch where's your backbone?

That's Jessica Jones they're not even friends!

This is how Wade reacted to Domino, his actual friend trying to fuck him over.

Like what the fuck happened to him? It's like they don't even consider him fucking human, he dies but doesn't deal with the after match, he has his guts exploded but whatever what is pain? He's going to shook of with a silly joke 🤪, he has no friends, he doesn't get offended, he doesn't get angry, he just there to suck the heroes dick and act like a lost puppy.

I'm fucking done man.

TDLR: Marvel took my man's balls and I want them back

#Deadpool #q rants #q talks comics #I'm legit upset about that holy shit akskksdk #I forgot how pissed off I was about it until I got back into reading him #long post

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angel-of-the-moons · 5 days

Note

May I request Mk 11 Mileena angst please?

Timelost

Mileena x Reader

TW/CW: Angst, death, Mileena's tendency to be feral af, graphic violence

MINORS DNI I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME

A/N: Okay this one is gonna be short but I came up with a perfect scenario--

😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

Mileena snarled as she climbed off of the shredded carcass of one of Earthrealm's champions. Some blonde human woman wearing a Special Forces uniform. She didn't care, her blood and viscera tasted sweet; even as she wiped the excess from her fanged maw.

The battle was going well, over half of the pitiful army that Raiden and his entourage had assembled lay dead on the battlefield.

The buzz of the adrenaline she felt heightened her euphoria as she turned to see you flip your pike around and skewer that pathetic Johnny Cage as he howled in grief. Apparently, the female Mileena had just disemboweled was his daughter, Cassie. The sight of the blood splashing from him as his intestines fell into his own hands coated you in a beautiful shade of red, making Mileena's heart stutter within her chest.

You were like some primal god of violence and death, a flurry of kicks, flips, and death-dealing blows as you annihilate each target you set yourself to.

"Mileena." Kitana's voice spat from behind her.

"Ssssssister..." Mileena drawled, twirling to face her.

Kitana scowled from behind her mask, readying her bladed fans with a flourish. "You are a disgusting facsimile, nothing more."

"Hahaha!" Mileena cackled, pulling her sais from Cassie Cage's warm, bleeding corpse. "I wanted us to be a family... But I don't see us braiding each other's hair anytime soon."

"Never, Mileena." Kitana growled, her clone's name dripping from her lips like foul poison.

The two women moved like lightning, metal clashing, blades slicing deep enough to cut but not seriously wound, they moved in a violent, macabre dance that was only put to a pause when Kitana landed a very lucky kick to her gut, knocking the wind from her and sending her flying into a foot soldier.

Kitana climbed a top Mileena and grabbed her by the hair, pressing the sharp side of her fan blade to her clone's throat after pinning her arms behind her. "Look at what your mindless violence and hubris has brought, Mileena! Look!"

Mileena's golden eyes glared angrily at the scene in front of her, her heart sinking with horror at what she was witnessing. The former Revenant Scorpion and Kuai Liang began swiping at you with their weapons; Scorpion with his sword and Kuai Liang with his frozen scythes.

You were holding your ground, but that territory slipped with each swipe and parry of your pike, each kick that knocked you off balance.

The worst had yet to come; that final blow, dealt by both Earthrealmers in unison--Scorpion's sword to your chest and one of Kuai Liang's scythes to your gut, your blood spurting in a way that Mileena would normally have found ethereal... had it not been coming from you, her greatest treasure.

"Look at what you've done, Mileena. The senseless deaths because of you." Kitana snarled. "See what mother and Shao Kahn's madness has--"

Mileena couldn't hear her "sister" any longer. She couldn't hear her lecture or heroic speech. All she saw was red at the edges of her vision as time seemed to slow down.

She wrenched her arms free, tipping her head down to dig her fangs into Kitana's arm, her blood tasting foul on her tongue as she shredded veins, muscle and sinew; severing the offending limb with haste as she yanked her fan from her flying palm.

Mileena spun around as Kitana clutched her bleeding stump, crying and sobbing in pain as she desperately tried to stop her spurting blood flow. She raised the pointed end of the fan as Kitana looked up at her, and plunged it into her skull as far as she possibly could, leaning down to tear out her throat with her teeth for added measure.

She turned around, mad with rage, a part of her hoping--praying--that maybe she could save you, force one of their magic-wielding lackeys to heal you before it was too late...

But the way you lay limp on the blood-stained ground, your murderers standing above you, told her otherwise.

And once again, Mileena lunged.

Once their remains lay shredded and scattered at her feet, Mileena stumbled towards you, sobbing hysterically as she dropped to her knees at your side. Her hands clenched and unclenched aimlessly as she looked down at your bloodied corpse, your lifeless hands clutching at the wound to your abdomen as dead, lightless eyes stared widely up at the sky.

She ripped at her hair, tearing bloody chunks of it from her scalp before she clutched at your dead body, rocking back and forth as the battle raged on around her.

At some point, she could hear Shao Kahn's victorious cry. The Titan Kronika was dead, the Hourglass was won; Liu Kang lay dead at he and Sindel's feet. Shang Tsung disemboweled like hunted game.

But none of that mattered, now.

Only you, and the beautiful voice Mileena may never hear say her name again.

#🌙 answered #mileena x reader #mileena x you #Mortal Kombat x reader #Mortal Kombat x you #MK 11 #Mortal Kombat 11

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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 5 days

Note

For the ship game: Leopika and Hisoillu! I don't know your ship taste well so I'm just hitting a couple other big HxH ships hrjfjkjkdlgdfk hope you don't mind

Oh, I don't mind at all, Percy! :)

Hisoillu is... I mean... they are kind of sort of engaged (?) so. Yeah, it makes sense. Also, I can think of no one else in the universe who should be subjected to close proximity with these two on a regular basis hdfhbsdhj. Congrats, you're perfect for each other, just never involve anyone else in what you've got going on ever. Truthfully, I'm kind of indifferent towards it as a ship. It makes sense to me, but it's not something I actively seek out in fanworks I suppose. It's just, yeah, Hisoka and Illumi are together. Happy for them lol. I guess it's mostly because I think murder is their love language and I just... can't see them being romantic with each other in a lot of the more typical ways that characterize many fanworks. Do they want to kill each other, or are they into each other? The answer is both - the murder is an intrinsic aspect of the "being into each other" hdjfbvhd. That said, I think they have a pretty healthy respect for each other, due to probably being evenly matched, I'd say. I think Hisoka genuinely finds Illumi good company, and Illumi readily has fairly casual conversations with Hisoka. Their dynamic is kind of fascinating actually, and I do honestly think they're kind of perfect for each other. Diversity win??? Loss??? I'm honestly not sure lmao

Leopika :') I love the potential for them. Sadly, they don't have all that many interactions in the canon manga, so I would ordinarily say it doesn't make a huge amount of sense, but then we have the 99 anime and the radio skits who seem determined to ship them so hfbgjdhj I have no clue. I'm weird about this ship because I tend to alternate between "yeah they're cute" and "oh god. oh god. them. AAARGGHHH" and experiencing emotional damage hahaha. I am like this with no other ship. It's very strange to me.

The one thing is that I'm extremely picky with Kurapika characterization, in any art or story. If Kurapika doesn't read right to me, I just can't suspend my disbelief. I'm really not big on the "mom and dad" characterization, though no shade to anyone who is.

Peak Leopika dynamic to me takes into account not just Leorio's concern and Kurapika's walls, but also their mutual stubbornness and Kurapika's hilarious tendency to annoy Leorio on purpose. To me, I've always felt that he likes Leorio because he's a guy who wears his heart on his sleeve and values individual lives so strongly, so he kind of checks that he hasn't changed that much when they see each other. I think it's kind of relieving for Kurapika, in a way, to know that Leorio will always be himself - "same old Leorio" kind of deal.

I also think Kurapika is just a little shit hjgbvsjdh

But no, I love that Leorio clearly eases up some of the pressure Kurapika feels, and seems to make him feel better about things- that's probably half the reason he keeps him at arms length. I think affectionate bickering is their love language. I also wish people noticed a little more that it's Kurapika who actually seriously initiated friendship between them, not Leorio. In most cases in the Hunter Exam, it was Kurapika approaching Leorio and showing a clear interest in sticking with him and helping him pass and achieve his dream. I think it's incredibly meaningful that one of the first people Kurapika meets and takes a liking to is this guy who wants to become a doctor - the doctor that Kurapika had left in the first place to go looking for. Anyways, I'm really looking forward to see what role Leorio will play in the current arc (just to have more Leorio, honestly, pls Togashi I miss him...), as I'm sure he will eventually find out about Emperor Time and OH BOY I'm sure that will go over well.

Erm. Sorry for rambling. I had a lot to say apparently...

#storyrambles #thanks for the ask!#ask game #hxh

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earlgreytea68 · 7 months

Text

I have been traveling recently, and this is an observation I have from using various showers in various hotels over the past week.

My observation is: I think we have gone backwards in terms of shower design.

I know that showers are a waste of water and i do try to be responsible in showering (although also apparently artificial intelligence is using a bunch of water and I, for one, would like to vote against artificial intelligence and in favor of showers instead) but I have to confess that showers are one of the great, little, attainable treats of my life. Like, you know, one of those things that bring great joy, that's a shower for me. I love them and cherish them (especially because my grandmother refuses to shower anymore and people keep telling us that all old people hate to shower and so I especially am cherishing my showers now in case someday I grow old enough to hate them and they lose their joy for me).

ANYWAY. This is all to say. I care a great deal about shower design, and I think we've gone backwards.

To start with, I'm not a fan of the whole rainshower phenomenon, although I fully understand that this is probably a matter of taste. (I don't want to get my hair wet every time I shower, and having the water come from directly above at a ninety-degree angle makes it trickier to only get everything on your body below your head wet.)

But I digress. The bigger issue I have found in these hotels is...neither one of them had shower doors. They had a SINGLE shower door, yes, that covered a little bit of the shower space. When I used to travel more frequently in Europe, that's how their showers were designed, and I never understood WHY, and now, of all the wonderful things we could choose to copy from Europe, apparently we have decided to copy this terrible shower design.

First of all, having the shower mostly open means that there's a constant draft of cold air through the opening, which is not what I like when I shower, but I do understand that maybe some people get hot when they shower and so they want to be able to have cold air coming in at them.

But my other problem with this design is........how do people shower without getting water all over the floor???????? I sincerely mean this. I tried to shower as carefully as possible, keeping my movements very small and limited and squeezing myself into the farthest corner of the shower, and in both of the hotel rooms I was in this week the bathroom floor by the opening was soaked by the time I was finished. I kept towels bunched up on the floor to try to soak up the water, but that cannot possibly be good for...anything. In the second hotel, it wasn't even my showering that made the water go all over the floor. Just turning the shower on caused water to spray through the opening and onto the floor. Even when I shifted the nozzle to point as far away from the opening as possible, it was ricocheting off the walls and still making everything wet. I just....why???? Both of these hotels had clearly been recently redesigned to do this and..........why????? Why not just.......put shower doors onto the shower to keep the water inside the shower??????

Is it just me? Am I really weird? Does everyone else love these showers without doors and hate showers with doors? If so, please tell me what I'm doing wrong, if you know. I mean, maybe you're just saying, "Huh? Why would the water be going through the opening? What's wrong with the way EGT takes showers?" In which case, it's okay, I'll just slink away lol.

Sorry for this very long post but as I said, I think a lot about showers, and it really frustrates me when I can't enjoy them hahaha.

#showers

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fanficapologist · 17 hours

Note

I… am getting slightly suspicious hahaha I feel like this chapter is meant to make me have a bit of sympathy for Alys only because I’ll absolutely hate her when she does sleep with Aemond in his POV chapter. And then feel vindicated when she does kick the bucket in 78. 👀

But uh, yeah, this chapter is interesting because I feel like it humanizes Alys a bit. So, in canon, I don’t know much about her. But I’ve read some theories regarding her being a wet nurse and for that to happen, she had to have been frequently pregnant without actually letting the child develop full term, just so her body would produce milk. Now these pregnancies could also imply it was against her will, like what she said in this chapter. I don’t like Alys, call it jealousy or other but her backstory in ODAM is both sad and tragic. No one deserves that to happen to them.

And hot take, but I am with Alys on this one. Maera is speaking from a place of privilege because Alys had stated that being high born in itself gives Maera options that wouldn’t be accessible to Alys. For instance, had Maera been a simple servant in the Red Keep, I doubt anyone would bat an eye if Aegon forced himself on her. But because she’s high born, she gets to have a sworn shield, etc. In a way, I do understand why she wanted to grab any opportunity (manipulating Aemond) that could grant her a better station. When the cards you’ve been dealt with all your life are shit, I imagine you’d do anything just to get a taste of comfort. However, that does make her dangerous because we don’t know the extent of what she’s willing to go through.

Still, Maera’s powerlessness and anger is valid because at some point, Aemond had clearly trusted Alys enough and so did the council of Lords at Harrenhal. And she’s right about her life being a gilded cage because even if you are well-off, it does come with its own sets of challenges. And apparently, her status as his wife isn’t enough to get Aemond to listen to her because short of her words being canon law, one would think Alys was a god with the way she behaved.

But yeah, we’ll see about Aemond’s POV hahahahahaha

The great thing is about this is is two things CAN exist at the same time. Alys did have a hard life and does have a point about Maera’s privilege and that as a high born lady, Maera has no idea what struggles common-born women face. Yet we can still condemn Alys for her actions.

I’ve taken some themes from the original Game of Thrones and mixed it into ODAM-

- Daenerys and Khal Drogo/ Maera and Aemond: both husbands did unspeakable, unforgivable acts to their wives. Both women love their husbands yet have to live with the trauma these men have caused them forever.

- Mirri Maz Duur (healer from season 1) and Alys Rivers: These witches have had horrible things happen to them, and have gained power how they can, but we condemn them for their actions against the characters we love e.g. Mirri killing Drogo and Alys’s whole fucking plan so far.

#maera wylde #aemond targaryen #aemond x oc #aemond fanfiction #chapters #hotd aemond #hotd fanfic #house targaryen #house wylde #hotd helaena

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lumine-no-hikari · 23 days

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Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #105

I did a much better job with my to-do list today.

I went to therapy and drew a picture. We're gonna keep working on my ability to have faith in the integrity of my own senses, perceptions, and experiences. From there, I did laundry, washed a bunch of dishes, and made whipped cream - one was just plain cream and sugar, and the other is cream and hot chocolate mix, beaten until it has a mousse-like consistency. I like to call that one "hot chocolate pudding"!

…You wanna know how to make it, doncha? 😁 Who wouldn't, ahahaha~! So I'll tell you:

You need 1 cup of heavy cream (or coconut cream, if you prefer!) and 8 tablespoons of hot chocolate mix. I use Sillycow Farms; it tastes really good, and it's vegan and gluten-free, just in case that matters.

Then you stick the heavy cream and the hot chocolate mix into a bowl, and beat the shit out of it until it's a consistency that you like. If you have a stand mixer (I have one of these, because trying to mix stuff together while dyspraxic is an exercise in messes and frustration…), it's very, very simple. Then, you have a bowl full of foamy, chocolatey goodness that is suitable for putting on ice cream, spreading around as frosting, sticking into tea, or just eating straight from the bowl with a spoon!

I will show you some pictures now!

This is the finished regular whipped cream. I wonder if you like this stuff:

This is what it looks like when you combine the hot cocoa mix and the heavy cream in the stand mixer:

Here is the resulting hot chocolate pudding!

...And here is the whisk I wish I could give to you to lick. Everyone should get an opportunity to lick a whisk that has tasty things on it:

...And this is Hoshi! Hoshi is sad that he can't have anything on the whisk (chocolate is poisonous to cats; they can't process the theobromine in it), so I gave him some scritches:

I also got around to trying that lychee and rose tea. Apparently there is also vanilla in it; I missed that little detail in my previous letter to you. Sorry about that. It's very good!! But I can't give you a cup of it. So I'll send along some pictures.

This is the tin it comes in:

Here's how it looked like after it was brewed; I used my fancy DINOSAUR MUG!!! OH MAN!!! 🤩🤩🤩

Here's how it looked after I added honey and milk:

I also cooked a steak! Because I need the iron! It's seasoned very simply with some salt, pepper, and garlic powder! It's good stuff!! I also can't give you any, and this is very sad, because this one turned out REALLY good!! So I'll send along a picture:

…I'm definitely in the "leave it mostly raw" camp, when it comes to steak. Naturally, you have to kill the surface bacteria to avoid getting sick (this is why I make the outside all brown and crispy), but that's pretty much it. I wonder how you like yours cooked, if you like beef at all. Some people don't, and that's okay too.

There's so much still that I wanna do today. Last time I was at the grocery, I managed to get the supplies needed to make a recipe that was sent to me in this space, and I'm VERY eager to try it out in the near future. Sadly though, I think I might have to wait until some of the other food I made is eaten so that we have room in the fridge…

…For some reason, I get the feeling that if you were around, we'd have absolutely no problem making room in the fridge, though, hahaha! For sure, I wish you could be here so I could give you all sorts of tasty and wholesome things to eat. There's a lot I wish I could give to you, actually. My world has its problems, for sure, but there's also lots of cool stuff to do - lots of good books to read, pretty places to go walking, awesome music to listen to, fun games to play, and enlightening things to watch. I really, really wish you could visit. You'd be safe here.

I can't really think of anything else to write today, so I guess I'll end things here. Don't lose sight of the fact that you're loved and that there are people who wish well on you.

I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

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kaeyachi · 1 year

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Ok I watched the Caribert quest with a fresher mind (yes it takes weeks to refresh my mind), and now I have additional thoughts from my scrambled egg brain:

- The Caribert is Kaeya theory was honestly a genuinely good idea for a moment due to curious text lines... I only doubt it due to different voice actors for Kaeya's father and Clothar Alberich. For the most part, a solid theory if we can ignore the voice actor tidbit. Otherwise, I think he is from Clothar's legitimate line or Clothar has a brother or two (based on who he was inspired by)

- the Khaenri'ahn library honestly feels like the Library of Alexandria at this point. This is the same library that apparently had the information Clothar needed to try and cure Caribert. Also, in the beginning of the quest, Kaeya mentions a book he read in his youth that mentioned where Khaenri'ah (or one of the entry points anyway) is located which I guess is probably not found within the Ragnvindr collection because he mentioned himself that he had just been taken in. Imagine the centuries of information they must have had to become the most advanced nation of their time (and even now). With Khaenri'ah gone, 90% of that library's information is probably destroyed. That definitely set back the entirety of Teyvat lmao

- I think I mentioned in a previous post how curious it is that people of Teyvat don't know that Khaenri'ahns (non-full blooded ones anyway) were turned into hilichurls. When was the Caribert quest set though? Because the forest rangers there didn't know about it at all, and if transforming into hilichurls was a slow process, the lack of information these people have is weird... unless everyone who transformed only transformed during the war in Khaenri'ah, which is why Clothar was telling Caribert "no more red skies, no more war"

- speaking of those forest rangers... the way they talk about hilichurls left a bad taste in my mouth. I have the feeling that the Knights of Favonius also have several knights talk like that....... and Kaeya has to hear that regularly...he has been for nearly a decade.......

- For the abyss twin to be called the Prince/Princess of Khaenri'ah, they must have been taken in by Alberich clan right? I wanted to say King Irmin took them in, but then I wondered why they didnt become the king/queen themselves and instead got the Alberich clan to be regents. The Alberich clan was far larger than I think it was (its probably a very large family for sure if Clothar can say that it's impossible for our twin to know everyone even though Clothar is an Alberich himself). Our twin never became the king/queen so our twin being adopted by the Alberichs sound more likely (Kaeya calling our twin uncle/aunt, could yall imagine? Or even brother/sister... Kaeya calling them gramps/grandma HAHAHA)

- Even within the abyss order, they can't call our twin the king/queen. Dainsleif mentioned there's an order to these things, and since an Alberich was the founder... by heir right, should there be no other Alberich, that would really mean that Kaeya is their next king. Yikes, I'd get drunk daily too if i were him.

I think I have a theory forming within my brain regarding the crystal the hilichurls were worshipping... but thats for next time.

#genshin impact #caribert #gi 3.5 #genshin impact 3.5 #kaeya #kaeya alberich #still a kaeya blog sooooooo #yes its still about kaeya lmao

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