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taestefully-in-luv · 2 years

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Love Again | PJM (Four)

Summary: A friend of yours is eager to introduce you to her new man but what happens when Park Jimin, the man who broke your heart 5 years ago walks in through the door?

Pairing: Jimin x Female reader

Genre: exes au, exes to ???, fluff, angst, smut

Word Count: 14.6k

Warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption, mentions of puking, heated make out, grinding, thinking of someone else while with someone hehe, infidelity (but not really? Or like…at all?) (perspective lol)

Notes: I enjoy this chapter as well as the next chapter lol hope you guys do too. I hope you continue to enjoy this story. Love hearing from you guys<3 Send an ask if you want to be added to a tag list or just want to chat:)

Tag list: @yoongimentita7 @rjsmochii @aria-grace-scott @ravensading @shrimpmsg @phossmos @ceyoongs @btsis7okay @loljrau @ggukkieland @forever-once-gone @joyfullycrazypuppy @taejoonswifey @awseokjin @telepathytae @ssaltytears @jikooksgirl19 @celeste-q @koreanaestheticc @shesoldbutcute @main-bangtansmauyeondan @mawwnsterr @dopedreamfireparty @bri-mal @callmejimmeo @bloopkook @ncizen @natalie-rdr @familiarlikemymirror3 @theestrangeddreamer @chimchimmarie @sugas-baby-girl

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He looks pretty miserable to say the least…Jimin is sprawled out on your bathroom floor, somehow his socks came off at one point, you find them thrown towards the door. His bare feet on the cold tile, his toes curling in and out as he sighs out tiredly. He’s been in a here for at least 40 minutes by now…you haven’t heard any sign of him throwing up for at least 20 minutes and he looks like he’s fighting off sleep.

“Jimin?” You call out, hesitant to walk further into the bathroom. “You okay?”

His head immediately lifts from the ground as he tries to crack open at least one eye to get a look at you. He struggles…to say the least.

“No.” He manages to answer as honestly as before, his one eye stays on you before he breathes out and lowers his head again. “But if you’re talking about my physical wellbeing then yeah, I am fine. I think the worst is over with.”

Then he continues, “I think I’ll make it but maybe you could come help me up?” He laughs a bit with the slur of his words.

“Sure.” You open the bathroom door wider, now truly stepping in as you make your way to Jimin. He’s already sitting himself up and reaches for your hand to help pull him up, he laughs again as he stumbles into you, his hands finding a spot on either side of your waist as he steadies himself.

Getting Jimin to brush his teeth wasn’t too hard, he brushed lazily and then splashed some water onto his face, hoping to wake him up just a little. But he was tired. It was obvious to the both of you. He stared at himself in the mirror, his eyes looking sad and empty all over again, slightly shining with unfallen tears.

“You should try to sleep.” You tell him, staring at him through his reflection. He gives a small smile before nodding his head, quickly agreeing with you.

Jimin brushes past you as he leaves the bathroom, he drags his feet down the hall and is approaching your bedroom when you catch up to him quickly and tug on his shirt from behind.

“Yeah, not there, buddy.” You stifle your slight laughter as he looks confused before nodding his head in realization.

“Right. Yes. Makes sense.” He drunkenly turns and heads back to the living room and plops himself onto your sofa. “Obviously this is where I am sleeping.” He mumbles and you giggle to yourself, finding a seat next to him.

“Obviously.”

Jimin leans back against the couch, his head resting on the cushion, eyes closing slowly. You watch him as he lays back, his arms heavy by his sides, his breathing a little rough. He keeps his eyes closed, hit teeth digging into his bottom lip. You aren’t sure what he’s thinking or feeling at the moment but you know it isn’t good when you see the first tear leave his closed lid. It slides down his cheek, hitting the corner of his nose, and finally falling past his lips.

You don’t know what you are supposed to do…how do you comfort your ex-boyfriend? What’s even appropriate? You know you should say or do something quickly though because more tears fall as he lays here, unmoving. Maybe his space is what he really needs at the moment.

“I—”

“You know,” Jimin speaks up, his voice unusually steady, despite his face wet with tears. “I thought I had cried it all out. But I guess being with you,” He opens his eyes and glances at you. “I guess I feel like breaking all over again.” He chuckles quietly, closing his eyes again.

“Hold on…” You tell him, standing up as you go get something. Jimin opens his eyes slightly, he watches you make your way to the bathroom again before you’re coming back in his direction.

“Close your eyes.” You take your seat next to him again, “It’s warm, don’t worry.” You say, referring to the towelette in your hands.

“Mm.” Jimin hates how difficult it is to smile, he wants to show you his gratitude…but seeing what you are about to do only makes him cry more. He leans his head back again and squeezes his eyes shut, more tears warm on his cheeks. You lean towards him and pat his skin with the damp towelette. This is one way you can comfort him without crossing any serious lines. He always loved when you did this.

“You’re okay. You’re okay.” You try to assure him, he sniffles harder as he tries to take a few deep breaths. You are trying to stay emotionally like, disconnected. He’s hurting and it hurts…you. You don’t know what happened. You don’t know how this all connects to Taehyung’s texts. The biggest mystery is New York. Fucking New York.

After several minutes, you notice the tears have stopped. You clean his face from old tears with the little towel and throw the towel to the floor. Jimin remains silent, you don’t think he’s sleeping but his breathing might be calm enough to question it. Maybe he just needs his space now, some alone time, some time to really think on his own. You think that’s probably the best so you clear your throat and start to stand up.

“Wait.” Jimin leans forward, his fingers wrapped around your wrist. “Don’t go. Please.” His eyes are soft and puffy and so, so sad. What? You’re just being honest. You stand here, awkwardly obviously. He can sense your hesitance, his eyes falling to your wrist, quickly letting go of it and looking off to the side.

“Okay.” You agree, surprising yourself. Jimin whips his head towards you, tilting his chin up and eyeing you with such a tender gaze. And also a drunk gaze…but it’s still soft. You realize that space isn’t what he wants. Fucking duh, that’s why he’s here in the first place! Because he didn’t want to be alone…today, specifically.

“I promise I’ll stay with you.” You whisper as you sit down again, your thigh smooshed against his. You can’t hold him all night like in the past, but you can try to be as close as possible without it being misunderstood. (By other people…you know, if they magically appeared and saw you two.)

Alright, you think. It is time to piece this all together. Here are the facts…Jimin left for New York, had an amazing time (To your knowledge) and then he returned here, to your city and he’s different. What occurred in New York? Kim Taehyung, Jimin’s best friend has a bunch of unanswered texts…what could have split them apart? Jimin mentioned that he is unable to block him…so he still cares, obviously. Taehyung mentioned that something happened a year ago…a bad breakup? That’s the only explanation that makes sense.

You shake your head because no, it’s not the only explanation…it could be about his time on Broadway? Did something happen? Lucy said that the rumors going around mentioned Jimin showing up late, showing up drunk, fighting with the crew and even cussing out the Director. None of those things sound like Jimin in the slightest. But then again, a person can change a lot in five years.

You glance over at Jimin, his head is rested against the cushion again, fresh tears spilling from his closed eyes. Jeez, what the hell happened? You’re frustrated. You hate this sight. What’s got him so heartbroken? Without thinking, your hand reaches for his. He reacts quickly, his hand tightening around yours, squeezing it in appreciation. He continues to sniffle as he brings both your hands into his lap and his other hand goes to hold your hands as well. He holds on tightly, almost like he’s afraid you’ll let go.

A long while passes like this. His tears have stopped but he still struggles to take deep breaths. Every now and then he mumbles something you can’t understand and you wonder if he’s falling asleep or if his mind is still wide awake. You decide to voice your thoughts, not really expecting a response from him.

“Jimin…” You say his name quietly, he doesn’t react though but you continue anyway. “The first night we talked on the phone…you brought up the time we almost broke up in third year. Why did you want to know my feelings on that?”

Jimin goes stiff at your question, you can quite literally feel it. His tight grip on your hand loosens considerably so and then he’s letting go of your hand altogether. Opening his eyes, he sits up now, leaning forward on the couch, staring straight ahead, the empty look returning again.

“Today…” Jimin says softly, his lips curving up into an odd smile. “Today of all days you bring that up?” His chuckle is bitter. You don’t respond. How can you? You have no idea what the hell he means. “Do you…” He turns his head to look at you, his eyes locked in on yours. “Do you know how easy it was with you? God, everything was so…” Then his eyes fall to both of your thighs. “No, can I even say that out loud? Is it wrong to say that now?”

“Jimin,” You whisper his name, feeling uneasy calling for him.

“Things with you…” Jimin leans forward, surprising you yet not surprising you when his forehead meets yours. You can’t even think about how this may look…not when he’s this torn up about something. His eyes are closed and he’s just breathing you in, his nose brushing against yours. He stays in this moment for a while…and you let him. It’s a moment for you as well.

Jimin pulls away from you, just slightly, just enough that his head forehead is not pushed up against yours…but his nose is still barely grazing your nose. He blinks at you, his eyes trying so hard to focus on yours, you stare back at him and wonder what he will say.

“y/n…” He breathes out, his soft, warm breath hitting your lips and you feel yourself unable to breathe. Jimin’s hand goes to your cheek, his thumb rubbing against your skin. You are at a loss for words, if you’re honest. You don’t even want to breathe. His touch feels all too familiar, all too soft and all too pure. Nothing about this feels wrong…because you aren’t currently thinking about what makes it wrong—because it is. But that doesn’t stop your heart from pounding. Your heart giving away how all of this feels.

Jimin doesn’t say anything further, just your name still lingering on his tongue. His thumb continues to rub your cheek, his other fingers resting right below your ear. Your eyes never leave his, you both gaze intently before Jimin’s gaze flickers lower and suddenly you feel the plumpness of his lips lightly brushing against yours. All too familiar, all too soft, all too pure. Your heart still going crazy.

And then it feels like someone is hitting a gong and releasing you from hypnosis. Your eyes widen and you’re quickly pushing Jimin back by the shoulders. Suddenly, you both look much more awake as realization dawns on you both.

“Oh.” Jimin mumbles awkwardly, his eyes going all around the living room now. “I’m so…oh my god, I am so sorry.” He scoots an inch or two away from you, his fingers going to his lips, looking surprised with himself.

“Ah, it’s okay. It’s okay.” You chuckle awkwardly, hoping it’ll ease some of the tension in the room. “We technically didn’t…so it’s…seriously, it’s fine.”

“Today is a fucking mess.” Jimin sighs out, his hand going to scratch the back of his neck. “I am so sorry y/n…” He finally looks at you again, body on fire as you try to wave him off lightheartedly.

“I really think you should try to get some sleep.” You offer him a smile, even though your entire body feels warm, you are trying to be as sincere as possible. “Lay down?”

Jimin nods slowly, eyeing you carefully but decides to listen regardless. He lays away from you, he brings his legs up onto the sofa and he curls into himself. You decide you’ll stay until you’re sure he’s asleep. But the sound of his soft snores and calm breaths is enough to lull you to sleep right there next to him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Three weeks later-

“I can’t believe they made out at my party though.” Hoseok sets down his sandwich, some of its fillings falling out. “I didn’t even know they were like that!”

“Oh, you’re just being bitter.” You glance at him, giving him a knowing smirk. “You’re just mad someone got some action on your birthday and it wasn’t you.”

“It was shocking though!” Naomi butts in, “Sora is so quiet! She barely even talks at work and then she comes to Hoseok’s birthday party—a surprise in itself—and makes out with the dude who is always complaining about the coffee maker. I don’t even know his name.” She admits with a shrug.

“Sora is cute.” Jeremy comments, “It’s not like just because she never talks at work that she doesn’t have a life that includes kissing coworkers.”

“Sora was adorable, she was so drunk.” You laugh, remembering Hoseok’s party from a few weeks ago. “Well, everyone was. Especially…” You catch Hoseok’s gaze and burst out laughing. “You seriously made me sleep with you on the kitchen floor for a solid 30 minutes because you refused to get up.”

“It was my birthday, I am allowed to be shamefully drunk!” Hoseok pouts, “At least you got to sleep in a bed. Who let me fall asleep on the dining room table? You guys could have woken me up…”

“Yeah, right.” Naomi shakes her head. “Lucy was the only one who wasn’t giving up on you. But the three of us,” She points at herself, you and Jeremy. “Know better. Your ass won’t get up for shit.”

“Luce, only you are going in my will.” Hoseok glances at her with a straight face, “As for the rest of you…”

“It was a mission success though!” You reach over to Hoseok’s plate, grabbing a fry. “Birthday boy was drunk as hell and the rest of us…well, let’s be honest,” You laugh, “We weren’t much better.”

“True.” Jeremy agrees, “It was a good time. But Lucy,” He looks over at her, she freezes innocently, chewing on her food. “You seemed kind of…off? That night? Were you okay?”

“Oh, she was just missing lover boy.” Naomi teases. “Jimin didn’t go…that’s why you were down, right?”

“Well—”

“Now that I think about it…” Jeremy chews his lunch obnoxiously. “When’s the last time we saw Jimin? It’s been a while, right?”

It has been a while, you think. You personally haven’t see him since the night he came to your home, drunk and crying. You don’t want to make this about you…but…is he avoiding you?

“He’s just been really busy with rehearsals.” Lucy assures everyone with her sweet smile, “It’s been crazy at work! We only have a few weekend shows left and he’s just such a perfectionist.”

Well, you can believe that. But it still feels strange to you.

“How is he?” You blurt without realization. “I mean, uh, you mentioned before he seemed weird? Is he better?”

“Oh, that?” Lucy grins, waving you off with a hand. “He’s fine! Like I said, just busy.”

“So…he seems okay? Like, he’s doing fine?”

“Yeah?” Lucy tilts her head, a brow cocking at you. “Why?”

“Huh? No, no reason. Just wondering!” You realize it probably is weird that you have a sudden interest in Jimin’s wellbeing but you have every reason to wonder…to worry. But you also realize asking Lucy probably is a waste of time when you should just be asking Jimin himself.

“I think he’s fine.” She nods her head, as if convincing herself. “We don’t have shows this weekend so we’re taking it pretty easy at the theatre this week. He’s actually at his parent’s place today.” Lucy says as you nod along not really paying too much attention as you take your phone out. You find Jimin’s name in your messages and send him a text.

“That’s cool!” Hoseok picks up his sandwich again, taking an enormous bite. “You guys want to go bowling tonight? There’s like a deal after 7 I think.”

“I’m down.” Jeremy smirks. “You guys know I am a bowling champ though, right? You’re prepared for that?”

“Oh, please Jer. Yeah, you do get strikes and stuff, sure. But do you really get to be all that smug about it? Does it really count? You use bumpers.” Naomi cackles, “Like a fucking elementary school kid!”

“It’s just in case! Most the time the ball doesn’t even touch them!”

“I still don’t think it counts.”

“I’m bad at bowling.” Lucy slumps her shoulders, “I’ll go, only if you guys promise you won’t make fun of me.”

“You know that’s something we cannot promise…” Hoseok laughs. “It’ll be fine. I’ll help you.”

“As fun as this all sounds,” You wipe your mouth with a napkin, setting it back down onto the table before continuing. “I have some plans with Namjoon tonight. Next time for sure, though. Also,” You look at the time on your phone. “It’s almost 1! We need to get back to work.”

“Oh shit.” Jeremy rushes to finish his lunch. “I swear one hour is not enough.”

“Same.” Naomi grumbles, quickly cleaning around her. “We spend the whole time talking instead of eating.”

“Well, lunch was nice as always. Again sometime this week?” Lucy asks, her eyes going around the table waiting for confirmation.

“Of course!” You smile for her. “Probably Wednesday.” Your phone lights up with a notification, you quickly look down but you see it’s just an email. No text back from Jimin yet.

Work was tiring today, you’re glad that your plans with Namjoon had you saying no to bowling plans tonight. He said it wouldn’t be until later tonight so you’re just relaxing. It’s past 7 now so you’re sure your friends are already at the bowling alley, ordering beer and talking shit about who’s going to win or lose. You can already see Naomi and Jeremy being the most competitive while Hoseok is using ‘teaching’ as an excuse to touch Lucy’s hands on the bowling ball. You roll your eyes with a chuckle, those two are…well, you guess it doesn’t matter.

You’re lying on your sofa, the lazy atmosphere feeling nice and relaxed. The only thing that doesn’t feel relaxed is you, every time your phone vibrates with a new notification. You hate that since this afternoon you’ve been anticipating a text back from Jimin. You sent him a simple text asking how he’s doing. But nothing. Nada.

It’s probably around 8 when you feel how heavy your eyelids are, the TV screen getting blurred with how sleepy you have gotten. Well, a nap at 8pm never hurt anybody right? You will have your phones sound on so you’ll know when Namjoon hits you up. You decide to snuggle into your blanket on the sofa and embrace how cozy this feels. Yes, sleep sounds great—and then there’s the very annoying and consistent sound of your phone going off. You roll to your side where your phone is laying, reaching groggily for the device. You pick it up and bring it closer to your face and then your eyes go wide when you read the name. Jimin.

You quickly sit up, clearing your throat over and over and practicing a ‘hello’ over and over in different tones, trying to find the right one. What the hell are you doing…? You can’t help but laugh at yourself, you are being ridiculous. You shake your head, deciding to just answer the freaking phone…it’s just Jimin.

“Hello?” You speak into the phone like you didn’t just practice that single word like 6 different times.

“Hey.” His voice is smooth on the other side, “I saw your text earlier and figured I would just call you when I got the chance.”

“And I am guessing this is you with that chance?”

Jimin laughs, the sound breathy, “Yes. I’ve been with my parents all day. You know how they don’t like it when I’m on the phone when I’m supposed to be spending time with them.” He explains, his tone is light, you can almost hear it in his voice that he’s smiling as he speaks.

“Ah, yes. They were always strict about that particular thing.” You giggle. “So, how are your parents?”

“They’re doing really well.” Jimin tells you, “My dad is looking to retire really soon while my mom, well, she has a new hobby like every other week…so, I don’t see her resting just yet.”

“Oh, what does he want to do when he retires?”

“Sit on the porch.” Jimin laughs, “Nothing else, really.”

“Sounds like the life.”

“I’m sure it is.”

“So, you’ve been…okay?” You ask, your tone careful as you try to pry into Jimin’s life. “I feel like you haven’t been around much lately.”

“I’m okay.” He says, voice not too convincing.

“Okay…” Then you chuckle awkwardly. “I wasn’t too sure if you were like, avoiding me or n—”

“Do you remember when we first moved into our place,” Jimin quickly changes the subject, “And you were trying to make pancakes or something and the pan was burning and there was so much smoke…” He’s laughing lightly now, “And you didn’t even realize that the whole kitchen was all smokey—”

“It’s not that I didn’t realize!” You try to defend, “I just thought it was okay because it’s not like the smoke detector was going off!”

“Yeah. But we later found out there were no batteries…” Jimin snorts at the memory, “You were probably going to burn our place down.”

“I was not!”

“What about that time I came from class and the whole apartment felt like it was inside an oven…only for me to see the stove was turned on! And you had no idea! You were sleeping in our room.”

“I seriously don’t remember ever turning on the stove though….but it’s possible since the eggs were on the counter…”

“Yeah, you went to the kitchen, planned on making eggs, got distracted, forgot about it and then took a nap.” Jimin teases you. “You’re a real danger to yourself and those who live with you.”

“I am not that bad. It only happened twice!”

“Two times is too many.” He chuckles. “I wonder how you’re still alive to this day without me being there to make sure the place doesn’t burn down.” “I was young then, Jimin. I have matured since then.”

“Right, of course.” Jimin continues to tease you.

“Well, it’s not like you were perfect!”

“Aren’t I though?”

“Remember when you drunkenly adopted that ‘cat’? You know that cat that you found by the trashcans outside our apartment?”

“I do not recall.”

“Oh so you don’t remember the ride to the ER when this ‘cat’ scratched the hell out of you, making you bleed everywhere—oh my god, I seriously thought you were dying.” You giggle, “But that’s not even the worst! Remember when you didn’t tell me your parents were coming over…?”

“Oh shit.” Jimin tries his best to contain his laughter, “That’s not my fault! I didn’t know you were going to do…that.” Jimin is grateful you can’t see him, he knows his face is reddening as he remembers the image of you.

“Yeah, imagine how I felt? There I am, dressed in lacey ass lingerie, waiting for you to come home so I can…well, you were having a bad day, remember?”

“Yes, I remember.” He stifles a chuckle, “And you just wanted to make me feel better.”

“Yeah, had a grand plan on seducing you and…well, you get what happens. But no! Here you come with your parents trailing right behind you. Oh my god, I have never seen your mother look more mortified.”

“She said lavender looks great on you though?” Jimin laughs harder now, the image of you in pretty lace, your skin very exposed, and then your expression when you realize his parents were there too. He doesn’t know who’s face was funnier…yours, his moms or his dads.

“Oh thanks.” You deadpan.

“It’s a shame though…”

“What?”

“That you got rid of that lingerie. It was very pretty and I never got to really experience you in it.” He tells you honestly, his voice dipping a little lower than before.

“Well, yeah. As if I was ever going to wear it again after your parents had seen me in it.”

“You can’t see me but I just shrugged.”

“Typical.” You roll your eyes with a laugh. “So…”

“So.” Jimin sighs. “What is it?” he asks, tone softer.

“You came to my place a few weeks ago.” You remind him, “Drunk.”

“I know.”

“You seemed…really upset.”

“I know.”

“You were gone by the time I woke up.” Your voice is quiet, “I was worried about you, Jimin.”

“I…” Jimin takes a deep breath, “I’m sorry. I was just having a rough day and I don’t know, is it really that strange to think I could find comfort in you?”

“I don’t know if it’s strange but I do know it’s…”

“No, I get it.” He sighs out, “Don’t overthink it. We’re kind of…friends, right? Leaning on a friend, isn’t so hard to believe.”

“Why did you leave without saying anything?” The words leave in a whisper and Jimin feels himself shrinking. Maybe sneaking out in the morning wasn’t a brave move but he didn’t want to face you after the night he had.

“I’m sorry.” He decides to say, his words are tender and you know he means them.

“Whatever happened…in New York…you can tell me.” You finally feel the courage to ask him about his life, about what’s going on with him. You hear a sharp intake of breath on the other side of the phone. It’s silent for a moment before Jimin clears his throat.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He finally says.

“I’m serious, Jimin…oh, hold on.” You tell him, bringing your phone from your ear to the front of your face. You see that Namjoon is calling you. Oh yeah.

“Hey, I’m getting another call. Let’s talk later though, okay? Hang around more.”

“Okay.” Jimin’s soft voice is barely heard. “Goodnight.” And then you’re accepting your other call.

“Hello?”

“Hey!” Namjoon’s deep voice is nice and cheery on the other line, “I was just calling to see what you were up to.”

“Oh nothing.” You smile, “Just lazing around on the couch.”

“Sounds like a wonderful Monday evening.” He chuckles, “Want some company? If you’re still down, of course. I know it isn’t exactly early.”

“Hmm.” You hum, thinking about it. “Sure. I have a bottle of wine we could drink.”

“I’ll bring some snacks.”

It takes less than 30 minutes for Namjoon to be knocking on your front door. When you open the door he stands here, tall, dimpled smile and holding a bag of snacks and an extra bottle of wine.

“Just in case we drink the one you have too quickly.” He winks, still standing outside the door, waiting for you to invite him inside.

“Your brain is so amazing.” You smile cheekily, opening the door wider to let him in. Namjoon comes inside, slipping off his shoes and makes his way into your kitchen.

“Wine glasses?” He asks over his shoulder as he sets down the bottle of wine and bag of snacks. He stands next to the sink, in front of some cabinets, “I’m guessing it’s one of these ones…” He says under his breath, opening each cabinet until he’s smiling in satisfaction when the wine glasses are revealed to him.

You walk towards the kitchen, making your way to the island to see what snacks he brought. You glance up, noticing Namjoon walking in your direction, glasses in hand.

“I think we can pair these chips with red wine for sure.” He smirks, “I think they will go lovely together.”

“Hm, I would have to say I agree.” You gently take the bag of chips from his hands, opening it quickly and stuffing your hand inside, grabbing a few chips. “Let’s see.”

“I’ll pour the wine then!” Namjoon tells you but instead he just watches you chew like, five chips at a time, his smile widening. “I guess you like these chips.” He gestures towards the bag, “I guessed.”

“You’re an excellent guesser.” You mumble, mouth full. “Wine opener.” You point towards the drawer on the other side.

Namjoon nods, walks to the drawer and rummages through it until he finds what he is looking for. He opens the wine bottle…quite clumsily. The cork gets stuck half way through and Namjoon looks to you for help. You can’t help but giggle and assist.

Two glasses filled with the wine he brought and a bowl of chips sits between you both as you sit on your sofa. He tells you about his day…you get lost in his words, he speaks so animatedly about his new project that he’s running by his publisher.

“I have always done non-fiction.” He tells you, “Since forever. But I don’t know, I really want to explore other genres, you know? I have this fun idea for an adventure type novel—fiction. But no one seems convinced.” Namjoon brings his glass of wine to his lips, taking a couple of sips before lowering it back to his lap. “I should ‘stick to what I know’ but would it be that odd?”

“I don’t think so.” You shrug, “I mean, I don’t really know anything about all that stuff…but if it’s good then it’s good, right?”

“Maybe they just don’t think it’s good then.” He smiles, regardless of this topic being a downer for him. “I guess I just have to keep reworking it until it’s something that’s approved.”

“I think I’m pretty decent at story telling?” You tilt your head before laughing, “Well, not writing it all down but just ideas in general…if you ever want some help? Or just someone to help motivate you or uh, keep you inspired, I guess.”

“Really?” Namjoon’s face lights up instantly, his smile more genuine now. “That means a lot to me, y/n. Seriously.” His free hand finds yours, giving you a light squeeze. You think he would let go soon after, but his hand reminds on yours.

“How much of your new story did you share? Did you receive notes?”

“Ah, a pretty good amount. They say it lacks…depth?” He smiles again. “I need to figure out how to build this world a little better I guess.”

“I remember in a creative writing class I took—”

“You took a creative writing class?! How was it? Did you like it?”

“I liked the creative part…as for the actual writing…” You start to giggle, he joins as he gets the hint.

“I see.” He laughs again. “Well, maybe with your creativity and my writing skill, we could create something really memorable.”

“You better dedicate this whole new book to me.” You tease, making Namjoon chuckle some more, his thumb brushing against yours.

“You can be my inspiration and I’ll let the whole world know it.”

You’re well aware you feel affected. Namjoon is smooth with his words for sure…he knows how to make you feel flustered, with what he says with his deep voice alone. You aren’t going to pretend that his thumb playing with yours doesn’t make you feel butterflies. Light touching can feel as powerful as any other touch…you’re enjoying it.

“Besides your new book in the works, what else is going on with you? What don’t I know about Kim Namjoon?”

“Hmm.” He brings his glass to his mouth again, small sips. “There’s a lot you don’t know, right?”

“That’s true. I know you have a sister…I know you like literature, umm…working out.” You slide your hand out from under his and go to pinch his bicep, teasing him.

“You’re right about those three things.” He laughs, rubbing the spot you just pinched. “I also like watching movies, visiting new places and seeing live music shows.”

“What a coincidence” You put a hand to your mouth, acting surprised, “I also like those things as well.”

“Great, I have date ideas already.” His hand finds yours again, resting on your thigh. “I say we go in that order…movie date…exploring a city date and seeing an artist we like live date.”

“I love these ideas. Hm, is this a date?” You ask, sweet smile on your lips.

“I’ll treat any moment I spend with you as a date, if that’s what you’d like.” He squeezes your hand before slightly leaning in. “If I kiss you that makes it more official, right?”

“I would say so.”

Namjoon smiles before leaning all the way into your space, his lips warm on your own. It feels pretty comfortable…having him close. Your heart isn’t going insane like how it was when…when Jimin…stop, don’t think about Jimin in a moment like this. You decide to focus on the feeling of Namjoon’s lips on yours. He doesn’t linger though, he’s already detaching himself from you and you frown, cutely. At least Namjoon thinks so.

“The night’s still young.” He whispers. “I would still like to get to know you more.”

“Not fair.” You pout, “But smart.”

“Smart how?”

“You give me just a taste…making me want more. That’s your plan, right?”

Namjoon chuckles, nodding his head in agreement. “Ah. You got me.”

“I knew it.”

“So,” You decide to take some sips of your wine, emptying the glass. “I am going to grab some more…do you want a refill as well?” You use your chin to point towards his glass.

“Yes please.” He says chugging back the remainder before handing you his glass. “Can you also bring some more snacks? There’s a bag of these chocolates.”

“Kay.”

You try to be quick in the kitchen, carefully making your way back to Namjoon with a bag of chocolates between your side and arm, your hands carrying two glasses of wine. He grins at you when you take a seat next to him again, you find yourself sitting a bit closer than before.

“So,” You take a big gulp of your drink. “You have been in love before?” You get straight to the stuff you really want to know. Namjoon looks a little surprised but he’s all smiles while nodding his head.

“A couple of times?” He tilts his head, dimples on display. “I’ve had a couple of serious girlfriends.” He confirms for you. “There was a lot of love there.”

“Oh.” You raise your brows, “You’ve experienced love more than once…does that exist?” You can’t help but laugh a little. “Do you ever look back and think like, ‘maybe it wasn’t love…’ or something like that?”

“Never.” He tells you truthfully. “Maybe things weren’t meant to be. But I valued the time I had spent with each person…I put my all in a relationship,” He begins explaining, “It’s important to me for both me and my partner to be on the same page so we can enjoy our time together fully…without being too worried about future concerns…’what if we break up?’ or ‘we may not still know each other 2 years from now?’ well,” Namjoon looks up towards the ceiling, gathering the rest of his thoughts, “I don’t think it matters to be concerned about things that we know nothing about yet…we should just enjoy the present moment. So I did. Even if things ended…I still cherish that time because I got to learn so much.”

“Wow.” You blink at him, impressed with his maturity and outlook on relationships.

“The ones from my past…while I no longer have deep feelings for them, I still wish them well in their lives and hope the best for them. I would never talk down on a past partner either…no need to be bitter about something that just wasn’t fated, I guess.” Namjoon nods his head like he is completely satisfied with what he’s said.

“Fate?” You look down at the glass in your hands. “I hear fate can be pretty funny.”

“Well, let’s not leave everything to fate though.” Namjoon gazes at you, his eyes are soft. “We can choose our own destiny too.”

“You’re right.” You look back up, locking eyes with him. “I think the destiny I choose for tonight is to watch a movie.” You cheese at him and he agrees quickly. You turn your TV on, finding a movie on Netflix and letting it play. Both of your wine glasses are empty again so you place them on the coffee table. Little by little with each minute that passes in this movie, you and Namjoon somehow scoot closer and closer to one another.

His hand is on your bare thigh, just caressing your skin so innocently. Your shorts expose a lot of skin and Namjoon is having a hard time not exploring every inch but he stays where you can see him. He whispers some words throughout the movie making you giggle, his guesses on where the plot is going always wrong. When he leans in again to say something else in your ear, you decide to turn your head towards him. There’s a moment where neither of you say anything.

You’re the one who makes a move first this time. You lean in, your lips landing on his. Namjoon is quick to respond, his hand going into your hair, his gentle touch making you push yourself further into him. He starts moving his lips against yours, his grip in your hair getting a little tighter as you two kiss longer. You’re not sure how long you two have been locking lips but somehow it’s long enough that it’s gotten heated to the point that he’s pulling you into his lap.

Straddling his hips and wrapping your hands around his neck, you kiss him deeper and deeper. His tongue is warm and wet, slipping between your lips when you part them to release a soft almost silent moan. Namjoon’s hands begin exploring your backside, running his fingers up and down the entirety of your back…he hesitates on grabbing a handful of your ass but when he hears you moan again into his mouth he finds himself going for it.

He pushes your hips down, grinding into his. You love the feeling of grinding into his crotch, his length hard against your core. You kiss him harder…the entire experience getting hotter and sloppier as the seconds pass. Namjoon leaves your mouth just to trail kisses alongside your jaw, you continue rolling your hips into his as he finds himself sucking into the skin of your neck.

Your eyes are closed, squeezing shut so tightly as you try to focus on all the different feelings going on. You’re aching. You’re feeling a little desperate at this point. You want to feel more. More, more, more. Namjoon is still kissing your neck and although it feels good…he’s barely just missing your sweet spot. Jimin knew exactly where to attach his lips. The thought of Jimin has you grinding harder, you can’t help but wonder if you had let him kiss you the last time if he would have kissed you in all the spots that drive you crazy.

Namjoon still sucks into your skin and you grow impatient. He isn’t finding it. You roll your head back, trying to give him easier access but still nothing. Namjoon’s hands are tight on your hips, rocking you back and forth onto his crotch. His hands begin to rise up, moving underneath your shirt. You feel his fingers skid across your bare stomach, going higher and higher.

Fuck, you can’t help but let your mind wander…what would have happened if you had let Jimin kiss you? Would you be like how you are right now? Sitting in his lap? No, no this is wrong. So fucking wrong. But your heart is doing that unstoppable pounding again…thinking of the man you used to lose yourself to.

Namjoon’s lips find yours again, he kisses you over and over. Both of you out of breath, getting so excited of all this new touch territory. But you realize you haven’t touched him really…you should, right? But for some reason your fingers ache to touch someone’s skin so badly that isn’t Namjoon. You hate this. Fuck, you need to focus. You grab Namjoon’s face in your hands, your eyes gazing into his lustful ones. He looks amazing like this, you think. But the face you wanted to see keeps burning itself into your mind. This is fucked up. This is fucked up. You start to feel overwhelmed. This isn’t right.

“Hey, hey.” Namjoon looks into your eyes, the lust subsiding as sincerity takes over. “Are you okay?” His hands slide down your sides, leaving the inside of your shirt.

“What?” You breathe out, your eyes full of worry giving you away. “Um, yeah.”

“Are you sure? Do you want to stop? Are we going too fast?” Namjoon is so soft with you, so genuine that it makes you feel like shit. It’s not like you were fantasizing about another man as you two were…it’s just…Jimin’s been on your mind because of how worried you were and he almost kissed you! So, of course it’s going to fuck with you.

“I think maybe…” You bite onto your bottom lip, “I’m sorry.” And you really are. “Maybe we can just chill…cuddle? Finish this movie? I’m just—”

“You don’t need to explain, y/n.” Namjoon’s lips curve into a tender smile, “Or apologize.”

“I am sorry though…”

“Why?” His thumb goes to your cheek, rubbing it softly. “It’s okay. I wasn’t expecting anything, you know? I’m just enjoying my time with you…we don’t have to…” He gestures between your bodies.

“I want to though.” You whisper, feeling pathetic.

“When the time is right.”

You feel bad, obviously. Namjoon is so caring and amazing and you hate that your mind was distracted. You feel guilty and you don’t even know why. Well, you know why but you don’t really know why. You didn’t lie to him…in fact, Namjoon is like, the only one you aren’t currently lying to. But you seriously didn’t lie to him! You don’t have lingering feelings for Jimin. You just think because of the recent situation that your mind is a little hazy. You and Namjoon spend the rest of the night cuddling and watching another movie. He leaves around 1 am, a simple kiss to your cheek.

~~~~~~~~~~

“I am so fucking hungry.” Hoseok leans onto the side of your desk, “Hurry up so we can go!”

“Hold on, hold on.” You keep your eyes on your computer screen, your fingers busy typing.

“Lucy said she’s already on the way.” Hoseok tells you, “I’ll go tell Naomi and Jeremy to wrap it up too so we can leave.”

“Kay.” You whisper nonchalantly, your focus still on the work in front of you.

“Oh perfect.” You hear Hoseok cheer loudly, “I was just about to go find you guys!” He’s obviously speaking to Naomi and Jeremy now, you wouldn’t actually know since your eyes haven’t left the screen but it’s a solid assumption.

“Can’t do lunch today.” Naomi walks closer to you both, you tear your eyes away from the screen for a moment to look at her.

“Why not?” You ask, obnoxious pout on your lips.

“I have to finish up something that was needing to be done since like, yesterday. And Jeremy is going to help me.”

“I am?” Jeremy asks, caught off guard as he comes near your desk as well.

“Yes! You said you would! You know I lied about being proficient on excel. But you…excel…at it.” Naomi winks lamely, making Jeremy groan.

“God, I would be fine with helping you a little more if your jokes didn’t seriously suck.”

“I’m with Jeremy on this one.” You say, laughing. “Well, we’ll miss you both. Guess it’s just me, Hobi and Lucy today.”

“Oh, Lucy says Jimin is coming too actually.” Hoseok comments with a shrug, “Double date, I guess.”

With the four of you? You know how messy all of your intertwined connections are here with this particular group…you wonder…just who is on a date with who? Pushing that thought away you nod, closing down your computer for while you’re gone.

You guys meet at your usual place, they have a great lunch menu and the service is really fast. Not to mention, it’s only a 5 minute walk from your workplace. You and Hoseok are seated next to one another, fighting over lunch options—he wants to get his usual sandwich with chips this time instead of fries. You want him to get fries because you always steal some. He wants you to get your usual side of fruit because he wants to steal some strawberries but you want to get a soup instead. While you two bicker, Lucy announces her and Jimin’s arrival.

“Hi friends.” Lucy squeals happily. Her cheeks are nice and rosy, her smile as soft and pretty as she is. She hugs you first then goes to Hoseok, her embrace lasting a second longer with him than you.

“Hey.” Jimin stands next to you, his face also a bit rosy. He looks at you with a gaze so…confused. He’s standing here wondering…does he hug you? You look at him just as awkwardly, wondering what to expect. Jimin smiles, his eyes looking around before they fall back on you and then he’s lifting his hand up. Is he…is he offering a fucking high five? You force a small chuckle as you reach for his hand, he grabs your hand when yours is flat against his and shakes it around a bit. This couldn’t be any more fucking weird. And now you actually laugh and he does too.

“Hi.” You say.

“What’s up bro!” Hoseok looks at Jimin with a wide smile. “Been a while!”

“Ah, yeah.” Jimin nods, taking a seat across from you. Lucy shakes her head around, noticing the table is only for four.

“Uh…where’s Naomi and Jeremy?” She asks, confused yet still taking the only empty seat, next to Jimin and across from Hoseok.

“They couldn’t make it today.” You go back to looking at the menu. “Seriously Hobi…you aren’t getting fries?”

“And you aren’t getting fruit?” He throws back at you, “I want strawberries.”

“And I want fries.”

“Why don’t…you just order fruit? And you order fries?” Lucy asks, cute confusion on her features.

“Because I want chips.” Hoseok shrugs.

“And I want soup.” You shrug in unison with Hoseok. “Come on!”

“Well, I could get fruit, Hobi?” Lucy peaks over her own menu, “I am feeling some pineapple today.”

“Really?!” Hoseok sets his menu down and gives Lucy a thumbs up. “You’re the best.”

“Wow, what about me?” You deadpan.

“I am getting fries, y/n.” Jimin doesn’t look up at you as he peruses his own menu. “You can have some if you want.”

“Oh.” You nod slowly. “Uh, okay.”

“Perfect! We’re like such a perfect little group.” Lucy grins, her smile lines not disappearing even as she drops her smile to look at her menu again.

“I’ll be back. Gotta use the restroom! Hoseok, if the server comes by can you order for me?”

“Your usual?” He asks, “But with the tomato soup, right?”

“That’s the one!” You say before getting up and leaving for the bathroom.

“Hmm,” Lucy’s eyes scan the menu before she’s setting it down, completely abandoning it. “I don’t know why I’m acting like I’m going to get something different.” She giggles before glancing over at Hoseok. “What about you?”

“Same sandwich as usual.” He looks up at her, smile in place. “You know I am a creature of habit.”

“I do know that.” Lucy giggles, “I also know you love these strawberries…hmm, should I get an extra side of dipping sauce?”

“The dipping sauce here…is truly the way to my heart.” Hoseok teases. “You’re willing to spend a little extra just for me?”

“Well, your happy face when you eat makes it worth it!” Lucy giggles again, her conversation with Hoseok so effortless.

“I knew you had a thing for my face.”

“Only when you’re eating.”

“Oh come on! Look at it. Look at it.” Hoseok starts doing model poses, showing off his face. “You love it.”

“I love it when that thing,” She points at his mouth, “Doesn’t open and talk.” Lucy starts laughing now.

“Wow,” Hoseok acts shocked, “Where did you learn to burn me like that? It was y/n wasn’t it…”

“She’s just so good at comebacks. I figured I should learn one or two to keep up with you guys.”

“Well, stop!” Hoseok chuckles, “Stop learning that kind of stuff! I was so shocked. Very out of character.”

“Am I only ever supposed to be nice to you?” Lucy teases.

“Yes!”

“Fine. I’ll go back to my usual self…oh, Hobi, my dear friend—"

“Did you two ever date?” Jimin suddenly asks, his eyes on Lucy and Hoseok. He blinks at the two, genuine curiosity in his eyes.

“W-What?” Lucy stutters understandably so, her entire face gone red. “What are you talking about, Jimin?” She laughs awkwardly, “Don’t you think that’s something I would have told you?”

“I don’t know.” He shrugs, looking back at the menu in his hands. “You two just seem really close.” It’s an observation he made literally right now. Why didn’t he notice it before? It’s not like he hasn’t hung around Lucy and Hoseok before but he never realized how they seemed around one another…maybe it’s because he’s always paying attention to you when you’re all together. And right now you aren’t here.

“Well, we are friends.” Lucy’s face is a deep, deep red now. “I mean, Hobi and y/n are even closer than me and Hobi…did you think they’ve dated too?” She continues to laugh awkwardly.

“No.” Jimin shakes his head with a smile. “Just forget it.” He glances at her, his smile still plastered on his face. “I was just asking! Nothing to get embarrassed about.”

“I’m—I’m not embarrassed.” Lucy looks down, picking up her menu again like she doesn’t already know what she’s getting.

“Yeah!” Hoseok chuckles. “Stop looking so embarrassed, makes it seem like you’d be ashamed to have dated me!” He teases, giving her a grin. But Lucy just focuses on the menu and doesn’t respond.

“Ew, who is dating you?” You wonder out loud as you make your way back to your chair.

“You say ‘ew’ but you know if we didn’t know each other, you would totally go for me at a bar.” Hoseok pinches your side and you yelp.

“One, ow! And two, I so would not.” You roll your eyes, cheeky smile in place. “I would go for someone dark and mysterious. There’s nothing mysterious about you.”

“I can be totally mysterious.”

“I’m with y/n on this one.” Lucy lowers her menu again, finally only a shade of pink at this point. “But I think it’s your charm that you’re such an open book even from the get go.”

“You think I have charm? Yet you’re embarrassed to have hypothetically dated me?!”

“Huh?” You glance around the table, Lucy blushing again, Jimin smiling and Hoseok looking at Lucy incredulously.

“Nothing, nothing.” Jimin sings, “We haven’t ordered yet.”

“Oh.” You look around, catching the attention of one of the servers. You four order your drinks and food and continue on with conversation.

“So Jimin, I heard you were visiting your parents a couple days ago? How was that?” Hoseok takes the first bite into his sandwich, followed by some chips.

“Oh, it was nice.” Jimin picks up a fry and passes it to your plate, “Here.”

“What did you guys do?” Lucy asks.

“I mostly helped my mom paint one of their spare rooms. A yellow, if you can believe it. But like, a soft yellow so it looks nice.”

“I’m surprised,” You slurp some soup but immediately regret it because it’s super hot. “Ouch, I burned my tongue.” You whine, “Anyway, I’m surprised you helped. Don’t you hate the smell of paint?”

“Yeah, but she gets so moody if I don’t help.” Jimin laughs, “She’s not one to mess with!”

“Makes sense, makes sense.” You nod, blowing on your soup now.

“You don’t like the smell of paint?” Lucy wonders, “I didn’t know that. Wait, y/n…how did you know that?” Her innocent eyes find yours and you immediately look at Jimin, slight panic on your face but Jimin saves you.

“I mentioned it last time we were all together, I think? Right?” He looks at you, placing another fry on your plate.

“Oh, right.” You nod quickly. “I couldn’t remember clearly since we were all drunk.”

“I think I remember too.” Hoseok nods as well, all nonchalant. His memory obviously not the best and you couldn’t be more grateful.

“Oh damn.” Lucy slouches, “Sorry, I will try to be a better listener!” She promises with a grin before taking a sip of water.

“You’re a perfect listener, don’t worry Lucy.” You smile at her, feeling a bit of guilt. “I’m surprised your parents weren’t there on opening night?” You look at Jimin now and he can see just how happy you are about that. If they were there…well, there goes your whole cover.

“Yeah, they’re waiting until the last show to come.”

“Wow!” Hoseok looks between Lucy and Jimin. “This mean you’re going to meet his parents, right? That’s a big step, you two.”

“I mean, very briefly.” Lucy mumbles, feeling herself blush again. “Jimin has plans with them, right? Dinner?”

“Yeah, I’m going to have some dinner with them to celebrate the shows being over for this particular production.” Jimin confirms Lucy’s correct assumption.

“But Lucy…isn’t going with you guys?” Hoseok asks, his face falling a bit more serious. “Why not?” He asks. “Why—”

“He wants to spend time with his parents, Hobi.” Lucy rushes to say, “It’s cool that I’m not going, seriously.”

“Stop.” You swat Hoseok’s arm. He looks a bit displeased but he gets the hint and zips his mouth shut.

“Anyway,” You gladly try to change the subject, “Where are you guys going to eat? If your parents like ramen, there’s this great place downtown.” You shoot Jimin a knowing look, you obviously know how much his parents love ramen.

“Ah, really?” Jimin smirks at you, “Can you text me the address to it?”

“Sure.” You pull out your phone and then you snap your head in Lucy’s direction, “Uh, but I don’t have your contact info.” You lie, “Can you put it in?”

“Ah, right.” Jimin tries to hold in a smile that is threatening to spread across his face.

You hand Jimin your phone and he taps away for a moment and then hands it back to you.

“Thanks.” You say, looking down at the screen, trying not to react in any kind of way when you see Jimin opened up his messages and wrote a text.

‘You’re wearing lavender today…kind of reminds me of something;)’

“Ah, yup.” You blink at him, trying not to show your amusement. “I will send you that address.”

“Thanks.”

“What ramen place?” Lucy chews on her lunch, “Wait, that one near the gym you used to go to?”

“Uh huh.” You focus on your soup again, “It’s good, right?”

“That place is amazing! You have to go there with your parents, Jimin!”

“Since Lucy likes it too you should take her as well—”

“Dude.” You glare at Hoseok and he raises his hands up in surrender.

“I can take you there another time, Lucy.” Jimin smiles at her, “If you want.”

“Thanks, Jimin.” She mumbles, clearly a bit embarrassed. “We should all go sometime actually. Don’t you think this group is a good one?” Lucy grins now, “Although I am missing Naomi and Jeremy’s usual banter.”

“Same.” You reach for the fries Jimin had given you and stuff them in your mouth, Jimin smiles at your eagerness and places a few more fries onto your plate. “Oh, thanks.”

“I think it’s only fair I have a bite of your soup, though.” Jimin eyes your bowl of soup, licking his lips in anticipation. “Can I?”

“Sure.” You chuckle, handing him your spoon. “Oh wait…do you want a different spoon? I used this one?”

“Isn’t it fine?” He tilts his head, his mind going to the obvious. You two have shared enough in the past, plus you two have done worse.

“You and Hoseok share all the time.” Lucy shrugs, taking a bite of her own food. “What’s the big deal?”

“We all share, I guess. Okay, here.” You slide your bowl of soup over to Jimin and he is already blowing on it before taking a bite.

“Mm.” He groans, “This is so good.”

“I know, right?” You start to bring the bowl back but Jimin’s hand lands on yours as he stops you.

“No, one more bite!” He whines cutely, taking another spoonful for himself.

Lucy looks over at Jimin and giggles to herself, “I don’t think I have ever seen you whine before.” She points out, “You’re usually so…I don’t know. But cute!” Lucy gushes, “So cute.”

“y/n tells me I’m annoying when I get whiney.” Hoseok chuckles, “But Jimin gets ‘cute’ lucky you.”

“Ah.” Jimin sits up straighter, “I just really like soup.”

You gaze in Jimin’s direction, your mind replaying his ‘cute’ moment of being ‘whiney’ just now. It reminds you so much of Jimin from the past…you feel like little by little he’s showing his true self again. Maybe he hasn’t changed as much as you thought he has?

“You guys will not believe this!” Naomi pokes her head in your desks direction, her voice filling the area. You, Hoseok and Jeremy all glance towards her and collectively ask her ‘what’.

“I just won one of those Instagram giveaway competition type thing!”

“You’re right, I don’t believe. Scam.” Jeremy mumbles more to himself, eyes going back to his work.

“It’s not a scam! It’s legit!” Naomi defends, “Anyway, aren’t you guys going to ask what it is?”

“Fine.” You say lazily, “What is it?”

“Dinner reservation for four at the fanciest restaurant in a 100 mile radius.”

“Huh?”

“Dinner reservation for four!” Naomi says more excited now, “Come on, guys!”

“Where? There ain’t anything that fancy here.” Hoseok tells her, paying more attention to his phone than this conversation.

“Fancy ass place in (Big city near you)!”

“Eh,” You click your tongue, “That’s an hour drive dude.”

“It’s free…three course meal. All free.” She says with a smirk, knowing this will change all of your minds.

“Free?” Jeremy is the first to confirm if he had heard that right.

“Free.” She repeats.

“You know, suddenly fancy ass dinner sounds very appealing.” Hoseok puts his phone down, “Do we get to dress fancy too?”

“Obviously. We have to post pictures on the gram and tag the people and what not. So we might as well look fucking amazing.”

“I always look fucking amazing.” You say, “But I am willing to look even more so for a free meal at a fancy place that is no doubt not in any of our budgets.”

“This place has a gorgeous balcony with a gorgeous view of the city.”

“I am also a gorgeous view—” You’re cut off when Hoseok throws a paper ball at you, laughing alongside Jeremy and Naomi. “Whatever.” You laugh as well.

“So when is it? Our reservation?” Jeremy asks, feeling himself get all hyped for the event.

“This Friday at 7 pm!”

“Oh, are you fucking kidding me?” Jeremy is slumping his shoulders, his expression gone sour. “My sister and her husband are coming to town on Friday and they’re staying with me.”

“Ditch them.” You say, wiggling your brows but Jeremy just scoffs.

“You’ve met my sister. If I ditched them she would seriously murder me.”

“Oh, I would love to see that.” Naomi teases, “But seriously? You aren’t going to come?”

“Seriously.” Jeremy frowns. “Can’t you try to get it for another day?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Naomi’s lips pull down as well, “Sorry Jer.”

“Yeah, that sucks.” You say, also feeling a bit bad.

“We will wish you were with us.” Hoseok nods along as well, joining in on the sad fest.

“Guess we can just invite Lucy in his place?” Naomi suggests and you and Hoseok brighten instantly.

“Ah, perfect!” you cheer dramatically, “You’re so smart Naomi, always coming up with solutions.”

“Yes, yes!” Hoseok starts throwing his fist up in celebration.

“Wow.” Jeremy deadpans. “You guys moved on from me real fast.”

“R.I.P.”

~~~~~~~~~

It’s around 4:30 when you get home from work, which is pretty late for a Friday…you usually leave around 3 but you had some things you needed to take care of before the weekend. You don’t want to rush, it really doesn’t take you too long to get ready but well, knowing you’re on a stricter timeline stresses you a little more.

It’s maybe a little after 5 when you finally start on your hair and makeup and around 5:45 when you’re actually dressed. You look nice, you would have to admit. You didn’t want to overdo it, of course. You know Naomi sent you some photos of her outfit for tonight through text yesterday. She chose a cute green dress. It’s casual enough but also fancy enough. You aren’t sure what Lucy’s attire is but you decided on a silky looking orange romper. It’s cute…but is it really worth it for when you have to pee?

You’re feeling a little relaxed, knowing you have around 15 minutes to spare. Wow, queen of time, apparently. You decide to go to your kitchen and pour yourself a glass of water, you’re careful not to get too much lipstick on the cup. You can hear your phone vibrating on the kitchen island and you wonder if it’s Hoseok letting you all know he’s on his way. You walk towards the counter and much to your surprise, it’s Jimin.

“Hello?” Your phone is to your ear as you gulp some more water.

“Hey.” Jimin greets you, his tone light and smooth. “Whatcha doing?”

“Drinking water.” You say, “Hence the loud gulping you are probably hearing.”

“Oh that? Yeah, I was wondering. I thought you had a dog or something.”

“I’m hanging up.”

“I’m kidding! I’m kidding!” Jimin’s laugh is loud and wholehearted. “Ah, I’m on my way home from work right now. We don’t have shows this weekend.”

“Oh yeah. I remember Lucy mentioning that earlier this week.”

“It feels nice to kind of just relax.”

“I bet.”

“But I am hungry.” He tells you, groaning when he thinks of food. “You talked about ramen the other day and I have been craving it ever since!”

“You called me to…chat?” You realize and wonder out loud. Is this normal now? Is this the new normal between you and Jimin?

“Yeah?” he asks innocently. You can hear muffling in the background, suddenly the sound of a door opening and closing. “I just got home.”

“Oh.” You nod though he can’t see you. “That’s good.”

“Mhm.” He agrees, then he starts telling you about his day. You find yourself sitting down at the kitchen island and listening to him. You know this should be weirder, right? But you both carry conversation easily. Minutes tick by. You laugh when he puts himself on mute so he can pee, making you talk about your day in return while you speak to the silent line.

“Okay, I’m back.” Jimin laughs, “Remember when we did that when we first started dating? Just went on mute when we had to use the bathroom and the other just had to basically talk to themselves in the meantime.”

You’re laughing too. “Oh my god, my friends used to drag me for that.”

“There are some things we should just keep private.” Jimin snorts, “Anyway, doesn’t ramen sound good?”

The mention of food has you remembering your fucking fancy ass plans! You pull your phone away from your ear and look at the time. It’s already 6:05.

“Shit,” You bring the phone the back to your ear, “Actually I—”

“Should we order in some ramen and have a movie night or something?”

“I have to—wait, what?” You are a bit caught off guard, “Are you asking me to hang out? Like…intentionally?”

“Yeah?”

“Oh.”

“Is that such a problem?” Jimin sighs out, “It’s just ramen and movies. Two things I know you like.”

“I don’t know if that’s really? Appropriate? I guess?”

Jimin releases a breath, “It isn’t a big deal?”

“Well, it doesn’t really matter. I have plans actually and I am running late for them.”

“Oh?”

“Fancy ass dinner reservations with Hobi, Naomi and Lucy.” You quickly explain, skipping around your place trying to find your purse.

“Oh yeah. Lucy did mention something like that.” He sounds a bit disappointed. “Okay. I’ll let you go then. Have fun.”

“Thanks, Jimin.” You say, quickly pressing the end button and you rush to put on your shoes so you can leave.

Even though you are a few minutes late…you and Hoseok still manage to be the first ones there, waiting outside the restaurants entrance. It takes a few minutes of waiting but finally Naomi arrives and you three wait at the front still, knowing Lucy is not too far behind.

“I haven’t eaten since breakfast.” You tell your friends, “I am saving room for all this free food. I want to eat as much as possible. Get my free moneys worth.”

“You realize you can just get things in to go box, right?” Hoseok shakes his head. “Seriously, you know that, right? Like, if you don’t finish—”

“Where’s the fun in that?” You wave him off, “Anyway, is dessert including?” You glance at Naomi who just shrugs. “To be honest I have no idea what a three course meal even means.”

“Same.” Naomi and Hoseok say in unison.

“Sounds like a rich person thing.”

“You guys are so funny,” Lucy’s voice is suddenly heard, “It’s appetizer, main meal and dessert.”

“Woah.” Hoseok’s jaw is basically on the concrete ground. “Luce, you look…”

“This? It’s new! Pretty, right?” Lucy does a little twirl, her baby pink dress making her look like a ballerina.

“I love it!” Naomi claps, “Is that the one you said you got on a good deal?”

“Yup!”

“How good of a deal? Where?” You ask, “Are they still having deals?!”

“Seriously,” Hoseok clears his throat, unable to tear his eyes away from Lucy. “You look really beautiful.”

“Wow, where the hell were our compliments?” You elbow Hoseok in his side, knocking him out of his obvious daze.

“Right?” Naomi crosses her arms over her chest, waiting expectantly.

“What?” Hoseok blinks at you both.

“We’re waiting.” You drag out the words in a sing song tune.

“Oh for fucks sake.” He chuckles now, rolling his eyes. “You’re both pretty too whatever, whatever. Let’s go, since we’re all here.”

Maybe the drive was worth it. This restaurant has three levels! An elevator! Two different balconies! Each with their own glamourous bar! It’s breathtaking, honestly. And looks expensive as hell. Which makes this even better since you aren’t actually paying. Hehe.

“Excuse me?” Naomi waves down the man who sat you all, “This is all already taken care of, right? We can order whatever we want?” She has to make sure this is really real.

“Yes mam.” The young guy smiles at her, “It’s already been taken care of. Order whatever you like.” He’s about to walk away when Naomi stops him.

“Wait, wait.” She grins politely. “Drinks too?”

“Yes mam. We already have a bottle prepared for your table.” He tells you, eyeing you all as he sees how very obviously excited you all got at the mention of free alcohol.

“This fucking rocks.” Hoseok looks at the menu, “I don’t even see prices…that’s how you know we ain’t meant in a place like this.”

“For real.” You nod along, “But well, if we must. Then we must.”

“You guys always make fun of me for tagging you guys in those posts…but it paid off, didn’t it?” Naomi raises her brows at you all, “Admit it.”

“Fine, fine.” You start dramatically bowing in her direction. “You’re amazing. You’re above us all.”

“I know.” She smirks. “How was work for you Lucy?”

“Ah. It was fine.” She smiles, her lips coated in the perfect amount of gloss. “I came here from the theatre, I had to change there.” She giggles, “The director told me I look like a princess and I should audition for the next production.”

“Spoiler alert?!” You act shocked, “The next one will have a princess! Now I have to sit here and think of the million—”

“I don’t know, I don’t know.” Lucy laughs loudly, “But you guys will be the first to know when I find out!”

“I want to be the very first though.” Hoseok glances at Lucy and smirks, “Let’s be honest, out of everyone here I am your number one, right?” he brings his water to his lips.

“Hmm.” Lucy pretends to think, finger on her chin and all. “I don’t know, Hobi. You might be number four here actually.”

“Four?” Hoseok chokes on his drink, “But there’s only three of us?” He points at himself, you and Naomi.

“I’m counting our server as well.” She jokes and you all laugh.

“Wow, your jokes have gotten better, I got to admit.” He shakes his head, still laughing.

“I have to keep up with you guys! How do you guys say your jokes without feeling so bad right after!” Lucy blushes, “I feel bad. I can’t keep up with your guys humor.”

“Just be yourself, Lucy.” You bring your hand to your mouth, covering your laughter. “We need at least one innocent one in the group.”

“Yeah. We can’t all be assholes.” Naomi teases.

“True. You two have got that covered, huh?” Hoseok gestures between you and Naomi and you find his shin and give it a kick. “I have got to stop sitting in front of you! Always fucking kicking me!”

“You need a view of my beautiful face.” You tell him, “Oh, Naomi!” You turn to face her and bring up something work related. You two are chatting about it while Hoseok and Lucy go into their own world, talking quietly between themselves. Your eyes glance to them every now and then and you can’t help but smile a little. Hoseok looks absolutely taken with Lucy. He listens to her, hanging onto every word that falls out of her mouth. You’ve never seen his eyes this full of hearts before…well, Lucy does look exceptionally pretty tonight.

Hoseok’s fingers are in Lucy’s hair, you catch a glimpse of her blushing when he compliments it. You keep talking with Naomi, but you gaze over at those two every few moments. You feel happy that Hoseok is getting some time like this with Lucy…but then you feel your heart crack a little when you remember Lucy is technically (casually?) dating someone else—that someone being your ex—your first and only love.

“Your main meal.” The voice of the server interrupts you all but you are not upset in the least. The smell of the food is making your mouth water. Different staff begin placing plates in front of you all and you don’t waste any time in digging in. It’s not too soon after when dessert is coming next. Good thing you always save room for dessert.

“This is fucking heaven.” You groan, the dessert just absolutely melting in your mouth.

“Don’t get used to heaven.” Hoseok’s eyes roll back into his head when he takes a bite as well.

“Are you saying I’m not getting into heaven?!”

“No, I’m saying you’re never going to experience this rich lifestyle again…so don’t get used to it.” He groans again, the cake melting on his tongue.

“I could always marry rich!” You take another bite, “You never know.”

“Rich men want women who just look pretty.” He tells you.

“I do look pretty?”

“Sure but you also talk too much. You also have an attitude.”

“Rich men don’t want to deal with that.” Naomi agrees, biting her piece of cake as well. “Holy shit this is incredible.”

“Right?” You nod along, “Is it possible to reach orgasm from cake?”

“Oh my god.” Lucy starts laughing, “You’re too much!”

“No, I think you’re on to something, dude.” Naomi takes another bite, “I think orgasm is possible.”

“Stop!” Lucy continues to giggle.

“Why? You just don’t understand because you’re the only one here who’s actually consistently getting some!” Naomi raises a brow at her, “Let us live!”

“True!”

“Well…” Lucy’s laughter dies down just a little, small smile on her face. “I don’t know about all that.”

“Huh?” You stop chewing to look up at Lucy. “You and Jimin…?”

Lucy shifts in her spot, looking a little awkward but her smile remains. Aren’t her and Jimin like, you know, always doing the deed?

“We haven’t really…” She shifts again, “We haven’t really hung like that in a minute now.” She admits. “Just been so busy, you know?”

“Oh, yeah.” Naomi looks at you and Hoseok, her eyes trying to communicate with you both. “That’s totally fine.”

“For sure.” Lucy grins. “It’s not like I’m addicted to sex.” She laughs now. “It’s been nice just hanging out in general, you know?”

“Lucy.” Hoseok sets his fork down and turns his head to look into her eyes.

“Hm?” She gazes back into his and it almost feels intrusive to watch them from across the table.

“Do you like Jimin? Like really? I mean, I get the appeal. Don’t get me wrong, but I just know you and you seem…like…” Hoseok’s words start to trail off but he keeps his gaze on her, waiting for a response. An honest response.

Lucy is quiet for a moment, like she’s really considering his words. She seems hesitant to answer…you know that if you were the one who asked she would be gushing a million yeses. But with Hoseok she hesitates.

“Is there anything else you all need?” The voice of the young server is heard and you all whip your heads in his direction, looking around the table to see if there is anything else. When there’s nothing you all thank him over and over and each of you hand him generous cash tips. He tries to refuse but eventually he accepts, saying his thanks and his goodbyes as you all stand from the table to begin making your exit.

“Bathroom.” Naomi tells you guys, “Anyone else?”

“No.” Hoseok and Lucy say.

“Hm, I could. Or I should, before this drive.” You chuckle, “You guys sure?”

“I don’t. Do you?” Hoseok looks at Lucy and she shakes her head with a smile. “We can wait outside for you guys!”

“Sounds good.” Naomi and you head towards the bathrooms as Hoseok and Lucy go towards the elevators to go back down and outside to the entrance.

Man, you hate that you basically had to get naked just to pee. The things you do for fashion and beauty. You wash your hands when Naomi joins you at the fancy sinks. She chats about how pretty you both look and you guys decide to take some pictures in the full length mirror.

Finally, after like 20 photos later when you guys decided on pictures you could actually agree on, you head out and start making your way downstairs. More pictures in the elevator. You and Naomi exit the revolving doors of the restaurant and are hit with a chilly breeze.

“Damn. Cold as hell.” You mutter.

“Isn’t hell supposed to be hot?”

“Tomato, tomato.” You roll your eyes playfully, “Where’s Hoseok and Lucy?” You glance around but you don’t see them.

“Maybe they went to their cars?” Naomi guesses, “Let’s find them.”

“Kay.” You guys start walking towards the parking lot when you see Hoseok’s back. “Oh! There they are.” You and Naomi walk closer and closer and then it hits you. “What the hell?” You blurt out and immediately Hoseok turns around and faces you both, shock on his face. Lucy standing behind him with obvious panic in her eyes. Were they…were they kissing?

“Oh my god.” Lucy swallows hard, “I am so sorry.” She reaches for Hoseok but then pulls her hand back. “I am so sorry Hobi. I am…I’m so…” She begins apologizing profusely. Her eyes bubbling over with tears, “Shit.” She mutters before wiping at her face. “I…I got to go.” She says, looking between all of you. “I’m sorry Hobi.” She whispers before turning and walking towards her car.

“Lucy—”

“Let her go.” Hoseok tells you, the shock still evident on his face. He blinks at you and Naomi and then shakes his head. “Don’t worry,” He looks at you especially, “I am just as stunned as you are.”

“Uh.” You look at him expectantly, “Care to explain?” your tone is light, teasing even but Hoseok doesn’t seem to be in the mood. “Hey…” you walk forward a bit, “You okay?”

“Lucy kissed you?” Naomi is still processing the situation. Hoseok just nods.

“Did you kiss back?” You ask. He shakes his head.

“What led to the kiss?” Naomi treads carefully, “Like—”

“I don’t know.” Hoseok blinks repeatedly, “Seriously…I don’t know. I mean, we were talking about Jimin but then…”

“Oh my god…” Naomi is suddenly hit with realization. “Is this cheating?” she gasps, “Isn’t she kind of in a thing with Jimin?”

“It’s not cheating.” You gulp, “They aren’t in a relationship…”

“But still, think about how Lucy views things though.”

“Fuck.” Hoseok groans, “She’s right. Lucy is going to…she isn’t going to take this well. She’s going to crumble.”

“Guys. She has said it herself multiple times…she knows they aren’t together, together. They’ve never had the conversation of being exclusive and she said they haven’t even been having sex recently.” You need everyone to think a little more clearly. “Surely she won’t think this is cheating?” But you’re starting to lose confidence in your own argument.

“No, you’re right. She’s a big girl.” Hoseok tries to think rationally. “I’m not convinced she’s really into Jimin, honestly.”

“Fucking obviously,” You snort, “She’s out here kissing you.”

“Too soon for jokes.” Hoseok rolls his eyes.

“It wasn’t a joke though…”

Naomi smiles gently towards you both, knowing what Hoseok probably needs at the moment is his best friend. You.

“I’m going to head home.” She informs you guys, “Text me though if you need anything.” She gives Hoseok a quick hug. “Okay?” “Okay, mom.” He rolls his eyes again and you wave Naomi goodbye.

“By the way, you should leave your mommy kink at home.” You tease Hoseok and he glares at you. “But seriously…” Your voice softens, “Should we go home? Back to your place? Maybe get drunk as fuck? Watch horrible movies and make fun of them? Maybe—”

“I love you.” Hoseok’s eyes find yours, “But honestly, I think I kind of just want to be alone. My minds kind of chaotic at the moment.” He chuckles dryly, “Not really sure I’ve processed things yet. But I’ll call you if I really need you.”

“Okay.” You give your dearest friend your most sincere smile before hugging him tightly. “Also, I love you too.”

“Drive safe.” He squeezes your hands. “I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”

“You too and okie dokie.” You walk to your own car and Hoseok watches you until you get inside before going in his and driving off. Your drive home goes quickly when you’re jamming to your favorite music, singing and dancing along the entire way home.

Your apartment feels so empty. You are kind of sad that Hoseok didn’t want to hang out…but you understand he’s going through some shit. But you’re feeling bored and wanting to be social. You know Naomi is already home in bed when she sent you all the pictures you took tonight and one more of her dog snuggled up with her in bed. Jeremy is with his sister and brother in law. Lucy is…well, she’s occupied. You wonder if Namjoon is available?

You decide to just call him, hoping for good news—that he wants to be on his way in the next five minutes—but unfortunately when he answers, his ‘hello?’ is accompanied by a very noisy background. Apparently he is out with an old friend and will be out for the night. You frown, pulling your blanket around you on your sofa, realizing you are running out of options.

Of course, he came into your mind. But you know just how well, messy that’ll make things—even more messy actually. It’s bad enough that you two are keeping up the appearance that you don’t know one another initially but to also hang out with no one else’s knowledge? Well, it’s too much and you know it. But your mind keeps going back to a few weeks ago.

Jimin was so…the sight of him in your apartment, that drunk and that emotional—it was heartbreaking. You need to find out more. Despite the history between you two there is still a solid connection between you both, platonically, of course. And you don’t want to ignore that and ignore his wellbeing. He needs someone. You wish it could be someone else but it looks like it might have to be you—ha, who’s playing hero now?

Jimin answers your phone call on the first ring. He’s already teasing you when you ask him to hang out. He pretends to give you a hard time but he’s agreeing, smile evident in his voice. You hate that you’re smiling too but you are and you’re just trying to accept it…you don’t have to ignore his existence and avoid him. Fate is pretty funny, so you hear. And maybe fate is bringing you two back for a reason—doesn’t have to mean anything deep or romantic. But it’s for something, right?

“Hm, what movie should we watch?” Jimin brings his beer to his lips, “Something scary, right?”

“No! Let’s watch something with action.” You scroll through Netflix, “Like one of those spy movies.”

“No.” Jimin whines, “How about something funny?”

“Hold on, we can compromise.”

“How so?

“Uh, there’s plenty of action movies that are also funny.” You keep scrolling, “I swear Ryan Reynolds is in every one of those.”

“Good point.” Jimin chuckles, chugging back some more beer. “How was your dinner tonight?”

“Uh.” You. Keep. Scrolling. “It was fine.”

“Oh? Something definitely happened.” Jimin smirks at you, gazing at your side profile. “I know you, remember? I can tell.”

“I am but a mystery.” You try a funny voice, eyes staying on the TV.

“Sure, sure.” Jimin laughs some more, drinking his beer again. “I wonder—oh.” He stops talking to look down at his buzzing phone, you glance his way and see his eyes rolling.

“Ignoring that?” You ask, prying. Jimin slides his phone away from him on the couch cushion and looks at you.

“Yup.” He pops the ‘p’.

“Taehyung?” You ask as nonchalantly as fucking possible. Your eyes staying on the TV. Jimin doesn’t say anything and you start to wonder what expression he has. You slowly turn your head to look at him and he’s got that sly ass smile on his lips.

“How did you know that?” He asks, voice smooth as always.

“Oh, I don’t know.” You blink at him and once again he can tell you are hiding something. His grin only widens when it clicks.

“Did you go through my phone last time I was here?” he asks, voice steady. He doesn’t look mad though, just amused.

“Um,” Well, you know there isn’t any use in fully lying, he will call you out. “I just saw who was texting you last time, that’s all.”

“Mhm, sure.” He chuckles, “I’m sure that that’s all.”

“So.” You pry more carefully, “Why are you ignoring him?”

“ We didn’t agree on some things.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal.

“Well, something happened obviously. Right?”

“Why don’t you tell me?” He challenges with a smirk. “Since you seem to think you know so much about me and my life.”

“It’s not just what I think I know, Jiminie.” You smile towards him, your eyes locking with his intensely now. “It’s what I do know.”

“Is that so babe?” Jimin’s eyes are dark, challenging and amused. He throws in the pet name to irk you since you used his. “Then what do you know?” His smile is wide now.

“Emma.” You say. “Emma Dubois.”

And you have never seen a smile get wiped off someone’s face so fucking quickly. His lips fall into a straight line before he’s parting his lips in genuine confusion.

“Ah, I bet you’re wondering how I know her.” You nod like you understand, “Don’t worry, I don’t mind explaining.”

Jimin’s face is losing all color, every second that passes he pales more and more.

“Your first Broadway show.” You decide to grab the remote and turn the TV off. “Opening night.”

“Op…?”

“She was the lead, right? Anastasia. Wow, she was so beautiful on stage. Somehow even more beautiful off stage though.” You smile, “I really thought so.”

Jimin listens intently, his brows beginning to furrow the more you speak.

“I missed you.” You sigh out, “And I wanted to be with you again…so I went. I went to New York City and saw your opening night performance. Ah, you were amazing as usual.”

“You…you watched the show…?” Jimin feels his throat drying and his chest tightening. “You didn’t say…?”

“I wanted it to be a surprise. It was March, right? So it had been like 6 months since the last time we had seen each other? Well, I waited after the show to find you.”

Jimin feels his grip on the beer bottle tighten, his jaw clenching as he listens to you. You think on your next words…you remember the bouquet of flowers you had gotten him.

“You were talking to so many people…” Your voice is calm as you continue, “Then the girl who played Anastasia had come next to you.”

“Emma…” Jimin whispers.

“Yup, saw her name under ‘Anastasia’ in the playbook. Emma Dubois.” You repeat her name and feel yourself gulp, taking a deep breath. You remember the way he pulled her into his side and kissed her on her lips. It was a private moment…it wasn’t for show. You could tell. You know Jimin and you know when he’s smitten. It was real. He moved on. And you needed to as well.

Jimin stares at you with eyes that feel so distant in this moment, like his thoughts are taking him away to a place he doesn’t know. A place he’s scared of. So you know about Emma, huh? Jimin swallows hard again as he thinks…but what exactly did you know?

#bts #park jimin #bts smut #jimin smut #bts fluff #bts angst #bts fanfic #jimin fanfic #jimin x reader #jimin fluff #jimin angst #love again chapter 4

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