#anyway hee hoo i love my kids!!!

[sweet-beezus]

Then the last of the hoard of doodles

#sham's art #shamsbabs #penna #isaac #mandorian #iliana #starlit midnight #winnifred wolf #winnie wolf #glamrock winnifred #glamrock winnie #my brain's scattered to the four winds at this point #i keep bouncing between silly thoughts all the time it's such a treat #anyway hee hoo i love my kids!!! #gargoyles oc #kingdom hearts oc #fnaf oc #mlp oc #digital doodles #tag edit: i went thru a design phase #so i made some fakemons based on some friend given headcanons #sorta redesigned an old fnaf oc #and an mlp oc as well #then there's a guy i played in a short rpg #most embarrassing man to exist tbh #and then a few kiddo treats #mandorian is a kermit stan fr fr

[fractualized]

Hoo boy. TMWSL #11 dropped a bomb today. Or a potential bomb? There's still one issue to go.

I'll just get into it.

(big ol' spoilers and SO MANY explosions)

We open with Sewer Rat Joker in the middle of kidnapping several Gothamites.

I'm not sure about that guy on the left, but the lil goon on the right is freaking Albert, the dying kid from the hospital, just… tagging along? I love it.

The janitor is loaded into a van with a few others, and "a few blocks away"…

LA Joker's got a bun now!

That is not Mr. Waffles holding an umbrella to protect the bun from the rain. Waffles is elsewhere on his own special task. At first it's like, aw, I'd like Waffles to be attending to the boss like this. But, uh, we'll learn soon it's actually better that Waffles is otherwise occupied.

Anyway, this Joker has been looking and looking and looking for his counterpart, who's managed to elude capture even while while most of his henchmen have been taken out. And this failure is not looking good on LA Joker, who is very frustrated!

It's so funny that the man they're looking for is nearby in an unmarked van. So maybe the goon who Joker threatened actually deserves it when Joker tells the others to throw him off a bridge. 😬

Joker goes back into the warehouse where Killer Moth is watching TV.

Come on, he's just putting on a show!

Before we find out what Sewer Rat Joker is up to, we cut to Manhunter investigating the van he was using. But he, his crew, and his captives are gone. Ravager is there with information from Jason.

Wait wait wait. Is… Is Jason gone because of the Gotham War thing? Are these supposed to be happening at the same time?? I know Knight Terrors indicated that the events in Batman happen around the same time, but this issue has to take place while Bruce is asleep for two months post Knight Terrors. Right? The goings-on in TMWSL couldn't have been paused for that long. It also doesn't make any goddamn sense, because in Gotham War Selina has supposedly enlisted like 95% of the henchmen, and Jason is acting like he has no clue what's going on with Joker, and nobody is talking about all this Joker-related stuff going on. Like obviously this was never going to end with Jason killing Joker, so I was just assuming Gotham War happens after TMWSL with Jason still on the hunt, but... Good lord, Jason better show up in #12, or I'm going to lose my freakin' mind.

We get a panel showing that Mr. Waffles is watching the two women before we cut to midtown.

Now you think, oh, Sewer Rat Joker is still clothed and not naked, so what's his plan? But then he unleashes a hoard of goons and mid-level rogues on the cops, and you realize this is actually LA Joker, suddenly dressed down in a very similar way to Sewer Rat Joker. I assumed this was for some sort of "Shoot him!" // "No, shoot him!" situation later, but… you'll see.

Hee hee, Moth is using his wings to protect himself from the rain and it looks so cute.

Aw, Joker. :( Don't be so mean to the henchmen. At least it wasn't Waffles.

We don't have to wonder what the purpose of the mess is, because back at the warehouse:

Distraction action! This is not a good issue for henchmen, I gotta tell ya.

Uh… sure, Albert. Good guys.

Also, regarding the newcast, is Joker somewhat diminished "in recent years"?? Joker War wasn't that long ago, even less long ago in-universe, I think. Maybe it just means more rogues are stepping up as larger figures, like Bane and Scarecrow, and I guess Failsafe the angsty robot since if that happened before Knight Terrors, then he's a known quantity here.

Meanwhile, the reportedly naked Joker is not so naked.

I'll never not enjoy confused conversations.

Killer Moth gets a report that the warehouse is radio silent, and that someone spotted the imposter in Chinatown at a hardware store. And then…

See, if Mr. Waffles had been hanging with Joker, he might be dead! For real this time!

This shit is why most henchmen must work with Joker because of obsessive reasons, not for money.

Joker and Moth's amazing escape is not very triumphant.

As they hurtle to the ground, we check back in with Manhunter at the warehouse.

Sewer Rat Joker has also done a costume change! Presumably it's part of him retaking his place as the Rightful Joker. So if there's not going to be outfit confusion, I suppose the other Joker just changed for… comfort?

But there is still confusion for Manhunter, who refers to events in Los Angeles, but if course this Joker says he hasn't been there in a long time.

Albert's parents really should have explained to him who the Joker is.

So LA Joker has forced Killer Moth to walk with him to Chinatown to pick up on the imposter's trail, and they meet up with their remaining henchmen. "Remaining" because of all the ones that died at the train wreck, and some other casualties. They also give Joker the bad news that, like Clayface, basically all the villains that were helping him (Zsasz, Firefly, KGBeast, etc) took off because of how badly this search is going. But Joker will press on! He orders the henchmen into the hardware store to get the imposter.

At least we're all having fun heading toward the finale!

Back at the warehouse standoff, Manhunter has a realization.

Joker has definitely murdered pizza boys. Also, aw, he misses Jason. :( Sadly, Jason isn't who shows up to Manhunter's rescue.

Seriously, if Gotham War is the reason Jason isn't here, and he's not present to close this title out, I'm going to be so annoyed. No shade on Ravager and Manhunter, but we started with Jason. This should finish with Jason. Jason helping Selina for nonsensical reasons is a terrible reason for him to not be here hunting the guy he's been obsessed with for 10 issues.

Sigh. Anyway, Joker sics some poor toxin'd doppelgangers on the women before he escapes with Albert.

Buzzing? THAT'S THE SECRET WORD!

Alright, because of the spy adventure, Mr. Waffles cut it a little close this time, but look at the bright side. Now he meets up with the real deal at last!

Ooh, more hints of the real story, as Waffles lore, heck yeah. The henchman was Mr. Waffles' buddy? Was it just like the "flashback" in the last issue, or different?

Wait, what? WHAT? WHAAAAAAAAAAAOkay okay okay okay. That's a big dang reveal, but there's still one issue left. Can't let the instinct to trust our beloved Mr. Waffles toss aside the options for the final issue:

1) This is all true. Sewer Rat Joker has actually been the imposter all the long, despite his elaborate dream with Batman making that seem silly. EXCEPT. John Keyser not knowing that Batman is Bruce Wayne would be an explanation for why he treated them as two separate people in the dream. Even though there was still an obvious link by putting Bruce in the TKJ outfit and having him behave erratically. Regardless, maybe Keyser really is that deep in. (Though if Joker used the brainwashing technology revealed in Task Force X, I think Keyser would know about Bruce Wayne, putting the explanation back at Weird Dream Thing.)

2) Waffles is straight-up lying to save his own life from a pissed off boss. The reason he's so buddy-buddy with LA Joker is because they were buddies before the transformation.

3) Waffles is being truthful, except something happened during the creation of the second Joker that caused John and Joker to switch places, and Waffles just doesn't realize it.

And I'm hoping #2 or #3 is correct. LA Joker had some fun moments (particularly his relationship with Waffles), but I'm definitely more attached to the underdog, the Joker who had that great nightmare and whose inner thoughts we've been privy to. I wasn't at all expecting Joker to have drastic character development or a heel-face turn or the like, but if it turns out that all those vulnerable moments treating Joker as a three-dimensional character instead of a flat, only-evil-and-nothing-but villain are not about him but some delusional henchman… Hrm. HRM. I know it's gonna bug me. It's gonna bug me a lot.

Whatever happens, I'm just hoping Rosenberg sticks the landing.

Oh, and as a side note, unless there was another henchman involved in this mysterious gas experiment, none of this appears to explain who the Joker appearing in Batman Inc was. Theoretically that could've been LA Joker having some fun on the side when he was away, but there's been nothing in the text saying so. I'm getting the strong feeling that, with how unconcerned DC has been with establishing a clear timeline for their intersecting titles, we're never going to get an answer. Or they'll somehow blame the damn omniverse.

#the man who stopped laughing #joker #spoilers #my jibber-jabber

[coy-lee]

Cheater, Cheater

@afloofwithmultipleinterests and I had a mIGHTY NEEEED.

And someone in my ask box stirred it up lol. You know who you are >:3

Anyway, there was a need to write some muy fluffy content involving a jester and a spambot. So if you're into that kind of content, stop on by and take a look.

Description: Spamton and Jevil do battle quite often. Spamton feels like Jevil is hiding the secret to freedom in that cell of his. Jevil knows better than that and would rather keep Spamton from finding out the no such secret exists. So, they duke it out, both wanting to win for their own reasons. This time, though, Jevil is a bit worried about how good Spamton has gotten at fighting him...so he takes the battle in a different direction. A very fun direction.

Cheater, Cheater

He was back at the gate. He'd have to beat him eventually, right? Right! He'd have to... He had to. Spamton didn't need the key. Due to his broken nature, he could glitch right through the invisible door and straight into the void Jevil called home. He never knew what to expect when entering the jester's domain. The decor changed quite often, although it was always themed around the circus.

The stairwell above echoed with the sound of Spamton's heels tapping against the hard floor as he walked near the bars. The inside was just as dark as always, making chills go down Spamton's spine. He couldn't chicken out now no matter what. Before Spamton could glitch through the door, the imp materialized himself from the shadows, bells jingling behind him. 

"BOO HOO, BOO HOO, UEE HEE HEE! SO LONELY, SO LONELY I BE.. BUT LO, THREE VISI-" Jevil paused as he recognized Spamton almost instantly. "OH- ITS NOT A RESET, RESET! WHAT A WONDERFUL SURPRIZE!" The jester exclaimed in an illusionary tone of jubilation. "OH COME OUT, COME OUT! LET YOURSELF OUTSIDE, SPAMMY! WHAT FUN WE'LL HAVE, HAVE!"

Spamton groaned, already tired of the clown's antics. A small door appeared within the wall of bars before him. Jevil seemingly created it as a gag. Spamton walked through the door, only to step into a clown-themed tea room, but instead of there being a teapot, a gallon of carbonated 'Clown-Juice' sat in the middle of the table. There were various other jester themed decorations around the room, some that made sense... and some that didn't. Jevil proceeded to turn the chairs around, their backs against the table. 

"HERE! I EVEN PUSHED UP YOUR SEAT FOR YA!"

 The imp sat down in one of the chairs, holding up a spades teacup and slurping his drink as loudly as he could. 

"I'M NOT A [[kids 6 and under]]! AND YOU'RE [[insane deal]] IF Y OU THINK I'LL [[one big gulp!]] ANY 0F TH4T [[WHOOPY JUICE!!!]]" Spamton shouted, trying to establish some ounce of dominance in the clown's realm. He had been here many times before. Even though it wasn't his pocket of unreality, Spamton was now quite familiar with the place... or at least used to expecting the unexpected.  "Y0U KNOW DAMN WELL WHY I [[cruising around town]] DOWN HERE AND 1T ISN'T FOR A [[dinner for two]]."

Jevil went oddly quiet, however his smile widened. The table disappeared, and Jevil began to chug from the teacup he had in his gloved hand. After he was done he tossed the glass behind him, and it exploded similarly to how a certain prissy and popular queen's glass would back in Spamton's dark world. 

"ENLIGHTEN ME, ENLIGHTEN ME!" Jevil started, a smirk replacing his usual cold smile. "IS IT TO PLAY A CARD GAME? OH! OR A GAME OF TAG? OR- OH! I KNOW! YOU WANNA TELL JOKES, JOKES!? OH I LOVE JOKES, AND LAUGHING! I BET IT'S BEEN AWHILE SINCE YOU'VE LAUGHED, RIGHT?" Jevil's word vomit was soon cut off by Spamton who was taken aback by that last query.

"I'LL HAVE YO U KNOW THAT I [[unintelligible laughter]] PLENTY, ESPECIALLY AFTER I [[GAME OVER]] YOU [[juggalo]]!" Spamton countered, gritting his teeth. Admittedly, he was starting to feel the adrenaline rush and the nervousness right behind it. He wouldn't lose again. He WOULDN'T, but doubt was fluttering in his stomach. He could never tell what was going on in Jevil's mind. As an Addison, Spamton was used to predicting people's habits, wants and needs, but Jevil was a severe outlier, and that drove the salesman nuts.

"UEE HEE HEE!" His laugh was hollow, but imitated glee. "SO ITS THE OLD NUMBER'S GAME YOU WANT!" The clown tapped a gloved finger to his chin a moment in genuine thought, before snapping his tail similarly to fingers. He smiled widely at Spamton, his eyes sparkling with an unknown intent. "IF YOU INSIST... I'LL PLAY THAT GAME! BUT I WONT GO EASY ON YOU PINNOCHIO, CHIO~" 

Jevil turned Into his devilsknive, cracking the ground open to where he and Spamton would fall through into the endless void of space. It was the perfect place to battle... an empty canvas of freedom.

"AAYEGUFFFAH! [[$!?!]] WOULD IT [[killed]] YOU TO M4KE IT A SOFTER LANDING? [[JIMINY CHRISTMAS]]" Spamton exclaimed as he slowly got up, rubbing his bottom to relieve the pain from the sudden fall. He quickly shook it off. He had a fight to win. He couldn't let a little surprise like that throw him off. That was Jevil's whole shtick. Surprises. He huffed, getting himself ready for anything.

"BETTER BE QUICK ON YOUR TOES, TOES!" Jevil teased before healing Spamton up with magic for a fairly unfair battle, touching his shoulder to transfer the magic to his HP. "WHO KNOWS, KNOWS... MAYBE YOU'LL OUTSMART ME FOR A CHANGE!" Jevil vaguely encouraged, making spamton feel a little more hopeful... for only a few seconds. "EMPHASIS ON MAYBE." The puppet would scowl at the Imp if he could. Jevil disappeared, reappearing way across from Spamton, dancing and putting on a stage show for the lone audience member. "YOU CAN HAVE THE FIRST MOVE, MOVE!"

"OOOOH NONONO. I'M NOT F4LLING FOR   THAT [[tips and tricks]]. IF I GO FIRST YOU'LL [[uno reverse]] ME. [[Ladies first]], I INSIST," Spamton replied with a devilish grin of his own.

"OKIE DOKIE~ IF YOU INSIST THAT YOU INSIST!" Jevil shrugged, summoning his cliche card-deck bullets, shooting them in various patterns at Spamton, the puppet dodging them effortlessly by jumping, and defying gravity. He had gotten better since the last thousand attempts at trying to beat Jevil... To say the least, the imp was impressed. However, Jevil couldn't let that puppet find out the truth.  That's honestly what made the clown refuse to let Spamton win... It was the puppet's motivation that scared the jester. That was why Jevil needed to win no matter what, or else... Spamton would lose that spark he himself lost so long ago.

The carousel appeared, however it was a bit different. The top and lower border were see-sawing while it spun around, and around. Jevil shot his arms out straight in a T-Pose, summoning various rocking animals with his chaotic magic as they followed along to the beat of the carousel. ... However, despite that fact, Spamton was keeping up, and only got hit once. This was making Jevil kind of nervous..

The nervousness Spamton was feeling before began to wane as he was off to the best start he'd ever had. The carousel was one of the more difficult moves for Spamton to dodge, so this success was a promising sign. So long as Jevil stayed on his script of magical acts, the puppet had a chance.

"IS THAT THE [[Best in the business!]] 

Y OU'VE GOT, [[FOOL]]!? AHEAHEAHEA!" Spamton summoned a phone and spun it in the air like a lasso before flinging it directly at Jevil. The jester shot up into the air to avoid the attack only for the ringing coming from the phone to echo and bounce around the invisible box they were battling in. Jevil danced around most of the sound waves, only being nicked by one.

The carousel started to slow back to its original pace, but kept seesawing. Perhaps Jevil would have to up his game!

 "FAR FROM IT PIKACHU, I'M JUST GETTIN' STARTED, STARTED! METAMORPHOSIS!" The clown transformed into his weapon form, boomeranging around spamton, and lunging at him every 8th of a second. After a few throuple hits, spamton caught onto the pattern, and used mini-spams as deflections to catapult the attention away from himself. Jevil growled a little in frustration as tiny baby Spamtons jumped in his way as he tried to hit Spamton. His smile, however, never left his face.

"YOU FORGET I HAVE [[the boys]] WITH ME AT ALL TIMES? SPEAKING OF WHICH, HOW ABOUT WE PLAY [[DODGE PIPIS!]]" Spamton exclaimed, hurling pipis after pipis at the jester like they were snowballs... Explosive snowballs!

Jevil had just changed back into his normal form when spamton attacked, catching the jester off guard. "OH SEAM IN THE ANGEL'S HEAVEN-" Jevil got hit by three, which knocked his head off his block, springing up and down on his coiled spring neck. If Spamton could use decoys, so could he! Jevil sped up, admittedly tiring him out more than he liked. He went so fast, duplicates of himself were summoned, and it was hard for Spamton to pinpoint a target. ... Jevil had to think of something QUICK, Or else.. that last speck of hope in spamton may die. Wait... he knew! Jevil just needed an opportunity to escape this blue egg barrage... 

"ALTHOUGH A BIT EGGS-TREME, YOUR MOVE IS QUITE A BLAST!"

"..."

Spamton stopped in the middle of a throw, his brain processing what he just heard. Dial-up sounds took over his speech while his glasses blue-screened temporarily. After a moment, he shook his head like a dog, coming back to reality... and he let out the biggest most tortured groan.

"UUUUUUUUHHHHG... THOSE PUNS WERE   SO [[rotten to the core]] I THINK I'M GONNA THROW UP! @c@" Spamton grimaced, glaring at the clown grinning back at him, proud as can be.

As expected, Spamton recoiled his attacks to revive from that hard, mental blow of awful punnery. Jevil teleported away from his spot, into the void, plotting a sneak attack Spamton would never expect out of the likes of him... at least not one in the midst of battle. After the doll was done cringing, he was about to dodge jevil's attack... when he noticed the imp was no longer there. Now THAT wasn't fair!

"HEY WISE GUY! WHAT'S THE BIG [[deal!]] HIDING IS [[cheater cheater pumpkin eater!]]" 

Silence. Complete and utter silence... until he felt two gloves vibrate into his sides, startling him. He spun around, only to see nobody there.

"AYEE! H-HEY! F4CE   ME LIKE A [[valued customer]]!" Spamton shouted, his voice cracking as he was surprised by the sudden assault to his sides. He did a decent job of keeping his composure. Now he needed to stay vigilant. That clown could be anywhere.

"FACE YA LIKE A VALUED CUSTOMER, CUSTOMER?" Jevil giggled, appearing behind him again, however this time the gloves were off. The devil poked slowly up, and down the glitch's ribs. "LAST TIME I CHECKED IT WAS OPPOSITE DAY IN THE DARK WORLDS, WORLDS! IM THE SALESMAN, AND YOU'RE THE CUSTOMER! CAN YOU GUESS WHAT I'M SELLIN~?" 

A mischievous smile stretched across the joker's features. Spamton wiggled, his hands shooting down to grab Jevil's fingers, but he had already disappeared again.

"GYA!TYEEHEEHE- [[$!?!]] THE PRESSES! W-WHAT ARE YOU    DOING!?" the puppet demanded, wide eyed and looking in every direction to locate the culprit. "Y OU'RE NOT PLAYING [[fair share]], CLOWN!"

"I'M NOT PLAYIN FAIR, FAIR?" The jester's voice echoed against the void. The joker in question  chuckled from the darkness at this new game that would surely tire this puppet out. "WELL THERE'S NOTHING IN THE RULES AGAINST A LITTLE..." Jevil now appeared in front of him, a devious grin spread across his cheeks,"GIGGLY, GIGGLY, TICKLE, TICKLE NOW AND THEN~ BELIEVE ME, I DOUBLE CHECKED AND IT'S COMPLETELY LEGAL!" Jevil wiggled his eight fingers at Spamton, dull claws catching the dealmaker's attention. He jumped back, tripping a little bit before putting his hand up in defense as Jevil floated closer with that playfully evil stare.

"W-W-WAIT! HOLD 0N! Y-Y-YOU THINK THAT [[silly billy]] MOVE WILL WORK ON [[number1ratedsalesman1997]]? HA! TOO BAD FOR Y OU! I'M NOT [[tickles your fancy]]," Spamton retorted, squaring up, crossing his arms defiantly, and standing his ground. He knew Jevil wouldn't buy what he was selling, but he had to try. Unfortunately, though he was a good actor, the sudden rosiness of his cheeks called his bluff.

"OH... YOU AREN'T?" Jevil pretended to look convinced, before shrugging. "WELL... GUESS I WAS WRONG! I KNOW YOU'RE AN HONEST, HONEST SALESMAN. HMPH...  FIGURES... GUESS ILL HAVE TO JUST USE MY SPECIAL ATTACK, ATTACK!" Jevil shrugged, sounding disappointed... Did Spamton's lie actually work!? YES!!! THAT HAD NEVER WORKED! It hadn't worked on any Addison that had asked him, or even Seam! But somehow it worked on JEVIL!? Spamton thought he would see through that scam! Jevil really was a fool... 

"WHAT A [[sham]]. GUESS IT'LL HAVE TO DO! IM SURE I CAN HANDLE [[Specil move]]."

"YOU SUUUUURE...? IT'S PRETTY HARD TO DODGE!" Jevil smirked, summoning Spamton's own smirk.

"AH! SHOWING YOUR HAND, HUH? WELL Y OUR [[light shower]] OF SCYTHES IS IMPRESSIVE, BUT NOT SPECIL ENOUGH T0 DEFEAT ME," the salesman replied cheekily. His blush receded as his confidence grew once more. He could handle this. Jevil's special attack was always that giant scythe move.

" LET'S GET THIS [[show on the road]]. THEN I'LL SHOW YOU A RE4L ATTACK!" Spamton taunted.

"WE'LL SEE SPAMTON, SPAMTON!" Jevil flew back over in position before metamorphosing into a scythe, and shooting up towards the ceiling. One scythe fell down, then another and another and another... Spamton knew the rhythm of this attack, becoming a pro at dodging the basic attacks Jevil would usually give the player. 

After all the scythes fell, it left the giant undodgeable one to slowly fall. Spamton braced for impact, raising his arms above his head to protect his plastic noggin upon impact... but it never came. He opened a single eye to see two clawed hands hovering above his underarms, but he was too late to correct his fatal mistake. Jevil touched down, scribbling, and drawing shapes with his nails across the cloth of the salesman's jacket, which was surprisingly thinner than spamton had remembered. 

He tried to fight it, but he couldn't hold in what he didn't expect to come out!

"AYEEEEAHEAHEAHEAHEA! TH-THAHAHAT'S NOT HOHOHOW THIS WOR-GYYYAaAaAaA!" Spamton squealed out, clamping his arms down, knees buckling immediately. He was falling backwards into Jevil's hold due to his weak knees. The puppet took a deep breath to spit out the last coherent sentence he would be saying for a while.

"PLEASE-JEVIL-YOU-DON'T-HAVE-T0-DO-THIS-WE'RE-FRIENDS-R1GHT-PAL-I'LL-GIVE-Y0U-BEST-DEALS-4-LIFE-I-SWEAR!!!"

"JEVIL, JEVIL!?" Jevil paused as soon as he heard his name. His ACTUAL name... Spamton had never said his actual name before! "YOU CALLED ME JEVIL!!" Overjoyed, he squeezed Spamton in a rib cracking hug.

"AG-G-G-GYUH-Y-YOUR EARS MUST BE [[out of batteries]]! I-UHG- NEVER SAID [[legal name]]!" Spamton wheezed out, wiggling to free himself from Jevil's crushing grip.

Jevil loosened his hug a bit, however not enough to let Spamton out of his grasp. "HMMM... YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU'RE RIGHT! I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING BECAUSE OF HOW HARD YOU'RE LAUGHING!"

"WH-" Jevil started tickling again, one arm around Spamton's chest, raising his undershirt up, and the other hand trailing around the doll's stomach. 

"COOOOCHIE COOCHIE COO LITTLE SALESMAN~ ARE YOU TICKLISH, TICKLISH HERE HM? I THINK I CAN HEAR YOU GIGGLING, GIGGLING! I'M TOO DEAF TO HEAR REALLY ANYTHING, SO I'M NOT TOO SURE~!" Jevil noticed a little X where Spamton's bellybutton was supposed to be. He stored that information for much later in his playfully evil onslaught.

"STYAHAHAHAHEAHEAHEAHEA![[HOLY TOLEDO]] NYEAHEAHEAHEAHEAHEA!" Spamton cackled, squirming and kicking aimlessly in the clutches of the clown. He tried to grab at the offending hand exploring his sensitive belly.

Jevil pretended to just now notice his tail was plugging his ears. "OHHHH... THERE WAS THE PROBLEM! NOW I CAN HEAR YOU JUUUUST FINE! UHEHEHEHEEE... SUCH A TICKLISH LITTLE TUM-TUM, HM? GEEZ, I DUNNO HOW YOU CAN STAND IT, NO WAY I'D LAST! TIIIICKLE TICKLE TICKLE, TIIIICKLE~ KITCHY KIIITCH~"

"OHOHO MYHYHYHY GOHOHOHOHOD! SHUHUHUHUT YOUR [[PIE HOLE]] YOU- AYEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEEEE!" the puppet cried out. The tickling was already making him lose all control, and that was embarrassing enough, but the teasing? Jevil was going to kill him with all that sickeningly sweet baby talk. You could hardly make out Spamton's red cheeks due to how red the rest of his face was. All he wanted to do was curl up in a ball and hide from his adversary, but he wasn't in a position to do that. All he could do was flail and squeal... But the part that truly made the salesman want to hide was the fact that... he didn't hate this... At all. 

BUT HIS WORST ENEMY COULD NEVER KNOW THAT SO-

"THIHIHIHIHIHIS IHIHIHIHIS [[AGAINST THE GENEVA CONVENTION]] YOHOHOHOHOU ANIMAHAHAL!"

"A WAR CRIME? KEHEHE~" Jevil stopped, letting Spamton catch his breath. The puppet relaxed, his giggling mixed in with static as he panted. "SMILING DURING A WARCRIME DOESN'T SEEM VERY ORDERLY... THEN AGAIN I WOULDN'T KNOW ABOUT ORDER, ORDER! UEE HEE EHEE~ I THINK YOU ENJOY, ENJOY THIS, DON'T YOU SPAM-MAN?" Jevil questioned, a rare, genuine smile coming out.

"W-W-WHAT!? N-N-NO!!! THAT'S [[Crazy bread]]! I'M A PROFESSIONAL! I'M A [[BIGSHOT]]! BIGSHOTS DON'T-

DON'T -

DON'T -

DON'T -" 

Spamton glitched, his glasses blue screening again. His entire face to the tip of his nose was bright red, steam puffed out from the sides of his head, and a car horn beeped, the sound coming from Spamton's agape mouth.

Jevil chortled a bit, letting his battle buddy let the embarrassment out of his system. "DON'T WHAT? DON'T HAVE FUN, FUN? WHAT'S WRONG WITH A LITTLE GIGGLE EVERY NOW AND THEN, HM?" Jevil questioned out of curiosity, and assurance. "ITS OKAY TO BE GOOFY AND FEEL GOOFY EVERY NOW AND AGAIN, AGAIN! DON'T YOU THINK SO?" Jevil poked just a single digit on Spamton's side just above his hip, feather light to just get giggles out of the salesman.

"GyeYEEhehehehe NOHOHOhoho!" Spamton laughed, shaking his head and trying to hide his face with his hands. He was no longer trying to stop Jevil's hands, now focusing on covering his red hot cheeks. "J-JEVIL IHEEHEEHeehee CAHAHAHAN'T!" He jerked away from the prodding finger and was able to rock forward, still breathless with giggles as he weakly attempted to crawl away.

Jevil giggled sinisterly, floating after spamton before grabbing both of his ankles. "GYEHEHE~? NYOHO YOU CAN'T? TELL ME STOP AND MAYBE I'LL BELIEVE YOU~!"  Spamton fell on his padded tum as the devil pulled his legs out straight and sat on the back of his knees, hovering those ungloved claws above spamton's shoed tootsies. "UNTIL THEN, I GUESS ILL HAVE FUN WITH AN ENSY WEENSIE SPOT YOU DECIDED TO LEAVE OPEN~" Jevil playfully reminded, before slipping off both of those flat heeled leather shoes the salesman always wore. With no money to afford socks for those old shoes he found in the trash, Spamton's plush little feet were now completely exposed. 

oh. NO.

"W-W-WAIT! TH-THAHAHAT'S EVIL!" Spamton's eyes widened to the size of saucers when he felt himself get pinned under the jester's weight. "THOSE ARE [[fine Italian leather]] YOU [[little sponge]]!" A wobbly smile stretched across the peddler's face just from the threat alone. He curled up his toes, trying to get ready for what was to come.

"REALLY!? I THOUGHT THESE WERE PLEATHER!" Jevil teased, tracing two nails down  tiny feet, the delicate jointed toes scrunching up in response. Spamton snorted, trying to cover his mouth to hide his giggles and high pitched squeals. He only uncovered it to speak. "IHIT'S UHUP TO PLAHAHAYER INTERPRETAHATION!!" His puppet hands slammed back over his teeth, one trying to keep his bottom jaw closed and the other attempting to block the puppet mouth gap.

And with that.. another finger joined on both feet, now swirling and wiggling. 

"OHO... IT ISNT HEALTHY TO HOLD BACK YOUR LAUGHTER SPAMTON! LET IT AAAALL OUT. KEHEHEE~"

"NNN-NNNGYKHKHKHK... MMM-PFFFFFTAHAHEAHEAHEAHEA!" Spamton finally burst out into hysterics. He was slapping the floor, trying to find relief from the sensations plaguing his tiny feetsies.

"OH MY FOX! SEE? ARENT YOU HAVING FUN? YOU SEEM TO BE ENJOYING YOURSELF! UEEHEHEHEE~" Jevil teased, ever so gently raking his nails over every inch of the doll's feet, including under and between those lil' toesies! "WE SHOULD BATTLE LIKE THIS MORE OFTEN! THIS KIND OF GAME IS SO MUCH MORE FUN THAN THAT OLD NUMBERS GAME!'' Jevil turned around slightly, seeing the jolly old puppet snorting, and thumping his fists on the ground. Snickering, the joker pulled away, turning around to face him, still on seated Spamton's knees. The imp temporarily stood to gently maneuver spamton facing up so the puppet could catch his breath easier. 

"YOUHOU OKAY PINOCCHIO?" Jevil asked, giggling a bit at Spamton's expression.

"@c@ I'M -pant- STILL [[breathing the fresh air!]]" the spambot replied, recovering from that last attack. He rubbed his feet together to shoo away those dastardly phantom tickles left behind. "BUT I WILL NOT CONCEDE TO YOUR [[TOMFOOLERY]]. NEVER..."

"NEVER YOU SAY, SAY?" Spamton should NOT have given the jester such a sweet treat of an opening... 

Jevil picked the puppet up under the arms, bringing the salesman onto his lap with a previous idea brewing to the forefront of his mind.

"PERHAPS THE RIGHT SPOT WOULD CHANGE YOUR MIND~" Jevil smirked, pulling Spamton's shirt back up from before revealing his plush tum, booping a side just barely with the pad of his finger, keeping his claws to himself for the time being.

"EEHEEHEEP! R-RIGHT SPOT? N-NO THERE ARE NOT MORE [[spot remover]] I SWEAR. Y-YOU'RE WASTING YOUR [[time sensitive offer]]..." Spamton rushed out. He giggled nervously and gave Jevil a pleading look... but he still never said the magic word. Instead, the salesman grabbed onto the jester's hands, holding them away from his body.

"NO MORE SPOTS? OH NO, NO, NO! I THINK YOU'VE FORGOTTEN, FORGOTTEN A FEW MISTER~!" Jevil giggled gently pushing Spamton's arms back, the salesman's arms still jelly after the prior attacks. "LIKE THESE TWO HIPS!" Jevil kneaded his thumbs into the joints, just barely skimming the doll's sides with his claws.  Spamton flailed, kicking those little legs of his faster than a roadrunner. 

"HAAEHAHEHEEHEA!! [[Fifty percent off!]] JEHEH-SNORT! [[Ha ha ha!]]AHAAH-" 

"OOOOOORRRR..." Jevil crawled his hands to Spamton's sides and started to tickle that stuffed tum of his! "THIS LITTLE SWEET SPOT RIGHT HERE, HERE!"

"GYAAAHAEHEAHEAHEAHEA! NAHAHAT THE [[tummy wummy]]! AYEEHEEHEEHEE!" The spambot was lightly slapping at Jevil's chest as he squirmed fruitlessly. "YOHOHOURE THE DEHEHEVIL!"

"NOT THE TUMMY WUMMY? AW! BUT YOU SOUND LIKE YOU LOVE, LOVE THIS ON YOUR TUMMY WUMMY!" Jevil cooed, slowing the tickles down to be gentle. "DEVIL IS IN MY NAME! DON'T WEAR IT OUT~ OH! SPEAKING OF BEING EVIL,"  Jevil trailed off, drawing a single swirling finger around the canvas of spamton's belly, slithering around his middle in circles like a snake. "I WANNA SEE WHAT KIND OF GIGGLY TREASURE I CAN GET FROM THAT X!"

"NONONOHOHOHO! THAT [[parking spot]] IS [[out of commission]]! D-DOHOHON'T Y OU DAHAHAHARE!" Spamton squealed in protest. He immediately slapped his hands over his belly button to guard it from the devious clown.

"WELL THATS NOT VERY NICE!" Jevil teased, a challenging grin stretching onto his face... did Spamton really think he would only use his hands to tickle him to snorts? "GUESS WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO DO THIS THE HARD WAY... SAY, SPAMTON," the imp stretched his tail around and bent the tips of the J to tuck under the dummy's arms.  "I DON'T RECALL, BUT IS THIS A TERRIBLY, TERRIBLY SENSITIVE AREA~? COOOCHIE COOCHIE COOO LITTLE ADDISON~"

"NYAHAEHAEHAEHAEHAE! YOHOHOU [[$!?!]]!" That clever move by Jevil did the trick. Spamton immediately clamped his arms down, bringing his fists up to his chest. "STYAHAHAP TEASING MEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!"

"DO YOU NOT LIKE BEING TEASED TO BITS, SPAMMY? ALSO, IF YOU WANT TO KEEP MY TAIL UNDER YOUR ARMS, BE MY GUEST! OTHERWISE, OTHERWISE YOU CAN RAISE THEM UP AND TRY YOUR LUCK! UEEHEEHEE!'' While explaining this in a playful tone, Jevil went back to swirling around the little belly pudge, getting closer and closer to the spot of buried belly laughs.

"AHEAHAEHAEHAEHAE! YOU'RE GOHOHONNAHAHA [[killed]] MEEEEHEEHEE! SNORT!" the salesman cackled, hardly able to focus enough to make any comebacks. He was losing his mind, but he wasn't ready to surrender to this fiend.

Jevil etched closer... and closer... until finally he swirled right onto the little X, before stopping entirely. Everything stopped in place, the movement under his arms, the swirling, all that was on focus was the finger sitting still on the little stitch. Jevil gave Spamton a cat-like look of mischief, not doing anything but waiting out the inevitable. "YOU KNOW WHAT? LET'S STAY LIKE THIS A MOMENT, MOMENT! YOU ENJOYIN' YOURSELF? I KNOW A GENUINE SMILE WHEN I SEE ONE~" In actuality.. Jevil was planning his ultra tickle attack in the back of his mind during this one-sided conversation before finally unleashing the mother of all tickles.

"I-pant- [[dont trust like that]]... YOU... -pant- YOUR TEASING ME AGAIN! I-pant- I ADMIT TO NOTHING!" Spamton said defiantly. Maybe he could tough it out…

"DON'T TRUST ME? WHY SPAMMY! WHAT HAVE I DONE FOR YOU NOT TO TRUST ME?!" the joker questioned, feigning innocence. Spamton knew better than to trust a literal Jester devil after tickling him half to death when they were having a fair and square battle just before! Whatever happened to that anyway!? This wasn't fair at all! Spamton was getting tired. The look the doll gave Jevil after saying that said it all.

"AW... SPAMTON, I'M HURT! HEARTBROKEN, SHOT IN THE CHEST!" Jevil overdramatized, cocking an arm over his forehead, Spamton not seeming to notice both hands were off his belly. The puppet slowly but surely caught his breath as Jevil did his theatrics, all the while giving the purple imp a look of suspicion. After a moment, Jevil smirked, bringing a single arm around Spamton's ribs in a gentle hug to keep him still. "WELL, I THINK YOU DESERVE A PRESENT FOR BEIN SUCH A GOOD SPORT, AND HAVING AN ADORABLE LIL LAUGH!"

"I-I-I-I [[shut your yaps]]! WHAT ARE Y 0U PLANNING JEVIL?" the doll inquired suspiciously, his cheeks flushed from the embarrassing compliment on top.

"I DUNNO, DUNNO! I THINK IM PLANNING ON GIVING YOU A PRESENT FOR BEING A SNORTY, FLUFFY LITTLE GIGGLEBUG!" Jevil replied, his smirk unhindered. He leaned down just a little bit, trying to be inconspicuous.

"I-I'M NOT [[soft and fluffy]]! AND DON'T CALL ME A... [[ERROR 404]]!" Spamton squeaked in response, not wanting to repeat the new nickname. He didn't know what was going through that clown's mind, but he knew it was a grand finale. That look in Jevil's eyes said it all.

The look on Spamton's face read that the jig was up. With that, Jevil suddenly shifted his face downward towards the tummy before him, giggling a little before starting to ticklishly nom on the sensitive belly with those teefers of his! "OMNYomNYOMNOM~! I KNOWM YOUWH LOWVE WHEM SHAWM DIB DISH! OMNYOMMONCHCROMCHMOOMCH!" the devil teased playfully before bringing one claw down to tease a side while nomming away like a cat on a ball of yarn.

"AAAAHAHAHAHAHAEHAEHAEHAE! OHOHO [H E A V E N] IHIHIHI CAHAHAHAN'T! ICANTTAKEIT!" Spammy shrieked, shaking his head and pushing weakly at the little devil's shoulders. Tears of mirth were streaming down his rosy cheeks, and his glasses slid off his face and toppled to the side. He tossed his head back and curled forward over and over again, not knowing what to do. After 30 seconds or so, he broke.

"OHOHOHOKAAAAYEEEEHEEHEEHEE! Y 0U [[W1NNER]]! PLEEEHEEHEEHEEHEEEEE-SNORT-EEHEEHEASE! MEHEHERCYEEEEEHEEHEEE!"

As soon as the word was given, Jevil retracted his tail, and rose up from Spamton's tummy, letting the puppet recover from that final attack that left him breathless.

"AH... HAEHAE... HEHE... HEH... Ahhhh..." The puppet let the residual giggles bubble out of his throat while he breathed. He closed his eyes, feeling exhaustion take over. Spamton was waiting for Jevil to declare victory and kick him to the curb, back to his dumpster like the clown always did... But... He opened one of his eyes to see Jevil hovering with his legs crisscross, sitting on his tail, a genuine smile taking over his features.

"....SO?" The salesman asked, sitting up slightly to look the joker in the eye. 

"SO WHAT, WHAT?" the jester replied while leaning on two fists curiously.

"AREN'T YOU GOING TO [[dispose of any used needles!]]?"

Jevil's eyes widened in realization, before his face softened into an unnaturally gentle expression. 

"YOU CAN STAY HERE AS LONG AS YOU NEED, NEED! YOU DID JUST LAUGH YOUR STUFFING OUT AND ALL, "  Jevil explained, magically pulling a blanket out from behind his back and tossing it to Spamton, who caught it out of surprise. The salesman really didn't know what to think of all of this... The clown had never been nice to him like this. The other boss-darkner tended to be cold behind that mischievous, playful look in his eyes... He was that one step away from freedom, blocking his only escape to the real world.. HEAVEN. ... but never had Jevil acted like this before... It almost reminded him of a family he lost long ago.

The doll looked down at the blanket in his lap. Then up at the clown.

"I... um... thank you..." Spamton was shocked enough to lose the glitches that stole his speech for just a moment.  A sudden "POOF" from under his butt and a cushiony feeling alerted him to the cat bed he was now sitting in. He tried to take offense to that, but he couldn't. Instead he took the opportunity to get some sleep in a real bed...first time in a long time. He curled up, snuggled in the blanket. The salesman drifted off to sleep quickly, having not been this comfortable in so long.

Jevil hummed in content. He needed this. They both did. They were both being tortured endlessly by the game they lived in ... and them fighting all the time was tiring. In this moment they both realized how stupid it was, the endless fighting. They both understood what it was like to be thrown away, not only by society, but by the game itself. If anything they should be allies... No... friends.

Of all the things to make them see that... It was this particular fight. Jevil giggled at the prospect that something so silly may have just permanently changed how the two misfits saw each other.

And that was a wonderful thing.

#lee!spamton #spamton lee spamton #ler!jevil #deltarune tickles #tickle fanfiction #ticklish!spamton #Ohmygoshthiswassomuchfun #I needed this severely #deltarune fluff #FLUUUUUFF #[[no Spamtons were harmed in the making of this fic]] #OH LOOK THEY MADE A FIC OF US US #W-WAIT WHY DID I HAVE TO BE THE [[sacrifice]] IN THIS [[Best selling novel]]!? #CUZ I GOTS MORE LER ENERGY THAT YOU YOU #UEEHEEHEE #I RESENT TH4T [[5 pounds of balogna]] STATEMENT #Man we have to do this again... Vengeance perhaps??? #Yeeeeees >:3

[insanelyadd]

If the song fits it fits, regardless of possible embarrassment. Anyway, lets hear what songs you put together, and what your reasons are!

Oh ho ho, you just gave me a chance to talk about music, hee hee hoo hoo.

Okay so I'll start with the playlist I made for the Collector, as a heads up note about all of these playlists, I am far from done, so while they're all short right now, I will be getting around to adding more.

Through Glass by Stone Sour -

'Cause I'm looking at you through the glass Don't know how much time has passed All I know is that it feels like forever When no one ever tells you that forever feels like home Sitting all alone inside your head How do you feel? That is the question But I forget you don't expect an easy answer When something like a soul becomes initialized And folded up like paper dolls and little notes You can't expect a bit of hope So while you're outside looking in Describing what you see Remember what you're staring at is me (...) How much is real? So much to question An epidemic of the mannequins Contaminating everything We thought came from the heart It never did right from the start Just listen to the noises (Null and void instead of voices) Before you tell yourself It's just a different scene Remember it's just different from what you've seen (...) And it's the stars The stars that shine for you And it's the stars The stars that lie to you, yeah-ah And it's the stars The stars that shine for you And it's the stars The stars that lie to you, yeah-ah

I cannot stress enough that these are the actual lyrics and I did not move them around or anything, all I did was remove the repeating verses/choruses. This song came out in 2006. An absolute shoe-in to be used in AMVs for this little guy except it's a rock song from 2006 and not an indie-pop song from the last five years and it's also not popular.

I was doing my usual thing like a week or two ago where I go through a bunch of songs I heard on the radio when I was in elementary school and as I was relistening to this song I felt like I had lost my mind. I remember relating to this song a lot when I was little kid because the song is about being lonely, and I think the Collector would relate to it too. More kids should listen to rock music from the 2000s because I am deluded* and think a lot of it is good. Music critics tremble before me when they try to say nu metal is bad and I just say "Nah".

(*Yes I do have psychosis and have delusions for realsies, I can use this word)

After this it's all under the cut because this post will end up being long because I fucking love talking about lyrics and the fun little picture shows my brain makes when I hear a song that fits a character. if you don't feel like reading the Archivists playlist discussion be happy knowing I summed all of them up in one picture:

No Lullaby by Siames -

What's the meaning when you have a broken home, home, home? Where's the love when you were left on your own? So alone

The most relevant lyrics in the song are the chorus because the verses on this song are super abstract, like more than their other songs that I've heard. Final lines of the song are the above lines but instead of "so alone" it says "Who says you're on your own?" which feels like how their arc concludes in the show.

All the Best by Siames -

Let's play pretend now Don't be afraid, no Stop being worried this could be the way We are what we made up Ready for a new start Follow your dreams no other way will be that great And I'll keep searching for all the best Picture yourself in a rocket and believe you can be anything you want The meaning of our actions feeds the power of attraction, let it flow Just let it flow It's right under our noses Going through our minds With passion and devotion (with passion and devotion) Your light can be our sun

I feel the lyrics here are pretty self-explanatory. Since the band is Argentinian I'm going to forgive any wonkyness in the lyrics.

Steal My Sunshine by LEN -

Genuinely the lyrics for this song are very abstract but apparently it was written when the brother and sister of the group were having a fight. Though I think the lines "And of course you can't become if you only say what you would have done, So I missed a million miles of fun" are pretty good. Also it sort of just sounds like a song he would like.

Island In The Sun by Wheezer -

On an island in the sun We'll be playing and having fun And it makes me feel so fine I can't control my brain We'll run away together We'll spend some time forever We'll never feel bad anymore

Escapism, sun motif, easy pick for the Collector. Plus the song itself has this sort of fun, laid back up-beatness to it.

Kids by MGMT -

You were a child, crawling on your knees toward it Making momma so proud But your voice is too loud We like to watch you laughing You pick the insects off plants No time to think of consequences Control yourself Take only what you need from it A family of trees wanting To be haunted (...) The memories fade like looking through a fogged mirror Decision to decisions are made and not bought But I thought this wouldn't hurt a lot, I guess not

I made a whole AMV for the Collector and King set to this song, it's a perfect fit, if I were to post all the relevant lyrics I would probably end up posting the whole song. Actually fuck it I'll post them anyways for everyone who's never heard this song.

Fine by Lemon Demon - (the sped up version)

Light is on the way, we'll be having a fun time It's such a lovely day, we should pocket the sunshine And never give it back, even if there's a heat wave We're stalling on the track, it will just be a close shave I know (I know) That in a snap, all the birds will sing I know (I know) I'm full of crap, but still Everything works out nice in the end The sun will marry the moon It'll be fine Why don't we sit back, mellow again And have a nice afternoon? It'll be fine

I feel like this is a fun song for them. Once again sun and moon imagery in the song, outwardly cheerful and bouncy in that way, but menacing at the same time.

GRRRLS by Aviva - (specifically the version that's a Collector animatic)

I can't explain it better than the video explains itself, so here's a link

Best of You by Foo Fighters -

I've got another confession to make I'm your fool Everyone's got their chains to break Holding you Were you born to resist or be abused? Is someone getting the best, the best, the best The best of you?

I think it fits thematically with the Collector breaking free from the cycle of abuse he was subjected to.

When I'm Gone by 3 Doors Down -

So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong Hold me when I'm scared and love me when I'm gone Everything I am and everything in me Wants to be the one you wanted me to be I'll never let you down even if I could I'd give up everything if only for your good So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong You can hold me when I'm scared, you won't always be there So love me when I'm gone Love me when I'm gone But when your education x-ray cannot see under my skin I won't tell you a damn thing that I could not tell my friends Been roaming through this darkness, I'm alive but I'm alone And part of me is fighting this but part of me is gone

Most annoying thing on the face of the earth when you're making playlists for child characters or siblings with terrible relationships is probably that every goddamn song you find where the lyrics are vague enough to be interpreted as a familial relationship and not romantic was probably still originally written to be romantic *strangles amatonormativity with my bare fucking hands for an hour straight*

So anyways in this context the song is about the Collector trying to reconcile their feelings about their family being shitty with their want to connect and love people and be comforted by the familiar.

Now for the playlists for the Archivists. I encourage you to look at the scroll bar on your screen. I will not judge you for looking at it and deciding you've read enough, especially since my Archivists (anyone's Archivists really) are totally made up and are basically OCs inhabiting a hole left by canon. I still have fun with them tho.

Penumbra first because she has the shortest playlist (Sorry Penny it's hard to find songs about being stressed by raising your younger siblings and being emotionally and mentally drained by stress)

Help! by The Beatles -

So much younger than today (I never need) I never needed anybody's help in any way (Now) but now these days are gone (these days are gone) I'm not so self assured (And now I find) now I find I've changed my mind And opened up the doors (...) In oh so many ways (My independ-) my independence seems to vanish in the haze (But) but every now and then (now and then) I feel so insecure

Once again on closer inspection of the lyrics I think this is AGAIN about romance. I choose to ignore it. I Do Not See It. I'm taking the implications out back and shooting them. Mainly I chose this song because it was kind of funny for everyone's playlists to be songs from the last 30 years mostly and Penny is out here like "I relate to this Beatles song which is a literal cry for help" someone save this woman (nonbinary).

Stressed Out by twenty one pilots -

Sometimes a certain smell will take me back to when I was young How come I'm never able to identify where it's coming from? I'd make a candle out of it if I ever found it Try to sell it, never sell out of it, I'd probably only sell one

*putting on a very serious face* She's stressed, she yearns for the nostalgia of when she wasn't responsible for so many things. The part about making money means nothing because I don't think Collectors participate in any economy because it's implied they don't need to eat and they could probably just magic up whatever they want/need.

Dog Days Are Over by Florence and the Machine -

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers Leave all your love and your longing behind You can't carry it with you if you want to survive And I never wanted anything from you Except everything you had and what was left after that too, oh Happiness hit her like a bullet in the back Struck from a great height by someone who should know better than that

She wants to stop being so stressed out all the time but I think if she suddenly stopped experiencing it she would probably explode. Girl needs a therapist so badly. And a vacation. I like this song because when I looked up the meaning it was like "Bad days will end and things will get better one day" and the lyrics describe the incoming happiness as graphically fatal and terrifying in its approach like being hit by a fucking train in the first two lines of the song.

D.A.N.C.E. by Justice -

No need to analyze the lyrics here, I think she would just genuinely like this song and dance to it, though I think part of it is that there's a little bit of desperation in the way it's sung, like "please dance you have to dance or you will die" which is probably how she would feel if she was given time to relax like "oh wow this has never happened before, am I supposed to be afraid?"

Next I'll do Crescent because why not. "Birth" order, sure. Also Crescent's songs should be fairly easy to explain

The Pretender by Foo Fighters -

Keep you in the dark You know they all pretend Keep you in the dark And so it all began Send in your skeletons Sing as their bones go marching in again They need you buried deep The secrets that you keep are ever ready Are you ready? (...) What if I say I'm not like the others? What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays? You're the pretender What if I say I will never surrender? I'm the voice inside your head You refuse to hear I'm the face that you have to face Mirroring your stare I'm what's left, I'm what's right I'm the enemy I'm the hand that'll take you down Bring you to your knees So, who are you? Yeah, who are you? Yeah, who are you? Yeah, who are you? Keep you in the dark You know they all pretend

I mean. She's a liar, a pretender, she's keeping a secret (having their parent taken away) from her siblings. He's an evil bastard. This explanation will be the standard response to most songs in this playlist but maybe from different angles.

Dangerous by Big Data ft Joywave -

Nobody's listening when we're alone Nobody's listening, there's nobody listening, No one can hear us when we're alone No one can hear us, no, no one can hear us And I've gotta get out of here Sink down, into the dark Keep on running I've gotta get out of here (Keep on running) Sink down, into the dark You understand, they got a plan for us I bet you didn't know that I was dangerous It must be fate, I found a place for us I bet you didn't know someone could love you this much

A little bit uncharacteristically paranoid for Crescent tbh, but the song is fucking awesome and even though the most fitting part of the song is only one line "I bet you didn't know that I was dangerous" it is sung in this sort of taunting way that really has enough threatening intent to be perfect for him.

Miss Murder by AFI -

With just a look, they shook And heavens bowed before him Simply a look can break your heart The stars that pierce the sky He left them all behind We're left to wonder why He left us all behind

After reading the lyrics I have a suspicion they aren't what 10 year old me interpreted them to be about. That's alright. I can imagine the verses are about all the times Crescent has made cults to worship her (I have a HC that Collectors primarily do this as a means of acquiring samples from all the planets they visit because it's easier to convince the most advanced life on the planet that you are a god who demands tribute and getting them to mobilize for you VS going around finding all the animals and plants and whatever else yourself).

I Can't Decide by Scissor Sisters -

I've got to hand it to you You've played by all the same rules It takes the truth to fool me And now you've made me angry I can't decide Whether you should live or die Oh, you'll probably go to heaven Please don't hang your head and cry No wonder why My heart feels dead inside It's cold and hard and petrified Lock the doors and close the blinds We're going for a ride

Did I tell you guys??? Did I mention??? Crescent likes to kill people???? Most interesting part of this choice is how the truth will fool him, which is true. If she believes something that isn't true about you and makes the wrong assumptions based on that it's better for you in the long run, though continued exposure to her increases the chances that he'll eventually realize he made the wrong guess and then he'll get Very Mad about it.

Breezeblocks by alt-J -

No lyrical analysis because yeah they don't really fit but I like the song for the vibe, mainly the ending, though that sort of repetitive mania isn't really in line with how I characterize Crescent. I personally love it, this song triggers my mania sometimes and it's great.

Lone Digger by Caravan Palace -

Another one where it's less about how I write the character and more about what I think she'd like to listen or dance to. I think she would enjoy the frantic energy of the song.

You're Gonna Go Far Kid by Offspring -

Show me how to lie, you're getting better all the time And turning all against the one is an art that's hard to teach Another clever word sets off an unsuspecting herd And as you step back into line, a mob jumps to their feet (...) With a thousand lies and a good disguise Hit 'em right between the eyes Hit 'em right between the eyes When you walk away, nothing more to say See the lightning in your eyes See 'em running for their lives Slowly out of line, and drifting closer in your sight So play it out, I'm wide awake, it's a scene about me There's something in your way and now someone is gonna pay And if you can't get what you want, well, it's all because of me

I feel like the picture here is clear, liar, manipulative, doesn't show her true face so she's always in disguise (metaphorically), the implication of murder/fighting. *slaps the hood of this song* This baby can fit so many of Crescent's worst qualities in it.

I Get It by CheVelle -

So you say you're ignored, as it is Well, give us your sad, sad trip You're right, I get it It all makes sense, you're the perfect person So bright, so wrong Let's all live in your imaginary life Assumed it's whether We're right, or wrong We're doomed and there's plenty for all How dare you catch me counting? How dare you call at all? How dare you call this suffering? How dare you call at all?

Crescent's inner monologue if either of the Twins voice their concerns about anything. Someone needs to hit him with a car.

Annihilation by A Perfect Circle -

It's your choice, your choice, your choice, your choice, Peace or annihilation

This song I think is originally about the American military industrial complex and nuclear war. So anyways for my dumb little OC's playlist this is basically the choice they give the people of the planets they visit if they start to get hostile. "Hey, I know things are tense but have you considered that I will boil your oceans and burn your world to ash if you don't choose to be nice?" Obviously it's also another instance of the song only really having one or two lines that strongly fit the vibe but you see the vision?

You're Going Down by Sick Puppies -

Define your meaning of war To me, it's what we do when we're bored I feel the heat comin' off of the blacktop And it makes me want it more Because I'm hyped up, out of control If it's a fight, I'm ready to go I wouldn't put my money on the other guy If you know what I know that I know (...) This is hardly worth fighting for But it's the little petty shit that I can't ignore When my fist hits your face and your face hits the floor It'll be a long time comin' Bet you got the message now 'Cause I was never goin' Yeah, you're the one that's going down

Oh hey one thing I haven't said about Crescent yet is she sometimes beats the shit out of her siblings (mainly Solari who instigates it on purpose even though she knows she'll lose because it's worth it to them to get under his skin). Well when I say "beats the shit out of them" I mean it more like Crescent can get a single good solid hit in and it knocks Solari down and the fight is over. Solari has never actually been mad enough to push their luck into a full-on brawl with Crescent. If Solari actually, for real, wants to fight him then she duels him with magic instead because it's an even match-up.

Next up I'll do Solari

She also has You're Going Down, but intended from the opposite perspective, while Crescent is the singer, Solari is the listener.

The Red by CheVelle -

The red Well, it filters through So lay down The threat is real When his sight Goes red again Seeing red again Seeing red again

You might be wondering, is this another song from Solari's perspective about Crescent? No. Solari gets so mad she basically loses all control of herself, hence the destruction of property she does. If they ever got actually mad enough to actually fight Crescent for real with their hands, she would be a very dirty fighter. She sees Crescent on her missions visiting the worlds of mortals. She's watched him fight for thousands of years. Crescent has never seen Solari fight with their hands. She might not be as physically strong as he is but she would be able to have the advantage of Crescent not knowing what to expect. Plus if Satellite is there and something has made their twin THAT mad then they would join in too.

Headstrong by Trapt -

Conclusions manifest Your first impressions got to be your very best I see you're full of shit and that's alright That's how you play, I guess you get through every night Well, now that's over I see your fantasy You wanna make it a reality paved in gold See inside, inside of our heads, yeah Well, now that's over I see your motives inside Decisions to hide Back off, I'll take you on Headstrong to take on any one I know that you are wrong Headstrong, we're headstrong

Solari's mind when they're about to start shit with Crescent again. Unrelated I saw the band was marked red on my screen earlier and I was like "???" for a half second before remembering the lead singer is a dipshit loser who whines on twitter and facebook because I guess he has nothing better to do. May the miserable cretin never chart again.

Oh No! by Marina -

I just wanna change I just wanna change I just wanna change I just wanna change I just wanna change I know exactly what I want and who I want to be I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy Oh! Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no, oh! One track mind, one track heart If I fail, I'll fall apart Maybe it is all a test 'Cause, I feel like I'm the worst So I always act like I'm the best

We've come to the portion of the playlist where Solari is consumed by guilt and regret. It's actually not separated like that, I'm just saying these lines speak to how she wants to change who she is as a person because she realizes she doesn't like who she currently is. Not that Penumbra or Crescent would know she's trying to get better, because Solari doesn't respect either of them and does not put in effort into improving herself for them, she's doing it for her little brother, the Collector. Even if she never gets to see them again.

Bother by Stone Sour -

Wish I was too dead to cry My self-affliction fades Stones to throw at my creator Masochists to which I cater You don't need to bother I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on I won't let go 'til it bleeds Wish I was too dead to care If indeed I cared at all Never had a voice to protest So you fed me shit to digest I wish I had a reason My flaws are open season For this, I gave up trying One good turn deserves my dying

I did mention they are being eaten alive by guilt and regrets right? This is for when Solari is having a bad time in her head.

Riot by Three Days Grace -

If you feel so empty So used up, so let down If you feel so angry So ripped off, so stepped on You're not the only one refusing to back down You're not the only one, so get up Let's start a riot A riot Let's start a riot

Solari is ready and back to being angry. They totally would incite a riot if they felt like they had a good enough reason to start one.

Fine Again by Seether -

And I am aware now Of how everything's gonna be fine One day, too late, I'm in Hell I am prepared now Seems everyone's gonna be fine One day, too late, just as well I feel a dream in me expire And there's no one left to blame it on I hear you label me a liar 'Cause I can't seem to get this through

Just kidding it's Solari Emo Hours again. The only line in the song that doesn't really apply are the lines about staying sober because I HC that there isn't really any chemical that has any effect on Collectors like that. Anyways this is Solari being like "Wow the two older siblings were able to just go back to pretending everything is fine after getting rid of our baby sibling what the fuck."

These next three songs Solari shares with Satellite so I'll talk about why I chose them for both.

Send the Pain Below by CheVelle -

I liked having hurt So send the pain below Where I need it You used to beg me to take care of things And smile at the thought of me failing But long before having hurt I'd send the pain below I'd send the pain below Much like suffocating Much like suffocating (...) You used to run me away all while laughing Then cry about the fact 'til I returned But long before having hurt I'd send the pain below I'd send the pain below

This is a bit messy but whenever the lines say "You did this" that's a perspective shift for the line from the twins' perspective to The Collector. Basically another song about the twins regretting being shitheads to their baby brother.

Breaking The Habit by Linkin Park -

Memories consume Like opening the wound I'm picking me apart again You all assume I'm safe here in my room Unless I try to start again I don't want to be the one The battles always choose 'Cause inside I realize That I'm the one confused I don't know what's worth fighting for Or why I have to scream I don't know why I instigate And say what I don't mean I don't know how I got this way I know it's not alright So, I'm breaking the habit I'm breaking the habit tonight

I'm going to assume some of this song is about some type of addiction. I'm disregarding that. Anyways the part about behavioral issues and not knowing why you act the way you do does align with the twins, and I mentioned it previously with Solari, about her trying to get better for the Collector, if he ever returns, but the same applies to Satellite. Though Satellite is at least attempting to practice this with Penumbra and Crescent. It's kind of difficult because they're so afraid of both of them, and Crescent avoids talking to them whenever he's actually around.

Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men -

I don't like walking around this old and empty house So hold my hand, I'll walk with you my dear The stairs creak as you sleep It's keeping me awake It's the house telling you to close your eyes And some days I can't even dress myself It's killing me to see you this way 'Cause though the truth may vary This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore There's an old voice in my head That's holding me back Well, tell her that I miss our little talks Soon it will be over and buried with our past We used to play outside when we were young And full of life and full of love Some days I don't know if I am wrong or right Your mind is playing tricks on you, my dear 'Cause though the truth may vary This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore Don't listen to a word I say (Hey) The screams all sound the same (Hey) And though the truth may vary This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore You're gone, gone, gone away I watched you disappear All that's left is a ghost of you Now we're torn, torn, torn apart There's nothing we can do Just let me go, we'll meet again soon Now wait, wait, wait for me, please hang around I'll see you when I fall asleep

Yeah it's basically the full song. Once again the lyrics were vague and I had to dig around to find out it was written with romance in mind but I am sending my fucking mind beams out and blowing that up. Anyways tell me this couldn't be about Satellite and Solari's guilt for how they treated their little sibling and the last verse here where they "watched you disappear" is about when the Collector was imprisoned, and the torn apart bit is how they feel about their family. I might not identify as asexual anymore (further testing necessary I'll get back to you all on this if it turns out to be true) but I am still going to be fucking grabbing songwriters in my mouth and violently shaking them. Please can you just write complex interesting relationships into songs without being "OH YEAH IT'S ROMANCE" man there's other types of love. Please. I am on my fucking hands and knees.

*double checks playlist* Oh shit Fine Again by Seether is also on Satellite's playlist. Same explanation applies. Don't feel like moving shit around and adding accommodations in the existing text, I've been working on this for four hours because I have severe ADHD and I am dogshit at prioritizing anything.

If you get this far comment on the post about my brave stance that if a candle smells good enough I would eat it. It hasn't happened yet but my toasted coconut s'more candle tempts me every fucking time I smell it.

Anyways now it's Just Satellite

Unwell by Matchbox Twenty -

Hold on, feelin' like I'm headed for a breakdown And I don't know why But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell I know, right now you can't tell But stay a while and maybe then you'll see A different side of me I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired I know, right now you don't care But soon enough you're gonna think of me And how I used to be, me

Fun fact I actually listen to this song when I feel like I might be about to have a bout of existential terror or some other flavor of mental breakdown and singing along to it calms me down. Obviously, Satellite would be able to relate about feeling gripped by a nebulous madness that Changes You when it hits. I actually have an idea for what I might have unintentionally gave them. Like. This is buried deep enough no one will hit it.

Anyways like a few days after I wrote my fucking long ass post about the Archivists and Collector's relationships and related HC and shit I began wondering. "Am I Autistic??" Asked a friend who is autistic and has ADHD at the same time (like what I would have if the answer to this wonder is yes) and she gave me some things to read about it and I was like "oh my fucking god this is literally all me." and then, because I'm some type of menace freak and I reread my posts that I like frequently, I reread my post about the Archivists and shit and I was like "Ah fuck are they all autistic??? I knew I couldn't write neurotypical people because I have literally never been one but seriously??????"

Point is: I might be autistic. Mentioning it here and now because it seems like getting an actual diagnosis is going to be a huge fucking pain in the ass and won't happen for months. And I might have made the Archivists all autistic or probably other slivers of my various other mental illnesses because I am physically incapable writing a neurotypical person. Circling around to what started this tangent: Satellite absolutely has autistic meltdowns. I don't know if ADHD people get meltdowns like how I imagine Satellite gets them, but they are modeled after My Own experiences with having meltdowns. So anyways back to music analysis in relation to my dumbass little OCs.

Bound For The Floor by Local H -

Born to be down I've learned all my lessons before now Born to be down I think you'll get used to it And you just don't get it, you keep it copacetic And you learn to accept it, you know you're so pathetic (...) Born to be down I think that I've said this before now Born to be down What good is confidence?

I've actually always related this song to mental illness, ever since I was a kid, I always associated the song with the struggles of growing up neurodivergent and how it beats you down and you learn to accept it and live with it.

Words As Weapons by Seether -

All I really want is something beautiful to say Keep me locked up in your broken mind I keep searchin', never been able to find a Light behind your dead eyes Not anything at all You keep living in your own lie, ever-deceitful and ever-unfaithful Keep me guessin', keep me terrified Take everything from my world (...) Keep me dumb, keep me paralyzed Why try swimming? I'm drowning in fables You're not that saint that you externalize You're not anything at all It's oh-so playful when you demonize To spit out the hateful, you're willing and able Words are weapons I'd be terrified You're nothing in my world

Now a song for how Satellite feels about Crescent. Once again, about a person who lies and projects a self that isn't true to who they really are, and the singer is terrified of them, which fits because that's how Satellite feels about their older brother. Crescent is physically strong and gifted with weapons but her best weapon is her charisma and charm and how she uses it to manipulate people.

Keep Talking by Pink Floyd -

There's a silence surrounding me I can't seem to think straight I sit in the corner And no one can bother me I think I should speak now (why won't you talk to me?) I can't seem to speak now (you never talk to me) My words won't come out right (what are you thinking?) I feel like I'm drowning (what are you feeling?) I'm feeling weak now (why won't you talk to me?) But I can't show my weakness (you never talk to me) I sometimes wonder (what are you thinking?) Where do we go from here (what are you feeling?) I feel like I'm drowning (You never talk to me) you know I can't breathe now (What are you thinking?) We're going nowhere (What are you feeling?) We're going nowhere (Why won't you talk to me?) (You never talk to me) (What are you thinking?) (Where do we go from here?)

Now I saved this one for last even though it was literally the first song I ever started associating with Satellite because I think it really fits them. I think this is what it's like from their perspective when they have a meltdown. I don't really know how else to describe it so I guess I'll break this down line by line because sunk cost fallacy at this point why not.

"There's a silence surrounding me" in my own experience with meltdowns, which is what Satellite's are based off of, I find that all the blood rushes to my ears and I sort of lose the ability to recognize sound?

"I can't seem to think straight" probably self-explanatory but in my experience I stop having coherent thought and kind of only think in impulses.

"I sit in the corner, and no one can bother me," though this wasn't always the case (like when you're a child experiencing this you don't really understand what is even happening, and you develop this later in like when it's more like "ah this shit again") you will typically try to remove yourself from the situation that is causing you the distress that makes you have a meltdown in the first place.

"I think I should speak now, I can't seem to speak now, My words won't come out right" this could either be interpreted as a meltdown where you just shut down and stop talking or a meltdown where you fucking scream, I tended to have ones where I would just scream, but that might be because when I get the other way I end up crying silently instead so I might have filed those moments away as just normal "I am sad" moments?

"I feel like I'm drowning" meltdowns can be overwhelming, and when I'm overwhelmed I tend to stop my feet and flail my arms and sort of contort myself because?? I don't know. It feels like I'm trying to escape my own body honestly. Drowning in myself.

"I'm feeling weak now, but I can't show my weakness" this shit is fucking humiliating to have happen in public and around other people man, it sucks ass.

So anyways that is my ridiculously long ass post about music and my little bastards (and baby, the Collector is only baby) that I spent FIVE HOURS writing. I am going to go wash my hands because Bad Texture, drink some water, and then get floor time which is time where I lie face down on my floor and pretend to be a dead body.

#toh the collector #the collector #toh the archivists #the archivists #I am not going to fucking tag all these bands do you want me to be here for six hours??? #musical discussion #if you want to skip to the end I did a great analysis of Keep Talking by Pink Floyd #and how you could interpret it as a song about having a meltdown #answears #long post under the cut #I am not fucking kidding if you open this post Prepare Yourself #toh spoilers

[friedfriedchicken]

Can i politely request some flower language (European or Hanakotoba) for Dinobot? (Code of Hero, my beloved...)

OH BOY YOU HAVE ACTIVATED MY BRAIN AND I'M RUNNING ON LATE NIGHT ENERGY LET'S GO!!!

Camellia

In Victorian Flower language, white camellias represent admiration, respect, and perfection so they've had history with being used at weddings and funerals. Pink camellias symbolize longing for someone. It can be used both platonically and romantically and can be sent to someone to say "I miss you." Red and yellow camellias represent passion and uniqueness respectively.

In Hanakotoba red camellias represent love and "perishing with grace" due to the fact that camellias lose their entire head when they wilt instead of one petal at a time. There's a term for that called ochitsubaki, translated as "fallen camellia", as samurai would avoid planting these flowers because of their style of wilting looking similar to how samurai would behead people during executions. Bad luck vibes there. Also yellow camellias represent longing in Hanakotoba and white camellias mean waiting!

Lily

Victorian Flower Language assigns white lilies the concept of purity and is often associated with mothers. Orange lilies represent revenge and/or hatred while lilies of the valley represent sweetness and tiger lilies means wealth! Lilies also represents the soul of the dead returning to a peaceful place when present at a funeral. Pairing that up with Dinobot, especially considering how Code of Hero ends, feels super fitting to me. QwQ

Hanakotoba says that white lilies are a symbol of purity while red spider lilies symbolize final goodbyes (which is why you get a lot of them in anime and stuff lol). Other than that, lilies share most of their Hanakotoba meanings with its' Victorian meanings.

Zinnia

For Victorian Flower Language, yellow zinnias equate to honoring and remembering someone daily because of its similarity to the sun. Red zinnias represent the heart, bonds, and eternal love (romantically or platonically!). Pink zinnias represent lasting friendships and love as well as love for one's father. As the trend continues, white zinnias mean pureness.

For Hanakotoba, I don't have much resources on zinnias besides the fact that they are a symbol of loyalty and faithfulness but that fits Dinobot anyways, especially with his arc in Code of Hero.

WHEW ALL DONE

Scrambling around to gather up flower pictures felt like I was a busy little mouse in an old kid's story book hee hoo

ANYWAYS- thank you for the request and I hope you have fun with the flower info!

#FriedFlowers #Dinobot #Transformers #TFBeastWars #Camellia #Lily #Zinnia #Flower Languages #Going insane slowly yet peacefully and willingly #Flowers <3

[a-mag-a-day]

Sending this a bit early because I'm about to go to bed and I'm going on a trip tomorrow and won't be able to check this page (the switch between days for a-mag-a-day happens right at midnight at my timezone!) I'm excited to see if there's any Raymond Fielding fanart for this episode because I've literally never seen fanart of him before. I'm not a huge fan of his but my tma sideblog is sorta named after him because my name is Raymond too lol. Anyways I love the title for this episode its such a clever little double meaning hee hoo And I liked the way that kids being stuck in the system works so well with The Web. I hadn't really noticed or thought about it before, but this time I was thinking about how Ronald was talking about his life being out of his own control and stuff. I just like when I realize the deeper level a statement works for a certain entity beyond surface level Spooky Spider Events lmfao

Yeah this episode feels deeper than it presents on a number of levels

I'll be on the lookout for episode art as usual! 👍

#a mag a day #tma #the magnus archives #episode asks #mod ashes #tma spoilers #mag 59 #gnarlystarships

[riftwalker-limbro]

Hee hoo ask time

7, 9 and 11 for Kelth, and 8 and 15 for Sufford! Sorry if that's too many, you gave me tools to ask for OC lore without having to be smart and i am enjoying this power immensely. Anyway if it's too many just pick what you wanna answer most :D

>:D i am having so many excited-jitters about this whole thing. tingly. i hadn't actually thought about the questions in relation to my own guys very much which. shouldn't surprise me as much but. hee

OKAY OKAY TO WORK rubs hands

Kelth, 7: What is your favourite thing about this character? well one of the first things about them is that i wanted them to have something to do with programming. because i'm a programmer and i needed more self-insert OCs in my arsenal. SPECIFICALLY i was imagining what it'd be like for someone ingame to try organize their void relic shit without a google sheet. and that kind of. DRASTICALLY snowballed. into kind of this whole blog. there are a lot of smaller things but this one is the one that makes me smile the quickest & most joyfully (angst potential is a close second but that's a more evil grin)

Kelth, 9: Do they keep in contact with old classmates/friends/other Tenno? What is their connection? well shit uh. i haven't thought about this before so this is shiny new lore (and part of why i love ask games). they don't keep in contact, they don't reach out by themselves, because social contact requirements wise they're fulfilling all their needs with Ordis & the warframes already, and they weren't fantastic friends with the other kids to start with. nothing like bullying, just... they weren't exactly included by the others in stuff. they fit in enough to not be bullied, but not enough to be included. but if they're contacted by someone they used to know (and, if we're going with they both remember The Old Days) they'll be polite & nice & maybe even genuinely enjoy it for a bit. but their social battery would drain fast

Kelth, 11: Are they comfortable jumping out of their Warframe and showing their own bodies to others? Why (not)? HAHA NO. Noooo Kelth very much prefers to HIDE. Kelth does NOT like the vendors that deny their frame access. Does NOT appreciate them. Kelth isn't tall, and they get tired fast, and if they gotta get out of their frame it's already a place where the frame can't go either so they don't have backup of any kind with them except Ordis in their earpiece. Outside of a frame, they're pretty much only comfortable on the Orbiter. Or, if they're alone with just the frame(s) they brought, out in the open, sometimes. The sun & wind & soft ground can feel nice, though Ordis gets on their ass about sunscreen & insect lotion if they stay too long.

Sufford, 8: Do they have any hobbies? Sufford spends a decent chunk of his non-mission time training or meditating, though for fun, (please hold, new lore being generated) he likes drawing. Sometimes, he'll design cool-looking blades, and once or twice he's convinced Ordis to build whatever he made up in the Foundry. Otherwise, it's a lot of landscape & creature drawings. I think he also likes to collect cool small rocks if he can

Sufford, 15: Do they have anything that still ties them back to their days as human? His whole fighting style, to be honest. He's always been a guard, though now he only has one small charge. but now i'm thinking if he perhaps has an Object. i reckon the orokin let him keep his sword if only so they wouldn't have to requisition him a new one. or maybe a portrait of his old family. maybe he had a little sister who he lost track of completely during the old war...

#ALSO. which one of us started hee hoo'ing first. i've been WONDERING. #did you rub off on me or me on you. #or did we both evolve that independently. #THANK YOU FOR KNOCKING MY HEAD DOWN TO THINK MORE ABOUT SUFFORD HE DESERVES IT BUT MY BRAIN IS FULL OF VINCE #my brain keeps trying to go like #excalibur lore? you mean Sad Umbra Thoughts Time? and i keep having to whack it off that course but it's Not Working Very Well #but sufford seems like a guy who used to have a little sister. it's the patience (<- has two little sisters who are also twins and devils) #ask game answers #kelth #sufford

[moonvalecrossing]

Alright, to cap off my "Favorite and Least Favorite" series of questions for Pokemon S/V, let's do one for the Team Star admins (well, Bulbapedia calls them "Bosses", but tbh I don't really care lmao). Since there's only five of them, I think it makes sense to go through them from worst-to-best (or best-to-worst, whichever you prefer).

As you said 'five' I shall not mention my thoughts of Team Star's big boss. The short answer to THAT is 'meh'. I don't even know if anything in here can be counted as spoilers? But just in case TEAM STAR SPOILERS.

I don't hate any of these guys so we'll go least to most favorite. Getting my info on background from Bulbapedia since it's been a hot minute since I played and my brain can only retain information for SO LONG.

5. Eri. The big muscle of the group is a girl and is actually really sweet. The team mom. Pretty yawn. Coolest base location though. Props for that. Why's she bullied? Too great. People jealous. So tough! So good at pokemon! PRETTY LADY. If everyone liked her so much I fail to see how a few jealous mean girls could make any bullying towards her a big enough problem she'd be on the same level as the others.

4. Mela. Meh. Mehhhhh. Another female character in the group with a bully backstory that is amazingly stupid. Someone picked on her because they thought she acted and dressed too cute and got jealous. Hee hoo girls can only be bullied because others are jealous of them. Now she dresses like she fell into a paint bucket at hot topic. Couldn't stop laughing at her goose step walking animation though. If she had an actual shirt of some kind I'd actually like her outfit a lot.

3. Ortega. Okay Bulbapedia has absolutely nothing on this guy's backstory. I'm gonna assume he got bullied because he's clearly a rich baby. Precious rich baby fairy boy I love him and will protect the child WITH MY LIFE. Now if only I could fix that weird ass bowl cut over mostly shaved rest of the hairline thing. Is that a popular look now or something? If it is, kids goddamn I do not want to be cool.

2. Atticus. Bulbapedia's no help here either but dang son if this kid was not bullied because he LARPs like he's gonna die if he doesn't I'd be surprised. Kid is pretty but even I want to gently put him inside a locker and close the door. If he got bullied because he supposedly decended from ninjas and that's somehow weird for him to act and dress like this then ATTENTION DUMBASS CHILDREN OF PALDEA I WOULD LIKE TO INTRODUCE YOU TO KOGA AND HIS DAUGHTER

1.Giacomo. How do I pronounce this name? I've been calling him Guac-omo this whole time. Anyways. The Dark type boss of Scarlet/Violet! Yet another favorite. 10/10 in my school days I would have watched him quietly from a distance like the introverted shy girl I am. This poor fool got bullied because he got to be Class President and made a bunch of hilariously stupid strict rules so they tossed him out and replaced him with Nemona. It's okay Guacboy. I still like you better than female Ash Ketchum over there. NO NEMONA I WAS NOT MAKING EYE CONTACT TO BATTLE PLEASE GO FAR AWAY FROM ME YOU NUT JOB. Also I have no idea what exactly is going on with Giacomo's hair but I like it. Also his name is basically from pinapple. In every language. Hee hoo pineapple boy~

I love Team Star. I would 100% have joined them because I too was bullied as all heck. ...And not just because I would have tried to get near Giacomo. No, no. ...Kinda. Damnit. I'm gonna be making an OC because of this later aren't I. Oh well. ONE MORE ONTO THE PILE!

#Pokemon #Team Star #Moonvale has opinions again

[nutzworth]

obviously the popularization (or should i say tiktokification) of the whole "is he acoustic?" thing is the worst thing in the world especially as neurotypical take it and twist it to hell and back. Unsure if theyre neurotypical actually. but neurotypical enough for their jokes about it to be WEIRD. and like im not diagnosed but you know i have my suspicions. and thats whatever and im always conscious about self diagnosis. ANYWAY.

a few days ago in my psychology class something evil and terrible happened and i keep thinking about it... we;re learning about memory and how it works and theres different kinds of encoding (like putting an experience into memory storage). and theres visual encoding (the look of stuff) and semantic encoding (the meaning of stuff) and ACOUSTIC encoding (the sound of stuff). and when my psych teacher said these 3 types some of the most annoying kids in my class (their asses do not do the homework. brother this is AP. stop cheating on your 4 question reading check quizzes. stop talking to each other when were doing stuff. holy christ.) these kids were like ACOUSTIC! LOL! IS IT ACOUSTIC! TEE HEE! and i was pissed off. commenting that sort of thing on a tiktok post is one thing (as i expect terrible jokes to be there) but you shouldnt bring that into real life. especially not for such a mundane word as acoustic. do you flip your shit if i mention acoustic guitars? whats wrong with you? its the same kind of forbidden that mentioning homestuck at school is. or like danganronpa. or yaoi or other just SO online concepts. you dont bring that sort of thing to our place of LEARNING! HAVE RESPECT!

anyway thats my story. i keep thinking about it. hate these damn kids. i hope they all fail out of the class during finals. theyre literally so evil "psych teacher what do you meeean we have to do homework and reading :-( i dont waaanna im so buuusy cant we do this tomorrow cant we have a work day today instead of doing the fun things youve planned :-(" and like YOURE the one that signed up for the AP CLASS!!!!!!!! boo hoo you cant skip the reading this is COLLEGE. COPE!

all these damn kids have leadership and sports and like 4 ap classes and theyre taking a college class like ok youre burnt out you did it to yourself. cope and seethe or quit some extracurriculars. pretty sure fewer extracurriculars you do good on are better than 1 million extracurriculars you all FAIL. i also recognize i am like the best at doing school nothing truly gets me other than school i love to learn + will crumble in the job force cus im too good at school to be doing anything else but like you know. the least you can do is stop complaining. i wish murder was legal sometimes

#me #long ass ramble #is he acoustic #whatever. me lore drop. im in psychology and i would love it if it was half the class (the half that TRIES.) #these kids rely on favors from the teacher for everything and it sucks. and they get them too #cus the teachers love everyone. they love me + my buddy the most though (we are normal + do our work quietly) #it is a serious ego boost to talk to the teacher about something and theyre like "but you dont have to worry about that. i know you. uoure #youre fine.” im like aah teacher i love you thaaank you. this is why i like my teachers more than my peers. fuck my peers to be real

[ginalinettiofficial]

so i’m going to poop while b2 is nappin. g11mo has been having TERRIBLE separation anxiety the past month or so, so usually if i have to use the bathroom while it’s just us i bring her and a toy in with me so she doesn’t freak. she was playing pretty happily so today i just left the bathroom door wide open so she can get in easily (she’s walking now) and went.

she followed me in (which i expected) with the bag of play scarves. she held it up to me until i opened it. then, instead of playing here, she WALKED ON OUT. okay cool! she’s not feeling anxiety rn, love that for her. assume she’s gonna go play.

well, instead, she starts a lovely little game where she leaves the bathroom, goes out and finds something random (her brother’s sock, a magnet, a ball, her brother’s other sock), and wanders her way back in. she holds up the object for my inspection, i nod, she nods, and then she walks right back out. the most serious face on the whole time. not like “hee hee hoo hoo fun in and out game!”, but like “oh i found something. better go report back to daina, could be important.”

anyways i love my job i love kids they’re so fucking funny

#d speaks #d works

[spookyboywhump]

Hee hoo follow up to This

Not whumpy, just the aftermath of a rescue

CW: Past pet whump, dehumanization, mute whumpee, mentions of branding

***

Elias was nervous about his next case, however, there hadn’t been one so far that didn’t make him nervous. This one, this man had been found in terrible shape, chained up in a pitch black room, shaking and shivering. He was pale and thin, looking as though he hadn’t eaten in some time. He knew he’d been thoroughly examined and given time to rest first, thankfully he’d really just needed some food and water in his system, but now, it was time to actually speak to him and Eli could only hope this would go well.

He’d already talked to one of the people involved in rescuing the man, a person named Lane Thompson. They’d said that he refused to speak to anyone, he seemed scared and distant, which was to be expected of course. So far though, Eli had made good progress with the more reserved ones, Lane even asked him specifically to talk to the man because of that.

He sat across from him now, the man refused to look at him, keeping his dull blue eyes on the table. His auburn hair was messy and unkempt, long enough to fall into his pale freckled face, though he didn’t seem to care to brush it back. He hadn’t said a word, he’d barely even looked at him, but Elias knew he had to at least try to get somewhere with him.

“You… you don’t have to worry about your owner.” He said gently. He knew he wasn’t supposed to refer to them that way, but he also knew it was easier on the victims to use the language they understood- especially one as broken down as this man was. “He can’t hurt you anymore, and I, I want to help you. I know it’s hard but, if you could tell me anything about how you ended up there, or what he did to you, or if there were others, that would be incredibly helpful.”

The man simply shook his head, continuing to stare down at the table. He didn’t even necessarily look scared anymore, he just looked exhausted, defeated even, and it pulled at his heart to see it.

“Can you at least tell me your name…?” He asked. “If- If you can remember your real name that would be great, but, anything I can call you would work…” He said, but once again the man shook his head. He opened his mouth as if he wanted to speak, then thought better of it. He tilted his head up finally, looking Elias in the eye as he gestured to his throat, to a scar resting just above the worn out black collar he wore. He slowly, shakily drew a line across his throat with his finger, and his heart sank as it dawned on him, a threat he’d heard time and time again ringing in the back of his mind. “You… You can’t speak, can you…?” He asked, and the man shook his head.

He almost felt nauseous, but he forced himself to bury that feeling, to focus on the task at hand. He already had a notepad and a pen with him, the latter of which he hesitantly picked up.

“Can you write…?” He asked him, and the man seemed to think about it before nodding, accepting the pen as Eli slid the notepad across the table to him. “Just… write down whatever you can tell me, anything will be fine.” He said, and he nodded in response. He started writing, slow and carefully, like somebody still learning how to write. Elias glanced away while he did so, not wanting to make him feel pressured or anything, his leg bouncing anxiously though.

After some time the man slid the notepad back to him, and Elias took his time to read over the shaky handwriting.

My owner called me mutt. I was given to him when I was 27. I don’t know my age now. First master called me Doll. I don’t remember before that. I can’t speak. I can’t fight. I’m not pretty anymore. I won’t sell for much.

His eyes widened at the last sentence and he quickly glanced up at him, somehow able to stay calm though.

“No, we, we aren’t going to sell you.” He said. “You’re free now, we’re going to help you, okay? We want to get you home, and we want to make sure the people who hurt you can’t do this again to anyone else.” He explained gently, and the man narrowed his eyes, almost suspiciously. Elias saw him glance at the notepad again and he quickly slid it back over to him, watching as he began writing on a new page. It didn’t take long for him to hand it back, that odd look still on his face.

You won’t catch them. They’ll get out of it, they always do. He won’t want me back but his new dog he will. That boy isn’t safe.

“The boy… you mean the other young man that was found there?” He asked. “Do you know his name?” He knew Lane had already spoken with that boy, they were more likely to have gotten answers out of him than Eli would out of this one though- he hated his only options were to calm him “mutt” or “doll”, he sincerely wished he knew his real name.

Owner called him Elle. He said it wasn’t his real name but I don’t know what is. Elias nodded slowly as he read it over, taking a few moments to think about what he should do next. He wanted to ask about their “owner”, he hadn’t been told a lot about him but it was usually difficult to get clear answers out of the victims. After some time, he got to his feet.

“I’ll be right back, I need to talk to someone real quick. If there’s anything you want to tell me just write it down, okay?” He said, and the man nodded, seeming to think about it while he held the pen in hand. Elias left the room, taking a deep breath once he closed the door behind him, before setting off to find Lane.

He didn’t know them particularly well, he didn’t involve himself in the actual rescues just yet, but he knew who they were and the few short interactions they had were pleasant enough he wasn’t too scared to talk to them. After asking around a bit, he found them outside, on a break in the middle of the long day, sitting on a bench and smoking a cigarette. Eli tried to ignore the smell as he approached them.

��Um, Lane, can I talk to you…?” He asked hesitantly. “It’s about that one man you found, the silent one?”

“Yeah, what’s up?” They moved over slightly and Eli sat down next to them, anxiously picking at his fingers. “Has he finally said anything?”

“No, he can’t. He showed me the scar across his throat.” He explained, not even looking up to see their reaction. “He can write though, he seemed worried about the other boy you guys found.”

“Yeah, that kid ain’t doing too great.” They sighed. “He isn’t injured or anything, he just, he wants to go back.” It wasn’t the first time one of the rescues were found that way, it didn’t surprise Eli but it was still odd to think about. “He’s talked up a storm about the guy who had them though, I don’t think he even realizes how much he’s helping.” They laughed softly.

“Has he mentioned any previous owners?” He asked. “This one said he was given to this owner at twenty-seven, but he doesn’t know his age anymore so I’m not sure how old he is now. He doesn’t remember his own name so I’m not sure how well he’ll remember a previous owner…”

“You should try asking anyway. Even if they don’t have a name sometimes they can describe them, might help you figure out something. We’ve been getting enough from the other boy, you should focus on figuring that out, find out the previous owner and maybe you can find out how he got there to begin with.” They said. Eli nodded slowly, they sounded sure of themself and he knew they’d been doing this a bit longer than him anyway.

“Alright, That makes sense… I’ll try that, thank you.” He said, getting to his feet and starting to head back inside, but Lane stopped them after only a few feet.

“Hey, Elias?” They said, and he turned to face them. “If you think you can get away with it, ask him about a brand. Those sick fucks are always branding the poor things.” They said, and Eli had to repress a shiver.

***

The man didn’t look up when Elias entered the room again, he was absentmindedly doodling on the paper. He came and sat down across from him again, thinking over what he wanted to say carefully.

“So… you said that you were given to your owner when you were twenty-seven, right…?” He asked, and he nodded. “Do you remember who did that? Your first owner, do you remember anything about them?” He asked. “If you can, can you describe the way they looked too?” The man seemed to think about it for a moment, before he started writing. This time he wrote for a bit longer, at some points he even seemed to start smiling, something that made Eli nervous, but eventually, he handed the notepad back to Elias.

My master was kinder. He named me Doll, he loved me and I love him. If you can take me back to him I would like that but I don’t think he wants me anymore. He gave me away. He was very handsome, he was tall and he had dark hair and grey eyes. I haven’t seen him in a long time. He lived in a big house and he had a scary dog (not me, a real dog) and he always wore black leather gloves. Please, if you can find him, ask him to take me back.

Elias took his time reading it over, deciding not to tell him he wasn’t going back to an owner again. He had a sick feeling in his stomach, a horrible sense of familiarity, but he forced himself to ignore it.

“Okay… I’m- I’m sorry if this is invasive, you don’t have to answer at all if you don’t want to but did he… did he ever brand you?” He asked slowly, and much to his surprise the man nodded without hesitation. He got to his feet, still shaking noticeably, and gripped the hem of his shirt, pulling it up just enough that Eli could see the F burned into his hip, just above the waistband of the sweatpants he’d been given to replace the ragged clothing he’d been found in. In a way, it was more than enough confirmation for Elias, but he almost hoped it wasn’t true. It was selfish, if it was someone else that would take a longer time to figure out, a longer time to know who was responsible for this, but still, he couldn’t help it.

“Alright, thank you…” He said, and the man sat back down. Elias thought about it before getting his phone out, deciding to give this a shot. It was easy to find a picture of the man, he was well known enough outside of the pet world. He felt sick just looking at him, but he chose to ignore it. “This… this might be a stretch but that description… is that this man…?” He asked, holding out the phone to him so he could see the image of Nicholas Fairfax, and his stomach dropped when the man grinned and nodded.

Somewhere, in the back of his mind, Elias remembered something Nicholas had said to him before.

You remind me of my last pet.

#my writing #my oc’s #Wren #rescue stuff #plot stuff #:3c #pet whump #dehumanization #mute whumpee

[rustdream]

Mustache Kid makes a New Friend hee hoo

Yea! A smol story for @promisedangel‘s roleswap AU! I wrote this at night so some things may be grammatically incorrect. I hope this is good!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The air was full of tension as Mustache Kid stood infront of the ice walls that surrounded her destination. By some sort of miracle, they were perfectly intact, despite the immense heat the forest gave off daily. While it’s a neat discovery all on its own, it would mean that she would have to bust her way in. She was taken out of her thoughts when she heard a chuckle behind her. The voice belonged to none other than the Matriarch, the ruler of Subcon and the pain in the butt that’s been threatening her into doing favors for her. “It’s quite the feat, isn’t it?” The shadowy being asked, floating besides the girl.

Mustache Kid sighed in annoyance, causing the ghost’s angelic features to distort. “Now don’t take that ton with me, child. This will be different than the other favors you’ve done!” The passive aggressive tone had set in, as she feigned cheerfulness. The Matriarch clasped her hands together, “You’ll be delivering a gift to my special Prince for his birthday!” Mustache Kid turned to her as the gift box was born from red flames, the embers forming the luxurious bow. As much as she hated to admit it that box had a pretty darn cool shade of red. “Okay…but why don’t you do it? Since it’s your gift.” Mustache Kid questioned, as the Matriarch’s expression softened. “Oh, how I wish I could give him the gift myself! Unfortunately, my temper had gotten the better of me and…we got into a fight. Now the poor thing’s scared of me.” It was clear that queen of Subcon was being exaggeratingly dramatic right then, as she had no qualms about threatening children with execution twice fold. Still, the kid didn’t have much choice, as the box was shoved into her hands. Mustache Kid had a couple of moments before she realized that her bombs were gone. “Hey!” 

“Oh and, by the way. The Prince is very finicky, so these,” The Matriarch held the bag of bombs in her hands with the heat threatening to set them off, “are out of the question. Now get to it.” As Mustache Kid jumped through the ice pillars infront of her, she could her the cold-hearted monarch say something about burning her if she was to break the box. But she was used to those threats, and there wasn’t much to worry about anyways. She continued, occasionally having to break the walls with the fiery fruits and Dwellers hiding around. Eventually she had made it to the other side of the labyrinth of walls and was immediately hit with the extremely cold weather. She adjusted her cape to cover herself and waded through the thick snow, in the direction of the manor in the distance. When she neared the front porch, she could see glowing yellow eyes peer at her through the attic window for a quick second, before blinking out of sight. Hopefully, this ‘Prince’ wouldn’t be as much as an immoral jerk as the Matriarch was. She went to knock on the door before the wood had turned to ice and being rendered unopenable. Mustache Girl groaned as she kicked an ice statue near, but her attitude quickly changed to fear when said statue came to life and tried to smash her head open. Running from living creatures of cold terror, she had ducked into the cellar in the back and shut the doors. While one might think this wouldn’t stop them from breaking in, it did. In fact, they seemed to leave as soon as the door had locked!

Well, she already made it in the house, might as well deliver it personally. She skidded through the cellar floor, the spilled wine having been frozen over the years. Managing to make it upstairs without busting her bust on the slippery ice, she was relieved to find that the rest of the house’s flooring wasn’t in the same state. Mustache Kid wandered down the hallways, the carpeted floors keeping her footsteps quiet. Suddenly, she had heard the sound of glass breaking coming from the room besides her. In an act of impulse, she opened the door, leading her to the library. There didn’t seem to be anyone in here. A broken vase sure, and an ice sculpture that was whispering to her. Wait. On closer inspection, it was a Wally! Though, he was frozen everywhere but his head. “Hey, Little Mustached Child, why are you here?” He asked, his voice shaky and low. Before she could answer, the air grew darker as footsteps could be heard. “Quick! Hide, Get out of Here!” Mustache Kid wasn’t about to question it, she simply slid under the low bookshelves, the gift box conveniently fitting through with her. Just in time too, as a shadowy figure entered the room. It had the same aura that the Matriarch gave off, but its figure was slightly deformed and monstrous. It was safe to assume that this was the Prince that she was referring to. His yellow eyes scanned the scene, panic present in them. 

His head snapped towards the Wally as the frozen man panicked. “H-hello Best Friend! I was being clumsy and um, knocked it over-” He frantically tried to explain, as the shadow interrupted him. “You promised, you promised that you wouldn’t break any more stuff last time you broke these. You broke my things, gifts to you last week and you said, ‘Wally will fix that’, ‘Wally won’t break stuff again’. But did you live up to that? No nononono, you didn’t you just lied and lied, and you know how I HATE liars.” The Prince ranted, as the ice on Wally’s body consumed more of him. Mustache Kid watched as he was frozen completely and smashed to pieces by this raving lunatic. The shadows mad shrieks soon dissolved into tears, burying his head in his hands. Mustache Kid slowly crawled out of her hiding spot, placing the gift behind the sobbing mess. She then tried to tip toe her way out of the room before a voice stopped her in her tracks.

“Who are you?” The Prince spoke through sobs, as the girl turned to meet his gaze. She seemed to stammer quite a lot, obviously nervous. The royal’s gaze slowly drifted to the nicely wrapped gift between them, the sight swinging his mood straight into a happy delirium. “Did you bring this gift, a gift for me? I’m good enough for gifts?” He asked hopefully, pure joy blooming inside his chest when she had nodded. The Prince chuckled as he suddenly swooped both the box and Mustache Kid in his arms, straight to a bedroom. This caused the kid to become upset, not understanding why he was doing this. But, he simply placed her on a pile of pillows, as he ‘sat’(more along the lines of coiled on) the bed with the gift in his lap. As he tore open the wrapping, Mustache Kid looked around to determine her situation. Everyone but the two of them were frozen solid. Some of them are seals, cats, a lot of them Wallies. “Great, this might as well happen.” She mumbled, as she heard the Prince gasp in surprise. Well, she’s kind of stuck here, might as well find out what the gift was!

A pile of bacon. That was literally it. It wasn’t even good, all of it was charred to crispy charcoal. However, the Prince was very happy to receive this gift. He started scarfing it down quickly, as if as soon as he stopped it would be all gone. He then froze up suddenly. He could hear them. His friends, they were hungry too. They deserved this gift more than he did, and he’s just hogging it like the selfish friend he is. He doesn’t deserve such a nice thing as this, with how horrid he was being. Of course, Mustache Kid didn’t hear any of that. She just looked on in confusion as the Prince went around the room, trying to shove bacon down the ice statues’ throats. Though that went as well as you’d expect it to, as it either fell out (with the Prince eating it anyways) or it just stayed in the mouths of the frozen creatures around him. He made it to Mustache Kid, offering her a handful of burnt bacon. “Oh um, no thanks. I’ve already. Eaten on the way here you know and, snacks aren’t my thing?” She refused, thoughts of an elaborate escape plan flooding through her mind. The Prince sat back on the bed, facing away from everyone as he consumed the rest of the food on his plate. After he was done, he turned to Mustache Kid and held her hands in his freezing cold hands. “Thank you, thank you, thank you for this wonderful gift. I’ll cherish it, I’ll love it. Never forget it, thank you new friend!” He repeatedly thanked her, his breath hitching as he started to mumble incoherently to himself. He then stood upright, seeming to have snapped back into reality. “It seems like it’s getting dark! None of you, none of you are leaving, r-right? GOOD! Good, I guess that means that we can have a slumber party. You – YOU will join us, won’t you New Friend?” He asked the child, as ice started to form on her legs.

Mustache Kid sat on the pillow pile on the floor, bored out of her mind. Since her bombs are gone and this guy can freeze her in an instant, fighting her way out is out of the question. So is straight up running for the exit. For now, she just has to play along with it. However, the only entertainment right now was watching him start up conversations with the frozen people besides him. And even then it wasn’t really funny. Just sad. She would perk up whenever he spoke to her though. Mainly because he could kill her if she didn’t answer. “Oh, sure! I agree! No way!” After a long while of talking, the Prince stood up. “Okay everyone! I’ve gotten everything prepared for tonight! A nice view, snacks…wait. No, no snacks??” His head rotated 180 degrees (grossing the kid out a bit), facing the empty table meant for housing the refreshments. How could he forget? He should have thought this through! He has a new friend he needs to impress, and this is his first impression? A forgetful dumb stupid idiot who disappoints everyone he meets? He could feel the hateful stares burn up as he backed out of the room. “I’m, I’m going to go get the, snacks. Friend! New Friend, can you come with me?” He practically tugged Mustache Kid out of the room, and downstairs into the kitchen. 

Mustache Kid gathered up what small amount of treats she could find in the abandoned cabinets on the table, as the Prince got ready the tea. A couple of crackers, and some preserved fruits. She turned to the Prince, who was shaking as he continuously stirred the tea. At the very least, he was a lot nicer than the Matriarch. “Not many snacks…are there?” She questioned, more out of concern for how he’s been living all this time. While she figured that ghosts don’t need to eat to live, it seemed to cause the Matriarch pain when she missed a meal, imagine living with only this. The Prince put the tea kettle on the tray, along with the cups, before answering. “Hang on, there’s more, I’ll get them.” He walked hurriedly to a hollow spot in the walls, before sliding it aside to reveal some bigger snacks, such as a bag of fish chips of the CC brand and a slice of velvet jelly cake. All of it seems to have been frozen to last, the velvet jelly was absolutely solid when he placed it on the table. Mustache Kid grabbed the snacks, as the Prince carried the tea tray upstairs. “By the way, I’m sorry for being so forgetful. It’s really awful on my part, I hope you can forgive me.” He told her, as they set the tea and snacks down. Of course she’d forgive him, it’s not like he has anything he needs to apologize for.

The night seemed to have gotten better. The two were now talking about law, and frankly hearing about this planets views on justice and law enforcement was pretty interesting. Until he got into the nitty gritty details of it. Not that it was boring, it was just the simple fact that they have all these policies and fallacies and such. But it isn’t complex! There are bad people who need to be arrested, like the Matriarch, whole there are good people who arrest the bad, like herself! Still, she listened intently to his rambles about law theory. Something the Prince isn’t used to! Usually when he rambles to people, they ignore him. It always made him feel like he didn’t matter but when he asked Mustache Kid if she was listening she actually responded! Mustache Kid took a sip of her tea, and grimaced. The tea was ice cold. Which was understandable since the person who made the tea could freeze things with his bare claw hands. But there was also the fact that she actually wasn’t a tea person. The Prince caught on to this. “Is there something wrong? Is it not good enough? I’m sorry I’ll make a new kettle if you hate it-“

 “It’s good, it’s okay!” Mustache Kid assured him, almost becoming numb from the ice that had formed up to her knees. It was thin, luckily. She placed a hand on the Prince’s shoulder as he calmed down. “Oh, I’m sorry I just got worried and…” He eventually stopped talking as he leaned into her arms, humming as she petted his head. He liked this, it’s nice. She’s nice. Most of his other friends didn’t hug him like that, they didn’t even tell him nice things. He’s heard of BFFS, Best Friends Forever. Maybe people that nice are BFFs? The Prince never had enough friends to tell. He’ll need to hide her from Vanessa. She’ll come and burn him again, and maybe even burn his new BFF like everything other bit of happiness he hoarded. He didn’t want to think of that. Whenever he did his mind devolved into this dark place he can’t get out of. “So what’s the next event on our list of fun?” Mustache Kid asked, distracting the Prince from his thoughts. “A dance.”

#ahit #a hat in time #swap au #the prince #mustache kid #ahit au #ahit swap au #the matriarch

[mamichigo]

and a donald duck for the road B]

You’re ridiculous and I’ll answer this anyway bc I can and also I know that what we both want it

First impression:

Dude, that was like, what? When I was three? Who knows what baby Mandy was thinking about Donald Duck, probably hee hee hoo hoo duck

Impression now:

He is just... soft. And angry. But soft. He just loves his children (his nephews AND Sora if we include Kingdom Hearts), he’s just trying to be the voice of reason so the kids won’t fucking die. A father figure. He comes into my room at night and tucks me in.

Favorite moment:

When he does the classic angry stomp thing, absolutely iconic, a mood. Also when he uses the strongest spell in square enix lore and somehow survives, imagine being a duck and having that much power

Idea for a story:

Riku knocked on the door frame to Donald’s room with no small amount of reluctance, especially when Donald was immersed in whatever he was writing on a piece of paper. As soon as he knocked, though, Donald stopped and looked at Riku with equal amounts of uncertainty.

“Yes?” Donald said.

Riku shuffled from one foot to the other. “King Mickey said I should talk to you?”

In all the years Riku spent dreaming of leaving the Destiny Islands, he never thought he’d be seeking emotional advice from a duck, and yet here he was.

Unpopular opinion:

If you say he’s not nice and isn’t trying his best and also is full of love I will literally cry and then smasha you with a rock

Favorite relationship:

Every single time he's in the general vicinity of José and Panchito I ascend to another plane of existence. I will stop everything I’m doing to watch an episode of all three of them together.

Also I have no reason for this but I love anything that has him and Mickey interacting, my brain just goes back to being baby Mandy like hee hee hoo hoo duck and rat

Favorite headcanon:

He’s prone to baking cookies any time, anywhere if there’s a child/teen around. He could be working, but if you ask him nicely enough he WILL make them. It’s his calling. He must bake cookies. He must provide for the children.

#donald duck #riku #kh #headcanons #ask games #long post

[lordxgrinnyxboy]

&& watching tgm for the umpteenth time - most of act one

not related to anything specific but DAEMON AU Mojo is Ursus’ Daemon, Dea’s is a bird of some sort, Gwyn’s never Settled

Ms. Brisson’s “lords on palace hill” character appreciation checkpoint. first time i watched i thought that was a whole child but nope it is SHE

Ms. Brisson’s Stokes-Croft Faire character appreciation checkpoint

Ms. Obianyo’s Stokes-Croft Faire character appreciation checkpoint

Every Ms. Obianyo character appreciation checkpoint

one of my favorite parts of Laughter is the Best Medicine is when Bark’s doing his “BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEST” with the drawn-out note and Ms. Obianyo’s just. Staring at him the entire time but then he finishes the note and Mr. Maskell’s character just gives him this quick little  glance before the beat drops

The archbishop is the wolf’s head and i think that’s pretty neat

reckon whether Gwyn ever feels some kinda way about the Curtain. With the Grinning Man logo on it. Can they see that in-universe?

i love how bored Ursus seems as he starts to tell the story

also still finding it weirdly endearing how that panel just refuses to go down and Ursus has to do it

Unrelated but Cat Norrell is having his morning nap at the end of my bed and he makes these little whiffles every now and then and curls his lil paws and he is very Soft and Cute

thinking about how since we’re first introduced to them within a performance we don’t actually meet the ‘real’ Gwyn and Dea until like 50 minutes into the show

Also thinking about how we kinda skip the ‘ordinary day’ trope like...we don’t get to see what Gwyn’s like (or many of the other characters) pre-breaking point and therefore have to kind of guess

idk why i just really love the posing when Ursus pulls back the curtains

Dirry-Moir’s face on “and these few lucky strangers” tho

ah. it’s Ursus who says “twenty years ago” while Barkilphedro says “almost exactly twenty years ago”. gotcha.

Quake’s really just out here patrolling i guess. “LONG LIVE THE KING”

“in the far south west”  so...oklahoma....

“My son, give him to me-!” “There’s something wrong with his face” you th- you think she doesn’t know, dude?

the lil “no. no.” when they demand to see his face DX

it really looks like the captain almost let him aboard, then changed his mind. kinda like how ursus almost helped him but then changed his mind

Gwyn: “I’ll remember you my whole life long” Ursus: “I shall soon change that”

i love the pause after “through snow and sorrow” where Ursus makes sure to get More Money from Dirry-Moir. i wonder if he pulls this every time they perform or if it’s New

can we stop and even just Appreciate that Gwyn’s even functional enough at this point to walk around in the snow and pick up a baby and keep going, within at most a couple days and as little as a few hours after having his face cut like that, no pain meds to speak of....kid’s a Determinator

BABY NOISES

i know he says “heart” but i always hear “your little hat can find out what it means” and then i’m sad that Gwyn doesn’t actually have a hat

okay but if he wound up in the place where the rebels against King Clarence were hanged that means that unless Barkilphedro took him to a secondary location to cut him, he actually wandered right back to where it all initially happened which ofc has to be taken with a grain of salt since this is Ursus’ version of the story rather than an actual memory but still. if his dad’s corpse is there that means this is also where he was cut.

“They cannot stay here. It’s too dangerous” aye mainly dangerous in that kidlet over there could recognize you and be like “AHHHH!” and then you’d have some explaining to do

“ice tears fell from her eyes” what does that mean Ursus

no but fr “it’s too dangerous” is an interesting choice of phrase

i mean clearly they’ve heard Beauty and the Beast before at some point since Dea picks out the exact puppets and also starts off with “I see you are, said the wicked witch” before reminding Ursus that he’s supposed to be the Wicked Witch and oh my god foreshadowing?? “YOU’RE the wicked witch” hhhhhhhhh

i genuinely love how both kids actually giggle when Ursus agrees to tell the story

The facial expressions from Mr. Angell when Mojo pounces on Ursus :3

oh sh on the note of “we don’t meet the real Gwyn and Dea until about 50 minutes in” it just now hit me how Ursus omits the fact that Gwyn has to keep taking the Crimson Lethe, completely leaves out Gwyn’s recurring pain from the story he tells the audience.

the way they bow before the dance gets me every time

how at the start of their little duet both Gwyn and Dea are making these faces like they’re so confused and a little frightened even

genuinely love Dea’s expressions through the entire thing like Wow

the way when Gwyn touches her face Dea does that tiny laugh and grabs his wrist with both hands

and then he directs her to look toward his face and i mean she can’t look at his eyes but her face at this part i’m weak

after the first kiss Gwyn does that little head motion he tends to do during a nerve attack, just that quick little jerk he sometimes does. ive noticed it before but it’s still like “oH?” every time

the way he looks out at the audience during the hug tho

THE LITTLE SWAY DURING THE SPOON HUG

legit love how Dea does the “given me life” she’s so cute she’s so cute

love how Osric seems just as invested in this show as Dirry-Moir does

Also I Want Osric’s Coat

straight-up just mistook archbishop kupsak for a banana. i’m sorry, archbishop kupsak. i know you are not a banana, but your outfit does kinda look like

they literally put a scythe in the commemorative window

Angelica is babey and i love her send tweet

i would love to know how the writers set about the world building. what is up with “HEE! HOO! HA!” what is the system here

anyway “La Fleur de Jambon” translates to either “the flower of ham” or “the ham flower”

i love Angelica so much

i think it’s interesting how Josiana says she detests the notion of marriage with all her head. usually it would be “with all my heart”

Jojo’s costume is one of my handful of complaints i just. i don’t Like it.

lbr minus the incest and fetishization “I Have Never Seen A Face Like This” is basically all of us trying to get everyone we know to watch this musical

would love to know the writing process regarding the Scorching Thoughts like Dea What Do You Mean also Gwyn just. asking if she thinks they’re ever going to make it to the new world. Stuff Is Already Happening Like Wow

she forgives him real quick but ngl Dea does look genuinely hurt in the feelings when Gwyn first snaps at her

the lil headshake when Ursus says “take your medicine”. Gwyn’s fully allergic to taking medicine on command

kay but Dirry-Moir saying “somebody” drowned instead of. i mean it would be an awkward fit for him to shuffle in an explanation of the whole story but still

Gwyn’s trying so hard to keep it together but he is all out of glue

 heck i was gonna try to go all the way through act one but my wifi just noped out. >:{

#tgm #the grinning man

[ofieugogyshz]

Fic: Let Me Count the Ways

This is what happens when inspiration strikes in the strangest of ways!!! I actually DID write a set of poems back in seventh grade, when I first fell for this redhead champion, and boy oh BOY were they.... Works. But I’ve kept them over the years. Mostly for posterity; I have not looked at them since maybe a year or two after writing them, to the point that I actually MISPLACED where I had put them?! Such important memories; literal landmarks! Had it not been for these, I’m not sure I would have had a marker of my rapid decline into true fangirling....

tl;dr hee hoo wee woo gremlin brain laughs at a single line on a post and then runs wild with imagination.

---

“Hey, honey, what's this?”

Lance had come over to help you organize your stuff; and while you were much more capable of focusing on smaller sections, he had taken over organizing your papers, while directing you to tidy up your desk.

You turn back to look at him, curious at what had caused him pause. And then your heart dropped. Eyes widen. You knew instantly from the aging sheet, far older than you, scribbled on with ink partially younger than you. Perhaps, just as old as...

Seeing your initial response, he raised an eyebrow and glanced at what was written on it in eye-searingly bright sky blue gel pen, a relic of an era long gone. Quick as a flash, you started to yell, “NO NO DON'T READ IT”, but it was too late. Far worse than any “edgy” poetry you had been known for in high school. Rather... it was something you had never shown him, nor ever had any intention to, simply because it was faaaar too embarrassing.

Kill me now, you thought, watching with despair as his eyes scanned the page. Or, rather, tried to scan, as thankfully the bright blue gel pen did not mesh well with the yellowed sheet that you had written it on at the time. But that only made it worse, for that meant that one had to spend much, much more time and effort in trying to read it, and that, my friends, is how the words scrawled as neatly as you could at that age, could be seared into one's memory.

It did not take your shout for him to realize what it was; it was the hand over the mouth as he tried not to laugh. You found yourself wanting to die, wanting to disappear and never be found again. This was it. You could never face him again. Nothing compared, not any terrible thing you had done, no terrible thought, not even the lashing out in pain and anger and depression, no fanfic or angsty childhood poem ever written before could compare. There was no coming back from this. Your mind zipped through a thousand different ways to escape, to hide, knowing that nothing could take this back. All you could do was watch, horrified, as his eyes attempted to scan the paper for its contents.

He had found those “love poems” you wrote when you first fell for him in 7th grade.

You groaned loudly. A prolonged, agonizing noise, uttered from the depths of your soul that you did not know you still had.

“Please kill me,” you muttered, shoulders sinking as you tried to make yourself, a large person with a large presence, small. “I don't... I don't want to know. I wrote those when I was a dumb kid, and I didn't know what I was doing, and it's not like I was serious at the time anyways, I was just trying to 'fit in' with the narrative of what I should have been doing at the time, and oh my god why are you still reading those PLEASE PUT THOSE DOWN AND DON'T YOU DARE LOOK AT ME.”

You don't even know what happened between the first page and second, where the eye-searing sky blue gel pen had now been replaced by an even brighter baby pink, whose words you could only read at an angle, for the light somehow reflected off of it and hit your cornea in just the wrong, most painful spot. How ironic that these two poems, which foretold of your doom seventeen years ago, would also hurt to look at physically. He had to hold the page back for the second one and tilt it until he could read it, and the laughter he tried to stifle only added to your agony. But the third page. Oh.... The third page was when you decided the first two pens were a bad idea to write with, and instead went for the plain and simple graphite pencil on a fresher, brighter, lined white sheet of wide-ruled paper.

A primal instinct of fear overtook you. You had somehow managed to wipe from your memories the words on these poems; all that you remembered was writing three different poems, and showing the first two to your equally embarrassed friend group back in junior high, which consisted of one just as embarrassing enabler, two boys who probably didn't know what to make of it, and a fourth person who you were very sure hated you at the time, but was best friends with the first one. You did not know shame from these poems at a young age, only their embarrassing nature.  But once you saw the ease that one could read the third page, you lunged. Eager and desperate to get them out of his hands, trying so hard not to tear apart the precious and simultaneously excruciatingly mortifying memory.

In your haste, however, you had forgotten the mess you had made around you from your attempt to tidy. A crack of something underfoot, while your ankle ran into something else, and you stumbled towards his general direction, saved from falling only by your equilibrium being capable of righting itself much better than it ought to. But that action, combined with the blanched fear and desperation and the utter embarrassment, only served to pop the bubble of laughter that Lance had been holding back.

“I'm- I'm so sorry,” he said, between laughs. “But you literally wrote 'Lance is hot' in this one,” he said, holding up the third sheet.

You whined and groaned, unable to decide which noise you wanted to make. Your face, though despaired, flashed hot, and you just couldn't figure out how to respond to that one any better than you could exist, at this very moment, in this very room, with your husband finding perhaps The One Most Embarrassing Thing of your youth. Perhaps your very life. So you turned away and covered your face, whining.

“Don't- don't remind me!!!” But at least that was one of the better lines, you knew, [because at least that one was true]. But your reaction only added fuel to the flame; you knew he'd take the chance to fluster you, and you still couldn't help but react the way you did.

“ 'My love for Lance has grown by leaps and bounds',” he began, and you knew death was imminent. “ 'I'd hurt anyone who'd call him a hound'. Now, who would call me a hound anyways--”

“shUT UP. I was twelve. Or something. I WAS TRYING TO RHYME.” You said, finding yourself defending your youth's word choices, even if those choices left a lot to be desired.

“ 'To me, Lance is hot'--”

“UGGHHHHHH I was twelve, I didn't know what the fuck 'hot' actually meant, I thought it was something you used --- you know what nevermind I'm not even going to finish what I thought it meant”

He arched an eyebrow at the next line, “ 'He's everything these earth boys are not'. What, am I an alien?”

“SHUT UP!!!” You said, grabbing a nearby plush and chucking it at him. He laughed, blocking it with an arm and ducking his head. You lunged again, this time with only a bit more success at getting near enough for him to hold the papers up high as you tried to wrestle them from him.  

“Gods damn your height...” you muttered, debating pushing him aside as you just. Glared at his teasing look, his blue eyes mischievous. But you didn't want to hurt him, so you pouted and glared, only to feel bad for glaring at him and having thrown the plush. But once the attempt at a withering look weakened, his eyes went from you back to the paper.

“I seem to have lost my spot....”

“GOOD.”

His eyes scanned the sheet, and you felt your cheeks flame up, knowing that he was still reading it. “Oh, here seems to be a good spot to continue--”

“FUCK”

He laughed as he put an arm around you, holding you close as a gesture of love, but you knew it was also to keep you from trying to lunge at the papers again.... You pouted, crossing your arms and biding your time as you wondered the best way out of this now.

“ 'To me, my life is incomplete. It's hard to keep the beat--”  another groan from you as you remembered yet another spot where you forced a rhyme. “ 'See, without him/ I can't do much of anything'. Aw, that's not true--”

“Shut,” you growled. Maybe if you used your weight to pull down his arm....

“ 'How many parts this poem has, I cannot tell / These poems come from my love well.'” He paused here, trying to make sense of what you wrote. “Love well? As in you love well or---”

“The latter,” you groaned.

“That's adorable.”

“That's not.” You began to reach for the arm that held your 7th grade scrawl, trying to pull it down with all of your weight, but he shifted and your hands slipped. “Damnit.”

His hand flipped the sheet, and he looked at the last lines in a quick silence. A little concerned, you pulled away, wondering if you had written something that actually did offend him somehow. But your mind couldn't recall a single word of the poem. It was only with recitation, with the words before you, could you remember anything about the creation process, and you looked again between the sheet and him.

“What? What is it?” Your eyes scanned the childish scrawl, which had become more hasty as the poem ended. You remember writing the ending in a haste, but.. why? What for? Was it during a break or meal period?

And I have one remark to add... That a line in part one states... I wanted to add a line, I suppose / It's cause I love him so.

You blinked at the words. There was a crossed out line, but it was mostly just the last line written again, and everything else was as well as it could be, for what the poem was.

“Was there something wrong with how I ended it?” You asked, pausing a moment. “Its existence aside, I mean.”

Another pause. He cleared his throat.

“Did you always.... want to marry me?” he asked suddenly, and you felt your cheeks burst into flames, hotter than any other embarrassment the last several moments had provided.

“EH!?!?!?!?” Your eyes grew wide and you began to squirm, unsure of what to say, especially in regards to the subject at hand. “I- what? What does-- Lance, I-” you sputtered, unable to figure out anything right now. Your mind went blank, only the fading sense of embarrassment from the poems keeping you aware that this moment was real.

Suddenly aware of your discomfort, he quickly tried to fix it. “Ah, it's just that-- Your lines here,” he said, pointing towards the last bit you had hurriedly rushed through earlier.

You cautiously skimmed through it again, reading the same thing as before. “....Yeah?”

“ 'I didn't know why, but I wanted to end a line with propose, I suppose'.”

.

.

.

Silence.

Had there been an analog clock, you would have heard its ticking loudly.

Ticking away the seconds.

Ticking away time.

Ticking away the moment, until... When...

You felt heat rise off your entire body. Face, head, shoulders. Nothing in your head. Your hands began to tremble.

“I-I-I-I...”

“You...”

“w-w-wuh....”

“Uh-huh....”

You slumped to the floor, utterly defeated. You.... You didn't remember that. But the more you looked it over, looked at the papers, the lines that you had hastily scribbled down, the 'with propose I suppose' seeming like a line you forgot to scratch off half of, vague memories of the poems coming back, of making choices....

“OH. GOD.”

Lance knelt beside you, unsure of how to react to your apparent defeat. He didn't mean to cause you this much distress in teasing.

“Just.... end me..... please......”

“I'm sorry, Sarah, I didn't mean to take it that far.”

You feebly waved a hand at him, it looking like a white flag as you stayed on the floor, crumpled in embarrassment. “It's fine........ I didn't remember what anything on these poems were like, except for a thing or two.........” You felt his hand on your head, soothing strokes as you tried to speak through embarrassed sobs.

“Are you sure?”

“Y-yeah....” You rolled onto your side, the petting slowly bringing you down from the adrenaline high of the otherwise mortifying experience.

“Why did you even have these in there loose? I would have thought you had them in your art folder....” Which, ideally, would be the place you would store anything you had remotely considered to be, at the time, intentionally done as art. ….Which also may have been the reason why they weren't, but it was too late to worry about it now. The damage had been done, and now you were having an out-of-body experience, in that you were still trying to leave this moment and never come back.

“YEAH, no kidding. I think past me wanted to play a cruel joke on future me.....”

“They certainly succeeded in that.” He sighed, placing his hand on your cheek. “Are you sure your okay? Because I can give these to you to put away.”

You narrowed your eyes, suspicious. “You say that like you were going to continue....”

He shook his head. “Not anymore.”

You quickly sat up and snatched the papers from his hands, rifling through the three sheets, wondering where the fuck you were going to put that one line and just how bad the other two poems were.

“Hey!”

“Shh.” You leaned against him, the silent signal understood immediately as he sat down on the floor and wrapped his arms around you. He rested his chin on your shoulder, looking apologetic. “I really am sorry,” he said again, but you just pat his cheek with your free hand. “I know.”

He kissed your cheek, and you nuzzled him back in acknowledgment.

You flipped to the first one, with the eye-searing sky blue, and winced. How did something over fifteen years old manage to stay so bright, much less on such yellowed paper? You blinked a few times, shifting until the ink was readable for me.

You felt Lance wince beside you. “What made you think this color was such a good idea to write a love poem in?”

“They were gel pens and they were new,” you told him, eyes adjusted and reading the poem. You started to snicker at the first stanza, because, oh stars, was it still true to this day.

“He's cool, he's daring, but that's his job,” you began, speaking as though you were the proud poet. Now you the one trying to hold back your own laughter. “Of course, I don't know his dob.”

Now it was his turn to groan at the horrible poetry. “Why did you rhyme it with d.o.b.?”

“Because my thesaurus wasn't a rhyming one.”

“You had a rhyming thesaurus?” he asked, even more confused.

“No, a spelling dictionary, but my point remains that I didn't have a rhyme lookup book of some sort.”

He just shook his head and laughed, nuzzling you as you carried on.

“ 'Why I like him, I don't know why / But he's the fighter of my eye.' Aww, babe, look. I knew you so well after just one day.”

“You're a dork.”

“Takes one to know one.”

“I know, I know.”

You scanned the next few lines, trying to hold back a barking laugh. “ 'He's a cool guy, I don't lie/ for he's famous worldwide./ Now I know his favorite type of Pokemon, / don't get me wrong--”

“Hey, you didn't rhyme on the next line”

“I gave up. I think.” You hastily scanned through, finding anything else fun to point out, until-- “OH SHIT, HAHAHA. Oh my gods there it is. There is the line.”

“That's why you wanted to sit here and read this after all of that? Just to find that one line--”

“Why are you expecting anything less of me?”

“...Did you really rhyme my name with 'advance'?” he squinted at the paper, hand reached out to tilt it to visibility for him.

“SHOOSH.”

You guys had gotten to the end of the paper, and you double checked that there was nothing on the backside before setting it down to the side. There was a strange feeling of uncertainty, having found these poems again, let alone having someone whose eyes were never meant to find them. Lance picked up the stack that you had set down, flipping over to the near-impossible pink one.

“What does this one say?”

You shrugged. “I dunno.”

He tilted the paper back and forth, trying to find a way to read it. “How did you even write this...?”

“You're asking the one with memory issues to tell you how they remembered writing a love poem that they somehow managed to wipe the contents of from their mind despite the apparent retention of its existence?”

“...Yes.”

“Fuck if I know.” You grabbed the paper from him, holding it out as the baby pink gel pen had effectively blended in with the yellow paper somehow.

“Is that my cousin's name on there?” he asked, reaching out once more for the paper. But you shrugged it away, knowing that if you had somehow brought up her name in this, that this poem had to have been bad.

“Don't!” You swatted at his hand playfully. “Let me read it first. Authors first.” After a bit of tilting and holding it up in different light, you managed to find a way to skim it.

“Nah, it's nothing.” You tossed it aside gently. Even if these poems were an instrument of torture, they were still an important part of you and your memories. You couldn't just risk it getting torn up; that might hurt more than if you had to recite this to a stadium full of people. It was a sign that you had lived. You may have been a little quirky, a little weird and over-performative at times, but you were still there, you still had thoughts and feelings, and you still did your best to understand them. You couldn't disrespect your old art like that, even if you were hesitant to call the poems 'art'.

“Nothing like the other poems were nothing?”

“Nothing like actual nothing.”

“Hmm....”

“What, I'm not lying!”

He grinned at you, hugging you tight. “ 'Cuz I'm a cool guy and I'm famous worldwide?” he added without missing a beat. “And you know my favorite type of Pokemon--”

“OH MY GOD”

You hastily tried to scramble away from him, but he had his arms around you. Pulling you back in, you let out a squealed laugh as he held you down.

“And you really really want to end your lines with propose?”

“I swear to all that is holy, if you do NOT stop reciting my stupid poetry from seventh grade, I will hit you with a pillow.” You playfully tugged away, only to be pulled back in. You looked at each other, both of your faces flushed with teasing at the childish words shared between the two of you.

“But, you know, I did propose. What would you write then?” He paused, looking up in the air as he thought for a moment. “I wonder, did you ever write anything else?”

“Alas, no, my fair prince, I found you far too distracting once I had gotten to know you. Who could ever write wistful poetry, when they had the real deal before them?”

“The real deal?” he laughed.

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.”

“You don't even remember the rest of that one.”

“You don't know that!”

“Then how's the rest of it go?”

“Um.... You know what, that's not the point right now!”

“And, pray tell, what is, my darling?”

“That you're married to one hell of a poet. A real prince of poetry. ...Hm... if I'm a hell of a poet, and a princely poet, does that make me a Hot Poetry Prince? Am I the one who deals out hot poems like rappers deal out hot beats?”

He shook his head at you, sighing. “You are very bad at this.”

“Yeah, well, look at what you married.”

“Someone who I love very much; and who has loved me for far longer than either of us imagined.”

Your face flushed red at his words, and you looked away, indignant. “Yeah, well, way to kill my jokes.”

“I love you, but your jokes are dead to begin with.”

“I am going to hit you with a pillow. Because I love you and do not want to hurt you, but also I want to hit you with a pillow very much right now.”

#pokemon self shipping #pokemon self ship #hot poetry prince #im keeping that okay #- #--- #-- #writing #my writing #ahhhhh embarrassment of the childhood revealing kind #please tumblr be kind when posting this........

[concentrateandpush]

Abandoned building

"I know some of you may think it's crazy going to an abandoned building to film a YouTube video whilst 37 weeks pregnant.. but I cant let my 2.3 mil subscribers down! Plus it should be super safe! I mean, theres an open door right where we park, so not long to walk and straight in! No climbing!" Said Kat to her viewers whilst sat in the back of Poppy's car. There were 6 people in total, Kat and Joe, the mommy and daddy to be, Poppy, Kats best friend. Then Corey, Daniel and Dave, the guys who Kat wanted to collab with, they knew each other from elementary but hadn't been close for a long time, Joe and Poppy didnt know them at all.

She had noticed that morning that she wasnt feeling great and it seems that the morning sickness had come back, but she agreed to do this video so she persisted and hey! She had her boyfriend with her after all. Kat and Joe had been together a long time and it was about time they should have a baby, Joe was thrilled, Kat was too but she still felt she could take on the world whilst carrying a human.

They agreed that Poppy would drive seeing as Kat was 37 weeks pregnant and felt uncomfortable driving now. They arrived at the abandoned building as it was going dark, Joe wasnt at all phased by spirits but the rest were hyped and ready to go.

'Hey man, I'm Daniel"

"Joe, nice to meet you"

Joe could instantly tell Daniel was a jerk. At this point in time, whilst everyone was setting up cameras, Poppy chatted to Kat whilst having a smoke.

Kat made sure that nobody was around and quickly said to Poppy "Pops, dont tell Joe, I've been having twinges all morning, I'm super nauseous and I think theres a pattern in the pain, I dont want to tell him because he already cant believe I've come here 9 months pregnant"

Poppy exclaimed "Yeah I'm not surprised, look, videos can wait, let's go back to your apartment and order uber eats, I dont think its wise to stay here" and quickly, Kat snapped "I wont be able to come back here for a long time and I need to film this video, were like 3 hours from home now anyway so let's just film".

It's been a few hours and they had filmed the majority of the scheduled videos. Kat is exhausted at this point and hasn't suffered in pain too much, but she has noticed her belly getting heavier and harder through out filming. They get ready to call it a night and hear a noise from outside, young people, they sound rough and ready to fight.

Daniel whispers "Boys we have to run out, Joe, you up for running out? Girls?"

"I cant run" Kat exclaims, but Joe cuts across her quickly "You expect my 9 month pregnant girlfriend to run out of here, she could trip on anything for starters and -"

Kat starts to feel a lot of pressure and breathes it through but it doesnt go unnoticed, Poppy feels that she has to disclose information "Joe she has felt twinges all day and didnt want to tell you because -"

"Who's in here then? Who's up for a fight?!" Sounds from the outside.

"Okay, everyone shut the fuck up, Daniel phone the police, Joe, an ambulance, nobody argue with me, I need to get out of here" whispers Kat "I've kept this tiny person safe for 9 months, I am not messing it up now, I will not put myself and my child at risk of those kids outside, were in a bad area and they might have weapons so we -"

Joe interrupts "Love, we didnt bring phones, it interferes with the tech"

Kat looks at Joe tearfully and says "Okay well it'll have to happen in here then, I'm in so much pain, I need something to sit on, a jumper or?.."

At this point, Poppy has had enough "Right you three get out there, you do not tell them were in here, it was your idea not to bring phones in and now look where you got us"

Daniel slams back "Mate, your friend wanted to be here even though she cant even walk shes so pregnant, Joe you should never have left her come, you're both going to be parents and cant even- "

"Ahhh, hee hoo hee hoo, please shut up I need to focus, please just shut up" said Kat, "I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry, okay can I check you? I just need to check how far along you are" said Joe whilst signaling to Poppy that she should come over and help. Joe pulls Kats maternity jeans off and then her panties, the three other boys are stood watching, "never seen a vagina before you pervs?" Shouted Poppy. Kat moans as Joe puts his fingers in, "You're nearly there Kat, you're going to have to push her out in here" he says panicking "I cant" says Kat, "it's dirty and ngghh"

Corey whispers to Daniel "Nah mate, we have to tell her" Joe hears and shouts "Tell her what?!" Daniel laughs and mutters "it's a prank pal, theres nobody outside, it's just the rest of the boys, you need to get her out of here". Joe springs up off the floor and runs towards Daniel "You f*cking what? I'm going to break that pretty face of-"

"I need to push, please, help me" Kat cries, Joe is torn, after a second thought he falls to his knee and pulls Kats legs open and says, "Okay whenever you feel it's right, push as hard as you can" Kat takes a huge breath and presses her chin down on her chest to push and Poppy says "Stop, let's get her to my car, I have blankets and stuff, we can help her birth there, its safer". Huffing and puffing through out, Kat screaches "I cant walk, I can feel the head I need to push her out now, I have to push, I cant hold it anymore".

"Come on, let's get up, get to the car and get this baby out safely" Joe orders, Kat always listens to Joe because he always does what's best. Kat finds the strength to get on her toes, with Joe's hand and Poppy supporting her lower back, once on her feet she stops and takes a moment "hee hoo hee, AHH I cant, I need to push, urrrrggggg", Joe gets on his knees and kisses her bump, "we can get to the car".

Poppy runs ahead, "you can do this Kat you're the strongest person I know" she exits quickly to puff and prod some blankets so that Kat can bare down on them. Whilst Kat waddles out with Joe's support under her elbows "Not long now Mommy, she'll be here".

Kat gets in the car and quickly tries to find a position to push in, but becomes frustrated because she cant find the power to push "I need to squat" she begins pushing harder and harder until she feels powerless.

Kat becomes tired in this position quickly, "I need to get on my back, theres not enough room, Joe can you get in the, hee hoo hee hoo, ahhh, get in the front and I'll put one leg either side of the front seats, that way my legs will be spread as far as they can be, and ill be open for baby to come out". Joe quickly gets up "let me help you into position" but Poppy realises she needs to help her best friend "Joe you get in the front I will help Kat get comfortable".

Kat huffs and puffs through the moving, she is so ready for the baby to be out by now, then it hits her. "I need to push harder, I need her out now, can you guide her Joe, Pops, hold this leg back as far as you can, nghggg ahhh, hoo hooo". At this point the other boys have all left and its pitch black, the only lights are the car lights and phone torches.

Kat is sweating so much that her face is shining. She starts to panic because she feels exhausted and like she's been pushing too long "get me to a hospital Pop, this isnt right". Poppy answers with a smile "You're fine, you're doing great, you're so so strong. We can see the head now, shes beautiful, she has your colour hair, just keep doing what you're doing mama". Kat soon starts to feel the ring of fire and starts to close her legs "it burns, I cant take it I'm going to rip, I'm going to open, is there blood? I cant, ahhh hoo hoo hoo nghhhh".

Kats progress is phenomenal and Joe is crying because of his girlfriends strength, "you're doing so good, I'm so proud of you, not much left now, just get the head out completely and then it's nearly over and we have a daughter".

I need to move positions" Kat snaps, "Shes coming" Kat suddenly staggers onto hands and knees, this is when she gets really strong, she starts to push with all of her might. "Its stuck, I cant move it, put your fingers in and rub them around the head, she needs to come out I cant push anymore it hurts". "Ooohhh this is it, I'm going to rip, fu*k, AAAHH".

Joe encourages Kat all the can "Come on honey a few more pushes, you're going great, you're doing it come on, push! Harder! Come on Kat push like you've never pushed before, yes, yes, come on sweetheart, push harder.. HARDER".

Kat is barely catching a breath and is baring down to hard she feels like shes going to rip. "Try little pushes, like ngh ngh ngh ngh rather than nghhhhh" says Poppy "It might change things and speed up the progress". "I'm not strong enough I cant go any longer, please call an ambulance, I need help, they can cut me and ahhhhhh, f*ck I think shes coming down, nghhhh, hooo hooo hooo AAHHHH can you see her? JOE CAN YOU SEE THE SHOULDERS, AHHHHHHHHH" she takes a breath and pushes until shes red in the face "hnnnnnngggggg here she is, it's time! I'm ready. To. Pusshhhhhhh. Oh my god, fu.. AHHHHH" . "Shes here beautiful, you're a Mommy. You're amazing, you're so perfect, I love you so much" Joe cries.