#So I am asking you to hurt me

[you-can-be-what-you-want-to-be]

#slay the princess #orv #yoohankim #Can you tell there is something deeply wrong with me #LISTEN #the concept of #I trust you #And I love you #So I am asking you to hurt me #And trusting you to hurt me #I am. Insane. #Like who else would you ask if it was a request? #And who else would be hurt as much by such a request? #It’s so selfish to ask that of someone and yet- #Anyway just got to the 73rd demon king part #And Kim Dokja immediately going to Han sooyoung to get everyone to turn on him #Right after Joonghyuk tried to turn Dokja on him #Like two chapters after Dokja asked to be thrown at a monster- #I am insane #and the thorn route ooooh fuck #I hurt you so here’s the power to hurt me #The adversary #Heaven is being trapped with you forever in a constant cycle of violence #And when you are hurt I am still worried bc I’m not the one who did it #AND #the prisoner #EXPLICITLY SAYING THAT ALLOWING HER TO CUT OFF HER HEAD WAS A SIGN OF TRUST AND LOVE TO RUN AWAY #how cutting her is the main way to free her #I am so normal rn

[inkskinned]

you were raised in comparison.

it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.

you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.

you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.

what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.

it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.

you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.

you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?

a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.

you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.

it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.

something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.

#writeblr #warm up #my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky #i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles #yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help #for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT #and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen #than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say #''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help #i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.'' #bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't #actually offer fair support to everyone #we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less. #and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help #bc i DID have it better than other people #and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help. #we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn #instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself

[aenslem]

Then employ one of your own superstitions. Wish me luck.

#star trek #trekedit #startrekedit #tos #tosedit #tvedit #sd* #mine* #spones #sponesedit #leonard mccoy #leonard nimoy #bones #spock #deforest kelley #star trek tos #treksource #startrekgifs #are you okay? because i am not #this hurts me so much #absolutely love this pain but my god #whyyyy #he did not tell him. spock just goes on a sui*cide mission and asks bones to wish him luck #and bones does it when spock is not there anymore #have you seen the way spock leaves??? look me in the eyes and tell me he has no feelings #it's not int he gifset cos it would be too long and i already giffed entire scene like 4 y ago #but it;s just so... they are just so - im going insane here #imagine what's happening in spock's mind... and heart . he asked him SPOCK ASKED HIM and bones does it when spock cannot hear him #dammit bones aaaaaaaaaaaaaa tattoo this scene on me i love it

[taikk0]

the unspoken broflovski family curse

#added the doodle late oops #taikko art #dont ask me what happened to my old sketchy painted ish style when i first started making sp art #did you know?? that i enjoy?? not? hurting??????????? #its south park let me take it easy ugh finally i can draw in a style thats easy rottmnt artstyle kicked my ass #'why is kyles son wearing a different outfit?' i headcanon that kyles daughter is actually wearing hand me downs from him!! #i desperately need confirmed names omfg #I LOVE CHARACTERS WITH BARELY ANY CHARACTER TO THEM!! IT MEANS I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!! #me when i get to slap personalities and headcanons on characters that were on screen for less than a minute <3 #i need to read peoples headcanons on them please im so uncreative and i need to eat i am NOT self sustaining #south park #south park art #south park fanart #sp fanart #sp art #sp fandom #south park fandom #south park post covid #sp post covid #post covid #kyle #kyle broflovski #sp kyle #south park kyle #pc kyle #post covid kyle

[natelia-aldelliz]

Guys imagine, Roach died, before the creation of 141, but Soap is able to see his ghost. He was originally following Ghost around, really annoyed that he was using his death as an excuse to not get close to anyone, but when he found out Soap could see him and talk to him he started following him around instead.

And they get really close, like two peas in a pod, except they have to be discreet about it because no one else can see or hear Roach, and they'd think Soap was crazy if they saw him talking to no one.

They use that for shenanigans too: Roach will go follow someone else and report back to Soap, Gaz is genuinely starting to believe Soap has superpowers or something. It's really useful on missions as well, and Soap managed to successfully rescue team members thanks to Roach being able to move through walls and everything.

(Roach is not the only ghost Soap is able to see btw, just the only one he's talking to.)

And then Roach is witnessing his past lover trying really hard to not fall in love with Soap, and Soap trying really hard to not do anything about the love he already feels, and he has to try and convince Soap that he is dead. During that conversation he finds out that something else that keeps Soap from doing something is that he feels very confused about everything because he also has feeling for Roach.

So now Roach has to try and convince him that even if he was still alive he wouldn't have a problem with that. He's known for a while that he was polyamorous, but he hadn't really dared talking to Ghost about that because he thinks he's jealous and possessive.

And Soap is like "oh yeah, you want me to go say to Ghost 'don't worry about your dead lover that I'm not supposed to know, he's actually polyamorous and also in love with me, I know because his ghost told me!' ??? I'm sure he's gonna take that well!"

But Roach is nothing if not resourceful and he manages to put Soap in situations where he's forced to interact with Ghost, and eventually they kiss and their relationship is beginning to be something. They're not really sure what.

And Roach is sad, because he has to watch the two men he loves being in love without him, yes, but at least they're both happy, and it makes him feel a bit better. And then during a mission Ghost almost dies.

Because he was alone and Soap and Gaz were together, Roach was following Ghost this time, ready to fly to Soap in an instant if there was any problems. But there was and he didn't have time, so he instinctively grabbed the gun being pointed towards Ghost's head and moved it as the person was shooting, saving Ghost's life, giving him enough time to shoot the enemy himself.

But even as the threat is eliminated, Ghost is still looking up from where he's on the ground, staring right through him, looking shocked. No, not right through him, he realises when he moves to the side and Ghost's eyes follow him. He also realises that he grabbed the gun. He's never grabbed anything before, in all his years of being a ghost.

Then suddenly Ghost's eyes move wildly around, and he figures he disappeared from his view. He can still go through the walls, but he's kept the ability to grab stuff when he wants. It gives him a ton of new possibilities, to fuck with people and, of course, to touch Soap.

"I wish you were actually alive," Soap whispers to him, holding his hands against his face as he's falling asleep.

"What the fuck," comes Ghost's voice the next morning, waking both of them up - wait, since when could Roach sleep?

Soap doesn't understand immediately, because he's always been able to see Roach. But Ghost is standing in the door, looking straight at dead past lover.

Turns out Soap is a necromancer and he had no idea, though the whole 'I can see dead people' should probably have told him sooner that he wasn't normal... The more he wishes Roach is alive, the more he actually is. And they all end up happy and together. And Gaz is very happy to have won the bet that Soap indeed has superpowers.

The day Roach says, in a wondering voice, "I... I think I'm hungry" is the day they understand that something is really happening and he's actually coming back to life.

(Also, Soap has no control at all on his abilities, he has no idea what does what and why, he knows nothing. No one knows.)

#cod mw2 #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #gary roach sanderson #soapghost #ghostsoap #roachsoap #ghostroach #ghostsoaproach #accidental necromancer soap and ghost roach au #this is not organised at all bc my head has been hurting for days and i feel like i'm dying (i'm being overly dramatic don't worry) #this came to me when i was watching megamind don't ask me why #anyway i can't even read that again bc the words make no sense to me when my head hurts so sorry if it actually makes no sense for real lol #omg imagine ghost being interrogated bc someone reported him for sleeping with soap and he goes 'do i sleep with my sergeant? #yes i do but i don't only sleep with one of my sergeants i actually sleep with two of them; one having been dead for 4 years' #and they go 'dead as in... pronounced dead but actually alive?' 'no no dead as in actually dead as in buried; dead dead' #'so you *were* sleeping with him in the past?' 'no i am currently sleeping with him. with both of them.' #and then price has to gaslight sooo hard to make it all right they're literally taking years off his lifespan #and when he complains they giggle at him saying that it's alright bc soap will bring him back anyway if he dies for their sins

[spaceratprodigy]

*gulp* deacon/iris "please just kiss me" intimacy ask........ NYE party- (i am shot)

@oldworldwidgets — [ intimacy prompts ]

It's in the stars, it's been written in the scars on our hearts

We're not broken, just bent, and we can learn to love again

pose reference

#if u need me I'm gonna be on the floor thinking abt the doomed love of the disaster besties #aud.. aud my love my darling.. this little scene we crafted has been rotating nonstop in my brain for months #it has fundamentally ruined me #but it's so perfect it hurts so good I love seeing the lines blurring I love them not being able to get it right #struggling to communicate through the heartache *chefs kiss* #him.. him being the one to ask.. #I am unwell you are always sending me banger prompts my dear AND you always know how to help put my chaotic ramblings in the perfect words #OUGH miss aud oldworldwidgets I love you with my entire heart and soul you are such a ray of sunshine in my life #also I still have the other two intimacy prompts u sent me for them in my back pocket..... #I've had some ideas of how they can spend the night on the roof under the stars together...... #more on that later #ANYWAY #ilysm I am blowing you so many kisses rn #finally the people get to know who miss iris really kissed on new years eve on this fine day of *checks watch* valentine's day #(sorry nicky ✌😔 just bestie things u know how it is) #my art #sole survivor #fallout #fallout 4 #fo4 #deacon #deacon fallout 4 #deacon fo4 #oc x canon

[alchemania]

Finally got enough energy to talk about Furina's SQ and while I loved her and the troupe, MC and Paimon were .... Not Great. I talked about this with friends but in Paimon's case especially, the way they interact with Furina feels like people who just don't understand trauma and depression and then engage with someone suffering from both in all the wrong ways.

Talking about how much of a downgrade her house is from the opera house, making fun of how she can't cook, pushing her to act when she's set a very clear boundary and then guilt tripping her after she's stuck to her guns, shaming her for not being able to fight well (Paimon literally talks about how second hand embarrassment is overwhelming and I'm just like ?????), telling her she's "not acting like herself" when she attempts to open up and be vulnerable....it's just really rough. That and the MC asking "is something wrong" when Furina gets sad over Poission ..like bro people died and she couldn't save them and she's tearing herself apart over it. Those people are never coming back and you know it and you have the gall to ask her is something wrong??? Of COURSE there is!!

It just feels especially odd because we literally get to see all of Furina's suffering and Paimon in particular is. SO mean? Like she was more understanding with Wanderer and Ei and THEY'VE tried to kill us multiple times!! I don't get it, and honestly I'm very proud of Furina for refusing to waver. Let her rest!! She's tired and depressed and she needs time to heal; and honestly fuck Paimon for trying to make her feel bad. Furina's worked harder than she EVER will.

#as someone with depression and who's highly sensitive this story quest hurt a LOT because ive also encountered people who don't understand. #i've been told i need to get over my anxiety. i've been asked what am i so tired from since i just lay in bed. #so furina's character and how she was treated hit very very hard for me. she's isolating herself and not coping well but she is TRYING. #she's trying so hard and she equates her worth to her role. like she literally tells you that she serves no more use to anyone. #and i wanted to shake her so hard. because it's not about what she can do #she has worth simply because she exists. full stop. she is loved and she is appreciated just for being herself #her worth isn't decided by her power yk?? #i hope she can rest and heal and find some good friends - after the way mc and paimon treated her i honestly don't think they should be #or if they are; they'd have to work to earn her trust cuz good LORD. they treated her so weird and so tone deaf!! #i've seen a lot of people complaining about it too so im glad im not alone. #anyway. there is something wrong with me i have cried actual tears over furina please god she needs a hug #and to be told she did a good job and she can rest now and things will get better #4.2 spoilers #genshin impact #furina

[dimsilver]

🙏🏻

#please pray for me friends #my skin is the worst it’s ever been #about 90% of my body is inflamed #it really hurts #but honestly the mental toll is worse #I’m starting to notice serious effects and I feel like I go through all five stages of grief just trying to get ready in the morning #and yet it feels so silly because I know somehow I will go on like I have before #(but then again when will it end? when will it stop getting worse?) #anyway I’m in the trenches and I am so grateful for all the times y’all have interceded for me :) and I really need it now #please especially ask that I receive direction for next steps #because my second try at standard medical intervention is over :/ #also please let me know how I can be praying for you #if you want! #would love to return the favor :)

[perelka-l]

sometimes like this. But also like that.

#trainer kieran #rival kieran #hydrapple #kieran's hydrapple #cw: suggestive #aaand idk what else to tag this with but you know you can always ask me to throw in tags 'w' #man my hand hurts a bit after wee 3h of drawing??? geez #anyway had this idea in my head for maybe three weeks now and i am glad to have this one out #maybe i could work more on it but i dont wanna overdo myuself so #those two dont have a ship name and i'm sad #uhhh #cw: pokephilia #oh yeah that's an important bit lmao #watch me and my fail art #yeah it is a bit ns for t but i see no reason to not post so whatevvvvvv #yeehaw

[queenie-blackthorn]

sometimes i feel like i hate everyone

#if i ever say “i hate you” dont take it personally #everyone does stupid shit sometimes n thats fine but its happening sm and im sick of it n i need to speak up #chances are if u see this ur not part of the problem bc ur actually reading the shit i post #the fact that barely anyone realized that i relapsed into sh yesterday is crazy #im not doing this for attention its a fucking cry for help and most of yall are ignoring me #you ignore me when im fine and you ignore me when i need you #what am i supposed to do ffs #do i have to show you my bleeding thighs for you to ask how i am? #do you have to wait until i scream and cry and hurt myself for you to care abt me? #do i not matter unless im hurting? or do i not matter even when i am hurting? #do i have to fucking die for any of yall to realize theres something mentally wrong w me? #fuck you all youre just as bad as my parents #except for the four people who talked me out of spiralling last night #two of which were people i barely/dont know #so yeah maybe try harder n actually ask ur friends how they are #dont push them to the point where they need to be comforted by strangers

[greenishness]

You can’t force people to be honest with you. If you’re an up-front person who doesn’t have a problem asking for what you need, it can be easy to interpret wishy-washiness as cowardly and manipulative. It obviously sucks to be in emotional limbo, and I don’t blame you for interpreting their silence as a punishment. But have you considered it might also be a form of self-protection?

“Why won’t X tell me what’s wrong? I’m not a mind reader!” is a common complaint. But the question which often occurs to me is, who does that clarity benefit? Does the teller have reasonable grounds to believe expressing their anger is a safe or productive thing to do? Is it going to lead to deeper understanding, or just another argument? Is the person demanding an explanation going to listen, or use the teller’s complaint to retaliate, linguistically outmanoeuvre them, or adopt a position of victimhood? Often a request for clarity is disingenuous. We know what we’ve done and just don’t want to have to be the one to bring it up, because we feel guilty, and it’s easier to take a defensive posture than proactively apologise.

Not to mention that when we’re upset, the last thing we want is to give the person who offended us an opportunity to relitigate the situation. Especially if there’s wounded pride involved. It can be humiliating to confess the depth of your hurt feelings. That kind of honesty is an act of generosity, not emotional obligation. 

Help Me Hera: Our Couple BFF's Won't Forgive Us

#this has gotten me through the last month i am not even kidding not even a little bit . #it articulates something that i have been trying to put my finger on for a while now #that articulating the depth of your hurt and humiliation to the person responsible for it is an act of incredible vulnerability #and if you choose to do that i'm proud of you! but it is a privilege that you alone have to right to bestow #'i can't make it better if i don't know what' wrong' is such an insidious way of reversing power dynamics #and frankly an incredibly entitled way to view the world like who asked you to make it better? maybe you'll just have to stew #no one is obligated to share their innermost self with you no matter how badly you want them to #and if you cannot accept that very basic boundary then i have an idea why someone else might be so mad at you

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

got so into my laughingstock feels that i burnt my fuckign toast

#shit was Black #literally was in my kitchen Wailing about them and forgot the bread slices i put in the toaster oven three seconds prior #s'ok i made a new set but oughhhhhh i am still sooooooo so unwell about them.... #OUGHHHHHHH THEMMMMMMM #theyre just... snf.... theyre just two silly goofy guys in love.... #silly goofy fruity fellas and they love each other <3 #SIDE NOTE GINGER SPREAD ON HONEY/BUTTER TOAST ABSOLUTELY FUCKS TRUST ME ON THIS #absolutely unprompted #but yea i was specifically thinking about that fic i have in my head #yall know the one by now. the one i desperately want to write and I SWEAR I WILL EVENTUALLY #but the fuckin... Misunderstanding... it makes me insaneeeee #its the most unhealthy part of their relationship AND THEY ARENT EVEN IN A RELATIONSHIP YET #damn theyre so healthy. theyre so. wails screams howls #but howdy being an oblivious idiot to his own emotions is so important to me #mans is whip smart & quick in every other area #but in this One Subject hes dumb as a rock & that hurts both of them <3 #but it also turns into something they can cry w/ laughter over later #someone asks how they got together. they exchange a look. and burst out howling #full on wheeze-laughing Cannot Form Words #y'see most couples would have some lingering 'i cant believe you did that' and/or guilt #but barn & howdy would just find it hysterical. full on 'remember when you-' 'yeah lmfao' #THEYRE SOOOOOO <3 #yknow if i ever find someone i want to have a partner-esque relationship. i want to have what laughingstock has #i do genuinely believe that howdy might have feelings for barn #but i like to live in the delusional world of my mind where they're Established <3 #grabbing them and slamming them together like a violent 5 yr old playing with dolls #kiss! kiss damn you!

[seaweedstarshine]

Hi! Long time no yap but I've been really bothered by this thing and I know you're just the person I can go to with this (even if we don't always end up agreeing at times).

I got into a tiff with someone in a comments section of a post that was about Amy (Which character do you think deserved to become a villain? or something similar). They brought up Amy's abuse of her boyfriend. I may have tried to defend Amy (key word is tried. I am officially rubbish at debating) but then I may have said something? Because they said that I (and apparently a lot of other fans) was excusing Amy's abuse because of her trauma. It got me stumped because isn't young Amy's treatment of Rory rooted in her trauma? Did I miss the memo where we separate trauma and abuse? Am I missing something?

That statement bothered me a lot because if there's one thing I never want to do it's defend an abuser. So here I am, humbly asking and hoping to clear the muddy waters.

Your really confused and disturbed moot, Tia 💌

TIA!!!!! Thanks for the ask 💌 , and I send you all the hugs.

Discussion of abuse, trauma, ableism, infidelity, and unhealthy relationship dynamics beneath the cut.

(First off… while I really appreciate your faith in my explaining skills <3 <3 <3 my passion for traumatized characters and mentally ill+neurodivergent rights doesn't make me especially qualified to fully clear muddy waters especially not knowing the full context, but I feel you, and what follows is my informed perspective!)

Speaking generally first, harm done in media is best examined by the impact on the audience, with a different lens than harm done to real people. While relatable experiences in media can be useful and validating and incredibly important, you can’t be “defending an abuser” when the abuse is fictional. It's actually normal for traumatized/ND/mentally ill people to project onto mentally ill villains, when villains are the only significant representation for those stigmatized symptoms in a media landscape that excludes and demonizes us simply for existing. RTD can't stop people who hallucinate from reclaiming the Master's Drums and projecting onto the Master, for example — 90% of the best Doctor Who psychosis fic by psychotic authors is about the Master, whether RTD likes it or not. It's not true crime.

(This is speaking generally. Amy Pond is very much not the Master.)

Abuse is a behavior, and there can be many reasons for it, but reasons based in trauma don’t make it not abuse (some forms of generational trauma can propagate abusive parenting styles, when the parent thinks abusive parenting is normal, or lives entirely vicariously through their child). This absolutely should not be taken to mean trauma correlates with abusive behavior; rather that abusive behaviors from traumatized people are more likely to present in specific ways.

Abuse is also a targeted behavior, based in control — not consistently displayed C-PTSD symptoms as seen in Season 5 Amy Pond through many aspects of her life. Mental health symptoms don't become abuse just because they hinder one partner from meeting the other partner's needs. Any life event can do that.

Without knowing the context of the arguments, this is the aspect of their relationship I've seen you talk about before (which I also feel strongly about), and what I assume is what you were debating? So, here I will talk specifically in regard to Season 5.

We all know Amy — she's never attached to Leadworth because she never wanted to leave Scotland, no steady therapist because none of them stick up for her, can't stick with one job yet her first choice is a job that simulates intimacy because her avoidant behavior (a known trauma response) isn't sustainable to her wellbeing. Rory knows her fears of commitment stem from her repeated abandonments, it’s why he’ll always wait for her, and it's why he blames the Doctor “You make it so they don't want to let you down.”, who apart from having caused a lot of her trauma, has actively taken advantage of her being the “Scottish girl in the English village” who's “still got that accent,” because he wants to feel important, so yeah, I think interpreting Amy's issues (and how Amy and Rory transverse them) as Amy abusing Rory indicates a fundamental misunderstanding of their relationship, as well as a misunderstanding of the (raggedy) Doctor’s role in Amy’s formative self-image (which of course she works through in Season 6, but I am sticking to Season 5).

Abuse is always based in control. That just doesn’t fit here. While Amy's detachment from her real life includes things like calling Rory her “kind of boyfriend” (which she is upfront about to his face; differing commitment levels isn't abuse, though it can be a relationship red flag for both parties IRL) — her Season 5 disregard of Rory’s feelings occurs only in response to the fairytale embodiment of her trauma. It's never a response to Rory; it's a response to the Doctor, who stole her childhood and led her by the hand to her death. She cheats on Rory with the Doctor in her bedroom full of Doctor toys, drawings, models, she made from childhood to early adulthood.

(And yes, like many repeatedly-traumatized people, Amy is prone to being sensitive and reactive. Take her “Well, shut up then!” line in The Big Bang; but given Rory responds to this by hugging her, clearly he doesn’t take it as her actually dismissing him. He knows her better than that.)

And by no means do I meant to imply this is fair to young Rory, poor Rory, who's left struggling with the feeling that his role in her life is in competition with the role of her trauma (aka the Doctor). But not every unhealthy relationship dynamic is unhealthy because of abuse. Labelling Amy's treatment of Rory in Season 5 more accurately isn't the same as excusing her harmful choices — but making mistakes is part of being human, Amy's mistakes are certainly understandable, and she works through them out of love for Rory.

If there's one thing to say about Moffat women, it's that Moffat allows his female characters the same grace that the male characters *coughTENcough* have always had, to hurt and struggle and make realistic mistakes and overcome those mistakes and to heal without being demonized.

Amy isn't perfect, but she is a fully realized character, and her story gives us a resonant depiction of childhood trauma.

#abuse #rtd critical #anti rtd #im NOT really anti rtd but im tagging it that because some people block that tag and uhhhh this post strays into rtd critique #maybe he does regret how he wrote the master! we'll never know because rtd is very anti-admitting-his-own-mistakes #words by seaweed #anyways tia i am. SO relieved you’re not upset with me about our last disagreement? #i high key jumped to conclusions after the lack of reply to the last DM? so thank you for this ask it's great to hear from you #sorry you were in a debate about this! that sounds extremely awful. #anyway i'm gonna WAIT at least a week to tag Amy and Rory to avoid this showing up in the character tags right away haha #because I am KINDA scared the anti-media-literacy ppl will find this (I had to include the first part tho its important) #(lack of distinction between harm to audience *in fiction* and irl harm *to actual ppl* leads to problematic public apologies where- #-public figures apologize to fans they let down *instead* of the people they actually hurt. no it doesn't work like that) #(parasocial relationships are not more important than real victims agency or privacy) #editing to say..... yanno what? ive come to terms with not all the posts with the following tag been about the doctor #and I am planning to make a post at some point about the nd aspects of Amy+the Doctor's connection which this stuff IS relevant to soooooo #(eleventh) doctor is neurodivergent tag #editing again to add character tags: #Amy pond #Rory williams

[milkweedman]

The new meds I'm on have, as far as I can tell, caused my hands to be very weak, to the point that I can't tension this thin sock yarn :/ I'm in the gussets of sock 2 but the sock is definitely bigger and a thinner fabric.

Im... not positive what to do (whether to frog or not, or maybe just switch to a worsted weight project?) Other than tell the doctor this shit is not good.

#if i frog its a full day of knitting wasted #i also really would like these socks tho. i need another good pair... #i did say id knit a thick pair of socks for my sister and thats the only other project i can think of #my hands also hurt so bad from attempting to tension anyway #also. i ASKED the doc what the side effects would be ! #and she said 'just your standard NSAID side effects' #well i checked the page and no they are fucking not. they are not at all and also have huge glaring warnings saying #DONT TAKE IF YOU DONT RESPOND WELL TO OTHER NSAIDS #i am allergic to nsaids and she knows that and i told her that as she was prescribing it to me and she brushed it off #pain management clinic where they put you in more pain. great. #disability #knitting #i am desperately hoping its my meds and the timing would make sense #if my hands just do this now i will cry

[tokyogruel]

thank you for a beautiful new year

[please, do not repost this image. likes and reblogs are welcomed]

#creature speaks #my art #ahhh imnso tired #i am so very tired #all of the images used in this artwork are my own #i was certain i had more images of flowers but apparently not... i have to remedy this next year #if you would like to see a version of this without text. please dm me- i cant guarantee ill be comfortable sending so to everyone #but it never hurts to ask i suppose

[averlym]

4 on the angst list with Araleyn please I need them to suffer

4 : "but it's my fault, right?" (prompt list here)

#<blinks> very gently implied angst i suppose. usually everyone makes anne suffer so for a change #here's catherine struggling with the idea that if she hadn't been so stubborn about divorce- #maybe it would have been more okay for henry to divorce anne instead of. yknow. chopping her head off. #gently implied angst with the. well. i hurt this person i care about. unintentionally. but still. hence also the historical counterparts bg #... i feel like this isn't suffering (italicised for emphasis) but unfortunately? i am in a more melancholy mood #and also coming to conclusion that whump isnt really my taste.. so quite literally you'd have to pay me to draw it .. dfdsghjkl comms open #anyways yeah i think the most you'll get from my own stuff is <reference to beheading> <mentioned death> <abstract reds that might be blood #six the musical #six the musical fanart #anne boleyn #catherine of aragon #pssst drew anne extra pretty bc coa pov. if you get what i mean. #oh that got off tangent. but also tldr; requests mean free art!! (also idm if you ask for specific things. like your own aus. just to put #that out there) #but also requests: 1. up to my creative freedom and discretion so you probs won't get exactly what you want + 2. no time limit so #can take literal years to reply to. #so ig ? if you have specific things in mind. that you want me to draw. commissions would be better for you if you'll pay! #but if you don't have the money i'm also. lowkey willing to draw for free.. stick it in the inbox .. there's just no guarantee you'll get it #within the next year.. or at all! but you may as well try your luck o.O #(this plan is terrible for business but because for a very long time i was unable to buy anything online. i sympathise greatly ig)