#Nita Ayyshu

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 5

Master List | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

A/N: As always, thank you to my absolutely wonderful beta-reader @teletraan-meets-jarvis for giving this chapter a read for me (and for being a perpetually willing person to bounce ideas off of. I APPRECIATE YOU, TJ!)

Chapter Rating: T

Warnings: language, canon-typical violence

Word Count: 6.2k words

Sorgan was not at all the green, sunny paradise from Chuckles’s dream. At least not initially.

“ARNI! MAKE SURE NITA’S STRAPPED IN AND THEN GET YOUR CHEEKS IN THIS SEAT!” Chuckles shouted as his knuckles turned white around the freighter’s steering yoke. The ship rocked in Sorgan’s stormy atmosphere, the winds seemingly buffeting the ship from every angle. Chuck swore under his breath as his eyes flicked over to the guidance display, trying to find a more favorable place to bring the ship down through the storm. Lightning flashed outside the port window, and he felt himself flinch involuntarily at the instantaneous crack of thunder that followed. His clenched teeth creaked and his hands clenched the controls slightly tighter as Arni practically dove into the co-pilot seat next to him, yanking the flight harness over their shoulders. Nita squealed as another massive bolt of lightning ripped across the column of clouds in front of them. 

“What do we do when we’re scared honey?” Chuckles asked over his shoulder. “You got my bucket?” 

“Yeah.” Nita’s voice quaked, but Chuckles tossed a quick glance backwards and smirked as Nita’s honey gold eyes disappeared under his helmet. Her voice continued to shake as she began to sing. 

“I’ve been to many moons and all the stars in the sky…”

Chuck grinned at the familiar song. I really need to teach her some more songs. Bet Arni knows a few. The kid’s a walking archive. 

Arni swallowed hard, and he felt them look at him for direction. “See if you can find us a hole in this storm to drop in and a flat place to land,” he instructed under his breath. “A clearing or forest edge would be preferable so we can maybe shield the ship under a tree or something.” 

The young Twi’lek nodded, swiveling the guidance display to face them before furrowing their eyebrows in concentration. “Looks like the clouds thin out about thirty degrees east of your current heading.” 

“Swinging thirty east,” Chuck confirmed, tilting the steering column. “Dropping to 2000 meters altitude.” 

“There’s a clearing three klicks north. Should be able to land there.” 

Chuck nodded, easing the ship lower. Rain began to slap loudly against the hull of the ship as he dropped below the cloud cover, and the wind picked up, rocking the ship back and forth even more violently. The emerald tree tops of Sorgan’s forests seemed to reach up through the mist and fog like spindly fingers as Chuckles continued to ease the ship down, his eyes scanning for the gap in the trees Arni had mentioned.

“You sure it was three klicks, kid? I feel like we should see it by now.”

Arni squinted at the nav display a little harder, punching a few buttons. “Yeah, should be dead ahead, about a quarter click I think.” They glanced over the top of the display, their eyes scanning the ground below before they extended a long, thin blue arm and pointed. “Maybe in that gap where it’s just fog and no treetops are poking through.” 

Chuckles followed the line their finger indicated, spotting the gap in the treetops. “Alright, bringing her down. We’ll try to park under the far edge under the trees there.” The ship dropped down into the fog with a low rumble. Suddenly, there was a sickening metallic squeal and the entire freighter began to roll to the right. Branches ripped through the gloom, slamming into the front viewport. Nita screamed and Chuck swore, a sweat breaking out across his palms as he tried to keep the freighter upright. 

“ARNI, WHAT HAPPENED? I THOUGHT THIS WAS A CLEARING?”

The young Twi’lek’s eyes were wide, frantically flicking across the display. “I… I… I was-”

“HANG ON!” Chuck braced his heels against the floor as he pulled back on the steering mechanism, trying to regain some altitude. The ship’s engine roared, but on the starboard side, the normal roar was quieter, interrupted by a loud, irregular whirring and clattering. Tree limbs slammed against the transparisteel, leaves smearing across the wet surface and sticking. “We’re losing altitude and starboard engine’s out. We need to set her down. Now. Everyone brace!” Chuckles shouted. Arni’s eyes grew impossibly wider. 

“I’m sorry,” they whispered. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” 

Chuck’s eyes were focused on the altimeter. “100 meters… 50… 20… Here we go.” 

Kamino’s waves raced up towards his trainer as the ship plummeted downwards in an uncontrolled spin. His hands fumbled for the eject cable. He pulled. Something was wrong. He pulled again. The eject sequence started. But his cockpit viewport didn’t budge. The ejection charges under his seat ignited. His canopy was just beginning to open. His helmet wasn’t on all the way yet… 

The ship crashed into the ground, bouncing once and then skidding into a line of tree trunks. It rocked against the timber before slamming back down and coming to rest in the mud. Chuck tried to steady his breathing, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply before releasing the controls and the memory that had come rushing to the front of his mind. His fingers inadvertently drifted to touch the scar that tore across his cheek from one corner of his mouth. He exhaled sharply.   

Not your best landing. But definitely not your worst.  

Nita whimpered quietly. Chuckles’s eyes snapped back open. He ripped off his flight harness, turning to Arni and gripping their shoulders. Their cheeks were tear stained as Chuckles’s eyes roved over them, hands cupping their face and turning their head back and forth, inspecting them. “Are you hurt?” he asked quietly. 

“I’m sorry,” they repeated.

“Arni. Are you hurt?” 

Arni swallowed hard, shaking their head. “I don’t think so,” they rasped. 

“Wait here for a second.” Chuckles scrambled across the floor on unsteady legs to where Nita was strapped into her jumpseat. He knelt in front of her, carefully removing his helmet from her head and then the flight harness. Her silver hair was mussed and her lip was trembling. Her golden eyes were wide with fear. Chuckles looked her over carefully as well. 

No blood. There’s that at least.

“Are you more hurt or more scared, honey?” he asked quietly. 

A tear slid from Nita’s eye, tracing down her cheek. Chuckles cupped her face, brushing it away with his thumb. “Nita. Are you hurt? I need to know.”

She took a deep shuddering breath, her eyes darting over his shoulder to where Arni sat watching them with a look of horror on their face. “More scared,” she said, but Chuck didn’t miss the way she cradled her left arm to her chest slightly. Her eyes met his, almost pleading, and he understood. 

“Arni, can you see if you can get the hatch open?” he called over his shoulder.

“Is she-”

“She’s alright. Just a bit shook up. See what you can do about the hatch.”

Arni hesitated, watching them carefully for another moment before standing from their seat and limping towards the ship’s main door. 

“Your ankle-” Chuck started.

“It’s fine,” Arni cut him off. They punched the buttons to open the hatch, and the door shrieked in protest but slid upward. “Ramp’s not working though,” they murmured.

Chuckles watched them for a moment, but the look on their face made it clear pressing them about the ankle was the wrong move. He sighed. “Take the tool kit and see if you can find the problem.”

“Yes sir,” Arni said quietly. Chuckles knew they didn’t mean it maliciously, but the words cut him anyway. Before he could think of a response, the young Twi’lek had dragged the tool kit out the hatch and dropped down out of view. 

Chuckles sighed again. One step at a time. 

He turned back to Nita. “Alright, let me see your arm, honey.” 

“I didn’t want them to know,” Nita said softly. “They think it’s their fault.” 

“It wasn’t,” Chuckles said gently. “We’ll get them fixed up next. But right now, I need you to tell me how you got hurt.” He reached for her hand, and she flinched when he took her arm and carefully rolled up her sleeve. The little Pantoran sucked in a sharp breath as another tear leaked from her eye. 

“When the ship rolled over, I fell on it hard,” she said, her voice shaking. 

Chuckles cautiously ran his hands over her forearm, gently feeling for anything out of place and watching her reactions. Nita didn’t wince again until he got to her wrist, squeezing her eyes shut when he flexed the joint slightly.

“Can you make a fist for me?” he asked. Nita did her best, but it was clear the effort was hurting her. “Can you wave your hand up or down at all or rotate it?” Chuckles requested. The little Pantoran screwed up her face and tried, but whimpered when her wrist was moved at all. He rested his hand on her shoulder. “Alright, that’s ok. You don’t have to do any more.”

“Is it broken?” she asked fearfully. 

“It might be. We’ll keep an eye on it. Lucky for you, I’ve broken enough bones in my time to know how to splint a wrist,” he joked, standing and going to retrieve the medkit. “I was the main reason our twin medics got their names.” He clicked open the medkit and began digging around for the materials he needed. 

“What were their names?” Nita asked, wiping her nose. 

“Sticks and Stones,” Chuckles replied, grinning. “Because-”

“Sticks and stones may break your bones?” 

“Yeah. Exactly that.”

“But they were medics? They shouldn’t be breaking bones.”

Chuckles giggled lightly as he set out a bandage. “I was pretty reckless in my training days. The rest of my squad was too, but I was definitely the worst, always coming in with broken fingers or toes. Nothing too serious. A broken nose once, and a busted collar bone on one really bad fall. They got so sick of seeing me that they threatened to give me a real break if I didn’t stop being such a jack-... such an idiot.” He placed the splint against her wrist and she inhaled sharply. “I know, I know. I’m sorry. Just a sec.” Gingerly, Chuckles began wrapping the bandage around her arm. 

“What are they like?” Nita asked, digging her teeth into her lower lip while Chuckles wrapped. 

“Sticks is a bit of a stick in the mud, pun intended. He was always the most annoyed with me, scolding me and muttering while he fixed me up. Stones was…” His eyes flicked to the magenta star halfway down the back of his helmet as he remembered painting it. “He was brave. A bit reckless, like me. Always had the best jokes though. And a stash of candy hidden in the medbay. He and Sticks would bicker all the time, but they were best friends, even if they were very different. Stones was always the first one to run in and look for those that needed his help.” 

“Is he one of your stars?” she asked. Chuckles’s eyes met hers. “Arni told me what they mean,” she said quietly. With her uninjured hand, she reached over, brushing her palm across the scuffed symbols painted on plastoid. “That’s a lot of stars.”

“It is. And they all burned brightly.” A lump unexpectedly rose in his throat.

“What happened to Stones?” Nita asked. 

“He and Sticks were deployed with our wing one mission. Normally they hung back at Coruscant, but not that time. Guess it was supposed to be a large campaign, so they figured having more medics on hand would be a good idea. We were sent out in our fighters while they stayed behind on our Venator to prepare for incoming wounded from the ground assault. Unfortunately, while the fighters were deployed, the Separatists attacked the fleet. They were almost defenseless until we could turn around and hustle back. Our Venator was hit pretty badly. Sticks was in the medbay, but Stones was going out to find wounded throughout the ship. There was one hallway going up in flames, and he was helping move wounded out of it. The hull had been weakened in the attack already, and unbeknownst to the troopers, a gas line had been hit. The gas was leaking into the hallway and finally floated to where the flames were, and that was all it took. The explosion breached the hull, and about a dozen of my brothers were killed instantly. The airlock was able to seal and keep the whole ship from going up, but Stones had just gone back in for more wounded a few seconds before the explosion happened.” Chuckles’s eyes burned, and he huffed out a laugh. “The supporting officer had told him it wasn’t safe, but he was stubborn. Apparently told the admiral if it wasn’t safe for him, then it was even less safe for his brothers that were hurt. He really gave him what for with a few choice words before ignoring orders and going back in. And that was that.” Chuck’s voice trailed off as he got lost in the memory. 

The way Sticks was standing in the hangar when we got back. We all knew.

“Stones was very brave,” Nita stated after a few moments. 

“Yup.” Chuckles’s voice cracked. “He was.” 

“Like you.” 

“Probably braver.” 

“You saved us when you didn’t have to.” 

Chuck paused, looking up at her. “Of course I did. There was no way I was going to leave you.” He finished wrapping her bandage. “I was trained to help people, to keep them safe at any cost, just like Stones. You and Arni needed help, so in that moment, there was never a doubt in my mind about what was going to happen next. We were all getting out together or we weren’t getting out at all.” He gently squeezed her fingertips. “Not too tight?” 

She shook her head. “No. It’s fine.” Nita raised her head and sniffled. “You should go find Arni.” 

Chuckles pushed himself to his feet. “Will you be alright in here?” 

Nita nodded. 

“Alright. I’ll be right back. Maybe take a look around and see if anything else looks too broken.” 

She nodded again, hopping out of her seat and carefully picking her way towards the back of the ship. Probably to grab some snacks first, Chuck thought as he picked up the medkit and headed for the hatch. 

The rain was still falling in heavy curtains outside, and the sound of droplets hitting the leaves in the trees overhead filled the air along with an inescapable damp chill. Chuck leaned against the hull for a moment, his eyes scanning the outside, searching for any sign of the young blue Twi’lek. 

“Arni!?” he called. 

No footprints in the mud. Where the kriff is that kid?

A shuffling sound underneath him caught his attention, and he noted a pair of muddy boots poking out from underneath the ship. Hopping out of the hatch, he crouched down and peered underneath. Arni had propped themself up against one of the tree roots the ship was balanced on and was working at a panel they’d pried open on the underside. They didn’t look at Chuck as he squatted down and shuffled under the ship next to them, dragging the medkit behind him. He noted Arni had their left leg propped up on part of the root and wasn’t really moving it. 

“You gonna let me work on that ankle?” he asked softly. 

“S’fine,” Arni muttered. 

“I saw you favoring it.”

“I said it’s fine.” 

Chuckles’s mouth dropped open a little bit at the frustrated tone in the youngling’s voice. The kid’s never had an attitude before. He watched Arni for a few more seconds, their brow furrowed and their tongue poking out as they worked at some component in the panel. Suddenly, a shower of sparks shot out, and the Twi’lek yelped, stuffing burned fingers into their mouth, but not before swearing loudly. 

“Dank FARRIK!” 

Chuck remained silent despite his shock at the curse. Arni’s eyes flicked up to him as they slipped their fingers out of their mouth to examine the burns on their fingertips before they heaved a frustrated sigh, leaning forward and hiding their face in their hands gingerly. Chuck carefully shuffled forward with the medkit before plopping in the mud next to Arni, his back resting against the tree root. Without a word, he reached over, taking Arni’s thin hand in his and turning it over. There was a cut on their index finger and a few bubbling blisters already beginning to rise on the pads of that finger and their middle one. Chuckles popped open the medkit and rooted around for bacta before carefully applying some to the burns, rubbing gently at the damaged skin. Arni was quiet, their head still hanging as Chuckles worked, bandaging the fingers gently before reaching over to their other hand and beginning the process over. 

“You know, it’s alright to make mistakes,” Chuckles said quietly after he’d applied bacta again. “We all do it. Me especially. It’s not the end of the galaxy.” 

Arni huffed. “I wrecked the ship.” 

“Actually, I wrecked the ship seeing as I was the pilot.” The burns weren’t as bad on this hand, so Chuck used only a little bacta before beginning to bandage. “You know what happened?” 

Arni nodded. “I had the scale off. I zoomed in on the display and I didn’t realize it had adjusted the scale as well. So it wasn’t measuring in klicks anymore. We missed the site I’d picked by half a klick.” 

Chuck glanced at them, smoothing the edge of the bandage down. “You learned something then about how the nav display works.” 

Arni swallowed hard before nodding again. 

“And are you going to make the same mistake again?”

“No, sir.” 

Chuckles sighed, releasing Arni’s hand and leaning over to nudge his shoulder against the youngling’s. “You know, I don’t like being called that.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry. You didn’t know. But I’m not your commanding officer, Arni. I’m not going to reprimand you. You’re a kid. You made a mistake, and all things considered, not a huge one. We’re all ok, the ship is fixable, and we’re where we wanted to be.” 

“I hurt Nita.” 

“Nita fell over on her arm and hurt it. If anything, I need to teach her how to not brace with her arms when she falls hard or else that won’t be her last broken wrist,” he joked. His mirth did little to quell Arni’s anxiety, their shoulders slouching more as they studied their newly bandaged fingers, flexing them experimentally. Chuckles huffed, leaning against Arni’s shoulder again. 

“I know I’m not who you thought you’d be stuck with, but I wasn’t kidding when we picked out that name. We’re a family now. And families take care of one another, even when they mess up. So, will you let me take care of that ankle while you take care of the ship?” 

Arni’s mouth twitched contemplatively for a few seconds before they finally relented, giving Chuckles a small nod. Chuck patted them on the shoulder before turning and wriggling down to where Arni had their ankle propped up. Carefully, he pulled it into his lap, ignoring the smear of mud it left on his pants. Arni didn’t make a sound, but he noted them digging their teeth into their lower lip as he slowly removed the boot they wore. 

“You put weight on it, so I don’t think it’s broken, but we’ll do our best to keep you off it for a bit to give it time to rest.” He took another bandage out of the medkit and began wrapping the ankle tight enough to keep it from flexing too easily. Arni worked in the panel, trying to keep their leg still. 

“You having any luck?” Chuckles asked after a few moments. 

“Not really. I think we may have damaged the main ramp circuit when we impacted. Cracked a few components. I can fix it. Just need the right parts.” 

Chuck gently slipped their boot back on, carefully refastening it. “Well, get me a list of what you need, and I’ll see if I can track it down.” He helped Arni out from under the ship, slipping an arm around their torso to help take some of the weight off their foot. The two of them tilted their heads up in the rain to look at what was left of the starboard engine. Arni sucked air in through their teeth and Chuckles resisted the urge to swear at the sight of the mangled engine that was nestled in the limbs of the tree next to them. It wasn’t on fire anymore, but smoke was still trickling from its scorched housing. 

“Well, good thing we’d planned on staying here for a while,” Chuckles observed. “But we can fix that.” 

One step at a time. 

—

The rain abated by early afternoon the following day, giving way to a moderate humidity accompanied by a cool breeze. Chuckles and the two younglings had managed to get the inside of the ship cleaned up from where items had come crashing loose during their landing. With Arni’s help, Chuck had identified a small settlement near them, and as soon as the rain stopped and the sky cleared, he pulled a covering over the lower half of his face along with a tinted pair of goggles and a hooded cloak and trudged into the town, leaving Arni and Nita behind to watch the ship. 

Arni had protested at first. “You can’t go alone. We’ve got to look out for each other.”

“And you will. You’ll look out for Nita here on the ship.”

“But-”

“Kid, you can barely walk. There’s not exactly a paved street out there waiting for you. Stay here, rest your ankle, and watch the little one.”

Arni’s face fell, and Chuckles rested his hands on their shoulders. “Hey,” he said softly. “This isn’t punishment. I don’t know what I’m going to find there, and I’d rather the two of you stay here in case things go bad or in case it’s dangerous.” 

“But what about you?” 

“I’ve got a blaster. I’ll be alright. You two just keep working on the ship, and I’ll be back in a few hours, alright?” 

Arni didn’t appear pleased, but hadn’t argued it further. 

Now, as Chuckles picked his way through the mud, he was progressively more glad he’d left the two of them behind. 

I’d have been carrying Nita by now. Her little feet would have slipped all over the place, and I’m barely able to keep my balance as is. Arni would have had an awful time with that ankle. 

His eyes flicked up to where the sun was starting to descend towards the horizon. 

Still. Better get a move on. 

A few klicks later, he heaved a sigh of relief when he finally saw a telltale plume of smoke coming from a small group of what appeared to be wooden, dome-shaped buildings. Following his nose, he picked out the one that appeared to be the common house and stepped inside. 

The day’s dwindling sunlight trickled in between the slats on the wall. He could see water dripping onto a few tables from where the rain had leaked through the cracks, pooling in certain places on the floor. There were a few patrons milling around: two humans huddled at one table, a Rodian and a Weequay playing some dice game at another, and a suspicious looking Klatooinian nursing a mostly empty bottle of spotchka in the corner, his eyes darting around but not really focusing on anything thanks to his alcohol-induced haze. Chuckles’s eyes settled on a woman running a rag over one of the tables, sweeping bowls into a stack to be carried off and cleaned. She wore a dark maroon tunic and grey trousers with a filthy apron covering her front. Her hair was a deep shade of black with the first few streaks of grey beginning to extend from her temples and one from her forehead, streaking back into a messy bun on the back of her head. A scar split her lower lip with a few more peppering her forearms. Her hands and forearms were strong, clearly used to a hard day’s labor. Everything about her presence gave Chuckles the impression she was the one in charge inside of this building. 

Here goes nothing. 

“‘Scuse me,” he said. 

The woman’s sharp amethyst eyes snapped up to look at him, raking over him quickly before settling on what little she could see of his face, seemingly piercing through the tinted goggles to peer into his soul. 

“What can I get you, hon?” The question was worded politely, but it felt more like a demand.

“I’m hoping for a job.”

“We’ve got bone broth and spotchka, my friend. Gonna have to settle for one of those I’m afraid.” 

Chuck tried to hide his disappointment. “Know of anywhere else that might be hiring around here?”

The woman scowled at him. “What makes you think this is the place to find employment?” 

“Looking for a place to settle with my kids. Sorgan seemed like a good place to do it.” 

She huffed a mirthless laugh. “Whoever told you that must not like you very much.” The stack of bowls she was carrying began to teeter precariously, but before they could fall, she rocked them back against her shoulder with practiced ease. She blew a wisp of greying hair out of her face. “Sorry.” 

Chuckles followed her over to the next table where she began her routine again. He stacked the glasses there before she could reach for them, cradling them against his chest while she glared. “Please.”

“Do I look like I make enough to pay you anything?” she said, clearly becoming irritated. “Look around you. This is about as full as it always is.”

“I’ll work for food then. For me and my kids. You don’t have to pay me. Just keep us fed. I know bone broth doesn’t cost that much to make.”

She reached for the glasses, but he pulled away, and she rolled her eyes in response before turning on her heel and trekking back behind the main counter. “If I fed every asshole that came in here with a sad story, I’d be running a soup kitchen, friend.” 

“Thought you said not many came through here,” he countered. She narrowed her eyes and was clearly about to tell him off when a loud slam on the wooden countertop interrupted them. Chuck looked to his left to see the Klatooinian ignoring him, choosing instead to glare at the woman. 

“You shortin’ me on spotchka again, Ry?” 

The woman gave him a tight smile. “As I’ve told you before, Broog, you get the same size bottle as everyone else.” Chuck could see she was doing her best to be cordial, but her fingers had started to drum nervously on the countertop. He makes her uneasy. He eyed the blaster at the Broog’s hip. 

The Klatooinian snarled. “Even if that were true, I should get more than the standard bottle. ‘Specially with everything going on right now. I’d hate to have to tell my clan this place isn’t welcoming.” 

Ry’s eye twitched, but she scoffed defiantly. “You really threatening the person that feeds you every day and makes sure you leave here drunk every night?” 

“Someone else could do it just as easy as you,” Broog slurred, and Chuck wrinkled his nose at the stench of his breath. “Sounds like buddy here wants a job. Maybe he could run this place better.” He went to rest his hand on Chuckles shoulder, but before his palm could settle, Chuck gripped his wrist, twisting it violently and almost certainly breaking it before he slammed the Klatooinian’s face down onto the wooden counter. It was as if all of the tension, frustration, and anger that he’d been carrying within him and pushing down for the last few rotations exploded in that instant, and a surge of satisfaction ripped through him as he felt the Klatooinian’s wrist fracture in his grip, almost as if for an instant, the galaxy was a little more balanced. 

The entire common house went silent. Ry took half a step back. 

Chuckles leaned down, speaking quietly in the Klatooinian’s ear. “It’s rude to threaten people, buddy. Especially nice ladies like this one here. Now, when I let you up, you’re gonna pay your tab, tip handsomely, and then get out of here. Understand?” 

Broog snarled. “I’ll beat your ass once you let me up, that’s what I’ll do. And then I’ll take what I want from this bitch before I see her place burned to the ground.”

“I don’t think so.”

Chuck dug his thumb into the Klatooinian’s wrist until he felt the bones crack and give further. Broog whimpered. 

He sighed in disappointment at his pinned quarry before rasping directly into Broog’s ear once more.

“Apologize.” 

Broog’s beady eyes darted up to where Ry was standing, having recovered, her hip cocked and her arms crossed in front of her. “‘M sorry. Now call your man off.”

“Louder.”

“ALRIGHT. I’M SORRY RY.”

“And will you be back?”

“NO. KARKING HELLS. NO.”

“Good boy.” Chuckles released him, patting him on the shoulder as he yanked the Klatooinian’s blaster from its holster at his hip. “I’ll be keeping this. Now, pay the lady. Don’t forget, leave her a good tip.” Broog yanked out as many credits as he could fit in a single hand, tossing them on the counter before he stormed out, snarling under his breath. 

Chuckles jerked his chin at the stack of credits on the counter. “That enough?”

Ry’s eyes flicked to them. “Not really. He owed me for about three more months of meals, but I suppose it’s better than nothing. Especially if he doesn’t come back.” She smirked, blowing the grey strands of hair back out of her face again. Her teeth dug into her lip as though she was thinking for a moment before she leaned over and swept the credits into an apron pocket. Straightening, she stacked the bowls in her arms once more, swiping at the stack of glasses Chuckles had set down. “We start cooking just after dawn for the mid day meal. Don’t be late…” 

“Chuck.”

She wrinkled her nose. “Really? That’s your name.”

“‘S the one I got.”

She shrugged. “Alright. Just after dawn. Don’t be late, Chuck.” 

He smiled under his face covering. “Yes ma’am.” 

—

Chuckles was back early the next morning, reaching the common house just as the sun crested the horizon. Most of the mud from the rain had dried, but there were still several large puddles in need of side-stepping as he carefully picked his way to the building’s entrance. He sported the last clean shirt he could find on the ship, rolling the sleeves up over his forearms and slipping on a vest to keep his commlink in. Arni had managed to rig up a rudimentary device that would allow them to at least message each other throughout the day, and Chuck had promised to buy them actual commlinks when he could find someone that was selling them. 

For now, it’s better than nothing.

He still had his face covered, wearing the dark goggles and a cloth mask over his nose and chin. When he stepped inside the common house, the place was empty with the exception of Ry, who was leaning her elbows on the counter, scrolling through a datapad. Her eyes flicked up to him as he stepped through the door, appraising him once more before raising an eyebrow. 

“You always keep your face covered?”

He shrugged casually. “Had a bad accident a few years ago. Got some scarring. Figured you wouldn’t want to scare your customers.” 

“Yeah because nothing says hospitality like a guy with his face totally hidden.” 

“You could always just put me on manual labor tasks in back.”

“Careful what you wish for, Chuck.”

There was a rustling behind Ry, and a female Togruta stepped out from where Chuck assumed the kitchens were. She had pale purple skin peppered with light scars and a white diamond and stripe pattern that framed her turquoise eyes. Her lekku were a similar shade of turquoise and striped with white, wrapping over the shoulder of the grey tunic she wore and dangling down her back. She didn’t speak, instead raising her hands and making rapid signs to Ry. Ry cast a nervous glance over her shoulder at Chuck before signing back, and only then did the Togruta appear to notice him. She gave him a shy smile, and he waved. 

“Hi.”

She didn’t answer him, instead refocusing on Ry, continuing to rapidly sign at her. They carried on a wordless conversation for a few moments before the Togruta huffed a sigh, taking Ry’s hands and giving them a squeeze, her thumbs grazing over the woman’s knuckles. She gave Ry a final fond look before her eyes darted to Chuckles one more time as she came around the counter and stepped past him and out the door. Ry watched her go before staring Chuckles down. 

“Who was that?” he asked innocently.

“Our cook.” 

“Seems like you two have a… special working relationship.” 

Ry glared at him. “I don’t talk about my personal life with my employees.” 

“You know I have kids.”

“I know you say you have kids. For all I know, you could be lying through your teeth. Assuming you have teeth since I can’t really tell with the whole face getup.” 

“I’ll just have to bring them with me someday so you know I’m not lying.” 

Ry tossed a rag at him. “Get to wiping the tables.” He gave her a mock salute before heading over to the first one, carefully sweeping any dust or leftover crumbs away. Ry resumed reading whatever she was looking at on her datapad, occasionally tapping away at the keys. 

“How old are your kids?” she asked after a few moments. 

Kriff.

“Uh… thirteen. And five. I think.” He made a mental note to actually ask them at some point. 

Her eyebrow raised. “Not off to a strong start on convincing me you actually have kids.”

“They’re adopted.”

“Uh huh.” 

The silence settled for another few moments before Chuckles felt emboldened enough to ask a question. 

“What’s the cook’s name?”

“Why, you going to ask her out to dinner?”

“Not when she’s clearly spoken for.”

Ry glared at him over the top of her datapad. “Oksann.”

“Where did you learn to sign like that?” he followed up. 

“Nope, you don’t get to ask two. That’s not how this works.”

“I’m surprised it’s working at all, what with your sunny disposition.” She glowered at him, but said nothing. “Fine. What’s your next question?”

She leaned forward on her elbows. “What happened to your face?”

He sighed. At least this isn’t a lie. “Ship crash. Was learning to fly, stalled it out, something went wrong with the eject. I wound up slamming into the canopy with my helmet halfway on. There was metal and transparisteel everywhere, and unsurprisingly, I got sliced up. Wasn’t pretty.”

“Apparently still isn’t.”

“You could say that.” He could smell the first wafts of the bone broth beginning to drift from the back where Oksann had emerged from. His mouth watered and his stomach grumbled loud enough for Ry to glance up from her datapad again. 

“You didn’t eat today?” 

“That’s another question.” She rolled her eyes at him before disappearing into the back, emerging a few moments later with a steaming bowl. “Here. Eat. I need you on your feet for the whole day.” He just stood there staring for a moment, his fingers flexing nervously. Ry could clearly sense his nerves, although she certainly hadn’t identified the source. “It’s not charity. Consider it an advance. Or quality control. Whatever.” He stepped towards the counter hesitantly, and she set the bowl in front of him. 

“Could you…” he paused. 

She gave him a confused look before it appeared to dawn on her. “Really? I can’t see you while you’re eating?”

“I… I’m not accustomed to people seeing my face. Not yet.”

She sighed. “Alright. But for the record, I promise you I’ve seen worse.” She turned, resting her back against the counter. Chuckles took the opportunity to read her datapad over her shoulder. Inventory. A message from Oksann. News updates. Nothing too concerning. He pulled the mask down, blowing cautiously on the first spoonful of broth before bringing it to his lips. 

It was the best soup he’d ever had, and he couldn’t keep an audible satisfied sound from slipping from him. 

“I see why you keep Oksann around,” he teased. “By the way, is ‘Ry’ short for anything?” 

She sighed. “Ryena. But no one calls me that anymore. It’s just Ry.”

“Got it.” 

Chuckles finished his bone broth as quickly as he could, eventually picking up the bowl and tipping it back to empty every last bit into his mouth before placing the bowl back on the counter with a clatter. 

“Thank you,” he said after pulling the covering back up over his face. 

Ry turned, taking the bowl and giving him a smirk. “Well, at least I know you have teeth now. I could hear you chewing.” 

Under the mask, he grinned. “If you say so.”

Tag List: @seriowan @partoftheeternalsoul @rosmariner @misogirl828 @ellichonkasaurusrex @zoeykallus @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @gjrain20-starwars @moonstrider9904

#karrde writes #fanfiction #fan fic #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #one step at a time #osaat #OC Chuckles #Chuckles #OC Arni #Arni #OC Nita #Nita #Chuckles Ayyshu #Arni Ayyshu #Nita Ayyshu #Clone OC #Jedi OC #Pantoran OC #Twilek OC #found family #fluff #angst

[fandom-friday]

Karrde's Fandom Friday Rec #3 (4/26/24)

For my last rec this week, I think I'm gonna do a self-rec for the first time ever. I'm finally going to have time to write (which I am very excited about) since I quit my job this week, and my 18+ fic One Step at a Time is going to be at the top of my "to write" list. It's a fic centered around my clone pilot OC Chuckles and two jedi youngling OCs (Arni and Nita). It's got accidental parenting, a healthy amount of Chuckles's terrible jokes, plenty of whump and angst, and a pinch of spice. I'm pretty proud of it thus far and where it's going, so if you haven't checked it out already, I would love for you to give it a read!

Art by the supremely talented @ninjigma!!!

Participate in Fandom Friday to show your favorite creators from this week some love! :)

#FANDOM FRIDAY #creator appreciation #fic rec #fanfiction #fan fic #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #nsft #lemon #lemony lemon #clone OC #jedi OC #OC Chuckles #OC Arni #OC Nita #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Nita Ayyshu #found family #angst #whump

[wild-karrde]

For Fandom Friday:

ONE STEP AT A TIME

I love every character in this story. You need to know I'm in love with Arni, Nita, & Chuck's stories, and Chuck reigns as DILF supreme in my head. If my husband sees this, I hope he knows that Chuck is competition 😏 but seriously, Karrde, I love the way you write anything and everything, especially this story.

Awww Teddie, this is so sweet and I really appreciate it. I know it's been forever since I've updated this fic, but I did start picking at it again and finally getting some inspiration/motivation this week. It means a lot to see how much you like it because I do adore it and the little family in it. It's always scary releasing an OC-centric fic, but seeing comments like this really make my day. Thank you for the very kind rec!

Participate in Fandom Friday to show your favorite creators from this week some love! :)

#FANDOM FRIDAY #creator appreciation #fic rec #fanfiction #fan fic #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #clone oc #jedi oc #OC Chuckles #OC Arni #OC Nita #Chuckles Ayyshu #Arni Ayyshu #Nita Ayyshu #found family

[wild-karrde]

In my Ayyshu family feels...

Would Chuckles really just take in two younglings like that?

Absolutely. What do you think happened every time a batch of shinies got added to the 28th Combat Wing? Some of his brothers didn't see the point in making new friends; they were the most likely to die in battle anyway, inexperienced or the first to rush into danger without thinking. But Chuck wanted every new member of their wing to know that to him, they mattered. He'd shove them playfully, crack jokes, prank them, bring them into the fold. Because of course he understood how short their lives were likely to be. He's painted enough stars on his helmet to know that he'll need more before the paint on the last ones has dried.

So would Chuck take two Jedi younglings in without thinking much of it? Of course. They need a family, so he'll be it. They need protecting, so he'll keep them safe. They need to know someone cares.

For him, it was a no-brainer.

#sorry just thinking about them #i love them so much #OC Chuckles #OC Nita #OC Arni #Chuckles Ayyshu #Arni Ayyshu #Nita Ayyshu #Clone OC #Clone Pilot OC #Jedi OC #OSaaT #karrde writes #one step at a time #i promise I'm writing more for them #just been a bit hectic recently

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 15

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: I have been SO EXCITED for this chapter, and also INCREDIBLY NERVOUS, but HERE IT IS! As always, thank you to the stupendous @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta reading this for me!

Chapter Rating: M

Warnings: language, mention of suicide, mention of character death, grief

Word Count: 8.4k words

Chuckles didn’t go back to the Starlight.

He didn’t have any idea where his feet were carrying him until he slid onto a stool in the tiny excuse of a cantina the settlement had. As far as he knew, the place had at least three different names, and he’d never been certain which one was the official one. It always seemed to reek of death sticks and sweat, and it attracted mostly miners, leaving smears of dust from their boots across the floor. It wasn’t much, but the camaraderie and feel of the place reminded him of 79s, although the clone bar had definitely been cleaner, even on its worst days.

He wasn’t sure why he’d come here. Throughout his training and the war, he’d had more than enough medical droids warn him against drinking with a concussion, and he’d been stupid enough to ignore that advice only once. The worst hangover of his life combined with the exceptionally loud ass-chewing Crater had given him were enough to ensure he never would make that mistake again. His captain hadn’t normally been one to raise his voice, but he suspected the volume of the reprimand had been part of the punishment. 

Maybe he wanted to be around people, to blend into a crowd. 

Unfortunately, the place was mostly empty. 

Should have guessed that. Could have if my head wasn’t throbbing. 

Only two other patrons were there, tucked into corner booths. Normally, you couldn’t hear the music coming from the rundown player in the corner, but tonight, the notes easily carried across the cantina, cutting through the silence even at their low volume. 

Chuck chose a seat at the far end of the bar, away from the other patrons. He hadn’t gotten a good enough look to determine who they were, but he didn’t want to sit close enough to encourage conversation. Just because he wanted to be around people didn’t mean he actually wanted to interact with them. 

He just didn’t want to feel alone. 

Even with the concussion, he was thinking clearly enough to know he wasn’t ready to go back to the Starlight, to the kids he didn’t have answers for, to the sheets that still smelled like the woman that had just told him killing those kids and the use of inhibitor chips were justified. 

Did she actually say that though?

Chuckles folded his hands and stabbed his thumbs into the crease between his brows, his eyes squeezed shut. 

Stop trying to give her an out. 

He’d always been one to try and justify, to rationalize someone’s bad intentions away in favor of some less malicious reasoning. Crater had teased him about his optimism, but if he was honest, the majority of that optimism had died with Crater and most of his squad. 

But this was Endi. She loved kids, or she at least seemed to tolerate them better than most. She loved to teach. She baked the best desserts he’d ever had. Sunlight sparkled in her eyes and her laugh sounded like music. She was gentle and kind and soft and sweet, and the person he believed her to be simply did not match the woman he’d sat next to tonight. The two women were incompatible in every way, and yet they were the same, and no amount of spin or mental contortions would change the fact that she was a danger to Arni and Nita, a danger to him. 

How did I not see it?

His mind was still churning when he felt someone sit down next to him heavily. He ignored them for a moment before he felt a nudge in his shoulder. 

“I expected a better welcome,” Anj croaked. “You’d think I hadn’t almost died today.” 

He huffed mirthlessly as he tried not to stare. Anj’s head was wrapped in a wad of bandages that hid one eye. The other eye still glittered brightly but sported a massive bruise around the socket, and the cut on her cheek had been bandaged. The arm she had injured was in a sling, and he could see that two of her fingers were splinted. Every movement she made felt slow and carefully calculated, and he’d seen enough injured brothers to be able to see what body parts she was favoring or trying to keep away from scrutiny. In his estimate, she had at least a few injured ribs as well, an ankle that was giving her trouble, and she had all of the same muscle soreness he did. 

If she noticed him tallying her injuries, she didn’t comment. Instead, with her good hand, she slid him an unlabeled green bottle across the worn wooden bartop.

 “It was Lu’s. He kept the strongest stuff in town.” She sighed, her voice breaking slightly. “‘S not strong enough for this, though.” 

Chuckles rolled the bottle between his hands, examining the amber liquid inside. He wasn’t certain she wanted him to ask how she got it. So he didn’t.

“I can’t drink this right now.” He tapped his temple. “Concussed.”

She scoffed, taking the bottle back. “More for me then, I suppose.”

A glass of water brushed Chuckles’s knuckles, and he glanced up to see the barkeep standing on the other side of the counter, watching him carefully. He’d never been certain what species they were and figured it would be rude to guess, but they were at least visibly humanoid, a handful of centimeters taller than Chuck with dark skin and even darker eyes. Their shock of pink hair was woven into tight braids that hung down their back to their waist, and silver piercings sparkled from their nose and ears. They went by Mona and normally, they met their patrons with a smile and joke, but tonight, he could see sadness and sympathy in their eyes. 

Word’s gotten around about what happened.

“Thanks Mona,” he rasped. 

“Let me know if you need more. Anything for you, Anj?” 

The Nautolan raised the bottle she was drinking from wordlessly, and Mona took it, sniffing before wrinkling their nose. 

“I’d normally tell you to take outside shit back outside, but that’s Lu’s isn’t it?” 

Anj nodded, her eyes falling to the wooden bartop. 

“His stuff always could take the lining off your stomach,” Mona said softly, their deep voice suddenly more gravelly. “I’m sorry.”

Anj just nodded again, and Chuckles could see her swallow hard, her teeth digging into her lower lip as her thumb rubbed over the bottle. Mona met Chuck’s eyes one more time before slipping out of view. 

“How’s Hells?” Chuckles asked, hoping the news would be good enough to bring Anj up a little.

“She’ll live. Lost a lot of blood, but we… we got her there in time. A few more minutes, and we’d be having a very different conversation.” 

Chuckles fought off a shudder at the possibility that they’d eluded. 

She’s alive. She’s ok.

“She may never walk unaided again though.” The statement was forced out through gritted teeth, and Anj’s voice broke on the end of the last word. 

“But she’ll walk,” Chuckles said softly. 

“Yeah. Yeah, she will.” Anj rasped with a soft, pained laugh. “Once she woke up, she was already chattering about what sort of cane she’d want, and how I shouldn’t worry because it will make her that much more interesting.” She took a swig from the bottle, hardly flinching at the harshness of the liquor inside. “Her first thought was to comfort me, as if I was the one that almost lost her leg today. As if I was the one that almost bled out in her arms.” She sniffed. “Like I always say, she’s a kindness I never accounted for in my life.”

“Petal?” Chuckles prompted after a moment.

Anj sighed, dropping her voice low as if someone might hear. “The first time she… she touched my face, it was so gentle. I flinched because of my previous partner, but Helly was slow and patient with me. She never pushed me, but it made me want to let her have more of me.” She paused. “There was a tree on one of the small islands near where I grew up on Glee Anselm. I can’t even remember if the island had a name now, but I remember the tree. It would bloom every spring with these pale pink blossoms, and towards summer, it would drop the petals when the wind would pick up. My sister and I loved to run and dance in them when it happened, and that sensation of the petals grazing my cheek, that’s what Helly made me think of the first time she touched my face. So, she’s Petal to me.” 

“Execute Order 66.”

The memory of the tree in the Jedi temple gardens slammed into Chuckles, and tears leapt into his eyes. He swallowed hard, burying that moment of peace and the violence that had followed. 

“That’s… that’s really beautiful, Anj,” he croaked out. 

“So is she,” the Nautolan replied, seemingly not noticing his turmoil or chalking it up to the day they’d both had. 

They sat in silence for a while. Chuckles had a million questions he wanted to ask Anj, but he wasn’t sure if now was the time. She was clearly grieving, and the day’s events had taken a toll on them both. 

But I need to know. I need to know so I can protect the kids. 

“Why’d he do it?” 

The question was out of his mouth before he could overthink it. The Nautolan didn’t meet his gaze, locking her dark eye on the shelves at the back of the bar as if the half-empty bottles were suddenly the most interesting thing in the universe. 

“What makes you think I know?” Her tone was slow, deliberate, just like his had been when he’d been trying to disentangle himself from Endi an hour before. 

“Hells said something in the mine. That she didn’t think he’d do something. That you both didn’t think it.” 

Anj shrugged, taking a drink before answering. 

“Helly was delirious with pain. She didn’t know what she was saying. Surprised she could even get a coherent sentence strung together.”

“Anjii.” Annoyance flared within Chuckles. He leaned closer, dropping his voice low. “I need you to tell me what you know. I need to keep my kids safe, and I can’t do that if I don’t have all the information. I need to know what you know, otherwise you’re putting Arni and Nita in danger.”

Anj said nothing for a moment, but a muscle in her jaw ticked in anger. Her eye darted around the bar one last time, ensuring no one was listening to them before she lowered her voice. 

“I’ve done a hell of a lot to keep your kids safe, Chuckles. More than you’ll ever know.” Her unbandaged eye finally met his, piercing even in the dim lighting. “And I did it without you having to tell me anything you didn’t want to. Even though you didn’t trust me fully.” 

Chuckles shrank back in his seat, his heart thundering in his chest. Anj’s expression softened as she took his reaction in. His mind raced, rapid thoughts bouncing off the pounding throb behind his eyes.

She knows. We have to get out of here. 

He stood. Anj’s good hand clamped around his forearm. 

“Sit,” she hissed. “If you run now, you’ll only make this worse. There’ll be questions. Now, sit.” 

Chuckles stood still, his mind scrambling to pull a stream of logical thoughts together, but panic overwhelmed him. 

What does she know? Who else knows? How long do we have?

“Sit. Down.” 

He sat. 

Anj watched him for a moment before casting another cautious glance around. She leaned in closer, her voice slightly above a whisper.

“The day we helped move the kids down to the hold, Arni ran back up to get one more thing out of the bunk. Now, I was holding the last armful of knick-knacks, so that struck me as odd, but kids sometimes have things stashed, so I thought nothing of it. They came back a few minutes later with something shoved up under their shirt. I didn’t press, but they stumbled on the last step, and that metallic something clattered out onto the floor. I turned, and they were hurriedly shoving it back out of view.” Her tongue darted out to wet her lips. “I’ve seen many weapons in my time, Chuck. Several of the variety they were carrying, although never up close.”

Their lightsaber. She saw their lightsaber.

Chuckles felt like the bottom of his stomach was going to drop out. His mind frantically raced, trying and failing to come up with a believable explanation as to why an eleven-year-old would have a Jedi weapon.

“Anj-”

She raised her hand to cut him off. “I turned away, and as far as they know and as far as I’m concerned, I never saw it. Got it?” 

He nodded, unable to formulate words. 

Her eye was flicking over every centimeter of his face, taking in his reaction, watching him process the new information. Finally, she spoke again. 

“I need you to understand that you can trust me. That there is nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you and your kids safe. Hells knows too. I couldn’t keep it from her. She knows me too well. But there are people that you’re close to that wouldn’t do the same.”

“I know about Endi,” he said quietly. 

Anj’s mouth drew into a thin line. 

“Ah,” was all she said. 

“I mean, I didn’t know, not until tonight,” he stumbled. “I thought… I don’t know what I thought, but it wasn’t that. I just… that’s why I’m here. And not at home. I don’t understand what happened, and I don’t have answers.” He scrubbed his hands over his face before tugging gently on his mohawk. “Why didn’t you tell me about her?” 

A look of guilt clouded Anj’s features. She rolled her shoulders, rolling the bottle between her hands. “Thought you’d see it on your own eventually. And I wasn’t sure how to intervene without telling you what I knew. I wasn’t sure how you’d react to me knowing something you didn’t want me to.” 

“It’s not that I didn’t want to tell you, Anj,” he rasped, his throat suddenly tightening on him. “I wanted to. The kids love you and Hells. I just… the last place we were at, I told people. And then those people had to lie for us, and that put them in danger. And I… I didn’t want to do that to you.” 

“You wanted to tell her.”

“I did,” he gritted out. “Almost did tonight. Thank the Maker she told me where she stood first.” 

Anj was quiet for a moment. “There wasn’t much about the war that made it out here. Lots of folks have to just believe what they see on the feeds. That’s all we get out here.” 

“You know better.”

“I do. But I wasn’t always on Lothal.” 

Chuckles paused. “You said you saw… a weapon like Arni’s before.”

Anj nodded, taking another deep pull from the bottle, drawing her lips back from her teeth in a grimace as the liquor burned her insides. “I did. Was in Chaleydonia on Christophsis when the war broke out. The Separatists moved in quick, and then there was a siege and a battle, and I decided I wanted no part of it, so I headed for Lothal. Seemed like it wouldn’t see much action, and my bet paid off. Well, until now, I suppose.” 

“And that was enough? To make you see things differently about the Jedi?”

Anj shrugged again. “I don’t claim to understand the ins and outs of everything that happened politically at that time. But I do know what the Jedi meant to people. Growing up, we were taught that they were peacekeepers. The stuff of legends, really. And regardless of how much of that was true or not, I don’t see how killing off all of them did anyone a lick of good.” She shivered slightly, and her grip tightened around the bottle, now only about half full. Her voice dropped even lower. 

“I’m no fan of the Empire. Wasn’t that big on the Republic either, but they at least felt like they tried at times. The Empire just seems keen to get as much power as they can and quash any naysayers. And all that about the Jedi? I don’t know everything, but I cannot imagine a galaxy that would be better off without Arni and Nita existing.” 

Chuckles’s vision blurred, and his voice cracked. He sniffed hard. “Me either.” 

He felt Anj’s eye on him and turned to meet her gaze. More questions were looming in her expression, and he could guess what they were. 

You can trust her. You know you can. 

He took a deep breath. 

“My chip didn’t work,” he said softly. “I was still in service at the end of the war. I’d gone to the temple to see someone, and that’s when all hell broke loose. I-I saw them, my brothers, killing Jedi, killing children.” His hands were shaking, and he folded them together, clasping tightly to keep the tremors in check. “I found the kids and got them out. At first I thought… I thought it had to be Seppies. That they’d gotten ahold of clone armor and snuck in. There was no universe in which I could fathom them doing that.”

“So the chips were real?”

“I think so. Never got any official confirmation, but when the order was given, there was a sharp pain in my head, like something trying to activate, crazy as that may sound.” His fingers drifted up to graze the place on his scalp where he’d felt that stabbing pressure that day. “I just… they’d never have done that, Anj. Not without something making them.”

“Why didn’t yours work?”

He huffed a laugh. “The only thing I can figure is too many concussions. I’ve come down on that place on my head at least twice. Best guess is I’ve damaged it. So I kept my wits about me by sheer dumb luck.”

Anj chuckled quietly. “So your concussions saved your life. And theirs.” She extended the lip of the bottle towards the rim of his water glass. 

“It’s bad luck to toast with water,” he mumbled. 

“You think we haven’t used up all the bad luck today?”

Chuckles huffed at that, clinking his glass of water against her bottle. “Luck didn’t have much to do with it.”

“Oh, I think we’re luckier than you know,” Anj said softly. 

The Nautolan sighed deeply, clearly still wrestling with how much to tell him. Finally, she gingerly turned, fishing a piece of folded flimsi out of her back pocket and placing it on the bar top. She drummed her fingers on it, still thinking until finally, she let out a long, slow exhale. 

“Judging by the fact that you’re still sitting here and not halfway to hyperspace, I’m going to assume you’ve decided to trust me with your secret. At least, I’m hoping you’re not going to kill me after we leave here.” Her lip was curled into a nervous smirk. 

“Thought hadn’t even crossed my mind. Plus, I think I still like your odds, even with one arm in a sling,” he joked with a pained wink. 

Anj relaxed slightly. “Right. Well, then it’s only fair I put my trust in you.” She tapped the paper. “This was in the breast pocket of the shirt you had on. Hells was still clutching it when they brought her into the med tent.” 

His brow furrowed in confusion. “I didn’t have anything in that pocket.” 

“It’s from Lu.” 

Chuckles’s blood pounded in his ears as his brain raced back to the moments just before the explosion. He remembered Lu’s expression, the way he’d awkwardly patted Chuck’s chest, just above the pocket. 

“Karking hells,” he swore quietly. 

“I’m going to tell you what I know about Lu,” Anj continued, as if she hadn’t heard him. “And then you and I are gonna read this together. I tried. I couldn’t do it. It’s addressed to you. And I just can’t do it.” 

Chuckles nodded slowly. “Alright.” 

Anj studied the bottle between her hands, and he could see she was steeling herself for what she was about to share. He propped his feet on the bar stool and faced forward, occasionally glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. He knew she’d speak when she was ready, and he didn’t want to stare at her or the folded note sitting next to her elbow. Finally, she spoke, her voice gravelly and grief-stricken. 

“Lu was like you and I,” she rasped tightly. “Has a past he’s running from. His homeworld was one of the first to have the Empire clamp a manacle on it. Entire cities occupied with patrols in the streets, picking people up for silly things like being out past curfew. Lu and a few others didn’t take kindly to that and raised a bit of hell about it. Most of his friends got locked up, but Lu had his twin sister Cilli and her family depending on him, so he managed to get out and ran here. He’s been lying low, sending money home to Cilli and her kids. They were close. Real close. Their parents died young, so they’ve been looking out for one another ever since. Cilli’s second pregnancy was so hard, and her man cut and ran when things got tough, so Lu stepped up.” Anj paused to take another swig from the bottle, wincing slightly. “Someone got a message to Lu yesterday. The Empire found out Cilli was getting credits from him. Not sure how. He was so careful, running the credits through all sorts of different places to make sure it didn’t trace back to him. But someone figured it out, and the Imperials classified that as conspiring with a traitor to the Empire. Apparently they take their treason quite seriously, and they raided the house. With detonators.” 

She paused to let out a shuddering breath. 

“The kids were inside, and they didn’t care. Kids. Gone in an instant. They were closest to the door. As you can imagine, Cilli didn’t take it lying down, not after seeing her babies die. From what it sounds like, she went out with a blaster in her hand and a curse on her lips.” 

Anj’s head was down, her tendrils hiding her face. Chuckles could still hear her quivering exhales. The blood was drained from her knuckles, and it was a wonder the bottle in her hand hadn’t shattered in her grip.

“I commed Lu to give him a heads up about the inspectors yesterday, and when he didn’t answer, I went over to check on him. He’s normally pretty responsive, so it struck me as odd. When I got there, I could tell right away something was wrong. He was quiet, more quiet than usual, but there was a tremor in his hands and an anger I could just feel rolling off of him. I finally pressed enough for him to tell me, and when he started talking, it was like he couldn’t stop the words. I told him to take the week off, to not do anything rash. But the minute I saw him today, I knew he hadn’t listened.” 

Chuckles chewed the inside of his cheek as he turned the information over in his head. He certainly understood that anger that Lu had felt. There had absolutely been days where he’d felt the losses so deeply that he’d considered burning everything down. 

The difference is you didn’t. Because your remaining brothers would have faced the consequences.  

“Anger and grief are a deadly combination,” he murmured bitterly. “Keeps you from thinking clearly. And that’s when you put the other people you care about in danger.” 

Anj’s head snapped up, and her eye pierced into him fiercely. 

“Watch your tongue.”

He glared back at her, taking a sip of his water. “He brought the damn shaft down on us, Anj. He almost killed us too. I get his anger, trust me, I do. But I would never have done something that could have gotten others I cared about hurt.”

“And Lu didn’t either,” she snarled under her breath. 

“How do you figure?” 

She sighed, picking at the edge of one of her bandages. 

“I didn’t know the reason for the inspection until this morning. The new shaft was pushed for by the Empire in order to meet their quotas, so they provided small mining corporations with some of the construction materials as incentives to expand. Every screw and strut and gear in that shaft comes from Imperial factories, and apparently, that means they’re built by the lowest bidder.” She scoffed angrily. “Jerrno got notice from some of his partners that the inspectors were coming to look at the construction of the shaft. Apparently, they’ve been making the rounds, claiming shafts aren’t being constructed properly, but they’re just covering their own asses. The beams we were supplied with can’t hold what they’re spec’ed to. Another mine saw a collapse last month, and the inspectors came out and blamed the corp and their construction processes. But when they tested out a few of the extra beams they had leftover, they found the struts didn’t even come close to being as durable as they were supposed to be.” 

Chuckles nodded slowly as she met his gaze once more, her voice quieter. 

“Lu was the best damn demolitions expert I’ve ever seen. He could blow a mite off a massiff without waking it up. He had no way of knowing about the fucking beams. Teef was filling me in right when Lu walked in.” Her voice broke. “You think what you want, but I believe Lu just wanted to take out the shaft and inspectors, not bring the entire cliff down on us. That collapse was far too uncontrolled for one of his explosions.” 

Her fist tightened around the neck of the bottle, and the muscle in her jaw twitched angrily again.

 “They weren’t even going to tell us about the beams. The inspectors just strolled in this morning without so much as a ‘hello’ or ‘fuck you’. They were just gonna tell us it was our fault. Probably still will.” 

She drained the bottle, tossing it into a bin at the back of the bar before she turned to face Chuckles again. 

“Lu didn’t almost kill us, but the Empire sure did.” 

Chuckles let out a long, shuddering breath. All of the anger and resentment he felt leaked out of him, and grief swiftly settled into its place. Of course Lu hadn’t meant to hurt them, not the Lu that had held Nita’s hand or listened to Arni babble on for hours, not the Lu that had quietly showed up with furniture for the kids’ room and watched with a quiet smile as they squealed over it. There was almost a relief for Chuckles, to let the pieces fall into place and find that the Nikto he’d known was the same person he’d always thought he was, the confirmation that Lu was the Lu he’d seemed to be. 

It still felt as though he’d lost two people today, Lu and the Endi he thought he’d known, and he grieved them both. Tears streamed from his eyes, and he wiped at them hurriedly, sniffling hard. 

“I’m so sorry, Anj.” 

“You had no way of knowing,” she croaked. “I just… I know he’s going to get branded as a terrorist, an unhinged and dangerous and cruel man.” 

It’s already happening, Chuckles thought, Endi’s words echoing in his mind. 

“But we know better,” Anj continued. “We knew him.” 

“We did,” Chuckles agreed. Quietly, he reached over for the note. Anj didn’t move. Taking a deep breath, he unfolded the paper. 

Chuck,

I can’t give this to Anj or Hells. They’ll know immediately and stop me. So I’m sorry, but it has to be you. I know you may not get my reasoning, and that’s fine, but I know you’ll understand wanting to keep loved ones safe, and the anger that comes with failing at that. Tell Anj I’m sorry, but I can’t let it stand. I’m sure she’ll tell you why, about my sister. All that I had in this galaxy was spilled on Cilli’s front stoop. I can’t stand for it, but I can damn sure fall making my point. 

I don’t know how Arni and Nita came to be yours, but keep them safe at all costs. I’ve taken your name off the roster for today and for the rest of the week. Left a note for Jerrno that I didn’t want your name involved, especially being a clone. I’m confident that’ll be enough, and Anj’ll see that it is.

You and your kids are special, a symbol of hope in a galaxy turned on its head. I hope they have the future I wanted for my kin. See that they do. And see that Arni keeps that laser sword better hidden. 

It’s better this way. I know too many names and too many places, and I can’t have any more blood on my soul. Tell Anj and Hells I’m sorry. I hope they’ll forgive me and know that they were the family I chose. You all were. 

Lu

“That shithead did see,” Anj breathed over Chuckles’s shoulder. “He was right behind me, that day on the ship, but I stepped in front of Arni, trying to hide it better.” She choked out a laugh. “Never reacted, and had a perfect sabacc face about it when I probed later. Karking asshole.” 

“The roster?” Chuckles managed to grit out around the emotions that were overwhelming him.

“I’ll see that it’s handled,” Anj said quietly. “And I’ll testify to whoever that will listen that Lu acted alone, that he’d been nursing anti-Imperial sentiment for a long time, but we never thought it’d get this far.” 

“Anj, I can’t ask that-”

“You’re not askin’. I’m telling you how it’s going to be. Maker alive, Lu wasn’t stupid, but this was impulsive and short-sighted and driven by grief. He planned all these contingencies, but he didn’t really think this through. And now, here we are, picking up the pieces and trying to stay safe while he fucks off into whatever afterlife he believed in.” Chuckles could see her moving through her grief, allowing some anger at her friend to finally show. 

“It won’t even take them long to fix that shaft,” she snorted. “A few months at most, even if we replace all the struts, and we’ll be right back down there. I know I told him to not do anything rash, but if he’d… I’d have…” She took a deep, steadying breath. “I’d have at least helped him make sure it counted for something.”

It was then that Chuckles saw it. Anj sat back, her unbandaged eye glistening with unshed tears, and yes, there was grief there, but more than that, there was betrayal. She’d thought Lu would reach out to her, would allow her to help him when he needed her most, and instead, he’d gone alone. 

“He kept you safe by keeping you out of it,” Chuckles rasped, reaching over and gripping her hand. She tried to yank it away, but he held on tightly. “And for that, I’m grateful, Anj. Because I’d have done the same.”

“I doubt that,” she snorted, wiping at her eye with her good hand. “Even as reckless as you are.” 

Chuckles was quiet for a beat before he folded his hands in front of him. “When I was a pilot, I lost a lot of brothers. Pretty much my entire squad once. I got out by the skin of my teeth. A pilot’s death isn’t like a normal soldier. We don’t bleed out slowly on some battlefield. It’s rare we even get a shot at a medic. If a ship’s done, it’s done, and in the middle of a fight, it’s not like you can take it to a hangar for maintenance.” 

He felt Anj watching him, and he pressed on slowly. 

“Sometimes, when your ship’s damaged and there’s no hope of you making it home, you do something reckless. You do what you can to steer your fighter and take out as many of the bad guys as you can. It’s not an official thing we’re trained to do, but many of my brothers did. Of course they knew it wasn’t always guaranteed to do much. Sometimes, you’re just a spec of flame on the side of a much bigger battle station. But the thing is, you hope that at a minimum, someone will see it happen, will see you doing everything you can with the moments that you have left, and you hope that galvanizes them.” He ran his thumb along the edge of his water glass. “I think Lu knew as well as you do that it wouldn’t take them long to rebuild, but I think what he hoped is that we’ll be galvanized by what he did. We’ll see what the Empire did to him and his family, and we’ll see his final act of defiance, and we’ll carry that spirit with us and spread it.” He tugged lightly at his mohawk. “I’ve been hiding for the last year, worried that if I stepped into the fight again, I’d put my kids and those around us at risk. But now… I don’t know.” 

“I don’t know either,” Anj said quietly. “But what I do know is I’m not sure I can let it all stand. Same as Lu. But I haven’t an inkling of where to start.” 

Chuckles took another sip of his water. “Right now, I think the best thing we can do is keep Lu’s memory and message alive,” Chuckles whispered. “Let the anger and the grief pass so that you think clearly. And then you wait.” 

“Wait?”

He nodded. “The opportunities will come. We start small. Maybe someone like Lu or me needs a job, and we help them get one and cover their tracks. Maybe some expensive equipment goes missing.” 

Anj chewed her lip, and he could see her thinking. “Maybe someone with a lot of pull finds out about the construction materials in the mines.” 

“Maybe,” he agreed. Grief was still the main emotion in his system, but Chuckles could feel something sparking in his chest, like a nearly-dead ember being blown upon. He hadn’t felt that spark in over a year, but it felt good, right even. 

Maybe I’m finally on the right path. 

He could feel a similar energy radiating off of Anj. The slump in her shoulders had disappeared, and a hint of her usual smirk was tugging at the corner of her mouth. “For Lu,” she said quietly, holding out her pinky finger on her uninjured hand towards Chuckles. 

He grinned. 

“For Lu,” he promised, locking his pinky with hers. 

“But tonight, we rest.”

“Some of us do,” he corrected her. “I’m not supposed to sleep much.” 

“I don’t know that either of us will do much of that,” Anj said quietly, some of the sadness seeping back in. “But we can still try.”

“We can.” Chuckles pushed his stool back from the bar, standing carefully. He folded the flimsi back up and slid it back to Anj. “You keep this.” 

She nodded wordlessly, taking the note between her calloused fingers and rubbing it gently. “Don’t come ‘round the mine until I tell you it’s safe, got it?” she whispered.

“Yes ma’am.” He gently clapped a hand on her shoulder. “Take care of yourself. And give Hells my love. Let us know if there’s anything we can do.” 

“When she’s better, can you bring the kids around?” Anj asked quietly. Chuckles could hear the emotion she was holding back. “They always make her light up.” 

“You got it,” he said quietly. 

She nodded. 

“‘Night Mona!” Chuckles called over his shoulder. He thought he heard them call a soft response, but he was already out the door.

He wasn’t sure if it was the water or the conversation or his headache finally fading a bit, but a determination had settled into his chest, one that he hadn’t realized had been lying dormant in the year since the war. He wanted to do something, even if he wasn’t sure what that was yet. 

But we’ve got to be safe. I can’t put the kids in danger. 

But what am I teaching them if we just keep running and hiding?

How to survive.

But what if they want more than that? 

His mind was still wrestling with itself, even as he made his way home, his feet carrying him back to the Starlight as if on autopilot. The interior of the ship was dark and quiet, and he could still smell the dinner he’d shared with Arni and Nita hours ago. The familiarity of it all brought a sense of relief, and he was suddenly overwhelmed with exhaustion. He kicked off his boots with a sigh, shutting the hatch behind him. 

Home. But maybe not settled. 

His eyes burned, and he ground the heel of his hand into them, huffing a quiet laugh.

One step at a time. 

A soft shuffling sound broke him out of his haze, an incongruence from his expectations that jarred him just enough to draw his attention. His eyes snapped to the co-pilot seat. 

Arni was sitting in it, wrapped in the heavy blanket from his bunk. They clearly hadn’t anticipated him coming home, but their sharp brown eyes quickly scanned his face, absorbing everything as usual. He was too tired and overwhelmed to try and hide his feelings anymore tonight.  

“Why are you up, kid?” he asked. 

They shrugged. “Woke up and couldn’t fall back asleep.” 

“Nita?”

“Out. She was pretty tired.” 

Chuckles nodded, trudging over to the pilot seat and plopping into it. He let his gaze drift out the front viewport to the stars, taking in the mountains and the soft glow of the town, suddenly less welcoming than it had seemed when he’d woken up this morning. 

Maker alive, morning feels like a lifetime ago. When Lu was still here.

It wasn’t all threatening. There was good in the little town still, but there were also threats he’d let slide past his defenses, and now more than ever, he needed to be cautious.

“I’m glad you’re safe,” Arni said softly, interrupting his thoughts. 

He sighed heavily. “Me too, kid. I’m sorry I scared you like that.”

“Wasn’t your fault,” they replied, hugging the blanket closer around them. 

“Is that why you can’t sleep?”

They nodded. “When… when we first heard about the explosion, I knew there was a chance you were gone. So I started trying to think of what we’d do, Nita and me.” 

Chuckles’s heart shattered. 

“I figured I could probably keep doing repairs, and maybe Grinz would let me help out at the store for some credits,” they continued. “I just needed to find a way to keep us fed until I was old enough to go into the mines. I think we could have made it work.” They turned to look at him, their eyes shining with tears. They gave him a small smile. “I’m glad we don’t have to though.”

Chuckles slid out of his chair, kneeling in front of Arni and pulling them into a tight hug. 

“I’m so sorry, Arni. I’m so sorry,” he whispered. His chest swelled with awe at the young Twi’lek and their selflessness, but the fact that they thought they were alone again, that they’d have to take care of Nita on their own tore at him. He bit back a shuddering sob, rocking Arni back and forth. He felt a damp spot form on his shirt where their face was pressed against his chest, and their fingers dug into the fabric of his shirt. 

“I’m right here, kid. I’m alright.” 

“I know. I was just scared.”

“That’s allowed.” 

After a few minutes, they released him, wiping at their nose and eyes. Chuckles shifted back in the pilot’s seat, sniffling back his own emotions. 

“Why didn’t you stay at Endi’s?” Arni asked quietly after a few moments. 

Chuckles turned his head to look at them. They were watching him intently, gathering data from his reaction to the question. And that’s when it dawned on him. 

The wariness. The hesitation. It all makes sense. 

He sighed deeply. 

“You knew, didn’t you? About her and how she felt about… about it all?”

Arni’s eyes dropped to their lap. They nodded. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

Another shrug. “You seemed happy. And you deserve to be happy.” They met his gaze. “I thought you knew.” 

Chuckles stared at them for a moment before scrubbing his hands over his face, tugging lightly at his mohawk. 

“Arni, there is no universe where I’d want to be with someone like that. That thinks like that.” He sighed again. “Whoever I’m with, I want it to be someone that I could eventually trust with our secrets. Endi and people that see the galaxy the same way will never fit that category, understand?” His voice cracked, and he did his best to keep the anger and grief he felt at bay.

They thought I’d put someone like that above them.

Arni nodded again, meeting his eyes. “Maybe you can convince her.”

Chuckles huffed at the suggestion. “Nah. I don’t want to be with someone that I have to convince that killing children was a bad idea,” he joked dryly. “Or that putting chips in me and my brothers’ heads was wrong.” He shook his head, releasing a mirthless laugh. “I just can’t believe I didn’t see it sooner. I’m such a kriffing idiot.” 

“You’re not,” Arni said quietly. “You wanted to see the good in her. And I can’t fault you for that.” They pulled their skinny legs up to their chest, wrapping their arms around their knees. “Being alone is hard. I don’t want you to feel alone, Chuckles.” 

“I’ve got you and Nita. I’ll never be alone.”

“That’s different and you know it,” they countered. “I saw how you looked at Teacher Endi. I’ve never seen you look at anyone else like that.” 

Chuckles blew out a long breath through his mouth. 

Dark curls. Sharp eyes. A twist of a smirk. 

“There was someone else that I looked at like that. A long time ago,” he said quietly. 

“What were they like?” 

He glanced over at Arni. They were watching him intently with wide eyes. 

“Only if you want to talk about them. I’d like to hear,” they added. 

Chuckles nodded, letting his mind drift back to the garages of Coruscant. 

“Her name was Brienna. We called her Bri for short. Well, Bolts mostly. She was a mechanic that worked on our ships. Deep, brown eyes that felt like she knew everything about you from just one glance, dark, wild curls that she always was blowing out of her face. A smile that could light your whole day up just before she ripped you a new asshole. Maker, she was so smart and quick. She was short, but she acted like she was ten meters tall. Took no shit from anyone.” He realized his cheeks were hurting from how big he was smiling. He hadn’t let himself think about Bri in a long time. Not really. But it felt good. 

Arni was smiling too, as if Chuckles’s joy was infectious. “What happened to her?”

The smile on Chuck’s face faded. 

“Not sure. I was going to see her on the day the war ended. We’d been seeing each other in secret, keeping it casual. She didn’t want the other pilots to think I was getting special treatment, so we didn’t tell many people. I’d promised to take her to dinner when the war was over and court her properly. And then… well, you know the rest of that story.” 

“Did you love her?”

Chuckles chewed the inside of his cheek. “Yeah. Yeah I did. Was thinking of telling her that night.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

Chuckles met Arni’s eyes again. “I’m not. I got you and Nita out of the deal.”

“But you never got to tell her.”

He sighed again, shrugging one shoulder. “That’s true. But I’d like to think she knew. And I almost hope she thinks I died. Better that than her thinking I was a child killer or a mindless drone that offered the Republic up on a silver platter.” 

“That’s still sad.” 

Chuckles tucked his hands behind his head, carefully propping his boots up on the flight console of the ship. 

“It is, but I was lucky that I got to experience love like that, kid. Not many of my brothers did. There were some that tried to make things work, but it was hard. You knew tomorrow wasn’t guaranteed, and if you found someone to share your life with, there was a good chance you might leave them behind. Not to mention a good portion of the galaxy didn’t see us as people in the first place. I was lucky to have Bri, even if it was brief and didn’t end the way I wanted it to.”

“Do you miss her?” 

Heat crept up to Chuckle’s cheeks, and his eyes stung slightly. “Sometimes,” he admitted. “When I think about her.” He looked over at Arni. “I think you would have liked her.” 

“What if we tried to find her?”

He forced a smile, touched by Arni’s hopefulness and desire to find someone that meant so much to him. But he didn’t share their optimism. 

“It’s a nice thought, but I wouldn’t even know where to start, kiddo.” He reached over and squeezed their shoulder. 

“I’m alright. I’m sure she’s moved on already. And I want her to be happy, you know?”

Arni appeared to contemplate this for a few moments. 

“You should be happy too.”

Chuckles’s smile came more naturally this time. “I will be, kid. It hurts a bit right now, but I will be happy. Don’t you worry.” 

They sat in silence for a while longer, watching the stars together. Finally, Chuckles could hear Arni’s breathing deepen, punctuated by the occasional soft snore. As carefully as he could, he gathered the Twi’lek in his arms and made his way down to the hold, doing his best not to trip over the toys that were scattered around. Nita was still dozing quietly, her trooper doll tucked close to her side. Chuckles tucked Arni back into bed gently, waiting a few minutes for the confirmation that they were still asleep, and when he heard another snore escape them, he smiled, sneaking back to the cockpit. 

It had been a while since he’d slept in the pilot’s chair, but it felt fitting tonight. He considered what he’d do with the sheets that still smelled like Endi as he retrieved the brown bottle of mystery liquor from its hiding place and sat back down heavily in the weathered seat.

Maybe just a little. There isn’t that much of it left anyway.

Sorry, Crate.

The burn of the booze felt nice and familiar, warming his insides and taking some of the edge off of his feelings. He knew he had to come up with a reason to end things with Endi, one that didn’t create suspicion or out him as an enemy of the Empire. He also knew he’d likely have to carry on the charade for a while longer. He’d acted strangely enough tonight that ending things immediately may make her suspicious. 

He hated this. 

“Now’s just not a good time for the kids. Work’s getting to be too much, especially with what just happened, and I don’t think that’s fair to you.”

No, that lets her counter it. 

“I’m not over the last person I was with. I’m not ready to move on yet. I thought I was, but I’m not.”

That could work. 

It wasn’t exactly untrue now that he thought about it. How many times had flashes of Brienna invaded his mind while he was with Endi? How many times had he almost called her the wrong name?

Maybe I was just trying to find someone to fill that space for me. But no one was ever going to be her.

Chuck glanced over at the now-empty co-pilot chair and noticed Arni had left their sketching supplies in it. Leaning over, he picked up a loose piece of flimsi and placed it on the top of their journal before reaching for a pencil. 

He started with her eyes. Those were her most striking feature, in his opinion. He could get the shape right after a few rough attempts, but never could seem to capture the light in them or the sharpness, the way they’d always felt like they were pinning him down. He moved on to her nose, which proved easier, and then her lips. He couldn’t quite get their fullness right or the permanent skeptical quirk her mouth always seemed to have, but what he finally came up with felt somewhat acceptable. The curve of her jaw was easy enough from memory; he’d touched that place on her enough to never forget it, cradling her face when he’d kissed her, running his fingers along it as she slept. 

Her ears were impossible, and he eventually compromised by deciding to cover them with her hair, but even that wasn’t right. The curls were mostly the right shape, but he couldn’t get them to sit right against her face, nor could he add the shine they always seemed to have. As his frustration grew, so did his level of inebriation, and at some point he tossed the paper and pencil aside with a huff, wrapping the blanket around his shoulders and grumbling to himself before eventually drifting off to sleep. 

Brienna’s loud cackle and brown eyes haunted his dreams. He could almost feel the rough fabric over her coveralls beneath his fingers, smell the oil and grease on her skin. 

Bri. 

Even with the concussion, Chuckles slept through the night, too overcome by exhaustion to worry about protocol. When he awoke in the morning, the paper and pencils had all been cleared away along with the empty liquor bottle.

Tag List: @redheadgirl @cyarbika @witchklng @djarrex @arctrooper69 @sleepingsun501 @ladytano420 @rexxdjarin @echos-girlfriend @zoeykallus @leftealeaf @galacticgraffiti @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall @ariadnes-red-thread @goblininawig @merkitty49 @ladykatakuri @runforrestr @baba-fett @daimyosprincess @obihiddlenox @bucketbunny99 @fordo-kixed-rex @nerd-ika @amish---paradise @arctrooperechy

#karrde writes #one step at a time #osaat #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #clone oc #twilek oc #pantoran oc #jedi oc #OC Chuckles #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Arni #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Nita #OC Nita Ayyshu #found family #angst #whump

[wild-karrde]

SO MY DEAR FRIEND @ninjigma HAS BESTOWED SOME MORE AYYSHU FAMILY ART UPON ME FOR MY BIRTHDAY AND I CANNOT STOP LOOKING AT IT/SCREAMING ABOUT IT.

LOOK AT THE BABIES. I AM SIMPLY LOSING MY MIND ABOUT EVERY DETAIL. ARNI'S BIRTHMARK AND THE STARS ON THEIR HEADGEAR. NITA'S SLIPPERS. CHUCK'S MOHAWK. I LOVE THIS, AND NIN, I CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH. THIS IS PERFECT. I AM OVERWHELMED. I AM IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION. I AM THROWING ROSES AT YOU. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

#nin I am simply overwhelmed #thank you so much #OC Chuckles #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Nita #OC Nita Ayyshu #OC Arni #OC Arni Ayyshu #clone oc #jedi oc #twilek oc #pantoran oc

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 14

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: I HAVE RETURNED AND THINGS ARE STILL HAPPENING. Please make sure to heed the warnings! As always, thank you to the wonderful @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta reading this for me!

Chapter Rating: E

Warnings: PiV sex, language, canon-typical violence, graphic description of injury, mention of suicide, character death, grief

Word Count: 8.4k words

Chuckles’s ears were ringing and everything was dark. The throbbing of his head made him fairly certain he was awake rather than dreaming, but it was hard to be sure. He could hear some sounds, but they were muted and far away, as if he was underwater, and the familiar terror at that thought was enough to snap his eyes open. They immediately stung, and he blinked rapidly, trying to clear his vision. 

The kids.

They’re safe. 

But you’re not. 

He took a deep gasping breath that burned his lungs, and he coughed hard, tasting a coating of dust on his tongue as smoke inundated his senses. He felt movement underneath him. 

Anj. Helly.

Planting his palms, he pushed himself up off of the two bodies he’d dove on top of, feeling a cascade of rock and dirt roll off of his back. He wasn’t wide enough to have completely shielded them, but the heaviness and soreness on his back made him hope he’d done enough. He blinked again, his eyes watering as he frantically tried to get the grit out of his eyes. He could just barely make out the two forms beneath him, groaning quietly. Tears streamed down his face, and he couldn’t be sure if it was purely from the smoke as he choked on another deep, shuddering breath. 

Lu.

He glanced over his shoulder. 

Where the lift and Lu had stood, there was nothing but rubble and roaring flames that were licking up any structure that was still standing. He could see most of the supports had collapsed during the explosion, and the struts that were still intact were bent, straining under their added load. The fire was superheating some of the metal, causing it to glow orange and creak threateningly. 

It’s gonna buckle and collapse the tunnel. We have to move.

Alarms were blaring loudly all around, nearly drowning out the ringing in his ears. He knew people had to be coming to help, but he couldn’t wait for them. The Imperials that were still in the mine were stranded at best, dead at worst, and right now, they were the least of Chuckles’s concerns.

A hand clamped around his arm, and his head whipped down to find Anj pushing a slab of rock off of herself and struggling to a sitting position. Blood covered her face, but her eyes were sharp as they found his through the haze. 

“Hells is hurt. We have to move. Now.”

Something about the tone of her voice, the roughness from the dust, the urgency, sent adrenaline dumping into his system and blood roaring in his ears. His training began to echo in his mind and his fingers itched to be wrapped around the controls in his cockpit as he felt the familiar surge of panic and excitement and thrill seep into his veins. 

Steady. You’re not at war. But you are in trouble.

His vision finally slightly clearer, he looked down at Helly. She was trembling and groaning, clutching at her shirt, which was soaked with blood. Her eyes weren’t all the way open, and her palor seemed off, even taking into account the layer of dust that was coating all of them. Chuckles felt his stomach flip, but he swallowed the bile rising in his throat and nodded at Anj, and the two of them began digging around the Rodian. Anj soothed Helly as Chuckles did his best to move the largest rocks and debris out of the way. 

“Where does it hurt, Petal?” Anj whispered. 

“M-my leg,” Helly whimpered. “And my stomach.” 

Anj gripped her hand tightly as she lifted her shirt. A wide gash ripped up Helly’s abdomen. Blood trickled from it, seeping into the dirt beneath her. Anj schooled her face into a neutral expression, meeting Chuck’s eyes. 

“Hurry. Careful with her leg. We’ll have to carry her out.” Her voice wavered slightly, but her expression was calm. Chuck had seen enough battle wounds to know what the calm was hiding. 

“Hang on, Hells. We’ll get you out. Chuck’s gonna get your leg free, and then we’ll get out, alright?”

“The fire,” Helly rasped. “It could hit the fluid lines. They’re filled with flammable material. Y-you can’t stay, Anj.”

“We aren’t going to stay, Petal. But we’re not leaving without you. Got it?” 

Tears trickled from Helly’s eyes as Anj stroked her cheek, but she nodded, knowing the Nautolan wouldn’t be swayed. 

Chuckles fought a wave of nausea as he finally uncovered Helly’s leg. Bone stuck out through the leg of her pants, and her boot was twisted at an angle that was just wrong for her body. And there was so much blood. More than he was used to seeing. 

For a pilot, there usually wasn’t a gruesome death to be witnessed. You were here one moment and gone the next, blinking out like a star as your fighter ripped to shreds around you. If you were lucky, the explosion took you out before your brain could process what had happened, and most of his brothers had been lucky. Crater’s body had never seemed real to Chuckles when he’d seen it, floating in the smoldering debris of the fleet. It had only been a fraction of a second that he’d caught sight of his captain, not enough and too much for him to process and accept. But Crater had been well and gone to whatever the next life held by the time Chuck had seen him, his star extinguished until Chuck could paint it on the back of his helmet. 

Chuckles considered himself lucky to be a pilot in that respect, to be able to grieve his lost squadmates but know that they likely didn’t feel a thing. He’d heard the gruesome stories from Howzer and Wolffe and the others that had fought planetside, brothers with broken bodies, screaming with their dying breaths. 

He hated to think of his brothers hurting, but somehow, seeing Helly suffer was worse. The clones were soldiers, and the harsh reality of their existence had been drilled into them from the moment they could understand the concept of death. But Helly wasn’t a clone or a soldier. She wasn’t supposed to have her body torn apart like this. She was supposed to smile gently and speak far too quickly about things she was passionate about and make Anj’s eyes twinkle in a way seemingly only she could. And yet, here she lay, trembling and leaking enough blood to make Chuckles think of his own accident with a shudder.

“Do you have something to splint with, Anj?” he asked as quietly as he could, trying not to reflexively reach for the scar on his cheek as he fought back against the intrusive memory. 

Anj’s eyes darted down to the Helly’s leg, and she sucked in a sharp breath. “There’ll be a medkit by the lockers. If nothing else, it’ll have a pain med to dull that. Stay with her, I’ll go find it.” 

“Anj, I can-”

The Nautolan shook her head, her teeth digging into her lower lip. It was obvious she was struggling with this, but she was trying to think logically instead of with her heart. 

“I know exactly where it should be, Chuckles. I’ll be faster.” 

She reached over, grabbing his hand and sliding it into Helly’s. 

“Stay with her, and I’ll be right back. Yeah?”

Chuckles nodded. “Yeah.”

Anj scrambled the rest of the way out of the rubble, her boot slipping on a few of the rocks as she clambered away. Blood was dripping off of one of her tendrils, streaming from a cut on her head. The back of her shirt also had several dark splotches on it, but Chuckles couldn’t be sure if it was her blood or Helly’s. 

A quiet whimper brought his attention back to Helly. Her fingers felt cool in his, and a spike of fear shot through him. Ripping his shirt off, he wadded it up and lifted Helly’s tunic again, pressing the fabric against the deep wound in her abdomen to try and stem the bleeding. He felt her body stiffen as he applied pressure, and she winced. Guilt tore through him, some because he knew he was hurting her, some because he hadn’t shielded her enough to keep her from being hurt like this. 

“I’m sorry, Hells,” he rasped. “It’ll only be for a little bit. Anj’ll be right back and we’ll get you fixed up and out of here.”

“You both should go,” she said quietly.

“I’m not going anywhere. And neither is Anj.”

“The kids.”

Chuck’s chest tightened at the thought of Arni and Nita.

They’re at school. Endi will take care of them until I can get there. They’ll be scared, but they’ll be alright. 

“They’re with Endi. They’ll be ok. I’ll comm them as soon as I can get out of here.” 

“You’re bleeding,” she said softly, reaching up and touching his shoulder. Looking down, Chuck saw a deep cut running along the meat of his shoulder. Some of the blood had smeared across his undershirt. Only when he saw it did he finally notice the sting of it. He shrugged, trying to smile through the pain.

“I’ve had worse. I’ll be alright.”

Helly’s gaze grew distant, and her face twisted in grief. “Lu-”

“We’ll find him,” Chuckles replied almost automatically.

Helly’s eyes met his, and he could see she knew as well as he did that there was nothing to find. More tears streamed from her eyes. “Anj knew he… but neither of us thought he’d… I can’t believe…” She shuddered and sobbed and whimpered. 

“Shhhh, Hells,” Chuckles tried to soothe. “One step at a time. We’ll get out of here, and we’ll get you fixed, and we’ll figure it all out, ok?” 

It was clear Helly wanted to say more, but tears slid down her cheeks, leaving trails in the dust on her skin, and she quietly cried. Chuck squeezed her hand, praying Anj had made it to the lockers. As if some deity was finally listening, he heard a curse and some rocks shift off to his left. Anj reappeared, lugging a medkit with one arm. Chuckles could see she was favoring the other, but he knew better than to mention it right now. He took the kit as Anj extended to it, popping it open and rummaging for a painkiller. He found the injector and handed it to Anj, looking for something to temporarily splint Helly’s leg. Anj whispered quietly to Helly before pressing the plunger against her neck, and some of the tension seemed to seep out of the Rodian’s body as the med flooded her system. Anj flung the spent injector away before taking one of the adhesive bacta patches from Chuckles, ripping it open with her teeth as she pulled up Helly’s shirt and did her best to clean around the wound. Helly wriggled, but kept silent as Anj smoothed the bandage in place. 

“Just need to get her leg put together enough to get out of here,” the Nautolan murmured, gently pulling Helly’s shirt back down. “Every medic in a fifty klick radius is going to be heading here, I’m sure.” Her grin was tight, more of a grimace, her teeth glinting in the flickering light of the flames. “You have any medical training?”

“Some,” Chuck replied, ignoring how his hands were shaking as he found bandages and a temporary splint. Helly’s blood and some of his own was smeared across his forearms, and the stinging in his shoulder was beginning to flare into a sharp throb. He bit his cheek as he extended his arm out to Anj to give her the wrap bandages. “You?”

“Some,” she echoed. “But that’ll have to be better than nothing.” Her eyes lingered on Chuck’s trembling hands, and his face warmed with shame. Anj gently reached out, taking the splint from him.

“Hold her while I do this.”

“Anj, I-”

“Chuckles.” Her eyes met his, and he saw a flicker of fear and frustration before she steeled herself. He briefly wondered if this was what she’d looked like when she’d walked away from the partner that had abused her, or when she’d walked away from her home and all she knew, but he blinked, pushing the thought away. Anj closed her calloused hands over his. “I can do this, but I need you to take care of her. Hold onto her and comfort her while I can’t. That’s what I need you to do right now. It’s important to me.”

Chuckles swallowed the lump in his throat, but nodded before moving up towards Helly’s shoulders, helping her to sit up. She gave him a weak smile, but her eyes were dim, and Chuck knew in that moment that the fire and fluid lines weren’t the only things they were racing against. 

“I’ve got you Hells. Just squeeze my hands when it hurts, alright?” He pressed her back against his chest, resting his chin on her shoulder, and she gently rested her head against his, allowing his fingers to wrap around hers.

“One… one step at a time. L-like you said,” she whispered. 

Those words had been such a boon for him in his life since the war ended, and he hoped he hadn’t worn them out just yet. 

Anj met his eyes, and he nodded, holding Helly a little tighter. 

“Yup. One step at a time.”

Anj bit her lip and pressed Helly’s leg against the splint. 

Helly screamed and shuddered. 

He’d known the pain killer wasn’t going to be able to dull Helly’s pain enough for the splint, but that knowledge didn’t stop tears from leaping into Chuckles’s eyes as he held her tightly, trying to keep her from thrashing too much as Anj quickly tried to bandage her leg, tying it firmly to the splint. 

“I know, Hells. I know. You’re doing so good. I’m so sorry. Hang on,” Chuckles said softly, trying to keep his voice from cracking as fear flooded through him. Anj was crying as she worked, tears running down her cheeks. 

“I’m so sorry, Petal. I’m so sorry. I’m almost done. I promise,” she whispered, her voice breaking on every word.

Helly whimpered, and Chuckles held her tighter as she trembled. The smoke stung his eyes, and he knew tears were leaking from his eyes as well. He cradled Helly’s head, pressing his forehead to her temple as he whispered. 

“Almost done, almost done.”

He wasn’t sure if he was reassuring her or himself as she sobbed again. 

“There. Done.” 

Anj’s shoulders slumped with relief as she sat back on her haunches and wiped at her face. 

“Alright, time to go, Hells.” 

The two of them pulled Helly to her good foot, bracing her on either side, but it only took one hobbling step for it to be apparent the three of them couldn’t pick their way over the rubble like that. A rumbling echo and menacing creaking behind them served as a warning that they were running out of whatever time they had left. Chuckles bent over, scooping Helly into his arms with a grunt. 

“Your shoulder-” Anj tried to protest, but he cut her off.

“Scout a path. I’ll be fine. I’ll follow you.”

Anj looked like she was going to argue. Chuck glanced down at Helly before meeting the Nautolan’s dark eyes with a pleading look. 

Let me do this. We’ve got to go. 

He could see Anj doing the math of it all in her head, understanding that this was the best way forward, even if that meant she couldn’t hold onto Helly for a few more moments. She scowled, and he could see her spine straighten as she nodded. Without another word, she turned, eyes scanning the uneven footing ahead of her as she carefully placed her boots, arms held out for balance. Sweat broke out across Chuckles’s brow, trickling down his temple as he tried to keep his arms steady around Helly, placing his feet where Anj had stepped and doing his best to not jostle the Rodian too much. 

It felt like an eternity had passed when they finally heard a shout up ahead. Anj glanced over her shoulder at Chuckles as if to ensure he heard it too. He nodded before taking a deep breath and yelling as loud as he could. 

“OVER HERE!” 

Anj moved quickly, shouting with a raw voice, and Chuck followed carefully behind. A moment later, two silhouettes emerged out of the murky darkness, headlamps cutting through the swirling dust and smoke. 

“ANJ! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?!?” Teef shouted. The oxygen mask he was wearing muffled his words, and his sharp eyes blinked behind his goggles. 

“Not sure yet,” Anj said flatly. Her eyes flicked to Chuckles, and she gave him a nearly imperceptible shake of her head. The message was clear. 

Not now.

“Hells is hurt bad,” Chuckles rasped, his throat suddenly feeling more raw. He noted his legs were trembling, and his shoulder felt like a hot iron was embedded in it. The second figure stepped forward, and he was relieved when Gornar took Helly from his arms with a nod. 

“They’re staging medical out front. Aside from the inspectors, anyone else in here?” Teef asked, moving aside to let Gornar past. Chuckles could see Helly’s chest was rising and falling shallowly, her eyes closed. 

“There’s no one else alive,” Anj said quietly. 

“I thought I saw Lu walk past.”

Anj’s voice broke, and Chuckles grabbed her around her waist with his good arm, holding her against his side as her knees seemed finally ready to buckle beneath her. The next words she spoke were gritted out through clenched teeth. 

“No one else alive, Teef.” 

The realization settled into the Latero’s eyes, and his gaze dropped to the ground. “Understood, Anj. I’m sorry.” He stepped aside, absently patting her arm as he took in the remains of the mineshaft, still roaring with fire and smoke. “Let’s get you two out of here, and we’ll figure out what comes next.” 

Chuckles walked slowly with Anj, allowing her to slide her good arm across his shoulders as he gripped her by her belt, holding her up. Teef went ahead, shouting for a medic and pointing out any unsteady footing. Gornar had already disappeared from view, and Chuckles hoped that meant Helly was already in the hands of a medic. When they finally reached the entrance to the mine, catching sight of Lothal’s sunshine tearing through the dust and smoke, he felt Anj release a shuddering sob, sagging against him as her grief finally overtook her. 

“I’ve got you, Anj. Almost there.” 

She didn’t reply, but he felt her grip tighten on his undershirt as they stepped forward into the clear air. Almost immediately, they were swarmed by figures, peppering them with questions. Anj slipped from his grasp, half-carried by two humans he was pretty certain were Kit and Bronce. He heard her rasp out Helly’s name as she was led away towards a set of hastily constructed tents. 

“WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED, CHUCKLES?”

He blinked hard, his eyes focusing on Jerrno, who was standing in front of him with wide, frantic eyes. 

“CHUCK?”

His head throbbed, and his shoulder seared. There was a ringing in his ears that made him flinch.

“I-”

His head swam. He looked down and finally realized how bloody he was. Some of it was Helly’s and some of it was Anj’s, but there was no mistaking the source of the crimson stream that was pouring from his shoulder. His hands were trembling.

“Lu-”

His voice faltered as relief, exhaustion, and agony all washed over him simultaneously. His knees impacted something hard, and he winced, wondering what had struck him. He realized too late he had fallen to his knees, the grit biting into his stinging palms as he tried to keep himself up.

“CHUCKLES!” Jerrno’s voice sounded so far away even though he could feel the Laterro’s hands on his shoulder and back, trying to brace him.

His vision narrowed, as if someone was closing the blinds on a window. His head slammed into something, and he tasted dirt. The last thing he saw was tan dirt that made him think of the birthmark on Arni’s face and sunlight as golden as Nita’s irises. 

Then his world went quiet.

—

For the second time that day, Chuckles started awake, but this time, it wasn’t smoke and fire surrounding him, but the soft murmur of hushed conversation and the rhythmic beeping of medical equipment. He could smell antiseptic and the distinct tang of bacta. He recognized immediately that he was in one of the tents that had been setup outside of the mine, lying on a mat on the ground. He groaned, rolling onto his undamaged shoulder. His tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth and his throat felt raw. He heard a scuffling behind him, and Grinz was suddenly hovering in front of his face with a water packet and a look of relief sweeping across his haggard features. 

“Drink,” he croaked out.

Chuckles obeyed, drinking greedily until he drained the packet and flopped onto his back, breathing heavily. 

“Fire’s out. They’ll be diggin’ for days though.” Grinz sounded exhausted. 

“Hells?” Chuckles asked.

“She’s gonna be alright,” Grinz replied, sitting down next to him heavily. “Thanks to you and Anj. If she’d had to wait for a rescue crew… well, I’d rather not think about it.” The Ugnaut scrubbed his stubby fingers over his face, and Chuckles could see him wavering between grief and confusion. 

“And the inspectors?”

Grinz sighed. “Gone. Probably immediately. Jerrno managed to get some smaller drones down the shaft, but the droids didn’t find anything alive. The explosion collapsed the entire lift shaft, and the working theory is that the inspectors were standing too close when it happened. It was quick.” 

Chuckles’s chest tightened at the revelation. 

There will be questions. A lot of them. About what we knew and if we helped Lu at all.

Panic rose in his throat.

“Grinz, my kids. I need to tell them-”

“They know you’re safe,” Grinz reassured him. “As soon as I heard the explosion, I ran down here with every bit of medical supplies I could carry. I got here just as they were carryin’ you in here, and I commed Endi to let her know. That was a few hours ago. I… I didn’t think you’d want the kids to see you like this. You’re pretty banged up.” 

“I’ve got to get to them.”

He rolled onto his side and pushed himself to a sitting position. It wasn’t easy, and it wasn’t graceful, but he managed. 

“Chuck-”

“I’ve got to get to them, Grinz,” he repeated. The Ugnaut stared at him for a few moments before poking his head out of the curtain that was keeping Chuckles separated from the main portion of the tent and waving down a medical droid. The droid bustled in, scanning Chuckles as he pushed himself to his feet. 

“I must advise against you leaving,” the droid protested. “You have a lacerated shoulder, two bruised ribs, one that may be fractured, multiple cuts and contusions, and a concussion. It would be best if you remained here so that we could monitor-”

“Is the shoulder cleaned, bacta’ed, and stitched?” Chuckles asked. 

“Why yes, but-”

“And there’s nothing that can be done about the ribs other than taking it easy, correct?”

“Limited activity is recommended, but for your concussion-”

“I know the protocol,” he interrupted again. “Had enough of them during my time as a soldier. I might know more about them than you.”

“Sir, again, I must recommend-”

“You’ve made your recommendation. You did your job. But I’m still leaving.” He glanced down at his undershirt, and swore at the dirt and blood that covered it. “Dammit. Used my shirt on Hells. I can’t let the kids see me like this.”

Grinz stood next to him. “We’ll stop by my place on the way and get you cleaned up. I’ve got a shirt you can borrow.” 

“Grinz-”

“If you’re not gonna listen to reason, then you’re gonna have to settle for lettin’ me help you,” the Ugnaut growled. “Now come on, you stubborn git.” Chuckles barely had time to mumble his thanks at the droid, who was still sputtering objections, before he had to stumble after Grinz. The Ugnaut was stomping away at a faster pace than he’d thought his stubby legs capable of.

Grinz’s shower was too small for him, but Chuckles hunched enough to make it work, allowing the warm water to run down his back for a few moments before he scrubbed at the dirt and blood that was and wasn’t his, trying to clean as much of the evidence of the day away as he could. By the time he got out, the stall was covered in a layer of grime, but Grinz waved off his apologies as he helped him back into his clothes. Chuckles knew better than to ask how Grinz had a shirt that was just his size and smelled brand new, and he allowed the Ugnaut to look him over, scrubbing away any streaks of dirt he’d missed and dabbing at one cut that reopened on his brow before putting a fresh bandage over it. Finally, Grinz stepped back, inspecting him with a grimace. 

“You still look like you got run over by a herd of bantha, but at least you smell better, I suppose,” he huffed. 

Chuck straightened, extending the hand on his good arm. Grinz eyed it before gripping it. 

“Thanks,” Chuckles said with a smile. The word felt insufficient but also like anything else would be too much. Grinz nodded, grasping his forearm. 

“Go get your kids. I commed Endi to let her know you’d be headin’ out shortly. She’s taking the kids to your ship.” He eyed Chuck again. “You need me to come with you? Can’t have you conkin’ out on the side of the road.”

“I think I’m alright,” Chuckles reassured him. “Not the worst concussion I’ve had.”

“No sleepin’ without someone checkin’ on you.”

He huffed a laugh, but didn’t object. “I won’t.” 

Grinz nodded. “Get goin’ then.” 

The walk back felt like it took an eternity, and all Chuckles could think of was getting to Arni and Nita. He was certain they’d heard the explosion at school, and if he remembered one thing about being a cadet, it was how fast scuttlebutt would spread, particularly among younger recruits who let their imaginations run wild. His blood sang and his pulse thrummed when the Starlight finally came into view. The kids must have been waiting for him because the hatch immediately flew open, and the two younglings were sprinting at him full speed in a matter of seconds. Tears blurred his vision as he took the scene in, Nita’s eyes wide and her silver ribbons bouncing, and Arni’s lekku trailing behind them as they raced towards him. He managed to kneel down carefully just before they slammed into him. Tears slid over his cheeks as the two younglings babbled, clinging to him tightly. 

“We heard about the explosion.”

“Everyone was saying all the miners died.”

“Are Anj and Helly ok?”

“What about Lu?”

He squeezed them tightly, trying to hold back the emotions that were threatening to overwhelm him. His head hurt. His shoulder throbbed. He wanted to break down then and there, but he bit the inside of his cheek, steeling himself. He buried his nose in Nita’s curls, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head before pulling Arni’s forehead to his own. 

“I’m ok. Anj and Helly are getting looked over, but I’m pretty sure they’ll be alright too.” 

He wanted them so badly to miss the fact that he’d excluded a name, but of course Arni didn’t. Their brown eyes searched his. 

“And Lu?”

Chuckles answered as honestly as he felt he could. “I don’t know, kid. He… I don’t know.” 

I don’t know anything about Lu right now. Other than the fact that he’s dead.

Arni’s face fell, but Nita appeared to be too relieved by Chuckles’s reappearance to notice the implication that Lu was gone, wrapping her arms around his neck. He carefully scooped her up with his good arm, trying not to flinch from the soreness that was settling into his body. He knew every part of him was going to be aching in a few hours, but at the moment, he couldn’t find it within him to care. 

He was alive. Still.

Arni hung close to his side as he made his way towards the ship, but they didn’t reach for his arm, clearly having noted the injury to his shoulder. 

Endi was waiting at the door when he reached it, and she inhaled sharply as she took in the cuts and bruises all over him and the bandaging on his shoulder, still apparent beneath his new shirt.

“You should see the other guy,” he joked dryly, winking at her as well as he could with the cut over his eye, but he could see it did little to alleviate her concern. He set Nita down as Endi approached, carefully cupping his face in her hands. He let his palms fall to her waist, closing his eyes and inhaling her scent. 

We’re all ok.

“Thank you for taking care of them,” he said softly. 

“Of course,” she replied, her voice cracking. “I’m so glad you’re alright. What-”

“I’ll tell you later,” he whispered, cutting her off. Her eyes sharpened, and he could see she understood there were things he wasn’t ready to talk about in front of the younglings. She smiled gently, standing on tiptoe to press a kiss to his cheek. “I’m going to let you spend time with them. Dinner’s in the reheater and should be about ready.”

“Endi, you can-”

“I know,” she whispered softly. “But they need you right now. Come by later if you want. And if not, I’ll understand.” She rested her forehead against his, her fingers slipping into his mohawk. “I’m just glad you’re alright.” 

He kissed her, stroking her cheek before letting her slip past him and out the door.

Dinner was an unexpectedly quiet affair, and for that, Chuckles was glad. Nita hummed and grunted in satisfaction through her meal as if nothing was different, but Arni didn’t seem to be able to take their eyes off of Chuckles, sneaking glances at him in between every bite. Chuckles considered asking them about how they felt, but ultimately, he wasn’t sure he was ready to talk through it with them yet. He didn’t have all of the information. His head still ached. And he hadn’t processed things himself yet. No matter how much he was trying to focus on the present, his brain kept replaying the last moments before the explosion, searching for cues he’d missed from Lu, things he could have done to change the outcome, the look in the Nikto’s eyes as he’d reached for the detonator…

“Chuckles?”

He blinked hard. Nita was looking at him expectantly. 

“Yeah, Honey?”

“Are we going to be alright?” 

Of course that was the question. They didn’t know much, but they knew something was wrong. Something bad had happened, and try as he might to hide it, he knew his guard was down and his concern was written all over his face. 

Reassure them. 

He pushed his bowl of reheated rice and meat aside and reached across the table. Both younglings took his hands, and he did his best to evenly meet their gazes. 

“A bad thing happened today, and while I’m not sure how it’s going to play out, I am very certain of one thing. We are going to be ok. Got it?” 

The two of them exchanged a glance before hesitantly nodding. He flipped his pinkies out, and Nita grinned. Even Arni couldn’t hide the hint of a smile that tugged at the corner of their mouth. 

“Pinky swear,” he rasped. “We will be ok.”

They locked their fingers with his. 

“Alright. Now the two of you go get cleaned up and get in bed. I’ll get dinner cleaned up.”

“But your shoulder,” Arni tried to counter. 

“You two have had a day. I can get it.”

Nita was more than happy to escape cleaning duty, scampering towards their shared bedroom, but Arni tapped their foot skeptically. 

“We didn’t have a mine collapse on us today.” 

“I mean, technically I didn’t either. I didn’t make it down to the mine,” Chuckles reminded them. 

They sobered, wrapping their arms around themself. “I’m glad about that.” 

Chuckles bit the inside of his cheek to keep the sudden shudder that was threatening to rip through him at bay. “Yeah, me too kid.” 

Most nights, the two younglings put themselves to bed without issue, but tonight, Chuckles came down to the hold with them, letting Nita babble about the day and allowing Arni to continue to sneak glances at him, reassuring themselves that he was there and alright. He sat down between their bunks as Nita snuggled with her trooper doll and Arni pulled the blankets up to their chin. The little Pantoran’s speech slurred as slumber quickly overtook her, her mumbled words devolving into quiet snores. Chuckles smiled at her, relieved the day’s events hadn’t affected her too much. He remembered being that age, how most of the small things seemed larger than they were, and how the bigger things weren’t always significant to younger cadets, merely because they didn’t fully understand them. Nita had seemingly never considered the possibility that Chuckles might not come home, and for that, he was grateful. 

“Chuckles?”

He rolled his head to meet Arni’s gaze. 

“Are we really going to be alright?”

He huffed a laugh, mustering a smirk that he hoped portrayed confidence. 

“Of course, kid.”

Arni tugged at a thread on the corner of their blanket. 

“Was it scary?”

Chuckles let his head thunk back against the hull’s cool metal wall and winced as his concussion reminded him of his existence. He experimentally rolled his shoulder and bit back a curse as pain shot through his muscle. 

Another scar for the collection. 

He inhaled deeply. 

“Yeah. It was scary for a bit.”

“What really happened to Lu?”

He scrubbed his hands over his face, knowing Arni was picking up every detail of his response but feeling too overwhelmed to hide it. They knew something bad had happened, and he wasn’t going to lie to them. But he also didn’t have much to tell. 

“I’m not really sure, Arni.”

They contemplated that. “But he’s dead?”

Chuckles sighed. “Yeah. Yeah he is. I’m sorry, kid.” 

Arni let out a shuddering sigh. “I’m sorry too.” 

“Let’s not tell little one though yet, yeah? She’ll find out eventually, but I’m just not sure I’m equipped with enough information to help her work through it, if that makes sense.”

“It does,” they agreed quietly. “Will you stay until I fall asleep?” 

“Absolutely.” 

It didn’t take long before Arni’s snores started to fill the silence. Chuckles didn’t immediately retreat, closing his eyes and listening to the two younglings, his kids, sleeping peacefully. He hoped they had no nightmares, that they could have as much time as possible before they learned the truth about what had happened, about what Lu had done. 

They’ve experienced so much loss and seen so much death. More than anyone deserves. But especially not them. 

His brain started working the problem, searching for an explanation. 

Helly knows something. She said as much. 

 “Anj knew he… but neither of us thought he’d… I can’t believe…”

Anj knows it too. 

He felt his brow furrow as his mind reached for pieces he couldn’t quite see the shape of. Lu had always been quiet, not outgoing but also never rude. He was kind but never offered much up about himself. In fact, the brief conversation he’d had with Chuckles and Helly just before the explosion might have been the most words Chuckles had ever heard him utter at once. But try as he might, he couldn’t find anything in all of his interactions that would point to some reasoning behind Lu’s actions. 

His head still fucking hurt. 

Checking one last time to make sure the kids were both still fast asleep, he crept up the stairs and out of the ship. The cool night air felt good against his skin as his feet carried him towards the schoolhouse as if they were on autopilot. His brain was still turning over everything when his boots hit the stairs. He was surprised when the door opened automatically, admitting him inside. 

Endi was still up, sitting at her desk. A small lamp illuminated the classroom, casting long shadows. When she looked up at him, he could see the toll the day had taken on her as well. Her dark curls hung loose to her shoulders, sticking up in every direction as if she’d been massaging her scalp. Dark circles were evident under her golden eyes, and her smile looked weary as she took him in. She powered off her datapad, coming around to the front of the desk. 

“I wasn’t sure you’d come,” she said softly as he closed the distance between them. He pulled her against him, and he felt her arms wrap around him, her fingers carding through his mohawk again. He buried his nose in her neck, inhaling deeply as his lips brushed against her skin. 

“I’ve got you,” she whispered, stroking the nape of his neck. “I’m right here.” 

His head was still hurting, but he no longer cared. Chuckles grounded himself in the feel over her, the way her pulse leapt when his lips grazed the skin of her throat, the way he could smell the sweat of the day and her perfume, the way she shuddered slightly when his breath tickled her ear, the way her fingers tightened their grip on him as he pressed closer. 

He wanted more. 

Endi seemed to understand and denied him nothing, scooting back to sit on the desk and wrapping her legs around him. 

It was almost like the first night as he kissed her, his hands reaching under her skirts as her fingers fumbled with his belt, but it was a different type of urgency, a need to have her, a need to feel alive when death had brushed past him again. He leaned over Endi as she laid back on the desk, her heels digging into his back as he pumped himself a few times before sheathing his cock in her in one stroke. 

His pace was frantic, each snap of his hips scooting the desk slightly across the floor. Every muscle in his body was protesting and pain was flaring across his ribcage, but he ignored it all, focusing on the way Endi’s eyes found his, the way she sat up, gripping the front of his shirt, the way she kept whispering to him and kissing him and touching him. 

“I’m right here.”

“I need y-you,” he stuttered out. 

“Take what you want from me. I’m yours. I’m right here, Chuckles.” 

He came once, but his cock didn’t soften, and he only allowed himself a few moments to catch his breath before he resumed his pace, relishing in the way Endi writhed and mewled beneath him and the way his spend was pushed back out of her with every thrust. Sweat trickled down his brow, stinging the cuts on his skin, but all he cared about was the way Endi felt around him, pulsing and warm and his. He wanted to get lost in her, to fuck her until he forgot everything else that had happened, and when he came again, his knees buckled underneath him. Endi caught him and managed to ease him to the floor before he just collapsed. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled in between panted breaths.

“Don’t be. I’ll be right back,” she murmured, and he wasn’t certain if he acknowledged her or not. 

A few minutes later, she returned carrying two glasses of water, offering one to him. He took it and drank greedily before sitting back heavily against the front of her desk. Endi sank to the floor beside him, resting her head on his shoulder. 

“Did that help?” she asked softly. 

“Probably not the concussion or the busted ribs, but I do feel a bit better,” he joked. 

“You have a concussion?” He could hear the worry in her voice. 

“Not my first and definitely not my worst.” It was clear the humor did nothing to alleviate her worry, but she also didn’t fuss over him further. 

They sat in silence for a few moments, their fingers slowly intertwining as they both emptied their glasses of water. He could feel her fidgeting, wanting to ask but not wanting to push him. 

“It was Lu,” he said finally, his voice feeling rough. Saying it out loud made all of the emotions of the day come running back, and he took a deep shuddering breath. He felt Endi’s eyes on him, but he wasn’t ready to meet her gaze. “Lu blew up the mine. On purpose.”

“What?” Her shock was genuine. 

Good. Word wasn’t getting out yet. 

“I’m sure there’ll be an investigation,” he continued, letting the words tumble out of him. “Two Imperial inspectors were on site. Don’t think they made it out.” 

He was tired, and his head was hurting again, but this time, with worries he hadn’t disclosed to anyone. Of course there would be an investigation. They’d want to talk to everyone, especially the clone that showed up here out of the blue, the one that was in the mine when it happened. By and large, after the decommissioning, he hadn’t heard anything about clones in the newsfeeds. It was as though they’d essentially vanished from the galaxy, and with them, any trust and appreciation the public had for the soldiers that had fought for the Republic. 

Well, the Empire now. 

Would they look into his service record? Or would they only care about what he saw that day? He didn’t know anything. But would they believe that? 

“You’re worried.” 

Of course she could see it. She knew him. And he was tired of her not knowing all of him. 

It would be so easy. I can trust her. I trusted Ry and Oks and certainly didn’t spend as much time with them as I have with her. 

It would be so much easier. To tell her. To let there be no secrets between us. 

She was a source of comfort, and he needed to lean on someone right now. Her delicate fingers stroked the back of his neck soothingly, and he finally turned to meet her gaze. Golden irises searched his for answers he didn’t have. He rested his forehead against hers, allowing his eyes to drift closed. Her other hand rested against his unmarred cheek, and he basked in its warmth. 

It would be so much easier. 

“I don’t know what Lu was thinking,” she muttered, a sudden surge of anger creeping into her voice. “He’s put you all at risk now. Jerrno and Teef’s reputation. Anj’s leadership. Everything that’s been built here, everything you fought for.” She sighed. “After everything the Empire’s done in the past year, I can’t understand why he’d do such a thing.” 

Chuckles’s eyes opened. Endi kept talking, not noticing the way he was looking at her. 

“All you and your brothers fought for, so that we could have the life we have today, and here he is, tearing it down.” Her voice had changed. She wasn’t exactly shouting, but every word dripped with venom. “All these small terrorist uprisings and wasted lives and efforts, only making it harder on those around them, destroying instead of building. What a waste.” She blinked, exhaling sharply as if to calm herself. Her voice quieted. “I hope the fact that you and your brothers were able to win the war and quash the Jedi uprising brings you some peace in this moment. You’re heroes, and the Empire couldn’t have risen without you, Chuckles. It’ll persist in spite of these ill-intentioned anarchists, and for that, I’m thankful.” 

The gears in Chuckles’s mind ground to a screeching halt as he processed her words. He was certain he’d misheard her, but the way she was looking at him was as if she’d just commented on the weather rather than the murder of children and allies, assured him he had not.

“Heroes?” he asked stupidly. “You think what we did at the end of the war was heroic?”

“Well of course. Otherwise, the Jedi may have succeeded in killing Emperor Palpatine and overthrowing the Republic. The war may have dragged on for years if they hadn’t been stopped.” 

“Children were killed,” he gritted out without thinking, confusion and anger and renewed grief ripping through him. “Jedi younglings.” He glanced at her, trying to keep his face neutral. He wanted her to take back the words, to clarify her meaning, to show him that he had misunderstood her. Surely his concussion had made his mind foggy. His head really did hurt. 

Surely this was wrong. 

Endi blinked at him with confusion, her brow furrowing slightly. 

“War is an awful business. I understand that, Chuckles. I don’t think less of the clones for doing what needed to be done.” 

What needed to be done. 

He had to keep his grip in check as his mind faltered, trying to keep himself from shattering the empty water glass between his hands. 

“I wasn’t around for the end of the war. Wasn’t planetside. Didn’t follow the order,” he mumbled aimlessly, trying to weave his way through this conversation, trying to give her any out he could. “And we weren’t really given a choice in the matter.” 

Her fingers wrapped around his, less comforting than they had been a moment before, but still sickeningly warm. She took the glass from his hand, setting it down as she clasped his hands, and he met her golden eyes, the eyes he’d stared into so many nights, getting lost in them. Now, it felt as though he was looking at a stranger. 

She thinks what we did was heroic. That having our minds turned against us was the right thing. That killing all of those people, killing younglings was necessary?

How is that possible? How could I not see it?

“Whether or not you were there for the finale, you contributed, Chuckles. The galaxy we have today wouldn’t exist without your efforts,” she insisted. “Besides, from what I understand, the chips were just an insurance policy. To ensure loyalty amongst the clones where it didn’t already exist.” 

You shouldn’t need chips that control minds to garner loyalty. And my brothers would never have done that willingly. Ever. 

His stomach curdled at that thought. He resisted the urge to withdraw his hand from hers, but he could still feel himself leaning away from her, putting distance between the two of them.  

I never really knew her at all. 

Just like Lu.

“I… I don’t know what to say,” he stuttered out.

It was true enough. She smiled warmly at him, and that soft, sweet smile sickened him now. His mind was racing for justifications, that she was just buying into the propaganda, that she didn’t understand what had actually happened, because there was no universe in which Endi, his version of her, would ever be alright with what had happened at the end of the war. This woman that sat across from him now wouldn’t have batted an eye if his children had been slaughtered, thinking it was justified, for the greater good. 

And here she sat, smiling at him. 

He’d kissed her. He’d bedded her. He might have loved her. 

“Is everything alright?” she asked. 

It felt as though Chuckles’s mouth had gone dry, his tongue a heavy leaden weight. He wanted to scream and shake her, to wake up from what was surely a nightmare. He dug his nails into his palm to be sure, and he felt a pinch of pain as they broke the top layer of skin. 

This was real. 

And now he had to be careful. He was concussed, he was hurt, he was reeling, but he couldn’t reveal anything that would condemn him or the kids. 

Endi was still watching him, concern etching her delicate features that he’d once found beautiful. “I’m sorry,” she said softly. “Today was hard enough without me ranting and raving about politics. Why don’t we go to bed?” She stood and reached for him, and before he could think about it, he recoiled. Her brows knitted together in confusion, and he internally swore at himself. 

Politics. That’s all she thinks this is. Just politics. 

For the greater good.

He tried to focus, but his brain was racing through memories he had with Endi, trying to remember if they’d ever talked about the Empire before. Surely they had. This had to be wrong. He had to have misunderstood. And then, with startling clarity in the fog of his concussion, it clicked into place. 

You made an assumption. You assumed she’d never support the Empire because she was too kind to, because how could someone so caring do that? 

And she assumed you did because you’re a clone soldier. 

“I-I don’t think I should stay tonight. The kids… they shouldn’t be alone tonight after everything,” he said hurriedly, awkwardly pushing himself to his feet while trying to meet her eyes. Her face was still pinched with confusion as she smoothed her skirts, but she seemed to accept his haphazard excuse. He forced what he hoped read as an apologetic smile into place. “Plus, not supposed to sleep much because of the concussion,” he choked out, tapping his temple with a finger. “Maybe another night.”

She nodded, unable to hide her disappointment. “Maybe.” 

Chuckles forced himself to lean down and place a kiss on her cheek. She felt stiff under his touch. She wasn’t a fool; she knew something had shifted. He could tell, and he hated that he knew that, and he feared what suspicion it might draw. 

“Thanks for helping with the kids today,” he said quietly. “And… thanks for this.”

She dipped her head. “Of course. Goodnight then.” 

“Good night,” he replied. 

She was hurt, and he wanted to fix it because he hated hurting people he cared about.

How can you still care?

Because you haven’t accepted that she’s the person you just spoke to. 

He wanted to stand there and argue with her, but he knew he couldn’t, not with the physical and mental state he was in. Instead, he stumbled back out into the night, leaving a bewildered Endi standing in the empty schoolhouse.

Tag List: @redheadgirl @cyarbika @witchklng @djarrex @arctrooper69 @sleepingsun501 @ladytano420 @rexxdjarin @echos-girlfriend @zoeykallus @leftealeaf @galacticgraffiti @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall @ariadnes-red-thread @goblininawig @merkitty49 @ladykatakuri @runforrestr @baba-fett @daimyosprincess @obihiddlenox @bucketbunny99 @fordo-kixed-rex @nerd-ika

#karrde writes #star wars #fanfiction #fan fic #the clone wars #tcw #clone oc #jedi oc #OC Chuckles #OC Arni #OC Nita #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Nita Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #twilek oc #pantoran oc #found family #angst #clone oc x oc #nsft #lemon #lemony lemon #fluff

[wild-karrde]

I MUST SCREAM AT Y'ALL FOR A MINUTE

LISTEN, THE WONDERFUL HUMAN @ninjigma JUST SENT ME THIS ART I COMMISSIONED OF MY FAVORITE LITTLE ADOPTED FAMILY, AND I MUST SHOW THEM ALL TO YOU BECAUSE I AM LOSING MY MIND AND CANNOT STOP SCREAMING.

LOOK AT THEM. LOOK AT MY BABIES. LOOK AT CHUCKLES BEING A GOOD ADOPTED DAD AND ARNI JUST DOING THEIR BEST AND NITA BEING MY PERFECT LITTLE SNACK MONSTER. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

Nin, seriously THANK YOU SO MUCH. I cannot put it into words how much I adore this, so just assume I am continuing to incoherently screech at you. (ALSO, if you need some art, HIT UP NIN! They are currently accepting commissions!)

For anyone new here, these are both scenes from my fic One Step at a Time, and Nin just brought them to life so perfectly and I could cry and I LOVE THIS AND LOVE NIN AND I WILL STOP SCREAMING EVENTUALLY, BUT NOT AT THIS PARTICULAR MOMENT.

#karrde writes #One Step at a Time #OSaaT #clone oc #jedi oc #OC Chuckles #OC Arni #OC Nita #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Nita Ayyshu #Twilek OC #Pantoran OC #found family #ART THAT I SHALL NEVER GET OVER

[wild-karrde]

Karrde's Fandom Friday Rec #1 (5/26/23)

My first rec this week has to go to @ninjigma for this art they did for my fic One Step at a Time.

We chose these two specific scenes out of the fic (from Chapters 3 and 7 respectively), and Nin just brought them to life so vividly, I'm still not over it. These two pieces are especially special to me because they're the first time I've seen Arni and Nita outside of my head, and they're PERFECT. I love these so much and cannot rave enough about them, but suffice to say NIN I ADORE YOU AND THIS ART AND AM SO VERY APPRECIATIVE FOR YOU BRINGING MY LITTLE FAMILY TO LIFE.

Also, NIN TAKES COMMISSIONS so if you're looking to get some artwork done, REACH OUT TO THEM!

Participate in Fandom Friday to show your favorite creators from this week some love! :)

#FANDOM FRIDAY #creator appreciation #art rec #fan art #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #osaat #OC Chuckles #OC Arni #OC Nita #clone OC #jedi OC #twilek oc #pantoran oc #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Nita Ayyshu #found family #THEM

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 13

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: ALRIGHT STRAP IN KIDS. Please heed the warnings on this one if you have any material you find triggering. This one is QUITE a ride. As always, thank you to the STUPENDOUS @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta reading this for me!

Chapter Rating: E

Warnings: PiV sex, language, canon-typical violence, suicide, character death

Word Count: 8.8k words

Life was good. As good as it had ever been in all the time Chuckles could remember. 

There was a comfort that came with falling into a routine. Chuckles would drop the kids off at school in the mornings, go to work in the mine, and then return in the evening to walk Arni and Nita home from school. Sometimes they’d stop by Grinz’s to stock up, sometimes Helly, Anj, and occasionally Lu would come over for dinner, and sometimes it would be just the three of them before the kids would go to bed. 

Then, Chuckles would head to Endi’s apartment. 

Those visits varied in how they started, but always ended the same: with Chuckles fucking Endi like it was what he’d looked forward to all day. Everything still felt so new and exciting, and the two of them could hardly keep their hands off one another. They did their best to fit some casual conversation in, asking one another about their day and talking about mundane things like the weather, allowing the tension to grow and blossom until it snapped. 

Tonight, Endi had invited Chuckles over under the pretense of sharing a pie she’d baked that day after school. He’d appeared on her doorstep in the dark, and she’d answered the door in a short, satiny robe that didn’t appear to have anything underneath. Chuckles had waited patiently, sitting across from her in her kitchen as she set a plate in front of him, carefully placing a dollop of fresh cream on the flaky crust. He’d eaten slowly as she watched and made idle conversation, never breaking eye contact as he licked his fork clean. 

As soon as the last crumb had disappeared and the plates had been cleared away, Chuckles had grabbed Endi with a playful growl and pulled her robe open, confirming his suspicions that she was wearing nothing underneath. She’d giggled breathlessly and he’d groaned as his hands squeezed her breasts, his lips finding the curve of her shoulder and sucking a bruise into her skin before he bent her over the table and buried himself inside of her in one stroke. The table creaked underneath them as he set a frantic pace, the legs scraping against the hard floor until the tabletop was bumping against the wall with every snap of Chuckles’s hips. He stared down at where they were joined and smirked. 

“Fuck, your pussy’s creamy tonight, Endoline,” he growled, admiring the white coating her cunt was leaving on his shaft between strokes. “Could have dipped my fingers in you and topped my pie with this instead.” His cock glistened in the kitchen light as he withdrew for a moment before slamming back into her with an echoing slap that drew a moan from her. “You think about me today, sweetheart?”

“All… all day,” she stuttered out. 

“Did you touch yourself?”

“N-no. Wanted t-to wait for you.” 

He leaned over her, caging her in as he planted his palms on either side of her on the tabletop. Some sweat trickled down the tip of his nose, dripping onto the skin between her shoulder blades. Chuckles ran his tongue along her spine, swiping away the moisture as he tasted the salt of her sweat-slicked skin. 

“Good girl,” he rasped. “Was it worth the wait?”

She shuddered underneath him. “Gods above, yes.” 

Chuckles grinned as he gripped her hips and readjusted his angle, easily finding the place inside of her that he’d become well-acquainted with over the last month and a half, and within moments, he had her coming undone beneath him. Endi collapsed on the table as he finished inside of her, barely managing to brace his palms against the wooden surface again as his cock slipped from her. Some of his spend dribbled back out from between the swollen lips of her cunt, spattering on the floor. 

“Looks… looks like we made a mess,” Endi panted with a dopey grin on her face, turning her head to meet his gaze over her shoulder. 

Chuckles huffed a laugh before leaning down to press a kiss to her temple. 

“Well then we’d better get ourselves cleaned up, huh?”

He wiped the evidence of their activities off of the floor quickly before scooping Endi into his arms and carrying her to her small refresher. It was only slightly larger than the one on the Starlight, but it did have a decent-sized bathtub pushed into one corner, which Chuckles filled with hot water before helping Endi in. Stripping off his clothes, he stepped in behind her, settling down and pulling her back against his chest. He pressed his hands to her stomach under the water, pulling her close and inhaling deeply into her hair. 

“Missed you today,” he whispered. 

This had become part of his routine too, and he enjoyed it almost as much as the sex. Almost.

“You just saw me last night,” she teased, reaching for a hair tie and starting to pile her hair on top of her head. 

“Let me,” Chuckles said, taking the thin band from her hand. Gently, he gathered her dark curls, combing through them carefully with his fingers until he had managed to smooth out the bumps and ridges in her hair. 

“You’ve been practicing,” she hummed. 

“What do you mean been practicing?” Chuckles giggled. “This is the practice. You’re far more patient than Nita will ever be. But I’ve at least gotten alright at doing buns.” 

“Are they even when you do two of them?”

“Still working on that,” he muttered, and Endi laughed in response. 

“You’ll get it.”

“And until then, I have Arni.”

Chuckles tied her hair up before leaning forward to kiss the back of her neck, squeezing her tightly again. Endi leaned back against him, sinking lower into the water so she could rest her head against his shoulder. She took his hand between hers, rubbing at some of the dust and grime that had settled into his callouses from the mine. 

“Something’s bothering you,” she noted quietly. 

Chuckles sighed. A lot of things were bothering him, but he wasn’t certain how many he wanted to burden her with. Everything had been easy so far, with the two of them still figuring one another out and how they fit together. There’d be time to talk about all of the secrets he kept locked away and the deeper topics, but at least for now, there seemed to be an unspoken agreement to just have fun with one another. He picked through his long list of concerns, choosing a more trivial one to reveal. 

“Nita’s birthday is next week,” he sighed. 

“And you’ve got it all planned well in advance,” Endi countered. “You’ve met all of her demands, and I think she’s going to be terribly excited to get her own bed.” 

After some debate, Chuckles had decided to reveal the decorated and furnished cargo hold to the younglings for Nita’s birthday. The deliveries had lined up almost perfectly with the date, and as long as Grinz could track down some bedding this week, everything would be in order. He knew the little Pantoran was going to love it, on top of all of the other gifts she was getting. A surprise would have been impossible; Nita had practically been counting the days since Arni’s birthday party, and she had very specific expectations for her own celebration. Luckily, none of them had been too far-fetched, and the only one Chuckles had said ‘no’ to was a pet tooka. Nita had been disappointed, but that had been short-lived as she’d moved on to planning the types of snacks she’d wanted, and Grinz had promised to deliver on every item. Endi had even promised to make the cream puffs Nita has become enamored with in the last few months, which may have been the real achievement that overshadowed the tooka debacle.

“You’re right,” he murmured. “As always.” He gripped her hand, pulling it to his lips and brushing a kiss over her knuckles.

“Are you nervous about telling them about us then?” 

They still hadn’t disclosed their relationship to Arni and Nita, but Chuckles knew the time for that discussion was fast approaching. Arni was starting to question where he went at night, and had even caught him sneaking home once just before dawn. They hadn’t directly asked him about it, but he didn’t want to feel like he was lying to them. He and Endi had talked about the right time to tell them, and they’d decided to do it after Nita’s birthday so as not to take away from the day. Deep down, Chuckles had also wanted to wait until after just in case the kids didn’t take it well. There was no reason to think they wouldn’t; by all accounts, they enjoyed school and liked their teacher. But he still couldn’t shake off all the nerves. 

“Not as nervous as I was, but not completely settled,” he admitted. 

“So what’s got you wound so tightly?” Endi asked, switching to his other hand and massaging his joints with her thumbs. “You feel as though you’ve got something on your mind.”

A twinge of guilt twisted his gut. 

Am I ruining my time with her? 

He rested his chin on top of her head. “I’m sorry if I’ve been distracted.”

“You don’t need to apologize. Or talk about it if you don’t want to. I just want to be supportive if I can.” 

Chuckles flushed with heat that made the water feel cool. Slipping his finger under her chin, he gently tilted her head towards him, raising her lips to his and pecking them lightly. 

“What did I do to deserve you?” 

“You’re deflecting with flattery.”

“You’re not supposed to notice that.”

“Chuckles.” 

He sighed, unsure of how to broach the topic. As well as things were going, he still wasn’t ready to tell Endi everything. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust her, it just didn’t feel like the right time yet. He wanted to wait until he was more certain of how she’d react. Finding out you were sleeping with a traitor to the Empire who happened to be harboring two Jedi youngling fugitives wasn’t exactly something that could be taken lightly. In fact, chances were good it would completely upend her life. 

The time would come where he’d be ready to tell her, he was sure of it. He felt that he owed her that honesty if things got serious enough, to the point where they were building a life together. He’d told Ry and Oks after all. But that was definitely a discussion for another day, even if that secret was connected to what was bothering him right now. 

“The one year anniversary of the end of the war is coming up,” he said quietly, choosing his words carefully. There had been rumors that the Imperials were planning a galaxy-wide holiday to commemorate the day, and the thought of celebrating at all turned Chuckles’s stomach. He couldn’t even begin to imagine how the kids felt about it. 

Endi nodded, seemingly choosing her words cautiously as well. “I imagine that was quite a day for you, even being discharged.” 

You have no idea.

“It was,” he agreed. “There’s…a lot of memories there. And for the kids, it’ll be a reminder of them losing their family.” 

“And them gaining a new one in you,” Endi said softly. “Maybe you choose to celebrate that rather than dwell on the bad memories. Celebrate the brothers that you lost and all they fought for. And celebrate your family coming together.” 

Chuckles mulled through it in his mind. It was an approach he hadn’t considered. “That’s not a half-bad idea,” he said. “I think the kids will like that.” He kissed her again, deeper this time, and he felt her quiver slightly as he pulled her close. “Thank you,” he mumbled against her lips. 

“That’s what partners are for,” she replied. 

“Is that what we are?”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but you’re my only suitor.” 

“Not the only suitor,” he countered. “There are plenty in this town that make eyes at you, whether or not you know it. And I can’t say that I blame them.”

She rolled her eyes. “Fine, then you’re the only suitor I’m interested in. And the only one I’ve shared a bed with.” She turned, straddling his lap, and he felt his cock brush her core. His hands rested on her hips as he hardened underneath her. The water lapped at the sides of the tub, disturbed from the rocking of Endi’s hips as she rubbed against his length. “You’re the only suitor that’s ever been in this tub with me, and you’re the only one I’m asking to fuck me.”

“Are you asking, Endoline?” The head of his cock caught at her entrance, and he held her still, gently flexing his hips so that the tip breached her cunt just enough to make her mouth fall open. 

“Please,” she whined. “Please take me again.”

He pulled her down onto him, spearing her on his length. Some of the water splashed over the edge of the tub, and she tipped her head back with a moan. 

“We’re going to make another mess,” she teased breathlessly. 

He leaned forward, cradling her ass as his tongue flicked against her nipple, sending another rippling shudder through her. 

“Good.”

—

“It’s PERFECT!” 

Chuckles released a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding as Nita squealed with delight, her golden eyes sparkling as she took in the party decorations. He, Endi, Anj, Helly, and Lu had gotten up incredibly early to decorate the outside of the Starlight and set up for Nita’s birthday celebration. While Chuck and Lu had strung streamers and decorations from the side of the ship, creating a sort of outdoor canopy, Endi had put the finishing touches on the baked goods she’d pulled together the night before. At the same time, Helly and Anj had snuck down to the hold to put the finishing touches on the younglings’ new bedroom. They’d managed to sneak back up to the kitchenette and brew some caf just before Nita came marching in, clearly ready to face the day. She was so excited, they’d immediately taken her outside for an inspection, which she conducted thoroughly before clapping her hands excitedly, dancing around in the dirt and giggling. 

She hadn’t wanted anything large in terms of attendance; just a few of her friends from school, Arni, and the sleepy adults that were now sipping caf with relieved smiles. Nita ran to each of them, hugging them hard and shouting her thanks. She slammed into Lu with such a force that she almost knocked the mug of caf from his hand, but he recovered, giving her one of his rare, quiet smiles. 

“Not a bad decorations job for a demolitions expert,” Chuckles joked, nudging Lu with a shoulder. 

Lu smiled quietly, shrugging his shoulders as Nita released him. Anj was more prepared for Nita’s embrace, squatting down and bracing herself as the little Pantoran flew into her arms. 

“Glad you like it, Little Star,” she chuckled, tousling Nita’s silver curls. “Now let’s go get Hells to braid your hair the way you like before everyone gets here.” 

Helly had been experimenting with different styles for Nita’s hair, and the little Pantoran seemed to love sitting while Helly’s nimble and gentle fingers wove intricate braids and patterns into her silver tresses. Today, Helly had brought some fresh flowers to weave into the braids, and Nita sat on a stool, swinging her legs as Helly worked. Arni was watching carefully, asking questions so they could try to recreate it later. Chuckles leaned against the wall, smiling into his cup as he watched his family. 

Settled. Finally.

A warm hand pressed against the small of his back. 

“Want a top off?” Endi asked quietly. 

Chuckles offered her his cup, and she emptied the rest of the caf press into it. “Thanks,” he whispered. 

“You did great pulling this together,” she said softly. 

“Couldn’t have done it without you all,” he replied. “And now, I might have a real bed to sleep in tonight for the first time in a year.” 

“That reminds me. I’ve got something for you.”

Chuckles raised an inquisitive eyebrow, but Endi beckoned him back to the kitchenette. He followed, setting his mug on the small countertop. Endi crouched down, digging in her bag until she pulled out a parcel that was wrapped with ribbons. She handed it to him with a small smile.

“For you.”

“It’s not my birthday.”

She shrugged, and he smirked before opening it. Inside, there were two sets of sheets, and when he ran his thumb over the fabric, Chuckles knew it would be the softest thing he’d ever slept on. One set was a dark red and one a light blue, and he glanced up at her. She ducked her head shyly.

“Consider it a housewarming gift. Well, I guess a bedwarming…” her voice drifted off, and she flushed as she realized what she’d said. 

Chuck glanced out the door for a moment, confirming no one was paying attention before he closed the distance between them, pinning her against the table she was leaning against. His knuckle slipped under her chin, and he grinned as the purple flush in her cheeks grew deeper, highlighting her freckles. 

“I’ve got a better idea of how you can warm my bed, Endoline. Not that I don’t appreciate the sheets.” 

“Chuckles,” she gasped, her voice hitching slightly as he nuzzled against her throat. 

“I may save these until the first time you sleep over, so we can break them in together,” he rasped into her ear, her curls tickling his nose. He felt her shudder as his hand slid around the back of her neck. He pressed his lips against her pulsepoint and felt it hammering. He grinned. 

“Endoline, I-”

“Nita’s asking if you’re ready to go outside and play games.”

Endi and Chuckles flew apart. Endi turned her back, straightening her clothes and smoothing her hair, trying to hide her face. Chuckles met Arni’s gaze, trying to ignore the heat in his cheeks as he hurriedly wiped his mouth. The young Twi’lek’s gaze flicked between the two of them, and they ducked their head. 

“Yeah. That’s great. We’ll be right there, kid,” Chuck managed, suddenly feeling winded. 

Arni nodded, turning and hurriedly making their exit. Chuckles could hear everyone else exiting the ship, and when the noise faded with their departure, he turned and met Endi’s eyes. The two of them burst into nervous giggles at the same time, Chuckles rubbing his neck as Endi covered her face to muffle her laughter. 

“I think it’s safe to say we’ve been found out,” she said, her voice muffled behind her hands. 

Chuckles smiled, pulling her hands from her flushed face and resting his forehead against hers. 

“If anyone was going to figure it out, it was going to be Arni anyway.” He sighed, letting out a nervous giggle of his own. “Seems like it might be time to let them both in on the secret.” 

Her golden eyes searched his. “Are you alright with that?”

“Yeah,” he said quickly. He brought her hands up to his lips, kissing her knuckles. “No more hiding?”

“No more hiding,” she agreed. “But let’s wait until after the party. I don’t want anything to take away from Nita’s day.”

Chuckles grinned, but something about the way Arni had looked at the two of them was nagging at him. He buried it quickly, taking Endi’s hand and leading her outside. 

—

The party went off without a hitch. By the end of it, Chuckles was almost worried Nita wouldn’t stay awake long enough to see the new bedroom. Her eyelids were drooping as she bid her guests farewell, but she wore a satisfied smile. His heart warmed as she made the rounds again to thank everyone that had helped set things up, and he could see her confusion when they didn’t leave along with her friends.

“Better move fast or she won’t be awake to appreciate it,” Anj teased him with a nudge. 

“You’re right,” he agreed. He roared playfully, scooping Nita into his arms, and she squealed with surprise, breaking into a fit of giggles. 

“Can’t go to sleep yet, Honey. We’ve got one more surprise for you. Arni too.” 

The Twi’lek paused mid-bite of a creampuff, eyes widening in curiosity. 

“Come on,” Chuck said, reaching an arm out for them. “Let’s go show you before little one nods off.” Arni slipped under his arm, and the three of them headed back into the ship, followed by Lu, Anj, Helly, and Endi. 

Chuckles felt Nita stiffen when she figured out where they were going. 

“That place is scary, Chuckles,” she murmured. 

“It’s not as scary anymore,” he replied, keying the unlock code to the door. “Chased out all the ghosts with Anj.” 

“You promise?”

He offered her his pinky, and she took it, interlocking it with hers. Chuckles set her on the floor, and he could see her steeling herself as the door hissed open. He nudged her inside, pulling Arni in behind them before slapping on the lights. 

All of Nita and Arni’s nerves evaporated, immediately replaced with wonder as the glass decorations glinted in the light cast by the strings that were woven back and forth over the ceiling of the hold. Nita ran to the edge of the railing, looking down into the new bedroom. Two bed were pushed against the opposite walls with their own sets of sheets and pillows. The middle had a large rug, already covered with the gifts Nita had received at her party. Lu and Helly had quietly whisked them away and set them up while Nita was distracted. 

It was apparent which side was meant for which youngling. One had a small desk with Arni’s colored pencils, journals, and datapad neatly placed on its surface. On the shelves above their bed sat several specimens Helly had donated after noting Arni’s interest in them. The stone Endi had given them was placed on the nightstand next to the bed. Nita’s side was decorated with flowers and stars that hung over her bed in an array. A small cupboard that Lu had built sat against the wall, the inside stocked with some of her favorite snacks. Her trooper doll laid against the pillow. Lu had also built matching sets of drawers, which contained the sets of clothing that they’d accrued during their time together. Chuckles had worried that the large space would seem sparse, but the sheer joy on the two younglings’ faces put his face at ease. He owed more favors than he could count and would be paying Grinz back through odd jobs for a while, but it was all worth it. 

“Is… is this ours?” Arni asked hesitantly. 

“All yours,” Chuckles confirmed. “Room for you two to grow into. And no one will be elbowing anyone else or leaving crumbs in the other’s sleeping space.” 

Arni’s arms were around him in an instant, their face buried in his chest as they hugged him hard. Nita wrapped herself around his right leg, stepping on his toes in the process, but he couldn’t be bothered to care as he hugged them both back. 

“Anj, Helly, Lu, and Endi all helped with this. Grinz too,” he said. “Couldn’t have done it without them.” 

The two younglings immediately flew to the other adults, thanking them and hugging them. Chuckles watched Arni and noted they were a little stiff when they hugged Endi. 

Probably just because they caught us earlier. Maybe telling them both will ease that tension so Arni doesn’t feel like they need to keep it a secret.

“Well, let’s not all stand here gawking. Let’s go get your stuff out of the old bed so you can put it in your new room!” Anj crowed, and the two younglings were off like a shot, squealing as they raced back down the hallway. 

They spent the next hour moving the children into their new room, Anj and Lu helping while Helly and Endi put things away and Chuck showed them all the new items with pride. The adrenaline was short-lived for Nita, and Chuck could see her eyeing her new bed. The other adults took their cue, bidding the kids one last good night before filing out. Chuckles caught Endi’s eye from across the room, and she nodded, giving him a wink. 

Now’s as good a time as any I suppose.

Chuckles waited until it was just him, Endi, and the younglings. He could see Arni glance between the two of them nervously. Nita was too busy cataloging her snacks to notice anything out of the ordinary. 

Chuckles cleared his throat. 

“I… I’ve got something I’d like to tell the two of you, if that’s alright.”

Nita turned to look at him, her hand already in a bag of Cinnamon Poppers. Arni straightened.

“I know at least one of you has already pieced this together, but I wanted to be upfront about it. Now that it… well, it seems to be going well.” He was suddenly nervous, and Endi came to his side. Her presence calmed him, and he felt her hand on his back again. He wet his lips and continued. “You two are my family, and it’s important to me that we’re honest with each other about things, so I want you to know if there’s another person that’s important to me.” He let his hand slide down and find Endi’s as he turned to meet her gaze. “And in the last few months, Teacher Endi has become pretty important to me. We’ve been spending some time together, and I’d like to spend more with her around the two of you. If that’s alright.” 

Nita’s eyes were wide as she chewed her snacks. Arni was still watching the two of them carefully. 

“Are you in love?” Nita finally asked. 

Chuck’s face felt hot as he fumbled for words. “I… we… well…”

“Your father and I are still figuring out how we feel about one another,” Endi cut in. “It’s still early, but we care very much for one another. I like him quite a bit.” 

Chuckles shot her a grateful look, and she winked at him, squeezing his hand gently in reassurance.

He turned to face the younglings, his family. His palms were sweating. “So?”

Nita stared for a moment before breaking into a fit of excited giggles. She ran forward, hugging Endi tightly around the waist. Endi didn’t hesitate for a moment, hugging her back. Chuck turned to Arni. When they saw him looking at them, they hurriedly stepped forward and hugged Endi as well, just as stiffly as earlier. Chuckles’s brow furrowed in concern. 

If Endi noticed, she didn’t say anything. As the younglings shuffled off to get ready for bed, she turned to Chuckles. 

“Thank you for a lovely time. And for this.” 

“You’re not staying?”

She smiled, resting her hand against his cheek. “You’ve just dropped a lot on them. I think seeing me at breakfast would be rather jarring, don’t you?” 

He huffed, resting his forehead against hers. 

“You’re pretty smart, you know that?”

“It’s a requirement for the job,” she teased. Standing on her tiptoes, she kissed his cheek. “Good night, Chuckles.”

“Good night, Endoline.” 

The two younglings returned as Endi slipped out the door, and Chuckles tucked them both in. Nita was asleep before her head could even warm the pillow, her trooper doll tucked under one arm. Chuckles waited until she was snoring to sit next to Arni on their bed. They had their light still on, their latest sketchbook balanced on their knees. As Chuckles sat down beside them, he caught a glimpse of Anj’s sharp teeth and Helly’s bright eyes, easily recognizable as Arni depicted them, carefully shading each of Anj’s tendrils. 

“That from today?” 

They nodded. “They seemed really happy. Like you and Endi.” 

Chuckles scooted closer until their shoulders were touching. “I think they are. But that’s still a secret.” 

Arni nodded again but didn’t say anything. Chuckles felt himself grow nervous again. “Are… are you happy about this kid? You seem like something’s on your mind.” 

Their pencil paused on the page, and he could practically hear the gears turning in their head. “It was just… I didn’t expect it, I guess. And I don’t think I ever considered what it would be like if you had someone. Not th-that you can’t. I want you to be happy. I just never thought about what it would feel like.”

“How does it feel?”

They finally looked up at him. “Just… different. Something to get used to.” 

There was something that they weren’t saying. Chuckles wasn’t sure if they just couldn’t articulate it correctly or if they didn’t want to, but either way, he knew better than to push. Arni would come around in time if they felt it was important enough to share. His heart fell slightly, his worries not really assuaged. 

Endi was right to go home. The kid needs some time to adjust. Maybe we all do.

“Are you happy?” 

Arni’s question surprised him, and when he looked at them again, their brown eyes were wide, expectant, watching him carefully. 

“I am,” he replied. “And not just because of Endi. But she is a factor in that.” 

Arni nodded, clearly turning the information over in their mind before reaching a conclusion.“Then I’m happy for you, Chuckles. You deserve to be happy.”

“Are you happy, Arni?”

They gave him a small smile. “Of course.” 

The way they said it, as if it were a given, unsettled Chuckles slightly. It felt like they were satisfying an expectation rather than being honest, but the young Twi’lek had already turned back to their sketchbook, their pencil scraping across the drawing once more, clearly considering the matter settled. 

The won’t want you to push. Something to keep an eye on. Another conversation for a different time.

Chuckles ruffled their lekku before pulling them into a hug. “G’night, kid. Don’t stay up too late.” 

“Night,” they replied. 

Chuckles shuffled up the stairs and to the bunk, unwrapping the light blue set of sheets. As he shook them out, he was immediately inundated with the familiar, gentle scent of vanilla and perfume. Bringing the sheets to his nose, he inhaled deeply, grinning into the fabric. 

They smelled like her. 

A scrap of flimsi fluttered to the floor from where it had been tucked into the folded sheet. He picked it up, his smile widening as he read the words. 

When they stop smelling like me, let me know. I’ll come over and renew it so you don’t miss me. 

- Endi

—-

The one year anniversary of the Republic’s fall, or Empire Day as it was apparently being called, approached faster than Chuckles could have anticipated. As predicted, the galaxy was preparing celebrations to mark the day. Many of the miners and their families were planning to head into the nearby capital city to observe the celebrations. Endi had tried to get Chuckles to go, thinking that the ceremonies and parades would give the children better memories, but when he’d still declined, she’d been understanding. He’d pushed her to go on her own, not wanting to weigh her down or make her feel like she had to stay behind because of him, and he was relieved when she finally relented. 

“Just don’t let any of your other suitors charm you while you’re up there,” he teased in bed one night as they lay snuggled together. It was the third time she’d slept on the Starlight and the first night they’d had the ship to themselves, Arni and Nita being out stargazing and camping with one of their classmate’s family. Chuckles and Endi had taken full advantage of the quiet, and now lay curled around one another as the sheets stuck to their sweaty skin. 

Endi pushed her curls out of her eyes to poke him in the ribs. “How many times do I have to assure you that you’re the only one I’m interested in?” she teased. 

“Yeah, but I’m also the one being the downer about the celebration.”

“I told you already; I understand. Take care of Arni and Nita. We’ll have time when I get back.”

His chest had bloomed with warmth before he’d rolled Endi underneath him and taken her again. 

How did I get so lucky?

He prayed to whatever deities were listening that luck would be on his side again today, the one year anniversary of his world and Arni and Nita’s being turned on its head. Chuckles was terrified of saying the wrong thing, of mentioning something that would rip old wounds open. The kids hadn’t said anything to him, but he had noted a slight stoop to Arni’s shoulders, as if the weight of the day had slowly grown as it approached. Nita still bubbled about, but there was something that seemed forced about it, as if keeping a smile on her face would keep everything else she was feeling at bay.

It would clearly be impossible to just pretend it was a normal day. The town was mostly empty, school canceled in observance of the “holiday”. Most of their friends had disappeared with their parents to the city to watch the parades. The mine was closed as well, and most of the miners had left to join the celebrations as well. 

The kids woke, ate breakfast, and then went outside to play. Chuck felt as though he was going through the motions, showering, making caf, and settling into the seat to watch the kids out of the front viewport. 

I can’t believe it’s been a year.

The younglings both looked as though they were putting up a good front for one another, but after all of their time together, Chuckles could easily see the weight on their shoulders. Nita’s smiles were half-hearted at best, and Arni seemed so weighed down, it looked like they might topple over at any moment. He thought about what Endi had said about how to frame the events surrounding that day. It wasn’t a bad idea, but he felt that he should save it for if things got dire, the eject handle if emotions ran high. He wasn’t certain how the two younglings marked the anniversary in their minds. He’d tried to remember how he’d thought of major changes as a cadet, but everything had been a milestone, another step towards becoming a soldier. Life on Kamino had been controlled, no days truly unpredictable.

Well, at least until a Jedi had shown up looking like a drowned tooka in his soaked robes and sopping hair, asking questions that had sent rumors rippling through the ranks. 

But even then, it was noteworthy because of its strangeness, not due to anything traumatic. All of that would come during the war, but when the fighting started, every moment of note felt like one of grief. 

Except for TP winning that homebrew contest in the barracks. Except for that time Crater told me he considered me his second in command. Except for when Howzer got promoted. 

Except for when Brienna kissed me for the first time in the cockpit of my Headhunter. 

He huffed into his caf. 

More than enough bad, but plenty of good sprinkled in too. 

He realized that was what had kept him going, the little bits of good in all of the bad. And he knew then that the conversation with Arni and Nita couldn’t wait. 

That day was simultaneously terrible and great because I found them. And I need them to focus on the good rather than wallowing in the bad memories and letting them weight them down. We can grieve, but I also don’t want them to get stuck in it. 

Like I did after I lost Crater and most of my squad. 

Tipping the last dregs of his caf into his mouth, he went to place the empty cup in the kitchenette. When he turned, he found the two younglings trudging inside. 

“What’s wrong?”

“Too cold,” Nita muttered. Arni was silent, clutching their journal. 

“Alright, family meeting,” Chuckles declared, sitting at the small table. The two younglings stared at him for a moment before shuffling onto the bench across from him. Brown and golden eyes watched him expectantly. He could see the sadness there, and it made his heart clench and strengthened his determination to take some of their weight.

“I figure let’s talk about the bantha in the room. We’re all thinking it. And I don’t want us moping around all day because of it. Today’s hard.” 

He internally cringed, feeling like he was a captain giving a pep talk to his ranks. That wasn’t how he wanted to do this. Leaning forward, he reached his hands across the table, palms up. It took a moment, but Nita and Arni both reached out and gripped his hands. 

“It’s hard, remembering what happened to us a year ago. It was awful, and every day I wish I could take that burden from you two. But I want you to know that I’m also grateful for some things that happened that day.”

“Like what?” Nita asked.

“Well, I’m glad Arni didn’t stab me with their lightsaber,” he started, and a hint of a smile tugged at the young Twi’lek’s lips. “I’m glad you both trusted me enough to come with me. I’m glad my chip didn’t activate and I was able to get the two of you out.” He squeezed their hands. “But above all, I’m grateful that I survived long enough to find the two of you. That we became a family. That we chose a name and have survived together. We’ve made a life for ourselves.” His voice cracked unexpectedly. “I had a family, but I always wondered what it would look like after the war, if all of my brothers would go their separate ways and I’d be left alone. I’m glad I’m not. I’m glad I have the two of you.” 

Nita sniffled, hopping off the bench and coming around to climb into Chuckles’s lap and throw her arms around his neck. 

“There was so much scary stuff that day. And I’m glad you found us too. And that Arni didn’t kill you.” 

Chuckles looked over the top of Nita’s head at Arni. They had tears running down their cheeks. 

“Hey,” he said softly. “It’s ok to feel sad. Or angry.”

“It’s just… how can they celebrate?” Arni whispered. It was the angriest he’d ever heard them. “Our friends were killed. For nothing. The Empire is tearing down everything the Republic built. How can we celebrate that?”

“Come here, kid,” Chuckles said quietly, scooting to the end of the bench. Arni came around the table, close enough to where Chuckles could awkwardly get an arm around them as well. He touched his forehead to theirs and then Nita’s. “There’s a lot of bad, but I want today to be a day for us. So, we’re not celebrating the Empire, we’re celebrating the day we became a family. I think that’s worth commemorating. What do you think?” 

Arni wrapped their arms around his chest, resting their head on his shoulder. “I think I’d like that.” 

“How do we do that?” Nita asked. 

“Well, we play games together. We eat good snacks. We talk about the good things that have happened as a family. Our favorite memories. And, if you feel like it, we talk about your friends and my brothers and keep their memories alive. Can we do that?” 

“I’d like that,” Arni said, wiping at their cheeks. 

“I’LL GET THE SNACKS!” Nita yelled, squirming out of Chuckles’s grip and sprinting off to retrieve her bags from her stash in their bedroom.

Arni leaned against Chuckles’s arm. “I’m glad you’re our family. I know people call you our dad, but how do you feel about that?”

Chuckles thought about it for a moment. It was something he’d been kicking around in his mind a lot as well. “I think that whatever feels right to you is what we can use. Whatever happens, you’re my kids, even if we don’t share any DNA. And that doesn’t have to be in a fatherly way if you don’t want it to be. I can be a weird uncle or just the guy that’s the oldest here. Whatever feels right.” 

Arni nodded. “I don’t remember what it was like to have parents, not really. I came to the temple when I was really little.” They chewed their lip. “I don’t know if I’ll ever call you ‘dad’, but I think you do feel like one, if that makes sense.” 

Chuckles smiled. “That works for me.”

Nita returned, tossing about five bags and boxes of snacks on the table. 

“Ok, so what’s your favorite memory?” she demanded, scooting back onto the bench and reaching for the Spice Snappers. 

Chuckles glanced at Arni, who thought for a second before breaking into a wide grin. “I’ve got a few, but one of them has to be when Nita beat you at hide and seek.”

The memory made Chuckles laugh out loud. When they’d been flying to Lothal, Nita had gotten bored and demanded they play hide and seek in the Starlight. Chuckles had felt confident, knowing there were only about three places in the ship that she could hide on her own. 

Apparently, she’d found a fourth. In the ceiling panels. 

Chuckles had been frantic, knowing there was no way she could have disappeared off a starship mid-hyperspace, and yet, she was nowhere to be found. He’d grabbed Arni by the shoulders, trying not to let his fear force him into yelling. 

“Ok, so, there are only a handful of places she could be on this ship, and she’s in none of them. I know you know where she is. You have GOT TO TELL ME WHERE SHE IS, ARNI.”

A giggle had erupted from the ceiling, and Chuckles’s eyes had snapped up to a grate where two golden eyes were peering down at him. 

“Kriff.”

“That’s a bad word,” she’d giggled. By the time they fished her out of the duct, she was covered in dust and cobwebs, but triumphant, declaring herself the galaxy’s greatest hider. 

Chuck didn’t disagree. 

That seemed so long ago, but Arni’s guffaws still rang fresh in his ears. Now, they were smiling and suppressing more giggles as they did an imitation of him. 

“You have GOT TO TELL ME WHERE SHE IS, ARNI,” they mocked playfully.

“That’s a good memory,” Chuckles agreed. “But I don’t sound like that.”

“Yes you do,” Nita argued. 

“Agree to disagree. Ok, what’s yours Nita?”

She pondered for a moment. “Swimming with you. And finding my crystal. I was glad you all were there. It made it feel more special.” She popped a snack into her mouth, which crunched loudly. “What about you?” 

Chuckles smiled. “I’ve got a few. Picking a name. Seeing you guys have your birthdays and get older. The looks on your faces when you saw your new room. Watching you run after that tooka the first day we were here.” He paused, realizing he’d cataloged more memories than he initially thought. 

Because they all feel special. 

Because they’re your kids and you love them.

His throat felt tight suddenly, and he reached into the Spice Snapper bag, popping one into his mouth. Nita was gleeful, Arni looked concerned. Chuck felt the heat overwhelm him and let the tears that were already there leak out of his eyes. 

“Woooo. Still hot. Thought I might have a tolerance for those.” 

“Maybe if you eat more,” Nita offered. 

Chuckles coughed hard, fanning his face. “Yeah. Maybe.” 

—

After Empire Day, it felt as if things settled even more for Chuckles. Sure, Endi was a new component of his life that he was sharing with the kids, but they adapted quickly. Arni still seemed stiff around her, but they were polite and engaging, and he appreciated that. He still hoped that they’d come around, but he wasn’t going to push them. 

It took them time to come around to you. They deserve that time to adjust to having her around.

The air chilled as the days shortened, and the weeks moved along at a steady pace, every day predictable to the point where any deviations from what was expected were noticeable, no matter how small. So when Chuckles arrived at the mine one afternoon, it was immediately apparent to him that someone was missing from their crew. 

“Where’s Lu?”

In all the time Chuckles had worked at the mine, he’d never known the Nikto to be so much as a minute late. Having him be completely absent was nearly unthinkable.

Helly fidgeted nervously at her locker, as Anj replied stiffly. “Took today off. He’s uh… having some family issues.” 

Chuckles nodded, pulling his gloves on. “That sounds…not good.”

Anj shrugged, but he could see the tension in her spine and an exhausted slump in her shoulders. It looked as though she hadn’t really slept. “Just needs some time to address it. Told him to take as long as he needs,” she said quietly. Finishing strapping the sensor on her ankle, she straightened, brushing off her coveralls and reaching into her locker for her tendril wrap, clearly considering the matter settled. 

She seemed off. Helly seemed worried. Something was bothering them, and Chuckles couldn’t tell if he was just looking for problems or if there actually was one. In the weeks since Empire Day, things had chugged on quietly. Too quietly. 

You’re just trying to find problems when there are none. You need to relax. The war is over, he tried to tell himself. But he still couldn’t fight that nagging feeling that something more was going on today. 

The lift appeared inside the gate at the far end of the tunnel with a metallic shriek that made Chuckles wince slightly, the doors grinding open to release the previous shift. Chuckles spotted Teef among them, making notes on his datapad and chuckling at something the man next to him was saying. They stopped by the lockers, some chatting with Anj or Helly before moving on. Chuckles nodded at a few of them as they went by. He’d come to know some of the other miners in these brief interactions where they passed each other, but most days, they never had time for more than a quick exchange before he headed down and they headed home. 

Anj slammed her locker shut, jogging to catch up with Teef to chat with him about something just as a heavy hand landed on Chuck’s shoulder. “Made sure to save the hard work for you,” a gruff voice snickered. Chuckles turned and grinned at the Devaronian that had appeared. 

“Sounds like Teef is paying you too much, Gornar,” he replied with a grin.

The Devaronian tipped his head back and cackled loudly. “I’m sure he’d agree with you.” He squeezed Chuck’s shoulder. “Been a while since we’ve crossed paths. Kids good? The little one like her party?”

“She loved it, but not as much as the new room she got out of it. Both of them have spent every spare second down there decorating it with whatever they can find. Arni’s going to have one of every specimen down there before the year is out.” 

Gornar chuckled. “I’m glad.” He leaned closer, glancing around before speaking quietly. “You’ve got some Imp inspectors down there today.”

“Inspectors? Didn’t think we were due for them for a while,” Chuckles noted with a raised eyebrow.

“We aren’t, but they’re here regardless. They don’t seem to be ones for humor either, so I’d stow the jokes and just keep your head down today.”

Chuckles feined offense. “Me? Joke? At work? Never.” 

Gornar’s smile faded, his expression growing more stoic. “I’m serious, Chuck. Not sure what’s afoot, but they took a lot of notes in their little datapads. Just don’t get yourself on anyone’s shit list if you can help it.”

“No promises,” Chuckles grinned. “But thanks for the heads up. I shall endeavor to behave.”

The Devaronian appeared to find that acceptable, grinning with sharp teeth. “Good man. I’ve got to get going. Promised Zeex I’d cook tonight. Stay safe down there today.” 

“Always,” Chuckles grinned, watching as the Devaronian jogged off, catching up with the rest of his crew as they made their way out of the shaft. Turning back to his locker, he reached for his helmet. 

“Is… isn’t that Lu?” Helly said quietly from next to him. 

Chuckles leaned out, and sure enough, he saw the Nikto walking towards them. 

“It is.”

Lu had his head down, not meeting anyone’s gaze, but his pace was hurried. He wore a heavy coat that reached to his ankles, one Chuckles hadn’t seen before. It struck him as slightly odd since the week had been uncharacteristically warm.

“Thought you weren’t gonna join us today!” Chuckles called, thinking of Anj’s words and trying to make it sound light. Lu slowed, finally raising his head to meet Chuck’s gaze.

“Felt like I should be here,” he said evenly.

Chuckles stepped closer. “Anj said you’ve got some family stuff you’re dealing with. If you need to take time, we can handle it.” He rested his hand on Lu’s shoulder, and the Nikto flinched away. 

Anj had paused her conversation with Teef and was looking over at them with a concerned expression. 

“Lu?” she asked, her confusion evident.

Lu glanced at her but did nothing else to acknowledge her remark. 

“I needed to be here,” he repeated quietly. 

Chuckles nodded. “If work’ll help, I get that.” He knew as well as anyone that sometimes throwing yourself back into a task could help distract from worries or grief. “Glad to have you, then.” 

Lu met his gaze again, and his eyes were sad, but something else was lurking in them that sent a shiver down Chuck’s spine. “You’re a lot of the good in the galaxy, Chuckles. You take care of people, even if you owe them nothin’. That’s hard to find nowadays.” His voice was odd, but Chuckles couldn’t pinpoint why. Lu reached out and patted him on the chest just above his breast pocket. It was strange, but everything about this encounter was, and Chuckles had no idea how to react.

“And Hells,” the Nikto continued, turning to the Rodian standing next to them,“if I could bottle your exuberance, I would. Don’t ever lose that, you know?” 

Helly stared at him for a moment before nodding. “I won’t. Are you sure you’re alright, Lu?” 

“Good. That’s good,” he replied, ignoring her question. Seemingly satisfied with the exchange, he dipped his head. “I’ll be seeing you.”

With that, he turned and strode off directly towards the lift, his pace somehow faster now, more determined. Chuckles watched him warily. There was something about his tone of voice that was irregular for the Nikto, yet oddly familiar, something that caused the hairs on the back Chuck’s neck to stand straight up. 

“Wait, Lu! You need your helmet at least!” Helly called after him.

Lu ignored her, continuing past the checkpoint and striding towards the lift. It was then that Chuck realized what was familiar about the tone of his voice. 

It was the resignation, the consignment to defeat, the finality. He’d heard it in Crater’s voice, just before he’d ordered him to run, knowing the fight was lost, knowing it was the end. 

Knowing he was about to die. 

He whipped his head around to look at Anj. Teef was leaving the shaft, and the Nautolan was making her way towards him with long, quick strides. Her dark eyes were focused on Lu’s back, confusion and concern clear in them.

“Anj?” Chuckles’s voice sounded small. He wanted to be wrong, but when he looked at Anj, he could see she was scared. Something had shaken her. Knowing everything he did about Anj, everything she'd survived, the understanding that she was rattled sent a cold spike of fear shooting through him. 

Something was very wrong. 

A flash of understanding dawned on Anj’s features. Her dark eyes widened in horror. 

“Oh, kriff,” she breathed, breaking into a sprint. 

“What’s going on?” Helly asked. 

Lu turned to face them, and Chuckles’s heart pounded in his ears as the Nikto pulled back his long, heavy coat, revealing a glittering array of thermal detonators strapped to his chest. His expression was sad, but determined as he raised a detonator in his hand, his thumb poised on the trigger.

“ANJ! STOP!” Chuckles screamed. He lunged towards her, just managing to grab her by her arm as she passed him and wrenching her back towards him. “FUCK! LU! NO!” Anj shouted, her voice breaking as she struggled in Chuckles’s grip, still trying to get to her friend. Chuck managed to keep his hold on her and tackle Helly to the ground, doing his best to shield them both underneath his body as the mine erupted in a roar of flames and smoke.

A/N: Sorry. You all called it that I'd let things be chill for too long. Also, TP (aka Two-Pint) is one of @teletraan-meets-jarvis's OCs, which you can learn more about in her fic "Pieces."

Tag List: @redheadgirl @cyarbika @witchklng @djarrex @arctrooper69 @sleepingsun501 @ladytano420 @rexxdjarin @echos-girlfriend @zoeykallus @leftealeaf @galacticgraffiti @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall @ariadnes-red-thread @goblininawig @merkitty49 @ladykatakuri @runforrestr @baba-fett @daimyosprincess

#karrde writes #one step at a time #osaat #star wars fanfiction #the clone wars #tcw #post order 66 #clone oc #jedi oc #OC Chuckles #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Arni #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Nita #OC Nita Ayyshu #found family #angst #fluff

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 9

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: IS THIS THING ON??? OK HI HELLO I HAVE RETURNED WITH THIS FIC AND I KNOW I ALWAYS PROMISE THIS, BUT I PINKY SWEAR THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL NOT TAKE AS LONG (in fact, I already have a good chunk of it written). I'm super excited to introduce some new characters (and also maybe make a reference to a certain mechanic that I haven't yet named in this series). But anyway, I AM VERY EXCITED FOR THIS CHAPTER AND I HOPE YOU ALL LIKE IT. THANK YOU as always to the wonderful @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta-reading this for me and helping me hash out characters and plot and just generally screaming encouragement at me!

Chapter Rating: T

Warnings: language, copious amounts of new OCs (because I cannot help myself)

Word Count: 8.3k words

Lothal wasn’t nearly the paradise Sorgan had been, but it would have to do. Instead of lush green foliage and thick forests, the planet’s landscape was dotted with rock formations that broke up the dead, yellowing grass that covered its plains. Everything appeared to be a different shade of tan or grey.

Arni had told them that the planet had experienced famine and drought during the war, crippling its agricultural industry. But where the farmers had floundered, the mining industry had flourished. The planet was peppered with veins and cave networks that were rich with various metals and minerals that the Empire found useful, so of course it hadn’t wasted any time in swooping in and setting up shop.

Chuckles had been hesitant to travel to any planet that had an Imperial presence, but as Arni pointed out, it was almost impossible to find a world where the Empire didn’t exist in some capacity. Their best option was to find a planet with plenty of rural areas to disappear into, and Lothal provided that. There had been a moment where Chuckles considered returning to Sorgan, but he knew that Ry and Oks had likely had to come up with a story for the drunk that had stumbled out and never returned. Showing back up, especially if the Empire was still around, would only complicate things for them, and that was the last thing he wanted to do for the two women.

So Lothal it was.

Chuckles and Arni had selected a small, family-owned mining operation to target for their next place to settle. The Kern Brothers Mining Company was well away from any major cities, and as a result, a small sort of township had cropped up around the mine itself. It seemed to be a fairly new establishment based on the many job postings that Arni was able to find on various forums, and by all accounts, other than the occasional inspection and weekly supply drops, Imperials largely steered clear of the small community, instead relying on shipments delivered by droids or automated vehicles. 

It wasn’t perfect, but it was about as close as they could hope for. 

As Chuckles settled the freighter into one of the crude landing zones outside of the township, the two younglings pressed forward to get a look at their new home. Aside from the mine, there appeared to be one strip that served as a main part of town, and the area was peppered with buildings that had clearly gone up in a hurry to accommodate the workers. Many of the dwellings seemed to be built from whatever could be salvaged in a hurry, or like the Ayyshus, it appeared many families opted to live out of whatever vessel had carried them there. With opportunities coming and going everywhere across the planet, it made sense to remain mostly mobile should they need to pull up stakes and move on. 

Chuckles could see Nita was less than impressed, and Arni was chewing the inside of their cheek, eyes darting around and taking in every detail. Chuck grinned as the two kids turned to him, clearly trying to hide their disappointment.

Not much of an adventure compared to Sorgan. But, it’s quiet. And probably boring. And we could use boring.

“Not much to look at, is it?” he teased, and he could see both of the younglings relax, apparently considering themselves released from having to pretend.

“It’s very… dusty,” Nita concluded.

“And dry,” Arni added.

“But it’s ours,” Chuck countered. “And we’ll make it what we want. And if not, we’ll find somewhere else.”

Nita nodded, appearing to find this an acceptable compromise, but something had drawn Arni’s attention. They giggled, pointing out the front viewport of the freighter. “Nita! Look! A tooka!”

Nita leapt into the co-pilot seat, leaning forward on the control panel to peer outside. “WHERE?”

“RIGHT THERE BY THAT ROCK!”

The speckled creature scratched at an oversized ear, surveying the ship with disinterest.

“TOOKA!” Nita squealed. “Open the hatch Chuckles! I wanna go make him my friend!” She leapt down from the seat, sprinting towards the ramp and bouncing on her toes eagerly.

Chuck tried to stifle his laughter, releasing the hatch and lowering the ramp. He watched as the two younglings raced outside in the late afternoon sun, Nita at a full sprint with Arni calling for her to slow down so as not to frighten the creature. 

The tooka was most definitely not looking to make new friends, lowering its ears and hissing at the approaching younglings before bolting off of the rock it had been sunning itself on. The clone pilot couldn’t help but grin as he watched the two children chase the Loth cat through the grass, shrieking and squealing as they raced in circles after their furry quarry.

We’ll find a way to be happy here. Dust and dryness be damned.

The sun was beginning to approach the horizon already, casting everything in hues of orange and pink as the cool evening breeze kicked up, rustling through the grass. Chuckles strode down the ramp, leaning one shoulder against a landing strut as he watched the two younglings. 

Yeah. We can make this ours.

—

The following morning, Chuckles headed into the small settlement to look for work. From all of the notices Arni had looked through for job postings, it appeared that the mining company had plenty of positions to fill. Chuckles had opted to once again cover his face, deciding it was a risk not worth taking yet. 

Actually entering the settlement did little to improve his first impression of it. The town was far from a booming metropolis, and while he hadn’t expected to find anything close to the scale of Coruscant’s glittering skyscrapers, he also hadn’t anticipated the rusted out husks of buildings that lined the dirt road that appeared to serve as the main street of the settlement. Even though the sun was barely beginning to break over the horizon, the township was already bustling with activity. Groups of children scampered by, stopping to stare at the stranger with the covered face as he made his way towards the mine entrance. Chuckles had become accustomed to children staring at him during his time as a pilot. The ground troopers were fairly commonplace on Coruscant, but the pilots always seemed to garner special attention from any younglings in the area, wanting to know what it was like to soar among the stars and shoot down vulture droids. 

However, it was the stares of the adults that made a certain tension take root between his shoulder blades. It seemed that there was no shortage of variety in terms of species and homeworld, but they all knew one another, and they also were easily able to identify anyone who wasn’t part of the community. Wary eyes seemed to follow him, and after a few failed attempts at a friendly wave, Chuckles shoved his hands in his pockets, fixing his gaze on the large building in front of him. 

The mine’s main office was certainly one of the most well-maintained structures of the settlement, which he supposed made sense considering it was likely the first thing built, and also the structure that largely sustained the entirety of the small settlement. It was the only multiple-story building in the entire community, well-lit windows glowing in the early morning haze. It was easy to identify the employment office with its freshly painted signage. What did surprise him was the lack of activity inside. He’d anticipated a line out the door, or at least a few applicants waiting around to be met with. But the lobby was completely empty when he entered, a soft chime announcing his arrival, seemingly deafening in the silence. He had to fight the urge to flinch. 

The only other occupant of the employment office was a burly Latero at the far end, who glanced up when Chuckles entered. His eyes roved over Chuckles’s frame, clearly surveying his build and physical usefulness before he heaved himself to his feet with two of his four arms, unleashing a deep sigh and making his way over to a large desk that appeared to be the most central piece of furniture in the room. There, he plopped down heavily on a stool, glancing up at Chuckles again and clearing his throat impatiently. Chuckles took his cue, striding quickly up to the front of the desk, trying not to nervously rock back on his heels. 

“Well?” the Latero prompted.

His voice was gravelly, and he raised a bushy eyebrow at Chuckles, toying with the ends of his facial hair, which was streaked with grey. His forearms were thick and scarred from years of hard labor, and he wore a jumpsuit that was stained and torn in various places. A stitched on name tag on his breast identified him as Jerrno. 

“I’m uh… looking for a job,” Chuckles replied, internally cringing. 

Jerrno snorted. “I figured that much. What kind of work?”

“Whatever you’ve got.” 

The Latero paused, glancing up at Chuckles as though he was an idiot. 

Maybe I am. 

“If ya don’t have career aspirations, do ya at least have a chain code?” 

Chuckles hurriedly produced his chain code disk, handing it to the Latero, who scanned it, eyes glancing back and forth over the lines appearing on his datapad before he glared at Chuckles. 

“No employment history.”

“I worked at a common house. Off the books.”

“How long?”

“Five months.” 

Somehow, Jerrno’s expression became even more judgemental. 

“I’m guessing there’s no references available then. Since ya were ‘off the books.’” 

Chuckles flexed his hands nervously. “‘Fraid not.”

The Latero leaned heavily on the desk, steepling his fingers on his uppermost set of arms while his bottom two gestured at Chuckles. “Son, I know ya see there ain’t exactly a line out the door here. We are hurtin’ for people, but I can’t hire ya if I don’t even know who I’m hiring. ‘Specially with no relevant experience.”

“Listen, I’m strong, and I’m stubborn, and I’ll bust my ass however you need me to.”

Jerrno heaved a sigh. “I don’t even know what species ya are with that getup, and that makes me think you’re hiding from somethin’. I do need people, but not ones that are going to land me in hot water. Understand?” 

Chuckles’s palms were sweaty. 

“I’m human.”

“Can ya take off the mask and prove it?”

We don’t have enough supplies to get anywhere else. It has to be here. We have to make this work. 

Maybe enough time’s passed. The war didn’t really make it to Lothal anyway. Maybe he doesn’t know what a clone looks like.

He sighed, tossing caution to the wind as he pulled off the mask and goggles. 

The Latero’s eyes widened in recognition. Chuckles’s heart fell. 

“You’re a clone.”

Chuckles’s fingers itched for his blaster. He’d left it on the ship.

“I get that a lot,” he replied steadily, hoping a lie might get him at least to the door. 

Jerrno raised an eyebrow. “Son, I served the Republic. I’d know that face anywhere.” 

Chuckles’s mind was racing, but before he could come up with a solution, the Latero heaved another sigh. 

“Well, at least I get the lack of work history now. You’re right, you’re a hard worker. Never met a clone that was a slacker. We can find something for ya. Maker knows there’ll be more of ya with the decommissioning happening.” 

“Decommissioning?” The question was out of Chuck’s mouth before he could stop himself. Jerrno paused. 

“Yeah. Was just announced a handful of rotations ago. How come ya don’t know?” His beady eyes narrowed suspiciously.

The lie came easily this time, and Chuck delivered it as flawlessly as his nerves would allow. He tapped the scar on his cheek. “Bad accident towards the end of the war. They weren’t sure what to do with me, so when it ended, I was released from duty. Guess you could say I got decommissioned early. But being a clone hasn’t exactly made work easy to come by.” His mind was racing, trying to come up with a lie while simultaneously attempting to process what decommissioning would mean for his brothers. 

Some of them surely survived. What the kriff does that mean for them? 

“Accident, huh? It affect ya too much physically?” Jerrno asked, his eyes still slightly narrowed.

Chuckles forced a dry laugh. “Not exactly winning any beauty pageants, and sometimes have some aches and pains, but I promise you won’t find a harder worker than me.” 

Jerrno surveyed him one final time, eyes raking over the scar on Chuck’s face, how he was standing, his overall manner. His gaze felt like an inspection, and Chuckles straightened to attention out of habit. The Latero huffed a laugh. 

“Alright, I think we can find a place for ya. Opening up a new vein first thing tomorrow. Forewoman’s a Nautolan named Anjii. I’ll let her know you’re comin’.” He popped open a drawer, pulling a badge from it and scanning it with his datapad. “Mine entrance is just through the main gates and on the right. Be there tomorrow morning at 0815. Anj will be waiting for the crew, and you’ll get up to speed on the job. We’re expanding in a hurry to meet Imperial quotas, so it’ll be trial by fire. Got a name?” 

“Chuck. Chuck Ayyshu.” 

The Latero punched a few buttons on his datapad, his brow furrowing. “Chain code says Chuckles.” 

“I’d prefer to go by Chuck if that’s alright with you.” 

“No skin off my ass.”

Chuckles assumed his face would draw enough attention on its own. He didn’t feel the need to also have a name that made him stand out more. 

The Latero handed him back his chaincode, and Chuckles tucked it hurriedly away along with the badge he’d been given. 

“Make sure you pack a lunch and water. And don’t be late.” 

“When do I get paid?” 

Jerrno glared at him as if he’d asked an impertinent question. 

“Got two kids I’m feeding,” Chuckles explained.

The Latero’s expression softened. “I didn’t think clones had kids.” 

Chuckles couldn’t help but giggle at that. “I’m sure there’s plenty of kids out there that have my genetics. But these two are adopted. They lost their families in the war, and I lost mine when I left the GAR. So, we found each other.” 

Jerrno nodded. “A fairly common story nowadays,” he said quietly. “How old?”

“Ten and five.”

The Latero’s mouth crinkled into a smile. “I give ya your credits every two weeks. If ya can hold out to the end of this week, I’ll see if I can get ya a bit of an advance. To help ya get settled.” He extended a hand. “Name’s Jerrno by the way. Jerrno Kern.” 

Chuck clasped his hand in, giving it a firm squeeze. “I take it you’re one of the Kern brothers then?” he asked, jerking his head at the logo on the back wall with the Latero’s surname emblazoned in bright orange lettering. 

Jerrno nodded. “Yep. Me and Teef are makin’ a go of it here. Seems promisin’.” He gestured out the door towards the street. “There’s a school on the main drag for your kiddos. The second largest building here. Got a little red sign and some flowers out front. Not a fancy education by any means, but the teachers there care about the kids. Even have a few getting ready to apply to university in a few months.” 

Chuckles smiled. “Thanks. I’ll be sure to look into it. My oldest certainly would like that.” His chest tightened as the words fell from his lips. 

My oldest. Arni is my oldest kid. 

It came so naturally, but his eyes were suddenly a bit misty at the realization. 

“And your youngest?”

Chuckles giggled. “I’m sure she’ll hate it, but she’ll go. Might take some bribing with her favorite snack. But the older one keeps those well-stocked, so shouldn’t be too much of an issue.” 

Jerrno nodded. As he finished punching information into Chuckles’s newly-created employment file on his datapad, the clone noted a holo on the far desk he’d originally been sitting at. It was an old image, but it showed a much younger version of the Latero that sat before him, a female Latero he assumed was his partner, and two squealing younglings, their heads tipped back in uproarious laughter. The image seemed at least a decade old, and he wondered what had become of the children. There was a certain grief in Jerrno’s eyes that made him think the story didn’t have a happy ending. 

“School starts at 0800. I’d drop the kids off on your way to the job tomorrow.” 

“Got it. They need to bring anything?” 

“The teachers have managed to keep a small stockpile. They should be set unless there’s a shortage.” 

“If that’s the case, is there a store I can shop at?”

“The only store is Grinz’s place. He has a pretty good selection normally. Should be able to find what ya need there. But if ya ever can’t, talk to Grinz. He’s got a few good connections that are able to get just about anything ya might think of.” He paused. “But if it’s ever an emergency. Medicine or the like, ya come to me. I can get anything expedited.” 

“That’s kind of you.” 

The Latero huffed a laugh. “We take care of our own out here, Chuck. We have to. That’s the only way this all works.” He pushed himself to his feet, the stool he was perched on making a loud scraping noise as it skidded out from under him. “Don’t be late tomorrow,” he repeated. 

“Thanks. I won’t.” 

—

“Why can’t we just stay on the ship?” 

While he’d anticipated perhaps some resistance to the idea of school from Nita, Chuckles could honestly say that the fight she was putting up was far more than what he’d expected. She’d appeared to be somewhat receptive to the idea the night before when he’d brought it up over dinner. But now, she appeared to be completely changing her tune when confronted with actually having to go.

“Honey, we’ve been over this. School is a good thing. Right Arni?”

The young Twi’lek shrugged, their nose already buried in their sketchbook. When they looked up, Chuckles gave them a pleading expression, hoping they’d provide some sort of support.

“Sure. It’s great if you like to learn,” they mumbled. 

Not what I was hoping for, but sure. 

The little Pantoran was still digging her heels into the dust with every step, making the short walk to the schoolhouse take an eternity. Chuckles was already beginning to feel the margin of time ticking away that he’d allotted himself to get the kids settled into their classes before dashing off to his first shift. 

I promised I wouldn’t be late. I have to believe kriffing up before I even get started won’t give the best first impression. 

He attempted to lengthen his strides, but Nita tugged firmly, and he almost tripped over her, stumbling and biting his lip hard to keep himself from swearing in frustration. Mercifully, the building that served as the schoolhouse was within view, and he finally readjusted the small pack of food and water on his back and scooped Nita up, tossing her over his shoulder. Her protests grew louder, drawing some additional attention from the townsfolk that were beginning to emerge from their dwellings for the day. Chuckles gave them a tight smile and sheepish wave as Nita thrashed in his grip. 

“I DON’T WANNA GO.” 

She’s never done this before. WHAT is HAPPENING?

“She seems upset,” Arni mumbled.  

“Yes, thank you for that very astute observation, kid,” Chuckles muttered, finally setting Nita on her feet when they were within a few steps of the school’s front door. He could hear children squealing and laughing inside, and some round faces were pressed against the windows, their attention drawn either by Nita’s shouts or just the fact that there was someone new and exciting outside. 

Reaching down, he patted Nita’s head in between the buns that Arni had carefully styled that morning. “Honey, you’re gonna have a great time. I know not everyone can get as excited about school as Arni, but I still think this is gonna be good for you.” 

The little Pantoran was completely unswayed, her large golden eyes brimming with tears as she realized she wouldn’t be convincing her adopted parent to let her stay home. “Chuckles,” she whimpered. “Please don’t leave us.” 

He squatted down, holding out his palms towards her. “I’m never leaving you, honey. It’s just temporary. I gotta go to work, but I’ll be back to pick you up before you know it.” She took his hands, and he pulled her closer, speaking quietly enough so only she could hear. “This is just something we need to do in order to blend in here. School is supposed to be fun! Plus, don’t you want to learn some new stuff? Hang out with other kids?”

Nita’s golden eyes were still shining with tears, and she buried her face in his shoulder, muffling her voice as she whispered to him. “All of the other kids I used to hang out with are dead.” Arni stiffened next to her. 

Chuck’s heart stuttered in his chest as the realization sunk in. He pulled Nita into his arms, wrapping her in a tight hug. 

“Oh honey. I’m so sorry. I didn’t put it together.” 

“It’s not your fault,” she said quietly, some of her tears finally breaking loose. “I’m just scared.” 

“We’re about to start this morning’s lesson!” a voice called from the door. “Will your children be joining us today?” 

Chuckles peered around Nita’s shoulder, meeting the golden eyes of the tall, blue-skinned woman standing in the doorway. She was watching the three of them patiently, some of her dark hair blowing in front of her face in the early morning breeze. Chuckles gave her a helpless smile, and she nodded, seemingly understanding his current predicament.  

“I promise that won’t happen here. You won’t lose your friends again like that. You know that, right?”

Nita nodded into his shoulder. He knew that was little consolation. He’d held similar fears during his entire career, fears that his ship would come apart around him again, fears that he’d lose his entire squadron again. He’d known then he was playing a statistics game, and even though he thought Nita’s likelihood of living through a second once-in-a-millenium genocide that included children was almost zero, he knew that wouldn’t do anything to dissipate the fear she was feeling. His eyes drifted back to the teacher, who was still waiting patiently in the door for her new pupils. 

“Look, your teacher is just like you, honey,” Chuckles tried, nodding at the woman.

“Actually, she’s a Wroonian, not a Pantoran,” Arni corrected. Chuckles glared at them. They shrugged. “They’re different.” Turning, they called over their shoulder to the teacher. “Just a minute. My sister’s a little nervous.”

A sudden thought struck Chuckles. “Arni, are you alright doing this?” he asked, suddenly fearful he’d missed a cue from them too, something that would indicate they shared Nita’s fear. But they nodded, their lekku jiggling with the motion. 

“I’m fine. I want to go to school. But I’m worried about her.” 

The Wroonian woman approached them, squatting down next to Chuckles in front of Nita. “Hello, dear girl. What’s your name?” 

The little Pantoran examined the woman in front of her, her large golden eyes raking over the newcomer from head to toe. A gentle waft of the woman’s perfume filled Chuckles’s nose, inundating him with the smell of vanilla and cinnamon, but he resisted the urge to look over at his new compatriot, instead focusing on Nita and her reaction. 

The wrinkle between Nita’s eyebrows appeared to soften as she observed the teacher for a few more moments before she finally replied, “Nita. My name is Nita Ayyshu.”

The woman smiled at her gently, extending a hand. “It’s lovely to meet you, Nita. I’m Endoline, but you can call me Teacher Endi. Does that sound alright?” 

Nita nodded, slowly taking the teacher’s hand. Chuckles saw Endi squeeze it lightly in greeting before turning to Arni. “And who might you be?”

“Arni,” they replied with a shy smile. 

“Excellent. Well, would you both care to come and join us? Today, we’re focusing on mathematics in the morning with sciences in the afternoon. Do you like either of those things?” 

“I like both of them,” Arni replied eagerly, their large brown eyes lighting up in a way Chuckles hadn’t seen from them before. 

Endi turned to Nita, clearly hoping to elicit a similar response. Chuckles was internally churning, praying to whatever deity was listening that she’d take another step closer. 

“I don’t know about math, but I suppose I like science,” the little Pantoran conceded. “I like the flowers that Arni draws and the notes they make about them.” 

Endi’s smile widened as she clapped her hands excitedly. “Well the two of you couldn’t have picked a better day to join us then. This afternoon, we’re walking out towards the rock formations to see what sort of native flowers are out there and document their life cycles. Does that sound fun?”

Arni appeared to understand that their enthusiasm was noted by default. The three of them all seemed to be holding their breath as Nita mulled it over. 

Finally, she smiled slightly, wiping at her eyes. “That does sound fun.” 

“Very good,” Endi said gently, pushing herself back to a standing position. “Would you like to come and meet the other students? They’re always excited to make new friends.” She reached out both hands towards them. The two children looked up at Chuckles, who gave them an encouraging nod. 

“Go with Teacher Endi. I’ll be back to pick you both up at the end of the day. Ok?”

“Pinky swear?” Nita asked. 

Chuckles huffed a laugh, extending both pinkies. “Pinky swear.” 

Both younglings locked their little fingers with his as Endi stood by patiently. Once their oath had been sealed, they both took her outstretched hands, and she began leading them towards the door. Chuckles stood, trying not to bounce nervously as his two children disappeared inside the school.

Never trusted them with anyone besides Oksann and Ry. And I knew them pretty well before I ever let this happen. I just met this woman. 

He took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. 

And it’s going to have to be alright. 

Just before closing it, Endi cast one more look over her shoulder, giving him a soft smile. It was then that he noticed how strikingly beautiful she was, her golden eyes twinkling at him in the early morning sun as she tucked a dark curl back into place behind her ear. 

Dark curls. Just like… 

“I assume you’ll be at the mine if there are any pressing issues?” she asked. 

Chuckles dug his fingernails into the meat of his palm, chasing away the memory of someone he’d long kept buried. “Yep. I shouldn’t be too late picking them up.” 

An indignant shriek ripped through the air, and Endi’s head whipped around as her brow furrowed into an authoritative stare that even made Chuckles’s insides ripple. He couldn’t tell who she was looking at, but he certainly didn’t envy the kid. 

“Dez, what have we discussed about pulling Ooni’s montrals?” she asked firmly. A sheepish response that Chuckles couldn’t make out came from somewhere behind the windows. “Thank you for apologizing,” Endi replied. “Now let’s all take our seats.” She turned back towards the door, giving Chuckles another warm smile. 

He mouthed good luck at her. 

Her smile widened and she winked before she shut the door the rest of the way, and Chuckles couldn’t ignore the way his heart fluttered this time. 

Well. That’s new. 

His feet carried him towards the mine as he tried not to think too hard about the heat in his cheeks. Or the other individual with dark curls and sharp eyes. 

—

Whatever Chuckles had imagined Anjii might be like, he’d never have gotten close to reality. The Nautolan was about as rough and tumble as anyone he’d ever met. She swore more than even his most vulgar brothers, was covered in tattoos, and took no shit from anyone. He hadn’t met many Nautolans in his lifetime, having only bumped into Master Kit Fisto once or twice in between briefings during the war, but whatever impression Fisto had given him of Nautolans, Anjii quickly dispelled. 

0814. Cutting it close, he thought as he’d sprinted into the shaft, scanning his badge and almost tripping on his way through the entry point in his haste. As he hurriedly clipped his badge to his belt, he ran into something solid that knocked the wind out of him with a loud oof. He stumbled backwards, clutching his chest and wheezing as the obstruction in his path whipped around and stared at him with piercing black eyes. 

“You the new blood then?” the Nautolan asked, hardly seeming phased by the collision. 

“Yep. You Anjii?”

“You see any other water dwellers lining up to work on this dried up husk of a rock?” she grunted, glancing down at her datapad. “Go by Anj though. And you go by… Chuckles?”

“I prefer Chuck,” he muttered, mentally making a note to find out if Jerrno had given his real name as some sort of hazing exercise. 

“I would too with a name like that,” Anj cackled. “Doesn’t exactly make you sound like a serious person.” She circled him slowly, eying him up and down. “Clone then, eh? The name makes more sense, I suppose. But why not something cooler like ‘Zap’ or ‘Comet’?” 

Chuckles shrugged. “It’s a family name.” 

If Anj got the joke, she didn’t let on, only responding with a muted “hmph.” As she circled him, he felt his shoulders immediately draw up and back, his spine straightening to attention out of reflex. 

“At ease, soldier,” she guffawed. “We’re not like that here. I’m just sizing you up since you didn’t have a position listed.” 

“And?” he prodded. 

She stopped in front of him under one of the dim tunnel lights, and he finally got a good look at her. She was at least half a meter shorter than him, but he sensed that didn’t bother her. Her skin was a dark grey, and every visible piece of it that wasn’t dappled with light scarring was covered with ink, although he couldn’t discern any of the symbols from this distance. Several of her tendrils had woven bands wrapped around them, and each tendril shifted from grey to a bright green at the tips. He also noted one or two of her tendrils were missing, cut off at various lengths like a bad haircut and scarred at the ends. She didn’t appear concerned with his appraisal of her as she tapped a long finger against her lips. 

“We’ll put you in the clearing crew to start. I assume Jerrno told you we’re blasting into a new vein today.”

“He did.” 

“Good. Deploying droids is a pain if we’re not certain about a vein, especially since we don’t have enough in the fleet yet. So we’ll be clearing manually until we’re sure about the new prospect. Then we’ll redirect a few of them down there to help.”

“Jerrno and Teef planning on upping their droid fleet?” he asked. “Figure if they’re serious about expansion, might want to do that rather than relying on manual labor.” 

Anj scoffed. “Course they are. But you need to make money in order to do that. I don’t know how long you’ve been out of the tube, but in case you can’t tell, this is a fairly new setup.” 

Chuckles huffed in exasperation, trying to keep his temper in check at the reference to his creation. “I suppose it was too much to hope for to not have what I am get talked about, but if it’s alright with you, maybe we keep the tube jokes to a minimum.” 

“A sense of humor is necessary for the job,” Anj replied with a shrug. 

“Yeah, well when you’ve had the term ‘tube-bred freak’ screamed at you enough times by the people you’re supposed to be protecting, it somehow loses its charm,” he muttered through clenched teeth. 

Something shifted in Anj’s expression. She rocked her weight to one foot. “Fair enough. I didn’t know that’s how it was. I apologize. Won’t happen again.” 

“Sorry to be a buzzkill,” Chuckles mumbled. He wasn’t used to being apologized to, and as a result, wasn’t sure how to react. He felt his knuckles creak as he released the fists he didn’t even realize he’d clenched. 

Anj huffed a laugh, stepping forward and slapping him on the shoulder. He’d assumed she was strong, but her grip was still surprisingly firm. “Another thing you need to survive down there is a good sense of trust. I don’t know how many mines you’ve been in, but it’s dangerous work. We watch each other’s backs and make sure everyone goes home at the end of the day. You spend enough time down here with the same people day in and day out, you become a bit like family. And that means we don’t make each other feel shitty or othered. Unless they’re an asshole and deserve it. Got it?”

“Yes, ma’am,” he replied with a lopsided grin. 

“None of that shit, now. Not when I was just starting to like you.” She stepped past him, heading towards a set of lockers. “Now, let’s get you fitted for some gear and get down there. If you survive the first week, we’ll work on getting you some personal stuff more fitted to you.” She popped open a locker, and a pile of helmets spilled out with a clatter. “See if one of those will fit your dome.” 

Chuck squatted down, picking through the battered plastoid helmets. “Not everyone lasts the first week?’’

Anj barked out a laugh as she popped open a different locker that appeared to be her personal one. It was more well-organized, and she pulled out a bright green helmet that matched the tips of her tendrils. “Most don’t make it three days before they pack up and bug out. Jerrno’s assured me you’re made of sturdier stuff. We’ll see how you fare.” 

—

Anj hadn’t over exaggerated, not by a long shot. By the end of the day, standing felt like an overwhelming physical endeavour, and Chuckles leaned heavily against the interior of the lift as it carried them out of the mine’s depths. It had been slow going, but they’d managed to successfully open the vein, finding more doonium than they’d anticipated. When the dust from their blasting had finally cleared enough to see again, they’d cheered when they caught sight of the glittering metallic streaks in the walls around them. Even Chuckles had giggled like a maniac, his breathing filter making his laughter sound like mechanical hiccups. 

Now, every muscle in his body was screaming with exhaustion. When the hissing of the lift’s purge system finally ceased, the crew around him all removed their breathing gear and helmets. Chuckles followed suit, running his fingers through his sweat-soaked mohawk. His hands were blistered under his gloves, and every exposed bit of skin was covered in a thick layer of grime. As he hooked his breathing mask to his belt, he inhaled the sharp, fresh air, nearly choking on how cool it was compared to the filtered warm air he’d been breathing all day. His stomach growled loudly, reminding him that he hadn’t packed enough food or water for himself, something Anj had teased him about before offering him half of a protein bar she’d stuffed in her pocket. 

“The new ones always underpack on their first day. You’ll figure it out. Or you’ll quit,” she’d joked.

With heavy eyes, he observed the rest of his crew that were jammed into the lift with him. There were two other human men in the crew whose names he’d already forgotten. They’d eyed him warily when Anj introduced him, and for the most part, they’d kept their distance throughout the day, which was just fine with Chuckles. There was a tall Nikto that had identified himself as Lu, who also appeared to be Anj’s second in command. He was quiet with fiercely observant eyes and always seemed to be at Chuckles’s elbow any time he had a question, answering quickly and firmly before moving off down the line to help somewhere else. It was a bit unnerving, but Chuckles’s appreciation outweighed the nerves. The technical specialist was a young Rodian that had enthusiastically introduced herself as Helly before talking Chuckles’s ear off about the type of droids they’d need and how she calibrated them to precisely mine the doonium, ensuring that there was minimal environmental contamination from the surrounding rock which made purification efforts down the line less difficult. He was positive he couldn’t regurgitate any of the information she’d shared back at her with any sort of accuracy, but she honestly just seemed excited to have anyone listen to her for more than five minutes. She reminded him a bit of Arni. 

“You alright back there, rookie?” Anj called over her shoulder as she undid the wrap that was holding her tendrils in place under her helmet, shaking them loose. 

“Yeah,” Chuck managed to reply. “Easiest first day I could have asked for.”

Anj chuckled at that, and even Lu huffed a laugh. “Then we didn’t work you hard enough,” the Nautolan replied. 

“Make sure you take it easy tonight and consume plenty of water and electrolytes,” Helly chattered at him rapidly, offering him a flask of water. “It’ll help your muscles heal, and-”

“Hells, don’t overwhelm the guy just yet. We want him to come back tomorrow, remember?” Anj teased. “He’s been kind enough to endure your dumping all day. Let him have a moment of peace.” 

Helly seemed unbothered, but Chuckles still felt a twinge of guilt. “Thanks,” he rasped, returning the flask after taking a massive swig. “I’ll be sure to put down a few more liters before bed.”

Helly nodded silently, but her eyes sparkled. He wasn’t sure how she still had so much energy. 

Maybe I’ll get there eventually. 

Several minutes later, the lift doors slid open and Chuckles shuffled out along with the rest of the crew to the lockers, where he replaced the items Anj had outfitted him with at the beginning of the day. The helmet had been a little small, and he made a mental note to try and size up the following morning. 

Anj squatted down next to him, removing the air monitor she kept strapped to her ankle. She leaned over, speaking quietly to him. “I’d recommend at least two canteens of water tomorrow and plenty of protein bars. Dried fruit is good too for the sugar. Nothing greasy or you’ll be looking at your lunch again before the day is out. Got it?”

“Got it,” he mumbled. “It always like this?”

“What, sore to the point where you think you’re gonna die and ready to collapse on the first flat surface you see?” She laughed quietly. “Yeah. Seems about right.” She clapped him on the shoulder. “See you tomorrow, Chuck.” 

He managed to get his gear put away into the correct lockers before limping through the checkpoint. His legs seemed to get a little less sore as he walked, but he could feel the blisters on the bottom of his feet promising retribution at a later time. He rolled his shoulders and was greeted with the burn of muscle soreness. 

I think even my eyebrows are sore. Not sure how that happens. But Maker, everything hurts. 

His feet somehow carried him back to the schoolhouse’s front door, where he found a handful of children filtering out slowly. When he poked his head inside, he saw Arni sitting at a desk furiously drawing in their sketchbook, their tongue poking out of one side of their mouth. Nita was perched on a bench in the back of the room, weaving flowers into a chain with Endi. At the sound of his boots thudding on the hardwood flooring, Endi’s eyes snapped up, her warm smile lighting up her face again when their eyes met. Chuckles was suddenly very aware of how filthy and unkempt he looked. He ran his fingers through his mohawk again, trying to muss it into something presentable. 

Endi leaned down, saying something softly to Nita, whose head whipped around. Her eyes lit up when she saw Chuckles, and he almost melted with relief as she launched herself off the bench with a chain of flowers clutched in her hand and raced towards him. 

“CHUCKLES!” 

Despite his knees screaming at him in protest, Chuckles managed to squat down to the little Pantoran’s level as she eagerly danced in front of him.

“Teacher Endi helped me make this crown with the flowers we found today. Isn’t it pretty?”

“Fit for a princess,” he agreed, taking the delicate blossoms she held out to him. He grinned at her before leaning forward and putting the crown on her head, nestling it around her buns. “See? Perfect.” 

Nita giggled, bouncing on her feet. 

“What about you, kid? You have a good day?” Chuckles asked, glancing at Arni. 

They nodded quietly, but an irrepressible grin was spreading across their face. 

“Good stuff.”

“Do you have a moment?” Endi asked, coming to stand next to him. 

“Uh… yeah sure,” Chuck replied. “Nita, Arni, why don’t you two go wait outside while I speak with Teacher Endi?” 

The two younglings nodded before sprinting out the door, laughing loudly. 

Chuckles watched them go before trying to push himself to a standing position. He grunted as one leg cramped up, and he would have toppled over if Endi’s hands hadn’t caught his arm, helping him lean against one of the small desks. 

“Sorry about that,” he mumbled, trying to ignore the heat rushing to his cheeks. 

“It’s quite alright. You look like every other miner that’s just survived their first shift with Anjii.” 

“That bad, huh?” he joked, sitting heavily on the top of the desk. 

A silence hung between them for a moment before Chuckles cleared his throat. “So, everything alright with the kids? Did Nita settle in?” 

“She did,” Endi assured him. “And everything’s fine. I just like to meet with new parents to see if there’s anything I should know about their children. And…” she paused, searching for words. “I can tell by your family dynamic that it’s likely there’s a good amount I should know.” 

“Because I’m a clone?” he asked, bristling slightly. 

“Because you’re all different species, because they call you by your first name, and yes, because you’re a clone. It’s not for the reasons you think. I just know that you can’t have been a parent long yourself. You were a soldier, bred for fighting.”

“I can take care of my kids.”

She sighed, raising her hands in surrender. “I’m not saying you can’t. That you haven’t. They obviously love you, and I can see how much you care for them. All I’m saying is that it must have been a large adjustment. I can only assume that they’re orphans, and judging by Nita’s reaction this morning, they haven’t been separated from you very much. I just… I just want to see if there’s anything I can do to make this transition easier for them. And for you.” 

Chuckles nodded, some of his defensiveness melting away. “You’re right,” he conceded. “They lost their families at the end of the war. I was discharged early due to injury.” 

Mostly true. If I hadn’t of hit my head hard enough, I’d have been another cog in the Imperial machine. 

“We’d tried to make a home on a different world, but it’s been hard to find work because of what I am.” 

“But now that the decommissioning’s happening, you’ve had a little more luck?”

“Yeah. People don’t think I’m a deserter,” he joked. 

She laughed softly. “Well, I think what you’re doing for them is something special. I’d argue that you’ve done enough with your service during the war, but taking on two orphaned younglings is something else entirely.”

“It hasn’t been easy,” he agreed. “But never because of them. The two of them just fit with me immediately. There were growing pains of course. Still are at times. But… but I can’t think of them as anything other than my kin at this point. Weird as that may sound. They’re my kids. And I want them to be happy. And I want to give them a sense of normalcy. I think them going to school here will be good. Arni loves to learn.”

“They are a very special student,” Endi agreed. “Their journal is impressive. The way they document everything in such detail and then can recall it later. It’s astounding, frankly. They’re quite advanced for their age.” 

“And Nita is a bit of a firecracker.” 

“That she is,” Endi giggled. “She was shy at first, but I’ll be surprised if she doesn’t unionize the entire class come the winter. I may be facing a mutiny.” 

Chuckles tipped his head back and laughed loudly at that. “Well, be sure to comm me when that happens. I’ll stand with you against her uprising.” Leaning forward, he whispered conspiratorially. “I’m not saying bribery should be your first tactic, but a bag of fried crispy snacks will get you a long way.” 

“Noted. You’ll be my first consult should such an uprising occur.” Her eyes were sparkling, and there was a purple blush in her cheeks. She had darker blue freckles, Chuckles noticed. They dotted over her cheeks and nose, and one or two larger ones were visible on her neck. She cleared her throat, and his eyes snapped back to meet hers. The purple hue in her cheeks had deepened, and suddenly, his face felt like it was on fire. 

Way to leer at the teacher on the first day. Good job, you kriffing nerfherder. 

He pushed himself to his feet hurriedly. 

“Well, I suppose we should get going. I appreciate you helping them along on their first day.”

“Of course,” she replied, standing quickly as well. “There is one other thing.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, Nita did tear a hole in the knee of her leggings today while climbing on a rock. She skinned her knee slightly, but a little bacta should do the trick. We bandaged it the best we could here.” She stepped forward hesitantly, and it was then that he noticed a piece of flimsi in her hands. She held it out to him. “I know new clothes are expensive, and seeing as you’re just getting settled, I imagine credits may be a little tight. If you want, I know how to mend clothing. I’d be more than happy to patch up her knee.” She tapped the flimsi. “This is my comm frequency if… if you’d like that.” 

Chuckles was fairly certain his face was going to melt off of his skull. His stomach was churning and a tingle ran up his spine. When he looked from the scrap of flimsi to Endi, her cheeks were somehow even more purple, and he imagined his entire face had to be glowing with how hot it felt. 

“Th-thanks,” he stuttered. “I just might.” 

“Alright then.” 

They stood awkwardly for another moment before Chuckles carefully folded the flimsi and stuck it into his pocket. “See you tomorrow?”

“I’ll be here.” 

“Good.” It felt like a silly thing, but his brain felt completely scrambled, and it was the best response he could come up with before he turned sharply on his heel and stepped outside. 

That was not how I expected this day to end. 

Nita was twirling in circles, kicking up dust as her hair ribbons fluttered around her face. The flower crown was still firmly perched on her head. When she caught sight of Chuckles, she raced towards him. Arni was sitting on the steps, still sketching. 

“The princess of the Starlight would like a piggyback ride home,” Nita stated, her spine erect as she attempted to address him as regally as she could. 

“Nita, he’s sore. I don’t think-” Arni started, but Chuckles put a hand on their shoulder. 

“I can do it. If you carry this,” he said, handing off his lunch satchel. Arni took it, looking on nervously as Chuckles sat down on the steps, patting his shoulders. 

“Your chariot awaits, my lady.” 

Nita squealed with delight, racing up the steps and wrapping her arms around Chuck’s neck. He tucked his arms under her knees and stood, teetering for a second before regaining his balance. Arni looked on with concern, but Chuckles tossed them a reassuring wink. 

It was a good day. I may not be able to walk tomorrow, and they might not like school as much, but I’m counting today as a victory. 

“Faster, Chuckles!” Nita demanded. 

Huffing a laugh, Chuckles whinnied like a fathier as he broke into a gallop, the blisters on his feet forgotten. Nita shrieked with laughter, and Arni jogged patiently next to them. When Chuck looked over, they were laughing too, their deep guffaw that they seemed to reserve for only their most joyous moments. For the first time since they left Sorgan, it felt as though Chuck’s heart might burst out of his chest with happiness. 

We can make a home here. We can make it ours.

Tag List: @seriowan @partofttheeternalsoul @rosmariner @misogirl828 @ellichonkasaurusrex @zoeykallus @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @gjrain20-starwars @staycalmandhugaclone @redheadgirl @fordo-kixed-rex @wizardofrozz @ariadnes-red-thread @extrahotpixels @justanothersadperson93 @leftealeaf @meekaielmyerhs99 @kaminocasey @echos-girlfriend @lucyysthings @obihiddlenox @merkitty49 @littlemissmanga @clonecyaree @baba-fett @sleepingsun501 @rexxdjarin @samspenandsword @babygirlrex0504 @ladytano420 @fxlsealarm @runforrestr @rennyboo9 @djarrex @rain-on-kamino @ladykatakuri @arctrooper69 @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall

#karrde writes #one step at a time #osaat #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #fanfiction #fan fic #found family #angst #fluff #clone OC #jedi OC #pantoran OC #twilek OC #too many OCs to name really #OC Chuckles #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Nita Ayyshu

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 12

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: You know those chapters you sometimes write way in advance and are very excited to get to for whatever reason? Yeah, this was one of those. As always, thank you to the outstanding @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta-reading this chapter for me (TJ turned this around in record time and so EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU)!

Chapter Rating: E

Warnings: PiV sex, fingering, oral sex, cum eating, language

Word Count: 8.7k words

BOOM. 

The first firework illuminated the small apartment with a bright purple glow as Endi’s hands tangled in the fading blue of Chuckles’s mohawk, tugging lightly and drawing a grunt from him. She pulled him towards her, and he followed willingly, stumbling in the dark until he had her pinned against the kitchen wall, his hands finding their way to her waist. Their lips worked frantically against one another, his chapped ones gliding along her silky ones. 

How is she so soft? 

The flash of the firework was short lived, plunging them into the inky black of Lothal’s night as it faded. Blue spots danced in front of Chuckles’s eyes in the sudden darkness, and he blinked rapidly to clear his vision. The sudden quiet was punctuated by the blood pounding in his ears and the sharp breaths coming from Endi’s nose as she pulled him even closer to her. He could smell her perfume, sweet and enticing, and all he could think of was how much more he wanted to taste. Her tongue hungrily traced along his lower lip, and he granted her entrance, unable to stop a groan from bubbling up within him as her teeth grazed his lip. 

He wanted this. He wanted her. 

Two more loud blasts emanated from outside, and in the flash of bright pink light, Chuck could see Endi’s eyes were blown wide, her golden irises tinted by the magenta explosion, but somehow, impossibly dark. Her lashes fluttered closed as her hand clenched the front of his shirt, tangling in the buttons before she popped the first one open with ease. 

Oh.

His heart raced as her nimble fingers undid another button and then another, exposing his chest to her. As the light faded again in the kitchen, her hands finally touched him, no longer an innocent, potentially accidental graze, but with her palms pressed firmly against his chest, trailing through his chest hair and tracing the muscles the mine had carved into him. Her touch sent electricity licking up his spine, and his cock twitched in his pants as her hands slid further under his shirt to his back, her fingers digging into his skin. 

In the darkness, she panted his name in his ear. 

“Chuckles.” 

His hands slipped under her, bunching in her long skirts until he found the backs of her thighs to hold, and she practically leapt into his grasp. She was surprisingly light as he pinned her against the wall, and she writhed in his grip as his lips trailed down her jaw to her throat. His teeth grazed her skin, and she inhaled sharply, tipping her head back to grant him more access. Chuckles nosed at the collar of her blouse, and her hands frantically flew to undo the snaps holding it closed to reveal more skin to him. The first clasp came undone, exposing her collar bone, and Chuckles couldn't wait another moment, trailing his tongue along the newly uncovered flesh before latching onto her skin and sucking a bruise there. He pulled back just as a rapid burst of white strobing fireworks popped sporadically outside, and in the bright light, he saw confirmation of his claim to her in the form of a dark purplish mark forming where her shoulder met her neck. They were panting, staring at one another as the light from the fireworks strobed around them. 

“Bedroom,” Endi said quietly. 

It was all the invitation Chuckles needed. He lowered her to the ground before crashing his lips against hers again clumsily in the dark. Her hands were already working at his belt as she stumbled backwards, haphazardly tugging him along with her. He did his best to stay on his feet, reaching out his hands to fumble around any obstacles as she led him through the darkened apartment to her small sleeping quarters. Another salvo of fireworks exploded outside, casting the tiny bedroom in shades of blue and green. Chuckles barely had time to register the humble desk, wardrobe, and small bed before she jerked him towards it with a surprising strength. He almost fell on top of her, landing between her knees on the mattress. Her chest was heaving, and he took advantage of the brief light source to undo the fortuitously front-facing clasp of her bra, freeing her breasts. He cupped her left one, grazing his thumb over her nipple. She arched into his touch with a gasp, her dark curls spreading across her pillow as orange and pink blasts alternated outside, illuminating her skin in bright colors. 

He leaned down, latching onto her nipple with his lips and gently flicking his tongue against the pebbled flesh experimentally. Endi whined, her hands desperately grabbing at her skirts, pulling them out of the way before her hands were back in his hair, holding his face to her skin.

“Don’t stop,” she pleaded. 

Chuckles had no intention of stopping, not now. He laved at her skin with his tongue, working his way back up to her neck and lips, shrugging the last of his inhibitions off with his shirt as he finally allowed himself to revel in the fantasies he’d been chasing from his mind for the last month. 

It felt like an indulgence to allow himself this, to give in to his desires when he’d spent months worrying about Arni and Nita’s safety, convinced that the Empire was always one breath away from finding them. But now, for the first time since the end of the war, he abandoned all of his misgivings in favor of the attraction he’d been nurturing for Endi, allowing her to pull him into her. 

Endi’s hand found his wrist, guiding it between her legs to her panties, which he slid off with ease before pushing his fingers into her. He was met with hardly any resistance, easily burying himself to the knuckle as her eager cunt slicked his hand. She immediately clenched around his digits, whining and panting. The sounds she made sent blood rushing to his cock, and it wasn’t long before he was aching for her as he watched her come undone on his fingertips, her arousal dribbling over his knuckles as he stroked the spongy place inside her. He pressed his thumb to her clit, and she covered her mouth with her hand to stifle a whine. He went to push it away, not wanting to be robbed of a single sound she made, but instead, she pulled his lips to hers, burying the fingers of one hand in his hair while fumbling to undo his pants further with the other. 

Her hand was soft and surprisingly warm when it finally found his cock and freed it from his pants, wrapping around it and stroking him fervently. Her palm was dry, but her grip was just firm enough to provide the perfect amount of friction. His hips jerked on instinct, and he moaned against the skin of her throat as he thrusted into her hand.

“Please,” she whispered against his ear. 

She wrapped her legs around him, digging her heels into his back in invitation, and he took it without hesitation, pushing her skirts up further to give him just enough access to notch his head at her entrance. He could feel the heat radiating off of her as he dragged the tip of his cock through her folds, coating himself in her slick. He wanted to fully undress her, to taste her and take his time with her, and there would be a time and a place for that, but right now, he just wanted to be buried in her warm, welcoming heat and hear the sounds she made just for him. 

Chuckles sank his cock into her easily with a strangled groan and immediately began fucking her at a frantic pace, his loosened belt jingling as the bed creaked beneath them. Her nails scraped the skin of his back as he panted against her skin, inhaling the smell of her sweat and perfume. He was lost in her, discarding all of his inhibitions and worries to sate the need he felt. It wasn’t just the sex; it was sex with her, the woman he’d been pining after but had been afraid to allow himself to pursue. And yet, here he was, giving into his desires as she whined in his ear, her warm, wet cunt clenching around his cock and pulling him further from all of his worries and doubts. 

It was a release in more ways than one, undeniably overdue if his urgency and eagerness was any indication.

The fireworks show continued outside, sporadically illuminating the room in flashes of brilliant colors, and each time, Chuckles stole the opportunity to look up at Endi, taking in everything he was doing to her. Her brows were furrowed and lips were pursed as several quick bursts of gold erupted outside of the window, illuminating her irises as she met his gaze, pulling their foreheads together, panting against his lips. He felt like he was drowning in her eyes as she clenched around him again, seemingly pulling him deeper into her. He dug his toes into the floor, pressing himself even further in as the room faded to black again, sliding his hands under the curves of her ass to give himself a better angle. She wrapped her arms around his neck, digging her nails into his back as she ground herself against him, and the effort formed a thin sheen of sweat across her skin, leaving a salty taste in his mouth as he kissed and licked and sucked every inch of her he could reach. 

She’s perfect. She’s mine. 

His face hit the pillow next to her head, and her hair tickled his nose as he redoubled his efforts with a throaty grunt. Endi cried out, clawing at his back and shoulders, leaving stinging red marks in her wake, and Chuckles felt himself spurred on further at the thought of wearing those marks, of the memories he’d have of this night. 

When the next firework exploded in a burst of purple, he could see Endi’s head was tipped back against her pillow, eyes closed in ecstasy and lips parted as she fisted the blankets. She moaned, and it was the sweetest sound Chuckles could remember hearing. The tendons in her throat were pronounced as her back arched, and Chuckles pressed his lips to the place where her neck met her shoulder, sucking another bruise into her flesh. As the darkness recaptured the room again, he felt her dig her heels into his ass, one hand cradling the back of his head, almost holding him in place as he grazed her throat with his teeth. 

“Right there,” she panted. “I’m close. I’m so close. Don’t stop. Please.” 

Normally, Chuckles was incredibly vocal in the bedroom, but he felt as though the air had been punched from his lungs by the feel of her. He hadn’t intended to come into Endi’s home tonight for any reasons beyond the repair, and he certainly hadn’t planned to fuck her in her bed with their clothes still half on. But here she was, spread beneath him in surrender, pleading with him for her release, and Maker, he would have given her anything she asked for in that moment. 

“W-where?” he grunted. 

“Inside,” she gasped. “I’m ready. Please. Please let me finish, Chuckles.” 

“Together,” he panted against her mouth. “Ready?”

She pressed her forehead against his, nodding frantically, and they locked eyes as Chuckles felt her cunt tighten around him, milking his cock. With a sharp exhale, he let himself go, every spurt of his spend ricocheting up his spine and drawing a whimper from his lips. Endi went rigid, her fingers digging into his skin as her muscles clenched around him. She jolted in his arms as wave after wave of her own orgasm washed over her in tandem with his. After a few moments, she relaxed with a long, shaky breath, and he collapsed next to her, panting hard. 

He watched the rise and fall of her chest, still fully on display thanks to her haphazardly ripped-open blouse. Before he could think about it, he reached his hand out, his fingers grazing the bruise he’d left on her right breast, and she shuddered under his touch, whipping her head around to gaze at him. 

“Sorry,” he murmured. 

She smiled, and it seemed even more dazzling than usual. “S’ok,” she whispered. “The kids can’t see it there.”

They stared at each other for a few more moments, getting lost in one another as the fireworks continued outside. Chuckles felt his cheeks become sore from a smile he didn’t realize he had on his face. It was the widest it had been in a while, perhaps since the end of the war. He giggled quietly. Endi rolled onto her side to face him. 

“What is it?” 

“It’s just… you’re so beautiful,” he whispered. She ducked her head, and he reached forward, pushing some hair from her face before slipping a knuckle under her chin and kissing her tenderly. She melted into him, pulling back with a quiet laugh. 

“Careful,” she whispered, resting her forehead against his. “Otherwise we’ll have to go again.” 

“I fail to see the problem,” he mumbled against her lips, kissing her again. She giggled as he rolled her underneath him. 

Chuckles propped himself up on his elbows, looking down at her, and for just a moment, it wasn’t Endi, but Brienna underneath him as an orange firework lit up the room, her dark curls splayed out on the pillow and a smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. He blinked, and Endi was there again, but his stomach twisted slightly from the intrusive memory. 

“Chuckles?” Endi had seen him react, and concern was etched on her face. “Is something wrong?” 

He huffed a sigh, burying his face in her neck. “I didn’t mean to do it like this,” he whispered. “I’m sorry.” Wrapping his arm around her torso, he rested his head on her chest. “I’m not good at the romance thing, clearly.” 

She placed a kiss to his forehead before he felt her fingers toy with his mohawk again. “I didn’t exactly discourage you,” she murmured. “In fact, I wanted it.” 

“True, but you deserve to be taken to dinner. To go dancing. To be doted on,” he said quietly, tracing patterns on her skin with his fingers. His heart clenched at the familiarity of the words, things he’d said to Brienna. They’d been a secret for different reasons, and even now, months later, she felt near enough to intrude in his mind. But Brienna was long gone, and Endi was here, her fingers winding their way through his hair, holding him in a way he never thought he’d be touched again. And for that reason, he let the memory of Bri roll off of his back as he nestled closer to Endi. 

She giggled. “I’m not saying you can’t do all of those things, Chuckles. But I don’t need them.” 

He tilted his head up to find her eyes again just as another golden firework exploded outside, making her irises sparkle. He saw no regret there, no longing for more than he could give. What it was, what they’d done, was apparently enough. She pulled his face to hers, kissing him again. 

“I’m just glad you finally made a move, because I was starting to wonder if I imagined the way you looked at me,” she teased. 

He pulled her hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles. “I wasn’t certain it was appropriate. Given that you’re the kids’ teacher.” 

“Well, we don’t have to tell them. At least not yet.” She laughed again, and the sound reminded Chuckles of windchimes. He smiled, ducking his head bashfully. 

“They’ll figure it out eventually. Arni especially. They don’t miss anything.”

She shrugged. “And when they do, we can talk to them. But for now, I’m fine with meeting you when you can. If that’s only at night after they’re asleep, then you have a place in my bed. And after we tell them, perhaps I’ll have a place in yours.” 

It’s so easy. How is it this easy? 

Chuckles had no idea what to say next. He’d overthought every aspect of what was between him and Endi, but none of his musings had prepared him for this outcome. When not a single word of reply came to him, he kissed her again. “I’m gonna need a bigger bunk.”

Endi giggled, hugging him to her chest. “That’s true, from what you’ve told me. Maybe when you get the kids’ room set up, you can take the bunk they’ve been sharing.” 

“That’s not a half bad idea,” he conceded, smiling up at her. He grazed his nose against hers, gently nuzzling her. “Thank you.”  

She stroked his cheek. “No, thank you. For all of that.” She sat up, closing the clasp on her bra before reaching for his shirt on the floor. “Now, there’ll be time for cuddling and tenderness later, as much as I want it. But we need to get to this fireworks show before it ends and everyone notices our absence. We can still sneak in unnoticed if we hurry.” 

Chuckles kissed her cheek as he pulled his shirt back on. “Yes, ma’am.” 

His legs felt gelatinous as he stood, hurriedly re-doing the buttons on his shirt and tucking it back into his pants as Endi straightened her blouse and smoothed her hair back into a bun before taking a cloth and cleaning between her legs. She looked completely composed in a matter of minutes, and for a moment, Chuckles almost wondered if he’d imagined everything. 

Until she cupped his cock through his pants as she kissed him once more. “Let’s go, Chuckles.” 

He briefly considered bending her over the kitchen counter right then and there, but let the urge pass. 

There’ll be time for that later. And so much more. 

The two of them walked side by side towards the fireworks show, a respectable distance between the two of them that seemed to thrum with electricity. Chuckles wanted to slip his hand into hers, to wrap his arm around her waist and nuzzle against her hair and neck, but he knew he wasn’t ready for everyone else to know just yet. He’d learned quickly that rumors spread through the settlement like wildfire, and his own apprehensions aside, he didn’t want to make Endi the talk of the town. 

And, just for a moment, he wanted whatever was happening to be just theirs. 

They parted ways at the edge of the crowd, Chuckles wandering off to find Arni and Nita as Endi found a place near the back that wouldn’t draw too much attention to her presence. As he cast one last lingering glance over his shoulder, the finale of the fireworks display exploded overhead in a brilliant cacophony of colors and booms. Endi met his eyes, smiling in the way that made his heart flutter in his chest, giving him one last wink before she disappeared from view.

Chuckles couldn’t stop smiling. 

Arni and Nita had joined a group of other children, bouncing and shouting and pointing at the fireworks excitedly as they exploded overhead. Chuckles stood outside the group so as not to intrude, just watching the two younglings that had become his family, his children. He may not have played a part in their creation, but there was nothing he wouldn’t do for them, and he lived to see them happy and safe. 

And they were. 

As the fireworks concluded, Arni and Nita scampered over to Chuckles, excitedly chattering about the show and asking permission to stay out with their friends and get snacks and play games. Chuckles barely interpreted what was being asked, but distributed a handful of credits to each youngling, and they raced away with their friends, leaving a cloud of swirling dust in their wake. He followed after them down a sidestreet that opened up into a wide patch of grass that had been converted into a field of twinkling lights and magnificent smells. A small grouping of stands had been assembled on one end with carnival games and several booths selling crafts or snacks. Strings of lights hung between them, swinging gently in the cool evening breeze. Wooden mismatched tables had been set out for people to lounge at, and in a patch where the grass gave way to hard dirt, a rudimentary dancing area had been set up. Chuckles noted Jerrno and his twin Teef tuning up some strings instruments while Grinz fiddled with a drum. It was simple, but beautiful to him, and he inhaled deeply, closing his eyes and listening to the laughter and chatter of the crowd that had gathered. 

“Jerrno and Teef do a pretty good job, eh?” a familiar voice asked from next to him. Chuck turned to find Anj, Helly, and Lu gathered at one of the tables he was standing near. Helly waved cheerily and pulled her shawl tighter around her shoulders. The weave must have contained every color in the galaxy, but it seemed to fit her perfectly, and Chuckles half wondered if she’d made it herself. Lu tipped the wide brim of the hat he was wearing at Chuckles before sipping from a flask, which he offered. Chuck took the flask, sniffing cautiously before taking a swig and immediately choking. 

“Karking hells, Lu. What is this?”

“Whiskey,” the Nikto replied evenly, the corners of his mouth turning upwards slightly.

Chuck coughed again, shaking his head and handing the flask back. “I’ve had whiskey. Bad whiskey that could take paint off a starcruiser. That’s hyperdrive coolant.” 

Lu huffed a laugh, tipping the flask back into his own mouth without so much as batting an eye. 

“The Kern brothers do the fireworks?” Chuck asked, trying to ignore the watering of his eyes and the burn at the back of his throat. 

“They are demolitions experts by trade,” Helly noted. “These just happen to go upwards. And be prettier.” 

Anj stood and sidled up to Chuckles, eyeing him in a way that made him want to squirm. She leaned closer as Helly started lecturing Lu about the difference between the chemical compositions of the fireworks and the explosives they used in the mine. To his credit, the Nikto was listening intently or doing a very good job of pretending. 

Anj leaned closer to Chuckles, lowering her voice so no one else would hear. “So, seems you missed a good bit of the show,” she noted, giving him a nudge with her shoulder. 

Chuckles hated how easily his face flushed with heat at her observation. He shrugged causally. “Was helping out with some repairs down at the schoolhouse.” 

Anj reached up with a finger and tugged the collar of his shirt aside, revealing a darkening bruise that Chuckles hadn’t even felt Endi leave. “Ah, is that what they’re calling it these days?” she asked, her teeth glinting in the lights. “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.” She winked at him. “Now come on, ask me to dance, Chuckles. It’s only right.” 

“Not much of a dancer,” he muttered, but the Nautolan grabbed him by the arm and dragged him towards the patch of dirt, waving her hand at his protests. 

“Nonsense. I’ll teach you the steps.” She finally spun around to face him, grabbing both of his wrists and dragging him to the middle of the gathering. Chuck felt like his face was going to melt off. He caught a glimpse of Endi at the edge of the crowd, watching him with a playful glint in her eye. 

“Eyes on me, Chuck. I’m your dance partner at the moment,” Anj scolded. “Now, hold my waist like a gentleman.” She pulled his hands to rest on the hips of her coveralls before glancing over at Endi and winking. The Wroonian smiled, watching the two of them as Anj started giving direction. 

“So, you gonna tell me how it happened?” Anj asked, nudging his feet apart further with one of her toes.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Chuck countered, shifting his weight to accommodate her adjustments. 

“Bantha shit. And I won’t push, but you’re no fun,” Anj teased. “Especially when you know my secret. And yours hardly classifies as that with the way you two make eyes at each other every time you're around one another.” 

Anj took a step, and Chuckles mirrored it as she gently tugged him with her. He sighed, lowering his voice. “Alright, fine. Things happened. Quickly. But we’re keeping it quiet until we’re sure it’s serious enough to tell the kids.” He leaned closer. “And I don’t want people to talk about her.” 

“Or you.”

“They already talk about me,” he said quietly, eyeing two figures standing in the crowd that seemed to be meandering towards Endi. It wasn’t hard to identify Kit and Bronce, the two humans on his mining crew. The perpetual scowls they directed at him were easy enough to pick out of a crowd, and he didn’t like how they seemed to be working their way closer to Endi, finally engaging her in conversation. She seemed as though she was being polite enough, but her eyes kept darting over to him. 

Anj followed his line of sight, her smile fading slightly when she caught sight of the two men. “They’re just assholes,” she muttered. “But I appreciate where you’re coming from. Mum’s the word, but for what it’s worth, I’m glad. You needed to let yourself have that happiness.” 

Chuck smiled at Endi, and she grinned back. Kit and Bronce’s glares became more heated as they realized who Endi was watching. Pride roared through Chuckles. 

“I guess you’re right about that,” he agreed. 

“Of course I am. Now watch my toes. Don’t need them getting stomped.”

To her credit, Anj was an exceptional dancer and instructor, and before he knew it, Chuckles knew just enough steps to feel comfortable asking Helly to dance. The Rodian giggled gleefully before accepting, and the two of them whirled each other around to the tune of a lively jig until they collapsed against a table laughing breathlessly. Chuckles noticed that Endi was still talking to the two men, her smile clearly strained. 

“Thanks for the dance, Hells,” he said quietly. “But I think I need to go rescue someone.” 

“I think you’re right,” she agreed, patting him on the shoulder before meandering towards where Anj and Lu were standing. 

Chuckles straightened his shirt and squared his shoulders before making his way over to where Endi stood. A look of relief flickered across her features as she realized he was coming towards her. 

“Evening, gentlemen. Having a good time?” he asked amicably. Kit muttered something unintelligible while Bronce didn’t even bother responding. Chuckles’s grin didn’t falter. “Wonderful. If you don’t mind, I’d like to steal Teacher Endi here for a dance.” He extended his hand. “Anj has been teaching me some steps, so I can guarantee I’m at least half as likely to step on your toes.” 

“At least half? Well, that sounds promising,” she giggled, taking his hand. “Lead the way.” 

Once they were out on the floor, whether by coincidence or by some scheming by Jerrno, Teef, and Grinz, the tempo slowed. Chuckles glanced over his shoulder at where the band was setup, but neither Latero nor the Ugnaut would make eye contact with him. 

What a bunch of meddling mynocks.

Endi appeared to note the very deliberate glances around as well, but she still stepped closer as other couples filed out to dance. Chuckles recognized a few sets of parents that had helped with Arni’s birthday around them, and he had to stifle a grin when he saw Anj gently pull Helly to her feet and lead her out to dance. Helly’s expression mingled somewhere between shock and sheer joy, and Anj looked downright giddy. 

“Did you slip the band some credits?” Endi whispered in a tone that was anything but accusatory. 

“Oh, I didn’t have to. It appears almost everyone is conspiring to get us together,” Chuckles murmured as he rested his hands on her waist. 

“Well unfortunately for them, they’re too late to contribute to that effort,” she giggled softly, draping her arms over Chuckles’s shoulders. He felt his face flush at the way she was looking at him, her golden eyes twinkling in the festival lights, a deep purple hue starting to spread across her cheeks. 

“Are you blushing, Teacher Endi?” he teased. 

“And what if I was?” she asked, swaying in his grip in time with the tempo. 

“I might take it as a form of flattery,” he whispered, stepping a few centimeters closer. 

Her eyes darted around nervously. “I thought you wanted to keep this quiet for a bit,” she said under her breath. 

“I do. And we’re just dancing,” he murmured. “I danced with Anj and Helly already. Two people can just dance.” 

“And what if I asked you to walk me home?” she asked, raising an eyebrow in challenge. 

He felt the heat creeping up the back of his neck, and his cock twitched with interest at what her request implied. He leaned closer to whisper directly into her ear, his hand creeping around her waist. 

“I’d think you might be propositioning me, Endoline.” 

Her voice was breathy as she whispered back. “And if I was?”

“Then I’d have no choice but to ensure you make it home safely.”

“Is that all?” 

“Well, I suppose I could stay for a while longer,” he hummed teasingly. “Take my time. Make sure you’re taken care of.”   

She pulled back, and he could see the flush had fully enveloped her cheeks, highlighting the dark blue freckles that peppered her skin. 

“What will Anj think?” she joked, her voice still breathy. 

Chuckles glanced around to make sure no one was looking or listening before he tugged his shirt aside. Endi’s eyes widened, and she reached up to quickly cover the bruise she’d left. Chuckles grinned. “Anj won’t think much unless you keep leaving marks like that on me.” 

“I-I didn’t know I did that.”

“I didn’t either, but nothing gets past Anj,” he snickered. “Don’t worry. She’s promised to be discreet. And said she’s happy for us.”

Endi smiled slightly. “I’m happy for us as well,” she whispered. 

“Me too,” Chuckles agreed. He resisted the urge to kiss her again in that moment, tempted further by the way her eyes flicked down to his lips before returning to his eyes. 

Patience.

He danced and drank and laughed more than he had in the months since the war ended. Nita and Arni twirled and danced with their friends as the evening’s festivities continued. Chuckles’s heart warmed as he watched the two children laugh and scream with delight. Several hours later, a weary Nita shuffled over to him with drooping eyelids. 

“‘M sleepy,” she mumbled before being overcome by a face-splitting yawn. “Can we go home?” 

Chuckles glanced over at Endi apologetically. She only allowed a slight flicker of disappointment to cascade across her face before she put her smile back into place, giving him a nod. 

“Helly and I can make sure the kids get home,” Anj offered, clearly noting the unspoken apology passing between Endi and Chuckles. “I’d hate to break up whatever’s happening over there anyway.” Chuckles glanced over to where she’d indicated, and saw Helly and Arni talking animatedly, both of their eyes sparkling. Lu was quietly watching, smoking a pipe he’d also apparently brought with him and nodding when he was occasionally consulted by either the Twi’lek or the Rodian for his input. 

“Are you sure?” Chuckles asked. 

Anj’s teeth glinted. “Not a problem.” She leaned closer to whisper to him. “But you owe me one.” With that, she scooped up Nita in her arms, and the little Pantoran was asleep before she’d made it ten steps, gathering Lu, Helly, and Arni and heading towards the Starlight. 

Chuckles and Endi didn’t wait too much longer to make their exit, not wanting to wait for the festival to end and get caught in the crowd. Leaving early reduced the chances they’d draw too much attention to the fact that they were leaving together. Chuckles did his best to keep his pace unhurried as they strolled back towards the schoolhouse, Lothal’s twin moons lighting their way. They kept that same respectable distance between the two of them, but this time, that space felt charged with the expectations of what they both knew would come when they reached the privacy of Endi’s apartment. 

“So, you’re the only teacher that lives at the schoolhouse then?” Chuckles noted, making an attempt at small talk to fill the silence. 

“I am. The other two teachers are both married and have their own residences. I was lucky that there was enough material and willing individuals to build that apartment onto the back. It used to just be a storage area, but Grinz was able to get enough supplies to make it a cozy dwelling.”

“That’s nice,” Chuckles agreed, ignoring the heat that was creeping up the back of his neck slightly. 

“It is,” she agreed. 

They walked for a few more minutes before she stepped a little closer. “You know, you called me Endoline while we were dancing. I believe that’s the first time you’ve called me by my full name,” she said softly. “Most everyone here calls me Endi.”

“Was it alright?” he asked, suddenly concerned he’d crossed a line. 

She giggled, placing a reassuring hand on his forearm. It felt like his skin was on fire where her fingers touched him. 

“I think I like it when you call me that,” she said. “There’s something more… intimate about it. Less informal. If that makes sense.” 

Chuckles smiled, placing his hand on top of hers. “Well, then I may use it more. If that’s alright. It’s a beautiful name.” 

Endi ducked her head, leaning against him slightly as the schoolhouse came into view. “I’d like that.” 

Chuckles felt his pulse quicken as they drew nearer to the building, his cock already half-hard in his pants as he thought of what they’d done earlier in that inside. And what they’d do in the hours to come. 

“How long will you stay?” she whispered to him, snapping him away from his fantasies. 

“As long as you want me to. Just should be home before the kids wake up.”

She grinned wickedly. “Well then, let’s not waste any time.” Glancing around to make sure no one was around, she slipped her hand into his and led him around the side of the building to the rear entrance into her apartment. Chuckles’s hands wandered to her waist as she keyed the unlock code into the door’s keypad, and he felt her shudder and giggle as he leaned in to bury his nose in her hair, inhaling deeply. 

“Karking hells, you’re gorgeous,” he hummed. 

Endi laughed breathlessly as she stepped inside, pulling him after her and locking the door behind them. 

He followed her through the dark apartment to her bedroom, quietly closing the door behind them as she turned to face him. They stood watching one another for a moment, the small room seemingly crackling with anticipation, but there was no urgency this time, no rush to sate the need they’d both been repressing. Endi had already confirmed that they felt the same, that she wanted him as much as he did her. Still, there was almost a hesitation on Chuck’s part, as if he might wake up at any moment back aboard the Starlight or make a misstep that would send them flying apart. 

It was all still so new, and they were still figuring things out about each other. And that made it even more exciting. 

Endi made the first move, closing the distance between them and kissing him tenderly. 

“I believe you promised to make sure I was taken care of,” she mumbled against his lips, allowing her arms to drift over his shoulders so that she could play with his hair.

Chuckles grinned. “Well, Endoline, if there’s one thing you should know about me, it’s that I always keep my promises,” he rasped, resting his hands on her hips and walking her backwards towards her bed until the backs of her knees brushed against it. He undid the clasps of her blouse, pushing the garment off of her shoulders as he nosed at the skin of her throat. Her hands fumbled to undo the buttons of his shirt again, her touch still sending lightning through his veins when her fingers found his skin once more. They undressed each other eagerly until they both stood bare to one another, kissing in the cool air of Endi’s bedroom as their hands explored one another. Chuckles felt her shiver under his fingertips as his hands traced her spine. 

“Are you cold?” he asked softly. 

“A little. But more excited. And nervous for some reason,” she whispered back with a wavering breath. 

“Nothin’ to be nervous about,” he rumbled, kissing her again. “We’ve already done this once.”

“That was different.”

“It was,” he conceded. “But I still care as much about you now as I did then, and I plan to properly show you that. Now lay back on the bed for me, love.” 

Endi sat down, the mattress, her eyes never leaving his. She started to scoot back towards the pillows, but Chuckles knelt down, gripping her legs just behind the knee and pulling her back towards the edge of the bed. Endi appeared confused for a moment until understanding dawned on her features, her eyes darkening considerably. 

“You don’t have-”

“I want to,” he cut her off. “Wanted to taste you damn near since I laid eyes on you. Now lay back and let me take care of you.” 

Endi leaned back on her elbows, allowing her knees to fall open as Chuckles scooped under her ass, pulling her closer to the edge of the mattress. Her cunt was already glistening in the room’s dim lighting, an invitation he was more than willing to accept. He pulled her legs over his shoulders and, keeping his eyes on hers, he lowered his mouth to her, hovering for just a moment to allow his warm breath to graze her folds and clit. Endi whined, and he smirked. 

“D-don’t tease,” she gasped. “Or I’ll regret letting you walk me home.” 

“Yes ma’am,” he rasped before licking a long, flat stripe up her slit. Endi’s head tipped back, and he watched the curve of her throat bob with a hard swallow. He traced her slit slowly with his tongue, working his way inside of her before gently suckling at her clit. The next pass, he pressed deeper inside of her, tasting the tang of her arousal and something else familiar and salty. He’d tasted himself before on Brienna’s lips and tongue after she’d let him finish in her mouth, something she relished in. Now, his cock strained in his pants as he realized he was tasting himself again, remnants of his spend that he’d left inside of Endi hours ago, staking his claim on her. 

She had me leaking out of her when Kit and Bronce were talking to her, thinking they had a chance. But I’d already claimed her, already had her whining my name and pleading with me to let her cum. And she probably felt it, felt me inside of her as she stood there listening to them. 

She was already mine. 

Chuckles wasn’t normally possessive or territorial when it came to lovers, but something about having Endi be unsuccessfully pursued by those that had shown him such open disdain when she’d already chosen him made his cock throb. He groaned into her cunt, and Endi’s hands found his mohawk, gripping tightly as she braced her heels on the edge of the bed and began grinding up into his face. 

Pride ripped through Chuckles as he thought of Kit and Bronce and every natborn like them that had ever made a comment about clones not knowing their way around a bedroom, some even questioning if they had the anatomy to please a lover. 

They can think what they want. They’ll never have a woman like this riding their tongue. 

His fingers dug into her hips as he drove his tongue into her, tasting the combination of his spend and her arousal, coating his chin and lips with her. Endi’s grinding grew more insistent, and the roots of his mohawk creaked in protest between her fingers, spurring him on. He buried his face in her, closing his eyes and losing himself in her. 

“Ch-Chuckles,” Endi gasped. “I’m close. I-I-I’m so close.” 

He opened his eyes and almost came untouched at the sight of Endi, one hand braced against the wall, pushing herself towards him, her head tipped back and lips pursed in pleasure as her chest heaved. Her blue skin was flushed with heat and desire, and sweat beading at the roots of her dark curls as the tendons in her throat strained, her mouth opening in a silent scream. He nosed at her clit as he fucked her with his tongue, and she whined high in her throat, pushing the swollen bundle of nerves against him again. 

“P-p-please,” she begged. “Please.”

He hummed into her again before latching onto her clit and sucking, and she came hard, soaking his chin and chest as her eyes rolled back into her head. Her orgasm ripped a guttural groan from her that wrung her out and left her trembling in his grip. Her hold on his hair loosened, her fingers sliding around to the back of his head and pulling him firmly towards her so that she could kiss him breathlessly. 

“More,” she gasped. “I n-need more. Please.” 

“Well since you asked so nicely, it would be rude of me to refuse,” Chuckles teased, despite the fact that his cock was painfully hard and weeping. Endi reached down to stroke him as he gently shifted her to lay on the pillows, pulling the blankets over the top of them. 

“I need you inside me,” Endi whined. 

“Oh, you’ll have me, Endoline,” Chuckles reassured her, stroking her hair as he slotted his hips between her legs, the head of his cock catching her clit and drawing another gasp from her. He reached down, his knuckles grazing her folds as he notched himself at her entrance, gently pressing the head of his cock inside of her. “Gonna take my time though.” He gently pushed his hips forward, and he slid into her easily, bottoming out in only a few thrusts. 

“Maker above, you’re so warm and tight,” he rasped against her neck, reaching up to interlace his fingers with hers on the pillow above her head. “But you’re so soft, how can you be that soft and perfect? I’d keep my cock buried in you forever if I could.” His mouth was running now, unable to stop the words from pouring out as he set a gradual pace punctuated with thrusts that seemed to go impossibly deep inside of her, brushing her back wall. 

“Y-you’re so big,” she whined. “I can feel you everywhere.” 

“You like my cock, love?” he prompted, gripping her hip to give himself more leverage as he pushed as deep as he could inside of her. “Like feeling me inside of you?” 

“It’s perfect,” she moaned, clenching around him. “It’s so good. So good.” 

“Tell me how good,” he demanded, grazing his teeth against her neck again. “Tell me how good I’m fucking you, Endoline.” 

“No one’s ever fucked me like this, Chuckles. Gods above, please don’t stop.”

“I won’t. I’m gonna make sure you remember this every step you take tomorrow. Every time you move, I want you to feel me.” He sucked another bruise into the tender flesh of her breast. “Every time you see yourself in the mirror, I want you to think of me.” He took her earlobe between his teeth, biting gently as she arched into his touch and whined again. “I want you to think of how my cock felt buried in your perfect pussy and how I’m going to do it again and again, as long as you’ll let me.” 

He pulled another orgasm from her in a matter of minutes, and then she was moving, pushing him onto his back so she could ride him. Chuckles let her lead, allowing her to straddle his hips, grinding herself insistently down into the patch of hair at the base of his cock. Her hands braced against his chest as she increased her pace, grinding harder and harder until she started to tighten around him again. He pulled her down into a heated kiss as her fingernails dug into his chest. 

“Give me another one, gorgeous. I want to see you cum on my cock again.” He snapped his hips into her, and she fell forward, her breasts dangling just in front of his face. Reaching up, he took a nipple between his lips and sucked. Endi’s fingers flew to the back of his head, cradling him against her as she met his thrusts, moaning loudly as her cunt tightened around him. 

“Gods, Chuckles. I’m going to cum.” 

“Yeah, you are. Cum for me, Endoline.” 

The sound of her name on his lips seemingly pulled her over the edge, and she came, screaming against his lips. Chuckles thought that would be the end for her, that she’d be too tired to continue, but after a few seconds of rest, Endi slipped off of him, falling into her hands and knees. 

“Take me like this, Chuckles. I want you to finish.”

“Endi, I-”

“Fuck me, Chuckles. Please fuck me.” She wiggled her ass in invitation. “I need you to fill me again.” 

Sweat trickled from Chuckles’s brow as he took in her cunt, clenching around nothing and presented to him wantonly. Endi’s golden eyes were pleading as she looked over her shoulder at him, her lower lip caught between her teeth. “Please,” she begged. “I need it. I want to feel you finish inside of me. I want to feel it drip back out again.” 

So she did feel it. She felt me inside of her as those men talked to her.

And she’s asking for more. 

Chuckles was already mounting her before his brain could think anything else, his hand bracing on the small of her back as he nudged her knees apart to accommodate his own. With his other hand, he guided his cock inside of her with ease, and Endi’s back arched as he filled her again, her head falling forward onto the mattress. 

“Take me,” she whispered. “I’m yours.”

“Yeah you are,” he rasped, snapping his hips forward. “All mine.” 

He gripped her hips, watching where he disappeared inside of her, the lips of her pussy wrapping around his shaft as he pulled back, and then disappearing as their bodies collided again with a firm snap of his hips. Her ass rippled against him with each thrust, and after a few minutes, he could feel her meeting his thrusts. Glancing up, he noted a small mirror in one corner, tucked behind the door and normally hidden. In it, he could see Endi’s expressions, the pinch between her brows and the flush in her cheeks as he fucked her. 

I’m making her feel like that. I’m giving her that pleasure.

His grip on her hips tightened, and she readjusted, crying out. 

“Oh, FUCK. Right there, Chuckles. Don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop…” Her chanting devolved into unintelligible babbling punctuated by the occasional swear word as his thrusts grew more sharp. He bore down on the place inside of her, feeling the head of his cock brush it with every snap of his hips. The way her cunt was tightening around him made his breath catch in his throat. 

“‘M close, Endi. I’m gonna fill you up.” 

“Please, please, please, please…” her begging grew more insistent as she choked his cock. He felt her reach between her legs, and he thought she might play with her clit until he felt her fingers graze his balls, sliding along his shaft as he pulled back out of her slightly.

“Oh f-fuck,” he groaned, and his orgasm overwhelmed him. “F-fuck. FUCK.”

He emptied himself inside of her with a whimper, his ears flooded with the sound of his pulse and Endi’s muffled screams. He barely managed to get a hand out to brace against the wall as each pulse of his cock yanked another gasp from him. His orgasm seemed to last forever, wringing him out until his ears felt cottony and his mouth felt dry. He managed to not collapse on top of her, instead falling backwards onto the pillows as his eyes rolled towards the ceiling. Endi didn’t move, seemingly also struggling to recover as her back rose and fell with deep, gasping breaths. Chuckles saw some of his spend leak back out from between her puffy, swollen lips, and that same pride warmed him again. 

She let me do that to her. She chose me.

Finding the rag on the floor that she’d cleaned herself with earlier, he gently wiped between her legs. She shuddered at first, trying to wave him off. 

“You don’t have-”

“Shhh,” he whispered. “I know I don’t. I want to.” 

She relented, and he carefully cleaned her before he gently repositioned her to lay back on the pillows next to him. They were both sweaty and sticky and warm, but she snuggled into the crook of his shoulder anyway, releasing a content sigh as she draped her leg over his. 

“That was fantastic,” she whispered, kissing his shoulder. “Glad I let you walk me home.” 

He pushed some of her curls out of her face before pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Me too. We should do this again sometime.” 

“As often as you can,” she agreed. “I think I’d like to keep you around if that’s alright with you.”

“I suppose I can get onboard with that,” he joked, and she slapped him lightly. Slipping his fingers under her chin, he raised her mouth to his. “In all seriousness, I care for you, Endoline. Very much.” 

“I didn’t know you could be serious,” she replied teasingly. “And I care for you as well, Chuckles. Just as much.” 

He smiled, and for the first time since the end of the war, he felt his entire body relax. The tension that normally resided in his neck and shoulders seemed to have melted away. He’d grown so accustomed to it, he only now noticed its absence. Chuckles knew it was early still, that a thousand things could go wrong to change the way he and Endi felt about one another, but right now, all he felt was a thrilling warmth, a kind of comfort he hadn’t felt since the last time he’d been in bed with Brienna, one he thought he might not find again and had hardly considered pursuing in the aftermath of the war. He’d never anticipated finding someone that looked at him like this again, that kissed him like this, and yet here Endi was, snuggled against his side and relaxed. 

His cheeks hurt from the smile that felt permanently affixed when he was with her. He glanced down at Endi, who was absently trailing her fingers across his chest, tracing his scars and smiling with hooded eyes. 

“How long can you stay?” she asked. 

“I’ll stay as long as I can,” he whispered. 

“I’d like that. But I understand you’ll have to go at some point.”

“I will, but it won’t be like that forever. When we’re both comfortable with telling people, then I’ll be all yours.” 

“I thought you already were,” she teased. Her eyes were sparkling as she met his. 

“You know, I think you might be right,” Chuckles agreed. One word echoed in his mind as he watched her snuggle closer against him, her eyes drifting closed. 

Settled. 

Finally settled.

Tag List: @seriowan @partoftheeternalsoul @rosmariner @misogirl828 @ellichonkasaurusrex @zoeykallus @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @staycalmandhugaclone @redheadgirl @fordo-kixed-rex @wizardofrozz @ariadnes-red-thread @justanothersadperson93 @leftealeaf @kaminocasey @echos-girlfriend @lucyysthings @obihiddlenox @merkitty49 @littlemissmanga @clonecyaree @baba-fett @sleepingsun501 @rexxdjarin @samspenandsword @babygirlrex0504 @ladytano420 @fxlsealarm @runforrestr @djarrex @corrieguards @the-cantina @witchklng @wolffegirlsunite @fives-lover @rain-on-kamino @ladykatakuri @arctrooper69 @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall

#karrde writes #one step at a time #osaat #OC Chuckles #OC Arni #OC Nita #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Nita Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #found family #slow burn #kinda #angst #whump #clone OC #Jedi OC

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 11

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: HI HELLO I HAVE RETURNED WITH A NEW CHAPTER! This one's been in the works for a while, and I am SO VERY excited to finally share it. STRAP IN FOR AN EXORBITANT AMOUNT OF DOMESTIC FLUFF. As always, thank you to the wonderful @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta-reading this chapter for me and getting me so very excited to post it!!!!

Chapter Rating: T

Warnings: mention of domestic violence/abuse, language

Word Count: 8.4k words

Chuckles hardly slept that night, his mind swirling between worry that he’d forgotten something for the surprise party, or that Arni had figured out their plan. When he wasn’t worrying, images of dark curls, golden eyes, purple flushed cheeks, and the smell of cinnamon and vanilla haunted his dreams. 

Once he’d extricated himself from the desk, his goodbye to Endi had been cordial and brief enough. There had been a moment though where their eyes had lingered just a touch too long, and for a millisecond, he’d wondered if she wanted him to kiss her. 

Too fast. Too soon. 

He’d opted to squeeze her upper arm instead, which felt stupid in hindsight. In the moment, he’d left so quickly, he’d forgotten Arni’s gifts were still in her apartment. He’d sent her a message when he’d gotten back to the Starlight and realized, and she’d replied not to worry about it, that she’d have them ready for him tomorrow. 

You’re such an idiot. For so many reasons. 

The kids had only beaten him home by a little, and he’d worked up an excuse about needing to chat with Anj about the schedule next week to explain his absence. Arni had never questioned it, instead opting to regale him with their adventure from that day. Of course, they hadn’t found the mother tooka or her kits, but they’d still managed to find some very interesting insects and flowers, all of which Arni had documented in their journal in careful detail. 

After dinner, Arni went to shower, and Chuckles used that opportunity to fill Nita in on the plan for the following day. He had to shush her when she squealed with excitement about her designated position as Head of Decorations. 

“It’s gonna be so great and they’re gonna be so surprised,” she whispered loudly. 

“They absolutely are. Just make sure you don’t spill the beans before then, kiddo.” 

Nita pulled her fingers across her lips as though she was zipping them shut and then offered Chuckles her pinky, which he locked with his. 

Now, as the sun was just beginning to trickle in through the viewport, signaling the dawn of the next day, Chuckles could already hear the tiny Pantoran shifting around in the bunk. He’d figured she’d be up early from the excitement, and had to chew the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing when he heard her wake up Arni. The Twi’lek was muttering under their breath when they emerged from the shared bunk, readjusting their headgear as they trudged towards the kitchenette. Chuckles reached over for his commlink, firing off a quick message to Helly and receiving an almost instant response. He grinned. 

She may be just as excited as Nita. 

The little Pantoran was already bouncing at his elbow as he rolled over in his bunk. Her golden eyes were sparkling with excitement, and her grin was threatening to split her face in half. 

“They don’t suspect anything!” she whispered loudly. 

“Let’s keep it that way then. Helly’s on her way over, so you gotta keep it under wraps for just a little bit longer, ok?” 

Nita saluted him. “Yes, sir.” 

“Good, now go eat breakfast. It’s gonna be a busy day as soon as Arni and Helly leave.” 

Nita bounded off immediately, her trooper doll dangling at her side. Chuckles just managed to get a quick shower in and get dressed before there was an eager rap at the side hatch of the ship. He opened it hurriedly to find Helly standing there with a helmet and respirator in her arms, accompanied by Anj, who was also carrying a few tidbits of gear. Chuck shot the Nautolan an inquisitive look, and she shrugged. 

“GOOD MORNING CHUCKLES! I’VE COME BY TO DELIVER YOUR NEW GEAR FOR THE MINE!” Helly announced loudly.

“Maker alive Helly, tone it down or the kids are going to think they’re under attack,” Anj muttered with a smirk. 

The Rodian ducked her head shyly. “Sorry,” she whispered. “Just wanna sell it.” 

Chuckles stepped back, inviting them both inside the ship. Helly was practically vibrating as she handed him the gear. Anj set her box down, her dark eyes flitting about the ship, taking in the place Chuckles and the kids lived. 

“Nice place. Corellian?”

“Yeah. Got it for cheap,” Chuckles replied with a shrug. 

A dull thud in the corner made the three of them turn. Arni was trying to shyly shuffle past, and when all three sets of eyes turned on them, their cheeks flushed a dark blue. 

“S-sorry. I-I was just gonna get my sketchbook.”

“Arni, this is Helly and Anj. I work with them down at the mine.”

“Yeah! And we’re just stopping by to drop off some of his new gear!” Helly declared, still a little loudly. 

“What’s this about a sketchbook?” Anj asked gently, clearly trying to deflect some of Helly’s enthusiasm. 

Arni ducked their head bashfully. “I like to draw the plants and animals of the places we visit. It’s kind of like a science journal.” 

Anj crouched down. “That sounds very interesting. May I see it?” Her voice was softer than Chuckles had ever thought her capable of. 

The Twi’lek retrieved their sketchbook and satchel of colored pencils from their bunk, shyly handing it out to the tattooed Nautolan. Anj gave them a toothy smile before she started thumbing through the pages. 

“These are very good, Arni. You’ve got quite the eye for detail.”

It was so subtle that Chuckles almost missed it, but Arni’s spine straightened a little, their mouth twitching upwards at the corners. 

Anj paused on one page, pointing at the sketch of an orange flower with pink pistil and stamens. “This one’s gorgeous. Can’t say I’ve seen it around here before.” 

Chuckles immediately recognized the bloom, and his heart twisted in his chest as Arni’s expression fell slightly. “That was a flower on Sorgan. We used to live there.” 

“I see,” Anj said quietly, clearly understanding there was still lingering grief. “Have you sketched anything since you got here?” 

Arni nodded, stepping closer to flip forward a few pages. Anj grinned as she took in the sketches of the tooka they’d seen the first night they landed. When she turned the page again, Chuckles felt heat rush to his cheek as familiar golden eyes stared back at him from the sketchbook. 

“Ah, I recognize this one,” Anj said. “That’s an excellent likeness of Teacher Endi.”

“I’m just starting to try out portraits,” Arni admitted, their posture straightening further as a hint of pride tinged their voice. “I’m not great at proportions yet though.”

“Just takes practice, I’m sure,” Anj replied. She flipped another page to find the drawing of a small beetle. “Hey, Helly, don’t you have a specimen of this one in your collection?” she asked, giving Chuckles a subtle wink. 

Helly leaned over her shoulder. “You know, I think I might.” 

Just as Chuckles hoped, Arni took the bait. “You collect bugs?” 

“And flora as well. I do some sketching myself if you’d like to see.” 

“She’s being modest,” Anj teased. “Helly here has had a few of her drawings published in some very prestigious science journals.” 

Arni’s eyes were bugging out of their face in admiration. “Whoa.”

It was Helly’s turn to flush with pride. “I’d love to show you, if you’ve got some time. I’d also like to pick your brain on how you did the fur on that tooka drawing. I can never get it to look right.” 

“Right now?”

Helly nodded. “Today’s our day off, and I don’t have any plans. If it’s ok with your dad, of course.” 

“CAN I CHUCKLES?”

Even if they hadn’t been trying to pull off a surprise birthday party, there was no way Chuckles was going to tell Arni ‘no’, not with the way their eyes were lit up. It was the most excited he’d seen them in recent memory, maybe since Sorgan. 

“Absolutely, kid.” 

Arni could hardly contain their glee as they raced to the bunk to retrieve their boots and satchel. Chuckles leaned over to whisper to Helly. “Remember, no earlier than midday. That’ll give us enough time to get everything set up.” 

She winked at him with one of her large eyes. “You got it, boss.” 

“Ready?” Arni was already at Helly’s side. 

“Let’s go!” she giggled. 

The two of them practically raced out of the ship, chattering at one another about what types of bugs Helly liked to collect and what type of pencils Arni preferred for different techniques. When their excited voices finally faded in the distance, Anj straightened and grinned at Chuckles.

“That was easy enough.”

“I thought you were gonna meet us at the school house.” 

The Nautolan shrugged. “Thought it would be best to come along and help reign Helly in. Subtlety has never been her strong suit.” 

“Are they gone?” a small voice asked from behind them. Chuckles whirled around to find Nita peeking out from the kitchenette. 

“Yeah, honey, they’re gone,” Chuckles confirmed, but Nita was hardly paying attention to him. Her large golden eyes were firmly locked on Anj, taking her in. Anj didn’t seem to mind, returning to her crouched position. “And who might you be?” 

The little Pantoran edged forward. “Nita,” she said softly. “I like your tattoos.” 

Chuckles was flabbergasted. He’d never seen Nita be timid around anyone before. 

Anj didn’t seem to mind, chuckling. “They make me look tough so guys like your dad know I’m in charge.” She tossed another wink at Chuck. 

Nita approached her, and Anj leaned her arm closer to show off some of her more intricate ink. “Got that one done when I moved to this settlement,” she said, pointing at a series of squiggles that Chuck suddenly realized were meant to portray the plains of grass and rock formations that surrounded the settlement. It was a bit abstract for his taste, but still undeniably beautiful. Nita reached out to touch it, her tiny fingers tracing the lines dark lines that swirled over Anj’s grey skin.

“It’s really pretty.”

“I think so too.”

“Chuckles has a big tattoo on his back.”

“Does he now?” Anj raised an eyebrow at Chuck. “He never told me.”

“It’s one of the circuit boards in the ship he flew during the war. It’s very confusing, but still cool.” 

Anj grinned at her again. “Sometimes, those are the best ones.” 

Nita giggled for a moment before her eyes fell on one of Anj’s shortened tendrils. “What happened?” she asked quietly, pointing at the damage. 

Anj’s smile faltered slightly, but it didn’t slip from her face entirely. “Oh this? This was a lesson.”

“Did it hurt?”

“It did. Quite a bit, actually. But I learned from it, and will never let it happen again. It’s a good reminder to not repeat the same mistake twice.” 

Nita nodded, apparently satisfied with that answer. “I’m sorry you got hurt.” 

Anj’s grin warmed again. “Ah, don’t be, little one. It makes me look a little tougher anyway. Would you want to mess with a Nautolan that had some tendrils missing?” 

Nita returned her smile. “Definitely not. But you’re nice.” 

“Don’t tell anyone,” Anj whispered behind her hand conspiratorially. 

“I won’t,” Nita whispered loudly back. 

Anj pushed herself to her feet. “Right. Should we get to it then? I understand you’re in charge of the decor, and we must make sure you have enough time to create a masterpiece.” 

Nita’s face grew more serious, and she nodded firmly. “Let’s go then.” 

Anj bowed low, extending her arms towards the door as her tendrils dangled past her knees. “Lead the way, oh fearless Head of Decorations.” 

Nita squared her shoulders and marched out the hatch. Chuckles had to dig his teeth into his cheek to keep from bursting out laughing at her. 

“She’s a cutie,” Anj teased, nudging him with her shoulder. “It’s a wonder she doesn’t get away with everything.”

“Who says she doesn’t?” he snickered under his breath. 

— 

The walk to the schoolhouse was brief, but Chuckles was glad for the time with Anj. He hadn’t had much time to get to know her during working hours, but he’d felt an instant sense of camaraderie with her. A small part of him wondered if it was because she reminded him of Ry a little bit. Anj hung back and kept pace with him as Nita galloped ahead of the two of them, kicking up swirls of dust in her wake as she chased various insects or inspected weeds growing along the path. 

“You know, at first, I didn’t see the family resemblance,” the Nautolan joked. “But I think maybe I do now. She’s got your sense of humor.”

“I’d like to think hers is better.”

“Oh, undoubtedly,” she agreed. 

“So, you have any family out here?” Chuckles asked. “No offense, but I was surprised to find a Nautolan on a world that’s got so little water.”

Anj toed a rock with her boot. “No one blood related. Was orphaned as a kid and have been on my own since then. Ventured out on my fifteenth year and never really looked back.” She pulled her tendrils together over her shoulder. “But, I made family where I could. I think this is the most settled I’ve felt since I left Glee Anselm. Took me twenty years to find a place that felt like home, but here we are.” She widened her steps to lean over and nudge his shoulder with hers again. “I hope you can find the same here. I know it’s not exactly as glamorous as Coruscant or as green as Sorgan, but the people here are good. Mostly.” 

Chuckles was pretty sure the exceptions included the two human men on their crew, although he didn’t voice it. They’d kept their distance from him during the first week, and any interactions that were absolutely necessary were terse and to the point. He wasn’t about to make waves, but he did wonder what the root of the issue was. He imagined it was the fact that he was a clone, but wasn’t going to start pointing fingers without evidence. It could be they just didn’t like him, and that wasn’t anything new, but that opinion seemed to have been formed before he’d even opened his mouth or been given the opportunity to do anything. 

“I hope we can too,” Chuckles agreed. “The kids need to be settled.” 

“And you?”

“I’m a bit more adjustable to what life throws at me.” 

“Seems like life probably threw a lot at you,” Anj noted, her eyes focused on his scar. “Seems you’ve learned some lessons that hurt like hell too.” 

He tapped the scar. “Always wear your helmet while flying a Headhunter, and always check the eject handle before leaving the hangar.” He couldn’t stop his eyes from flicking to her shortened tendrils. “Your lesson was to tie those back when working, right? That’s why you do that before we go down in the mine.” 

“Actually, my lesson was don’t sleep with someone that responds to ‘no’s’ with knives,” Anj joked with a forced levity. Chuckles’s stomach wrenched at the thought, but Anj smiled at him. “But yeah, after doing that, I wasn’t about to get another one lopped off by mining equipment or caught somewhere and ripped off. It is one of the most painful thing a Nautolan can experience. Some don’t survive losing one.” 

Chuckles counted three shortened tendrils, and his throat felt suddenly tighter.

“Anj-”

“You’re not going to be able to think of the words to say, so don’t say anything,” she cut him off with a wave of her hand. “I don’t want pity. I learned. It was a hard lesson, but I know the warning signs and I know what I won’t accept from someone I love. I’ve found peace and someone…”

Her voice trailed off, but Chuckles instantly understood. 

“You walked over with Helly because you were already with her,” he said quietly. 

Anj’s eyes were fixed on the ground and her cheeks seemed to be flushed a darker shade of grey. Chuck almost giggled at how flustered the rugged Nautolan looked. “Keep it to yourself, yeah? It’s… it’s new. And I don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea,” she whispered. 

“You got it.”

They walked in silence for a few more minutes, the only sounds the fluttering of the grasses in the breeze, their footsteps crunching against the rocks and dust, and Nita’s occasional excited exclamation. A gentle breeze fluttered through Chuck’s hair, and he tipped his face back, letting the sun warm his cheeks. 

Settled.

The word sounded nice to him. He’d almost felt that way on Sorgan, and maybe with time, he could have. He’d almost stopped looking over his shoulder when the Empire had arrived. But here, now, knowing that the clone army had been disbanded and he was allowed to just exist, it seemed like they had more of a chance. The community had embraced them for the most part, and it felt like as long as they kept Nita and Arni’s Force sensitivity secret, that maybe, just maybe, they could make this place their home, that they could feel settled. 

Glancing over at Anj, he could see a comfort in her that he craved for himself and the younglings. Her shoulders were relaxed, her eyes weren’t constantly checking for threats around them; she just was. She’d been through as much as he had, maybe even more, and yet here she stood, part of a community on a planet she arguably had no business being on. 

We could make this work.

“I know I’m a looker and all, but you’re staring, Chuck.”

Heat rushed to his face as he fought to recover. “Sorry. I just… I didn’t expect you to be so good around kids.” 

Anj shrugged one shoulder. “Had a younger sister back on Glee Anselm. About a decade separated us. She was an unexpected surprise for my family, but such a light.” Her eyes glistened slightly as she stared after Nita. Chuckles hadn’t missed her use of past tense, but opted not to press it. “She and Lola would have been great friends,” Anj said softly. “She was just as excited about life as that one.” 

“She’s something else,” Chuckles agreed. 

“Her parents?”

“Never knew ‘em. Same for Arni. They were alone, and so was I.” He sighed. “There’s a thing about clones and kids. When you’re training to be a soldier from the moment you come out of your tube, it’s hard. The trainers were rarely sympathetic, and the Kaminoans mostly viewed us as science experiments, so all we had were each other. The older we got, the more protective we grew of the younger cadets. I was one of the early gens, so I didn’t have many older brothers to look up to, but the ones that I did were the closest thing I had to family. When I saw those two, I saw my younger brothers, in need of a family and comfort when life had been hard. And if I’m honest, I needed them just as much. Just didn’t realize it at the time.” His chest was unexpectedly tight, and his voice cracked slightly. 

Anj was watching him. 

“Who’s staring now?” he joked. 

“Fair. I just guess I never thought about what growing up was like for you. Makes me feel like more of an ass for my jokes the first day.” 

“I always figured that was the point, to make us seem less than human so that we’d feel more expendable,” Chuckles replied. “It’s easy not to get invested in our lives when you know so little about us other than we were created to fight, that we were grown in tubes instead of wombs, that we age twice as fast as you. I’ve heard everything from theories that we don’t feel pain to theories that we’re experimental droids with flesh covering our gears. Hell, I’ve even had someone try to explain what sex was to me in a bar once because they figured I didn’t know anything other than how to be a soldier. Told him his mother seemed to think I knew what I was doing the night before. He didn’t take that well.” 

The joke landed, bringing the levity that he’d hoped for. Anj laughed quietly. 

“You’ve got a pretty pleasant disposition in spite of it all.”

“Didn’t always. But it was either adjust or put a fist through every natborn face that looked at me funny. Figured it would be better to just focus on the laughter, especially if I could get a giggle out of my brothers.” 

Anj opened her mouth to reply, but just then, Nita skidded to a halt in front of them, almost tripping Anj with her abrupt appearance. She held a lily out, its petals starting off white and changing to a green at the tips that resembled Anj’s tendrils. The stalk was yellowed and hard, and Chuckles wondered how anything that beautiful had managed to flourish in the dry plains of Lothal. 

“It’s kind of like you,” Nita noted. 

Very like her, Chuckles thought.

Anj crouched down next to her. “Oh, that’s far too pretty and delicate to be like me,” she joked softly. 

“You’re pretty too though. Just in a different way,” Nita countered. Standing on her tiptoes, she tucked the bloom’s stem into Anj’s tendrils such that the flower rested against her face. Something shifted in the Nautolan’s expression, and Chuck couldn’t be certain, but it seemed her dark eyes glistened more for a moment. 

“That’s a nice thing to say,” she said quietly. In a second, the emotion was gone, and one of Anj’s trademarks grins slid into place. “What say you and I race your dad the last little bit?” she asked. 

Nita returned her grin. “Let’s do it!”

“Right then.” Anj scooped the tiny Pantoran up, placing her on her shoulders. Chuckles was relieved that Nita didn’t need to be told to not hold onto Anj’s tendrils, instead resting her palms against her skull. “Last one there’s a tooka’s uncle!” Anj declared before taking off at a surprising pace. 

Chuck smiled to himself, jogging after them. 

Being a dad. Being settled. That all sounds nice.

—

The next few hours went by in the blink of an eye. Nita took her role of Head of Decorations very seriously, directing the small group of parents and children that had shown up without hesitation. She’d apparently decided Anj would be her second in command, and the Nautolan embraced the role without question, flawlessly carrying out Nita’s directives and ensuring her instructions were followed to a tee. They hung the paper chains and flowers in the classroom along with the lights and glass decorations. Endi had flung the back doors of the schoolhouse open, revealing the small yard that the children played in during their breaks, and the glass pieces made the sunlight dance across the walls of the small room in rainbows and refracted patterns. A table had been set up outside with the cupcakes Endi had baked and other snacks Chuckles assumed had been brought by some of the other families. His heart clenched at the thought. 

Settled.

There was a small rock garden at one end of the schoolyard, and Nita and her cohorts were planting paper flowers in the dust to give the illusion of an actual garden. Anj followed behind the tiny Pantoran with her massive arms full of the crafted blooms, the real one still tucked behind her ear. She dropped the flowers where Nita directed, and the other children scampered behind, pushing wire stems into the dirt. It didn’t take long for the garden to fully take shape, filled with such a variety of colors, Chuckles wasn’t sure Arni’s pencils could have captured them all. As Chuckles leaned against the doorway, watching the Nita and Anj performing their final inspections, he felt a soft hand rest on his shoulder. 

“She could lead an army,” Endi giggled quietly, her breath warm against Chuckles’s ear. 

“Oh, easily,” he agreed, leaning closer to whisper to her. The scent of her perfume inundated his senses, and his head swam slightly from how close she was standing to him. “She’d have given my captain a run for his credits. That is, if he didn’t willingly enlist under her.” He smiled to himself at the thought of Crater. 

He’d have loved her. 

Endi seemed to sense his wistfulness, gently slipping her hand around his bicep. “Come with me,” she said quietly. 

Chuckles allowed her to lead him back through the classroom and through the narrow doorway he knew led to her apartment. He ignored the heat rising in his cheeks as he crossed the threshold into her personal space. 

The dwelling was humble, but everywhere he looked, he saw traces of Endi. She’d done a wonderful job of making it hers, from the blue paint on the doors to the cream colored curtains that hung over the windows, fluttering in the morning breeze. He tried to take his boots off, afraid of tracking dust off, but she waved him off. 

“I’ve been going back and forth all day, so I’ll have to sweep anyway. Don’t worry about it.” 

The entrance of her apartment consisted of a narrow hall with a closet on one side and a wall on the other that had been covered with student art projects. Chuckles examined some of them as he passed before stepping into the kitchen. It was small, containing a refrigeration unit, a warmer, an oven, and a little bit of counter space. A small herb garden hung under the window, and a table and two chairs were pressed against one wall. The smell of chocolate still lingered in the air, along with the vanilla and spice scent Chuckles had come to associate with Endi. Down the hall, he noted a back door he assumed led out to behind the schoolyard, and another door that was closed. 

Her bedroom.

“I hope I wrapped these alright.” Endi’s voice drew Chuckles from his observations. He faced her, noting that she was gesturing at a small stack of presents on the kitchen table. It wasn’t hard to recognize the shape of the pencil and charcoal boxes he’d gotten the day before. Endi had wrapped them in plain brown paper, but the ribbons on it were a rainbow of colors, tied in delicate, intricate knots that made them really shine. Chuck’s throat tightened as he ran his finger along the curl of one of the bows. 

“They’re perfect. Much better than anything I could have done,” he said quietly, giving her a smile. 

She gave him a pleased grin, clapping her hands together. “I’m so glad.”

“What are the other boxes?”

“Anj and Helly both asked me to wrap theirs too. Said I could do a much better job. Helly got Arni some specimen collecting jars, and Anj got them another sketchbook, figuring they’d tear through more drawings with their new supplies.” Her fingers rested on another package. “I gave them a stone I found when I first moved here.” She giggled softly. “I hope they don’t mind me giving them a rock, but Arni’s got such a scientific mind, I assume they’ll know exactly what it is and if it’s a common specimen. I hope I didn’t give them the equivalent of dirt.” Her eyes met his. “It was sitting on the steps of the schoolhouse when I found it, glinting in the sun, but it felt like a sign I’d found my place. I hope you one day feel like this place is yours as well.” 

Chuckles’s mouth had gone completely dry, and his brain had forgotten every word he’d ever learned. Endi’s cheeks flushed that beautiful shade of purple that had been haunting his dreams. He grasped for the right thing to say and came up empty, floundering frantically in his mind. Endi’s mouth quirked up slightly at the corners, the flush in her cheeks deepening. 

“Endi, I-”

“THEY’RE COMING!!!” Nita burst through the door of the apartment, sweating and panting, but grinning triumphantly. Anj was close behind her. She grinned when she saw the two of them standing together. 

“Helly just sent me a comm. They’re heading over now. Probably got about five minutes.”

“Right, better get these out on the table then,” Endi said, handing Chuckles a few packages before gathering the rest in her arms and stepping out past Anj with Nita close on her heels. He couldn’t be certain, but he was fairly sure her voice was a little more strained and breathy than it had been a moment before. When he went to follow after her, Anj was still grinning, nudging him into the wall with her elbow as he passed. 

“What was that for?”

“Don’t know what you mean,” she teased, giving him a wink. 

Chuckles opened his mouth to protest further, but decided it was only fair that Anj know this about him since she’d entrusted him with her secret about Helly. Even if he wasn’t ready to take the next step with Endi, whatever that was.

Anj’s estimate was damn near spot on. They’d all just managed to get hidden when Helly’s excited voice began carrying into the room through the open door. Chuckles found himself squatting behind a row of desks with Endi and Anj. As Endi crouched down, she lost her balance and fell against him slightly. Instinctively, he wrapped his arm around her waist, holding her up. 

“Thank you,” she whispered. He was certain she was leaning into his touch slightly. 

“Of course,” he replied, glad they’d shut off the lights. His face felt as though it was on fire.

Anj snickered next to him. 

“I NEED TO STOP IN AND SEE TEACHER ENDI ABOUT SOMETHING REALLY QUICKLY. SHOULD ONLY TAKE A MINUTE,” Helly practically shouted. Chuckles heard Anj sigh in exasperation next to him, and he bumped her with his hip. She flicked him back in the forearm. 

Helly’s boots thudded against the steps, absolutely louder than normal, and a second later, she ushered Arni through the door. They looked around, their brows pinched in confusion. 

“Why are the lights-”

“SURPRISE!” 

Arni jolted with surprise as Endi threw the lights on and everyone erupted from their hiding places. Nita practically launched herself at the Twi’lek, and Arni just managed to stay on their feet as they caught her. Their eyes found Chuckles, and he felt as though his heart might burst out of his chest as he stepped forward to give them a hug. 

“How did you know?” Arni’s voice was muffled from where their face was buried in his chest. He rested a hand on top of their head. 

“A little bird named Nita told me,” he said quietly. “Why didn’t you?”

“You were busy,” they mumbled, still holding onto his waist. “Didn’t want to bother you.” 

Chuckles crouched down, resting his hands on their shoulders. “Arni, you are never a bother. Ever.” He noticed their cheeks were wet, and he cupped their face, brushing at the tears there. “You ok, kid? Is this alright?” 

They nodded hurriedly, assuaging his worries. “I’ve just never… I never really had a family to celebrate with. Had a few friends at… before. But it was always small.” Their eyes roved over the decorations and the presents and the table of cupcakes outside. “This is so much.”

“All for you, kid,” Chuck said, smiling. He wrapped his hand around the back of their head, pulling their foreheads together to touch. “You deserve all of this and more. Now, go have fun with your friends.” 

They giggled loudly, the deep laughter that came from their belly and broke into a guffaw. Chuckles had only heard them laugh like that a handful of times since they’d wound up together, and it warmed him from the inside out as Arni grabbed Nita’s hand and raced outside with the rest of the children. 

They get to be a kid now. Just as they should be.

“That was PERFECT!” Helly exclaimed, bounding up to him. “I was nervous they were starting to suspect something after the first hour, but then they started asking SO many questions, and it was just wonderful, and…” The Rodian’s chattering faded into the background as Chuckles’s eyes found Endi’s across the room. She was standing near the back wall, watching the scene quietly with a gentle smile gracing her features. 

Thank you, he mouthed at her. 

She dipped her head in acknowledgement.

Chuckles made his way around the room, thanking each of the parents that had volunteered their time or brought something to contribute. He couldn’t help sneaking peeks out at Arni and the kids, watching them run around the school yard together, most of them with chocolate frosting smeared across their faces in at least one place. 

Settled. Maybe. Just maybe. 

—

And so it went. 

The weeks stretched into a month. The weather began to shift, bringing with it cooler nights and shorter days. Chuckles had always liked milder seasons, preferring them to extreme heat or biting cold, and Lothal’s autumn promised to be just mild enough for his liking, the wind driving him to wear a jacket, but not stinging his cheeks as he walked to work in the mornings. 

With Grinz’s help, Chuckles was able to order clothes for Arni, Nita, and himself that were better suited for the cooler temperatures. They’d needed some alterations, and for that, he’d turned to Endi. Neither of them ever seemed to run out of things for the other to fix, Chuckles trading repairs for Endi’s craftsmanship or baking. While it was obvious to anyone with eyes or the biological equivalent what was happening between the two of them, they still hadn’t moved beyond lingering touches and shared glances that lasted just a half beat too long. 

“Hold still, or I’ll make a pin cushion out of you,” Endi tutted as she made adjustments to the hem of Chuck’s shirt, pulling a pin from between her teeth to hold the fabric in place. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled for what felt like the hundredth time. Standing still for long durations had never been a thing he was good at, and Endi’s fingers somehow continuing to find ways to brush against the skin of his back and stomach did little to make it easier. They’d opted to do the adjustments in the classroom since it had more room and a bit more lighting, and while it had only been about twenty minutes, it felt like Endi had scolded Chuckles plenty for squirming. It was never unkind though, only teasing. Now, an easy silence fell between them as Endi made the final adjustments before straightening and admiring her handiwork. 

“I think that’ll do. Let me have it back, and I should be able to get it finished by the end of the week.” She turned her back to him, replacing items into her sewing kit. “That color looks really nice on you, by the way.” 

Chuckles couldn’t stop himself from ducking his head at the compliment. His fingers fumbled with the buttons. Even though she’d turned around, he still wasn’t used to the thought of her standing there while he removed his shirt. He hurriedly pulled his other one back on before reaching over Endi’s shoulder to hand her the teal garment. She took it, meeting his gaze and smiling in the way that made his stomach flutter. 

“When’s a good time for me to come by and take a crack at your heating unit?” he asked. Endi’s heater had broken down at the beginning of the previous spring, and she’d been putting off having it fixed, but they’d agreed that repairing that would be adequate payment for the alterations to the Ayyshus’ new clothes. 

“Are you going to the festival tomorrow night?” she asked. 

Chuckles vaguely remembered Arni and Nita mentioning something about a festival the week prior. “Yeah, I think the kids were planning on going. I wasn’t sure I would, but I can swing by before you head out and see what I need on the unit. If that’s alright.”

She set the shirt down, crossing her arms and leaning back against her desk. “And why wouldn’t you come? The Harvest Festival is so much fun!” 

“Harvest Festival?” he inquired, raising an eyebrow. “This place has never struck me as a farm town. No crops to speak of.” 

Endi shrugged. “Lothal used to have a lot of agriculture, but the planetwide droughts kind of forced everyone to adjust. That doesn’t stop folks from hoping that the rains and greenery might return, and that one day, farming will be feasible again. Even still, it’s a good excuse to dance and get drunk,” she added with a wink. 

Chuckles tipped his head back and laughed at that. “Fair enough. Alright, what time do festivities start?” 

“Fireworks start just after sundown to kick things off, so maybe just a bit before then if you can swing it. Then we can walk over together. If you’d like.”

The invitation was very obviously there. Her eyes darted from his lips to his eyes, and Maker, it would be so easy to just let both of his hands rest on either side of her hips, to lean in and press his lips against hers. But the doubt lingered, the worries that this was a terrible idea, the concern that he was misreading things entirely. So Chuckles didn’t move closer, not yet. 

“I’d like that,” he agreed. 

Endi nodded, something flashing in her eyes that he couldn’t interpret before it disappeared. She sighed. “Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“Yup. Thanks again.”

“Anytime Chuckles.” 

He left, his feet carrying him home as he overanalyzed that moment, tugging on his mohawk nervously as his mind raced. 

Why not? Why wouldn’t you? 

So what if you’re wrong? She wouldn’t make you feel terrible about it. Just apologize and move on.

But what will the kids think?

He almost tripped on the Starlight’s ramp as he finally reached their home. Arni and Nita were already getting out leftovers from the night before, setting the table for and reheating the rice dish. Chuckles smiled. 

This had become a routine of sorts. There had been a few longer nights at the mine recently to meet Imperial quotas, and when he came home late, Arni and Nita had taken it upon themselves to have dinner ready. He’d never even had to ask; they just adjusted, doing what needed to be done. 

One step at a time. Almost settled. 

That wasn’t to say that everything had been smooth sailing. Chuckles had noticed the two younglings starting to bicker more, and after discussing it with Anj and Endi to get their opinions, they decided it might be time to move them out of the shared bunk since it seemed to be the root of the issue. Arni’s limbs were growing at a rate that Chuckles felt would rival his brothers in their growth tanks, and that seemed to lead to frequent disagreements about whose elbows and knees were allowed to go where. It wasn’t unusual for the two younglings to tumble out of the bunk in the mornings, already grumbling at one another in voices that would crescendo to a shouting match if Chuckles didn’t intervene. It had started to wear on him enough to where he’d finally snapped at them, and then immediately apologized. Still, it was a point of contention. 

It was Anj that had recommended converting the main cargo hold to a shared bedroom for the two of them, and Chuckles had been slowly working on sprucing it up the last few weeks. It was an easy secret to keep since Nita and Arni had collectively decided the hold was too creepy to play in their first months on Sorgan, and had since avoided it, keeping the door on the other side of the kitchenette that led to it firmly closed. But Chuckles was optimistic that the lights and strings of reflective stars he’d been hanging up after the two kids had gone to bed would chase any lingering fears away. At least he hoped so. Grinz had also found a pair of secondhand bunks through his network and was having them shipped in the following week. Chuckles still wasn’t sure how he’d get the kids out of the way to install those, but he was confident he could get Helly and Anj to help. Helly had managed to find some unique decorations to hang on the walls, some even coming from her personal collection, and in Chuck’s mind, the hold had started to have a more welcoming feel. The decorations on the walls made it feel less cold and sterile, and the strings of lights cast a warm light around the place, chasing any lingering shadows out of sight. 

Bedtime was a bit of a struggle that evening, with Nita accusing Arni of laying on top of her trooper doll and Arni grumbling that she left it everywhere, so it was bound to get laid on at some point. Chuckles managed to get them to at least come to a truce before they dozed off, collapsing into his own bunk and drifting off to sleep thinking of golden eyes, dark curls, and fingertips grazing his spine. 

Despite the disagreement the night before, the following morning, every hint of the previous night’s animosity had vanished, completely eclipsed by their excitement for the festival. Chuck wasn’t sure how Arni and Nita would manage to wait all day, and finally chased them outside to burn off some of their excess energy. 

After the kids left, he went through his morning routine on his days off, making himself a cup of caf and a quick breakfast as he scanned the newsfeeds. He’d periodically checked things on Sorgan, but at that point, had been almost afraid of what he’d read. Now, he found himself scanning for the names of his brothers or any mention of Force users, but he always seemed to come up empty. It didn’t stop him from hoping. Hope wasn’t something he’d had a lot of during the war, but here on Lothal, he’d felt it wedging itself in the crevices in his heart, taking root and blossoming. He hoped that they’d stay here. He hoped the kids would continue to find their place and be happy. He hoped he’d one day feel safe enough to relax. 

He almost could forget about the Empire and the Jedi at times, forget about the war and the fact that the three of them were all technically fugitives. That frightened him. Crater had always warned the 28th Wing that becoming complacent was when they were the least safe, so Chuckles did his best to remain vigilant. Still, as he sat there listening to Nita and Arni giggle and shout, for a moment, it was easy to pretend that everything was normal as he set the datapad aside and finished his caf. 

He found himself more focused on what to wear tonight, silly as it was. Whatever shirt he’d wear would likely get covered in oil and grease depending on how extensive the repair to Endi’s heating unit was, but her words echoed in his mind as he poked through his meager wardrobe. 

“That color looks really nice on you, by the way.” 

He selected one of the older shirts he had, one he’d traded for their first month on Sorgan. It was more sunbleached and worn, but it was comfortable and close to the color of the shirt Endi was altering for him. He hadn’t worn it in quite a while, and as he pulled it over his head, he caught a glimpse of himself in the ‘fresher mirror. 

His body had absolutely changed in the last month. The muscles that he’d allowed to grow softer on Sorgan were now more defined than they’d been in a long while, maybe since his training days. His shoulders and back in particular had hardened from the work in the mine, and he had a few new scars he’d garnered from bumping up against the rocky walls or having to crawl through a few narrow spaces. The soreness he’d experienced in the first week had long faded, leaving him feeling stronger than he’d been in a while and seemingly dissipating some of the pains that had lingered after his crash. The shirt felt looser as he pulled it on, rolling the sleeves to his forearms out of habit. The fabric hung in places where it had previously fit a little tighter, and now it fit his back and shoulders better. 

Chuckles examined his reflection further, leaning forward to run his fingers through his faded blue mohawk, and eyeing the dark roots that were beginning to show. 

Might be time to re-dye it. Maybe change the color. I’ll let the kids decide. 

It was trivial, he knew, but he was sad at the thought of covering the color Oksann had so carefully crafted with the kids. It felt like one of the last remnants of their time on Sorgan, one of the last things they’d done with Ry and Oks before they’d uprooted and run. He sighed. 

Our life is here now. And that’s good.

Ry would tell me I’m being an idiot anyway. 

He met his own brown eyes in the mirror, the ones he shared with his brothers. It almost felt as if the next thought came from Crater or Howzer or Two-Pint or any of the ones he was closest with that had offered him advice when it was needed. 

You’ll never be settled if you keep looking back.

—

“Yeah, you just need a new power coupler and heating core. Both pretty standard parts, I think. I’ll talk with Grinz tomorrow and see if he’s able to pull some strings and get them here before it gets too cold,” Chuck informed Endi, wiping the grease off his palms. He’d just crawled out from under the heating unit just outside the apartment’s back door, dusting himself off before Endi handed him a rag to clean off his hands. She stood in the doorway, leaning against it with one shoulder, smiling in that way that made Chuck’s heart flutter. 

“What do you think the parts will cost me?” she asked. 

He shrugged. “Not sure. When I was a soldier, everything was funded by the Republic, so cost really wasn’t an issue. I’ll see if I can barter a favor for Grinz if it’s too bad.” 

“You don’t have to do that, Chuckles.”

“I know, but I will anyway.” He gave her a grin, and he wasn’t certain, but it seemed she flushed a bit. 

“Well, come on in and get yourself cleaned up then. Can’t have you going to the festival with that grease smear on your chin.” 

Chuckles ducked his head, rubbing the back of his neck to hide the heat in his face. Stepping back inside, he squeezed past Endi in the hall, making the way to her kitchen and running the water in her sink to better clean his hands. Glancing out the window, he noted the sun was almost fully below the horizon. 

Better hurry if we’re going to make the fireworks. 

“Here.” Endi appeared at his side, handing him a glass of ice water. He took it and drank greedily, some of the water sliding past the corner of his mouth and running down his chin and throat. When he finished, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, swiping at the trails of water that dipped below his shirt. He noted the way Endi’s eyes followed his fingers, her pupils seeming to widen slightly when he nudged the collar of his shirt aside to dab at the dribbles. 

“Sorry I’m such a sweaty, dusty mess,” he mumbled sheepishly. “I meant to try and keep myself clean, but I wanted to do that repair right. Or as right as I could right now.” He tugged nervously at his mohawk, trying not to think about how sweaty the roots felt. 

“And I appreciate that,” she replied, taking the empty glass back from him and setting it on her counter. Taking a dish towel from the edge of the sink, she dabbed at his chin. “There, now you’re a little more presentable.” Her eyes flicked to where his fingers were still woven into his hair. 

“That’s your nervous tell, isn’t it? When you tug like that?”

Chuck’s face felt as though it was on fire. “I suppose. I’ve always done it ever since I started wearing it like this, even before I started dyeing it.” 

Endi smiled. “Looks like you’re due for a touch-up soon. Grinz can get you about any color you want. Do you think you’ll change things up?”

Chuckles shrugged. “Not sure. I let the kids pick last time, and I’m a bit partial to it, but we’ll see.” 

Endi set the towel on the counter, stepping closer to Chuckles. He could smell her perfume again, although at this point, he wasn’t sure if it was perfume or just her. It was intoxicating, and he swallowed hard as she reached up to run her fingers through his fading mohawk. “I like the blue,” she said softly. “You should keep it.” Her fingers trailed through his hair, and he sucked in a sharp breath at her nearness. She’d touched him before of course, but it had always been innocent, either a hand resting on his arm or accidentally grazing his skin. This felt intentional, like a test to see how he’d respond. Endi’s eyes met his, gauging his reaction, her golden irises hopeful but hesitant. 

Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.

When he didn’t move, she allowed her fingertips to graze his cheek, tracing the scar at the corner of his mouth before her palm rested against the side of his face. He leaned into it, feeling her warmth against his skin. Her breath stuttered. The two of them stared at each other, clearly waiting to see what the other would do now that lines had been deliberately crossed. The only sounds Chuckles could hear was Endi’s breathing and his own blood pounding in his ears. He was frozen, unsure of what to do until she began to withdraw her hand.

He didn’t want her to stop touching him. 

He wanted her. 

Settled. You could be settled. Maybe with her.

Endi gave him a sheepish grin, opening her mouth to offer an apology, but she didn’t get a single word out. Chuckles crashed his lips against hers just as the festival’s first firework exploded outside the kitchen window.

A/N: Two-Pint is the fantastic @teletraan-meets-jarvis's creation and is introduced in her story "Pieces". If you love compelling Jedi and clone OCs, the Wolfpack, and general shenanigans combined with a delicious slow burn, then I highly recommend you check it out!

Tag List: @seriowan @partoftheeternalsoul @rosmariner @misogirl828 @ellichonkasaurusrex @zoeykallus @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @staycalmandhugaclone @redheadgirl @fordo-kixed-rex @wizardofrozz @ariadnes-red-thread @justanothersadperson93 @leftealeaf @kaminocasey @echos-girlfriend @lucyysthings @obihiddlenox @merkitty49 @littlemissmanga @clonecyaree @baba-fett @sleepingsun501 @rexxdjarin @samspenandsword @babygirlrex0504 @ladytano420 @fxlsealarm @runforrestr @djarrex @corrieguards @the-cantina @witchklng @wolffegirlsunite @fives-lover @rain-on-kamino @ladykatakuri @arctrooper69 @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall

#karrde writes #one step at a time #osaat #OC Chuckles #OC Arni #OC Nita #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Nita Ayyshu #clone oc #jedi oc #more ocs than I know what to do with #i can't stop making more of them #found family #angst #fluff #so much fluff #domestic fluff #slow burn

[wild-karrde]

One Step at a Time - Part 10

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: Another chapter??? YES. YES INDEED. There's a reason I'm focusing on this fic right now, and I think it will all come together swimmingly (I apologize for being vague, but I PROMISE THERE'S A REASON). As always, thank you to the stupendous @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta-reading this chapter for me and screaming with me about this story!!!

Chapter Rating: T

Warnings: language, implied sexual content

Word Count: 6.5k words

“Pssssssst.” 

Chuckles was jolted awake by a persistent tugging on the sleeve of his shirt. Sitting bolt upright on his bunk, he whipped his head around to find Nita staring at him with wide eyes. 

“Nita, honey wh-” A pudgy hand slapped over his mouth, and the tiny Pantoran held a finger to her lips, glaring at him as though he’d walked into some holy place and started obnoxiously shouting. 

“Shhhh!” she warned. “You’ll wake Arni!”

Chuck’s eyes flicked to the bunk, where he could still hear Arni snoring uninterrupted. 

A thermal detonator wouldn’t wake that kid.

“And why don’t we want to do that?” he mumbled around Nita’s fingers. 

“It’s a secret, so you gotta stay quiet.” 

“Ok,” he whispered. “What’s the secret?” 

Nita stood on her tiptoes, and Chuckles leant down, propping himself up on one elbow so she could cup her hand to his ear, whispering loudly. “Tomorrow is Arni’s birthday.” 

Chuckles’s heart fell and then began to race. 

You don’t even know when their birthdays are. What a kriffing idiot you are. You never even asked. 

“How do you know that?” he asked cautiously, trying not to allow the guilt seeping through him to show. 

Nita rocked back on her heels nervously. “We… we were kind of arguing last night. They told me I was only five and didn’t know everything, and I told them they were only ten and couldn’t know that much more than me. And they told me they wouldn’t be ten for much longer. Then they told me it’s tomorrow.” She bounced on the balls of her feet, some of her apprehension seeming to fade at the prospect of planning a surprise. “Do you think we should do something for them?” 

Chuckles rolled onto his back, scrubbing his hands over his face as his mind fumbled with all of the information that had been dumped on him while he was still only fractionally conscious. 

Arni’s birthday is tomorrow. They’re turning eleven. Maker. At least Nita’s not holding a grudge about whatever they were bickering about. They seem to be doing that a bit more often lately. 

He turned to look at Nita. “Why didn’t they say something sooner?”

She shrugged. “They didn’t want you to make a big deal out of it since you’ve been so tired from your job.” 

Chuckles couldn’t deny that was true. He’d survived his first week in the mine, but he hadn’t experienced this much muscle soreness since his days as a cadet. He’d admittedly worked extra hard this week to impress Anj and the crew, always taking on any additional work and lending a hand where he could. He felt he’d impressed her, but most nights, he’d barely managed to limp home, collect the kids from school, muddle through an easy dinner, and often collapse into his bunk before either of the younglings were in bed, unable to keep his eyes open a second longer. He’d tried to stay in the pilot’s seat to sleep, but after the first night, tossing and turning and adjusting to try and give his sore muscles some relief, he’d wound up with a crick in his neck and a poor attitude he couldn’t shake, so he’d surrendered to the pull-down bunk. And he’d slept marginally better, even if he’d still woken up sore. 

Now, his heart clenched at the thought of Arni keeping their birthday to themself in order to spare him more work. 

The kid is more observant than anyone could ever guess. And too anxious about bothering other people. And considerate to a fault. 

They’d picked up the slack this week without him having to ask. Every morning, he’d awoken to the previous night’s dinner packed away in the refrigeration unit with the dishes they’d used washed, dried, and put away by Arni. Every morning, the young Twi’lek had Nita ready to go before Chuckles even thought to ask, her hair tied up in buns with silver ribbons, and Arni always assured him that any take-home work from school had been completed. Chuckles had planned on doing something special for them once he got his feet more underneath him. 

But a birthday could not wait. 

Luckily, he had today and tomorrow off, and while he’d planned to sleep in and indulge in an extra-long hot shower to relax, he knew now his day would be a busy one. He started making a mental checklist of everything he’d need to do. 

Head to the store and see what Grinz has in stock that could be used for a party. 

If there’s no cake at the shop, figure out how to make a cake. 

Decorations? What kind of decorations? Maybe Nita can be in charge of that. She should be in charge of something. 

Who can we invite? The kid probably has friends. 

I should call…

His thoughts trailed off as heat rushed to his face at the thought of Endi. With as busy as he’d been this week, there hadn’t been a spare second to think of anything else, especially not comming the kids’ very attractive teacher. 

How long is too long to wait to comm someone? Have I completely kriffed this up before it even started? 

Whatever it is.

Chuckles pulled the piece of flimsi from where he’d tucked it next to his bunk, running his thumbs over the creases and worn edges. A pang of guilt settled into his stomach as his thoughts drifted to the other woman with dark hair that Endi had made him think of. It had only been a handful of months, but she seemed like a lifetime ago, like a dream he almost couldn’t remember.  

She’d want you to be happy. 

I think.

It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought of her. Hell, he’d been on his way to see her when everything went to shit. And it’s not like he hadn’t thought of trying to reach out to her. 

Who says she even wants to hear from me? Especially after everything that happened? 

Does she think I killed younglings? That I became one of them? Or does she just assume I’m dead? 

He sighed, scrubbing his hands over his face. 

I’m so sorry, Bolts. 

They hadn’t dated, at least not the way he’d wanted to, not the way she deserved. That was supposed to come after the war, when he wasn’t a soldier and she wasn’t a mechanic that worked on his fighter. He was going to take her to dinner, to court her like a normal guy would get to, without her having to worry that people would think she was favoring him over his brothers or their Jedi generals. She had even talked about opening up her own shop after the war in the evenings when they were still tangled up in one another in her bed. 

“I think it’d be nice to work on different speeders and crafts. It’s been nothing but gunships and fighters for the last three years. I can damn near guess what’s broken at this point without even looking at something,” she’d joked one night. 

“Oh yeah?” he’d retorted. “And what do you think is broken on my fighter this time?”

She’d rolled over, propping herself up on one elbow, her fingers trailing along his chest before she poked him in the sternum accusingly. 

“Your engine stabs are fucked.” 

“How could you possibly know it’s my stabilizers?” 

“Because you fly like an asshole, and I’ve had to replace them every few months. You’re due for a burnout.”

He’d scoffed in mock hurt before leaning in to kiss her. She’d giggled against his lips as she rolled him under her and straddled his hips. 

“I’m right aren’t I?” she asked, tongue poking between her teeth teasingly. 

He’d huffed, struggling to focus as she’d ground against him slightly. “Of course you are.” 

She’d cackled triumphantly before making him late to his first briefing of the morning. 

Now, the memory of her itched at the back of his mind as he rubbed the flimsi between his fingers again. His lips unconsciously traced the outline of her name, rolling the familiar syllables over his tongue silently. 

Brienna. 

“What?” 

He noticed Nita was still watching him, her brows furrowing in curiosity as she glanced back and forth from him to the scrap in his hand. He tucked it in his palm to hide it from view. 

“Nothing, just thinking.” He plowed forward without waiting to see if Nita bought it. “Alright kid, if we’re going to pull this off, you’re going to have to be my co-conspirator. Do you know what that means?”

Her smile didn’t falter. “No.”

“It means you’re my partner. My co-pilot for this mission.” 

She inhaled in excitement. “Are we going flying?”

“No.”

Her face fell this time. Chuckles’s mind scrambled to recover from its dead spin. 

“But what it does mean is that you have to be sneaky. We have to make sure it’s a surprise. Got it?” 

The promise of secrecy seemed to sweep away the little Pantoran’s disappointment. She danced gleefully in front of him. 

“Ok! What can I do?”

He leaned closer, glancing left and right as if there might be eavesdroppers. Nita’s face grew more serious, and she stepped closer as he leaned down conspiratorially. He cupped his hands around her ear. 

“I need you to keep Arni busy today and tomorrow maybe. Keep them out of the ship. Go exploring with them or something. Look for things to draw. But keep them occupied,” he whispered. “Think you can manage that?”

Nita was bouncing excitedly, but once again grew serious under the weight of this important task. 

“I can do it. I won’t let you down!” 

Chuckles extended his pinky, which she locked her pinky with. 

“I’m counting on you, soldier,” he said with all the authority he could muster while keeping a straight face. 

Nita drew herself up to attention, saluting him clumsily. “You can count on me!”

Chuckles had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from laughing. “Good. Now go wake up your sibling and get them out of here. Remember, you’ve got to be sneaky!” 

Nita didn’t waste another millisecond, bounding over to the bunk and practically tackling the snoozing Twi’lek. 

“ARNI! Wake up!” 

Chuckles couldn’t hear exactly what their response was, but their grumbling tone easily conveyed how little they appreciated being woken up in this manner. 

They’ll forgive her tomorrow. And hopefully me. 

Chuckles rolled onto his back, pulling his datapad up to start jotting down his to-do list for the day. To Nita’s credit, it only took her a few minutes to drag a reluctant Arni out of their bunk. The sleepy Twi’lek nodded at Chuckles as they shoved their sketchbook and pencils into a small satchel. 

“Where are you kids off to?”

“I SAW A TOOKA AND WANT ARNI TO COME HELP ME FIND IT!”

“We’re never gonna catch it, Nita. We never even get close.” 

“Well, maybe we will this time!”

Arni mumbled something unintelligible. 

“And I think it had babies with it!” Nita tried again, attempting to sweeten the pot. 

“Babies? Loth cats typically don’t bring their young out when they hunt,” Arni commented, but Chuckles could see they were suddenly more awake at that prospect of making an unusual scientific discovery. “Normally, they leave them in their nests.”

“Well, maybe we can find the nest! I bet that would be really cool! And full of cute babies!” 

Arni pondered for another moment, and Chuckles found himself holding his breath. 

“We’ll have to be careful because Loth cat mamas can be very protective of their kits,” they said, absently rubbing the birthmark on their cheek. “But it would be cool to draw a family.” 

“Let’s GO then!” Nita insisted. “Before we lose her!” 

“Ok, ok I’m coming! Just let me get my boots on. Go grab some protein bars and water for snacks!” 

“Those aren’t snacks.”

“Then get some real snacks too!” Arni replied excitedly. “But hurry!” They already had one boot on, and they were frantically lacing up their other one, hopping around on one foot. “What are you gonna do?” they asked, glancing over at Chuckles. 

“Oh, I don’t know,” Chuckles said as casually as he could. “Might sleep a little more and then head to the store for more supplies. Jerrno paid me early, so I can get us more food.” It was the first time he’d ever actually been paid for working in credits. He’d never had a problem working for Ry and getting paid in food and the occasional traded good. It had ensured the credits Chirrut and Baze had sent with them could be used for larger items and saved for emergencies, but there was something about earning the money that sent pride coursing through Chuckles. It felt silly, but it also felt good, and he’d take good. 

“We’re out of Spice Snappers. Could you get more of those if it’s not too much trouble?” Arni asked hesitantly. 

Anything for you, kiddo. 

“I’ll see what Grinz has at the store,” Chuckles promised. He hadn’t yet become acquainted with the shopkeeper, but from everything he’d heard at work, he was a kindly Ugnaut that was slightly hard of hearing, but made up for it with his terrible jokes and excellent sense of humor. 

Arni nodded, apparently satisfied with his promise to try. Nita returned a few moments later, her arms full of snacks, which Arni had to negotiate down to one pack that was small enough to fit in their satchel. Nita had clearly been disappointed, but when Chuckles met her eyes and winked at her, her dedication to their secret mission seemed to renew, and the frown quickly disappeared from her face. The two younglings raced down the lamp, shouting goodbyes over their shoulders as the hatch closed behind them. Chuckles laid back, allowing a few minutes to pass before he decided they definitely weren’t returning for any reason. He slipped the scrap of flimsi back out, staring at Endi’s delicate and neat writing.

You’re overthinking this. For all you know, she’s just being nice and welcoming. Maybe she really does just want to help mend Nita’s leggings. Don’t read too much into it. 

He punched in the frequency, listening to the crackle of static quietly fade to a dull beeping. The comm was quiet for what seemed like an eternity, and he was about to give up when a sleepy voice answered on the other end. 

“Hello?”

Oh karking hells. I woke her up. 

The sudden urge to sit up overtook him, and he swung his legs over the side of the bunk, resting his bare feet against the cool metal of the floor. His unoccupied hand wove into his hair, tugging nervously at the tips of his mohawk. He briefly considered cutting the link, but if he did that and called later, then she’d absolutely recognize the incoming frequency and know he was the one that had woken her up anyway. So if he did that, there’s no way he could ever comm her again. Unless he got another commlink…

“Is someone there?” 

He bumped the heel of his hand against his forehead. 

“Yeah, hey Teacher Endi, it’s me. Sorry, it’s Chuck. Chuckles.  I… I’m sorry, is this a bad time? I can call later.”

There was a soft laugh on the other end of the link. It made the tension in his shoulders release slightly. “No, it’s fine. I’m just getting out of bed to make my morning tea. Also, you can just call me Endi if you like.” 

The image of Endi getting out of bed invaded Chuckles’s mind. He imagined her in a practical nightgown, maybe something with a simple lace on the hem, her dark curls hanging loosely in her eyes and over her shoulders as she pulled on a delicate robe and made her way towards her kitchen. It probably smelled of cinnamon and herbs, and he imagined there was a window that allowed sunlight to trickle in, illuminating her light blue skin in a soft glow and making her golden eyes sparkle even more.

Her eyes are really beautiful.

“Umm… Chuckles?”

Kriff. Focus.

“Yeah. Sorry. Been a bit of a week.”

“Anj never goes easy on anyone, especially newcomers.”

He huffed a laugh of agreement, wiggling his toes against the floor of the ship and rubbing the back of his neck. “Listen, I know it’s probably poor manners to ask for a favor when you first call someone, but I’m in a bit of a bind, and I think you might be just the person to help me out of it.” 

He could hear water filling a kettle on the other end with Endi humming quietly in the background. 

“Well, technically you don’t have to ask since I offered to mend the leggings,” she teased. 

“Yeah. No, I’m still likely going to take you up on that. But… there’s something else.” Chuckles sighed in frustration, scrubbing his hand over his face. “I know… I know this is going to make me sound like a horrible father, but Arni’s birthday is tomorrow, and I didn’t know. And now I do, and I want to pull something together. I know it’s last minute, but they do so much, and I feel like a karking idiot for not knowing my own kid’s birthday, but clones don’t really celebrate birthdays, so it’s not exactly something I’m used to doing and-”

“Chuckles… CHUCKLES!” She finally managed to interrupt him, and he fell silent. She giggled softly again. “Listen, you told me about how short of a time you’ve been together, so I know you’re all still figuring things out. You caught it before it happened, so there’s still time to fix it. And you’ve been a bit busy trying to keep them fed. So maybe give yourself a bit of a break?” 

He huffed another quiet laugh. “I just… I barely know where to start. I don’t even know what to get them. They never ask for anything.”

“I might have a few ideas,” Endi offered. 

He grinned. “I’m all ears.” 

—

Chuckles was glad he’d used the ship’s ‘fresher before heading into town, especially when he stepped into Grinz’s shop and a loud alarm started blaring with flashing lights. Otherwise, he would have had to procure a new pair of trousers as well.

“KARKING HELLS!” he shouted, his hands flying to cover his ears. His eyes darted around for any way to shut the alarm off. There were rows and rows of goods, but in his urgency, he couldn’t find anything that looked like an “off” button. When his eyes finally fell on the counter, he jogged over and practically launched himself up on the surface, pushing himself forward until his lower stomach and hips were pressed into the countertop as he hung over the other side upside down, scanning for the button that would stop the cacophony. His fingers felt along the inner edge of the underside of the counter, trying to find anything. 

Come on, there’s gotta be a switch here or something.

“WUDDER YOU DOIN’?!” came a startled exclamation from his left. Chuckles whipped his head around only to find himself nose to nose with what appeared to be the business end of a dried sausage. Holding the sausage was a glaring Ugnaut with bushy eyebrows. He apparently hadn’t thought to grab for the blaster at his hip, a thing Chuckles was immediately grateful for. 

“WHOA! HOLD IT!” he shouted, raising his hands over his head in surrender. Due to his upside down position, his fingertips brushed the floor. “YOU WANNA TURN OFF THE ALARM?”

“WHAT?” shouted the Ugnaut. 

“I SAID DO YOU WANT TO TURN OFF THE ALARM?” 

The Ugnaut shook his head. “HANG ON, LET ME TURN OFF THE ALARM.” 

Chuckles sighed as the Ugnaut stepped back towards the entrance to what appeared to be a storage room, tapping a discolored tile on the wall. Immediately, the room fell silent and the lights ceased strobing. Chuckles pushed himself back over the counter, digging a pinky into his still-ringing ear. The Ugnaut re-emerged from the backroom, still giving Chuckles a suspicious glare as he wielded his sausage weaponry. He waddled over to an overturned crate, hopping up on it and leaning on the counter to survey Chuckles warily. 

“Who are you?” he demanded, waving the sausage threateningly. 

“Chuckles.”

“WHA?”

“CHUCKLES, SIR.” 

“Alright calm down, sonny. No need to shout. I’m not that hard o’ hearin’.” He tittered to himself slightly at that. “Although that is why I’ve got the alarm system. Damn bell was too quiet when someone came in.” 

Chuckles couldn’t suppress his grin any longer. “I take it you’re the owner of this establishment then.” 

“‘Pends who’s askin’.” He raised a bushy eyebrow. “You say your name’s Chuckles?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Can’t recall seein’ you ‘round.”

“Just rolled into town this last week. I’m working at the mine.”

The Ugnaut’s beady eyes lit up. “Ah, you’re Anj’s new guy! She’s been in here talkin’ ‘boutcha. I’ve heard things.”

“Good things, I hope.” 

His eyes narrowed. “Says you’re a clone. That true?” 

Chuckles swallowed hard. “I am. That a problem?”

The Ugnaut leaned on the counter, inspecting Chuckles with a stern gaze that made him rock back on his heels reflexively. After a few moments, he straightened. “Shame, that.”

“What is?”

“That there’re a million of you out there with that face. You’d think they’d have made you just a little less ugly if they were gonna do it a million times,” he barked out between guffaws, holding his rotund belly, which was jiggling with mirth. “Ah, I’m just joshin’ with you, Chuckles. You’re a fine looker.” He held out a stubby hand. “Name’s Grinz, but I assume you knew that from the sign out front.” 

Chuckles decided it was best not to tell his new compatriot that the hand-painted sign he’d haphazardly nailed to the outside of the shop was far from legible. The green painted roof had been the identifying feature Endi had given him to find the place. He clasped the Ugnaut’s hand, giving it a shake of greeting.

“Nice to meet you, Grinz. I’ve heard you’re the man to come to if I’m in need of supplies.” 

“Indeed I am. What can I get you?” 

“I need to restock on some food. Got two kids to feed. And I uh… need some help with planning a birthday party. My oldest kid is turning eleven tomorrow.” 

The Ugnaut’s eyes were sparkling as he clapped his hands together. “A birthday, you say? Well, we can certainly get something for the kid. You got plans? Ideas for gifts?” 

“I’m trying to pull together a quick party with Teacher Endi over at the schoolhouse. She was the one that sent me your way in the first place.” He still couldn’t quite bring himself to drop her formal title completely just yet. It felt improper, and like an admission that something was happening between them. 

Grinz smiled. “That Endi is the best person you could have recruited to help you. She’s great with the kiddos. She always seems to know exactly what to do in a pinch. Not a bad cook either, from what I hear.” Chuckles wasn’t sure if Grinz was gauging him or implying anything, but it did feel like his eyes lingered on him for a beat too long as if he were waiting for a reaction. He nodded, returning the Ugnaut’s grin. 

“Hope so. She volunteered to make some cakes, and I wasn’t about to stop her.” 

“Mmm… she send you with a list?”

“Yes sir.” Chuckles extended out the datapad he had typed Endi’s list on. Grinz abandoned his sausage weaponry and produced a bent pair of spectacles from the breast pocket of his shirt, perching them on his snout. They rocked slightly, and he steadied them with one hand as he held the datapad out in front of him to read. “Alright… flour, sugar, sprinkles, should have all of that. At the bottom says charcoal pencils?” 

“Yeah, she said you had a set in stock and maybe a set of colored pencils? My kid, Arni, they love to sketch wildlife and plants, and they’ve damn near worn down the set of colored pencils and charcoals they do have. She thought maybe you could help me replace them.” 

“Well, she’d know. You work with Helly too, dontcha?”

“I do.” 

“Well, you may want your youngin’ to go talk to her. She’s got quite a collection of specimens. Even does some drawings and submits them for publication every once in a while. She’s pretty darn good if you ask me. Although I’m not the most cultured being ‘round these parts.” He hopped off the stool, waddling along shelves. Chuckles followed, and after a few moments, barely caught the bag of flour that was tossed at him. “Keep up, Chuck. We’re gonna get you out of here quick-like so you can get to bakin’ with Miss Endi.” 

Chuckles huffed a laugh. “Yes, sir.” 

It took Grinz less than ten minutes to find every item on the list along with a few bonus items he insisted Chuckles take for the kids. He even managed to find a bag of Arni’s Spice Snappers, promising to make a note for his next shipment to include more. When he was paying, Chuckles noticed there was no charge for the charcoal or pencils. 

“Grinz, wait. You forgot-”

The Ugnaut held up a hand. “I won’t be takin’ money for these. You tell your kiddo I just want to see some of their work they do with it. That’ll be payment enough.” 

“Grinz, these can’t have been cheap. I’m good for it.”

“I know y’are. Jerrno wouldn’ta hired you if you weren’t. And Anj says you’re good, and she’s hard to impress.” He reached over the counter, clapping Chuckles on the shoulder. “Welcome to the community, friend. Now get goin’. Don’t want to keep Miss Endi waitin’.” 

This time, Chuckles was certain he saw a flicker of mischief in Grinz’s eyes as he handed him the last of his parcels. 

—

Chuckles hustled back to the ship, relieved to find that Nita was still keeping Arni occupied somewhere else. As quickly as he could, he put the supplies away before tossing the ingredients Endi had specified and the birthday gifts into one of the empty bags and dashing off towards the schoolhouse to meet her. 

Bounding up the steps, he hesitated for a moment at the closed door, smoothing his shirt and mohawk nervously. Before he could raise a knuckle to knock, the door burst open, and Chuckles was surprised to find a familiar Rodian staring back at him. 

“Helly?”

“Hiya, Chuck! Come on in!” She stepped back, ushering him inside, and Chuckles was surprised to find the classroom full of people. Anj was sitting in one corner working on a string of lights, and after closing the door, Helly dashed back over to help her. There were also a handful of people he didn’t recognize seated at a table in the back of the classroom, some adults and some children. One little Togruta girl looked up from the paper chain she was working on and waved shyly at him. He waved back.

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised it’s not just me and Endi. This is great. And you’re not disappointed at all. At all. 

“That was quick!” He turned to find Endi gracefully sweeping towards him, and his slight disappointment was forgotten when she smiled at him. She peered into the bag, poking through the items contained within. “Looks like Grinz had everything we need too! Excellent. Here, let me take this.” Before he could protest, she scooped the bag out of his arms and turned to address the room. “Everyone, this is Chuckles. He’s Arni’s father.” 

All eyes turned towards him, and Chuckles wanted to spontaneously combust. He waved timidly again. “I uh… appreciate the help with all of this.” 

Endi patted him on the shoulder. “I explained to them how this is the first birthday Arni is celebrating with you, and that you wanted to ensure it was special, even though you’ve all had quite the first week.” She winked, and he felt heat sweep over his face. His tongue felt like lead as he searched for the right words. 

“Thanks,” was all he came up with. 

“Of course,” she whispered back, gently guiding him towards the people seated around the back table. “These are members of Arni’s class and their families.” They went around and introduced themselves. There was a little human boy named Cen, and his fathers both embraced Chuckles in strong hugs. He learned that the little Togruta girl was Ooni, the child that had been on the receiving end of Dez’s bullying the first day he’d dropped the kids off. Dez was noticeably absent. 

Probably for the best. Kid sounded like a dick. 

It took him a few moments to realize he’d been guided to a seat by Endi, given a task, and she’d disappeared from view. 

“Where’d Endi go?” he asked without thinking. When he noticed a raised eyebrow from one of Cen’s fathers, he quickly added. “I left the gifts for Arni in that bag she has.” 

“She’s probably in her apartment in the back baking,” Ooni’s mother suggested. “I think I saw her head that way.”

“She lives in the schoolhouse?” 

“She says it’s more convenient that way,” Cen’s less discerning father noted. “It’s not a bad little apartment. I installed her power and water system when we were getting her set up. I can take you back if you want.”

“Nah, I can wait,” Chuck replied. Somehow, going into Endi’s living space felt like an invasion of something. He wasn’t ready to plunge into that territory just yet. 

The conversation came easy after a while, Chuck’s shoulders loosening as he helped make banners and paper chains. Anj and Helly got their light strings working and came over to help with the paper decorations. The Nautolan plopped down in the seat next to him, elbowing him in the ribs. He winced. 

“Ah, not that bad then,” she teased. “If you were as sore as you were a few rotations back, that’d have put you in a medcenter.” 

“That’s true, I suppose,” he muttered, rubbing at the sore spot. “So does that mean I pass?”

Anj laughed loudly. “You passed after the third day, my friend. You work hard and you didn’t give up, even when we pressed you a bit. Even Lu agrees, and he’s a tough customer.” Chuckles couldn’t stop the flush of pride that overtook him, tugging the corner of his lips up into a grin. 

“Glad to have passed the test.”

“Welcome to the team!” Helly cheered. 

“By the way, Helly, I hear you’re into science and artwork,” Chuckles said, turning towards the Rodian. 

“I am!” she excitedly confirmed. 

“Then I need another favor…”

—

The day passed quickly, and before Chuckles knew it, Lothal’s sun was sinking low on the horizon, making way for its twin moons. The parents and kids filed out with Anj and Helly lingering to say goodbye before also disappearing into the night. 

The paper chains and decorations they’d crafted were draped across the back table along with the strings of lights that Anj and Helly had detangled and repaired, ready and waiting to be hung the next day. Endi had also found some colored glass decorations, and they twinkled in the light where they sat. The parents and kids had all offered to decorate tonight, but Chuckles had apologetically declined, having promised Nita she could be in charge of the decorations. They all seemed to be understanding, especially the two children that had actually met Nita. Now, Chuckles was sweeping up the last of the paper scraps to be disposed of as Endi emerged from her apartment, carrying a cupcake in each hand. 

“Everyone else head out?” she asked. 

“Yeah, they’re all gone. Figured I shouldn’t leave the place a mess when you’ve gone through all this trouble to help me,” he replied, emptying the last of the scraps into the waste bin. 

“Well, good. That means you can help me with the quality control of these,” she joked, handing one to him. “I thought cupcakes might be easier for sharing, if that’s alright. The ones tomorrow will have frosting and sprinkles, but I wanted them to cool off first.”

Chuckles grinned, taking the cupcake from her. “That’s perfect. Thanks.” 

“I hope Arni likes chocolate.” 

“I think they do. And honestly, they’d never tell you if they didn’t. But I’ve seen them nibble on a chocolate bar every now and again. If Nita doesn’t eat them all first.” 

Endi giggled lightly, perching on the surface of her desk as she took a bite of the cupcake. Chuckles eyed one of the student desks in the front of the room. They were smaller, meant for children. But that wasn’t enough to deter him. Especially if it meant getting another laugh out of Endi. Crouching down, he stuffed his knees under the desk, setting his cupcake on the work surface as he wiggled further into the seat. When he raised his eyes, Endi was watching him with an expression of suppressed mirth, her eyebrow raised in amusement. 

“Comfortable?” 

“Never better,” Chuckles grunted. He now realized this may have been a terrible idea, as many of his comedic plans were. But still, the way she was smiling at him made it all seem worth it. He took a bite out of the cupcake. 

“MMMMM,” he groaned. There were small pockets of chocolate chips inside that melted when they hit his tongue, and the cake surrounding them was so moist and soft. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d tasted something like this. It only took a few more bites for him to finish, leaving behind only a smattering of crumbs as evidence. When he glanced up again, he realized Endi was still watching him, now covering her mouth in an attempt to hide a fit of giggles. He felt that familiar heat creep over his cheeks. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “I do normally have some table manners.”

“Don’t be,” she giggled. “I’m taking that as the highest compliment.” 

“You should. I can’t remember the last time I tasted anything that good.” 

“I have to imagine there weren’t a lot of bakeries on your campaigns during the war.”

“You’d be correct. There was one spot on Coruscant that we’d sometimes go to if we could scrape together enough credits, but those instances were few and far between.” The bakery had been one of Stones’s favorite places, a hidden gem with the most incredible jogan fruit sticky buns. They had sworn their unit to secrecy, afraid that their coveted baked goods would become limited in availability if word got out amongst the ranks. Only a few select brothers outside of the 28th had been allowed to know the secret, and only if they were certain to keep it quiet. Out of all of them, Commander Wolffe had taken it the most seriously and been the most dutiful about maintaining the secrecy. 

“You’re thinking of your brothers, aren’t you?”

Chuckles ducked his head under her golden stare. “Sorry.” 

“I know you probably have to get going soon so that the kids don’t get suspicious, but if you’d ever feel up for it, I’d love to hear more about your brothers. What they were like.” 

He met her gaze, and Maker, if he wasn’t made of sturdier stuff, he’d have turned into a puddle on the schoolhouse floorboards. The way she was looking at him didn’t hold an ounce of the pity he’d become accustomed to from natborns. She wasn’t looking at him as though he was some sacrificial creature that had survived a culling. Instead, there was genuine interest, kindness, and empathy staring back at him. He wanted to hug her. 

“I may take you up on that,” he said quietly. The thought of being able to share his brothers with someone else felt like a comfort. Of course, he’d spoken about them to Arni and Nita, but there were some things about them that kids wouldn’t understand. And some stories that they shouldn’t hear until they’re older. 

They watched each other quietly for another moment before Endi inhaled sharply, blinking rapidly and breaking the stare. “So, do you have a plan for tomorrow then?” 

“I do. Helly’s going to stop by in the morning under the ruse of delivering some of my gear for work, and while there, she’ll mention her hobby to Arni and offer to show the kid her specimens and sketches. Arni won’t be able to turn that down. They can’t resist any sort of educational activity, as you may have noticed.” She snorted into her cupcake as she took another bite, and he smiled as he continued. “After that, I’ll bring Nita here. I’ve promised to let her be in charge of decorations, so I think she’ll have a lot of opinions about where to hang what and how things should be organized. We’ll get things setup, and then Helly promised to send me a comm when she and Arni are heading this way. Boom. Surprise. Ooni’s parents also offered to make some punch, and Cen’s dads have some games they promised to bring. All in all, I think it’s about as good of a party as I could have hoped for.” He smiled up at her. “And I couldn’t have done it without you.” 

It was her turn to duck her head bashfully, some of the purple blush he’d noticed the first day he’d met her reappearing in her cheeks. “It was absolutely my pleasure. Your children are both delightful, and I know what it’s like to be a newcomer in this community. I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to make sure Arni knows they’re more than welcome here. As is Nita. And you.” 

He picked at a fingernail nervously. “I appreciate that. It’s been… hard for them. We thought the last place would be our home, but it just didn’t work out. Nita was devastated, and while Arni didn’t say as much, I know they took it hard as well.” He sighed. “I’m still figuring out this parenting thing, but Arni’s my rock. They hold it together when I can’t and take on far too much responsibility. Couldn’t have made it this far without them.” He met her gaze again. “So, I’m extra grateful you helped me pull this off for them. They deserve all of it and more, even though they’d never ask.” 

Endi’s eyes were sparkling. “They strike me as that kind of kid.” 

They sat in silence for a few more moments before Endi spoke again. 

“You can’t get out of that desk, can you?”

“Sure I can,” he retorted with mock annoyance. “It’s just going to be less than dignified.” 

Endi tipped her head back and laughed loudly. It sounded almost musical. Chuck beamed as his heart fluttered in his chest.

A/N: Bolts/Brienna was originally a reader-insert character that was first introduced in this ficlet and it's parts 2-4, so if you want to learn more about her and Chuck's history, I'd recommend checking those out. Heads up that they are all *spicy*.

Tag List: @seriowan @partoftheeternalsoul @rosmariner @misogirl828 @ellichonkasaurusrex @zoeykallus @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @gjrain20-starwars @staycalmandhugaclone @redheadgirl @fordo-kixed-rex @wizardofrozz @ariadnes-red-thread @extrahotpixels @justanothersadperson93 @leftealeaf @meekaielmyerhs99 @kaminocasey @echos-girlfriend @lucyysthings @obihiddlenox @merkitty49 @littlemissmanga @clonecyaree @baba-fett @sleepingsun501 @rexxdjarin @samspenandsword @babygirlrex0504 @ladytano420 @fxlsealarm @runforrestr @rennyboo @djarrex @corrieguards @the-cantina @witchklng @rain-on-kamino @ladykatakuri @arctrooper69 @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall

#karrde writes #one step at a time #osaat #OC Chuckles #OC Nita Ayyshu #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #clone oc #jedi oc #pantoran oc #twi'lek oc #found family #star wars #the clone wars #tcw

[fandom-friday]

Karrde's Fandom Friday Rec #1 (2/9/24)

Alright, first up for me this week is this BEAUTIFUL and HIGHLY UNEXPECTED surprise art of my OCs Chuckles, Nita, and Arni (from my fic One Step at a Time) that my dear friend @ninjigma did for my birthday. I lost my absolute marbles when Nin sent me this, and I have not stopped screaming about it/thinking about it since. Nin has played such an integral part in helping me visualize the entire Ayyshu family, and I just cannot get over all the details they included, from Nita's ADORABLE slippers to the stars on Arni's headgear. It's all perfect, and I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. THANK YOU AGAIN, NIN, YOU WONDERFUL HUMAN!

Participate in Fandom Friday to show your favorite creators from this week some love! :)

#FANDOM FRIDAY #creator appreciation #art rec #fan art #star wars #the clone wars #clone oc #jedi oc #twilek oc #pantoran oc #OC Chuckles #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #OC Nita #OC Nita Ayyshu #Oc Arni #OC Arni Ayyshu

[fandom-friday]

How can I not rec Chapter 15 of One Step at a Time??

@wild-karrde Babes, I’m sure you saw my unhinged comments already but omg you had me in the FEELS!! This chapter was one of the most powerful yet, and I’m still clutching my heart for Chuckles, Arni, and Nita 😭😭

Everything in this chapter, and even the story as a whole, is so beautifully mapped out and meaningful, and I’m just in love with it all!! I can’t wait to see what happens next (no pressure of course) 💙💙

Erin, my absolute beloved, you are too kind! Seriously, THANK YOU SO MUCH for the kind words about OSaaT! The last few chapters made me IMMENSELY nervous in terms of how they were going to be received, and comments like yours have been SO FRICKIN' LOVELY to read. I cannot thank you enough and am so very flattered you submitted my fic this week! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!

Participate in Fandom Friday to show your favorite creators from this week some love! :)

#FANDOM FRIDAY #creator appreciation #fic rec #fanfiction #fan fic #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #nsft #lemon #lemony lemon #clone OC #OC Chuckles #OC Chuckles Ayyshu #jedi oc #twilek oc #pantoran oc #OC Nita Ayyshu #OC Nita #OC Arni Ayyshu #OC Arni #angst #fluff #found family