I can’t understand how people are angry with the kiss. Yes, it didn’t come from the best of circumstances but that scene was utterly perfect in all aspects of emotion, music, writing, and acting.
I definitely do not like angst but while I was sad with this scene I was also extremely happy. Even though they is a rift in the relationship. Even though Aziraphale has chosen to leave, they still recognized their feelings.
We saw it first on Aziraphale’s look to Crowley when Gabriel and Beelzebub were being lovey dovey, he wanted that and knew he wanted it. Then Crowley has the talk with Nina and Maggie and actually fully recognizes his romantic feelings for Aziraphale!!
He pleads with Aziraphale not to leave him because he sure as Hell isn’t going to Heaven. He’s always wanted it to be them but now knows why. It isn’t because of an apocalypse that he could also reasonably run away from himself. No. He wants it to just be him and Aziraphale (+ Earth if we’re being honest here).
And Aziraphale acknowledges this. He wants it to be them. Us. But in heaven, a place that Crowley would never want to go unless he absolutely needed to. He knows now that Crowley feels strongly towards him, more than he knew before, he welcomes it on one condition. However that condition is too much of an ask for Crowley, who knows the truth.
Crowley tells him the the nightingale is no longer singing. It’s heaven or him and Crowley knows the choice that Aziraphale is making. But he still wants Aziraphale to truly know what that means.
They both plead more but Aziraphale has had enough and turns away. He can’t face his own feelings head on when he knows Crowley can’t come with him.
For Crowley this head turn is the last straw. He has no more options. Aziraphale has chosen. He’s not going to budge. But that turn shows Crowley that Aziraphale is willing to leave him and the long life that they’ve lived together.
In a desperate plea he rushes over and pulls Aziraphale into a kiss. For most of their time on Earth they couldn’t even admit to being friends. In the past few years they’ve slowly been able to admit that. But they were still closed off.
Demons, angels, they didn’t need to show any physical indication that they cared for each other. They just knew.
For Crowley, he was impulsive and always following the newest fashion trends. He moved too fast for an Aziraphale who held on to what he could of the past. He ran a damn antique bookshop where he refused to sell any books for fucks sake.
For Crowley, once he realized his feelings the decision to kiss Aziraphale was an easy one to make. But for Aziraphale it was catastrophic. It was too much all at once.
But he still tried to hold onto Crowley. He tried to savor something so unusual yet so wonderfully full of love. He’s still scared. It’s evident when Crowley pulls away.
He tries to say the first thing that comes to mind but he stops himself. He forgives Crowley for what he did. He forgives Crowley for trying to influence him one last time.
Tired of it all and his terribly dense angel, Crowley leaves.
Aziraphale needs him so bad in this moment. He almost starts crying as he touches his lips. Something so full of love that had to occur at such a terrible time.
He’s stuck on his decision but can’t help but look back to Crowley before leaving for heaven. Even when he didn’t want to admit it, they were always on their side. But their side didn’t exist anymore.
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