#blueberry tart ethics

[hedgehog-moss]

I went to a restaurant with a friend yesterday and upon entering we saw these splendid blueberry tarts under bell jars on the counter and we made jokey small talk with the waitress like oh, people will fight over these if there's not enough for everyone, it'll tear families apart, are you making more later? and she said no, I'm afraid that's our entire stock for today, but there are 18 slices, it should be plenty! It was a small village restaurant with only one menu du jour so there weren't any other dessert options but they don't usually get that many customers—but then a couple of large groups arrived and most people noticed the tarts like we did, and went ohh blueberry tart, it's been a while, I can't wait, and it became clear that when we'd get to the end of our meal there would be winners and losers in the blueberry tart rush

But later as we were about to order dessert I wasn't hungry anymore and I was like well that's too bad but someone else will be glad to get 'my' slice of tart—and my friend said yeah, me :) You should order it anyway, I'll eat both! At first I thought she was joking, but no. I said, there's not enough for everyone, you can't take two, and she said, we were going to order two slices, what difference does it make? and I was baffled that she couldn't see the ethical difference between two people eating one slice of tart each vs. one person eating two, when there's a limited quantity of tart. I felt like we were in a simplistic social justice metaphor it was so obvious, but there was no changing her mind. When I said "it's just... not nice" she said "okay" with a shrug, and what can you say to that. She added, you don't know any of these people and I was like, why are we reverting to tribal dynamics in a non-apocalyptic setting, how would you feel if we'd arrived a bit later and seen others ordering two desserts knowing you'd get zero? And she said, I would think that's their right, and I felt kind of amazed.

I pointed out that if she didn't think it was a wee bit wrong, she wouldn't ask me to order her second piece as if it was for me, and she said yeah maybe we don't need to do that, there's no law preventing me from ordering two desserts. What about Kant's categorical imperative Okay I guess you're not breaking any laws by taking more than your fair share of a thing other people also want, just failing a kindergarten-level morality test. I felt embarrassed for sounding like an annoying preachy rigid person so I dropped the issue, and as she ate her two slices she'd smile at me every time we overheard someone order coffee without dessert—like "See? There'll be enough, no one will be deprived of tart because of me!" as if that cancelled the fact that she didn't care in the first place. I guess it was one of these tiny issues that can still significantly alter the way you perceive a person. I tried to tell myself not to be so bothered about this small thing but I was! so bothered. And I felt like writing a letter to some agony aunt like "should I end a friendship over irreconcilable blueberry tart ethics"

[spacewombatty]

Tart Wars

A little snippet of wealthy engineer Anakin, and college professor Obi-Wan, arguing about blueberry tart ethical dilemmas (based off that one text post, you know the one).

“Hey,” Anakin said, halfway out of his diner seat. “I’m gonna grab our slices.” 

"I think we should just go, actually,” Obi-Wan said, nearly at the same time.

Anakin paused. The older man fixed him with the same expression.

Okay.

It was fine. It was perfectly fine. Obi-Wan could let this go. This was a nice little mom and pop cafe, they'd both been here back in Anakin's college days, and the crisscut fries were going to clog his arteries and kill him and he'd let them (that’s how good it was).

This was fine. He should let it go. (Obi-Wan had never let an argument go in his life.)

The older man continued. "There aren't enough slices."

Anakin had seen it coming, had felt it coming, had known the second Obi-Wan started bemoaning how full he was at every insistence of excitement at the prospect of a tart. He’d seen it coming, and still. Anakin was smiling too big. 

“It’s a cafe. This is what you do at cafes. You eat. Blueberry or raspberry? You’re thinking, Obi-Wan. I can see it. Stop it. You’re thinking too hard, Obi-Wan, stop—”

Anakin had seen it coming, all the signs of a raging storm, the darkening sky, the rumbling waves, the static in the air, and yet he was here. Here, present, lovely, and unflinching. Obi-Wan loved him so much. Still wasn't going to let this go. 

"There are no raspberry slices today, only blueberry. That's why there aren't enough tarts." Obi-Wan did not cross his arms in front of his chest. He did however, cut his last piece of burger into very very small sizes. "It's - this is a standard ethical dilemma of resource division."

“Say that again, but in English.” He was just being an asshole.

Obi-Wan snapped his teeth at him. "You're just being an arsehole."

“You’re turning tarts into an ethical dilemma, again, Professor!” Anakin retorted, grinning with all teeth.

Obi-Wan wasn't going to kick him, because violence in a gentleman's debate was only acceptable in the senate. He was, however, going to verbally destroy him. "I'm sorry, I assumed the concept of equal sharing was discussed in kindergarten and you must have heard of it."

And that’s when Anakin, simultaneously, decided he was going to buy the whole tart, and then he was going to shove Obi-Wan’s face in it, so now no one could enjoy them. 

“We were going to get to slices anyway, darling,” Anakin was speaking through gritted teeth, his dentist was going to hate him. “The slices would have gone to us anyways, and I’m hungry, and no one has ordered a slice of blueberry blast tart since the moment we got here.”

He was talking very loud. Someone at the back of the cafe coughed. Someone in another booth said, "Oh! They have tarts?" and were immediately shushed. 

"That's - fine,” Obi-Wan grit out. “You can have one slice. That would be fair, because I am giving up my slice to the general pool. I do not want it, someone else can have it. In the spirit of fairness, there is a net positive in the pot."

“Okay, it’s in the pool, and I want it, and I’ll buy it. Solved.”

"Anakin." Obi-Wan put his fork down hard, but not his knife.

“Hi—oh, waiter?” Anakin called. “I think I’m ready to order.”

"What are you-" The professor’s eyes were wide. He understood entirely how Anakin Skywalker got people to walk out of meetings. Maybe that's where he got his name, somehow Shmi just knew. 

"Why are we reverting to tribal dynamics in a non-apocalyptic setting?" He hissed. "This is uncalled for. Someone else could have ordered that pie!"

Anakin kicked him under the table, because he wasn’t a gentleman, and didn’t mind a little violence. Obi-Wan was right. Someone was ordering that pie, and he was doing it right in front of him. 

“Yeah, two slices, I think, thanks,” he said, and the silence after was damning, the entire cafe turned to look, there was a portal to the underworld opening up beneath Anakin’s feet ready to suck him down to the River Styx. At least, that’s all what the professor thought would happen. It did not. 

“You can say that about everything!” Anakin hissed back, once they were alone. “Your soup—your water, your stupid lemon in it!” 

A beat. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to say stupid.”

Obi-Wan did not throw up his hands or storm out. But he looked at Anakin and made the man understand that he could have. He might have. He absolutely would have.

"There was no supply shortage of soup!" He countered. “Or the little lemons! Which add a lot of flavor, you would know if you just tried one. It's–it's a matter of fairness, and equality, and you are infuriating!”

 The chauffeur pulled up for Anakin's private car. Obi-Wan didn't even wait until the door was fully closed to climb into his lap and kiss him. Did Anakin even like blueberries? Fuck, he kissed him again. They were kissing and Anakin tasted blueberries. He gripped Obi-Wan’s shirt, groaned against him, and the engineer’s chauffeur was staring dutifully ahead at the road like the good boy he was. But Anakin wrenched their lips apart just long enough to keep arguing, even as his fingers wound their way into Obi-Wan’s hair. 

“Three—“ A kiss to his throat. “—people ordered coffee with no dessert. There was half a tart when we left. They—“ Another kiss to his Adam's apple. “—should’ve been quicker, we were all on equal footing in the cafe, they were just slow Obi-Wan!”

The professor pulled back just enough to decimate him with his stare. "I'm going to fucking destroy you."

Anakin balked. Anakin Jr. did not. The engineer licked his lips once, unashamed and daring. “More tart for you, then.” 

If he was smacked, he deserved it--but all Obi-Wan did was bend down to pull him in for another bruising kiss, and nothing could taste any sweeter.

#star wars #obikin #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #anakin and obi wan #anakin x obi wan #the team #drabble #obi-wan suffers #anakin is insufferable #obikin rp #obikin fic #goofy as all hell #based on that one long post about the morality of taking two blueberry tart slices when there isnt enough for everyone in the cafe #everything is foreplay to them

[swweet-daarkness]

Things I’ve done since I’ve been at work since 3am:

-watched funny girl (for like the 100th time)

-panicked over a five page essay due in two days (that I haven’t started)

-eaten two pop tarts (blueberry)

-learned how to French braid my own hair

-read a 20,000 word fanfiction

-finished reading 20 pages for my criminology class and wrote a paragraph about it

-found a minutes worth of different sounds for my sound effects project

-animated 5 EQs for my 70 track DAW project

What I told myself I’d do at work:

-WRITE MY DAMN FIVE PAGE ETHICS PAPER THATS DUE IN TWO DAYS.

Do I have 2 1/2 hours left of work? Yes, but I found a new fanfic to read so....

#homework #work #fanficton #braiding #poptarts #why do i procrastinate so much #currently procrastinating #3am #ugh #funny girl

[notconsolation]

i hope u remember u reblogged an ask meme

all of them

very well darling, anything for you :*

Like my hair, this is getting unmanageably long and tangled, so I’m gonna put a readmore and hope it works

cherry turnover: who do you live with?

done

bananas foster: do you believe in soulmates?

uh this is tough because um. im a bit unsure on the concept? cause, like, I don’t believe in souls? or divine predetermination? or actually the concept that your relationship to one person will always be the same or that there is ‘someone out there’ that’s like a perfect match for you or something. I do, however, think that sometimes you meet people that you mesh with exceptionally well and that you would do well to spend time with and around. idk if that’s even related to soulmates, though. 

As a baseline I’m just a little bit in love with most people i spend time with and on and around, but i guess i’m quite picky with who i spend my time on and I keep my circle quite small. So. wow I don’t think that’s even related at all. No. no to soulmates, but yes to that feeling of relief and release when the puzzle piece of your personality slots beautifully into someone else’s.

glazed donut: would you rather visit a zoo or an aquarium?

hmmm……. I think zoo? but uh, not a big fan of them ethically. I love going to them and seeing animals, but I can never do it with a clear conscience. I do love them, though.

pumpkin pie: what were your interests as a child?

previously answered!

lemon tart: how many languages can you speak?

2 fluently (English and German), 1 Very mediocrely (Spanish), 1 currently learning (Russian - got an exam on that tomorrow actually whoop whoop), and I don’t think I can even call my Italian a language skill cause I don’t want to insult a beautiful and complex language, and I only have very passive and very rudimentary knowledge of the language

chocolate mousse: how is your relationship with your parents?

Good right now! strained, at times, but on the whole very good. Especially with my mother. She is one of my biggest everythings, and i would crumble without all the support she’s given me over the years. Doesn’t mean our relationship is un-complicated though. hooo boy. My father and I are somewhat cordial, but good on the whole as long as I don’t tell him too much about my problems or discuss social issues with him. He’s….. a bit like Lord Grantham from downtown abbey, but less…… aristocratic?

creme brûlée: describe your style

previously answered!

cheesecake: have you ever visited a sex shop?

………. you know what…… I don’t think I have? which is honestly shocking to me… I…… I don’t know how i’ve managed that? damn.

raspberry sorbet: favorite clothing stores?

uhhh. there’s a charity shop on the corner of my street that I love and it has cool little nick-nacks in the window that i keep meaning to buy and send you

green tea ice cream: who was your first crush?

Hmmmmmmmmm. This is surprisingly difficult. Mainly because I wouldn’t have characterised them as crushes at the time, because I didn’t realise that it counted if it was a girl. You know, those feelings of ‘ohmygodijustwannabearoundthem’ and all that. I mean i think various characters in various forms of media, probably, but in real life……. there was a girl called Esme in 2nd grade that I 100% had a crush on looking back. She had lots of freckles and a funky haircut that looked a bit like she had decided to do it herself, and these really beautiful green eyes. Yeah, damn, I had a massive crush on her. Also this boy called Aidan. Also in 2nd grade. I handled them both very differently. I was incredibly shy around Esme and barely ever spoke to her. Aidan I had this continuous arguing thing with and we had a lot of fun hating each other for a while before that burned out.

chocolate chip cookie: how has your life changed over the past year?

oh jeez. for better in the experiences I’ve had and the people I’ve met and some of the realisations I’ve had about myself. for worse in some mental health ways. on the whole I feel older, even more like wood that burns a little too well for comfort.

berry trifle: first & last concert you went to?

previously answered!

tapioca pudding: favorite animated characters?

Scar (the better ruler, especially when you para-analyze with Hamlet, fight me), Idefix (classic good boy), Mulan, and Genie

fudge brownie: do you like your name?

eh. I’m not wild on it. Idk, I’ve always felt like it’s a bit straight-laced? but it’s not the worst i guess. there’s just a lot of straight lines.

strawberry shortcake: are you good at keeping secrets?

I promised I wouldn’t tell.

tiramisu: are you daring when it comes to makeup & clothing or do you like to play it safe?

bit of  both. safe for everday, daring for night and for random days sprinkled in. still not that daring, though

oreo milkshake: do you sleep a lot?

yes and no? yes some nights, no most

apple crisp: how do you relax?

who’s she?

carrot cake: who is your celeb look alike?

you tell me. I’m genuinely interested, I have no idea. People used to say audrey hepburn, but that was a while ago do i’m not sure anymore. for real what do you think?

macaron: what is your ethnicity?

White. I’d love to do a DNA test to see exactly where from, but I can conclusively say white/caucasian

cinnamon bun: favorite salty snack?

previously answered!

red velvet cupcake: ask any question of your own

How do you feel about red velvet cake? Would it be better in blue? Actually how do you feel about blueberry cake? Baked berries in general?

#thank uuuu #<3 #<3 <3

[hopicecream]

The highly anticipated list of flavors for @Spicewalla Collaboration Night, Friday 3-9pm at The Creamery (167 Haywood Rd across from @HoleDoughnuts)! Dairy Ice Cream Purple Carrot Black Cardamom Green cardamom pods, when dried, take on a smoky and complex flavor which pairs perfectly with @RayburnFarms earthy purple carrots. Chocolate Kashmiri Chilli Ethically sourced chocolate powder gets a piquant punch from this fiery red powdered pepper. Golden Milk Crunch Spicewalla’s signature turmeric blend sees cinnamon, ginger, black pepper, nutmeg, and roasted coriander adding to the roundness of this vibrant creation with @FrenchBroadChocolates cacao nibs stirred in for tasty texture. Brown Butter Modena Balsamic Rub (Gluten) Subtle savory flavors dance among the song of sweet cream. Chai Masala Inspired by Indian street food, this blend magnifies the herbaceous ingredients to a new level of enjoyment. Vegan Ice Cream Apple Pie Spice Pecan Milk (nut) The embodiment of comfort, apple pie spices are blended with our own milk made from South Carolina pecans. Blueberry Coriander Crumble Pepita Milk (gluten free) Local blueberries paired with the dried and ground fruit of the cilantro plant with a lovely sweetened oat crumble. Strawberry Sumac Sorbet The tartness from sumac joins the unmistakable flavor of strawberry for a wonderfully balanced experience. . #icecream #veganicecream #Asheville #westasheville #wavl #eastwestavl #icecreamflights (at The Hop Ice Creamery) https://www.instagram.com/p/B5vMi_lBfk3/?igshid=13hhxenmzipv0

#icecream #veganicecream #asheville #westasheville #wavl #eastwestavl #icecreamflights

[sallyschocblog]

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Divine Chocolate was one of the first, in fact THE first luxury chocolate brand that I ever got to try. My family are huge supporters of Fairtrade (and also chocolate, ha ha!) and so Divine, being a Fairtrade ambassador product was a ‘go-to’ brand for us. My mother even sold it to the congregation at our local church, and she told anyone and everyone about the ethical side to this fantastic chocolate.

So, it has been instilled and engrained in me to fully appreciate products like this that are not only delicious, loving created and friendly to their environment, but also kind on the makers, 100% fair, equitable, transparent and beneficial to all!

With all of this in mind, I jumped at the chance to get a sneak peak and a taste of Divine Chocolate’s brand new range, image and incredible line of organic chocolates.

New and exciting flavours, high percentages, and intriguing little packages, I could not wait to get started. The cocoa is produced in Sao Tome, the first African country to grow cocoa for the mass market –  now producing for Divine, in more of a holistic, ethical, earth loving and people benefitting way! I love to see the faces behind the products… that’s what it is all about, right?

I will crack on and tell you what I thought about each bar, and which flavours stood out for me the most. I’d love to know your thoughts too, so check out the Divine website for the full range and their stockists as well.

I had to start with the 85% Cocoa Nib bar, because it blew my mind really! The flavours just POP, the nibs have great poignant texture and bring together the tasting notes of the cacao: fruity, oaky, caramel notes. It is just right at 85%, as it still remains silky smooth, and not too rich. With full bodied warmth, good depth of flavour, no astringency, and a fabulous cocoa intensity matched with multi-sensory cocoa nibs.

  Following with a crackle and a crunch! The Ginger and Turmeric bar 85%.  I’ve always adored the texture of ginger, which is the first thing I notice with this bar. The cocoa is creamy, rich and oaky, and I find it is not too sweet or overpowering. The after flavour brings in the turmeric, which is different, adds a twist and a layer. It is slightly acidic, with an aromatic almost herbal flavour. To me this is a well rounded and full bodied chocolate bar.

Following on from the ginger sweetness, the Lemon 85% bar is quite sharp, and punchy – but in a good way. The slight bitterness makes way for a gentle sweet flavour from the cocoa. The zesty flavour is both pleasing and sophisticated on the palate. I find this quite moor-ish!

The Blueberry and Popped Quinoa 85% bar took me by surprise, it seems to work really well! I’ve never had a bar containing quinoa but the texture is fantastic, and I almost experienced a ‘snap, crackle and pop’ as if it was a milk soaked bowl of rice crispies! The texture is great, wholesome with little bursts of blueberry. The fruitiness of the berry isn’t sickly sweet, but nicely tart, and flavourful.

Finally the 95% Exceptionally Rich dark bar. I’ve heard people say you can tell the good chocolate from the bad when the company can produce an unflavoured bar which is truly memorable, if not more so than all of the flavoured bars put together! I find this 95% chocolate has a delicious roasted flavour, with notes of coffee and malt. It is lightly sweet, there is no bitterness at all, just a richly dark, creamy flavour and ultra smooth texture! The 5% makes all the difference – takes the edge off a 100% which I still like, but is a WHOLE-nother taste experience.

Thank you Divine for your new, exciting organic range. There is something for every discerning chocophile. I can’t wait to see more of it in the shops, and being my mother’s daughter – will be shouting about it to anyone who will listen!

Absolutely Divine: The Organic Range I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Divine Chocolate was one of the first, in fact THE first luxury chocolate brand that I ever got to try.

[hedgehog-moss]

thank you for the blueberry tart discourse :') even though i ultimately land on "this is just what being friends with weird contradictory humans is like!" it has been very thought provoking and encouraged a lot of reflection <3 that said. you are so lucky this did not happen on twitter or you would've been on the global news by this evening asdksadksjfjksdfkskfjsd

Please no one screenshot this on twitter or reddit 😭🙏 Tumblr is the better platform to have these debates on and I say this as someone currently being diagnosed with various mental disorders on anon due to my one-tarter stance.

I just made a blackberry tart for 6 people and I will be apportioning it with a goniometer in one hand and my copy of Nicomachean Ethics in the other.

Unless Morille solves this tart dilemma for us once and for all, in her amoral cat way.

#ask #thank you to the people who shared their viewpoints on this in a normal way<3 #i'll try to answer some more messages tomorrow if i can. there are interesting points being made!

[hedgehog-moss]

May I respectfully observe that the blueberry tart ethics agonies is a wonderful candidate for 'tell me you're French without telling me you're French' scenario? The combination of philosophical gymnastics and patisserie is just....magnifique!

Merci

😂 Trying to think of how to make this scenario more French... like if our Parliament started weirdly intense debates to legislate on this niche issue as a way to distract from more important problems and came up with a law hated by the left and the right somehow, and/or the minister of the Interior declared that anyone buying two slices of pie without a written attestation (that you must write yourself to give yourself permission to buy pie) will be arrested, and he uses a worryingly loose and inexplicably racist definition of "pie", and Parisians started burning stuff by force of habit which led Macron to try and calm things down by a) making Announcements, b) giving a 2.5 hour TV speech no one watches in which he says "Let me be very clear" 5 times and "Whether you like it or not" 10 times, c) promising to organise a Great National Debate on blueberry pie ethics which prompts newspapers to write enthusiastic headlines because they never learn, and which goes utterly nowhere

#le Grenelle de la tarte à la myrtille avouez que c'est plausible #sans oublier le moment où le gouv découvre soudain l'aspect indéniablement budgétaire de cette tarte #donc 49.3 et motion de censure qui ne passe pas mais nous donne un faux espoir quand même parce que nous non plus on n'apprend pas #ask #''wait what's this absurd nonsense about the police asking you to write a paper saying you give yourself permission to do something?'' #it's french 😔

[hedgehog-moss]

honestly i can't see anything wrong with what she did. you cant live your life constantly analyzing the ethics of something as meaningless as wanting two desserts

I do spend my life constantly overanalysing everything unfortunately. I type sentences like "irreconcilable blueberry tart ethics" with derisive and mortified self-awareness

[hopicecream]

Full list of flavors for Cyclist Night, tonight 3-9pm at The @HopIceCreamery! Shown here on a flight board decorated by @ZenSutherland is an Ice Cream Flight of 4 :) Dairy #IceCream: Salted Caramel Our flagship flavor; dulce de leche based ice cream mixed with pieces of Carlito’s Sweet and Savory housemade salted caramel bits. Apple Crisp (G) We couldn’t resist making a bit of apple crisp with our first box of local apples! Sweet & spiced fried apples with oat streusel topping stirred into a vanilla & cinnamon base. Chevre with Tomato Jam Made with tomatoes picked fresh from The Creamery backyard garden - savory & sweet tomato jam pairs nicely with chevre ice cream. Black Velvet Local blackberries from @CreasmanFarms cooked in bourbon, then swirled into our rich chocolate ice cream. Summer, we’ll miss you. Peach Blueberry South Carolina peach ice cream with a swirl of our house made local blueberry jam. Delicious! #VeganIceCream: Death By Chocolate Coconut Milk For those among us who can’t get enough chocolate! Chocolate coconut milk ice cream with a fudge swirl and ethically sourced chocolate chips. Cinnamon Pecan Milk Rich, creamy pecan milk ice cream shines by itself, but here we’ve added a healthy dose of cinnamon and a sprinkle of candied pecan bits. Wild Sumac Sorbet Sumac grows all over the South. Tea made from the tart, tasty berries was used as a substitute for lemonade in rural Appalachia. Here we’ve made the tea with sumac grown by @RayburnFarm, then spun it into sorbet. #Asheville #avleat #avleats #eastwestavl #westasheville #wavl #vegan (at The Hop Ice Creamery)

#avleat #veganicecream #eastwestavl #westasheville #wavl #asheville #vegan #avleats #icecream