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onceuponakdrama · 2 years

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A Business Proposal KDrama Review —

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Bingo Card for A Business Proposal

Synopsis: Shin Ha Ri is a woman who works for a major food company as a researcher. One day, her best friend, Jin Young Seo, asks for Ha Ri to take her place on a blind date to escape a possible arranged marriage. She even offers Ha Ri some money for her time; despite Ha Ri’s inital rejection, Ha Ri accepts after a family emergency and she becomes strapped for cash. Ha Ri goes on the blind date as Young Seo with the intention of being rejected. However, the blind date is Kang Tae Mu, the new workaholic CEO of the company at which she works at. Kang Tae Mu is on the blind date due to his grandfather, who is worried that he won’t have any grandchildren due to his grandson’s workaholic tendencies. Due to his hatred of wasting time, Tae Mu decides that he will marry the first woman he goes on a blind date with (aka the fake Young Seo). The girls go to celebrate on their supposed blind-date-gone wrong, but Tae Mu calls the real Young Seo and proposes.

Overall Main Plot: Rating - 9 out of 10

While the plot itself is based on the webtoon, I think the overall plot that was protrayed is original. It was interesting to watch, from the character’s dynamics to their development over time as people. I really enjoyed it; it was an actual feel good drama that still was fun to watch. There were lots of twists and turns that made sense and, even as an avid kdrama watcher, I couldn’t predict. The writing itself was rather chessy and tropey, but it was written in a way that worked. It’s hard to explain what made the drama so great, especially since it did have typical kdrama vibes. The appeal of the plot was that it was timed nicely; in the sense that things weren’t dragged out for too long and things were nicely paced. Even with the more “angst” aspects (e.g. Tae Mu’s trauma with rain from losing his parents), it wasn’t too focused as a central point of the drama. The reason it wasn’t a 10 out of 10 was solely due to the last episode. I thought the writers did so great for 11 episodes, but they fell so flat for the last one that it felt like a waste. In episode 12, the writers used the tropes that didn’t work; the writing was slow and overused and it didn’t feel original as the first 11 episodes. I think there are supposed to be a few new episodes that are going to be released, but we still aren’t too sure, so there will def be an update if that comes out.

Characters: Rating - 10 out of 10

↣ Shin Ha Ri [played by Kim Se Jeong] - omg I love Se Jeong. She is such a great actress and her character was so on point. She was the strong female lead that felt very relatable, in the sense that she wasn’t super poor but she had been in debt her whole life (cries in student loans). In my opinion, she didn’t have any big character development growth, but she didn’t need any. Since it was a romance drama, it was more about how her courage to step into this relationship that she wanted. While I’m not all for a woman just having romantic development, it made sense in her character. She needed the courage to be in relationship that she had reasonable concern for. But, overall, she was great and I loved her character; it was easy to root for her and feel for her.

↣ Kang Tae Mu [played by Ahn Hyo Seop] - I’m less familiar with his works, but damn, I should change it because Hyo Seop did a great job as Tae Mu. I think the big thing I liked about his character was the fact that he didn’t have make his grief the thing that defined him. He learned how to grow with his grief rather than let it be the end all, be all situation that a lot of dramas tend to do. Watching him grow romantically was also a nice change; he became this romantic person that wanted to spend time Ha Ri and saw her efforts in the relationship. He realized his feelings quickly and made it intentional that he was interested in her and wanted to date her with marriage in mind. I loved watching his character development and his relationship grow.

↣ Jin Young Seo [played by Seol In Ha] - also another great character. I think the big thing I want to highlight for Young Seo is her sismance with Ha Ri; I loved their friendship and how it never wavered. Individually, she was great as well. She was also another strong female lead that went after what she wanted. She stood up for herself and her beliefs and I think that was one of her defining features. I think the only thing I thought was a bit off was the small business she wanted to start; it wasn’t very clear as to what she was going to sell and how she did it. I don’t like how Sung Hoon just openly gave her money to start up her business; I would have liked to see that development grow for her over time and it would have made more sense to know what she wanted to sell. Although, I think a note I loved about her character was that she stood against her father and cut ties with him rather than having them do a heart-to-heart and she deals with his abuse.

↣ Cha Sung Hoon [played by Kim Min Kyu] - we love a sassy secretary. He wasn’t a big character in the drama, but he was definitely impactful with his own iconic lines (”I’ll make sure you don’t forget.”). His chemistry with the other characters was defintely a highlight; his relationship with the other three were equally funny (even his minimal interactions with Ha Ri). There isn’t much I can say about his character, but he was entertaining and his romantic development with Young Seo was great to watch.

Romance: Rating - 10 out of 10

Despite the deceptions from the plot, the main leads actually had more communication (in comparisons to other kdramas). Their chemistry was also off the charts; they had a lot of romantic tension and it was interesting to watch. As their dynamic shifted from blind date/arranged marriage to fake dating to real dating, it was entertaining to watch as it unfolded. One of the things I noted before was about pacing and the romance pacing was defintely great. The facade wasn’t dragged for too long, neither was the fake identity of Geum Hui. It felt nicely paced (except for the last episode because we’re pretending that it doesn’t exist) and their romantic growth felt very satisfactory as a watcher. There was a lot of dynamics that came into play and watching the romance dynamics shift constantly was refreshing. One example is having them fake date due to Tae Mu’s grandpa, but then having them fake date for Ha Ri’s frenmies to see. In the short drama frame of 11 episodes, the writers gave a lot for the audience to see.

Secondary Characters/B-Plot: Rating - 9 out of 10

It’s our spicy couple!!! I loved the secondary love line; they were also equally as entertaining to watch as their relationship grew. Young Seo was really trying to “draw a line” due to her pettiness but I love how that pushed them together a bit more. I think my favorite thing about this couple is that they felt mutally attracted to one another at first sight. Although, I was surprised at how fast they were willing to get engaged, especially since they’re more of the level-headed characters in this drama. My only thing about this couple that I didn’t like was that when they slept together, Young Seo was drunk that she didn’t even remember it. Even though she was attracted to him, she would not have done that sober (and I know that’s the point), but she literally didn’t even remember how or what happened and they kind of just passed over it. Overall though, their dynamics were cute and I loved how she stood up for him against her father.

Additional Notes:

Last Episode: I hate hate hate that last episode. Seriously, it was just bad and lazy writing. As I have previously mentioned one of the refreshing aspects of the drama was how they used all those tropes to have them make sense. However, that last episode from the time jump to a rushed proposal (and we were robbed our second couple’s wedding!) and the whole disapproval/grandpa’s health issue thing... it was a hot mess and it did not work. As the last episode was progressing, it just felt confusing because: why does the grandpa suddenly have a health condition that can only be fixed overseas? why does Tae Mu have to go with him when there’s a company in Korea to run? why did it take a whole year? what is Young Seo’s job now? what about Sung Hoon and what has he been doing while Tae Mu is away and why didn’t he go with him? why did Tae Mu propose when they were away from one another for a whole year? None of it made sense and it opened more questions rather than tying loose ends.

Comedic Aspects: the comedic timing was also a great thing about this drama. There was a lot of romance, but the gimicks really topped the drama for me because it was so over the top ridiculous. Even in the situations that made no sense, I enjoyed watching it. A big part of this drama is that it is more on the comedy aspect (with the romance intact) and how the characters showed their different dynamics and interests. There were a lot of side characters that captured my attention too, especially when it came to their relationship with the main cast.

Recommendation List: I just wanted to note that this drama has made my recommendation list. It’s been a while since I’ve watched a drama and felt like it was special. Now, whenever a friend of mine asks for a drama recommendation, I would offer this drama as one (despite the awful ending). It’s definetly made my favorites list and I would highly recommend it to others.

Overall Rating: 9 out 10

Recommended?

↣ Yes: this is a feel-good drama that gives off positive vibes. I would say this is a good romantic comedy to watch. This also has a lot of twists and turns that makes for great entertainment. The comedic aspects are also very iconic to watch and you find yourself loving each of the characters. I would say this is a good drama where there aren’t clear antagonists; it’s more about the characters themselves. This is also very stereotypical kdrama with a rich male lead, but these tropes are written in a way that works.

↣ No: if you like more melodramatic dramas, this is not really a drama to watch. Maybe save it to make you feel better after a more dramatic kdrama. This drama is also very tropey and it does use a lot of aspects of other typical kdramas with this drama. There’s also the issue with the secondary couple and not having clear consent, which might bother you (including me). This is also a drama with a bad ending and if that’s what you anticipate in dramas, I would just stop watching at 11.

#a business proposal #kdrama review #kdrama recs #spoilers #mine

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propp · 3 years

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look i’ve been rewatching veep episodes over and over since like december and also reading a lot of what others have written about veep. and there’s a lot of people who like amy brookheimer a lot (i’m one of them) and there’s this general agreement that amy is hypercompetent but i see very little on what *specifically* about her as a person lends itself to this competence. i think the main and biggest thing is that amy has no interest in wider attention, is completely apathetic to the spotlight, is uninterested in being in the public eye. there’s no allure for her there. and in 21st century, where so much of celebrity is just this pathological obsession with holding the attention of the public, that sort of level-headed apathy toward all that is an insanely rare and valuable asset. even in veep, you have selina continually distracted from legacy/policy/etc because of her preoccupation with perception, you have dan constantly doing this crackshit gambits that bite him in the ass because he is desperate for notoreity, you can even make arguments that mike’s need to be liked by the press hinders him from actually doing his job. whereas with amy there’s just this near singular laser-focus on getting-candidate-elected-getting-candidate-policy-through-getting-candidate-agenda-established and so on and so forth. and yeah she’s not perfect at all that but she’s engaged with it more than with some nebulous idea of image, which is more than you can say about the other characters. like i just cannot articulate enough how much of an edge her immunity to the trappings of fame gives her

a much smaller other thing, that’s largely related to the spotlight point, is that amy does not give a shit about narrative. like i cannot imagine her reading or caring about a work of fiction for its own sake. like, she’ll use narrative to her advantage because she knows *other* people/voters are attracted to it, but on its own it has no appeal to her. and i think this, again, allows her to focus on more legacy-oriented things for her candidates *because* she has no personal stake in spin. like i think amy’s strengths all boil down to her being more uninterested in large romantic notions than other people are, and thus she isn’t sacrificing things for the sake of it. it’s an efficient, and arguably nigh sociopathic, way of functioning, but that’s where a lot of her competency comes from i feel. and its very very subtle but def still perceptible, since it’s in such stark contrast to the way that selina and dan carry themselves. should be noted that while these qualities in amy make her scary good at her job, they do lend themselves to a palpable social awkwardness in her (see: helsinki 2x05 her piss poor conversation skills at the dinner, clovis 3x04 her interactions with melissa / “go fuck yourself,” fishing 3x05 “i am incapable of being nice to people”) in a way that means she could never be the actual candidate, though she is very good at pulling the strings of one

#but yeah amy is apathetic to some things while being neurotic about others in such a good combination #essentially amy lacks charisma while still understanding people and thats a very good thing #also i think all of this is why dan and amy sort of work as a couple in s1-4. but that is a whole other post #mine

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essercipertuttienonperse · 3 years

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I don't really follow lorde but I felt like the first song she released for this era was really bland? what makes you think celeb culture got her? Would love to hear your thoughts <3

hi! yeah I think solar power was def a bit underwhelming especially because the last stuff she had made was melodrama which is a really really good album imo and coming after that with a beachy song about taking pictures at the beach is a bit😥 sjdj I'm not saying it's a bad song! like imo none of these 3 we've heard are bad songs they're just... okay.. bland as you said (I think stoned at the nail salon is my fave) but if you compare them to her previous stuff I think they fell a bit short? I think for me some of it is probably the production that feels a bit less original i guess? like idk I feel like I've already heard it while previously at least for me the songs felt a bit more unique like you could tell it was lorde ! also the lyrics have like some really nice moments and then moments that are kinda mehhh for me

the celebrity culture thing is that in my opinion a lot of lorde's appeal/brand/what made her stand out in her corner of music was the lyrics and how much people related to them and the fact that they put into words feelings that a lot of people were going through! especially with themes like growing up/ existing in the world etc and it was all very real because she was writing about what she experienced like one was about being a teenager in her hometown and she made it while she was a teenager in her hometown! and the other was about being in your 20s and all the changes/emotions/relationship stuff etc which she wrote as she was going through that and it all worked really well ! imo also because her fans were growing up at the same time so everything felt real and relatable. and I think obviously she knows that and tried to do the same with this album. but obviously this album had a big difference from the others from the very start which is that people rn aren't only feeling the universal emotions about life that she also feels, no rn people are still trying to cope with the entire world being turned upside down and everything that's been happening since last year BUT, and this is why I said the celebrity thing, those emotions and experiences are not universal this time!! this time as we all saw very often, celebrities had a very different experience of the pandemic than we did and imo this past year digged an even bigger gap between them and normal people and for someone who kinda built it all on being relatable that inevitably would turn out to be a problem. from what I've listened to so far she (like many others imo) is kinda circumnavigating the problem by not talking about it/ adopting the "its all over now! let's be happy again" thing which ... I mean I'm not saying it can't work or that people wouldn't like to feel that way because many want to! but at the same time I think it falls a bit flat because 1) is it really over? and 2) you haven't really been through it like normal people have so can the aftermath be the same for you as for them? like I think if you want to go down that route you kinda have to acknowledge the previous feelings first or its not really going to work imo, and especially not now when for so many people the world that she's talking about still seems so far away!! also in a lot of moments in these songs she mentions references to pop culture/celebrity culture like taking selfies on vacation, crystals and gossip magazines but idk to me it feels a bit... forced? like it's not really criticism but it's also not like from the normal person pov or at least it doesn't feel that way to me. [Taylor also avoided the problem but imo her way worked better because she created completely "new worlds" and stories and characters that people could escape to, rather than trying to propose a "brighter" alternative imo]

I'm going a bit all over the place but I hope this makes some sense sjdjjd in conclusion I think the main difference and probably what's causing fans to be a bit ??? is that loss of repeatability and closeness to ordinary life and emotions that characterized her music in the past and I think this is something that is happening/has happened to a lot of other celebrities since the pandemic because as I said it really deppened the disparities and imo also the tension between normal people and Them

#ask #anon #long post #sorry this got longggg

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magicrobins · 3 years

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Mass Effect Tag

Tagged by @commander-krios & @actualanxiousswampwitch! 💕

I am a fan since: ...Um... Oh god I can’t remember when I first heard about Mass Effect and decided I want to play it. It was a while after the trilogy had been out though. Like Andromeda was the first Mass Effect game I was there for the launch of. 2016 I think is when I first started ME1.

Favorite game of the series: If we’re only going with the trilogy, then ME3. If we’re going off of the Mass Effect franchise, then Andromeda is my favorite hands down.

MShep or FShep: My main Shepard is a male Shepard but he’s actually genderqueer, using he/him pronouns. So technically mShep but also technically neither as majority of my Sheps are nonbinary iirc.

Earthborn, Colonist, or Spacer: Colonist

Biotics or Tech: I’m a sucker for magic and biotics are the closest we get to magic in ME so while I have characters that don’t have any biotics, biotics and their classes are my faves.

Paragon or renegade: Paragade! : D Why pick one when you can have both? LOL.

Favorite Class: In the trilogy it’s adept, though I excitedly can’t wait for either of my vanguards. If we’re counting Andromeda, then my favorite is the explorer profile because of the biotic blink effect it gives you asdfghjkl;

Favorite Companion: I uh - I’m very basic in the fact that I love and adore them all and who I pick is more based off of the Shepard I’m playing and who they’re drawn to. With my main Shepard, Duncan, I had a variety of different squads I’d take with me ‘cause his main romance was Steve so I didn’t have a love interest to take around. I did take Samara a lot iirc in ME2 ‘cause I did her “fling” with Dunc.

Least Favorite Companion: I don’t have any LOL. I love them all. :’D It’s actually very rare for me to dislike a companion in a game (tho I can def think of two, they’re not from Mass Effect LOL).

My Squad Selection: Depends on the Shepard and who I feel like bringing along. Like stated above, the most consistent I took with me I think was Samara a lot in ME2. In ME3, I took Garrus, James, and Kaidan with Dunc a lot for reasons specific to Duncan. It’d def vary from my other Shepards, who are lucky enough to date squadmates and bring their LIs are mission dates. :’)

Favorite in-game romance: My favorite for ME in general would be in Andromeda. I’ve only completed Steve’s romance - and Samara’s “fling” - in the trilogy so far and while both are very nice imo and I adore them (the pacing in Steve’s could’ve been written better but I can admit that and still enjoy it) I wouldn’t say either are my favorites. /:

Other pairings I like: I like any pairings so long as they’re not like Steve/femShep or Traynor/mShep. All the romances in the trilogy are nice and I think quite a few are underappreciated. Jacob/Shep (regardless of gender) could use more love imo. I know how his romance ends in ME3, but his romance in ME2 seems quite nice still to me and Dunc would’ve romanced him so fast if he’d been bi, gdi the chemistry. -clears throat- Don’t mind me, I’m just crying in a corner LOL.

Favorite NPC: Oh no I love so many. ;-;

Favorite Antagonist: As a character I actually quite like Kai Leng and the Illusive Man. As people, I don’t like them LOL but as characters they’re very fascinating and interesting to me.

Favorite Mission: I really liked the Leviathan mission, the one at the end in that ocean. Maybe it’s ‘cause Steve was actually in it quite a bit and Dunc had some new/feelsy scenes with his boyfriend LOL. I’m desperate for Shortez content, okay? ;-;

Favorite DLC: Citadel. I am bASIC LOL. I like how almost everyone shows up again (I say “almost everyone” ‘cause obvs Chakwas isn’t there and Kelly doesn’t make an appearance again) and it’s funny and goofy and parts of it were some of the few times I actually felt like I related to my Shepard more or he felt more real to me during that DLC? Idk how to explain it tbh.

Favorite Loyalty Mission: It’s been a while since I played ME2... I think Tali’s maybe???

Control, Synthesis, or Destroy: Destroy! The other options don’t really appeal to me however I find it fascinating that there are players they appeal to and I find that really cool. :3

Favorite Weapon: Sniper rifle. Unless I can count biotics LOL. I got Dunc’s weapon weight down so low in ME3 that his biotic powers’ cooldown was 100% lolol.

Favorite Place: ...A bad thing about Andromeda being the most recent game I’ve played, I only remember the locations in that one LOL. ^^”” The quarian (sp?) homeworld was nice iirc!

A quote I like:

“They rebuilt Mindoir... It wasn’t the same.” - Colonist!Shepard

“Someone needs my boot up their ass.” - Shepard

“Never do that again! ...Sir.” - Steve Cortez

“50,000 years and I still don’t get picked.” - Javik

And honestly any dialogue line from the Citadel DLC or the final mission in ME3 LOL.

Tagging: @bxtgrl and anyone else who wants to ‘cause I’m realizing idk how many of my mutuals play ME. o-o;;

#mass effect tag #mass effect #*tag game #i'd have better answers if this wasn't trilogy only ok xD #andromeda owns my heart uwu

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onelastbreath-writes · 3 years

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On Bruce And Texting:

Author’s Note: Hello and welcome, this is my first properly written fic, originally posted to my AO3, and now that I have finally created a writing blog, it’s here as well. Please enjoy!! AO3. Masterlist

Warnings: Hopefully none, its all cute and fluff <3

Summary: Bruce Wayne texts like he's sending correspondences to the Queen, so of course the little monsters he calls children just have to make fun of him! Brats, the lot of them, but he wouldn't have them any other way.

Features: Bruce Wayne/Selina Kyle, all the bats and birds, mentions JL, no crime fighting, only family fluff, jokes and nods to Millennial and GenZ shenanigans.

Word Count: 2.7k

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Billionaire, genius, tech expert, father of many children, and all around up-to-date-with-just-about-everything type of person he may be, it is also a well-known Fact that Bruce Wayne, the Batman(TM) himself, can’t text to save his life.

Whether it’s due to his Very Proper English Upbringing, his inability to be informal via written correspondences of any type, his indifference, or the fact that it bothers his children so much, Bruce Wayne has not and never will text with anything less than perfect grammar, spelling, and formality. If he has not sent you a proper letter (featuring a dedication, indentation for every paragraph, signature, and post-script when applicable), he did, in fact, not send you that text. Informality is not his Batman Way(TM) according to his children... he’s not too sure what that even means, but it makes his young ones laugh so it’s probably fine?

His oldest children (Richard and Jason) were raised in the time of Change, where computers, internet access, social media, and all things similar were only just being introduced into households en-masse. They were young enough to remember a time without such devices and connectivity (both for very different reasons, of course, but they grew up without the newest technology none-the-less). They could understand his relationship to the digital environment more so than his younger children, but they still tended to poke fun at his ‘texting blunders’ regularly. All his kids somehow ended up as brats. He doesn’t know how this happened. It’s certainly not his fault. He blames the League members, and especially Clark Kent, for their defiant personalities.

His younger children, whom he loves dearly, like to confuse him as much as they possibly can with their slang, egregious spelling errors, and all-around ‘internet humour’. He doesn’t know what ‘wig’ or ‘worm’ or ‘oof’ or anything means. He has no idea what those dances are, or how they relate to the music that seems to always accompany them, and for the love of all that is good, don’t ask him what he thinks of this or that ‘meme’. What even is a ‘meme’, and should he be more concerned about his kids being obsessed with them? He tries, oh my god, does he try to follow the children’s conversations, but they somehow all learned a language he has no idea how to decrypt. His best response to them once they start speaking in tongues is as follows: smile but not too much, listen to child even though he is deeply confused, and pat child on head or shoulder when they are finished and are looking for assurance.

He refuses to be a parent who ignores or tunes out his children, so he always makes sure to put down his work, his crossword, his tools, or whatever else is in his hands when a child searches him out for a conversation. But somehow, despite all the time he spends around them and their strange words, when he gets text from them comprised of abbreviations, acronyms, and completely random words, he goes a little cross eyed. He would never tell anyone, but he keeps a running list on his phone about the things they say that he has had to translate in the past. Spilling tea? Speaking the truth, usually to do with gossip. Wow? Multiple possible meanings: either a video game, or someone saying it (different pronunciation depending on context and who sent the text). Stickbug? A nice little prank with no ulterior motives, just for fun. Something along the lines of “this basic bitch Karen at the grocery store who is a dirty rat-licker and is def an anti-vaxxer just took 45 (forty-five) minutes to decide she didn’t actually want that almond milk. I Stan the cashier who had to put up with her. Rad af dude.” roughly translates to “A rude, middle-aged white woman who wasn’t wearing a mask and doesn’t believe in disease control or vaccinating her children wasted a great deal of an essential worker’s time in the checkout line. The cashier was very professional in their dealings with said customer and should be commended on their actions.”

Given enough time, the internet for searching up new slang words, and occasionally some help from a friend (Alfred, Selina, Lucius, another of his children, etc), Bruce could decode and respond appropriately to most texts. He was quite proud of these achievements, and although he didn’t always like how often his children were on their phones or computers or gaming systems, he was quite proud of how integrated and easily they adapted to the ever-evolving world of electronics. All his kids were gifted in many ways, but their ability to learn, their hunger for knowledge, and their perseverance when exploring new and challenging ideas were always the things that he was most impressed by.

He could do without their comments though. Yes, surprisingly, he did manage to get girlfriends with his type of texting. No, he doesn’t miss the ‘good old days’ when telegraphs were the main form of long-distance correspondence (how old do these brats think he is?!). And yes, he does know what a “tweet” is, and how to “post” on his social media accounts, and what “sliding into your DMs” is (thanks to a frantic search after a WE employee mentioned it near him). The Wayne children, truly whom and what Bruce considers his pride and joy, are cruel little jerks to him sometimes. His hoard of parenting books fails to mention what one should do when their children gang up on them. Bullying is covered of course, but he can’t really talk to a teacher or his guardian about how his second son calls him an idiot sandwich, or that his third son regularly tries to get him to do something “For The Vine”. His oldest and youngest boys are only slightly better in the bullying him department; Richard and his puppy dog eyes when he wants to do something dangerous or not-Alfred-approved, and Damian and his growing collection of pets because “Mother never let me have them, and I am deprived, and don’t you love me Father?”.

His only good child is his beautiful daughter Cassandra, the flower of the Wayne clan. She gives him hugs, and pats his hands, and can sit with him and just enjoy the quiet and stillness when his other children are not around. Her language skills are improving by leaps and bounds every day, and her heart and spirit are unparalleled, but her main method of communication is in her movements. Her hands, her posture, her dancing; Bruce couldn’t think of a more graceful, fluid, powerful person if the world depended on it. His amazing little girl doesn't bully him (and if she ever does, he probably deserves it, he trusts her), so he turns to her most of all when it comes to communicating with someone else. She doesn’t let him send anything that is “sketchy” or “wrong words, bad meaning, Dad”. He would give the world to his children, but for Cassandra, he would destroy it and build her an entirely new one.

Social media, especially with his terrible children all having accounts dedicated to making him look like a simpleton, was another rocky terrain he had to navigate on the regular. He had professionals in place at WE to run the company’s many accounts, paid top dollar to help appeal and relate to the masses, but he mostly had to manage his personal accounts himself. And so, @TheRealBruceWayne was one of the greatest struggles in his adult life. Why can’t he just retweet every post from @WE_Offical and leave it at that? People should only want to know about what’s new with the company. What do you mean they want to know more about our family and private lives? That’s unnecessary, and not important to the running of the company, right? Right? Why are you laughing?!

Luckily, most people in his life aren’t so intimately aware of his struggles. He can act and lie all he wants about being “hip” and “woke” and whatever else the kids are saying these days when he’s with the JL or in board meeting intermissions, networking with his associates. The Batman knows all and sees all, Green Lantern, of course he understands how “Tiktok” works. The Batman is a robot without a funny bone in his body, Green Arrow, but I did witness him sigh and say “same” when he knocked his cup of coffee over while on monitor duty once. No matter how badly his darling children call him out, the Justice League would be so much worse. So, it’s one of his most importantly guarded secrets... even more so than his secret identity at this point. Being unmasked in front of every Gotham rogue would be less detrimental to him than his “friends” learning of his utter ineptitude in staying on top of the younger generations’ lingo.

When questioned why the League doesn’t have a group chat or a forum or anything that they can use to contact each other outside of world ending matters and communicator (”because we’re friends, Batman! Ma and Pa Kent would love to have everyone over for a barbecue!”), the person who dared even mention texting isn’t even given a verbal response. They are just glared at, silently, often for several uninterrupted minutes, frozen in place only able to breathe shallowly in fear of setting off the Bat. “You know why” his glare says, “I’ll eat you, your family, and everything you have ever held dear” the younger members hear. No one makes the mistake of asking about it twice.

Outside of his children and Alfred, and his small circle of true friends involved in all aspects of his life, there is only one more person Bruce allows to know of his Darkest Secret. Selina. Someone most people would recommend he not be involved with. Catwoman: accomplished thief, distraction, chaos-incarnate most nights, and his significant other. Sharp as a whip (ha) and crafty like no one’s business; he is head-over-heels. On again/Off again and all over the place their long romance has been, but no one has ever challenged him, intrigued him, like this clever, beautiful, amazing woman has. He’s brought his partners around his children before, both for their judgement, and for their worst behaviours to vet out any “unworthy” suitors. He trusts them explicitly to tell him the truth about those he allows into the manor; were they rude about Bruce wanting to have group outings, did they say something about Bruce’s money, did they get angry or shout or make anyone uncomfortable while they were here? If his children even looked slightly unhappy with someone he brought them to meet, that person would not be invited back. Children, he finds, have the best sight when meeting people; no motives other than finding safety and love, no fear of consequences from speaking honestly...

Selina, or Catwoman, as they had known her first, was someone all of his kids liked without issue right off the bat. She would make puns and play word games with Richard, his first Robin, tiny, still working on his English, able to connect with him over their acrobatic abilities. His second Robin, Jason, skittish and feisty as an alley cat, knew of Catwoman and her daring escapades long before Bruce found him. The young boy had a few heroes, and no one (not even Wonder Woman) could compare to the incredible burglar who bought food and jackets and medicine for the street kids in Crime Alley. She was saintly in his eyes, and to this day, Bruce was still working on convincing Jason he was good enough for Selina. Tim and Cass and Stephanie (basically another daughter to Bruce, she spends so much time with the family) all joined the Wayne clan around the same time and officially met Selina as a friend and partner of his, and in the good graces of his first two sons. Selina, in all her nightly business, and many travels and acquaintances, had met the three independently, helping Tim get home safely back to Drake Manor when he escaped to photograph Batman and Robin in the dank darkness of Gotham when he was just a young boy, spending some time with Cassandra when her despicable father left her alone long enough to recover from his rough treatment, showing her the first scraps of kindness in her short life, and watching over and protecting Stephanie as she followed and sabotaged her father Cluemaster and his criminal activities. There was no need to win them over once they met her civilian identity, she had already gained their favour and acceptance, and they were happy to have her near their new family. Damian, his youngest, his biological son, took the longest to warm up to Selina. He would never fault his little boy for fighting so hard against a woman that was not his birth mother, especially after all the manipulation and cruelty dealt to him by Talia for the first decade of his life. But as he began to learn about his father, these people in his father’s life, and this woman that was Not His Mother but “still okay, I guess”, he grew to see her as acceptable. Her cats definitely helped, he’d say, no one with cats that loyal and happy can be a bad person.

Selina, the love of his life, he’d admit quietly to himself, was also a dirty traitor and in cahoots with his terrible children. She would say his texting skills were “sweet” and “very gentlemanly” when she was asked by anyone outside the family, and privately to him she would say she thought they were “adorable” and “please don’t ever change, Bruce, I like it.” However, nothing seemed to bring her more joy than his children sending her texts and “Snaps” and “memes” about him to her. Sometimes it was screenshots of the family group chat that they forced him to join, where he would post “To whom it may concern...” and “In regards to...” when he needed to reach all his delinquents in a timely manner. Sometimes it was video clips of him staring at his phone intently, then typing something on his laptop, then him reading and nodding along, and then finally going back and responding to the text he received with a small, pleased smile. And sometimes, when he got too injured or was too incapacitated to text coherently, he’d have his nearest able child transcribe his text to her. Depending on who was texting her for Bruce, she could expect many different things. From Dick, she’d get lots of shorthand and silly emojis, and many, many, winky and crying/laughing faces in brackets depending on what Bruce had made him type. Jason, bless him, used proper English most of the time, but would never write a single word of Bruce’s soliloquy to her, instead she enjoyed the TL;DR version: “hurt again, missing you, come home soon, blah blah blah, sappy gross words here, love you”. Tim would allow speech recognition to run on Bruce’s phone, and just let it go until the man passed out. Stephanie, the little chaos child, would film it and send it to her, including all her muffled laughter and shaky camera shots of Bruce emoting with his available undamaged limbs. Cass, still more versed in physicality and emotive movement, would interpret Bruce’s text into mostly emojis, hearts and happy faces and animals, but would include photos, and phrases that she found important enough to type out for Selina. Damian, forever his Father’s son in any way possible, texts very formally, referring to her or his siblings Bruce mentions by last name only, and lots of “Father requests me to tell you...” and “Kyle, know that Father...”. She adores these kids, and once Bruce recovers enough to text her himself, or she gets back to the Manor, they get to laugh about whatever she was sent this time.

So, while it’s true that Bruce couldn’t text his way out of a wet paper bag, and his kids are sometimes brats about it, there’s probably a lot of different reasons he doesn’t spend too much time trying to improve his skills. Whether it’s the smiles of his children, the giggles of his significant other, or the warm feeling in his chest when he sees all his important people bonding over him, well, in the end, who’s to say?

#batman #batfam #bruce/selina #batcat #bruce wayne #selina kyle #bruce x selina

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