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#a stroke 2 years ago
aibidil · 10 months
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Oh, friends. I'm sitting here with my dog dying on my lap. Send us some love and strength?
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seventh-district · 5 days
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#Seven’s Public Diary#vent post#vent#cw vent post#cw vent#cw health#cw medical#cw medication#cw death#death mention#after nearly 2 weeks of unexplained pain and Symptoms and working myself up into the worst panic attack of my life#i finally caved and went to urgent care :)#it’s not lost on me that the same thing happened a little over a year ago. not bc of the same symptoms but it’s the same fear of dying#smthn smthn if i had a nickel smthn smthn weird that it happened twice. i rlly hope this doesn’t become a pattern#i can picture it now. every spring i walk in and they’re like ‘ugh it’s the neurotic hypochondriac with 4 anxiety disorders again 🙄#wonder what they think they’re dying of this time!’#sigh. anyways i’m fine. probably.#the consensus was ‘no you’re Probably not gonna have a stroke and die. you’re just Very stressed and in a lot of pain.’#got diagnosed with Stressed Guy Syndrome so now i take ✨painkillers✨ and ✨muscle relaxers✨ 🙃#they wanted me to take a steroid shot too but that felt like overkill. it’s also a big step for me to be willing to take anything at all#not bc i’m scared of getting a shot in the neck i’m just. scared of medication in general. the side effects. the potential for dependency.#it’s only for a week but i’m still uncomfy with it. but it Is nice to be in less pain. tho i have my doubts that it’ll help long term#time will tell. but i still can’t shake the fear of the tiny chance that it Could be more serious. but it’s not big enough for them to test#for it so. just gotta live with the fear. which in turn is making it hard to relax. which is what i’m supposed to be doing. so.#anyways. i Hope the meds work and i don’t end up back there next week spending More money and seeking more treatment#sighhhh i just can’t catch a break these days. it’s Always Something#at least the electricity and internet are back on after the tornado last week. and at least i’m not in much pain for now. silver linings.#sorry to everyone i’ve unintentionally ghosted but it’s been hard to think through the pain and now the meds are making me eepy#hopefully i’ll recover and recharge my social battery sooner than later. bc i do feel v bad abt it#and it’s So nice to sleep without much pain so i’m. taking advantage of that this week. Seven Try To Relax Challenge 2024
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alistairs · 11 months
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theforesteldritch · 10 months
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tater tot’s death has me crying in the middle of the night. Rest In Peace little buddy you fought so hard until the end and deserved everything and the world is worse without you in it
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munch-mumbles · 10 months
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GRR a lot of my paranoia about my heart health has been coming back lately
#it used to be pretty bad a few years ago and im starting to get there again#its hard for me not to pay attention to my pulse to check that its still working fine because i honestly have a pretty big fear of dying#from a heart attack stroke etc#i can literally remember the day that it became a phobia of mine because in bio class we were reading an exerpt about a womans symptoms#as she was experiencing a stroke and like. i literally freaked myself out about it AS i was reading it i starting panicking#specifically the mention of your left art losing sensation sticks in my mind#a few days ago i read a few comments on a post about people who knew someone who died at their job#and a lot of them were about people who literally just. up and died for no reason. sitting at their desk. THAT freaked me out#cause that seems like a way id die is just out of fucking nowhere thats my luck#anyways im writing this because ive had like 2 borderline panic attacks about it today and i could feel myself freaking out a third time#a minute ago so i startd writing. thumbs up#i know im thinking irrationally but no one who dies of a heart attack expects to die. right. im probably not going to expect#it its going to Happen To me#ive read too many stories about people who either had one themself and survived or talking about someone they knew#where they say they could feel the doom and that something was wrong and etc. so when i start getting nervous it keeps snowballing#immediately into FUCK ITS THE DOOM THIS IS THE BIG ONE#when its literally not
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davidbyrne · 1 year
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WE ARE SO BACK
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cannot-copia · 2 years
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Mental Health Check for the Ghesties! How we doin'?
uh
ive been better
ik i like never respond positively to these asks, I’m sorry whoever you are
but thank you for asking <3
also sorry to those who’ve tagged me in tag games the past while too, i do like them but between working for the past 14 days straight and some more not good things happening irl i have not had time to do them and now i probably won’t find them
#tw for death/illness/unalive thoughts for these tags ig#idk if I’ve mentioned it but#my dad has dementia diabetes lung issues heart issues has fallen/has had strokes and has been on dialysis for 2 years now#long story but we had to put him in assisted living a few months ago#bc we couldn’t take care of him at home anymore he’d fall or try and do things he shouldn’t#(ie drive when he says himself he can’t see and has only 1 working eye)#or didn’t control his bowels/bladder#would cuss us out tell us to go to hell etc#so he’s been there for a while where they are trained to take care of people like that#and he wouldn’t be alone while we are at work and stuff#but he hates it and last time I visited him there he said he didn’t want to be in this world anymore and said how he wanted to step in front#of a bus and stuff which did not help the guilt I already feel about him having to be there#but there is no choice if he didn’t have to be there he wouldn’t be we don’t have the money to pay for it#and now he’s been in and out of the hospital several times over the past few weeks#and went again Monday bc they thought he had another stroke (slurring his words/not walking straight and other things)#they found out he didn’t but what they thought was wrong has been treated and he’s not better#and now they’ve discussed him going to a nursing home or even hospice#but they so far have no plans of discharging him so he’s obviously not doing good#and that’s on top of other things that i don’t feel like i should even complain about when that is going on#so yeah I am not doing the best tbh#been trying not to think about it bc every time I do i feel like either throwing up or crying or both#sorry for the tag info dump#delete later#probably#asks
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oatbugs · 2 years
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leaving holes (grief-deep clawmarks) on quincentenarian floors
#i saw my friend whom i met here the night b4 last night she gave me her bracelet ill think abt her forever#she was sipping on amaretto and she almost started crying she was talking abt how she wishes she didnt have to leave#and last year she hated it here and she grew to love it this year and actually globalisation and the transient nature of our#lives doesnt allow us to settle down and while its a wonderful opportunity she is tired of grieving everything she left behind#i know some constellations but ive not been able to identify in them in the sky for a while#3 days ago i traced the tattoo of someone with white hair and brown roots and piercings and a deep sense of guilt and a deeper addiction#of transient experiences . i looked up at the night sky (one hand in theirs their eyes on my neck) and i could finally see it#little bear on their arms in the sky in our eyes#a girl with black eyeliner and black hair and red lipstick marks all over her face told me about futile efforts and the way in which#transient experiences are the reason you weep and so by extension are the reason you grin . no laughter without the wailing.#stroked a cat i left behind i made a star on their hand watched the sunrise over the sea over and over and over and it was never enough#i grew up by the ocean and i become trapped when i leave the saltwater taste of it behind i grew up in a city and i become trapped when#i am not inhaling every kind of cancerous smoke there is. around people in a rush around random eye contact around the 4-minute friendships#in the underground around the million transient experiences you are hosted to . youve been here for 2 years youve been here your whole life#i wanted to kiss her so bad. or maybe i was fascinated by the idea of biting her collarbones . i wish i had slept in her house longer.#transience holds you like a gun.
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yvmoveon · 2 years
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nihilisticlinguistics · 4 months
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would love it if modern technology would work 2 days in a row
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rustyr3dhe4d · 3 months
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unexpected (2) - cl16
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summary: a few years ago, you found yourself unexpectedly pregnant with your boyfriends baby. upon telling him, he completely disappeared and you hadn't heard from his since. of course you told your best friend, charles. he vowed to help you before and after the birth. fast forward a couple of years, what happens when your child assumes charles is her father.
!part 1 here!
⋆ ˚。 ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。 ⋆
you sat in charles' driver room, waiting for him to come back from media duties. he'd made it on podium, taking third place and you couldn't be happier. you stroked your daughter's hair as she slept peacefully next to where you were sitting.
soon, charles appears through the door. "hey, you did so good today." you told him as you brought him into a tight hug. "thank you, amour." his arms wrapped around your waist, head tucked tightly between your head and shoulder.
you rubbed his back comfortingly, knowing how tired he was. once he pulled away, he took in adelines sleeping figure. he squats down and places a light kiss on her head.
in the silence you both sat down on the small table in his room. you know the elephant in the room was going to be talked about sooner or later.
"do you want to talk about, you know... what adeline called you earlier?" your fingers began fidgeting nervously as you brought up the topic. he looked down at his feet. "it's okay, i know she's young and she doesn't know about everything."
"i'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable." you place your hand on his, which he takes it and intertwines your fingers.
ever since you found out you were pregnant up to the birth of your daughter, charles was next to your side every single step. he was there with you at every appointment, every breakdown, and every kick she gave you. he was even there holding your hand as you brought adeline into the world.
even though she's not biologically his, he's been a father figure to her. "no, it didn't make me uncomfortable." he looks to her. "in a way, it made me feel good."
you turn to him with furrowed brows. "she doesn't understand the full extent of what happened with her real dad yet, but i'm glad she sees me in that way."
you can't help but feel your heart swoon. there was always a little thought in the back of your mind that you wished charles was adelines father. but you brushed it off every time it came to light. "i understand," you swallow. "part of me wishes sometimes... that you were actually adelines father."
his words cause him to look at you quickly. "really?"
"it's just, when i told my ex i was pregnant and he left, i never felt so alone. but you stepped up and have been more of a father to her than he could've ever been." you can't help but get choked up on your words.
he lets go of your hand and pulls you close, placing a kiss on your head. "i will always be there for you two. no matter what." he whispers to you.
you pull back and look at him, tears still in your eyes. his hands cup your face as he places a sweet kiss to your lips. you weren't expecting it but it feels right. "she's obsessed with you, you know?" you chuckle through your tears.
he can't help but laugh slightly with you. "had a feeling." he moves his hands from your face to hold your hands in your lap. "if it's okay, i would be more than honored to take the role of addy's father. i want to be there, for her and you."
you read his eyes and they hold pure truth behind them. you can't help but smile big and nod. "that's more than okay." you tell him as you place another kiss on his lips.
you hear shuffling coming from your daughter as she wakes up. "hi, my love." you tell her as she climbs into your lap. you can tell she's still sleepy and ready to go. "are you ready to go, papillon?" charles asks her sweetly.
she rubs her eyes tiredly and nods. as soon as he stands, she's reaching for him. you smile and roll your eyes as he scoops her up and carries her. you collect both your stuff and charles stuff and head out of the paddock.
you get to the car and charles goes in the back, to strap her to her car seat. "alright get some more sleep, i love you papillon." he tells her, placing a kiss on her forehead like he did earlier.
"love you daddy..." she mumbles before nodding off to sleep again. you smile at charles, who's dimples are now on display from the smile he gives you.
"looks like she's already used to you." he grabs your hand and opens your door, helping you get in. "let's go home shall we?" he suggests.
you simply nod, as he closes your door once you're settled in the passenger seat. he gets in the driver's seat, starts the car and drives off.
you sigh in content, looking back at your daughter asleep in her car seat and the man you now have the utmost love and adoration for.
you're new little family.
⋆ ˚。 ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。 ⋆
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hazbinwhoree · 4 months
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BRO?$!&?& OAAA I SAW YOU WERE OPEN TO ADAM REQUESTS AND OHHH. MY SNAP.
i am in desperate need. of adam smut.
NOW, WOULD IT BE OKAY FOR ME TO ASK FOR ADAM SMUT WITH A SUBMISSIVE FEMALE SINNER READER WHO IS:
usually shy nervous as fuck but absolutely watches him when he thinks he isn't looking
likes to compliment him in general (at the most random times too, despite the dickmaster being the FUCKING WORST, and she would get that but he IS kinda fine so)
touch-starved, incredibly easy to fluster and tease (bro has a thing for his voices and looks too, one word or look and she'd be on her knees)
pretty insecure in general (and is a sucker for being praised in bed)
I'd also specifically like to hear what he would say to the reader ESPECIALLY THAT IDFK AAA GO CRAZY
Adam’s Sinner
Part 1/3 Part 2
A/N: I was so fucking happy to get a request you don’t even understand. Anyway here it is, I hope I did it justice and you enjoy it!
Warnings: Smut
Adam had been aware of (Name) for about ten years. They met during the extermination, Adam cornering her in an alley. Something compelled him to spare her, and yes he realized what a hypocrite that made him. Poor Vaggie. “Fucking run, bitch.” She bolted. Adam looked around to make sure no one had seen.
The next year, Adam noticed (Name) watching him, hiding behind corners and in shadows. She did this during every extermination for about five years before Adam decided during one extermination to confront her.
(Name) peered around the corner of the dark alley she was hiding in, watching Adam kill a fellow sinner. It should disgust her, but ever since he spared her life she had a strange sort of attraction towards him. Adam looked up and (Name) ducked back behind the wall. When she peered out again, Adam was nowhere to be seen.
“What’s up, sugar tits?”
(Name) yelped, jumping when Adam appeared behind her. He put his hands on the wall on either side of her head, effectively caging her in. (Name) could feel her face heating up. Adam seemed to find it amusing. “Flustered?” (Name) swallowed.
“You know I’ve seen you watching me for the last few exterminations. What’s up with that, hm?”
(Name) had no answer.
“What’s your name?” Adam asked.
“(Name),” she answered quietly. Adam had to bend down to hear her. His proximity made her blush worse, and he snickered. “I think I figured out why. No surprise really, of course you’d want a piece of the first man in existence. I’m the fucking Dickmaster.”
He let her go shortly after their exchange, but confronted her again the next year. As years passed, Adam would spare thirty minutes every extermination to talk to (Name). He found himself becoming fond of the sinner. Her story of how she ended up in hell was interesting, and it definitely helped that she stroked his ego with compliments.
Adam found himself looking forward to seeing (Name) even more than he looked forward to the exterminations. He was grateful Lute hadn’t caught on.
A few years later, and Adam noticed (Name) wasn’t following him as she normally would. So he sought her out. She’d told him a few years ago where she lived, so that was the first place Adam checked. Sure enough, he found her there.
“Sup.”
(Name) jumped. “Adam!”
“What the fuck, babe, not interested in seeing me this year?” Adam placed his hand over his heart in mock hurt, although while he’d never admit it, it actually did hurt him.
“We can’t see each other anymore,” (Name) announced, looking away.
“Bitch why?”
“Because one of these days we’re going to get caught. I know what happened to Vaggie. What would happen if the exterminators found out their leader was socializing with a sinner?”
“You’re not like the other sinners,” Adam argued. “I’d show them that.”
“How?”
Adam was quiet.
“Exactly. And to be honest, I can’t take the emotional torture anymore.”
“The fuck are you on about, ‘emotional torture’? Come on babe-”
“Adam no. I can’t let myself get any closer to you. We only see each other once a year and I got attached, and dealing with only seeing you once a year has gotten too painful.”
Adam was rather taken aback by the confession. He felt the same way but had been gaslighting himself to believe he didn’t. For once in his life, Adam couldn’t find anything to say. He decided the best course was the course of action rather than talking.
He leaned down and abruptly pressed his lips to (Name)’s. Her eyes widened and her body stiffened. When Adam received no response on her end, he pulled back, worried he’d fucked up. She stared up at him with this look on her face that Adam couldn’t place. He didn’t know if it was positive or negative.
“Again,” she finally spoke in a small voice. A smirk stretched across Adam’s face, and he bent down once more to press his lips to hers. She kissed him back this time, almost desperately, and Adam’s arms wrapped around her waist. She shuddered and he pulled back.
“Are you okay?” No teasing or cursing.
“Yeah I just… I haven’t had anyone touch me like this in a long time.”
Adam couldn’t say the same, but this was the first time in a long time emotions had been involved. He kissed her again and snuck his tongue into her mouth as she kissed back. “I want to fuck you,” Adam mumbled against her lips. “Okay.”
Adam pushed her down on her bed, crawling on top of her. He reconnected their lips and slid a hand under her shirt. “Damn,” he commented when his wandering hand reached her chest. “Nice rack.” (Name) rolled her eyes. Adam began kissing down her neck, sucking and biting to leave his mark. (Name) moaned and grabbed onto his horns.
Adam pulled back to shed his robe, and (Name) yanked her shirt over her head. Now that Adam actually had eyes on her chest, he stared for a moment. “So pretty~” he cooed. (Name) blushed and swallowed.
“Oh~” Adam realized. “You like that, don’t you? You like being praised?”
(Name) looked away. Adam grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at him. “Don’t be embarrassed, babe, it’s cute.” He returned to her neck, kissing down and down, her shoulder, her collarbone. Then he slid down slightly to press his face between her breasts. He laid more kisses on her chest before taking a nipple into his mouth.
Sensitive, (Name) arched her back and whimpered. “I like that noise,” Adam said, moving to the other breast. “Make it again.” He sucked and she whimpered.
Adam was aware he had a short window of time to make this work, so he pulled back and pulled down (Name)’s pants and panties in one swift motion. (Name) got embarrassed being so exposed, so Adam quickly shed his own pants and boxers to level the playing field.
He noticed (Name) staring at his dick and smirked. He took it in his hand, pumping it a few times for show. “You like what you see, baby? Of course you do. Can’t beat the original dick.”
He crawled on top of her again, nudging her thighs apart with his knee to settle between them. He reconnected their lips while his hand traveled down to the place she wanted it the most. “So wet for me, good girl,” Adam teased. Flustered, (Name) shut him up with another kiss.
They made out while Adam experimentally slid one slender finger into her. Met with no resistance, he added another one, and began languidly pumping them in and out. (Name) was shaking. Eager to hurry this along, Adam added another finger. Three stretched her out and she moaned against his lips at the sensation. It made Adam’s dick throb.
He fingered her, with his thumb circling her clit, until he decided she was well enough prepared, pulling his hand away. (Name) whined at the loss but was quickly shut up by Adam grabbing her legs and throwing them over his shoulders. She gasped. Adam lined himself up with her entrance and sunk in slowly, giving her time to adjust. She squirmed, his girth proving to be a little painful to take.
Adam reached between them to give her clit attention, and that loosened her up right away. He bottomed out with a groan, closing his eyes. “Fuck, babe, you’re so tight.” Adam kissed her again, basically bending her in half as he began thrusting. He swallowed her whimpers and moans while his pace picked up in speed and intensity.
He had tried to be slow and gentle, he really had.
Adam set a brutal pace, and (Name) clawed at his back as he pounded into her. “Fuck, yeah, you’re so good for me, tits. Such a good girl, all mine,” Adam talked as he fucked her, and his every word brought (Name) closer to the edge. “You feel so fucking good.”
Adam’s thrusts were getting sloppy as he neared his own climax. “Cum for me,” he murmured. “Fucking cum for me, baby.” (Name) did, her back arching off the bed, her head thrown back and mouth open in slack pleasure. Her tightening around him pushed Adam over the edge, and he buried himself as deep as he could, cumming inside her.
They both panted, holding onto one another as they came down from their highs. Adam pulled out and rolled off of (Name), collapsing onto the bed next to her. He pulled her into his chest and covered her with one of his wings, nuzzling his face into her hair.
“I’ll find a way to see each other more,” he muttered. “I’ll figure something out.” (Name) buried her face in his chest. “Promise?” Her voice was muffled.
“Promise.”
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verinarin · 5 months
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How Ratio handles his reckless partner during a mission
I wrote this as a character study to better understand and illustrate how he treats people he respects and trusts (*´꒳`*)
So fluffiest fluff ever; in Ratio’s standards ofc
Please tell me if you guys want a part 2 of this ٩( ᐛ )و
Part Two ψ(`∇´)ψ - Part Three (о´∀`о)
Support me on Ko-fi ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
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“I often wonder how does the IPC’s HR department handles the recruitment process,” he sighs as he walks towards your body slumped to the floor as a result of your trademarked clumsiness
He stood there beside you waiting for you to sprung back to life like you usually do “How rude, for your information I aced my test,” you huff as you dust off your hands
“Is that so ?,” he replies candidly, he continues to leave you behind without much thought, he knows you possess some qualities that’s befitting for a investor but still you’re too clumsy and reckless at times
Hence why the higher ups assign him as your supervisor or so to speak, he acknowledges your lack of experience as well as your potential that’s why he agreed to be your supervisor
But he didn’t sign up to be your babysitter….
“Wait up would ya?,” you whine as you quickly jog to be by his side
He tilted his head to the side, studying you from afar to assess any damages on your body from the fall earlier “Time awaits for no one,”
“Please do think before anything else, stop making a fool out yourself while representing the IPC,” he continues his statement as he paced himself to be slightly slower for you to catch up
You huff feeling a little bit dejected by his statement but it’s the truth and from this past year of working beside him, you knew he always have your best interest at heart, well even though most of the times he verbally bullies you
“Yes yes of course Mr. Ratio,” you smile as you walk beside him, you notice that he slowed down his pace earlier, it made you smile to know that behind that rude demeanour he does care a lot
He steal a glance at your expression before resuming to look at the road ahead, he can’t help but to feel comfort in knowing that you didn’t seem to take his words to heart
He always finds it hard to express his truth towards others because to be frank the truth hurts, yet the pain itself is a important element to achieve improvement, pain used as a motivation of sorts
Most people deemed his truthful nature to be harmful yet you’re astoundingly adept in his true nature, you easily read between the lines and see his objective clearly
“Can I ask you something ?,” his sudden inquiry surprises you, it is usually you who do the asking, you deem this as a pleasant surprise
“Sure go ahead,” you reply casually while masking your excitement, he rarely does this so you’re ecstatic
“I know you’re both emotionally and intellectually intelligent, but I can’t seem to grasp why you’re so reckless at times,” he smiles as he ask this question, he’s mostly likely to remember a gamble you took a few weeks ago
Well granted you almost lose your life by gambling your life away in a literal sense to gain a dictator’s trust towards the IPC, but at least you won
Ever since that stunt, Ratio seems to respect you more although afterwards he berated your gamble for two hours straight
“Audaces fortuna iuvat,” you reply as you stare at his face, his merely scoffs as he took notice of the philosophy behind your statement
In a sudden trance he leans down towards your face, ardently reading through your flustered expression caused by the sudden close proximity “Fortune favours the bold, that’s very true to yourself,” his voice deepens as it is drenched in sultriness
Well this is an uncharted territory between you both-
He then leans back towards his previous position, smirking as he relish in your dumbstruck expression, he gently strokes your hair as a sign of acknowledgement something you didn’t knew you enjoyed before
“Now then we should get going, our next meeting is due in approximately 13 minutes,” he stated as he retracts his hand away and leaves you behind yet again but this time speechless and flustered
“H-hey !, what was that about ?,” you huff as you try to catch up with him, not knowing that he’s currently blushing himself underneath that cold exterior of his
“What have I done..” he mutters as he covers his face with his alabaster head
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shemybitchhh · 3 months
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𝕃𝕚𝕥𝕥𝕝𝕖 𝕋𝕒𝕝𝕜𝕤♡
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<<Farm!Elllie Williams x Fem!Reader>>
Sinopsis: Just a regular night at you farm house, but recently you've been having nightmares. Luckily, you have your girl right besides you to let you know you are safe.
Warning: just fluffy and soft Ellie with a big heart.
"Tess!" You screamed, opening your eyes suddenly.
Your breathing accelerated and your heart beating in your chest, ~for a moment you felt like it was going to come out~.
You sat up on the bed and placed a hand on your chest, while the other one rested on the mattress to help you maintain your balance.
Warm tears began to run down your cheeks just by remembering the nightmare you had had.
Your daughter, your baby, your little world, in the middle of a horde of infected, completely alone and helpless as she screamed for you, and you couldn't do anything to help her.
You had found her one day when you were out hunting. She was wrapped in a blanket next to a stuffed rabbit, completely asleep. There was a note on top of the stuffed animal.
"She's only 2 months old. Please take care of her before it's too late for her as it is for us."
The first time you held her in your arms, you felt as if that baby had automatically taken over a piece of your heart. She opened her eyes and you fell in love with the little one.
You decided to name her after your mother, Joel's smuggling partner who died more than 6 years ago. You loved your mother, and losing her was like losing a part of you. And as you held the little girl in your arms, It was like finding that lost part again.
That was 6 months ago.
You heard someone calling your name next to you in bed and you finally snapped out of your thoughts to turn your head, meeting your lover.
"I'm sorry. Did I wake you up?" You asked Ellie in a whisper.
The green-eyed sat up in bed and cupped your wet cheek.
"The dreams again?" She asked you and you nodded.
"I'm sorry." You said wiping away tears.
"You don't have to apologize for anything, love." She assured you.
You had met Ellie when your mother and Joel were assigned on taking her to the Firefly's base, so they could make her the cure for humanity. That same trip was the one on which your mother died, and the rest is history.
You turned your head to see the crib your daughter was resting in peacefully, two meters away from the bed you and Ellie were on.
You slowly got out of bed and walked towards your baby. Tess was curled up in a ball, a pacifier between her lips that she sucked freely, and the same stuffed rabbit that you had found her with, in her arms.
You were hypnotized watching her, her blonde hair reminded you of your mother, and you smiled slightly when you saw her so healthy and calm, without any worries going through her little head.
A pair of arms were wrapped around your waist, and Ellie's chin rested on your left shoulder. You closed your eyes and enjoyed the small moment.
Those simple gestures from Ellie were what made you fall in love with her. She knew exactly how to make yourself feel safe with a single action.
"I'm really sorry I woke you up." You said and Ellie gave you a kiss on the shoulder.
"It's okay, don't worry." She whispered and you stroked her arms. "I love you, you know that?"
"Yes. You remind me of that every day." You said with a smile. You turned your head and met her beautiful green eyes. "And I like to remind you that I love you much more."
"Don't start a fight you won't win." Ellie said and you both shared a small laugh before turning their eyes to the little girl in the crib. "I love you both, with everything I have." She said and you felt your heart warm.
"And we love you." You assured her.
"I know." Ellie's hands roamed your waist slowly and then positioned themselves on either side of you before guiding you back to the bed. "We have to rest." She dropped you onto the mattress and positioned herself next to you to cup your face.
"I hate those nightmares." You said bitterly.
"Everything is fine. Nothing will happen to Tess or you, I will make sure of that." She told you completely seriously.
You approached her face and left a sweet kiss on her lips, then settled into the crook of her neck and inhaled her aroma, which always brought you calm.
Little by little your breathing became slower and slower to the point that your eyelids became so heavy that you closed them and fell into a deep sleep, while the arms of the love of your life wrapped around you, keeping you warm and safe.
♡♡♡
The next morning, you woke up to the little girl crying. In the night you had moved and ended up with your back against Ellie's chest.
You opened your eyes trying to get used to the sunlight and yawned. Ellie's arms pulled you tighter against her and her breath on your neck gave you goosebumps.
"Love." You called her without getting any response. "Honey, Tess has to eat." You said and this time you heard a small whimper from your girlfriend.
Ellis slowly got up and stretched before getting out of bed.
"I got it." She said and walked slowly to the crib. When she reached it she put her hands on the bars and smiled at the little girl inside. "Good morning, princess." She greeted her, causing the crying to subside. The green-eyed girl took Tess into her arms and gave her a few kisses on her cheeks, making her laugh. "We'll go have breakfast and let mommy take a hot shower." Ellie said and then looked at you with a smile. "Say bye to mommy, Tess."
The little girl looked at you with her big eyes and you smiled at her, while she looked at you and let out a shout of joy, making you laugh.
Ellie left with Tess in her arms, leaving you alone. You went to the bathroom and took your time in the hot water, relaxing your tense muscles and simply enjoying the moment alone, knowing that your girls were waiting for you in the kitchen.
You dried yourself and when your hair was damp but not dripping, you went back to the room. You stole a light blue shirt from Ellie and put on some baggy gray pants.
When you went down to the kitchen you found a scene straight out of a movie. Ellie with the frying pan in her right hand, while holding the little blonde with her left arm.
She was dancing back and forth to the music that came from the record player, while Tess watched attentively as the green-eyed flipped the pancake, and the little one ended up clapping and laughing.
"I think she really likes watching you cook." You said walking closer.
They both turned their heads. Tess extended her arms asking you to pick her up, and Ellie passed her to you without a problem.
"We were already missing you." Your girlfriend said, turning back to continue cooking the pancakes.
You smiled and looked at your daughter who was now touching your left cheek with her hand. You could feel her hand was somewhat drooling, meaning she had put it in her mouth, and you laughed.
"Do you like watching mama cook, baby?" You asked and Tess laughed.
"Of course she likes to watch me cook. I'm quite a show." Ellie responded.
"You have a very cocky mother." You said softly towards the baby, but loud enough for the auburn-haired to hear.
"Hey!" She said turning around again and you just laughed and took Tess to the dining room table.
A few minutes later, Ellie appeared in the dining room with a plate of stacked pancakes, a jug of orange juice, and Tess's bottle. She left everything on the table and sat next to you.
"I see you woke up feeling like pampering." You said amused.
"All for my girls." She said the same way. You sat Tess on your lap and took the lid off the bottle full of warm milk to start feeding her.
Tess's little hands grabbed the bottle over yours and she drank the milk slowly and peacefully.
Ellie decided that today she wanted to spoil you completely. After last night's altercation, the aurbun-haired wanted you to clear your head and know that you were not alone.
She began to cut pieces of pancakes and poked one with her fork to bring it closer to your mouth. You smiled at her and opened wide so Ellie could start feeding you.
As you chewed, a drop of honey slipped across your lips and ran slowly down your chin. Ellie ran her thumb over the area, looking at you with love eyes.
You knew in that moment that you didn't want to be anywhere else but there. Not because you were surrounded by nature, animals and music. But because you were with the two people who made you the happiest, and you would have them forever.
C: hey guys! Carm here. Just wanted to let you know some things. First of all, english is not my first language so im really sorry if smt is not written correctly. Second, I'm not some Allan Poe haha. I'm just doing this for fun, ~as i think most poeple are~, so please be kind because we are here to have a great time. And third, if you have any ideas or recommendations im always open to hear you guys.
Rememeber to stay hydrated, sleep well ~with Ellie~, watch an episode of your fav tv show, and masturbate to get to know your body.
XOXO
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kneelingshadowsalome · 7 months
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Picture credit: xbruised_peachx on Twitter
Sorry but I’m on my young recruit König & old colonel König brainrot again
CW: More polyamory headcanons with 2 Königs. Healthy relationship with old König and toxic relationship with young König, possessive behaviour, jealousy, NSFW 18+ only
The way he greets you when he comes back is so sweet you almost melt right there on the doorstep. He cups your face with both hands, gives you the most tender kiss known to mankind, and envelops you in a soul-warming hug. The love of your life sighs deeply as he holds you; his sweet, adorable wife. The Colonel may be a little tired but he's also extremely happy to be home again.
Colonel König, the older, calmer version of König is everything a woman could want. You married him early because he charmed you right off your feet.
You ride him on the first night because you simply want to show how much you've missed him. Colonel König never objects to you taking the reins every now and then. You see it from his eyes that he’s in seventh heaven whenever you bounce on his cock. He’s just happy to see you take your pleasure from him. He’s the luckiest man on earth because his needy young wife never gets enough of him – it strokes his ego that someone like you wants someone like him.
He always puts his things where they belong and takes a shower before walking into the living room and falling on the sofa with another deep sigh. He looks like he just fought an entire war by himself. When you go to make some dinner, he bounces back up and offers to help. You have to convince him that he can rest while you prepare some food. When you return with the meal, the tv is on but the Colonel is snoring softly on the couch.
He praises you and the meal, and you both talk about your days (or weeks). It calms your nerves just to talk with him. Colonel König is cultured and mature and you can talk to him about politics or the squirrels in your garden or some new documentary you've watched. He can hold any conversation.
He's illegally hot with his deep voice and loving stare, not to mention the thick muscles covered by a healthy layer of fat. You pride yourself on giving him some of that by feeding him so well. He already has a few laugh lines at the corner of his eyes – you pride yourself on giving those to him, too.
In the morning he’s much more vigorous. A good night's rest does wonders to any man, and König wakes up to cuddle you with a good, hard, thick erection. If you’re still sleepy, he will go down on you – he loves it when you’re too tired and warm and pleased to fight him.
He edges you for at least an hour: now it’s his turn to show how much he has missed you and how much he appreciates it that he has a cozy, beautiful home and a lovely, beautiful wife to return to. He’s sure he won the lottery with you, and you’re sure you’ve been blessed with the most attentive gentleman on earth. You feel like floating before you even get to the breakfast table.
Colonel König brings you small gifts and expensive flowers everytime he comes home, and takes you on a vacation to a new, exciting place every chance he can get, which is multiple times a year. You never have to ask for anything because he already got it for you.
You never have to fear you’re too much, or too moody, too this or too that: König appreciates you just the way you are and takes your fits and breakdowns and insecurities and PMS struggles like a champ. He stays calm during any storm and you can always trust him with all your troubles. You stopped apologizing for yourself an aeon ago because you know König doesn’t want to hear it: he only wants to comfort and console you when life has been hard on you. He will do anything to make it better, and if he can’t make it better, he will hold you long and fast until you smile again.
He takes such good care of you that you cried into his chest hair about it once. König only caressed you and said you deserve all of it and more. You could hear the calm, content smile on his lips while you were ugly crying about him being too good for you and spoiling you to bits.
When you asked if there’s anything you can do to return the many favors he’s given you, his face turned super smug before he suggested that you could always blow him. That’s probably the most obscene thing you've ever heard him say, which is why your face was all flushed when you travelled down to suck his already hard cock.
If only he didn’t have to repair the damage left behind by his younger version, you two would be the happiest couple this world has ever seen. Life would be peaceful and his home would stay nice and clean if the young, horny recruit had never walked into your life. He would have more energy and he could go back to work with a peaceful mind if it weren’t for this boy who has yet to learn how to be a man. A boy he couldn't deny you because you must always have everything you want; it's a law he lives by. You saved him from himself, and he will see you happy no matter what.
For some reason a troubled, violent young pup who shows a woman he loves them by bullying and fucking them to a quivering heap is what makes you happy at this point in life. Perhaps it's only a bonus that the rookie takes the blunt of your libido... otherwise he might be in trouble with his younger wife.
It’s just that the Colonel knows he can’t satisfy all your needs. You have a dark side, which he appreciates, and he thinks he’s being a good man when he allows this to happen. He's a good man, both to you and to the rookie who is the cockiest and also the most deranged, damaged little creature he has ever seen.
He tries his best to carve a man out of this poor, traumatized young bastard. He tries his best to give you the opportunity to live your life to the full by having two men who absolutely and utterly worship you... in their own ways.
Because when Young Recruit König comes home?
He’s not tired at all. He’s just excited and pent-up from being away from you for so long. He greets you by lifting you into a bone-crushing hug, sets you down when you whimper, and buries his face into your neck. You never get a kiss on the lips or a peck on the cheek: young König gives you a long, bruising love bite on your neck while you squirm and whine in his hold. He's something of a sadist when he only laughs and asks, “How has my sweet little Muschi* been...?” *Muschi means pussy in German :(
He doesn’t offer to help, he just throws his bags on the floor and asks what’s for dinner. If you have it ready, he nuzzles his face into your neck again and says how much he loves you, how perfect you are, and how he’s going to show how much he missed you after he's had a taste of your delicious cookings.
You watch how he eats almost all of it, a meal meant for an entire family. Colonel König eats like a horse, too, but he’s modest compared to our young rookie who goes to the gym in addition to his hectic job and probably burns 4000 calories per day just by daydreaming of filthy scenarios with you.
Don’t even think about riding him slowly into the sunset. Young König takes you while you’re on your knees, your ass and pussy exposed to his hungry gaze and hard cock. It borders on humiliating sometimes, the way he treats you. You grab for support from the sheets, knowing that it’s useless.
You’re in luck if you happen to cum, because the first round is just him using his little muschi, the tight, sweet hole he’s missed so much. He sounds like an animal until he cums, then kisses you all over when he’s done. You both sound like you're about to cry as he gives you hot, fond smooches where it tickles the most, getting some kind of sick satisfaction from the way you squirm and shudder in his hold again.
Round two is much more gentle and König is way more attentive, now focusing solely on you. Or at least on how you look under him, how desperate and wet your eyes get, how your tits bounce when he makes love to you. Well, you wouldn’t say that the younger version of König even knows how to make love – the old Colonel has tried to teach him, but he seems to get very pissed at anyone telling him what to do and how to do it. Plus he knows he can give you what the old man can or will not: a rough fucking that leaves you breathless, helpless and very much in love.
Because even if the first time is pure madness, the sessions that follow are made of intense adoration. König is obsessed with you and your desperate moans, your tight, wet cunt, the way he can make you cum three or four or even five times a day. He’s not the most gentle, attentive guy but he will do anything in his power to make you shiver, shake, beg, and clench. While Colonel tries to savour you nice and slow, the younger recruit lives for extremes. Sometimes it feels like he’s trying to drive you (or himself) mad.
The sheets have to be changed on the third day of his leave, and there’s not a surface in your house he hasn’t bullied you on or against. After a few days of fucking and living on takeaway food (König won’t let you from his sights for one minute), the young recruit finally calms down and agrees to watch some movies with you. You even get him to do some chores.
He won't help you in the garden like Colonel König because he's interested in the most dangerous, illegal or unnecessary jobs in the house, such as: can he fix the weather vane while balancing on a slippery roof, or would it be any fun if he did some DIY electrical work by himself. But he will help you with your computer, fix you some weed and turn a cooking session into a play fight that ends with you both on the kitchen floor and König sampling you instead of the sauce you tried to offer him.
This young rookie comes home with a wine bottle or some new sexy lingerie for you to wear (and him to tear right off). One day he comes home with a kitten, a scared little orange tabby, and asks if you like it while an evil grin spreads on his face. The poor thing tries to scratch and claw König but he has his gloves on, and when it gets released to your apartment, it runs under the sofa and won't come out, not before König comes up with a solution that involves some tuna. You're 100% sure he either stole that kitten or found it abandoned somewhere.
König leaves you in the good care of his older version, knowing that the aftercare he provided barely counts as aftercare because it’s filled with manic kisses and hugs that hardly allow you to breathe. The things he mutters in your ear when he holds you are usually about you being the best pussy he’s ever had, or about would you like it if he killed the old fart.
The cat turns out to be very vocal and cuddly but it also destroys your curtains and the Colonel's side of the bed. It grows up to be a violent bird hunting machine and an entire menace that, perhaps to no one's surprise, reminds you of your young lover.
Conversations with König mainly include him mansplaining things to you. He boasts a lot and you get the feeling he's actually very insecure under all that brash cockiness. But whenever you try to work on that with him, he soon gets annoyed, frustrated, or horny. Any attention is both poison and elixir for this man.
When you start to cry from him being so intense with you and mean to the man you love (the man who allows this young rookie to eat his food, fuck his wife and practically live in the house he bought with hard work) he says it’s only because he knows you’re not happy with him, not really.
But he can make you happy. He has money too. He can give you everything you want, too. And didn’t he just make you cum twice with his tongue and cock? Can the old man do that, eh? What else do you need? What else could you even ask for?
You have to make your calls and texts to the Colonel in secret even if your arrangement is known to all parties involved. It’s just that the young recruit becomes even more crazy and possessive in bed if he sees or hears you talking to his rival. You get the sense that he's not just crazy and self-centered: he's actually so desperately in love with you that he can't take the reminder that you're someone else's wife.
You tried to live together once, but it ended in both of your lovers in the hospital and you crying next to their beds. They made an uneasy truce after that, and agreed that they should take turns with you.
They mainly talk to each other through you nowadays. The "talking" mainly consist of threats which you never deliver.
Colonel König says he’ll snap the young prick’s neck if he ever hurts you in any way, your body or your feelings. You never say to him that the damage is already done – well, perhaps he hasn't hurt your body, which is sore from all the love, yes, but never abused. But he has hurt your feelings many times by being so callous, intimidating, and reckless.
Your nervous system is constantly on high alert with the young recruit who fantasizes very openly and cruelly about all the things he’d like to do to the Colonel (such as "if he tries to show me how to fuck this sweet Muschi again, I will fuck him to his grave with his own dick" or "I have a bullet with your lover's name on it. Have you ever held a gun, kleiner Schatz? Would you like me to show you how to load a rifle?")
When you remind him that you’re the Colonel’s wife, and won’t listen to such violent, stupid nonsense, the young recruit smiles with another devilish grin and says you needn’t worry: you wouldn’t be a widow for long. He would propose to you once the funeral is over and done with. Perhaps he’ll propose at the funeral. Would you like that…? Would it make you wet?
It's the only time you actually slapped him, and it only got him hard. When you were shocked about that too, he asked why do you think men go to the army in the first place, and urged you to slap the Colonel too and see what it does to him.
What you find a bit funny though is how this entitled young man seems to think about the Colonel everytime he’s inside you. He always brags about how he fucks you better than him, how he knows you prefer his mouth over the old man’s. He knows his cock is bigger too: he compared once when they were having a piss outside. He also knows you should make babies with him: they would be very healthy. Surely you’d choose him over the old Colonel if it came to breeding you? If you ever want children, you only need to ask...
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hee0soo · 1 month
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Bumps and Paws
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Pairing — ChoiSanxafab!Reader
Summary — A pregnancy brings many unknown things with itself but what you didn't expect was Byeol becoming this attached...
Genre — fluff, established Realationship, Idol!Au
Warnings — pregnancy, mentions of nausea
Wordcount — 1.2k
Rating — pg-13
Disclaimer: this fic is written and copyrighted by ©hee0soo on tumblr. do not rewrite or repost on any other plattforms without my permission.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED!
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When you had first met San all those years ago, you hadn't thought much about the future. Still in university and working 2 jobs on the side were enough to keep your mind from wandering that far and going on dates was certainly nothing you wanted to think about while exam season was right around the corner!
You weren't prepared for the bright smiles and cheeky winks the small boy getting coffee for what seemed like an army threw at you and you certainly weren't prepared for being asked out on a hectic day during rush hour that had you stammering a shocked, "Yes?" and the little skip in the boys step as he left the café you worked at only to realize that he didn't have a way to contact you and run back in in panic.
If you were to be honest with yourself, the awkward and still somehow charming boy had managed to break through the chains you had locked your heart with in the span of mere seconds that day. You weren't one to  believe in love at the first sight but something that day made you think that maybe it wasn't entirely impossible...
It wasn't always easy. Between his admitting to being a trainee at a small label, long nights of studying, working and barely being able to see each other with his hectic schedule once his group made it's debut and keeping everything a secret, there had been times where you thought letting him go would be for the best. Times where you had told him to move on even if it broke your heart and times where he had looked at you, eyes swimming with tears, telling you that he didn't want to move on without you.
But now, years later, you were settled down. A apartment you shared with the man who had almost grown twice in size compared to back then, a cuddly cat that seemed to love you more then it's original owner, and a baby on the way!
Not what you had dared to think about all those years ago.
While you were ecstatic upon finding out about the little peanut growing inside of you, now, almost 6 months in you were ready to smack your boyfriend for doing this to you! Swollen feet, nausea and cravings that sometimes scared you were only some of the struggles you faced as of now. And that at a state where you still were able to move without do many difficulties.
However the thing that caused you the most stress was the amount of times you had to pee!
Finding a position on your couch that was 100% comfortable proved to be nearly impossible with the little bean seemingly tap dancing on your bladder and sending you on your way to the bathroom only to repeat the process not to long after again.
San found the whole thing incredibly amusing. The pout he received at the hushed giggles causing a flood of kisses to be peppered over your face as you sat there in the living room, dressed in his shirt that seemed much to big even with the bump and a pair of sweatpants that was also his. The TV being completely forgotten as you pretend glared at your bare belly and the cat that had it's nose resting on it. Shirt tucked up and secured under your boobs do make sure it didn't drop while the feline purred against your skin.
"You know, I can already tell that the two of you will be a menace to society if you keep making me pee!" you huffed, hand stroking over Byeols head gently.
San snorted to himself. He had watched and listened for a while from his place next to you while your body melted against his.
Byeol let out a meow as if she disagreed with the statement wholeheartedly. She closed her eyes, purrs vibrating against your belly and enjoying the pets you gave her.
The cat had become somewhat of a shadow ever since you got pregnant I following you around wherever you went. Beit the kitchen where she always managed to convince you do give her a treat, the bed where she usually prefered the presence of your boyfriend or the bathroom where she meowed so loud in front of the door until you caved and let her inside.
You swore that you could see a proud gleam in the animals eyes and that it wasn't just something you imagined!
No matter where you went, Byeol was there too.
Sanfound the new behavior more then hilarious, cooing over his girl guarding his girl. At least until the feline had chosen to turn on him, hissing and batting the offending hand of his away from your / her/ bump. It wasn't serious. Byeol never actively using her claws or teeth to nibble on his hand, but the shock on San's face was more then enough to produce an evil cackle from you.
Her newest antic however you didn't know what do think of. On one side it was cute to see the cat drying to communicate with the peanut growing inside you, on the other hand you really didn't appreciate having your bladder kicked and be played with!
And that's what was happening daily ever since Byeol had understood that whatever had changed in you could kick. It was almost like a game of tag, only that neither the baby nor the cat had any intentions of moving away. Starting with the babys food kicking outwards to be seen from the outside. The poor cat had been so startled that she had fallen of the couch in shock. However once Byeol had gotten used to the movement of your belly, it a nickly developed into said game.
And so you found yourself in your current predicament. Byeol tapping against your stomach with her paw, ce moment of silence, and then a kick from the baby. The two could play like this forever it felt like. At least until a particular hard kickor punch send you running to the bathroom!
"Come on, it's cute! Byeol-ah is just being a good big sister to the little bean. Wantingtoget to know her and play," San chuckled against the side of your head, his hand playing with the strap of your top. "And you can't tell me that you don't think the same."
You hummed quietly. "But do they have to do it on my bladder? I'm way to comfy to get up now..." Scratching Byeols ear you scrunched your nose.
San ever the loving boyfriend kissed your temple. "But where would be the fun in that?"
He leaned over to get closer to your growing belly, his finger tapping against where he had just seen a movement of the skin only to receive an enthusiastic punch as an answer.
You smiled softly.
"Are you being mean to your mommy? Not letting her restin peace, but playing with your sister?" He mumbled against the bump.
A kick from the baby.
A kiss from the proud baby daddy.
And a tap against San's head from Byeol.
"Yah! Byeol-ah! That's my bump! Let me talk to my baby!" San complained,  faking insult.
Byeol looked unimpressed and hit him again on the head before purring loudly to rub her head against your stomach.
"I don't think she agrees on that, Sannie."
Sulking he came back up. His mouth suddenly being against yours in a loving kiss.
"I don't care, you and the bean are mine!"
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