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dream-meister-translations · 1 year

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CINIS - VOICE COLLECTION

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"Come, my servant. Take my hand. Allow the Demon King to lead you to a new dimension!"

"Servant, do you wish to rule half this world?"

"I'm not familiar with real world maps."

"Where's the save point?"

"Yeah… We can get by with an umbrella."

"Visting the store is so exciting. Did you find any rare equipment? Keep an eye out for stat bonuses."

"I'm moved every time they call me the Demon King. Huh? They call me the Servant of the Gray Wolf? Tsk. I'll show them who the real master is."

"Don't be discouraged, challenge is good! We'll show them what we're made of next time, servant of the Demon King."

"Welcome, my servant. Lie back on the soft cushions and try some cake. I hear it's your favorite."

"Hahaha! As expected from a loyal servant! I will match your bravery with all my might!"

"The Magic Castle? What about it? Fufufu, I named it after myself. After all, it's the only place fit for a Demon King to take rest."

"They call me the Demon King. You should be honored to have seen me with your own eyes."

"Witness the true power of the Demon King."

"Let the games begin!"

"We'll clear this in the shortest time possible!"

"Let the darkness consume you!"

"Let's play!"

"I'll go for an insta-kill!"

"Let them know, Kinsmen of Darkness, that it's Game. Over."

"Continue…"

"Hah! That was overkill, huh?"

"Did I let my guard down…?"

"Did you find any rare items?"

"The basics, right?"

"I'm climbing up the ranks."

"It's a Lord's duty to take care of His servants. So if you're in trouble, please, tell me immediately."

"Hmm… You carry yourself with dignity as servant of the Demon King. I'm glad to have you by my side. Will you continue to stand by me?"

"Fight together, advance together. I'm proud to have a Servant like you."

"The Servant of the Demon King… No, I should call you my Right Hand, now. That's how much you mean to me."

"My servant… No, you are more than that… The bond I share with you is the most precious thing in the world to me."

"Hahaha! Any challenge! I will accept any challenge! Come! Have fun with the Demon King!"

"Come, my servants, flock to me! Now is the time to show our power… Together, we shall rule the 2D world!"

"Servants! It's time to play! …What? You're busy? Don't worry, the Demon King is the best at waiting!"

"Is that passion I see? Are you having fun? Haha, that's the way it should be!"

"It's been a long time since I was last outside. I've lived most my life locked inside that castle. It's all I've ever needed."

"Mission complete. Let's head home."

"Mm? Of course it's perfect. As the Demon King, one must be at their best at all times."

"My servant, I ask the contrary. Have I ever been in imperfect shape? For your information, this complexion is completely natural."

"It doesn't get better than this. Today's game marks my 100th win in a row."

"I worry you that much? What kind of a Demon King lets their servant look as sad as that?"

"…Okay, I admit. I'm a little tired… I've had more people asking to play against me as of late…"

"I think I'll nap for an hour or so once we get home. As my servant, it's your job to wake me up. I'm counting on you.

"Are you interested in this game, too? Then I, the Demon King, shall teach you how to play."

"A new game has arrived! Let's play it for the first time together! It'll be fun! No, you're not allowed to look at the manual in advance."

"Competitive games are so fun! You can compete with people from all over the world!"

"Huh? You keep asking me that… Are you about to jump into a game lobby?"

"Puzzle games, simulations, shooters, racing games… What genre do you prefer?"

"Name me any genre you like and I'll suggest 100 different games. I'm always ready to give people my recommendations."

"Claws of a demon king, huh? I might rarely make appearances to the public, but even still, one must take care of their appearance. "

"Why are you staring at my fingertips? Are you transfixed with how I hold my controller?"

"Do my nails get in the way? I would never allow my fingernails to dictate how I play the game."

"If they bother you so much, I give you special permission to take care of them."

"…Hm. You're quite dextrous. They're more beautiful than if I'd done them myself."

"I believe you deserve a reward. Sweets, video games, whatever your heart desires."

"The real face of the Demon King is not known to the public. Even if we were to run into someone, they wouldn't know who I am."

"Do you have a map by any chance? One can roam at will in a video game. But… In real life… Not so much…"

"The Demon King and His servant's secret quest… Hah! That's pretty funny."

"I'm doing well for a hermit, you say? Well there's more than enough space to exercise in the Magic Castle."

"Is there something on your mind? Please, do not hesitate. The Demon King is generous! I'll keep you company as long as you like."

"I'm… Somewhat new to this… People usually call me by my handle…"

"What's wrong? You need to ask a favor? Well, if it's for you of all people, of course I'll do it."

"What is it, my servant? You are calling my name so much today."

"Are you hungry? If so, tell me asap. I can't just let my servant starve."

"I checked the Magic Line. There's a fancy cafe nearby. Let's head there right away."

"Dust… You have some nerve defying me, but you are no match for my servant! Hmph!"

"Thank you for your help. Though it brings me shame as the Demon King…"

"Black clothes show dirt more than you'd think. But… But black is non-negotiable. It is the only color befitting the image of a royal Demon King."

"They're still dirty? Tsk. What a stubborn stain. Thank God you noticed."

"This area doesn't seem well maintained. Let us move on before you get dirt on you, too."

"What's with the surprised look on your face? The Lord cares for His servants, too, you know.. It's only natural…"

"What? I look tired? I took a nap before I left, so it's likely the remnants of that."

"You look like you're having a hard time. Bend down a little, let me help you. When we're next to each other like this, you're much smaller than I thought…"

"You're right. My servant is very clever. I'm glad I have a servant like you."

"Ugh, sorry about this… My hair seems quite fickle today…"

"Oh? My servant… Your hair is a bit of a mess. Let me fix it for you."

"My hair is soft? Like your favorite blanket? Are you… Praising me?"

"Servant, stay close to me. You are safest by the Demon King's side."

"If you're tired of walking, we could take a break at a nearby cafe. I wouldn't mind getting some tomato juice."

"Your eyes are so beautiful, even more so now I see them close up with my own."

"Servant, take my hand. Now put your other hand on my arm. Yes, now you are truly a Servant of the Lord."

"The Magic Company recommended this place to me so I wanted to bring you here."

"A real outing with you is already a must-do dream of mine. Now, where and what shall we do next?"

"I used to never go outside. But now… I look forward to going out with you."

"Too many games? Don't worry so much. This is my job, and I enjoy doing it."

"My cheeks must be cold. Being a vampire, I don't have a very high body temperature."

"Don't touch me when I'm not expecting it. It's upsetting and making it difficult to focus on the game."

"Why are you poking my cheeks so much? …They're pleasant to touch? You are a woman of unusual tastes."

"I think it's time to change things up. As much as you like touching my cheeks, I'm going to do the same to you."

"Your cheeks are so soft. And warmer than anything I've ever felt… I want to hold you like this forever."

"You think I've got marks from the controller on my hands? You've got pen marks, too. Because we both work hard at what we do."

"If you want to hold my hand, fine. I'd be honored to walk hand-in-hand with you."

"…Don't you hate it when we do this? You don't? Well, then… Let's keep doing it."

"It's nice to hold hands, isn't it? I feel like I'm flying higher than ever, thanks to you."

"I want to keep going out with you every once in a while. I'll even hold your hand. If that's what my servant wishes."

"Whatever you wish, I will make it happen. For you are my precious servant."

"Mmm, this ice cream is delicious. Try it, my servant. Don't hesitate to help yourself."

"I never thought I'd see the day when the Demon King would stand shoulder to shoulder with a servant. Or eat crepes with his servant. …It's not a bad feeling."

"Emma, open your mouth. I want to personally feed you something delicious."

"Hmm… I'm very satisfied. Does the taste change when you eat while walking? This is an intriguing discovery."

"My servant, do you know wh at my favorite meal is?"

"That sandwich you make. Nothing compares to it. I hope you'll make it again one day."

"I've been feeling a little… Strange… Lately. Whenever I'm around you, I want to touch you. I can't help it. …Does that scare you?"

"I feel safe with you, Emma… Will… Will you always be with me?"

"What's the matter? Your cheeks are looking a little red. Have you caught a cold? Come here, I'll take care of you."

"Hmm, where to next? I've enjoyed spending time with you! It's so exciting!"

"You don't have to get so close… Do I look lost to you? Hey, what do you think you're doing to the Demon King!?"

"Mm… I like this distance… A fitting position for the Servant of the Demon King…"

"Hm? What's the matter, Servant? Oh, we're not finished with this outing just yet, are we?"

"It's refreshing to be celebrated in person. I can see you smile right in front of me now. And I can't think of a better gift than that."

"Wait! I can't possibly accept anything more! As the Demon King, it's my duty to give unto my servants, not take!"

"Oh, this is good! A fitting tribute to the Demon King!"

"An offering to the Demon King? I gratefully accept."

"You servant, are you trying to reach a bad end…?"

"Oh relax, Servant. Anymore of this and it'll be overkill! You're more dangerous that I thought…"

"O' servant, you shall be rewarded for your daily work."

"Servant, are you good at adventure games? Capture the target? Perfect choice, as expected of you."

"This item on the Magic Line… I've never seen it before… This a new street fad?"

"Yes, this indeed would be a new challenge for me. Fufu, I'll have to take it head on!"

"Huh… If you overdo it with these things, it can be counterproductive, y'know? But that doesn't many any sense when it's you and me…"

"What's the best gift to make you like me? It's funny… It's never this hard to choose in game…"

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WELCK : You really do think highly of yourself, calling yourself the Demon King. One day I will defeat you. CINIS : Gray Wolf. I praise your courage, challenging the Demon King like this. You know I'm always ready to accept.

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CINIS : Here we go, Gray Wolf. WELCK : Ugh… You're so full of yourself…

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CINIS : Our turn. WELCK : We're not going to lose.

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WELCK : Cinis is every bit as competitive as I expected. CINIS : Now do you understand why they call me the Demon King?

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WELCK : Double check! CINIS : Oooh, this is getting fun!

#Otome #Yumekuro #Yumekuro Translations #YMKR translations #YMKR #Dream Meister Translations #Otome Translations #Dream Meister And The Recollected Black Fairy #Dream Meister And The Recollected Black Fairy translations #Welck #CinisVoice #Cinis

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lgctaeha · 11 months

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╭ ✿ STUTTER ! ╯

LGC GIRLS JAPAN ( interview )

It didn't take very long for Taeha to consider being called in Kim Hyuncheol's office something to fear. There were always rumors of trainees that had been pulled in for mysterious meetings only to never be seen again in practice sessions. Despite her appearance being completely voluntary, she can't help but feel a slight bout of nerves bubbling up in her chest. Nervous jitters seem to follow her into her seat, all of her focus shifting to maintaining her composure - and controlling the trembling of her hands in her lap. So, why are you interested in being in LGC GIRLS JAPAN?

She'd rehearsed her answer more times than she count count ( although she's certain her friends and dormmates most likely could with all of her endless obsessing over the past month ), but it seemed in the moment all coherent thought simply flittered right out of her brain and into the air vents. "Well, I - I -" she gulps, trying to swallow the ever forming lump in her throat as the silence lingers on. "I - I really like takoyaki," she blurts finally, blinking a few times.

"I've always wanted to try it. But the authentic kind... But that's not the only reason!" she gives an awkward chuckle, nails digging into her palms as she racks her brain for a more appropriate answer. With her mental script in the wind, she lets her nervous rambling take over. "I wanted to be in LGC Girls Japan because... I thought it would be a lot of fun! Girls Gotta Live was released around the time I joined Legacy and I just remember thinking that they looked so cool and wishing that I could be part of it - I even covered it for one of my solo evaluations!"

"And as trainees it's not often that we get the chance to see what it's like to promote in the way that LGC Girls do... and I just thought it would be a good way for me to showcase all that I've been working on this far! And I know it will be challenging in a lot of ways... I'm still working on my Japanese and getting used to performing on stage... but I feel like this is something that would really help me grow as a performer! Just taking another step towards being the kind of idol that I've always looked up to... So... that's why!" She gives an affirmative nod, anxiously twiddling her thumbs in her lap.

And considering the current confirmed members, what can you add to the formation on AND off stage if you are picked?

"Well..." she trails off again, gaze wandering this way and that. "I know that the current members have already been preparing for promotions, so I think it will be important to have someone that can catch on to things quickly! I have a strong dance background, so I know I'll be able to keep up with learning new choreography - " she states so matter-of-factly with a subtle lift of her brows. She didn't want to seem overconfident, but she knew her strengths and thought it best to highlight them. " - and whenever I can't I'll make sure to double down on my rehearsal time until I do! That and really encompassing the concept that we're given is important, right? With all of the extra acting workshops and musical preparations, I've been able to work on that a lot and I think I'll be able to handle whatever concept is thrown at me!"

"And off stage... I see myself as being someone who can add to the overall mood of a unit. I want to bring a lot of energy to the group... and laughs! I even learned a lot of tongue twisters in our Japanese lessons the other day and everyone thought they were really funny! Do you want to hear - !" she leans forward suddenly, excited to start rattling them off but thinks better of it. "Uh, sorry - What were you saying?"

Their interview comes to a close and once dismissed, a wave of relief washes over Taeha and carries her towards the door. Before she can rush off, she stops in the doorway to give a nod of her head and a bright smile, "Thank you for the opportunity and I look forward to meeting with you again! Or maybe not... Er, well, maybe yes, but for good things! Only for good things!"

#╰ ❮ ❀ legacy ⁄ casting ; ❯#lgc:lgcgirlsjapan #( spoken wc: 405 )#( you know the drill - brain is mush pretend this isn't here kthnxbye )

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annieintheaair · 16 days

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The voices I've been hearing in my head are more believable than anything you've said. Don't tell me that it's bad timing.

I've seen these posts on Instagram lately that say, "You look happier since..." with examples of things that one would change in their life like prioritizing how your life feels instead of how it looks, giving yourself the same love you've always given others, decided to let people lose you instead of begging them to choose you, and stopped looking for love in the same place you lost it.

As I headed out yesterday for my busy Wednesday afternoon, I snapped a picture because I was super excited that I finally figured out how to style my hair the way that my hair stylist does.

I ended up sitting in traffic for so long that instead of driving for one hour, I was driving for an hour and forty minutes. It was long but it gave me a lot of time to think. I realized that weirdly enough, even though work has been crazy and I've been working a ton, I've found so much more joy in being at work with my coworkers that it doesn't feel as much of a drag to go to work nearly every night.

When I looked back at the photo I took, I felt like I genuinely looked happy. Wednesdays are always my favorite because I serve at Students at my church. We had our final dinner and discussion for the school year and sadly, we only have two weeks left before we are done for the summer. I'm so glad that even though we'll be off from Students, my team is planning some get-togethers over the summer.

Anyway, I thought about the whole "You look happier since..." thing, and even though many of the ones I've seen apply to me, I had a few of my own, too:

I look happier since I started working more to pursue my own goals.

I look happier since I started prioritizing my own health and fitness and lost weight.

I look happier since I cut back on drinking.

I look happier since I began focusing on relationships with genuine friends.

I look happier since I've allowed myself to rest when needed.

I look happier since I found joy in being single again.

I look happier since I gave myself grace in the timing of getting things done.

I had a lot of days this week that just didn't go as planned. This whole month so far has been a challenge. I've realized that I just can't do everything and instead of forcing myself to rush into decisions when I'm unsure, it's better for me to give myself the time and space to do things at the right time.

I am super bummed about not moving ahead of summer so that I could celebrate 35 in a new place and enjoy summer with a pool but I'm reminding myself that the place I really want to move to will be worth the wait. They said they'll be starting hard hat tours this month and I'm really excited to eventually get to go check it out and confirm that it's exactly what I want. Maybe once I see it in person I'll feel better about the wait. It's hard when there's so much that we just don't know.

I've prayed a lot about making the right decisions and I'm confident that God is leading me in the best direction. There have been a lot of times over the last few months when I questioned God's timing and His plan. We always feel like we have the best plan but then things change and we have to realize that our plan was not God's plan but He has something so much better in mind.

I look happier since I started accepting God's plan and timing for my life.

xoxo

Annie

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loversoftwentytwo · 5 months

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Happy new year, Kilian.

This is just a silly letter I wrote when I was … 🤔 I forgot, sorry, the only thing I remember is I was and is deeply in love with you that I could write ten million words and more).

Hello, I probably wouldn’t know what I'm writing because I'm doing this on the day before Christmas Eve, the night where I feel the sleepiness but I still tried to stay awake, then because it wasn't too strong to do so, I finally fell asleep 💤

Thinking of this year ending soon, I should have something better than what I'm about to give, but maybe I won't be able to make it because I'm defeated by time (yes we’re on in a running race). Maybe next time. Anyways you’re reading a raw message and I hope you'll forgive me if there are a few things off (maybe it's a typo… or else).

Kilian, I have a lot of things in my head that I want to say, and then I describe them in detail so that you understand what I'm saying. I'm not that great at expressing my feelings, but one or two I can probably handle. :]

I love you that I don't even know where to start. Every time your name comes up, the first thing I think of is I love you. I love you so much I can't think of anything else other than that. You could say your name is a mantra to control all my emotions. You once said you wanted to see me angry, but to be honest, Kilian, I doubt I'll ever be able to get angry because every time I face you, all my negative emotions vanish like the wind and get buried at the bottom of the soil. I don't know maybe it can get angry, but for now, that's all that comes to mind.

By the way you’re the one who made me almost run out of metaphors to show how much I love you that I don't know what to describe it, but here is something I’ve prepared.

Congratulations, Heith D. Kilian, on being JJ’s best boyfriend! 🥁

It’s not something big heheh yet as the year draws to a close, I find myself filled with a mixture of emotions, but my main one is prayer. Prayer for your happiness and well-being, for your days to be full of light, and for your life to be paved with success. I wish for your happiness to be like a sunrise, bright and radiant, bringing warmth and light to your life and mine, to us. I want your well-being to be like a river sweeping through the mountains, pure and cleansing, leaving behind a path of serenity and peace.

I often see that we have many differences, and perhaps I have succeeded in deciphering them. Kilian, my love for you is like the sun, shining bright and empowering its warmest light. It's a fire that burns bright and never dims, always giving off the excitement and contentment that fills my heart. And then there’s your love, Kilian, your love for me—to me—is like the moon, shining softly and bathing everything in a gentle moonlight. It's a calming and peaceful presence that reminds me of your tenderness.

I think you're getting bored of reading my blabbering, so let's stop here. I'll keep a few sentences to give you next time. :] But give me a moment, please, I’m sure you know this but I’m infinitely in love and always missing you, my heart aches with every moment that we're apart, and my love grows infinitely with each passing day. The wind touches my cheeks and brings bittersweet memories of you, reminding me of the moments that we had together and making me yearn for your embrace, more, even more. I want to stay with you to experience every moment of happiness, to love you in good times and in bad, and to face the challenges together. My heart, my feelings, my love, those are for you and infinite and boundless, and I want to stay with you indefinitely (hope we can do this)

P.s. I know nothing to give but I know I love you endlessly.

Xx, JJ.

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looseleaftales · 6 months

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starting off with a personal tarot reading - i got stressed about impulsively starting this account, so the question was "did i completely mess up my social media usage with this?"

(it's late, so just a basic pass through the positions. i might do more operations on this set tomorrow).

situation - empress. creativity, wanting a place to express myself and share things i love. the whole point of this page is to eventually build up to regularly reading for people. i miss it, and it's not really working on my main social media site (mastodon). also potentially - me trying to nurture myself in new ways by allowing myself to be loud about the meaningful stuff.

motivation - 5 of cups. it's emotionally challenging, to not only be physically isolated, but have the virtual connections be somewhat limited. if i can't share the things that matter - yearning. i can get random interactions anywhere, i want to share meaningfully, contribute.

first steps - ace of cups. just start a new thing about my interests, this is correct, that is what i've done.

outlook - 8 of wands. intensity, overwhelm. i started thinking about all the various apps and websites i'm on for socializing, and while there's not much activity in each, there are already too many of them for me. so adding to that feels like a bad choice. and then thinking about all the projects i want to be doing next year, joining obod - there's also a mentorship and forum situation there. wanted to try play by post roleplay forums, too. just. so many things to pay attention to. i don't have that many words to go around.

asset - page of wands. i'm like... really good at starting stuff, i just love the first stages of figuring stuff out, excitement. so what if it doesn't proceed like i thought? if it doesn't work, or works too well - it will settle. or i'll just drop it. it's really not a big deal, it can just be fun for now. i can just post tarot things i found, i don't have to Produce and Give Of Myself all the time. chill out.

what needs to be in place - 9 of wands. withdrawal of energy. yes. i don't have to Be On Tumblr now. i can just pop in once a day, once every few days. follow people who don't spam so i can always manage my timeline even after an absence, interact without getting trapped in the scroll. or only come on when i have something of substance to post. maybe it's something to think about: how to guard my attention, my spoons etc to make the most of this place?

opportunity - 3 of coins. growth. probably just a little push to start this out right and Interact, follow up with folks who like/reply/reblog/follow, to get the ball rolling a little bit. but that's after i figure out the 9 of wands.

ok, feeling a little better. and i have an idea - i'll make a page with my favorite resources. or a pinned post, if you can have more than one, not sure. or a little series of posts under a unifying tag. so that's something nice and easy to work on that doesn't put any social Demands on me for my brain to Avoid by default.

#tarot

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lianahayze · 11 months

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Shadow and the Midnight Misery: Chapter 7

No excuses for the delay. Here's chapter 7, and you can check out chapter 6 here. Enjoy!

Chapter 7: Studio Time

The guitar in my lap feels heavier than usual. I lean over it to read the words in front of me, the pick wedged between my lips. I hum to myself, coming up with a pattern before I test it out.

I haven't been in the studio that long. I need the time, though, which is why I'm by myself. Eventually, I'll have to meet up with the guys, but, right now, I still don't want anything to do with them.

I'm still shocked that they had the nerve to all show up at Garver. I understand that one of them had to sign my release papers, but all of them? Did they expected me to be excited to see them, like they weren’t the ones who’d thrown me in there in the first place? If that’s what they’d thought, they’d been delusional.

They'd tried to get a hold of me. I'd ignored them, of course. I'm not even ready to text them. I want them to sweat it out a bit, to realize what a stupid mistake they’d made. They need more than I need them, and they need to learn that.

Sighing, I place my guitar to the side. Realistically, I need to finish these lyrics before I even think about putting them to music. Under normal circumstances, I'd get input from the guys, but, since that isn't an option right now, I'm on my own. I skim the lyrics, trying to figure out what I'm missing.

Word-wise, the chorus is good. Even the intro is fine. There's just something about the end that I don't like, and I don't know why.

I stare down at the guitar. I need to have something put together in a few days. Not just because I want to have something to rub in their faces, but also because of the interview.

It was supposed to be last week while I’d been at Garver. Being locked up, I hadn’t been able to call and reschedule it, but luckily someone at the label had. I don’t know what lie had been told—I highly doubt, “Hi, Shadow is currently in a three-day detox” had been used—but I’m glad it had gotten done. I love interviewing with the band, but I always take full advantage of the solo ones, especially if they involve new music.

This interviewer probably isn't expecting anything full-length, but she'll probably want a couple of soundbites for Instagram or whatever. I'd look like an idiot if I don't have anything, especially because The Midnight Misery has been "ever so diligently working on new music."

At least, that's what we've been telling everyone.

I groan. With my lower back hurting, I decide to take a break. I stand up, stretch, then look around. When I find my bag, I reach for it and head for the door. It's only when I'm outside that I pull out a joint.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. I'm not supposed to be smoking. But I'm also not supposed to be drinking or doing coke. That's a lot of stuff to try to quit all at once. I figure the weed is the least harmful, so it's the one I'll stick with for now. I'm not partying so I'm not tempted on the other two, but it's been a bit challenging.

Even since I went AWOL on Dean, he's wanted to hang out. I haven’t told him what happened; instead, I’d made up some dumb excuse about losing my charger. Coming up with new excuses as to why I can’t hang out is getting harder and harder to do.

I take a long deep breath. I let the smoke expand in my lungs, the buzz going straight to my brain. To hell with Dr. Norris' ten-minute rule. One drag of a joint makes me feel better than thinking for ten minutes ever will.

Once I finish up, I go back into the studio. My head feels more clear and relaxed, but, as I sit down to write, I realize that it’s just not going to happen. I reach for the guitar and strum a few chords. I hum along as the strings vibrate, feeling it in my soul. I'm by no means an expert on guitar, but I can at least get by.

I lean my head back and close my eyes. I wonder why the guys are up to. They like to hang out even when it doesn’t involve band stuff, and I wouldn't be surprised if they were together right now. Probably trash-talking me. Probably still thinking about how to get rid of me.

I can’t believe the label had actually okay’ed everything. It’s so crazy that it makes me wonder if they even actually went to the label. For all I know, they could be lying. Sure, The Midnight Misery may not be the label’s biggest band, but we get a lot of publicity—a lot of publicity because of me. If you combined that with all the other bands that have joined the label because of me, it’d be stupid to get rid of me.

Why don’t any of them realize that?

I'm so focused on my own thoughts that I don't even notice the door open. I continue to strum. The longer I think about it, the more violent my strumming becomes. It's only when I hear someone say my name that I finally snap out of it.

I stare at my dad as he closes the door behind him. It's the first time we've seen each other since almost a week ago, and to be honest, I’m not complaining. I don’t have anything to say to him. Ever since I was released from Garver, I haven’t heard from him. No call. No text. If he doesn’t want to speak to me then I don’t want to speak to him.

I tightly grasp the neck of the guitar. As my eyes trail down to the floor, I spot my notebook, opened on the couch. I reach forward and close it. For several moments, we’re both silent, each more stubborn than the other.

Eventually, I become tired of the awkward silence and ask,

"Do you need the studio?"

He looks at me sadly, and, for the first time I realize: he hasn't said anything because he hasn't wanted to. He hasn't said anything because he doesn't know how to. I almost feel bad for him, but then I remember that he had been complicit.

The band had probably planned everything, but it wasn’t like he hadn’t known about it. They definitely told him about it. How else would he have known to show up the same time as Dr. Dorian? And in my eyes, that makes him just as guilty.

"I uh." He clears his throat. "No. I mean, I have some editing to do, but you're fine." He pauses. "Lucille told me you were here."

I roll my eyes. The cleaning lady. Of course. I'd tried to pass through the house quietly, but evidently, I hadn't been quiet enough.

"I should go." Without looking at him, I kick open my guitar case and place the guitar inside. As I'm locking it up, he says,

"Don't have to rush out on my account. Stay as long as you want to."

But that's the problem: I don’t want to stay. Yes, I want to work on my music, but I want to work on my music alone. If he stays, I won’t be able to concentrate.

"Next time I'll check to see if you'll need the studio."

"Shadow, take all the time you need. The episode is all recorded, so it's really just a matter of chopping out some stuff."

He's referring to his podcast. I've only listened to a few episodes because most of them are too, um, raunchy for me, but whenever he talks about it, I can’t help but be proud. I know that he's happy that he’s managed to stay relevant beyond his music career, I think, but right now, I just don't care.

I lift up the guitar case. "See ya around." I start to walk past him, but he puts out his arm to stop me. Sighing, I say, “What?"

"How was Garver?"

I roll my eyes. Oh, now he cares? "Fine. I got everything I needed and more."

He nods once. He looks like he’s choosing his words carefully, but I don’t have time for this. "You know, there's nothing wrong with getting help. You wouldn’t be the first in the family who..." He rubs the back of his neck. "Well, you just wouldn’t be the first."

I know that. I’ve read enough Wiki pages and listened to enough interviews to know I'm not the only one. Back in the mid-90s he'd gone to rehab, too. The only difference is that his stint was a couple of months, not just a few days. His had also been for drugs but not the same ones I'm on. He'd been into the heavy stuff; all of The Nixers had. To this day, he still doesn’t really like to talk about it.

"So, you don't have to feel bad. That's what I'm trying to say."

“I don't feel bad.” I really don’t. If anything, I’m pissed. If I felt bad, it would mean I felt guilty, and I have nothing to feel guilty about.

"I think they were just worried about you. Wyatt mentioned that you missed a couple of rehearsals?"

"No. I was late to a couple of rehearsals."

"Maybe you don't remember the ones you missed."

My eyebrows shoot up. "So you're going to trust someone you've only known for a couple of years over your own daughter?"

He sighs. "That's not what this is about, and you know it. I trust you. But Wyatt has a good head on his shoulders; he's the type of person you want to be in a band with."

He's going on and on and on and all I'm getting is disgusted. "Yeah, yeah, yeah," I say, "he's talented and reliable and all of that. But he, just like you, went behind my back and had me locked up." I pause. "Imagine how that makes me feel."

A silence falls between us. Neither looks at the other, and I start to become restless. I can’t get enough air to my lungs, and I take several deep breaths to stop my sudden dizziness.

"I understand what you're going through."

No, he doesn't. He doesn't understand jack shit. Just because he did his own stint in rehab, he thinks he knows what the last few days have been like for me. And maybe he does know about the last few days. But the last few years--the whole reason I am the way I am--he has no idea what that’s like at all.

I look around the studio. Though I don't say it, I realize something: I can't come back here. I can't use this studio anymore. As nice as it is to be able to drop into whenever I want, if I come back here, I'm never going to get anything done.

I sniffle just thinking about it. This won't be the first time that a studio has been tainted for me, but this is just... It's different.

I glance over to the couch. I think about sitting between Wyatt and Dave. I picture Dr. Dorian sitting across from me. All of those words that had stung then cut deeper now. The wounds are raw and new, and I realize something:

This place is absolutely ruined for me.

I clear my throat. "I need to go." He opens his mouth to say something, but I shake my head, saying, "No, I can't be here right now." Head bowed, I walked to the door. "Or ever."

I need to find a new studio, one that's completely different than this one. One with space and light and that won't make me feel suffocated as I go inside.

He doesn't stop me as I walk out this time. With my head high, I begin planning. I want a new studio and the guys want a new producer. I think, no, I know, that I can make both of them happen.

#writer #music novel #music #original story #satmm #story #fiction #free fiction #free story #writing life

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thenoseofdeath · 2 years

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This is a blog of my replay of the Uncharted series. I'll give my thoughts for each game as I go through them.

Apart from Uncharted 1 which I played a few years ago. I haven't replayed the others since they first came out so this'll be interesting

This entry gets a lot of hate and I can see why. The story is simple but decent and the game has good dialogue and solid Voice acting. The gameplay and controls however are a problem.

Aiming can be a pain, movement isn't as tight as you would want and climbing can be finicky. Now these weren't too much of a problem back in 2007 but they stick out like a sore thumb in 2022. Adding to those problems is the insane amount of combat encounters and you're left with a game that is very frustrating and annoying to play.

That being said. Combat was somehow still fun so it's not too bad I guess but I think I have a higher tolerance for these things.

Music was great, the game has nice sound design, the old PS3 era vibe is still there (I miss that) and the visuals are still really nice.

So even though the game annoyed me to a degree. I still enjoyed myself and I definitely wouldn't consider this a bad game. It's just old and dated.

This honestly should've gotten a remake instead of TLOU. It would've seriously benefited from it.

What can I say? Huh? What can I say?

This game is among my top 10 greatest video games of all time for a reason!

Top to bottom, from beginning to end. This game was insane all the way through. A god damn roller coaster ride!

My only complaint that this game is SO good that 13 years later, I STILL remember most of it. So the chance of re-experiencing those epic moments for the first time again just couldn't happen unfortunately.

Also had play on easy for final boss coz it was annoying but IDGAF

Regardless. This game is just as amazing as I remember and 60fps just elevates it further. Felt like it never left, man.

Story, characters, dialogue, voice acting, gameplay, level design, visuals, combat and set pieces.

I don't care if it has flaws. I love it all!

So I was never a big fan of this entry but this time is a bit different.

I enjoyed this a lot more than I did back on PS3. The first half didn't leave a great impression but it got better once you reach Yemmen and then it was fantastic from the Shipyard onwards. I absolutely loved the 2nd half and it pretty much saved the game for me.

That being said. I do have some problems with it. Particularly in the first half though some of those do show up in the 2nd half. It just isn't as noticeable.

-The way the levels are laid out

-Enemy placement

-How the guns feel

-Stealth feels very restrictive

-Hate the crosshair

-The A.I.

-The vibe

-Unfair Difficulty

It all just felt off and I wasn't feeling a lot of it.

Even things like Drakes animations which aren't always accurate to the present situation.

For example. Drakes running animation during combat or chase sequences are too relaxed and slow looking or during stealth he isn't exactly moving as stealthy. He's almost walking casually. Its like he does some of his actions half assed.

The other big problem was the difficulty. Look I'm all for a game wanting to challenge me and even make me feel overwhelmed as that can heighten the tension and make things more exciting which UC3 does but man do they go overboard with it.

Uncharted 1 & 2 had a system. The enemies were in front of you, others would creep on the side trying to flank you and then a new wave would come from behind. You were always behind cover and were able to defend yourself while they tried different tactics to lure you out. It was simple and effective.

Uncharted 3 said fuck all that. Lets have everyone come at you from all sides, then ramp up the difficulty to artificial levels by throwing 3 snipers, 3-4 armoured shotgunners, 2 unarmoured shotgunners, an rpg guy, a missle projectile guy, 3 fucking tanks and barely any cover. Call it a skill issue, I don't care. That shit is straight up unfair. A lot of times I felt like I got through that shit from just pure luck.

If they had just cut it down a LITTLE bit and gave me a bit of breathing room then I wouldn't be complaining as much.

With all that in mind though. I kinda liked it. Managing to take out huge waves of powerful enemies while being put in such an unfair situation is quite satisfying. It really makes you feel like a badass.

It works for the plot too. Drake being way in over his head is shown through gameplay and adds to the narrative so thats pretty cool.

Now onto the positives.

-Visuals are beautiful

-Set pieces are awesome

-Hand to hand combat is great

-Dialogue is still great

-Funniest entry so far

-Charlie is a great edition though you don't see him after the first quarter and he only appears in this entry so thats a bummer

-Music is good

-Puzzles were really good

Another thing I loved was all the subtle details to make the world feel more alive.

Drake put his hand on the wall while walking, parts of the environment would react to Drake's touch and that shit would vary in many ways. Granted they only happen once but it's still cool.

That 2nd half was just amazing and it really made me think more positively about this entry. I think when I first played it back on PS3, I was just so gutted by the negatives that I couldn't see the positives.

Is it UC2 level? No but its kinda close.

Good game!

I gotta admit. I really enjoyed this one. I wasn't a big fan of this entry back when it first came out. Had a lot of problems with it like the vibe, aspects of the story, no Chloe or Charlie and even things like gunplay and difficulty. Now Im not so sure why I wasn't feeling it.

The game is great. Controls are fantastic, and responsive, guns feel really good, level design is brilliant and parkour (as basic as it is) is really fun. Oh and the stealth is great. I'm so happy they fixed it. Uncharted 3 was so restrictive. Its like they looked at Uncharted 2 and thought "lets do this but better". Now you can actually stealth through many sections and not be forced into a gunfight. The areas are so well designed too so you have a ton of options to take em out.

Love it!

Now for the story. I really like the darker and more mature vibe they went with. Drake's decisions have actual consequences so its not your typical action hero story this time around and thats good. I personally wouldn't mind it if it was but its good that its different.

They put a bigger focus on the characters too and provided them with more depth than in past entries. Made them feel more down to earth rather than movie action heroes and I like that. It's good stuff.

I really like Sam too and I think he's a great edition to the cast. Rafe is also a really good villain and the best written out of the bunch. I still prefer Lazarevic from Uncharted 2 by miles.

Now as for problems? I don't have much tbh. I wish Chloe was in this but I can't see how they could've included her in so I get it.

I miss the supernatural aspect but I guess that would've worked against the more grounded take they went for here so it's fine I guess

I also hate that I couldn't get at least one hit on Nadine. I just wanted one good satisfying punch but nope. She walks away unscathed. I mean dude. You can't just have her kick me about like that and not give me the opportunity to enact some revenge. I want some payback god damnit!

Small spoiler but I wasn't really liking the whole destiny thing they were going for during one of the flashbacks. The whole "it runs in the family" thing kinda bothers me

It's not a big deal of course and it does make sense why Drake and Sam are so into history but still.

Anyway. That's about it with the negatives. There really isn't anything to complain about. Naughty Dog provided a solid and nicely paced ride that delivers on (almost) all fronts.

It's a fun action packed adventure with good puzzles, fantastic set pieces, gorgeous visuals and a really good story accompanied by some of the best performances in the gaming industry. Its the perfect send off for Nathan Drake and I had an absolute blast replaying it.

#Uncharted2 #Uncharted3 #Uncharted4 #UnchartedLostLegacy #Playstation #Playstation3 #Playatation4 #Playstation5 #PS3 #PS4 #PS5 #Gaming #Games #Video Games

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littleemptyattik · 2 years

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i'm moving in less than a week to start my career and, in theory, my life at last. as exciting as that is, a series of disappointments has lessened my excitement into a sort of dull neutrality.

though the position is in my field and i'm grateful for that, it's not the ideal job i wanted out of grad school; in addition, ironically the one place i didn't want to live was my hometown, and i ended up having to turn down offers in my dream town on the coast and accept the one in my hometown because it's much better pay. add onto that i was hoping to have begun a serious relationship while in grad school, and i'm still single, which makes the financial burden heavier than all my married/engaged friends'. i'm also having to spend much more money on moving and housing than i anticipated, which is a depressing thing to be faced with as a single person on entry-level pay. oh, and the other job offers i had to turn down would have come with a lab coat, which is a very silly thing to dream about wearing at work i'm sure, but somehow it still stings to think with the job i had to choose, i'll be wearing scrubs instead now, just like the prim little nurse my mom always wished i would be and i never wanted to be.

i'm sorry to anyone who might be reading this--i'm not normally a negative person at all, but i think i've reached my breaking point with disappointments in the last three years and having all these hit at once has been challenging.

all of this to say, in an attempt to get enthusiastic about my move, i went on pinterest and randomly saved things from the homepage without thinking too deeply about it. i then went and took a screenshot of the "all pins" part of my profile, and this was the result. i've decided that this aesthetic is going to be my guide as i move forward with my life in the next few weeks. i want to start embracing my gothic romantic side a little more, as that's a piece of me i haven't indulged much in the past but is always very much present. i would love it if someone reading this would do the same--save things one after the other on pinterest without considering it too seriously, and then use that imagery to set your mental path for the next few weeks. i think it will be a fun way to guide myself into my new life.

wish me luck, friends!

#rin speaks

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weepinglevi · 3 years

Text

patience is a virtue

summary: college!au. all aged up. eren and reader continue with their sexual escapades. find part one here! warnings: 18+ minors dni. dirty text messages, dirty talk. dom!eren and bratty reader (i suppose?). throat fucking and semi-public sex. (no p in v tho) word count: around 3.5k A/N: i have a love/hate relationship with this eren ahaha, he's been ruling my brainrot ever since the last part so i hope you enjoy! there will be a part three eventually, so be on the lookout for that! enjoy your read and feedback is greatly appreciated! xx

you awake to your phone vibrating somewhere next to you. the hope of it only being a one-time occurrence quickly proven to be false as it just wouldn't stop. brr-brr. a second of silence. brr-brr. pause. brr-brr.

taking a mental note to never go to sleep again without turning off your phone, you roll over to your other side and try to ignore it. you could simply answer the texts, but that meant you'd have to open your eyes. and that whoever was texting you would win this weird battle you've just come up with in your head.

"if you don't pick up your goddamn phone, i'll smack you over the head with it," sasha groans from the other side of your shared dorm, words coming slurry with her tiredness.

brr-brr.

"i could also stick it up your ass, your decision," a pillow comes flying to your head, serving as enough of a warning for you to sit up in your bed, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

"quit moaning, i'll turn it off now," you yawn, feeling around your bed for your phone, "you never hear me complaining about the shit you do in the middle of the night."

"that's because my shit is funny and not fucking annoying," she scoffs, followed by a muted thump as she is sinking back down into her pillows. sasha's way of ending the conversation.

you find your phone half-tucked underneath your pillow, the display already lighting up again. someone is desperate for attention, you think to yourself and unlock your phone with an annoyed sigh. the messages were coming from an unknown number.

thinking about your wet pussy. this is eren, btw. historia gave me your number. i told her you wouldn't mind you don't mind, do you?

in a matter of seconds, your heart is beating in your throat once more, just like this afternoon in that godforsaken computer lab. ears growing hot at his words, you could almost imagine the sound of him laughing at you again. with trembling fingers, you scroll down further.

anyway, let's do it again sometime i told you. i'll never let you forget about how you moaned my name i'm also not forgetting about how badly i want to fuck that pretty mouth of yours, so it's a win-win see ya, then

staring down at your phone, you don't know if you should answer him. and even if you would answer his texts, what the hell should you say? "fucking bastard," the words escaping your mouth before even realizing that you'd better keep quiet. the only thing that could make this situation any worse was if sasha were to wake up again.

scratch that, you think as you see eren's new messages.

how badly do you want to suck my cock? you looked really hot today, covered in my cum what, you're shy again?

there are two ways this could go: either you stand up, put on some clothes, and then go to eren's dorm to let hell rain upon him - or simply mute your phone and ignore him. deciding to go with the latter, you lie back down and save his number as "fuckhead", a small grin forming on your face. if he wants to be childish, then you can be, too.

the display still lighting up at a steady pace, you have to fight the urge to open his other messages. to physically prevent yourself from grabbing your phone again, you put your hands between your thighs and sigh. what the hell have i gotten myself into?

"so, who am i gonna have to teach some manners today?", sasha asks in the morning, "because there are only two valid reasons for sending that many texts in the middle of the night," she sits up in her bed and bends over to reach for her phone, "either someone's dead or there's a food sale."

cringing at the thought of having to read the countless other messages eren has sent throughout the night, you try to laugh at her comment, "of course, when there's food involved, you're all for it."

"girl's gotta eat," she claims, thankfully being too distracted by something on her phone to notice your strange behavior, "i'm gonna be back later than usual today, connie wants me to be his wingman again."

starting to go off on a tangent about how connie should just get a dating app already, sasha's words become more of background noise to you. you want to know what he wrote. what he has in store for you. at the same time, you curse yourself out. you're turning into a headless chicken and all of it because of eren fucking yeager?

you nod here and there, offering her a "yes" at what you believe to be fitting moments, desperately hoping she doesn't catch up on your restlessness. all the while the two of you are getting ready for the day. this goes on for a few more minutes and you have no clue what she's talking about now, so you decide to grab your phone and stand up.

"i'm gonna go for a run around campus, you want coffee?" you blurt out, interrupting her monologue. the device in your hand feels as if it's burning through your skin. slipping into your trainers, you're already halfway out the room, her perplexed "uh- yes, please," being muffled by the door closing behind you.

it's still warm outside - not as hot as yesterday, but warm enough for you to be glad to have forgotten your cardigan earlier. you let out a deep breath, trying to clear your mind. even though you told sasha you'd be out for a run, you walk at a slow pace.

some people are already wandering around campus, most of them on their way to a lecture. at this time in the morning, everyone has their heads full with their own worries so no one notices you slowly making your way off-campus.

arriving at a little park surrounded by trees, you sit down on the bench farest off. you notice your heart fluttering like the wings of a hummingbird when pulling the phone out of your back pocket. fuck him, you think once again while typing in your code. fuck him for making me feel this way.

12 unread messages.

didn't seem all too shy when i had my hand wrapped around your throat no need to play hard to get when i already had you if that makes sense? haven't fucked you yet doesn't mean i won't get to fuck you

all you want is to feel appalled by these messages. to screenshot them and send them to the dean. maybe even to his mother. sickened with yourself though, you already feel the familiar warmth creeping up your body, curling up in your abdomen.

i know you want it, too how fucking needy you were for me getting yourself off in public to the thought of me maybe you can tell me what exactly you were thinking of? gonna make sure to let your dreams come true, princess

pet names? you clench your fist at the thought of eren leaning over you, breathing the word princess into your ear. you have an inkling that he'd say it mockingly; spitting it out whilst gathering your hair in a ponytail, arching your back forcefully, and slamming his length into you without mercy.

no. you hate pet names. at least, you've always hated them.

i'm gonna find out if you're ignoring me right now remember, you're not the best actress. fucking suck at it, actually wouldn't want to be punished now, would we?

his last message echoed in your head. still coming to terms with the fact of what happened yesterday, now you have to deal with a whole new revelation: eren yeager being a cocky motherfucker pushing all the right buttons for you. even though you want to blast his ass for this, the mere thought of him being near you again is too sweet of an imagination.

you want to play this game, too. for whatever reason keep on riding this high, and you just know that no one could do it quite as well as eren can. somehow you can only imagine taking him on this ride with you, no one else.

so, in that manner you decide to ignore his messages. if he's desperate enough to keep on sending them in the middle of the night, you're sure it won't be long until he sends another text. and it would give him enough reason to try and punish you, whatever that might entail – you're excited to find out. fucking nervous, too. but then again, who wouldn't be?

you stand up and put your phone in your back pocket, a sense of excitement surrounding your steps as you turn left to make your way to the nearest coffee shop.

"something tells me you're ignoring me," of course, the moment eren's voice comes up behind you, you fucking flinch like a little bird that's been scared away, "mostly because i've seen you reading the messages, but what do i know?"

you turn to see him clutching his heart dramatically, "don't play with my feelings like this," he swoons, bringing one hand to his forehead. he's laughing again, all white teeth and bright smiles – you realize this is the kind of eren you rarely get to see. not the cocky bastard he normally portrays; right now, he seems to be a happy-go-lucky kind of guy, just enjoying himself. still, you want to show him that you can play just as well as he can.

crossing your arms in front of your chest, you slightly raise a brow, trying your hardest to not look as nervous as you feel. it's a lost cause though because you can already feel the tips of your ears glowing with heat again. can't things go my way for once? just once? you think and chew the inside of your cheek. you felt so sure of yourself just moments ago. how the hell can he have this sort of effect on you?

suddenly, his whole demeanor changes. before, he seemed laid-back, entertained by the game he played with you. now he leans forward, hands in the pockets of his jacket and an almost cruel smile forming on his lips, "don't try to challenge me in this. you'll lose."

you know that you should feel frightened. terrified, even. he's looking like a lion preparing to jump the antelope, a sense of alarming calmness around him that's causing the small hairs on your neck to stand up. but alas, the way he's looking at you seems to have the same effect on you his scent has.

"i told you not to ignore me," eren says and takes a few steps closer to you, "yet here you are, doing it again." the chuckle leaving his lips a stark contrast to his stern gaze, still trained on you. somehow, you feel awfully small again - still not frightened, though. you stare right back at him, tilting your head slightly as if you wanted to say "so what?"

"are you seriously that desperate to be punished?"

better now than never, you think and once again place a courtly smile on your lips, "seems like it."

for a split second, you see eren's smug look turn into a genuine smile. realizing that you're up for his game, he lets out a smooth whistle, "you do surprise me."

"if you wouldn't always be so full of yourself, i'm sure you'd have recognized this sooner," you can feel the confidence growing in yourself again. clinging on to it, you take a step toward him, "i'm full of surprises."

"oh, yeah? i bet you are," from the corner of your eye, you can see him lifting his hand. before thinking twice about it, you bat it away, "i'm not one for public displays of affection."

oh, it is on– eren's smirk turns into a full-fledged grin as he takes a grip of your wrist, "you sure about that?" lifting your hand to his face, for a short moment you think he's going to suck on your fingers again. but all he does is place a faint kiss on the back of your hand, "didn't seem like it yesterday."

"you weren't supposed to see."

"but i'm so glad i did," he leans forward, the two of you standing so close you can feel his breath on your face, "or else we wouldn't have this kind of fun right now."

still having a hold of your hand, he lifts his other to your jaw, gently tracing his thumb across your lower lip, "you looked so pretty in your skirt yesterday."

taking a leap of faith, you grab his hand, holding it in place and letting your tongue run across the tip of his thumb before biting down playfully. there's a hiss and then eren pulls away and grabs your arm, "come with me."

finally, you think and let him guide you to wherever he wants, let's have some fun, then.

on your way out of the park, you pass jean and marco. even though they stand to greet eren, he just raises his hand whilst not breaking his pace, "gotta go, have an assignment to work on."

"never seen you that determined, but go off," jean laughs.

before you know it, you're inside one of the countless maintenance sheds. pushing you against the wall, eren's movements seem to become more and more erratic by the second. pinning your arms over your head, he's looking down at you, breathing heavily. "you have no idea what you just got yourself into," licking his lips, he chuckles.

"oh, but i think i actually do," you smile innocently, fucking glad to have found your normal self again. admittedly, eren threw you off your game since yesterday – but it's just going to play into your hands now. he won't see it coming until it's hitting him straight in the face; that you're just as messed up as he seems to be.

"then prove it," he breathes against your ear, "tell me how badly you want it."

the stuffy air inside the dimly lit shed doesn't help with keeping eren's scent away from you. being so close to him, looking up into his shadowed face and right into his dilated eyes; you're like putty in his hands. you try to move forward, to touch him in some way because you just know that he'll feel so good under your skin.

"now now, princess," he moves even closer, wedging you between himself and the wall, "how about we learn some patience, first?"

you nod, but then grind up against his thigh, hissing through your teeth, "i worry i'll be a real handful." you know you could very well move your hands, too – eren seems to still be testing the waters as to how far he can go with you. but with him actually letting you grind on him; you decide to play into his hands.

your breaths grow quicker as you keep on, pace becoming erratic. all you want is to get rid of your track pants – come to think of it, what you actually want is eren under you whilst you continuously bounce on his cock. you want to hear him call you princess and immediately after call you his little whore because that's exactly what you are.

eren has a little smile on his lips and you know you should ask yourself why – because you're doing exactly what he has forbidden you to do – but you're too far gone. the heat growing, you feel your knees buckle but he's holding you up; one hand now resting on your waist for support. you're so close –

and then he pulls away from you, nearly causing you to topple over. chest heaving, you place your hands on your knees for balance, "what the fuck was – "

"patience is a virtue," interrupting you with a laugh, but his voice heavy with lust, "thought i might give you a lesson you're ought to remember."

you look up to see eren palming his erection through his pants, standing about an arm's length away from you, "but i have to admit, hearing you getting yourself off is fucking hot."

biting your teeth together, you straighten up and take a step toward him – only for him to click his tongue in disapproval, "you're gonna stay right there," tugging at his pants he raises his eyebrow, "i told you what i want, get on your knees for me."

"the fuck i will," you spit out and make a move again, grasping for his waistband. but eren is quick to take a hold of your hand and pushes you back to the wall, "come on, now, princess," he chuckles but his eyes are concentrated at you, "you want this, don't you?". he's asking for permission, the thought feeling very comforting to you. and also, very excited for what's about to come.

"of course, i do," you answer him earnestly, resting the back of your head against the wall, "or else i wouldn't be here."

"fantastic," he breathes, a little smile playing in the corners of his mouth, "then get down on your knees," placing his hands on your shoulders, weighing you down, "i won't ask again."

the change of tone in his voice has you nodding, slowly sinking onto your knees, you're bursting in anticipation. one hand finally pulling down his pants, he runs his other through your hair, then down your jaw until it comes to rest on your chin.

thumbing at your lower lip, he groans "do i have to be careful?"

you just shake your head no. then you break away from his gaze, fixing your eyes on the bobbing cock in front of you. it's tip leaking with precum already, you remember how badly you wanted to lick it away yesterday.

taking his cock at its base, you bend forward and slide your tongue around its head. the salty taste sending shudders down your spine, you make sure to lift your eyes again once you prepare to take it all down your throat. your other hand snakes up to his balls, slightly tugging them which earns you a moan from eren, and fuck, you're so wet at the sound alone, you let go of his cock and slide one hand down to your own center.

he gathers your hair in one hand, taking the base of his throbbing cock in the other, "bet this is what you thought of yesterday," he slowly but surely pulls your head in closer, "of how i fuck the words right out of you."

bucking your hips into your own hand, you can do nothing but whimper at his words. because yes, this is exactly what you imagined. he's only halfway in and you're already struggling to breathe, but not wanting him to stop you hold your breath and push down even further; trying desperately not to moan.

the tears in your eyes causing your vision to be blurry, you attempt to blink them away.

"shit – ", he's pumping into you now, rubbing the tears from your cheeks and then placing both his hands on your head, "you're doing so well – "

getting lost in his words, the fear of being caught is so far away; you finally moan around his cock. saliva soaking the hem of his shirt, you can't seem to take his whole length, no matter how hard you try. you're a fucking mess under him and the thought alone is nearly sending you over the edge.

he's trying to pull away now and you know he's close, so you snake your hand around his hip, hoping this is enough of a sign to him that if he dared to cum anywhere else than down your throat, you'd bite him.

"you really – " his voice is hoarse, "fuck – this is fucking perfect," he moans as he comes to the realization. leaning his arm against the wall behind you, he's fucking himself into your mouth, his panting and the sound of your choking filling the room.

you close your eyes to blink the tears away again, but eren pulls on your hair, "no – look at me."

with this the knot in your belly explodes, leaving you holding on to eren's hip as you ride the waves of electricity that are running through your body like lava.

"such a good little whore – " he's gone as well, holding your head in place as he's pumping his load down your throat, leaving you no other option than to swallow – which you eagerly do. you feel his legs shaking under your hands.

once again, eren hands you his shirt to clean your face. this time, you take it with a smile, noting that, "i still have your other one."

"don't worry, i'll come get it sometime when sasha's away," the two of you know exactly what this means – neither of you are planning on this to be over anytime soon.

"i'll let you know, then," you nod and stand up, hoping you don't look as well-fucked as you feel, and make your way to the door, "she's gone most of the time."

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differentkettleoffishalltogether · 4 years

Text

I’m On Fire [Chapter 2]

With her sister’s wedding fast approaching and her Mom hounding her about finding a date, Y/N makes a terrible decision that lands her and her least favorite genius in a confusing situation.

Chapter Summary: Y/N and Spencer start to put a plan together.

A/N: I’ve got a head cold at the mo’ but I had to get a covid test just in case so I’m not allowed leave my room till I get the results! So enjoy a bonus chapter while I wallow on my own for like 36 hours :( On a positive note, thank you guys all so much for the response to chapter 1 I really didn’t see that coming! I’ve tagged everyone who asked, let me know if you wanna be added

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem Reader

Category: Fake Dating, Enemies to Lovers, (Eventual) Smut, Fluff, Angst, it’s a Slow Burn Baby

Warnings: Cursing, some NSFW language/themes

Word Count: 6.1k

Previous Chapter -- Next Chapter

Series Masterlist

Masterlist

"Are you coming up or what?"

The question was still ringing in my ears. It caught me completely off guard. 'Up' as in up to Spencer's apartment? Where he lived? I knew he lived somewhere in theory, just like I knew deep down that he wasn't made in a test tube.

Without noticing I've undone my seatbelt and I'm hopping out of the car, following him around to the front door. I guess I am coming up.

Spencer's apartment is more cosy than I thought it was going to be. It's warm and lived in. It's not big, but I think that might be what makes it homely. Something about the way he behaves had me thinking it would be fully decked out in stainless steel or glass or something. But it wasn't pristine, it was messy.

There were books bursting from the shelves that lined the walls of the apartment, along with books laid open over nearly every surface in the place, it looked like he was in the middle of reading all of them, and honestly, I didn't doubt it. Maybe I'd misjudged him. He even had some photos of what looked like his family, and maybe friends, even some of the BAU, lining his walls or propped up on his mantle. He had little trinkets and souvenirs on his shelves too, evidence that he'd been around the country for reasons other than a case. I would never admit it to him but there was a real charm to the place.

Once we got inside he took off his bag and suit jacket, tossing them on the desk just inside of the door. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do, and he seemed to pick up on my awkward energy.

"You can make yourself at home" he said, his confident streak remaining. I had no idea what to do with that. What would even make me comfortable in Spencer Reid's apartment? I took a seat on his sofa and just sat with my hands resting in my lap. Really not even sure where I should look without feeling like I was invading his privacy. Even though I wanted to. I think it was morbid curiosity, looking for clues on who this man might actually be outside of the BAU. What I really wanted to do was stand up and walk around, soaking in every bit if this place as if it would help me decipher our messy relationship.

He returned to the living room a few moments later, two mismatched mugs in his hands. He places one in front of me on the coffee table. I pick it up and take a sip. It's lemon and ginger, how did he know what kind of tea I liked? I held the mug in my hands inhaling the steam in an effort to relax. When I look up he's watching me, arms folded across his chest.

"So, how does this thing work. What's the game plan?" I honestly have no real idea. This evening really got away from me, I was still expecting to snap out of it and wake up in my bed at any moment.

"Well I can't say I've ever been in a Sandra Bullock movie before either so this is uncharted territory for me too" I say with a chuckle, trying to ease the tension. Even a little. I can see him crack a small smile but hides it almost instantly, his face hardening again.

"My sister, Margot, she's getting married in like 4 months." I can feel myself tense and I shake out my shoulders, I have to remind myself that he's agreed to this already, "Fuck it, I'm just going to be honest with you. My Mom's mostly freaked out that I'm too attached to this job and that I'll just never find someone again." I shouldn't have said again, fuck. I hope he didn't pick up on that. Who am I kidding. "Even though, I'm not sure I care if I do or don't?" he doesn't say anything, like he's waiting for me to continue. I know I've shared a little too much already but I keep going.

"Margot's 2 years younger than me, I introduced her to her fiancé Philip, we met in college, he's a sweetheart. But since they've gotten engaged Mom's gotten exponentially weirder. I think she's convinced I'm fully going to die alone, as if that would be the worst thing that could ever happen? Anyway, she's been trying to auction me off to all these guys, using this wedding as an excuse. I'm not sure how much of that phone call you actually heard earlier but Mom was trying to sell me on this guy, David, and I just… snapped." I look up at Spencer and he unfolds his arms, leaning in ever so slightly coaxing the story out of me.

"David, he uh, he worked for my father for a while back in high school, filing documents and stuff, busy work mostly. He used to make out with me when he was at our house after school, but then he'd ignore me in the halls the next morning. I know it's because I was a pariah back then or something but I didn't want to think about it today and I just got worked up. I shouldn't have let on that you were my date, I was just going to ask if I could bring Garcia or something, and I'm sorry." I cover my face in my hands, "I'm insane, you can back out if you want to."

I can hear him move from his spot on the opposite side of the sofa, he takes my wrists and gently pulls my hands from my face. He looks into my eyes, "I'm in this now Y/N, what do you need me to do?" he asks, and there's a genuine earnest in his voice that I think I've only ever heard a handful of times. And it's never been directed at me.

"Okay, well we've got a few months before you ha–, wait, fuck!" I throw my head back, there's already a complication, "shit" I curse under my breath. His eyebrows knit together, sitting upright.

"What's the matter?" he asks.

"I forgot about my Mom's 50th, it's next month. They've got this whole huge party planned back home in upstate New York. I've gotta go and they'll probably want to meet you, or they're gonna have a load of questions for me at least. I can try and get you out of it I'm sure"

He gets that cocky look again, he shakes his head "I don't know, I've always liked a bit of competition" he reclines back into his corner of the sofa, taking a satisfied sip from his own mug before speaking again. "You know, if I've got to learn enough to pass as your boyfriend in a month, surely that means you've got to learn enough to pass as my girlfriend within the month, no?"

Oh god. What have I done, why didn't I think this far ahead. "I mean, yeah I guess you're right." I had to remember he was doing me a favor. I had to get over myself. "Okay, if you're sure you're up for that?" I ask, and he nods, and I think he looks excited, or maybe he just finds the whole situation funny.

"If anyone's up for the competition it's you" he says, and I'm not sure if that's a compliment or a dig but I nod in agreement.

He takes another sip of his tea, collected and relaxed. I can't help but notice how at ease he is when he's in his own surroundings. I'm so used to seeing him sitting at a desk surrounded by paperwork, or combing through file after file in the make-shift office in a small-town police station, usually flustered or anxious, or antagonizing me whenever he wasn’t. This was a different Spencer. Completely in control, at ease.

"Alright, shall we get started then, we can't really afford to waste any time can we?" he was actually sort of right, so I nodded. It was only now occurring to me that I'd have to share parts of my personal life with him if I wanted this plan to work. We already knew the basics about each other, I'd read his file when I started at the BAU, I'd read everyones. And I feel like it was safe to presume he'd done the same.

His eyes bore directly into mine as he leaned forward, I think he was enjoying how uncomfortable I must've looked.

"How about I ask you some rapid-fire questions and you have to answer 'em?" he asks, and it's as good of a plan as any, and I can't think of any other suggestions, so I nod.

"Okay, shoot." I say, unsure and nervous, so I brace myself. I'm just grateful that he's making my life easier rather than harder for what feels like the first time since I met him.

I really should've known better.

He leans in, "So Y/N, first question, when did you lose your virginity?"

I almost choke on the mouthful of tea I just took, that can't be what he just asked, and he looks like he's savoring my shocked expression.

"I uh, I don't think you need to know that?" is all I can get out.

"Really? You think that's something your boyfriend wouldn't know about you?" he's right, but I didn't want to admit it outright.

"I feel like I sort of already hinted. It was that same guy David, I was 18, he was 19. We had sex on the couch while my parents went out one evening. I kept my bra on the whole time, he came, I didn't. It was all very standard stuff." I wasn't sure what compelled me to add that last part. I think I was giving in to the open honestly thing. "So what about you Doc?" I challenged.

He didn't seem embarrassed, or even shy. "I must've bloomed little later than you" he admits with a soft chuckle, "Vivian Stewart, I was 21, she was too. It was the last semester of my last PhD and I figured I must be missing out on something. And I sure was" he smirks to himself. "I came, she did too, 3 times. I did a lot of research ahead of time" he mirrored my story and I rolled my eyes. It was hard not to feel a little impressed but I tried with everything I had to stifle it so he couldn't tell. I wish it didn't make me feel something but it did. I gulp down the mouthful of tea that's been sitting in my throat.

I have to shake myself back to reality. I can't give him the satisfaction of throwing me. "My turn." I command, "When was your last relationship Dr. Reid?" I ask, "I mean like, serious one, not like hook-up" I clarify before he can ask. He thinks on it for a moment.

"I'm not sure what you classify as fully serious, but I guess it was this girl, Rebecca, we dated for a while when I first joined the BAU but it didn't work out. What about you?" he flips it back.

"So that was what, like 6-ish years ago?" I ask, he just nods.

"Mine was like 3 years ago now I think. I met this guy Nathan on my first week of college, we dated for like 4 years. He moved here for me when I got accepted by the BAU." I had to stop myself from delving into the detail. It was a long time ago now but it still hurt. "Long story short, the hours were demanding and they got in the way more than I would've liked. We ended up splitting a couple months after I got the job." I tried to play it off like it wasn't one of the more devastating things to happen in my life. But something told me he’d registered that, so he didn't push.

His energy picks up and he looks at me with a grin, but there's something a little sinister behind it. "I've got a more fun question for you." he leans in closer to me, "Y/N, when was the last time you got laid?" I just looked at him in shock.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me, I can go first if you really need me to?" his voice didn't waver,

"Fuck you Reid, I know when it was!" I snapped back at him. I did have to think back a little farther than I'd like to pull up the memory.

"Met this guy in a bar when I was out with Pen one night, we went back to his place and hooked up." I say as deadpan as I can make it.

"Well that's not very exciting is it?" he jokes, "Did you at least cum that time?" I know he's just trying to rile me up, but I answer anyway.

"As a matter of fact I did" I earn back a little of my confidence.

"I'm so happy for you, but you did manage to avoid my initial question" fuck "when was this exciting night of yours Y/N?" he probes, like I really, really wished he wouldn't. I could lie, but I'm sure he'd be able to tell. I cringe before I can say it.

"About 8 months ago" I mutter, just low enough for him to hear.

"Sorry, did you just say 8 months ago?" He nearly shouts in disbelief, he seems to find it funny.

"Hey fuck you Spencer!" I go on the defensive, "When was the last time you even got laid?"

"Like two and half weeks ago" he says, confident, and still laughing, "Wait wait, when was the last time you got yourself off? I know you're not waiting 8 months!" he giggles and I think I could kill him. I know I kept giving him outs but was it too late for me to just get up and leave?

"I'm not doing this with you if you're just gonna make fun of me Reid, I get enough of that at work" I get out, my voice is serious but I'm trying to hide how awkward all of this is making me feel, and I don't know that I'm doing a very good job.

I can tell that's gotten to him, he relaxes and eases up on the giggling. "Look okay wait Y/N. I'll stop, I'm not actually trying to make fun of you. I was being serious, I think stuff like this is important if we're gonna have to be comfortable around each other enough to seem like a real couple. Plus, it'll just help break the ice?" he shrugs. "But you don't have to answer if you don't want to."

I soften, because I agree, even thought I hate that he's right. "Fine" I collect my thoughts, "2 nights ago I'm pretty sure." I regret it almost instantly, but breaking the ice is supposed to feel awkward.

"Same here actually," he chuckles, "what'd you do?" I'm so startled by the question I almost forget how to answer.

"I, uh, my, my vibrator? I just felt like uh, I watched some..." I still can't force out a whole sentence. It's not like I was always awkward about sex or anything, I could talk to Garcia, or honestly probably any of the other team members about it. But with Spencer it didn't feel as comfortable. He still sat calmly, smiling just a little.

"Same here, 2 nights back, but with my hands I guess. I wonder if we were doing it at the same time?" he mutters the last part gently and my head goes a bit fuzzy. My eyes drift away from his face and settle on his hands, the mug he's holding looks so tiny with his fingers wrapped around it, I wondered how they'd look wrapped around my-

"Okay I think that's enough for one night, don't you think?" I jump up off the sofa and turn, mostly so that he doesn't catch the blush thats creeping from my neck up to my cheeks. And because I don't know what I'll say, or regret saying, if this conversations continues on its current trajectory.

"Sure," he says, standing up next to me, and I want to move further away instantly, "you're probably right, and it's getting a little late now anyway" he glances at his watch. Ushering me back towards his front door and opening it up. Before I can walk out he lightly touches my shoulder to turn me back to face him, and I wonder if he can feel the heat radiating from every part of me.

"So are you free next Friday after work?" he asks, and I'm so flustered I almost forget why, I just nod. "Perfect, how about we come here again and we can dive into preparing? You could also make a start on getting these onto a hard drive?" he gestures to the antique looking hardbacks adorning the shelves.

'Sounds great!" I perk up, feigning enthusiasm, "See you then!"

"Well, see you Monday morning actually Y/N" he smirks as I walk out the door. Fuck, he was right.

I really hadn't thought this through.

——

The weekend was a bit of a blur. I decided to try and put some useful information into a document for Spencer. It felt strange to try and condense my life into as few pages as possible. I knew Reid had an eidetic memory, and nothing would necessarily overwhelm him. But I also knew that he was someone that the team relied on to fill in a lot of the gaps in the rest of the our knowledge. So I felt bad about dumping a load of information on him, especially considering it was a favor he was doing for me.

I'd complied the majority of my life into a 15 page document and printed it out. Hopefully that would address most of what my family could guerrilla attack him with. There was also something unsettling about the imbalance. I was going to give him so many of the intricate details of my life in a little file, whereas all I really knew about Spencer was what I'd taken it upon myself to learn about him throughout the past few years.

I'd read all of his work while I was in college, given how he was the gold standard of getting into the BAU at a young age, I wanted to know who this guy was. I think I'd pictured something different. And I couldn't deny there was something enticing about finally getting to know him after all of these years of working together. Maybe this could actually be fun, or interesting at least.

----

I arrived early on Monday morning. I thought I was first into the office as usual but Garcia was sitting in my desk chair waiting for me. The second she saw me walk in she tensed, she must've known we were the only people in this early.

"What happened! You've been avoiding me all weekend?" she asked, and she was right. I'd drafted enough texts to her, trying to explain what the plan was, mostly without wanting to admit that she was right. Maybe I was stubborn.

"Alright okay, I drove Reid home." I admitted, dropping my bag by my desk. She rolls her eyes at me, dramatic as always.

"Well I knew that already Y/N damn! What happened next?"

"Fine, we went into his apartment and talked for a while. Trying to sort out the details, get a handle on things I guess?" I said, unsure of how much I should actually give away about our conversation.

"What things!?" She shouts, standing up from my desk,

"I don't know Pen, like logistics and stuff, I still haven't decided how I feel about that little stunt you pulled on Friday night!" I let my frustration get the better of me, and maybe that's why I haven't talked to her. It could also be because I know she's able to read me like a book and I'm not even sure how I feel about this whole situation.

"I call bullshit." She counters, "I know you were relived as hell when I sorted that whole thing out. You would've had anxiety tummy all weekend if I hadn't called Spencer!" I just go silent, she was right. I'd gotten so caught up in the whole, 'how to have a fake boyfriend' that I'd almost forgotten about how stressed I was about Spencer hearing my call in the first place.

"Okay, shit" I sigh. "Maybe you were right Pen. We're actually meeting up again this Friday after work to make a plan for the next while, so I guess that's progress?" I shrug, trying to play it off like this whole situation doesn't make my stomach flip.

"Ohhhhh! So like a date?" She probes, her enthusiasm rising drastically.

"Oh my God Pen no! Like an appointment at best" I diffuse the situation

"Ugh that's no fun" she says, not even trying to disguise her disappointment.

As if on cue Dr. Reid walks through the double doors into the bullpen. Both Garcia and I wave, overall awkwardly, but making an attempt pretend like things were completely normal and like nothing had changed since the last time we were all in the office together.

Penelope heads to her office as the bullpen starts to fill up quickly. Less than an hour later though Garcia's back at my desk and there's a new case that needs the teams attention in Boston. I follow her into the conference room and wait for the rest of the team to join. Spencer follows a moment later with 2 cups of coffee in his hands. I can see my mug in his hand and my automatic response is that he's messing with me. But he places my mug in front of me in the circular table before taking the seat next to me, listening to Garcia's briefing. I don't know if he's ever sat next to me in this conference room, at least not by choice.

I barely had any time to finish my coffee before I have to say goodbye to Garcia and hop on the jet to Boston.

----

The case was grueling. More so than usual. It was wrapped up late on Thursday night and the team decided to fly back home first thing on Friday morning. I was exhausted. Even if there was enough time to get sleep each night it wasn't like I got any. Whenever a case got on top of me like this it made it hard to rest, or get it off my mind at all until it was wrapped up. So even though it was over, that didn't mean I wasn't exhausted.

Hotch gave the team the rest of the day off, given that we have until submit our paperwork by Monday. I wasn't sure if Spencer's invitation from the following week still stood. I didn't want to ask, partly because I was so tired, but also because I was scared. I wasn't about to show up at his house in an effort to have a heart to heart, or hand him a condensed version of my life story on a manilla envelope if he was as drained as I was.

Standing by my desk I packed up everything I'd need to get my paperwork done over the weekend, I was just about finished when Spencer snuck up behind me, perching himself on the edge of my desk. "So, you almost ready to go?" he asks, like it's the most obvious question in the world. I couldn't really hide my surprise.

"Oh yeah. That's fine, I mean, if you're still cool with that?" I ask, and I hate how flustered I sound, like he makes me nervous.

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?" He chuckles, standing up straight.

"Cool, gimme a sec and I'll be good to go."

I pack up the rest of my stuff quickly and we make our way out. There's something that feels a little eerie about the two of us being in an elevator together alone again. It was a different kind of awkward to how it felt a week before hand. It almost felt like a kind of tension rather than a hatred or a rivalry. Either way we rode down in silence.

Once we got to the basement Spencer walks out of the elevator and walks straight to my car without having to ask. I unlock it and he hops into the passenger seat. Like this is a natural interaction. Something we do all the time. And I don't hate it as much as I thought I would.

"So," he says, buckling up his seat belt and breaking the silence, "do you know how to get to my place from here or do you need directions again?"

"Well I've got to turn on the engine first" I tease, hoping he picks up on the reference to our last car ride, he chuckles like he does.

"Are you hungry?" he asks

"Starving."

The delivery guy get's to Spencer's apartment at almost the same time we do.

---

Once the food's been demolished the two of us finally sit on his sofa, the same sides as the week before. "So, shall we get back into this?" He asks, sitting forward slightly to pull a notebook out of his satchel on the floor. It's small and lavender, and it's got a pen clipped into the spine. He cracks it open and flips to a specific page.

"Sorry, what's that?" I ask, pointing to the book, he looks confused,

"They're my notes?" he says, like it should be obvious

"Your notes?" I ask,

"My notes on you." he smirks, again like I'm silly for even asking.

He had notes on me? He had a whole notebook on me? What was even in that thing?

"You've got notes on me?" I ask, my hands reaching out to grab it, but he retreats faster than I can catch him. "What have you got in there that's so serious?"

"Nothing." and his tone's a bit too stern and I don't really want to push it when he's being so uncharacteristically nice to me.

"I've actually got this ready for you" I pull the file out of my own bag and toss it to him. "I'm not sure exactly what you need to know but that should be the majority of it at least."

He opens it up and glances over the the pages. It takes him all of 2 minutes to get through the whole thing. It feels unsettling that he's taking in a boiled down version of my life while I'm just sitting on the opposite side of the sofa. Trying to avoid the attention I pipe up.

"Um, hey, maybe it would be a good time for you to show me where to make a start digitizing your books over here?" I stand up and make my way to the shelf. He jumps up off the sofa and walks toward me, visibly excited.

"That's actually a great idea, I thought that the theses from my degrees could be a good place to start, since I'm pretty sure they're not backed up anywhere." he guides me to a section of the book case by the window. There's a series of leather bound hardbacks, the same gold font embossed on the spines. I recognize all of them, pulling out the first one.

"This is my favorite" I say without thinking about it and he does a double take, clearly thrown.

"You've, uh, you read my work?" he asks, completely puzzled. I'm sort of proud that I've managed to make him this awkward, and I nod.

"Mmhm, back before I joined the BAU actually. Before I really knew you" I regret saying the last part, it comes out a little meaner than I really wanted it to so I back track. "Spencer, I read all of your work while I was in college, you were like the gold standard. I don't think I slept more than 2 hours a night throughout my PHD because I was just trying to get as much done as you." and his face softens at the admission. But it takes him a moment before he responds. Leaving the two of us in silence a little too long.

"I had no idea" is all he says.

"I think this one was best" I say propping up the one in my hand, "you get a bit cockier as you move on” His eyebrows shoot up in surprise, "but I'll start with all of these I guess" I grab the matching books and stack them in my arms. Walking over to his desk and setting up. Glancing at the clock it was only 7pm so I decided to just make a start.

Spencer didn't contest. Letting me just get settled at his desk, I pull out my laptop and begin work on transcribing the first volume. After a few minutes he silently places a cup of tea down beside me and goes to sit on the sofa. The time rolls in quickly after that, each time I look up at Spencer he's carefully combing through the file I'd given him. Re-reading it and making little markings in his lavender notebook. I'm not really sure what I put in there that was worth making a note on but clearly he was reading between the lines on some things. That little notebook was like a profile of me.

When he seemed like he'd finished writing he pulls out his phone, scrolling through it aimlessly like I'd never seen him do before. It made him look so normal. His eyebrows knit together as he's looking at something on his screen and he stands up. Making his way over to me at the desk and shows me what he was looking at.

"Who's this?" he asks, "This guy you're with?"

I recognize the photo instantly. It's from a few years earlier, Nathan and I on the beach, my head resting on his chest. He'd taken it while we were on vacation celebrating our anniversary. That was about a month before I got into the BAU, I had no idea that was going to be our last anniversary. I gulp down the emotions that it stirs. I'm mostly over the whole thing by now, but looking at old photos like that, photos of happier times, it can still sting.

"That's uh, the boyfriend I was telling you about last week. Nathan, we broke up not long after I joined the BAU?" he nods, but he's smart, and I kind of figure he already knew that.

"Ah alright" he takes out the hardback and jots another note down. Maybe he's trying to get a read on me.

"What are you doing?" I gesture to the phone,

"It's research, do you not think that if you and I were really dating that stalking your social media profiles would be on my agenda?" he's smug, and he's right. But I guess I just didn't expect it from him.

"Well that's not really fair now is it? I can't reciprocate, you've got no social media presence whatsoever!" he finds that funny, letting out a deep chuckle and tucking his phone away in his back pocket.

"Maybe so, but that imbalance is hardly my fault. Besides, you've read all my dissertations apparently..."

"Bastard" I joke, slamming my laptop shut and throwing a pen from his desk at him so that it lightly bounces off the top of his head.

"Hey, there's no need for violence Y/N!" he rubs the spot beneath his curls, "Maybe it's time you took a break actually?" he says, sitting himself back down on the sofa.

I was reluctant to admit it but he was right. My eyes were starting to go a little fuzzy after looking at the screen for so long. I stand up and stretch my arms out above my head, feeling my spine stretch out after sitting for so long, letting out a low groan. Spencer waves me over to the sofa and I join him.

"How about we go back to basics?" Spencer asks with a small grin, and I can't help but let out a long sigh.

"I thought I was taking a break, no more questions" he just laughs at me,

"Relax, you're not that interesting, it's just a simple question." he states, and I'm not sure if I'm supposed to find it funny or offensive

"Ugh, fine, shoot"

"Well, actually it's two questions" he corrects, "what's your favorite movie, and what's your favorite snack?"

I'm confused mostly by the fact that it actually is a simple question, I was expecting something a lot more contentious, but also because he looks eager to know the answer.

"I'm not really sure what my favorite movie is to be honest, one of them is Night of the Living Dead?"

He nods to himself, and jots it down in the notebook again, "Alright, I can make that work" he stands up off the sofa before turning back to me, "and snack?"

"Peanut butter cups I guess?" I respond and he grins ear to ear, which is a completely new sight, and I like it way more than I thought I would.

"Perfect, gimme 2 minutes!" he leaves the living room and wanders towards the kitchen.

Spencer returns a few minutes later with a DVD, a packet of peanut butter cups , and a thick knitted blanket gathered in his arms. He drapes the blanket over me and gently places the peanut butter cups on top of it before popping the DVD into the player and sitting down beside me. I'm not really sure how to process any of the situation. Am I about to watch a movie on Spencer Reid's sofa? Sitting next to Spencer Reid?

"I... I, uh, thought you were just asking for your notes?" I ask, pointing at the notebook resting in his lap. He picks it up and throws it onto the coffee table.

"Sometimes I find experience is the best teacher, don't you?" he asks before pressing play, “And besides, it should keep you quiet for a whole 96 minutes” of course.

I can only nod in agreement, I'm not really sure what I'll say if I try to speak. I get myself cosy under the warm blanket and we watch the movie in near silence.

Once the credits roll Spencer finally speaks up, "I actually went to see a screening of this last month downtown, there was this little old horror movie fest-" I cut him off without really realizing, I'm just strangely excited that we've genuinely got something in common.

"Holy shit, I was there!" I say, more enthusiastic than the situation calls for.

He laughs at my excitement, "Well, I guess we have more overlap than I thought, that should probably help with the whole charade." he stretches his arms up over his head and let's out a small, gentle yawn. I'd been enjoying myself more than I thought I would, or would ever tell Spencer, that I'd almost forgotten that we'd both been on a case for almost every waking moment of the past week. I really should feel a lot more drained than I do.

I was just after midnight when I suggested that I head back home. I offered to take some of the books home to work on throughout the weekend but Spencer insisted that I just work on them whenever I came over again. I sort of felt like I should thank him for the evening when I was on my way out the door, or give him a quick hug, no that felt wrong. In the end all I could really muster was a lousy, "goodnight" and a meek wave on my way out the door before I drove home. And couldn't get to sleep.

— —

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chronicallylatetotheparty · 3 years

Text

(Written for Adrien August... I'm not sorry)

Bad Luck: Frozer

Summary: Adrien struggles to move on from his first crush so he confides in one of his friends. Or is she more than a friend?

-------------------------------

Chat Noir smiled sadly down at the red rose in his hands. Passion, romance, true love, he recalled in his head.

"Chat?"

Hiding the rose behind his back as he turned around, Chat Noir grinned at the question in Ladybug's eyes. "I have to say that rescuing civilians without a supervillain around is a nice change of pace. Don't you think, My Lady?"

"Not every day you see a hang glider delivery service," she agreed, smiling at the nickname.

Chest suddenly constricting Chat Noir's smile became a touch strained. "Love to stay and chat but this cat's gotta run!" Taking out his baton he extended it, launching himself away.

"Oh! See you la... ter..." Ladybug called to his retreating form.

---------------

Landing in the empty locker room Adrien detransformed in a flash of green light. Plagg stretching as he came out of the ring.

Eyeing Adrien's downcast features, Plagg pried at his holder. "It's not like you to leave Ladybug so abruptly."

"Yeah..." Adrien absently offered a wedge of Camembert to his floating friend who promptly swallowed it whole. "Guess I just need some time to myself."

"So she turned you down. There's plenty of other kinds of cheese!"

Despite himself Adrien smiled. "You need better metaphors."

Plagg shrugged. "You could always take it literally. You can never have enough cheese!"

Adrien rolled his eyes as he changed into his fencing gear. Plagg wasn't as articulate as he thought but... he wasn't wrong...

These thoughts swirled in Adrien's head as he joined Kagami at practice.

A mistake he paid for when Kagami knocked him off his feet. Standing, Adrien parried as Kagami lunged. She always gave her all in beating her opponent. Scoring a point he smiled and they retook their positions.

But his heart still wasn't into the sparing session and her next lunge drove him off balance. Her foil poking into his chest.

"Predictable," Kagami chastised.

Eyes narrowing, Adrien's more competitive nature surged forward at her words. Heart beating faster, grip tightening on his foil and-

It was gone as soon as it came.

Leaving Adrien vulnerable to Kagami's strike...

---------------

Adrien stared pensively at his fencing helmet. He knew Ladybug didn't like him the same way he liked her. That wasn't anything new. So why was he-

"What's wrong, Adrien? Usually I like beating you but it's no fun when you make it this easy." Kagami stood in front of him with an unreadable expression.

Adrien gave her a bittersweet smile. "You ever feel like you're stuck, Kagami? Like, no matter how much you try to move forward, nothing will ever, ever change?"

Kagami blinked in surprise as Adrien opened up to her. This wasn't what she was expecting... Sitting next to him Kagami took a moment to collect her thoughts. "Adrien. The biggest mistake a fencer can make isn't choosing the wrong technique. It's choosing the wrong target."

Oh. She liked metaphors too. Well, with his luck to was bound to-

Her hand gently cupped his cheek and turned his head to face her. "So, switch targets."

...Oh. A rose tint colored Adrien's cheeks. Kagami was always beautiful but for some reason... it was especially true just then.

Smiling in encouragement Kagami grabbed her things and walked out of the locker room. Leaving Adrien to his thoughts.

He stared after her for a moment... Launching to his feet Adrien raced after her in a moment of sheer panic and recklessness.

"Kagami!" Adrien practically shouted.

Not having gone far Kagami turned around, puzzled.

Taking a deep breath, heart pounding against his ribs, Adrien let out the thought that propelled him to his feet. "Would you like to go out some time!?"

Kagami's eyes went wide. "Out? As in a date?"

The color on Adrien's cheeks bloomed into scarlet. Suddenly even more self-conscious he rubbed the back of his neck- "Um," -and nodded. His mouth refusing to form words.

Half turning, Kagami gave him a small smile. "I'd like that."

Adrien felt his lips pull into a grin. Heart somersaulting in his chest for some reason.

---------------

"What should I do, Plagg?" Adrien bemoaned. Head thunking onto his computer desk. "I've never been on a date before!"

"Wasn't this your idea?" Plagg flipped through his favorite cheese magazine. He swore this romance nonsense was the silliest invention humans had ever come up with. "If you ask me it's about time you expanded your palate."

"You're no help," Adrien grumbled. Lifting his head up Adrien swiveled around to look at Plagg. "What if I asked Father or Nathalie for advice?"

"Sure." Plagg stretched lazily. "If ya want them to know about you and sword girl."

Sighing, Adrien discounted that idea. "Oh! We can ask the Gorilla!"

"I don't know," Plagg mused, "doesn't seem like a good idea."

"You just don't like it 'cause he found your Camembert stash that time," Adrien teased, poking Plagg lightly.

"It was perfectly edible! How could he!?"

Chuckling at his antics, Adrien thought about who he could go to for advice...

---------------

Adrien tried not to hurry ahead of Kagami into the ice rink proper. The chill making his arm hairs stand on end. His breath sharp in his throat. Heart beating with a mix of excitement and nervousness. Asking Marinette had been a great idea!

He turned back to see Alya and Nino slowly catch up. If only she could have made it. But that essay on periwinkle migration sounded important to her... Oh, Chloe's dad was here.

As they put on their skates Adrien glanced at Kagami out of the corner of his eye. Scooting closer to Nino he whispered: "Thanks for coming last minute, Nino."

"Hey, no problem dude! Anything for my bro." Nino's grin was a tad forced and his eyes drifted to something behind Adrien before snapping back.

"I don't know what to do with Kagami."Adrien admitted, leaning in. "Should I... offer to hold her hand?"

"Yes!" Nino snapped his fingers and held up finger guns at Adrien. His eyes flickered away again. "I mean, no! I mean- Why don't you take it slow?"

Adrien turned around to see what Nino was looking at but it was just Alya smiling politely, hands behind her back. Probably waiting patiently for him to finish with her boyfriend.

Straightening, Adrien smiled at her. "Thanks for coming, Alya."

"No big deal! Just a double date, right!" Alya smiled wide in an attempt to draw attention away from her accidental inflection.

"...Right." Adrien politely declined to comment on it.

"Anyway!" Alya grabbed Nino's hand and dragged him off. "We'll let you two get to it!"

Adrien turned back to Kagami, who was tying her skates. Hesitantly, he made his way over and stood beside her.

"Don't be scared," Kagami promised conspiratorially as she looked up, "I won't tell anyone."

"About what?" Adrien asked slowly.

"That you don't know how to tie your laces," she teased, kneeling down to do just that. Once done Kagami smiled at him, grabbed his hand and led him onto the ice.

---------------

"I can't believe you agreed to this!" Alya stage whispered. Arm locked tightly around Nino's elbow as they skated on the opposite side of the rink.

"Aw, c'mon Als. Y'know I couldn't leave my bro hanging like that!" Nino widened his eyes and tried to sparkle them like Adrien had. "He gave me the look. How could I say no to that?"

"I know..." Alya sighed. The crease between her eyes softening from accusation to guilt. "I just..." Adrien and Kagami caught her eye as they skated hand in hand. "Feel like I'm betraying my girl just by being here."

Nino patted her hand and gave her a soft smile. "I'm sure the dudette will understand." His gaze drifted towards Adrien and Kagami. "Besides... I don't think she'd want to see this."

"Hey, young man! Have you ever thought about signing up for ice skating lessons!?"

--------------

Kagami turned her head as Alya and Nino skated past them on their lap. "Did you invite them because you were scared of being alone with me?"

"Of course not!" Adrien lied, waving his hand to ward off her words. "It's just... that I asked Nino to help... me."

Her brow creased. "Help you with what?"

"Uh, to perfect my figure skating skills!" Adrien decided.

"But you don't need him for that." Suddenly, Kagami let go of his hand and launched into a short routine of spins and twirls.

Adrien blinked at her presentation before an appreciative smile graced his lips. Kagami has so many talents, Adrien thought as she talked with that man who had been discussing something with Mayor Bourgeois.

Seamlessly, Kagami interlaced their fingers as she took his hand again and pulled him forward with her momentum. Glancing at his smile through the corner of her eye.

"Adrien Agreste, I can see it now!" The skating instructor (that's what he was) was suddenly beside Adrien. "Grace and style model! And professional ice skating champion! If you take lessons with me I'll have you shining like the candles on a birthday cake!"

Skating? Adrien had never thought about it before. "Uh, may-beeee!"

Kagami switched their positions so she was closest to the instructor. "He already does fencing with me," she informed him. And sped up with Adrien in tow.

Adrien stared at the back of Kagami's head. She was very assertive in her desires, bold even. Kagami knew what she wanted and wasn't afraid to go for it. He admired that about her, was drawn to it. Kagami would meet any challenge without backing down.

Just like Ladybug.

His fingers slipped from Kagami's grasp as he slowed to a stop. Staring at the floor as his cheeks burned not with embarrassment but shame.

"Adrien? What is it?" Kagami asked as she circled back.

Adrien smiled. "Nothing. I just have to use the restroom real quick." Turning, he let his smile fall as he left the rink.

Plagg poked his head out of his pocket once they were alone. "What's gotten into you, kid?"

Adrien stared at him. "I don't know."

Worry started to prick at Plagg's fur. "Adrien-"

"I don't know what I want, Plagg!" His heart hammered against his chest, pulse rising to his throat. "Kagami knows. Ladybug knows. Chat Noir thought he knew but... but I don't." Adrien wrapped his arms around himself, making himself smaller.

"... Listen, you're young right? Even by human standards? Like a freshly made wheel of Camembert."

Adrien frowned, turning away. "Plagg-"

"Hear me out!" Plagg zipped closer to Adrien's face, keeping in his line of sight. "But freshly made Camembert is terrible! It's got no flavor! No delicious scent! You need to let it age to bring out all the good stuff."

Adrien glanced at Plagg. Seeing his tail twitching in concern even if he wouldn't voice it. Strangely, Adrien understood what he was trying to say.

"All cheeses age differently. There's nothing wrong with taking your time." Plagg finished, not quite satisfied with how it came out.

Adrien smiled at him, reaching out to pet his head. "Thanks, Plagg."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Plagg let himself be petted. Not because he enjoyed it, of course. It just happened to make Adrien feel better.

Suddenly, ice started crawling up the walls. Magic coming from the ice rink. "Oh, no. Guess we have to go save the day," Plagg said, very disappointedly, yes.

Adrien grinned as he brought out the transformation cheese. "Uh-huh."

---------------

Chat Noir's good humor lasted until he spotted Ladybug on a rooftop. Oh. He didn't... want to see her right now. Reluctantly, he landed beside her. Doing his best to keep the conflicting emotions wrestling in his chest off his face.

"Chat Noir! We need to set up a trap for whoever turned the city into a giant ice rink." Ladybug anchored her yo-yo onto a nearby building, ready to take off.

Say something. Say something! "My feline instincts prefer to track and observe before I attack." Ha! Nailed it! Chat Noir scooted closer to the roof's edge as he scanned the frozen city.

Ladybug gave him a puzzled look. "What? Since when?"

Chat Noir pouted. "Rude."

Shaking her head as she fought back a fond smile Ladybug inched towards him. "We have to work together on this."

His hand rubbed the back of his neck, catching her eye. "I don't know. We don't have to do everything together. If we split up we'll have a better chance of finding him." Chat Noir jumped. "Race you!"

"Chat Noir, be careful!" Ladybug called out as he sped away. "... Okay, so he's acting weird. Not the first time he's acted weird. It'll be fine!" She cast her yo-yo and swung off. I hope.

---------------

Being by himself helped Adrien order his thoughts. His feelings were all over the place so he focused on doing what he told Ladybug he was gonna do. It was child's play to follow the only imperfection on otherwise smooth ice. Leading him to the Eiffel Tower where the akuma victim was hiding.

Okay. Now I just need to-

Frozer launched himself at Ladybug!

Acting quickly Chat Noir tackled Ladybug out of the way. Grabbing her hand and leading her onto the frozen Seine. Skating away at top speed to put some distance between them and Frozer.

"Thanks, kitty!" Ladybug smiled.

And Adrien smiled back. Confusing questions forgotten for the moment. Then Frozer launched shards of ice; Chat Noir letting go of Ladybug's hand so they could dodge it. Only then realizing that he'd been holding it at all.

"He's too fast!"

She was right. Frozer easily kept pace with them. Leaping into the air to launch more ice shards. Rounding a bend in the river they were out of sight for a second. Taking advantage of it to hide.

"I'm positive the akuma's in his skates," Ladybug stated once Frozer passed them.

"My Cataclysm could destroy them but he'd have to be up in the air... You were right My Lady. We're going to have to set a trap."

"You were right, too. We observed and now we know enough."

Chat Noir smiled. "Seems we're just missing a little push of luck to get the edge on him."

Ladybug nodded. "Lucky Charm!"

---------------

Adrien raced back to the ice rink. In the end the plan had been pretty straightforward. Ladybug baited Frozer into following her while Chat Noir laid in wait.

Business as usual. Except...

'Are you sure you're okay? You've been off since yesterday.'

'...I'm just figuring some things out. Might take me a while but that's okay... Thanks for worrying about me.'

Being around Ladybug didn't make him feel quite so sad anymore. Chat Noir meant it when he said her friendship was important to him, after all. And... Adrien was happy. That he could be normal around her.

He spotted Alya and Nino discussing something, waving at them as he looked for... There. Kagami was returning her skates. Adrien walked up to her, fidgeting with his ring. "Uh, hey, Kagami. Sorry I ran off like that."

"It is fine. We were interrupted anyway."

Adrien couldn't tell how she meant that but he took a deep breath and forged ahead. "So, I know I'm the one who asked you out and all. But..."

Kagami frowned. "Are you saying you do not wish to date me?"

"No!" Adrien waved both hands emphatically in the negative. "No, no, no! I just... wanted to say that I think we should take it slow."

She raised an eyebrow. "We go any slower and our pace will be glacial."

Adrien was 90 percent sure that was a joke... 80 percent. "W-well if you think it's too much of a challenge..."

Kagami's eyes widened at Adrien's audacity. She poked him in the chest. "Don't flatter yourself, Agreste."

Without thinking, Adrien grabbed her hand and kissed the back of her palm. Kagami's answering blush nowhere near as radiant as Adrien's. Why did I do that!? Who froze for a moment before turning around. "W-wouldn't dream of it... Ryuko."

"Ryuko?" Kagami raised a brow at the nickname.

Adrien's hand went back to rubbing his neck. "I can call you something else if you don't like it."

"No," Kagami decided, a small smile on her lips as she passed Adrien on her way to the exit. "Ryuko will do just fine."

"... So, that's a yes?" Adrien sprinted to catch up.

"Mm, perhaps if you define what you think 'taking it slow' is."

Adrien leapt in front of her and held out his hand. "Let us drive you home?"

Kagami blinked at the offered hand. Slowly reaching out for it. His palm was warm in hers. "Going slow is not too bad. I suppose," she relented.

Adrien beamed. "Oh! Just one last thing!"

--------------

Kagami entered the Agreste car as Adrien held the door open, sliding in behind her. "You're still doing what other people want."

"No, I just want him to be happy," Adrien countered. Giving the skating instructor free advertising didn't cost him anything. "Besides, how're we supposed to come back if it's a Chloe catered gym?"

"Back?" That sounded promising.

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck and couldn't quite look at her but he smiled. "Since our first date was cut short I was hoping we could try again."

Kagami gazed at Adrien as he fidgeted. "Just the two of us?"

"Y-yup!" Adrien's face burned.

"Good. You're crush on Nino was distracting."

"Wh-what!?" Adrien spluttered.

"... You're crush on Nino? I thought everyone knew. Personally, I prefer Alya but-"

"I don't- That is- I..." Adrien's shoulders slumped. "His eyes are so beautiful, it's like he stares into your soul."

Kagami's hands hovered awkwardly. "I am sorry. I thought you knew."

Adrien buried his face in his hands to muffle his yelling. "I thought I only had the one thing! This is... I don't even know how many things this is!"

Reaching for his hand again, Kagami squeezed it reassuringly. Back straightening as his grip turned out stronger than she expected.

He peeked at her through the splayed fingers covering his red face. Breath speeding up. "I... I don't..."

"You don't have to say anything. I know it is not easy to come to terms with."

Nodding gratefully, Adrien slowly took his hand away from his face. Taking deep breaths.

Kagami relaxed as Adrien did the same. This wasn't what she was expecting. But that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Turns out, Kagami had been aiming at the wrong target too.

Adrien's grip eased as he looked up at Kagami. That was... certainly a lot. But Kagami hadn't turned away from him. Only a handful of people had ever seen him so vulnerable. And two of them preferred to pretend otherwise. But Kagami didn't pretend. And Adrien admired her for it. He smiled, wobbly and honest.

"Thanks... Ryuko."

------------------------------

In case it's unclear the two people Adrien's talking about are Gabriel and Nathalie.

*Rewatches Frozer (again) for this fic* ... If my friend fell and they said they didn't feel well I'd check up on them too. IDK why the the fandom- I mean, Plagg, is so hung up on that part.

I have taken liberties with the production of Camembert for this fic. Please, forgive my transgressions cheese enthusiasts.

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#adrien august #adrien agreste #kagami tsurugi #adrienaugreste #adrienaugust #adrigami #adrimi #frozer #ml fanfic #ml rewrite #bisexual adrien agreste #bisexual kagami tsurugi #ml #miraculous ladybug

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