#My Devotion and Mah Protection

[chloe-clegane]

I hope im not bothering you but im curious if you’re going to continue writing on Ao3 or if you’ll come back to finish My devotion Mah protection?

It’s not a bother at all! It actually means a lot to have someone reach out about it.

The short answer is yes, the long answer is this has been a super weird two years that have tested my mental health and my normal life is completely different than what it used to be and perfectionism and anxiety have given me some crippling anxiety and writers block. I basically got a really bad case of imposter syndrome.

But, all that aside, I really want to finish it. I met my boyfriend because I wrote this fic and now there’s immigration being discussed and I’ve realized that me writing this fic and him commenting might be the best things we’ve ever done. So now more than ever, this story means so much to me personally and I’m working on tackling some more anxiety and brushing off my writing skills. I might post some Cal/Merrin Jedi Fallen Order wips I have and start getting my groove back… I hope. I’m sorta afraid to make promises but I also really want to do it if I can get my brain to comply

#my devotion and mah protection #personal shit #my fics

[ok12857]

fanfics that broke me

this is short but sweet I have two fan fictions here that live rent free in my head causing me pain:

-Mah devotion and protection by @chloe-clegane she never finished it so it was left on a very intense cliff hanger

-I don’t remember it’s name but it was a canon divergence where rayla dies and callum dies shortly after and the ending is that she greets him with “hey sad prince” in heaven or something. Idk why it hurts so much

another side note to the people who ship callum and rayla with made up characters during the time skip, no. Just be blabbering about my pain leave me be

#tdp #rayllum #mystery of aaravos #the dragon prince #callum x rayla #rayla #rayla x callum #tdp s5 #callum #aaravos

[holidays-events]

In honor of Native American Heritage Month in the U.S., November 1

today’s interactive Doodle—illustrated by Zuni Pueblo guest artist Mallery Quetawki—celebrates Zuni (A:shiwi) Native American fiber artist, weaver, and potter the late We:wa (wee-wah). As a Łamana (thah-mah-nah), the late We:wa was a revered cultural leader and mediator within the Zuni tribe, devoting their life to the preservation of Zuni traditions and history.

As advised by the Zuni tribe, it is discouraged to speak of community members who have passed on within the present tense. Therefore, we refer to We:wa as “the late We:wa” out of respect for their memory and spirit.

The term “Two Spirit” became widely adopted in the 1990s to encompass the various non-binary gender identities and expressions amongst Indigenous peoples. In the Zuni tribe, Łamana is the recognized third gender outside of the male-female binary system. Historical records have used both “he” and “she” pronouns in reference to Łamana and the late We:wa. Because Łamana and many modern Indigenous Two-Spirit people are considered distinct from male and female genders, we have aligned with our Zuni community collaborators and elected to use the ungendered singular pronoun “they.”

The late We:wa was born of the Donashi:kwi (Badger clan) and a child of the Bit'chi:kwe (Dogwood clan)  around 1849 in Zuni Pueblo, a community indigenous to the land that is now known as New Mexico. In the Zuni tribe, Łamana is a recognized third gender outside of the male-female binary system and revered as a traditional cultural concept reflecting harmony and balance. Like most Łamana, at a young age the late We:wa began learning a variety of skills done by both men and women in the tribe. They became an expert weaver, a role traditionally taken on by men in the community, and created textiles using different looms. After years of training, the late We:wa became one of the first Zuni craftspeople to sell ceramics and woven goods to non-Indigenous people, which catalyzed the process of Indigenous crafts being appreciated as a fine art in the U.S.

The late We:wa also mastered essential Zuni myths, songs, and ceremonies to become a highly respected spiritual leader in the community. Their cultural expertise led to the late We:wa traveling with American anthropologists James and Matilda Stevenson to Washington, D.C. in 1885 in hopes of fostering cultural exchange. During the late We:wa’s landmark visit to the U.S. capital, they called upon high-ranking U.S. officials to protect Zuni lands and culture from encroaching settlers.

Even in the face of colonial policy, which threatens Indigenous peoples nationwide, the late We:wa’s dedication to their community never faltered. They returned to Zuni Pueblo, where they spent the remainder of their life as an artist and community leader. Today, the late We:Wa’s legacy lives on in the approximately 10,000 Zuni people who safeguard the rich tapestry of Zuni heritage and retain one the most uninterrupted cultural lineages of modern Indigenous tribal communities in the U.S.

Give the art of weaving a try in today’s interactive Doodle in honor of the late We:wa and their craft!

Guest Artist Q&A with Mallery Quetawki

Today’s Doodle was illustrated by Zuni Pueblo guest artist Mallery Quetawki. Below, she shares her thoughts behind the making of this Doodle:

Q. What does creating a Doodle for the late We:wa mean to you personally?

A. Personally, creating the We:wa Doodle was an honor as We:wa was such a warm and generous individual who exemplified our core values as A:shiwi. To be representing my people on this Doodle is another honor that I will always be thankful for. We are a village filled with talented artists and I am absolutely grateful for this honor to represent our history and to tell it using our art.

Q. How did you approach illustrating the late We:wa’s story? Did you seek guidance from anyone else in the tribe?

A. I was very fortunate to accompany our keepers of traditional knowledge to Washington D.C. a couple years ago to visit the Smithsonian Museum of the American Indian.  On this trip I was able to view the collection created or collected during We:wa’s stay in DC in the late 1800’s.  That up-close connection to our people’s past and We:wa’s role in our government relations with the U.S. gave me another sense of pride in where I come from.  I was able to learn directly from our religious leaders and cultural keepers of knowledge of the items in that museum collection.  I have kept that knowledge with me, as well as the research I had done on We:wa in a college course describing the dual gender roles that can be seen in our tribe.  The very few photos of We:wa were not the only images I used to create the portrait.  I made sure I included the character that We:wa was both in social and cultural contexts.

Q. What stands out most for you from the late We:wa’s story and legacy?

A. The idea that We:wa was our first ambassador between the U.S. Government and the tribe is very impressive. We:wa learned English to aid our tribal leaders in DC. However, the biggest story to me that has pulled at my heartstrings is how he and his husband adopted so many children who had no one else.  They had a wealthy household—not based on money and material, but on the warmth of his character in helping those in need and being in that dual role of spiritual and social guidance.  He was a very devout person in our culture and religion and was thus blessed in life with his ability to speak to others and his craft at weaving and pottery.  We:wa was a caregiver in both our physical and spiritual realms.

Q. What do you hope people will take away from this Doodle?

A. I hope that people become aware of our traditional customs and the fact that they are very much in practice currently.  Our ancient ways of life are still here and we can all learn from one another.  We:wa was a male individual who lived as a woman.  He is an ancestor of ours whom we think so dearly. If we could all be caring and empathetic to one another we can all live We:wa’s legacy.

#Youtube

[eerna]

A commission for @chloe-clegane of a couple of scenes from the fic (link in replies) My Devotion and Mah Protection~ (do be warned of adult content though, kiddos)

#the dragon prince #rayllum #eernart

[the-blind-geisha]

🔥Tonight, Demiurge joins the hunt.🔥 As a fellow Souls fan like oh mah gawd!! I need Dems as a hunter praising the old gods now or something. Blood for the blood gods! ⚔️ Headcanons or musings or art!! Whatever you want!!

I wish I had energy to draw hunter Demiurge, my dear, but sadly I cannot find the moment to do so. X”3 Maybe in the future I'll find a second to create such an image. Heck, I'd love to plug back in my Bloodborne game and snap a few shots around places I loved to get ideas for a reference for a background~.

But for now, headcanons it is!... At least, till maybe, I write the darn thing.

Demiurge is a hunter for his own pleasure. Merely enjoying in watching those die at his hands. He keeps his 'insanity' hidden as well as his monstrous appearance that slowly begins to show overtime. He is one of the few hunters that has transformed but able to hide this behind dignity and refinement.

He is actually blind and has no eyes in this world. He wraps his blind sight behind a thick cloth he's had for years, showing the old bloodstains on it even to this day as his eyes were harshly removed. 

His main weapon is the threaded cane but will use the Kirkhammer as well.

Because of his blindness, his other senses are very acute. Some people have a hard time believing he is blind.

He as well has the epitaph of living a tragically long life when he bound himself to a lady he found quelled the raging beast within him. None are certain as to what has caused this as they are unaware of the truth. They merely assume Demiurge is too stubborn to die without his lady.

With his lady being a priestess of blood, she looks to the fair hunter, Demiurge, and offers her blood to him for healing.

Demiurge partakes in her offers gladly... at least until she falls ill with an unknown sickness.

This turns things around to where Demiurge tries to get her the blood transfusions needed to cure her of whatever has sickened her.

Sadly, after many attempts, nothing seems to work. Demiurge even offers her to drink from his blood, but she finds it too grotesque to take (because he is a monster). Regardless of this, I am sure he tries and tries, as he won't accept defeat, and he wants her to love his blood.

When she refuses after a time in tears, he knows what he has to do.

Knowing she needs the blood of pure-humans, Demiurge changes the idea of hunting to that of fellow hunters and humans that do not ward away beasts with incense. Slaying without mercy, he brings her the blood she needs to at least have some form of healing and strength.

It isn't until later, he realizes that he cannot continue this forever. Eventually the dream will not have hunters or humans any longer. He either must wake her and himself, or do something far more drastic.

He would either start the idea of his farm but breed humans to slay and bleed out, or he would try to transform her into a beast of the night that he would protect and devote his eternal life to.

#and while i love souls lore bloodborne was the only one i could actually finish as i am an aggressive fighter #dark souls is too much 'waiting around' and it drives me nuts xD #but i do love the lores #demiurge #demiurge headcanon #demiurge/mc #demiurge/reader #overlord demiurge #overlord #overlord anime #anime overlord #headcanons #mod answers #anon

[today-only-happens-once]

If there's a video game or book series or TV show or movie you have thoughts about that you'd like to gush, please do for this ask!! What drew/draws you to it? What's it's best qualities, or worst? Anything you would change if you were given the chance? Good luck with your life-managing and brain-wrangling stuff!

klsjfkdlsjfkldsjf anon you have my whole heart rn

So can I gush about just one character from a show? Because I’mma gush about mah boi Jaskier from the Witcher because I will never shut up about him if given the opportunity:

Gonna stick it under a cut tho because I could ramble about him for hours and he’s not a ts character. ^u^ Thank you for this opportunity anon, but you do not know the floodgates that you have opened. (Mobile users if its doesn’t cut off for you I’m SO SORRY)

Alright so! Jaskier! My heart is so full of love for him like heck. I can’t even explain what, exactly, it is about him that makes me love him so, so much! 

He is relentlessly, unflinchingly loyal to Geralt. I know Joey Batey (the actor that plays him) said that the word he kept coming back to when it comes to playing Jaskier and understanding his character is that term: loyalty. He follows this man around for 22 years (and I get that they’re not literally together all the time for those 22 years but still). He devotes his career, in no small part, to making sure that the world loves Geralt after he is gone. That is going to be Jaskier’s legacy. I think he knows that. I think he likes that; this idea that when Jaskier is old and gone, a part of the world might be a little bit kinder to Geralt and the Witchers like him. 

And he’s such a spot of sunshine in an otherwise very, very dark show. Jaskier brings a balance to the show’s dynamic that is needed, in my opinion. And I also think that’s part of Geralt’s begrudging draw and appreciation of him as well (though I’ll try not to ramble too much about that, as it’s addressed in one of me WIP for the Witcher fandom). But I just... he brings balance. To the show, and especially to Geralt.

But Jaskier, really, is Geralt’s foil at every step. Jaskier is bright and vibrant and literally does not shut up, and Geralt is... not. He lives in a very dark and unforgiving world. A world that has been cruel and harsh to him for as long as he’s been alive. But then here comes Jaskier, who... isn’t. Jaskier is kind, and he fills Geralt’s world with light and love. 

And Jaskier sees that light and goodness in everyone around him, including Geralt. Another thing Joey Batey has been vocal about in terms of his approach to Jaskier’s character (and something he brought up with the writers) is this whole idea of doing away with Jaskier as a womanizer and instead this ardent, all-consuming, but genuine love that Jaskier has for the world around him. Jaskier doesn’t womanize; a part of him falls in love with everyone he meets. And I think that extends to Geralt.

I ship him with Geralt. I do. Wholeheartedly, though I don’t have any illusions that canon will follow that. And part of that is loving this idea that Geralt sees Jaskier as this light and love and brightness in his life that he is both afraid of and desires to protect, and this idea that Jaskier sees Geralt has he’s always wanted to be seen. Jaskier sees the selflessness and the sacrifice and the care that Geralt carries around with him and the bard does everything he can to make him seen as the hero he is--as the hero Geralt wants to be, but doesn’t always feel he is. 

They see the best in each other, is really what I’m getting at here.

AND THEN there’s the role Jaskier plays in the show’s pervasive underlying thematic exploration of the idea of choice and fate. There are three main characters that are tied directly to Geralt: Yennefer, Ciri, and Jaskier. And Jaskier is the only one of those three that is tied to Geralt because of active, continued, persistent choice to be. Yennefer and Ciri are both tied to him by magic and fate, and that doesn’t mean those relationships are meaningless. But I think Jaskier’s relationship to Geralt has the potential to play a role in how the show explores this theme going forward. My only hope, given the six year gap that follows the mountaintop Break Up scene is that such a long absence of Jaskier drives that point home for Geralt. That Jaskier doesn’t ever have to come back. That every time he returned to Geralt’s side, it was done by concious choice born out of loyalty and love (though what brand of love is up to your interpretation; I’m a full-time Geraskier shipper for all the reasons above and more, so you know where I fall on that side of things).

I like the Witcher as a show in general terms too. But it’s a far cry from faultless. There are moments where I (and some other parts of the fandom) are basically Fury in Avengers with the whole “I’m aware the council has made a decision” scene. But I think it does a lot of good things too. Like Jaskier. And I hope the show keeps doing good things. Like Jaskier. (pls pls pls more Jaskier episodes in season 2 PLS im BEGGING). 

#not ts #jaskier #witcher #long post

[thekatthatbarks]

A Certain Kind of Devotion

kakayama, Rated M, 9.4k

ao3 

              Kakashi sighed and Yamato watched as he dropped his pen to his desk and started to rub the spot between his eyebrows. Yamato looked on in sympathy, having watched Kakashi drag his feet the whole day. Despite applying for it himself, he had mixed feelings about being assigned to Kakashi’s ANBU guard. He was honored to serve and protect him, even if it meant it was silently from the shadows. But he hadn’t expected the anxiety that coiled in his stomach on days like this. When he wanted nothing more than to reach out to Kakashi or even offer some words of comfort, but his duty was to remain hidden in the corners of his office – out of sight, out of mind.

                He wasn’t foolish enough to think Kakashi didn’t know he was there, that he didn’t know where his ANBU guard was at all times. Some of the younger members liked to pride themselves on fooling their Hokages with how well they could conceal themselves, but Yamato wasn’t so naïve. He was sure Kakashi could even pinpoint who was who in the dark. The man wasn’t chosen as Hokage simply because of how nice he looked carved into the mountain.

                Yamato wondered if him being there was any kind of comfort to Kakashi, even if they didn’t interact.

                An ANBU appeared beside him and Yamato tore his eyes away from Kakashi to look at them. Rabbit nodded her head and signed, “Shift change.”

                Yamato smiled in relief behind his mask even if she couldn’t see it and nodded back. He was tempted to go to Kakashi then but fought it down and went back to the ANBU Headquarters. He didn’t want to be overbearing and he had to draw the professional line somewhere. After he changed into a jounin uniform, though, his feet led him back to the Hokage Tower.

 Kakashi called out for him to come in after he knocked, and Yamato tried to not be too pleased when Kakashi smiled seeing it was him. He told him quietly as Yamato walked towards the desk, “Ah, Tenzou, I thought you were one of those pesky council members coming to badger me again.”

 Yamato smiled, stopping in front of the desk. “You know you might be here a while, might want to try and lessen that animosity.”

 Kakashi let out a dry chuckle, glancing up at him. “Don’t remind me.” He leaned back in his chair and his eyes were so tired when they met Yamato’s. “Did you need something or were you just dying to see me?”

 Yamato rolled his eyes at him and teased back as he rounded the desk to stand beside his chair. “Oh, I think I see you often enough, Kakashi-sama.”

 “I’ve told you to drop the sama, Tenzou.” Kakashi side eyed him as Yamato crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the desk.

 “And I’ve told you to call me Yamato now.” Yamato gave him a long-suffering sigh, but it was just for show. He didn’t mind Kakashi calling him Tenzou. Even if he did, it would never compare to how much Kakashi hated almost anyone calling him sama.

 Kakashi leaned his head into the palm of his hand, his fingers massaging his left temple. He mumbled, “It’s just us.”

 Yamato felt himself smile and told him quietly back, “Okay, Kakashi-senpai.”

 It earned him a short-lived smile before Kakashi winced again and said, “You’d think if I didn’t have the damn thing anymore, these headaches would’ve stopped.”

 Yamato frowned and reached out to him like he’d wanted to all day. He rested his hand on Kakashi’s arm, telling him softly, “Why don’t you leave a little early today and go home to rest?”

 Kakashi sighed and looked down at the papers on his desk, probably gauging how much extra work he’ll have tomorrow if he leaves now. Yamato added in his hesitation, “It’s been a slow day anyway.”

 Kakashi smiled and looked up at him in thought, still leaning his head in his hand. Yamato felt his chest squeeze as he smiled back. He wondered if Kakashi would always have that effect on him. He supposed so since it had already been twenty years and the feelings had only planted themselves deeper inside him over time.

 “I guess it couldn’t hurt.”

 Yamato had forgotten about his hand on Kakashi’s arm until he was reminded when the man placed his hand over his. “Join me for dinner?”

 “Sure,” Yamato agreed easily, straightening as Kakashi stood up and took his hand back. Kakashi closed the open folder on his desk and headed towards the door.

 Yamato followed him as they walked past the coat rack with the Hokage robes and hat. Kakashi only wore them when they had visitors from other lands or the Lord of Fire himself. Yamato couldn’t say he was surprised. Though, a small part of him was happy that Sakura had at least convinced him to wear the flak jacket she had made for him. A dark vest, simply cut with Rokudaime embroidered on the back in a deep red. It suited him more than the robes, anyway.

 Kakashi was quiet as they walked and Yamato fell easily into step beside him, noticing they were taking the oddest route to his apartment. But then he realized Kakashi chose the least crowded streets to walk down and Yamato could see why after the second person came up to talk to him in the span of five minutes. People had always eyed Kakashi as he passed by, but it had become so much more pronounced since he became Hokage. Kakashi had only been Hokage for almost a month now and Yamato rarely worked the evening shift, so he hadn’t noticed it.

 Even when he stepped out of the office, Kakashi couldn’t catch a break.

 They reached his apartment quickly enough and the sigh that fell from Kakashi’s masked lips once the door closed was clearly relief. His muscles sagged and Yamato’s heart went out to him as he took off his shoes. Yamato stepped towards the kitchen as Kakashi shed his jacket and headband, tossing them to a chair in his small living room.

 Yamato was peeking into his fridge as Kakashi’s feet padded into the kitchen. He chuckled and leaned against the counter beside him. “I didn’t invite you over to cook me dinner, Tenzou.”

 Yamato shrugged, glancing at him with a smile as he pulled ingredients out. “I don’t mind.”

 Kakashi gave him a long sigh but there was a faint smile beneath his mask. “I’ll help you then.”

 They fixed the meal quickly, quiet laughter filling the kitchen as they made light hearted jabs at each other. Even after all these years, Kakashi still liked to lean into his space and tease him over whatever he could think of. Yamato bit back at him with a roll of his eyes, but he couldn’t say he minded it. Not with that light in Kakashi’s eyes and not with the smile that constantly threatened his lips.

  Yamato leaned back in his chair after they finished eating and Kakashi got up from the table, grabbing their plates and taking them to the sink. He was back a second later, standing behind him and tugging on his forehead protector. Yamato made an annoyed noise and reached up to bat his hand away. Kakashi laughed and his voice felt soft as he told him, “Stay a while.”

 Yamato felt his heart squeeze in his chest, and he pulled off his forehead protector to lay it on the table. “Alright.”

 Kakashi went to the living room and Yamato trailed after him, tossing his own flak jacket to the chair Kakashi had thrown his. They sat down on the couch and Yamato looked down in surprise when Kakashi laid down with his head in his lap. They had always been close, their personal bubbles often overlapping each other’s. But this was different.

 Yamato was thankful Kakashi closed his eyes, sure he was probably blushing. He rested his arm on the back of the couch and leaned his head against his fist, looking down at him with an amused smile. “What’re you doing?”

 Kakashi peeked an eye at him and Yamato could make out the teasing smile underneath his mask. “Do you mind?”

 “No.” Yamato’s other hand fell to Kakashi’s hair and he watched with an unsteady heart as Kakashi closed his eye again.

 “Mah, maybe I’ve just gotten physically affectionate in my old age.”

 Yamato chuckled and carded his fingers absentmindedly through Kakashi’s hair, watching as the man sighed contently. Yamato smiled and glanced around the apartment, noticing more furniture than the last time he was there. “Have you also become more of an adult? I don’t think I ever expected you to own a couch. You even have a matching loveseat.”

 Kakashi snorted. “Don’t be silly, Tenzou. This is all Sakura’s doing. Once she finished with Naruto, she moved on to me and rambled on about homes and not just places to sleep until I gave in and let her take me furniture shopping.”

 Yamato laughed. “Sounds like her.”

 Kakashi opened his eyes to point a finger up at him and warned, “She’ll get to you at some point, too. Better make sure your house is in order.”

 “I actually have furniture in my house, senpai. It may not get used very much but it’s there.”

 Kakashi chuckled and closed his eyes again. “I suppose you do.”

 They drifted into a comfortable silence and Yamato wondered if Kakashi was going to fall asleep right there. Then, Kakashi winced and brought his hand up to the side of his head. Yamato sighed in sympathy and moved his fingers to massage at Kakashi’s temple. Kakashi dropped his hand back to his side with a heavy sigh.

 “You should have Sakura look at your eyes.”

 “I’m fine,” Kakashi lied. Yamato rolled his eyes but didn’t push, deciding to leave it for later.

 He did let some sarcasm slip into his voice though. “Sure, you are, Kakashi.”

Kakashi tilted his head and looked up at him. “Well, I have you, don’t I? I think I’ll be fine.”

 Yamato knew he meant it to come off teasingly. But with Kakashi’s head in his lap in the quiet of his apartment and how soft his tired voice was, it felt strangely intimate.

 Yamato smiled; his gaze warm when he met Kakashi’s. “I’m no medical ninja.”

 Kakashi chuckled, tapping him lightly in the stomach. “I think I’ll keep you anyway.”

 ***

 “Cat?” Kakashi called out to him, not even looking up from the mission reports in front of him.

 Yamato dropped down beside him with a slight bow. “Yes, Hokage-sama?”

 Kakashi shifted in his seat and Yamato could see his jaw lock. But it wasn’t like he could call him Kakashi-senpai while he was in uniform. Kakashi shrugged it off and motioned with his fingers.

 Yamato came to stand beside his shoulder and Kakashi held up a mission report. “What do you think about this?”

 Yamato read through it quickly, seeing the points that probably made Kakashi worried and told him. It was ANBU and heavily coded, but they had both been in the field long enough to read it with ease. Yamato handed it back to him after a moment and Kakashi sighed. “That’s what I thought. Thank you, Cat.”

 Yamato nodded and flickered back to his corner.

  Kakashi did the same thing three more times over the next two weeks and Yamato had to finally comment. “Hokage-sama, you can always talk over any ANBU mission reports with the Commander.”

 Kakashi waved dismissively. “Why do that when you’re right here?”

 Yamato fought back a sigh. He knew Kakashi thought Commander Matsuda was an idiot and had been hinting that Yamato should take over the position, but Yamato wasn’t interested. Even ignoring the blatant showcase of favoritism from Kakashi firing the Commander and Yamato filling the position afterwards, he didn’t want it and he had told him as much.

 “Hokage-sama.”

 Kakashi glanced at him and it was like he could see the look Yamato was giving him through the mask. He might as well have with how long they’d known each other. He shrugged, a cheeky smile on his lips. “Well, you don’t mind helping out your handsome Hokage, do you, Cat?”

 Yamato rolled his eyes at him. “Of course not, Hokage-sama.”

 ***

                “You seem a little preoccupied.”

                Yamato had heard him come in through the front door, not even bothering to knock. But Yamato hadn’t moved from his spot on the back porch, knowing he would find him easily enough.

                He leaned back on his hands and glanced up at Kakashi as he leaned against a beam to his porch. “What makes you say that, Kakashi?”

                Kakashi chuckled and moved to sit next to him. He bumped his shoulder against his and smiled. “I don’t know. Have you always had a forest in your backyard, Tenzou?”

                Yamato glanced back at the yard and actually looked at it, realizing how many trees he’d sprouted. He felt himself blush and sighed. “I must’ve been a bit spaced out.”

                The unspoken question hung in the air, but Yamato didn’t answer it and Kakashi let it fall to the ground without comment. He laid back against the porch beside him and said wistfully, “Maybe I can live in there. Build a nice cottage. You can bring me food and I’ll have my Icha Icha. I’d never have to go to work again.”

                Yamato laughed and glanced down at him. “Do I just tell everyone you disappeared?”

                Kakashi smiled at him and shrugged. “You’ve kept all my other secrets. This one shouldn’t be too difficult.”

                Yamato snorted and laid down next to him, resting his head on his arm. “You know, it sounds like a great plan and all. But I really don’t think the forest is that big.”

                Kakashi sighed. “Then, I guess you have a lot of work ahead of you.”

                Yamato chuckled and turned his head towards Kakashi. He got a smile in return that made him melt. “I guess so.”

 ***

                Kakashi leaned against the counter beside him and told him, “You know, I hate having an ANBU guard. It’s ridiculous, giving me a title that means strongest in the village and then giving me bodyguards? And they’re always watching me, it’s creepy.”

                Yamato held back a laugh as he tossed food into a pan on the stove. “Kakashi, I am literally one of those creepy guards.”

                Kakashi rolled his eyes at him. “I don’t mean you.”

                Yamato chuckled and tried to console him. “They’re not inside the house, they’re just guarding it.”

                Kakashi insisted as he walked behind him to the fridge, “It’s still weird.” His fingers trailed down his arm as he went, and Yamato ignored the fluttering in his stomach.

                “You’ve been a guard a hundred times by now.”

                Kakashi shrugged and grabbed a water from the fridge. “I guess I just don’t like being on the receiving end.”

                Yamato hummed as he cooked, “I’m sure you’ll get used to it eventually. Besides it’s not even that bad. There’s only one guard in the office and it’s usually me.”

                Kakashi didn’t reply and Yamato vaguely heard a cabinet door open. Before he could look up, Kakashi had moved behind him and leaned his chin on Yamato’s shoulder, a ghost of a hand on his hip. Yamato stilled and watched as Kakashi’s hand reached around him to shake a spice over the pan. Yamato huffed and leaned back to look at him. He raised an eyebrow at him, and the man shrugged with a small laugh, a smirk on his face. He was always more maddening with his mask down, his teasing smiles more visible.

                “What? You didn’t add enough.”

                Yamato rolled his eyes and tried to calm his racing heart as Kakashi moved away like he hadn’t done anything out of the ordinary.

 ***

                Having dinner a few nights a week had become habit of theirs. It was usually at one of their places, Kakashi avoided the public like the plague since he became Hokage – at some point, they were going to have to try and break him out of it. But for now, they let him do as he pleased.

                They’d been at Kakashi’s and Yamato had already said his goodnight and headed to the door when Kakashi called out to him from the couch, “Why don’t you just stay the night?”

                Yamato turned around, a small smile on his lips. “Kakashi-senpai, it’s not that late. I don’t mind walking – “

                Kakashi looked at him over the back of the couch. “You haven’t been sleeping well lately, have you? Maybe having someone nearby will help.”

                Yamato sighed and stepped back towards him, crossing his arms over the back of the couch near Kakashi. “I thought I was hiding it well.”

                Kakashi put a hand on his arm and gave him a warm smile. “Mah, I think I just know you better than you think.”

                Yamato chuckled and met his eyes. “I guess you do.”

                Kakashi broke his gaze and then patted his arm before standing up. “Don’t bother with the couch. It’s uncomfortable to sleep on.”

                With a wave of his hand, Kakashi walked towards his bedroom. Yamato glanced at the couch and then followed after him with a small smile.

 Yamato had slept beside Kakashi countless times before, so it wasn’t that big of a deal. But he was still thankful the bed was more than big enough for them both. Kakashi laid on the side facing the window and Yamato felt like it was intentional to help him feel safe. It seemed Kakashi would always know him better than he thought. He wasn’t too surprised by it, but it was nice sometimes, to not have to say anything, to not have to explain. Kakashi understood him and wouldn’t ever judge him.

 He didn’t know what kind of expression he had but it made Kakashi quirk a smile at him and ask softly, “What?”

 “Nothing.” Yamato shrugged against his pillow, a smile still on his lips.

 Kakashi raised an eyebrow but didn’t push. His voice felt warm when he told him, “Good night, Tenzou.”

 “Good night, senpai,” Yamato replied as Kakashi rolled over on to his side, his back to him.

 Yamato watched his hair move against the pillow as he tried to get more comfortable. How his breathing steadily got slower, the rise and fall of his shoulder. Yamato felt himself mumble as he closed his eyes, “Thank you, Kakashi.”

 ***

 Yamato hadn’t spoken to him since they got back a few hours ago. Hadn’t spoken to him the rest of their way back to the village. He had just been so angry, and Yamato didn’t want his emotions to take control of his tongue. Even if now, he didn’t feel that much better. After a quick but brutal meeting with Commander Matsuda, Yamato almost felt like life was playing some cruel joke on him.

 His anger had mixed with some sadness and it was a heavy weight in his chest. Maybe he should’ve given it some more time, but his feet had carried him here and he wasn’t about to walk away now. Kakashi answered the door before he could even knock on it.

 Normally, Yamato might’ve felt some sliver of amusement at the sheer trepidation on Kakashi’s face, but not today.

 Kakashi opened the door wide enough for him to walk in and he did so without a word. Yamato slipped off his shoes and walked to the middle of the living room, feeling Kakashi’s eyes on his back. He took a deep breath before turning towards him.

 “Kakashi, what the hell?”

 Kakashi sighed and stepped off the wall he’d been leaning on. “Tenzou, I didn’t even get hurt. I don’t – “

 “You’re the damn Hokage!” Yamato waved his hands in front of him. “You don’t step in front of an ANBU guard when we get attacked!”

 Kakashi looked off to the side, his jaw locking. “That shouldn’t even matter.”

 “Well, it does!” Yamato took a step towards him, the anger he’d felt over the whole day coating his ribs. “I am your guard, Kakashi, it’s my job to protect you. Not the other way around.”

 Kakashi’s face broke and he turned back to him, his eyes narrowing. “I hate being the damn Hokage, Tenzou! How do you expect me to just stand around and let you get hurt? Especially when it’s because of me. Because some assholes in a bingo book want to make it big by taking out a Kage.”

 Yamato let out a breath. “I know, Kakashi. But you have to trust me sometimes.” He felt some of his anger slip away, replaced by hurt. His voice quietened and he looked away from him. “After all these years together and you can’t just let me have this. Let me protect you. Hell, you couldn’t even trust me to protect myself.”

 Kakashi closed the distance between them and grabbed his arm. “Tenzou, it’s not like that. I just – “

 “Kakashi, I’ve been in ANBU over twenty years. You think some low rank assassin was going to take me out? I had that handled, you didn’t need to step in. What if you had gotten hurt? Did it ever cross your mind about how that would’ve made me feel?” Yamato met his eyes, his chest tightening when the grip on his arm did.

 Kakashi broke their gaze and looked down at his chest. “No, it didn’t.”

 Yamato huffed and stepped back from him, but Kakashi only reached out for him again. “I’m sorry. It’s not like – I know you could have but I can’t…” Kakashi sighed and looked off to the side as the sentence trailed off.

 “Can’t what, Kakashi?” Yamato’s voice was almost pleading as he stared at Kakashi’s face, wishing they weren’t having this argument and that he didn’t have to watch the mix of emotions clouding Kakashi’s eyes. It had been years since he wasn’t able to read him, but he had no idea what was going through the man’s mind right now and he hated it.

 But he also felt like they needed this, even if it hurt.

 Kakashi looked back to him after a moment, dropping his hand from his arm. His voice was quiet but heavy. “I can’t lose you.” He breathed out and then reached up to pull his mask down. It was nowhere near the first time he’d seen Kakashi’s face, but the action still startled the breath from his lungs. “After everything… and everyone, I can’t lose you, too, Tenzou. Not you.”

 Yamato felt like something was stuck in his throat and he had to swallow it down before speaking again. His voice was softer, and he told him, “Kakashi, I don’t want you stepping in front of me like that.”

 Kakashi nodded but Yamato wasn’t foolish enough to think he’d won the argument. He tried for a smile, the dimple in his cheek now visible. “I won’t promise anything.”

 Yamato knew he wouldn’t, even before coming over here. He gave a reluctant nod and took a deep breath before telling him, “I’ve been dismissed from your guard.”

 Kakashi eyes widened and he cursed, “Matsuda? That fucking idiot. I wasn’t even hurt and it’s not like it would’ve been your fault.” Kakashi pulled away from him, tugging up his mask up and stepping towards the door. “It’s my guard. Who the hell does he think – “

 Yamato didn’t go after him, knowing his next words would stop him. He kept his eyes on his back and said, “Someone who is in a romantic relationship with the Hokage shouldn’t be placed on his guard.”

 Kakashi’s feet stopped a few steps from him but he didn’t turn around. Yamato’s heart hammered in his chest in the seconds it took him to reply. He sighed and asked quietly, “What did you tell him?”

 Yamato chuckled and leaned his shoulder against the wall, his chest tight. “What do you think, Kakashi? I resigned.”

 When Kakashi turned around, he looked at him almost heartbroken. Yamato bitterly thought it was ironic. “You didn’t need to do that.”

 Yamato smiled and looked off to the side. “Kakashi, I’ve never wanted to be in ANBU my whole life. The only reason I went back after the war was because they made you Hokage and I wanted to be in your guard.”

 His eyes went back to him as Kakashi stepped towards him, his feet carefully placed against the floor. Yamato’s pulse was pounding in his ears and a voice in his head was telling him to stop talking. But he didn’t listen to it this time and the words spilled from his lips, his voice a lot calmer than he felt.

 “I love you. I’ve been in love with you what seems like my whole life and I don’t think that’s ever going to change. There’s never been anyone else, Kakashi, it’s always been you and it’s always going to be you. And I accepted a long time ago that things may never change. That you may never feel the same way or just not want to chance it. Because it doesn’t matter. I love you and I just want to see you happy, take care of you, in any way you’ll have me. I applied to be on your guard because I wanted to be by your side, to protect you.” He glanced down at the floor, a small laugh escaping him as he felt his eyes burn. “And you wouldn’t even let me have that.”

 Kakashi had closed the distance between them as he talked, and Yamato felt hands grabbing his face. Kakashi brought his head up and Yamato met his eyes, feeling breathless from the heat that was clouded there. Kakashi’s voice was thick as he told him softly, his mask down again, “I’ve never deserved that kind of devotion.”

 Yamato smiled at him and shrugged, replying back barely above a whisper, “I gave it to you anyway.”

 Kakashi pressed his lips against his and Yamato felt his breath catch as he closed his eyes. They stayed like for a moment, Kakashi close to him with his hair brushing across his forehead and his lips against his. Kakashi’s thumb stroked across his skin and the movement was so gentle Yamato felt like it might break him.

 Kakashi leaned his forehead against his and his voice was wrecked with emotion as he said, “I love you.”

 Yamato felt his chest shake and pleaded back, “Don’t say it just to say it.”

 He opened his eyes to see Kakashi looking at him with a smile. “I wouldn’t,” he promised.

 Yamato moved his arms up his chest and around his neck to pull him back to his lips.

 ***

 Kakashi gave him a sleepy smile and then sighed. “Tenzou, I think you’re a bit of an idiot.”

 Yamato snorted and turned his face into the pillow. “You need to work on your bedroom talk.”

 Kakashi laughed and slipped his fingers through Yamato’s hair to bring his face back into view. The smile he gave him made Yamato melt as their eyes met. “Tenzou, I adore you. How could you have never noticed that?”

 Yamato felt his heart stutter in his chest and his face flush, but he couldn’t break Kakashi’s gaze, his eyes searching his. “Could’ve fooled me.”

 Kakashi chuckled and raised an eyebrow. “Apparently.”

 Yamato sighed and wrapped an arm around his waist to pull him closer to him. Kakashi went easily, leaning forward to kiss him on the lips. Yamato leaned his forehead against his and looked down at the sheets between them. “I don’t know, Kakashi. There were times I thought you did but I second guessed myself. Maybe you did and you just didn’t want to pursue it. Maybe I was imagining things.”

 “You weren’t imagining anything.”

 Yamato looked back to him and then wondered how often Kakashi had looked at him like that. Tender, affectionate. It felt so familiar and Yamato wondered if he really was an idiot, having convinced himself so much that he’d be fine if Kakashi never returned his feelings that in turn, he’d convinced himself it wouldn’t ever happen. Over the last few years, he’d felt like there was something between them, but when Kakashi didn’t push any further, he figured he just wanted them to stay the way they were. It had been a more heartbreaking thought than if he’d just imagined the looks and the lingering touches.

 “I think you’re a bit of an idiot too.”

 Kakashi sighed and agreed, “Probably am.”

 Yamato laughed and Kakashi smiled in response. It faded a bit and then he told him, quietly, “I didn’t want to encompass your life more than I already had. You’ve looked up to me so much since we met, and I didn’t want to ask more from you. Like I told you earlier, I’ve never deserved that level of devotion. I know you think I saved you, but you saved me more than I think you’ll ever realize.”

 Yamato kissed him and repeated the sentiment from earlier, “I think I’ll give it to you anyway.”

 ***

 Yamato had been walking down the street from the market when she came up beside him. Yamato smiled at her, not having seen her much since he left ANBU. Yugao was rarely out of uniform.

 She bumped her arm against his. “So, you really resigned, huh?”

 Yamato chuckled and looked at the street ahead of them. “I mean, I didn’t have much of a choice. I didn’t want to go back to the barracks.”

 “I know. I heard what happened.” She smiled and then sighed. “I don’t know how you two thought you could get away with it. Anyone who’s known either of you for long can see it. You flirt all the time. You spend most of your free time together. I’ve seen you leave his apartment in the morning – “

 Yamato cut her off, feeling his skin heat. “Okay, okay, I get it.”

 Yugao laughed and they were quiet for a moment. Then, she told him in a teasing voice, “I have to admit, it was really romantic how he just jumped in front of you like that.”

 Yamato scoffed. “Romantic? He was being an asshole.”

 Yugao chuckled with a shake of her head and told him sincerely, “I’m glad you two finally got your shit figured out.”

 Yamato felt like a sap, but said it anyway, “Me too.”

 She smiled and met his eyes, then looked away with a sigh. “I’m going to miss you.”

 “Then, don’t be a stranger.” Yamato reached out to wrap an arm around her shoulders. Yugao made a face but leaned into him all the same. “You have more than one civilian outfit, don’t you?”

 She nodded with a roll of her eyes. “I do. I’ll see you around.” She moved away from him, ruffling his hair, and stepping back. She sent him a small wave before disappearing down the street.

 ***

                Yamato could hear the argument as he opened the door.

                “Are you seriously threatening to sic Yamato on me? That’s low, Shizune.”

                “Well, maybe he could talk some sense into you since you won’t listen to me.”

                “I – “ Kakashi cut off as Yamato stepped into the room. He met his eyes and then dropped his gaze to his desk. He cleared his throat. “Anyway, as I was telling you earlier about the daimyo – “

                Yamato laughed as he walked closer to his desk. “No, no, what were you talking about?” He glanced to Shizune with a raised eyebrow.

                She pounced on the question and glared at the side of Kakashi’s head. “I have been telling him for two weeks to let me examine his eyes or at least go to Sakura. But he won’t listen to me.”

                Kakashi narrowed his eyes at her. “You’re such a snitch.”

                Shizune laughed and took a page from Tsunade’s book. “And you’re such a brat, Kakashi-sama.”

 Kakashi sighed and made the mistake of looking to Yamato for his defense. Yamato cocked an eyebrow at him. “What? You are a brat. You told me you were going to get your eyes checked a week ago.”

 Kakashi rolled his eyes and told him for the dozenth time, “I’m fine.”

                “Kakashi.”

 Kakashi met his gaze and then looked over to the still agitated Shizune. “Fine, but I’ll go see Sakura. Shizune might actually poke an eye out in revenge for me driving her crazy if I give her the opportunity.”

 Shizune huffed but didn’t deny it making Yamato chuckle. Yamato jerked his head towards the door. “Well, come on, then. I came to take you to lunch, anyway.”

 Kakashi tensed at his desk. “Now?”

 “Yes, now.” Yamato moved towards the door, hearing Kakashi mutter under his breath before falling into step beside him.

                Kakashi sighed once they were outside and slipped a hand into his pocket, grabbing Yamato’s with the other and tugging towards the opposite street from the hospital. “Really, Tenzou, I’m fine. We should just go eat and – “

                Yamato looked at him with a chuckle. “Kakashi, it’s not even going to take Sakura five minutes.”

                Kakashi groaned and tried again, “I don’t – “

                Yamato pulled on him and started walking. “Don’t bother. You’re going.”

                Kakashi sighed but stopped arguing and slipped his fingers in between his.

                 Sakura let out a frustrated sigh as she shined a light in his eyes. “Kakashi-sensei, you should’ve come to see me earlier.”

                Kakashi lazily replied, “Not like it would’ve made a difference.”

                Sakura rolled her eyes at him and pulled back to make some marks on her chart. “It might’ve.”

                Yamato shifted from one foot to the other where he stood beside Kakashi sitting on the exam table. “What’s wrong with him?”

                Sakura glanced at him before telling Kakashi reluctantly, “The sharingan damaged the nerves around your left eye. You won’t go blind, but it’s made your eyesight worse. It’s why you’ve been getting migraines. Trying to read with so much strain on your eyes isn’t good.” She looked back to her chart. “I can get some glasses ready for you, they’ll help.”

                “I don’t want glasses.”

                Sakura scoffed and didn’t look up from her paperwork. “You sound like a five-year-old.”

                Yamato laughed and Kakashi tsked, looking at him. “You know, I’m really tired of people telling me I’m acting like a child.”

                Yamato leaned in close to him and told him near his ear, “Then, stop acting like one.”

                Kakashi hit him in the arm with a half-hearted glare. “I’m not.”

                “Kakashi, why don’t you want glasses?” Sakura looked up at him and cocked an eyebrow.

                Kakashi shrugged and said simply, “I’ll look old.”

                It was an obvious lie, but Yamato didn’t call him out on it. “Kakashi, you know you will still look gorgeous as always. Stop being difficult.”

                Kakashi smiled and waved a hand at Sakura, telling him in a scandalized voice, “Not in front of the children, Yamato.”

                Yamato rolled his eyes with a smile while Sakura laughed. She raised her voice and told Kakashi in a no-nonsense tone she probably learned from Tsunade. “Kakashi, you’re getting glasses. They’ll be ready in an hour and you better go pick them up.”

                She gave him a look and tore a piece of paper from her clipboard, then gave it to Yamato. Kakashi sighed but didn’t argue as he stood up. He waved two fingers to Sakura as they walked out. “Thank you, Sakura-chan.”

 ***

                Yamato came into the bedroom after a shower to see Kakashi sitting on the bed turning his glasses over in his hands. Yamato fought back a sigh, feeling his chest tighten and climbed on to the bed beside him.

                Kakashi chuckled and joked, “You know, I was kidding earlier about looking old. But with the grey hair, they definitely add that kind of effect.”

                Yamato leaned towards him to kiss his cheek. “You do not look old, Kakashi.”

                Kakashi turned his head towards him, a teasing smirk on his lips. “You don’t think so?” Kakashi slipped the glasses on and leaned his head into the palm of his hand with an arched eyebrow. “How do they make me look then?”

                “Sexy,” Yamato told him without hesitation, then smirked at the hint of red at the tips of Kakashi’s ears.

                Kakashi closed the distance between them to kiss him, guiding Yamato on to his back. Yamato kissed him back, his arms wrapping around him to pull him closer as Kakashi settled in between his legs. Kakashi teased him against his lips, “Mah, I think you might have a glasses kink, Tenzou.”

                Yamato laughed into the kiss, tugging on the hair he had twisted around his fingers. “I do not.”

                Kakashi sucked on his bottom lip and told him in a low voice as one of his hands moved down Yamato’s side to his thigh, “I think you do.” He kissed across his jaw and Yamato leaned his head back with a heavy sigh. Kakashi made a frustrated noise after a moment and pulled back. Yamato looked at him in question as Kakashi took off his glasses. “Look. They’re all smudged now. I hate these damn things.”

                Yamato chuckled warmly and plucked them from his fingers to set on the bedside table. “You don’t have to wear them to bed, Kakashi.”

                Kakashi leaned back down, his hand moving to hold Yamato’s face. He gave him a soft look and then said with the upmost serious tone, “But what about your glasses kink?”

                Yamato snorted and pushed his face away, telling him between laughs, “I hate you.”

                Kakashi smiled and moved back to kiss him. “No, you don’t.”

 ***

                Yamato had always liked sleeping beside Kakashi. It wasn’t even about the closeness, having him near, or anything like that. What had really made him feel so much love in those moments, was the simple fact that Kakashi could fall asleep with him, easily and without fault. Of course, he would sleep well in his own home. But Yamato remembered stories from their ANBU days, rumors about how Kakashi-taichou had a bad habit of taking too many watches during missions, saying he couldn’t sleep well. Yamato hadn’t known what they were talking about since Kakashi had always been able to sleep when he was with him.

                It had made him feel so trusted and Yamato had held on to that feeling with bruised fingers for years.

                Kakashi was drifting into sleep now, his head resting just inches away from Yamato’s, their legs intertangled with his arm wrapped around Yamato’s side. Yamato reached up to hold his face and Kakashi’s eyes opened to look at him with a tired smile. “Hm?”

                Yamato smiled back and then told him quietly, “You know you’re more than the Copy Nin, don’t you?” He knew he’d hit the nail on the head at the barely concealed grimace.

                Kakashi snorted and said, “It’s one of my more flattering nicknames.”

                Yamato didn’t take the bait of a topic change. “Do you miss it that much?”

                Kakashi sighed and shrugged a shoulder. “I don’t know if I would say I miss it but, Tenzou, I had it almost twenty years. It’s hard to not…” He trailed off, looking down between them.

                “You were an amazing shinobi before you even got it, Kakashi.”

                Kakashi rolled his eyes, looking back to him with an exasperated smile. “You didn’t even know me then.”

                Yamato smiled. “I heard stories.”

                Kakashi chuckled lowly. “I’m sure they painted me in the most beautiful light.”

                Yamato sighed and used his hand to turn Kakashi’s face back towards his when the man looked away. “Kakashi, you don’t need it. You’re plenty skilled without it and I don’t think you’ve ever depended on it. Remember I’ve fought alongside you for years even, that never changed.”

                Kakashi grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to him. He kissed him and then leaned his forehead against his, admitting quietly as he closed his eyes, “I feel like I’m losing my touch.”

                Yamato laced their fingers together and rested their hands between them. “And I’m sure being stuck at a desk all day isn’t helping.”

                Kakashi shook his head and Yamato assured him in a soft voice with a smile, “You’re not losing your touch and I know you keep joking about it but you’re not old, Kakashi. You’re barely thirty.”

                Kakashi sighed and Yamato told him, “Even if you were, it doesn’t matter. If you’ve lived past your prime – which I don’t think you have – it’s fine, Kakashi.”

                Kakashi opened his eyes to look at him, a small smile on his lips. “Are you trying to tell me I’m more than some well-used tool in a shed?”

                Yamato snorted. “Something like that.” He raised an eyebrow at him. “Am I not doing a good job?”

                “You are.” Kakashi leaned forward to slant his lips over his and then told him after a moment, “I’ll… figure it out. You’ll have to be patient with me.”

                Yamato kissed him again and curled more around him, promising against his skin, “I’ll keep reminding you.”

 ***

              Yamato bolted upright in bed, his heart pounding in his chest as images lingered on the edges of his vision. He breathed out with his face in his hands, trying to will them away as he focused on the man lying beside him.

 It wasn’t real…

                He ran his fingers through his hair as he calmed down and looked down at Kakashi. He was watching him quietly, a comforting smile on his face, but he didn’t reach out for him. Didn’t touch him in case it would’ve been overwhelming. He’d learned it years ago before they even shared a bed on a nightly basis. When Yamato was panicked or stressed out, he didn’t like physical touch, his senses already overwhelming him. He liked people to wait until he calmed down enough before touching him. Kakashi was the opposite, that look in his eyes always calming when Yamato put a heavy hand on his shoulder, his grip tight in his clothes when he pulled him into a hug. It had always been ironic, and Yamato had quickly learned when they were in ANBU, Kakashi rarely reached out for anyone unless he needed it.

                When his breathing was back to normal and all he could see was Kakashi surrounded by sheets in their bed, he gave him a tentative smile. Kakashi opened his arms to him and Yamato fell into him, his arm tight around his waist. He sighed against his chest as Kakashi rubbed a hand up and down his back. Kakashi didn’t say anything. Yamato wasn’t able to go back to sleep and while he thought it was unnecessary, he was comforted from how Kakashi stayed awake with him and just simply held him.

 ***

                Yamato woke up groggily, his head pounding as his eyes adjusted to the bright white of the room. His mind was foggy, and he looked to the right to see Kakashi watching him closely. He was leaning back in his chair with one of his books in his lap and his ankles crossed on the edge of Yamato’s bed.

                Yamato sighed even as he smiled. Kakashi was always a welcome sight to wake up to. “Shouldn’t you be in your office, Kakashi-senpai?”

                Kakashi shrugged and told him, “Naruto’s watching over things for me.”

                Yamato barely nodded before he felt sleep take him again.

                It was night when he woke up again and Kakashi was still in the same position, a lamp turned on nearby so he could read. Yamato felt himself smile as he turned his head towards him. He told him softly, “Kakashi, you should go home and rest.”

                Kakashi chuckled and shook his head, turning another page. “I’m not going to go home to sleep while the man I love lies in a hospital bed.”

                Warmth filled his chest and Yamato didn’t argue with him. Kakashi stood up from his chair, laying his book to the side and siting on the edge of Yamato’s bed near his hip. He leaned over him, a hand cradling his face as he asked him, “How’re you feeling?”

                “Tired.” Yamato covered his hand with his own. “How long have I been asleep?”

                “Not long.” Kakashi raised an eyebrow at him, a crooked smile on his lips. “I’m not surprised you’re so tired. Breaking your arm and passing out will do that to you.”

                Yamato sighed and looked down at his right arm that was in a sling. “Didn’t Sakura heal this? Why is it in a sling?”

                “She doesn’t want you to use it for a few days.”

                Yamato groaned and leaned his head back. “Did she take me off the mission roster?”

                Kakashi chuckled and nodded. “For now. It’s what you get, you know.”

                “Like you’re one to talk. I’m at least not chakra depleted like you’re so fond of doing.”

                Kakashi rolled his eyes and leaned in closer to him. “No, but you are physically exhausted. She wants to keep you here for a few days to make sure you actually get some rest.”

                Yamato glanced at all the tubes that were hooked up to him and shifted uncomfortably. He looked back to Kakashi with a mischievous smile. “You should sneak me out.”

                Kakashi laughed and leaned back. Yamato turned his head to kiss the palm of Kakashi’s hand. “Come on, I know you hate this place as much as I do and if you insist on staying with me, then…”

                Kakashi stared at him for a moment and then stood up from the bed with a sigh. “Sakura’s going to kill me, you know.”

                Yamato grinned as Kakashi started silencing all the machines. “I’m sure she’ll kill me also, so you won’t die alone at least.”

                Kakashi snorted, gently pulling the IV from him and then covering it with a bandage. “You’re so romantic.”

                Yamato chuckled and Kakashi slowly pulled him up to sit. Yamato closed his eyes and waited for his head to adjust and stop making him dizzy. After he was sure he’d be fine, Kakashi went to another side of the room for a bag that had some clothes in it.

                Yamato supposed being Hokage had some perks to it. Luckily for them, Sakura wasn’t on shift and Kakashi strolled through the halls with his arm around Yamato’s waist like it was perfectly normal. A medic caught them as they were about to leave.

                “Yamato-san!” Yamato winced as she stopped in front of them. Her eyes flickered to Kakashi. “Kakashi-sama, Yamato-san is not set to be dismissed for two more days.”

                Kakashi waved a hand at her with a smile and lied through his teeth. “Sakura-sama told me it would be fine to take him home tonight. I’ll watch over him.”

                The woman looked at him confused and then back down to a clipboard in her hands. “No, she would’ve – it says right here that – “

                Kakashi started walking again and patted her on the arm as they went around her. “Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. Good night!”

 ***

              Yamato had his feet in Kakashi’s lap on the couch as he dozed on and off throughout the day. He hoped he would stop feeling so exhausted after another night. He was already tired of laying around the house and it had only been a day.

                Kakashi had made himself comfortable on the other end, one of his hands on Yamato’s calf as he read over another scroll. Papers and scrolls were scattered all over the coffee table. Yamato tapped his stomach with his foot. “You know by the time you go back, Naruto may not want to give you the hat back.”

                Kakashi chuckled and rolled his eyes. “It’s only for a few days, Tenzou. Don’t be so dramatic.”

                “So, what does it say on record? For your absence?” Yamato asked him curiously, knowing it was a little more difficult for Hokages to get some time off. Though he supposed having Naruto helped.

                The tips of Kakashi’s ears turned pink and he told him nonchalantly, “Family leave.”

                Yamato felt his heart swell and before he could reply, there was a knock on the door. Kakashi slipped out from under him and pulled up his mask. Yamato bit back a smile at how adorable he looked fixing his glasses over the edge of it.

                The door had only opened a second before Yamato heard her voice hiss, “You are a bad influence.”

                Kakashi sighed and followed Sakura to the living room. “Mah, Sakura-chan, it was his idea.”

                Sakura leaned over the back of the couch with a glare and threw the sling he’d left at the hospital at him. “Do you have any idea how angry I was when I walked in for my shift to be told you left in the middle of the night?”

                Yamato answered unsurely, “Very?”

                Sakura sighed and walked around the couch to kneel beside him. She put a hand to his forehead as her hand glowed green. “Are all retired ANBU like this or are you two just special, Yamato-taichou?”

                Yamato chuckled and said as her chakra swept through him, “ANBU have their own medics. We don’t usually go to the hospital unless it’s for life threatening injuries or something our medics can’t handle.”

                Sakura hummed and pulled her hand away before standing up. “Well, I’d like you to wear your sling, but if you’re going to act like a brat and not listen, at least don’t use your arm too much. Come see me in two days.” She stepped away and back towards the door, adding in a singing voice, “If you don’t, I won’t clear you for missions.”

                “I will,” Yamato called after her while Kakashi laughed softly, moving back to the couch.

***

                Yamato was too exhausted to react to the rustle of leaves in the trees above them. Trusting Genma enough to tell him if they were under attack.

                He didn’t expect the snort followed by a small weight landing next to him. Yamato opened his eyes and felt a tired smile at the sight of the two dogs standing by his side looking at him in concern. Yamato sat up more against the log he’d collapsed against as Genma stoked the campfire. “What’re you doing here?”

                Pakkun trotted up to lean his head against Yamato’s thigh. “Boss said you’re about two weeks late. He was getting worried.”

                Yamato felt some warmth gather in his chest as he reached down to scratch behind Pakkun’s ears. “Ran into some trouble. We should be back soon.”

                Pakkun nodded and glanced at Shiba. “I’ll let him know.”

                Yamato watched him sprint back into the trees and then Shiba walked over without a word to curl up beside him. Yamato chuckled and laid a hand on his back. “Sticking around?”

                Shiba only shifted his head to lay it on Yamato’s leg in lieu of an answer. Yamato smiled and glanced over at Genma. The man was giving him a smirk. “Man, you know the Hokage’s never checked in on me like that when I was a little late.”

                Yamato snorted and shook his head. “Not like he sent the ANBU, Genma.”

 ***

                “Dismissed.”

                Genma disappeared with a nod of his head and a pat to Yamato’s shoulder. As soon as the door closed, Yamato walked over to Kakashi with a tired smile. Kakashi took off his glasses and set them down on his desk, then turned in his chair towards Yamato and reached out a hand.

                Yamato took it and let Kakashi pull him forward as he tugged down his mask. He kissed him and chided, “You were getting me worried.”

                Yamato chuckled. “I could see that.”

                Kakashi narrowed his eyes at him and Yamato kissed him. “I’m fine, Kakashi.”

                Kakashi moved a hand to the back of his thigh and tried to pull him closer, making Yamato smile. “I’m not going to make out with you in your office, Kakashi.”

                Kakashi’s grip on him became firmer and Yamato let him coerce him into his lap as Kakashi told him against his lips, “But it would make things so much more interesting around here. Besides Shizune has the day off so I can have you all to myself.”

                Yamato rolled his eyes at him, vaguely aware of Yugao flickering from her post in the office to one outside. Kakashi’s mouth was on his again, kissing him slowly as his fingers slipped off his forehead protector and tossed it to the desk. Yamato sighed against him as a warm hand slid under his shirt and up his back.

                There was a knock on the door and before Yamato could react, Kakashi had switched their positions and was sliding to the floor. Yamato looked at him confused, glancing at the door as the person continued knocking. Kakashi held a finger to his lips and Yamato should’ve known he meant trouble from the sly grin on his face.

                Yamato stayed quiet, thinking the person would just go away, but then the door opened. Yamato looked up at it as Kakashi moved back under his desk, dragging the rolling chair Yamato was on closer to him. He met the eyes of the person who had just walked into the room and then felt a hand start to snake up thigh.

                Kakashi wouldn’t…

                “Ah, Mitokado-san.” Yamato tried for a kind smile, feeling his heart rate pick up as Kakashi’s hand went up further. “The Hokage-sama just stepped out of the office.”

                Mitokado looked at him annoyed, but it was a common expression on the man’s face. “And why are you here instead?”

                Yamato felt his pants zipper being dragged down and then Kakashi’s hand was on him. His breath caught in his throat and he moved a hand under the desk to tangle his fingers in Kakashi’s hair in warning.

                “Oh, well, I had just finished giving him a mission report and was visiting with him. My mission was long and it had – ” Yamato swallowed thickly, thanking all his years in ANBU for his ability to keep his face composed as Kakashi’s hand started to stroke him. Yamato coughed to cover up a groan. “ – been a while since I had seen him.”

                Mitokado hummed, giving him a disapproving look. “Well, where is he at now?”

                Yamato held back a moan with more than a little effort as Kakashi’s tongue dragged along the underside of his cock. Yamato’s fingers tightened in his hair, but he doubted Kakashi saw it as anything besides encouragement.

                Oh, you know, just under the desk sucking my cock.

                “He went down to one of the shops to grab us some tea.” Yamato let out a breath and then coughed again. His smile felt more strained. “You know, Mitokado-san, I’m not sure how long it will take him. Maybe you should come by tomorrow instead. I’ll tell him you stopped by.”

                Mitokado huffed and turned on his heel. “I guess so.”

                Yamato almost let a curse out when Kakashi’s lips wrapped around him. Yamato yanked on his hair and could’ve sworn he heard a quiet chuckle from under the desk.

                Mitokado looked over his shoulder at Yamato with his hand on the doorknob. “Did you say something, Yamato-san?”

                Yamato could only shake his head and Mitokado narrowed his eyes at him. “You know, even if the Hokage doesn’t mind you sitting at his desk like that, I don’t really think it’s appropriate.”

                Oh, you’ve no idea how inappropriate this is.

                Yamato was on edge and felt the words slip out of his mouth before he could think of something more polite. “Well, I suppose I’m lucky you’re not my Hokage, aren’t I, Mitokado-san?”

                Mitokado scoffed and left without another word. Yamato moved the chair back as soon as the door shut and glared down at Kakashi. “The hell is wrong with you?”

                Kakashi only smirked at him before leaning forward and bringing his mouth to Yamato’s cock again. Yamato felt a shuddering breath leave him and couldn’t find any strength to fight him. He came moments later, Kakashi’s name falling from his lips in a broken whisper. Kakashi swallowed him down, then stood up and leaned over the chair. He kissed him as he tucked Yamato back into his pants.

                Yamato kissed him back, feeling lax against the chair. His hand was still buried in Kakashi’s hair and he mindlessly massaged at where he’d yanked on the silver locks. He told him against his mouth, “I’m going to kill you one of these days.”

                Kakashi laughed and pulled back to look at him with a beautiful smile. “My, my, Tenzou, such words to say to your Hokage.”

                Yamato couldn’t even muster up a glare for him and simply pulled him back in for another kiss.

#kakayama #9.4k #rated m #kat writes #naruto

[noneatnonedotcom]

the impossible boy chapter 2

@weatherman667​ here’s the second chapter you inspired and a third on the way. because apparently someone mentioning kilts offhandedly is enough to kick my muse into gear >:( i hope you all enjoy

________________________________________________________________

Jaune looked at his battalion. 300 men all under his command. One company devoted entirely to infantry. 150 men all ready for battle. The other 150 were support. Three troupes of 50 divided up for various jobs. One for artillery. With five men to a gun. Rail guns required less crewmen to operate with their sliding block breech system but that was still three men to work the gun with one acting as sights and the other acting as commander.

Ten big guns to control an entire battle field.

Then you had the other troupe. Another fifty men for ammo supplies and food. While each regiment could forage and hunt for it’s own food and each fireteam was expected to do so. They still kept a supply of rations for times when foraging was simply impossible. Not to mention the ammo supplies and various tools they would need and the medical supplies. The quarter masters troupe mainly acted as go-fors. Ferrying ammo and medical supplies to wherever they needed them.

Finally they had the brainy bastards themselves the specialists.

The engineers, medics, and not less than ten huntresses. Just in case. And the color guard. Two men with the standards, eight pipers, six drummers.

He’d trained with these men and women

He’d fought with these soldiers

He’d grown up with them as brothers and sisters in the clann as they fought to protect their family.

Even now from his perch on the roof of beacon he could see what they were doing in his mind's eye clear as day.

His sister would step out holding his scepter. They all snapped to attention riffles on the ground beside them.

She would explain that he wasn’t coming back with them and give the orders he’d left her with.  No one would make a fuss; they're too disciplined for that but no one would be happy the clann should be with it’s own. That was how they lived their entire lives.

But they would complete their missions.

“Right shoulder, ARMS” as one they brought their weapons up resting them on their shoulder butt in hand “sling, ARMS” once again as one they did as commanded readying their weapons for travel. “Salute at sling, arms!” they brought their left hand over to hold the sling as they brought their right hands up in salute. He returned the gesture they were facing each other. He could see them and they him but it was too far away.

He should be down there with them

“Order, arms”  the salute dropped and they stood ready. His sister gave him one last look goodbye. No one was happy about this, it was clear. But it had to be done “right, face” they turned away from him “forward, march!” as one they stepped forward. Once they were away from the eyes of the city they would march at ease. But for now it was time to show some discipline

Eight pipers played at the front of the line his sister having taken his scepter earlier was leading them out. Behind those eight pipers were six drummers behind them the color guard holding the standards of the army then the various troups with the specialists first. Then the infantry then the quarter masters with their waggons. Then the artillery pulled by horses they’d unlocked the aura for.

The people of vale marveled at their disiplin as they stepped in time. Huntresses were the only military they’d seen for a long time and they weren’t exactly what he’d call a cohesive unit. Effective maybe but not easy to control.

He watched them as they paraded out of the city. He watched as they went over the hill.

He wanted desperately to go with them.

He turned away, finally, and walked towards beacon. the deal was that his clann got the help they needed if he stayed here, he’d given his word he would

An Arc never goes back on their word

________________________________________________________________

Weiss hurried along the mostly empty halls, the heels of her shoes making satisfying clicks that kept rhythm with her pounding heart. She was sure she had nothing to worry about. She was excelling at every subject, as was her norm. It was just annerving to be called to Salem's office. Just as she rounded the corner she caught sight of a flash of white.

Weiss let out a pained groan at the same time as a much deeper and definitely deeper grunt of pain.

Without thought she began to apologise. "Forgive me. I was rushing and not looking where I was going." It was only polite, though every idiot knew when walking into the hall to traffic stayed to the right and from traffic maintained the left.

"It certainly isnae. aam jist as much tae blame if nae mair. see Ah was distracted by th' cealin'. i've ne'er seen th' loch. sae much detail in somethin' sae high abune. mebbe it's a way ay remindin' us mere mortals 'at sic' lofty heights ur abune us."

Weiss blinked as the male in front of her came into focus. The brilliant white of his ruffled shirt was the first thing she noticed, followed by the blue and green...battle skirt? Then his words penetrated her head. He was gazing at the ceiling? Her eyes involuntarily lifted to the masterpiece that was beacons exalted ceilings.

"I'm sorry, did I hear you say you were admiring the art?"

A huge grin split across the man's face wrinkling the corners of his celestial blue eyes. "Aye. 'at Ah was lass. ur ye steady? ur dae ye need a bit mair time loongin' against me chest? nae 'at Ah min'. names jaune arc. an' eh'd ask fur yer nam but aiblins angels dornt hae names only beautiful faces."

Heat crept up Weiss's face as she pulled herself away from him. She ran sweaty palms over the front of her dress. "Yes. Well..." What was wrong with her? Surely it wasn't because she was attracted to a man simply because he had an appreciation for art and good taste to notice some most never did.

She cleared her throat and steadied herself before lifting her chin and looking him squarely in the eyes. "I hope you enjoy your time gazing at the art. I'd offer to show you the gallery but I'm needed for a meeting with headmistress Salem."

His golden brows rose. "Ah 'en mebbe ye can help me thaur. aam supposed tae see th' quine myself though th' ceilin' fair distracted me."

Weiss bit the inside of her cheek so as not to return the easy smile of this....man. she'd do well to remember that men were little more than decorations themselves.

Offering her arm as Manors dictated she was only affected minutely when she felt his hand wrap around her arm. His hands were calloused and rough against her bare skin and it for whatever reason sent chills racing down her spine.

"It would be my pleasure to escort you headmistress Salem's offices,"she said stiffly.

The walk back was fairly quiet not for lack of trying on his part though. He’d made conversation about just about every piece of art he’d seen. He wouldn’t say he was a conoscere but his lessons included a lot. He was knowledgeable enough to hold conversation and in his areas of expertise, namely the manuscripts they had kept in the castle library, he was more than just a bit informed.

Nothing seemed to help though every time he thought he was making progress the girl would clam up. The sight of the headmistress standing outside the elevator with a very stern looking woman was almost a relief if not for the almost undisguised glare she leveled at him, the head mistress though seemed to smirk

“Lord Arc” she said with a small curtsy.

Well that was interesting she knew his title and the proper way to greet him according to highlander customs. Big bows were only for mocking people. It implied that their egos are so fragile that you had to be over the top to keep them happy. And for a people whose entire culture revolves around ability and resilience, well being called fragile was a very big insult.

But still she’d shown courtesy in only giving a small bow he would have to show courtesy as well. Now the question was elaborate bow or small nod

Jaune ran out of time and panicked as he came face to face with the headmistress

He stuck out his right hand for a hand shake

What the fuck jaune!

She seemed to study him after that and jaune was truly thankful to the lord that losing to his sisters and clansmen had given him an excellent poker face after all this time

“Quine salem yer skale is brammer th' art is inspirin' an' th' groonds weel kept. Ah thenk ye fur th' opportunity tae see them” he said keeping his best commander face on he’d just greeted her as one military leader to another it wasn’t a breach of conduct for either culture but to people who knew of highlander ways it implied that he would not take orders, that he was outside her control and the etiquette that should bind him.

It made it seem like he was refusing to be a hostage

“I saw your men marched out of the city today, they were truly something to behold” she said taking his offered hand “how long were you with them for?”

“Thes is th' first time in mah life Ah hae bin awa' frae them.” he said carefully. Where was she going with this? “Ye seem tae ken much ay mah fowk.”

“I spent some time amongst clan Mac Arthur in my youth”

“Sae only puckle days ago 'en?”

“My, aren’t you a charmer?” she said with a small smile “glynda i have some affairs to handle with Lord Arc, please wait for miss nikos here with miss schnee i will be with them momentarily” the woman glynda, seemed ready to argue when the headmistress cut her off with a glare “i am aware of the propriety of the situation but i assure you it is utterly necessary.” a moment passed between them that seemed to stretch into an hour

“Understood headmistress” glynda said finally “though I fail to understand the purpose”

“I will thank you to keep personal opinions from affecting your decision making skills”

They stepped into the elevator, it seemed there was dissension amongst the ranks

“If you’d rather we can speak in Gaelic here” she said simply, she was superb almost like she’d spoken it for a lifetime

“Very well, lets” he said simply

“Glynda will come around”

“I have no intention of changing her mind, headmistress. I am here to fulfill a treaty, nothing more.” shit he shouldn’t have said it like that

“Oh? And here i heard you came looking for adventure” she knew a lot but he had no time to figure out how she knew it

“I’ve found that what value it has to offer seems to be very limited,” he said, still not looking to the side of him. Years of standing at attention having a great effect on his ability to let nothing he was feeling slip out. Good thing too because he felt like screaming and ripping his own hair out,

What the fuck was he saying?

“I’m sorry to hear that. The highlanders would make a great ally”

“You’ve enemies enough that you seek allies?” he asked, letting a little surprise into his voice “is there to be another war then?”

“There’s always another war” she said simply

“Yes,” he said looking forward “good thing too, I've got job security”

“I’ve found that war gets very little, lord Arc, only heart ache”

“I’ve found that the only way to get what you want is war, headmistress” jaune what the fuck are you doing? “But then again I've never really seen peace so i may be biased” okay that’s good keep going in that direction “i have to wonder if it truly exists, or if it’s not just a brief armistice in an endless war”

She looked over at him now “you’ll have to forgive me,” she said sounding curious “I forgot I was dealing with a highlander, not some puffed up girl with dreams of heroism” she smiled “you’ve seen war have you not? What was your impression of it?”

“A natural reaction to lack” he said honestly, “the opposite of war is not peace, but creation” he looked at her now “war is destruction in an attempt to preserve” he thought back to the clansmen he’d buried

“I think that is the wisest thing I've ever heard said about war,” she said as the doors opened okay good they were on the right track and the atmosphere had clearly lightened. “What would you say to helping me create something new here?” the hall they walked down was filled with portraits, former head mistresses. He noticed something though. Most of the portraits looked like the current head mistress

No they were the current head mistress. Every other painting was her. Sometimes there’d be gaps where others were put in charge but it would always go back to her

“My family has a history of leading this school you see”

He did see “impressive, you look like them”

“Are my looks that impressive to you?” she asked not looking back

“I” he squeaked, he cleared his throat quickly “I did not mean that” she was hot though he meant what he said earlier she seemed young “I mean that your line was impressive”

“Thank you, we’ve accomplished much all together but I fear it pales in comparison to your clan” she said opening the door to her office.

It looked like a throne room with gold and white marble abounding banners of various houses hung with the coat of arms for the beacon school being directly behind the throne. Her desk was at the base of the stairs leading up to the throne.

“But in the time we’ve had we’ve created much” she said walking forward and sitting behind her desk as she motioned him to sit. She leaned forward

“I suspect you’re here because you seek to create something great as well am i right?”

Don’t say anything jaune “yes” god damn it jaune!

“Then let’s discuss your classes for the year,” she said with a smile

________________________________________________________________

so lemme here your thoughts on the world I've build and what you think of the plot line so far. and what you think of the adjusted characters

#Jaune Arc #sallem #the impossible boy #rwby au

[tricksterkraze]

Finally finished this lovely piece of Rayla in some royal Katolian wear based on a wonderful fanfic by @lucia_gemma_antir called "My Devotion and Mah Protection, Our Love" (Rated M) #rayllum #tdp #raylathedragonprince #raylatdp #thedragonprince https://www.instagram.com/p/B8lNudznk5M/?igshid=19iojpqymjv87

#rayllum #tdp #raylathedragonprince #raylatdp #thedragonprince

[rachaelhaynes92-blog]

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[chloe-clegane]

IT FINALLY CAME!

I’m so excited, I ordered this from Redbubble at the beginning of June and it’s finally here! Sor-bear is absolutely adorable in all his tipsy glory. 

Thank you thank you thank you @eerna​ for the amazing art. You can get your own here, support our lovely eerna on Redbubble :) You can get stickers too btw. 

I get to wear annoyed Rayla around and I am ready for it.

#My Devotion and Mah Protection #Rayllum #Soren #Sor-bear #I love Soren and I will kill for him #Drunk Wedding speeches are always entertaining #Rayla #Callum #Redbubble #Support our amazing fan artist #Rayllum Art #My Fic #ignore my sun burned nose #my writing

[fixationally-consumed]

A little visual help, please?

@chloe-clegane Could I link the artwork from “My Devotion and Mah Protection” in my fanfic to describe the dress Rayla is wearing? The fic is at https://archiveofourown.org/works/32751484/chapters/81257581 if you’re curious. I loved reading your story and wanted to include the artwork, if that’s okay!

It’s the picture of Rayla and Callum dancing at their wedding. I would use this link: https://chloe-clegane.tumblr.com/post/624674237974708224/a-commission-for-chloe-clegane-of-a-couple-of 

#THE DRAGON PRINCE

[leocheg]

Okay, harringrove hit me like a train, and now it’s just my naked bones rattling all over the railway.

I’m seriously so torn. I feel sick just thinking about watching season 3 for the very possible pain of it all, you know, Steve getting assigned a new gf, Billy getting killed off, all the antis shitposting under my sweet sweet otp’s tag...

On the other hand, I really want to believe the Duffers are trolling with all that “ohh a textbook enigmatic alt chickkkk! Billy’s just a dumb villainnnn, it’s gonna get worssssse! Everybody who you love from season 1 will DIEEEE!” Is this show really supposed to be that shallow? Does it really need that cheap hype? Frankly speaking, I don’t know what I expect from a Netflix tv pop show. I just hoped that the series made for geeks by geeks would somehow go deeper than “a human villain” esp since that “villain” is a 17 yo with daddy issues, and honestly making a piece of irredeemable trash out of a troubled teen (srsly he didn’t even have a knife or anything on him) is a total dick move on behalf of everyone responsible.

Now it’s time for me to explain why Billy isn’t deserving of all the crap he’s been given by the fandom. And okay, okay, I won’t put I JUST LOVE MAH BAYBEEEEHHHH all over the list.

First of all, I suggest to take a step back and take in the starting point. Billy’s a 17 yo guy, with an okay(ish?) step-mom, his actual mom being most probably dead (I’m not sure but I feel in the US it’s more common for women to get custody after divorce?) and a dad who gives Billy constant shit over the smallest things. Let’s not forget two more things: this 17 yo is supposed to be responsible for a 13 yo (dunno about you, I’d be super pissed off, because girls this age can give you HELL, boys give you HELL a bit later), and for whatever fuck up they both committed he’s exiled from his home place which means no memory of his mom apart from that little thing he always wears on that chain (is that just my hc tho?), no friends, no possible family like caring aunts-uncles-nanas-grandpas, no voice in the family. As I see the situation judging from those little snippets we gather from the conversations, Billy could have fucked up looking after Max, probably big time, probably it had smth to do with Susan’s ex and Max’s dad, so Neil had them packing and moving across the whole country. I just wonder how bad could that fuck up have been that Billy got guilt-tripped so badly he wasn’t able to say no and stay in Cali somehow? HE’S CRAZY LIKE THAT ANTIS HUH? It’s also not a thing a caring parent would do out of the blue, Billy had only a year before graduation. I believe Neil to love his son and care for his future, fight me. BUT. When you are a responsible parent with some skill for communication and actually understanding what you’re doing and that there’s an independent individual in front of you, not an abstract child like whatever that word even means apart from age, you don’t hit them, you don’t shout, you don’t impose. My point being that Neil is freaking out. He’s got two teens on his hands, you gotta be strict not to let them go crazy rebellious, right? He’s desperate to keep his son in line, denying everything he really is at the moment. What is he though? Well, a super lonely teen who wants his dad to be proud of him. I think he tries really hard to follow that “respect and responsibility” mantra: gives Max a lift no problem, tries to come to terms that they are family now, tries to protect her. Which brings me to the question of racism, and no, I don’t think he’s racist at all. I don’t think he cares, he’s got a lot going on already.What he cares about is agitated Max. Remember the way she left the arcade? All confused, angry, bewildered. Billy just was being protective the way his practically non-existent emotional intellect allowed him. Probably he knew there would be a shitstorm coming if Neil found out. I don’t think young girls are allowed bfs in his household. That’s the vibe I got there, fellas.

Why is Billy so lonely though? Just look at that guy, he’s got everything: the face, the ass, the style, the charm, the smile, the wit. He’s unapologetically confident and knows how to get what he wants, so being alone and not making any friends seems to be a choice of his own. Mainly because he’s super pissed about everything. I mean he really has no chill when it comes to emotions, they control him. Moreover, he doesn’t plan on staying longer than is absolutely necessary, so why try. As for a gf, he’s not that into girls, which could be for several reason (my hc is him being gay, no surprises here lol). I think he’s actually a virgin. We see him with a girl once, he didn’t seem nice or caring or at least a little bit amused, so probably that was out of sheer bore. Nothing to do other than date or keg-drink in a small town, huh, Billy boy? Third, and don’t hit me yet, he’s kind of a nerd himself. And here I have to say thanks to a very devoted lady who brought to my attention two details about Billy’s room one of them being a poster for the first Metallica album which only few ppl liked as much (nerds!), and another one being James Thurber’s autobiography Billy had on his table. How’s that for your typical basketball bully Cali boy reading? Nerd! So he’s a bit too picky about all this friends and connections thing. Also I’d like to point out that Max actually found her a whole party of friends, I think that could make Billy kinda jelous? Before that it felt they were in the same boat, sort of a team? In the first scene they appeared I honestly thought they were this cool bro-sis pair fully armed to take on Hawkins ready or not.

So. I feel for my boy. He’s just a lonely kid with daddy issues and zero anger control.

To be continued, cuz there’s also my precious mama teddy bear Steve.

#harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #character study #i’m bad at this #fandom analytics because i can’t write fics

[fan-clan-fun]

Warriors Pantheon

I've noticed different people discussing pantheon and how they could work in the Warriors universe, and although I don't have any clans that would use the model (yet) I do so enjoy coming up with possibilities, so here are a few deities that could maybe be found in a clan lore, depending on how you built their culture. Feel free to use them in your own works or maybe see if they help flesh out your own ideas. If you do use them, even as a basis, let me know! I'd love to see them in action.

Also their names are all combinations of sounds or gestures/body language I have observed in my own cats.

Rrema ( Pronounced as a throaty purring R then abruptly opening the mouth into the -ma sound)

- Name meaning Truthspeaker or Oath.

- Embodies ideals of loyalty, honesty, and truth. Basically connected to the ideals within the Warrior Code. Can also be interpreted as a deity of law and justice.

- Can be a patron deity to all warriors, but if the clan has them, could also be a patron to clan Code keepers or law keepers.

- Possible world building implications include: clans which value honesty and consider lies to be horrible things (which lead to them being very indirect in some cases but their word when given is highly trusted); Rrema being invoked whenever an oath is given particularly when an apprentice becomes a warrior or when a medicine cat apprentice becomes a full medicine cat; Rrema’s name becoming slang for truth or oath and calling some cat as like Rrema is a great honor.

- The deity could have potentially been the one to suggest or give the code to the clans, or have been a hero from clan histories who helped establish the code and was known for their honor and good word.

Kakakakra (Pronounced with those clicking sounds cats make when hunting, three in a row, with the last fading into a softer -ra sound. Often accompanied by pulling the lips slightly back from the fangs.)

- Name meaning roughly the Thrill, or Thrillseeker

- The deity of hunting, specifically of the thrill of the hunt, of finding, seeking, and succeeding.

- Patron deity of hunters, but also invoked in situations of competition in hopes of gaining an edge.

-Some world building possibilities: A clan where hunting isn't simply a chore, but the most exciting thing cats do, after all it is in a acts nature to hunt to seek food sometimes even when they are not hungry; apprentices who are daredevils, challenging each other to do dangerous things and seeking the thrill in new and exciting ways; when a hunt goes particularly well or when a cat wins some form of competition, they might leave an offering of some kind to the deity.

- This deity is likely a free spirit, who sees challenge and excitement and is immediately drawn to it, if they came from clan histories, they could have been a non clan born cat or an apprentice who went beyond the boundaries of current clan understanding and sought new innovative ways to hunt, any kind of way to get the excitement and success they needed.

Mehr (pronounced as a loud and insistent drawn out Meh sound, with the -r sound coming from closing the mouth)

-Meaning Mother or Helper

-Deity of kit rearers and caretakers, this deity is associated with suckling kits, raising them, educating them, and all the joys and struggles it involves. The deity is seen as a tough but patient and ultimately loving deity.

-Patron deity of nursing cats and caretakers who raise kits. Unlike most other deities this one is usually portrayed as female, due to the nature of most cats who give birth being female, but it does not focus on those aspects being solely female character traits.

- Most clans separate fertility from kit birth, as it is fairly easy to get pregnant, they consider it a true achievement when all kits survive to adulthood. A mother who manages this is said to have had Mehr intercede for her, that she is in Mehr’s favor. Mehr is invoked during times of birth and times when a mother may be struggling with her kits, sometimes this can be done in exasperation when a mother becomes frustrated, but others it is with true pain and conviction hoping that Mehr will grant health and wellness to her kits. Clans who worship Mehr with more dedication often view their queens and caretakers with great respect, and consider the decision to devote their lives to kits to be a selfless one, any cat who raises a litter of kits is respected and deferred to. In some clans raising a litter of kits is considered equal to mentoring an apprentice, and qualifies them for being chosen as deputy.

-There are two different schools of belief on where Mehr’s name originated. The more practical believe that the name was given to the deity after the sounds which kits make to call their mothers, which are usually very similar. The more religious believe that Mehr instilled in every kit before birth the ability to call her name before any other, so that she might come to them and care for them.

- Mehr is a likely candidate to be the top of a pantheon if so chosen, due to the absolute importance of mothers in any culture, and the ability to extend that in some form to encompass mother nature.

Marrrow (Pronounced with a soft Mah going into a trilling R and ending with a higher pitched ow sound as if asking a question. Often accompanied by a slight tilt of the head.)

-Name meaning Knowledgeseeker and practically translating to Question.

-Deity of learning, knowledge, and curiosity.

-Patron deity of apprentices and their mentors, of those seeking knowledge or the very wise and learned, which means elders are regarded as blessed by Marrrow.

-Marrrow is the main deity whom apprentices revere, they are often asking for wisdom and knowledge, and any apprentice hoping to get a specific suffix is encouraged to seek Marrrow’s favor by showing dedication and perseverence. A clan who includes Marrrow in their pantheon is likely to consider apprenticeship not as just a stepping stone to warriorhood, but as a separate and distinct part of life, a time of learning, of exploring, of gaining new things. Often young warriors are nostalgic for apprentice days, and warriors compete for mentorship of apprentices, because being a mentor is a privilege and honor. Since Marrrow’s name almost translates to question, his name is used often by apprentices who ask their mentors questions or just seek knowledge and wisdom from the elders. Elders who have survived for so long are considered blessed by Marrrow on their search for knowledge, and emulated in hopes of finding favor in Marrrow and being granted a longer life.

-This deity likely came about from the cats innate curiosity and need to hunt and explore. If the pantheon comes from ordinary cats, likely this could have been an outsider who joined the clan, and made it their goal to learn everything about clan life and subsequently became a wise and respected elder amongst all the clans.

Raul (almost like growl, except without the g, and more drawn out, like a nervous cat about to start yowling. Usually accompanied by unsheathed claws)

-Name meaning Baredclaw or Protector.

-Deity of battle, of protection, of duty.

-Patron deity of warriors, specifically -claw and -fang fighters who dedicated themselves to Raul, but also of all the brave souls and heroes in the clan who have given their lives in fighting and protecting the clan, even if it didn't always include drawing blood with claws.

- In clans where Raul is worshipped, apprentices make a choice from early on to pursue being a -claw or -fang, some clans might even have a few special classes which they teach only to -claws. Of course all cats are taught how to fight and protect, but for Raul’s followers, it is their duty and purpose, their specialty. In some clans it is believed that those who are chosen by Raul after death as the greatest warriors become the protectors of Starclan themselves, defending the borders of the stars from the spirits of traitors and murderers. However Raul is also said to care for all heroes. One clan may have a myth of a young apprentice, honored by Raul for sacrificing his life by running messages to warn his clan and help the battle until his very heart gave out. Or a warrior protecting an apprentice who took a bite which got infected. Or a young medicine cat, who during an epidemic continued to care for their clan mates until they succumbed to the sickness themselves. Raul is the hero, the honorable, the dutiful, the protector of the weak. But at same time, followers of Raul seek out danger, trying to prove themselves as worthy. Raul’s name is called out in battle, called out when a cat feels wronged, in challenge of another's honor.

-This deity was likely created out of some form of hero archetype, the greatest hero of clan legend. Either someone defending the borders or maybe a queen defending her kits, something which involved going up against great odds and sacrificing themselves.

Ehrrrrum (pronounced by opening mouth and making an eh sound, and then beginning to purr while closing the mouth)

-Meaning healer or Peacegiver.

-Deity of healing, peace, spirituality.

-Patron to medicine cats and -cloud cats, who live lives with the intention of bringing healing to others or cultivating inner and outer peace within themselves and the clan.

-Can work with clans who have medicine cats with healing herbs, or simply spiritual leaders. The idea is that a healer strives to bring a cats body back to health and balance, just as a spiritual leader or counselor would seek to restore balance to a cats life in their attitudes and actions. Cats who follow Ehrrum are usually considered good cats to discuss issues with, and are considered wise beyond their seasons for their introspection and their attentiveness to others. Ehrrum is usually the deity called to watch during mediation between clans to solve disputes, or between clanmates who feel that they have been wronged.

- Ehrrum likely originated with the first understanding of spirituality, and would have been a founding element to whatever conference decided the warrior code, but primarily they are likely involved with Starclan and their religious aspects. If the pantheon was made from real cats, perhaps the first leader to put aside their differences and seek to negotiate instead of fight, or the first healer or seer from the clans.

-As a note, Raul and Ehrrum are seen as opposites, two sides of a coin, and there is said to be conflict between them and their followers and ideals.

While those are only a few options, they seem to fit a fairly coherent whole for the warriors society. But with light there is usually dark, so perhaps a few deities as counterpoints to those above.

Hissao (pronounced with a sibilant hiss and a short clipped yowl)

-Meaning Betrayer, also known as Trust breaker.

- For clans where the code is sacred, where Rrema is important, Hissao would be a good antagonist. They are a deity which personifies betrayal of ideals, of the code, of trust and honor. Possibly, if one would want to utilize some form of dark forest, Hissao would collect all those of the clans who had been exiled, or killed, or been stripped of their name and rank. Those cats would become Hissaos to do their will and bidding, stripped of all free will. Should the clans worship Raul as well, this could lead to a narrative where the heroes if the vans were forever protecting Starclan from Hissaos agents.

-It is said that Hissao roams the living lands, tempting cats with the things they most desire, but in return they must give their souls to him.

Mahss (Pronounced with a harsh mah which falls into a sharp hiss)

-World breaker or basically death.

-It's debatable whether this deity could be considered evil or neutral. In a way it simply exists. It is essentially the deity of entropy, chaos, disaster. Because of it fires, floods, storms, sickness, death occur. Some of the clans believe it spreads this willingly, intentionally, others believe it is simply a keeper of balance, that for every bit of life a bit if death must also exist. They speak of it in frightened whispers, their hisses, much like against Hissao speak of fear and anger towards it. This deity is essentially a counterpoint to Mehr, where they nurture, grow, support, protect, Mahss brings about death, destruction, anguish.

Anyway, that's all I have at the moment, I'm sure there us more I could do, but this seems like a decent support for canon warriors culture, what little of it exists, in the importance of different roles and skills in the clans.

#warriorsworldbuilding #warriorcats #warriorscats

[viadescioism]

The arskasa ona language of the ravens of antimony, and the basic dictionary

The alphabet of desire known as the Ravens of antimony can also be written, and spoken using its own syntax, and grammar. It's language is primarily based off english and is primarily used by me The Wolf of antimony to obscure information from people I do not want to know it. It is also used as a magickal language in my rituals, and spells as something that can connect me more in my craft when I am partaking in it. This language is made up of the 36 sounds of the ravens of antimony alphabet of desire. These sounds are connected together along with the meanings of the sounds to form words. This means that you can take the ravens of antimony's word for raven which is arskasa, and are able to split it down in its letters to gain its basic meaning. In the case of arskasa it would come down to AR - SKA - SA. AR meaning wise, SKA meaning life, and SA meaning dark, so the word for Raven technically comes out to in its base meaning wise life dark. Arskasa is a word that is also made up of a another word. This word being arska meaning animal. Also each letter is its own syllable and will be spoken as such. The Ravens of antimony language is written, and spoken in subject-verb-object sentence structure, just like English.

LUST (E) | [eh] as the “e” in “met.”

PASSION (U) | [oo] as the “oo” in “boot.”

DEVOTION (Æ)(A') | [Ay] as the "ay" in "May"

PREJUDICE (TA) | [Tah]

ANGER (HA) | [Hah]

MISUNDERSTANDING (RA) | [Rah]

SKILL (A) | [Ah] as the “a” in “father.”

MIGHT (I) | [Ee] as the “ee” in “meet.”

ASCENDANCY (O) | [Oh] as the “o” in “boat.”

CHAOS (KA) | [Kah]

PANIC (ȜA) (Gha)| [Ghah]

HORROR (þA) (Tha) | [Thah]

DARK (SA) | [Sah]

CONNECTION (LA) | [Lah]

LIGHT (MA) | [Mah]

WISDOM (AR) | [Ar] as the “ar” in “car.”

KNOWLEDGE (JA) | [Jah]

LOGIC (NA) | [Nah]

BINDING (BA) | [Bah]

WARDING (GA) | [Gah]

PROTECTION (CA) | [Cah]

INSANITY (ZA) | [Zah]

ILLUSION (QA) | [Qah]

FANTASY (FA) | [Fah]

ENERGY (KNA) | [Knah]

LIFE (SKA) | [Skah]

HEALTH (SHA) | [Shah]

CORRUPTION (ACK) | [Ack]

DEATH (ABT) | [Abt]

BANISHMENT (ARD) | [Ard] as the “ard” in “card”

PAIN (PA) | [Pah]

EXPERIENCE (DA) | [Dah]

ENLIGHTENMENT (XA) | [Ksah]

UNKNOWN (YA) | [Yah]

RELEASE (VA) |  [Vah]

REBIRTH (WA) | [Wah]

The two configurations:

Projective, yang, masculine, Damakna = Dama

Resistant, yin, feminine, Dasakna = Dasa

The five states of the Ravens of antimony language:

Intention of hostility, aggression, and power = Uknaoxava

Intention of love, calm, and emotions = Shaknaoxava

Intention of logic, good communication, and inspiration = Naknaoxava

Intention of groundedness, sternness, and nurturing = Daknaoxava

Intention of great spiritual understanding, religious zeal, and divine unity = Skaknaoxava

modifying words:

plural  = "Ona" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

used like the -ing  = "Vada" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

possession ('s) =  "Iba" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

Past tense = "Jaskadala" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

Present tense = "Daskadala" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

Future tense = "Yaskadala" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

prefix of er = "Owa" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

prefix of est = "Oxa" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

prefix that increases the power and energy of the word it is connected to used like the word "very" = "Aiokna" as its own separate word after the word it is modifying

weakening of meaning, and sort of representing = "Acki"

Indicates a question = "Oya"

to release the energy of the sentence = "Ovakna"

word that modifies the word before to make it a number = "Onakna"

modifying word that changes nouns to the opposite = "Opawa"

modifying word that changes nouns to the cute form ="Oshasha"

modifying word that changes nouns to adjective or adverb form = "Oqaja"

word that releases energy at the end of a statements = Oxajava

Honorifics:

Lord, boss, Authority = Omabala

worker, peasant, underling = Osabala

Master, teacher = Vaarla

God, enlightened Being, ascended master = Yamasala

Student = Xajala

Non-binary sir = Dalala

Noun:

Genesis = Oxakna

Theós = Damakna

Theá = Dasakna

Ouranios Ethos = Madaqa

Agora Ethos = Ladaqa

Chthonic Ethos = Sadaqa

Andros = Uknayamasa

Sophizo = Shaknayamasa

Iaomai = Naknayamasa

Pharmakeia = Daknayamasa

Apotheosis = Xaoxa

Philosophia = Najaar

Eudaimonia = Umao

Philotimon = A'jau

Isoropia = Laarda

Sophrosyne = Tau

Eleutheria = Vadaska

Humility = Davaabt

Agapi = Xa'ua'

Stoicism = Abtgha

"Name for the dot that makes space in between words." = Arlaar

"Name for colon that acts as a period at the end of a sentence." = Laabt

"Name for question mark." = Layaja

"Name for exclamation mark." = Laola

Force field, and protective energy = Cakna

Ravens of antimony aspects = Okna

Ravens of antimony  Sub aspects = Akna

Antimony = Xadakna

Sun = Ouknadakna

Moon = Oshaknadakna

Name = Skadaja

Help = Wadama

Abundance = Maoo

Alligator = Arskasasa

Ant = Arskakapa

Dear = Arskaiu

Badger = Arskaha

Bee = Arskaa

Camel = Arskahama

Cat = Arskaga

Cheetah = Arskahaa

Chicken = Arskabaskaka

Cow = Arskaba

Crocodile = Arskamama

Deer = Arskaa'

Dog = Arskau

Dolphin = Arskaosha

Duck = Arskavasha

Eagle = Arskavava

Elephant = Arskaua'

Fly = Arskaabt

Fox = Arskaaka

Frog = Arskaza

Giraffe = Arskao

Goat = Arskabada

Goldfish = Arskabasha

Hamster = Arska

Hippopotamus = Arskauu

Horse = Arskababaska

Human = Arskapadaxa

kangaroo = Arskakaka

Lion = Arskauma

Lobster = Arskashaca

Monkey = Arskapadaxaqa

Octopus = Arskana

Owl = Arskaar

Panda = Arskara

Pig = Arskabaska

Rabbit = Arskae

Rat = Arskanana

Raven = Arskasa

Scorpion = Arskakapaha

Seal = Arskaskasha

Shark =  Arskashai

Sheep = Arskaska

Snail = Arskaca

Snake = Arskagha

Spider = Arskatha

Squirrel = Arska

Siger =  Arskai

Turtle = Arskacaca

Wolf = Arskama

Zebra =  Arskasalama

Yes = Mava

No = Sava

Hello = Labadaska

Goodbye = Dava

Good morning = Tamama

Good afternoon = Tamala

Good evening = Tamasa

Welcome = Mabava

Good = Tama

Evil = Tasa

Time = Qadanakna

Magick = Knaxaja

Magic = Faknaxaja

Language = Laja

Person = Arskaxa

Animal = Arska

Raven = Arskasa

Sigil = Laqa

Text = Laqalaja

Book = Jalaqalaja

Box = Skaqaba

Lesson = Java

Element = Ushanadaskakna

Fire = Ukna

Water = Shakna

Air = Nakna

Earth = Dakna

Spirit = Skakna

Space = Skaknaya

Void =  Skaknayaack

Symbol = Daknalaqa

Mind = Skaskaarkna

Body = Skaskadakna

Individual = Skaska

Door = Daknaga

Doors = Daknagao

Building = Daknabagaca

Reincarnation = Abtwa

Action = Vada

Terrestrial body = Odakna

Planet = Odakna

Number = Nakna

Library = Jalaqalajadaknabagaca

Sense = lada

Past = Jaskada

Present, Now, Here = Daskada

Future = Yaskada

Abomination = Sakaackyatha

Place = Daskada

Like = Mala

Secret = Naya

Next = Wava

Want = Ba'

Information = Naja

Release = Va

Focus = Taa'

God = Masa

Goddess = Sama

Deity = Yamasa

Northwest = Xaa'skaknaya

North = Xaskaknaya

Northeast  Xaoskaknaya

East = Oskaknaya

Southeast = Yaoskaknaya

South = Yaskaknaya

Southwest  = Yaa'skaknaya

West = A'skaknaya

Day = mama

Night = Sasa

Sunday =  Skamama

Monday = Knamama

Tuesday = Imama

Wednesday = Namama

Thursday = Omama

Friday = Umama

Saturday = Amama

Spring = Shaqadanakna

Summer = Skaqadanakna

Autumn = Ardqadanakna

Winter = Abtqadanakna

January, January moon = Wasaodakna

February, February moon = Usaodakna

March, March  moon = Knasaodakna

April, April moon = Shasaodakna

May, May moon = Skasaodakna

June, June moon = Dasaodakna

July, July moon = Vasaodakna

August, August moon = Isaodakna

September, September moon = Arsaodakna

October, October moon = Thasaodakna

November, November moon = Ardsaodakna

December, December moon = Abtsaodakna

Month = Saodakna

Lust = E

Passion = U

Devotion = A'

Prejudice =Ta

Anger = Ha

Skill = A

Might = I

Ascendancy = O

Chaos = Ka

Panic = Gha

Horror = Tha

Dark, Darkness = Sa

Connection = La

Light = Ma

Wisdom = Ar

Knowledge = Ja

Logic = Na

Binding = Ba

Protection = Ca

Insanity = Za

Illusion = Qa

Fantasy = Fa

energy = Kna

Life = Ska

Spiritual life =  Padaxa

Health = Sha

Corruption = Ack

Death = Abt

Spiritual death = Yavawa

Banishment = Ard

Pain = Pa

Experience = Da

Enlightenment = Xa

Unknown = Ya

Rebirth = wa

Love = Eua'

Hate = Tahara

Power = Aio

Fear = Kaghatha

Spirituality = Salama

Reason = Arjana

Safety = Bagaca

Delusion = Zaqafa

Creation = Knaskasha

Destruction = Ackabtard

Magick = Knaxaja

Magic = Faknaxaja

Luck = Yama

Toilet = Ackshakna

Abyss = Saoo

Male = Damaska

Female = Dasaska

Nonbinary = Dalaska

Help = Wadama

great spiritual awe and a connection to all things past present and future = Dasalamaxa

Maybe = Mavalasava

Aman, showing of great honor and reverence, at the end of communication, thanks and respect for = skaar

You're welcome =  Vawadama

Good morning = Malabadaska

Good afternoon = Lalabadaska

Good evening = Salabadaska

Goodnight = Sasalabadaska

Excuse me = Vaskada

Verb:

Bind = Ba

Ward = Ga

Hate = Tahara

Fear = Kaghatha

Love = Eua'

Experience = Da

Pain = Pa

Panic = gha

Anger = Ha

Misunderstand = Ra

Lust = E

Focus = Taa'

Come = Bavadaskada

Luck = Yama

Help = Wadama

Name = Skadaja

Thank, Thank you, You're welcome = Vawadama

Get = Baba

Give = Vaba

Go = Vadaskada

Understand = Mara

Keep = Labaca

Let, Allow = A'da

Make = Naknaskasha

Put = A'ba

Seem = Tana

Take = Bava

Speak = Vakna

Be, Is, Are, Am, Are = Dada

Do, Does = Tada

Have, Has = Laba

Say = Naqada

See = Qada

Send = Lavava

May = A'ii

Will = Ida

Experience = Da

Time = Qadanakna

Welcome = Mabava

Power = Aio

Sense = Lada

Number = Nakna

Build = Daknabagaca

Can = Mava

listen = Arknalada

Open = Vaca

share = Vadalada

Learn = Xaja

Mean = Knaja

Like = Mala

Want = Bae

Release = Va

Hold = Bada

Teach = Vaar

shine, shines, emanate, emit, summon, illuminate = Mavava

Activate, start = Navama

Deactivate, stop = Navasa

Adjective, and Adverb:

On = Xama

Off = Xasa

Under = Vasa

Up, Above = Mao

Center, Middle = Lao

Down, Below = Sao

Not = Sara

First = Taa'

Afraid = ghada

Good = Tama

Evil, Bad = Tasa

Individual = Skaska

Sorry = Wama

Open = Vaca

Mean = Knaja

Safe = Bagaca

Past = Jaskada

Present = Daskada

Future = Yaskada

Secret = Naya

Next = Wava

Unknown = Ya

Old = Saqadanakna

New = Maqadanakna

Trick = Aqa

Over = Vama

Through = Vala

Not = Sara

Then = Dayao

Please = Mau

Next = Wava

wild = Uknaza

Conjunction:

And = Lala

Or = Fafa

nor = Thatha

For = Vava

But = Ghagha

Preposition:

About = Jaa'

Across = Dalada

After = Daa'

Against = Sahama

Among = Badaskada

At = Ladaskada

Before = A'da

Between = Saa'ma

By = Daba

Up = Mao

Down = Sao

From = Bada

In = Knaca

Out = Knacava

Off = Xasa

On = Xama

Over = Vama

Through = Vala

Under = Vasa

To = Lava

With = Bala

As = Lada

For = Vava

Of = Labada

Above = Dao

Like = Mala

Next = Wava

Pronoun:

Subject Pronoun/ Object Pronoun:

I, Me = Skada

You = Daska

It, That, This = Daya

Nonbinary pronoun/ Object pronouns = Dala

We, Us = Skada Ona

They, Them = Daska Ona

These, Those = Daya Ona

Reflexive or Intensive Pronouns "repeating word":

Myself = Skadaskada

Yourself = Daskadaska

Itself = DayaDaya

Nonbinary pronoun reflexive pronouns = Daladala

Ourselves = Skadaskada Ona

Yourselves = Daskadaska Ona

Themselves = Dayadaya Ona

Possessive Pronouns = "iba":

My, Mine = Skada Iba

Your, yours = Daska Iba

Nonbinary pronoun Possessive pronouns = Dala Iba

Its = Daya Iba

Our, ours = Skada Ona Iba

Their, Theirs = Daska Ona Iba

Not sure:

Where = Yadaskada

When = Yadaskada

Why = Yaya

What = Yaja

Who = Yadaya

How =  Knacayaja

#magick #magic #witch #witchblr #sigil magic #sigil magick #sigil #raven #the ravens of antimony

[small-time-village]

If Donnel Doesn’t Join - AU

Donnel joins Chrom’s army because his performance against Roddick’s bandits assures him that he can grow stronger and make a difference. However, if he does poorly in this fight, he rejects the offer to join the Shepherds.

Donnel is mortally wounded in the fight against Roddick’s bandits. Lissa is able to save his life, but the injury is such that it would take months to recover, time that the Shepherds do not have to wait for the farmer. With words of comfort, Chrom’s Shepherds leave Donnel behind. In the scramble to save Donnel’s life, Roddick escapes justice once again, leaving his lackeys behind to die.

Donnel is utterly miserable after the fact. He feels he could have done better, and maybe even impress the Exalt enough to have been given a position in the army. When he recovers, he devotes his free time to teaching himself the ways of the lance, attacking haybales and trees with wooden spears he whittles himself. He even gathers a few like-minded friends to train with him, creating a tiny village militia.

It is a few years later when Roddick makes his return once more. With the Shepherds across the sea in Valm, the heartland is vulnerable once more, and Roddick this time has come with revenge on his mind. Leading a band of vile thieves and murderers, he comes to Donnel’s village intent on killing every man, woman, and child that lives there.

Donnel is ready this time. When one of his militiamen rings a chapel bell to warn of the bandit attack, Donnel organizes his friends and arms them all with homemade spears and bows. The weapons are of poor quality, and the militia is unarmored, but they’d trained for years for an event like this to happen again.

The bandits are shocked to find their main way into the village suddenly interrupted by a raging wall of burning oil. They are directed to go around the fire, but this is exactly what the villagers want. Arrows rain from two archers on the rooftops as the bandits try and get between buildings, pinning the murderers down. Three other villagers, led by Donnel himself, take up their spears and attack the bandits brave enough to charge into the arrow fire, slaying the men one by one.

Roddick is more surprised than anyone to find the village actually defending itself this time. However, he has come here with hatred and revenge on his mind, and nothing would stop him from carrying out his mission. He rallies his minions and orders a full-scale charge, to overwhelm the tiny militia by sheer numbers.

At first, the plan seems to go poorly, as might be expected from a bull-headed charge into a defended position. More bandits fall to arrows and spears, and for about two minutes Donnel and his friends seem to hold the line. This ends, though, when Roddick himself manages to hurl hand axes upward with deadly accuracy, slaying both of the archers on the roofs and removing the villagers’ covering fire.

When this happens, all hell breaks loose. Donnel orders a retreat back to the chapel, where the unarmed villagers have taken refuge within stone walls. Roddick is giddy, and does not prevent their retreat. As the four militiamen fall back to the chapel, Roddick orders his men to put the rest of the village to the torch. Before slamming shut the doors to the chapel, the last thing Donnel sees is wooden homes going up in flames.

A siege begins. For days, the entire village huddles inside the chapel, mourning their losses. Barricades are erected around every door, and Donnel and his friends set to maintaining weapons and supplies. Outside, the bandits set up camp in the smoldering ruins of the village. Donnel counts a total of twelve surviving bandits from the attack - outnumbering his own forces three-to-one. While the bandits feast on food looted from homes before they were razed, the villagers are forced to subsist on the meager supplies that the militia had set up in the chapel.

On the fourth day, Roddick has become bored of such siege tactics. He makes a loud challenge to those inside the chapel: he will engage one villager in combat to the death. The reward for victory is an end to the siege and the disbandment of his troops. The offer sounds too good to be true, but everyone inside knows well that they cannot survive in the chapel much longer, nor can they defeat Roddick’s men in a full-scale battle.

Donnel volunteers, after much deliberation. His mother, horrified, begs him not to fight the same man who had slain his father, but Donnel has already made up his mind. He goes to the altar and prays to Naga for strength, and then removes a floorboard. Out of the floor, he draws a long steel lance, a weapon whose composition is far better than any the militia had been using before.

“This was mah Pa’s lance once. I kept it hidden. I was thinking of sellin’ it once, but I’m glad ah never did. I’m gonna use it to avenge him. Just you watch, Ma.”

Roddick is overjoyed to see the young man walking out of the chapel, lance in hand and a tin pot helmet on his head. He doesn’t recognize Donnel at first, but he laughs uproariously when it dawns on him.

“If it ain’t the axe-fodder! I killed your old man, you know! My men just ‘bout killed you, too! You’re the challenger? Good! Good! I’m going to want to see the look on your ma’s face when I throw her your head!”

“Mah name is Donnel! This is mah village! We’ve had about enough of you and your folks ruinin’ our lives! It ends today, Roddick! I’m gonna make my face the last thing you see!”

Roddick takes a pair of hand axes from a nearby tree stump. Donnel grips his lance in both hands, the steel as sharp as his glare. Roddick circles around the farmboy, a manic grin on his face as he plots the death of the young man. His very first move is to throw one of the axes, hoping to end the fight quickly, and he is surprised when Donnel manages to deflect the axe with his spear’s haft, not so much as a scratch on the farmer’s arm.

Roddick’s grin turns to an angry frown, and he charges. This is exactly what Donnel wants. The battle ends almost as quickly as it began. With a single swift move, Donnel brings his lance back and then jams it forward. Roddick’s eyes go wide when he feels metal through his armor. Blood seeps into his coat, as he looks down. Donnel has impaled him, directly through the heart. His second axe falls to the ground, and Donnel pulls the lance back out, spraying blood across the ground.

“Hah... axe... fodder... Boy... you’re... just like... your old man...”

“No. Mah Pa never finished the job, and ah will. Any last words, Roddick?”

“See you... in the... pit.”

Donnel delivers a killing blow, impaling Roddick once more. He pulls his lance through Roddick’s back and stares down the remaining bandits. They appear confused, unsure of what to do with their leader dead. Though Donnel expects them to attack, they all grumble and begin to leave, their one unifying presence dead upon the ground and nothing of interest remaining in the village. They take what spoils each one can carry, and leave the ruined village behind.

Donnel becomes a local hero. It takes months for homes to be rebuilt, but there is little doubt that the lancer saved the village. He puts down his spear after the death of Roddick, confident that his home is safe now, and he later marries and has children.

He never needed to become a Shepherd. He just needed to protect what was important to him.

#au #this got REALLY long #it was not my intention #but I had to see this story through #drabble #donnel